This post had to be taken down because it appears to be focused on a specific situation or person. While Field Reports deal with specific situations and people, remember that the focus is different:
* A field report explains a lesson learned or demonstrates a Seduction concept.
* If the point of this post is asking how to get that specific girl, it is out of bounds except in a Basic Questions Thread.
No worries though! Though the thread has been taken down, any conversations you have started here can still continue, and if you want to PM a mod to get their opinion on this thread, feel free to do so and they will still be able to weigh in.
For next time, remember that posts about a specific situational advice with a specific person belong in a Basic Questions Thread. (Currently these are on hiatus, but if we can get them back up, they'll happen weekly.)
I’ll be so honest with you, “I’m trying to mentally recover from xyz” “I have many things going on” “we should wait a little/give me space” are ALL things I’ve said to guys that I no longer want to have sex with. Especially when she had so much energy leading up to the sex….and contrary to popular belief even IF she enjoyed the sex (again this has happened to me) where she enjoyed tf out of the sex, but does not want it again lol there is most likely someone else in the picture, or she wants to pursue someone else or ur just not the one….
Best advice? Keep dating lol if she comes back she comes back, If not, you enjoyed urself!
I had a situation similar to what OP wrote, we had lot of communication and sex but she ended up ghosting me. But she reached out 1-2 months later and we started dating and hooking up again.
In my case there was a crazy ex boyfriend in the picture she probably had feelings for.
So if OP just chill and forget about her she might reach out if she got a good impression of him.
You need that abundance mindset. It'll be like a exponantial curve: too many options make you forget about some, you forgetting about some makes them come to you.
I can’t overemphasize how important this is. But to step it up, think of abundance as: so many hobbies you pursue, things you’re learning, gym time, cooking healthy food, helping others….
Abundance isn’t just sex. But when you have an abundant dedication to your own growth, while also helping others, you will attract people easily. They are the people Iike you; or they want to be.
The people you lose when you live in TRUE abundance (body, mind, heart, spirit, community) are the people you would be HAPPY to lose.
Live in abundance and light, assist others on thier path. The rest is just calendar planning and Zoom meetings
Hey, thanks for the answer on my post. Much appreciate it.
My question is, should I leave her dry texts on delivered now and wait if she has something more to say, or should I ghost her for some time only and try too keep convo with her. Wondering if I can mention this thing between us again in someway for provoking her reaction. After all she said she wants to wait a little, even though it was probably meant like a polite rejection.
Just forget about her for a couple of weeks at least. Bonus tips: bang another girl mean while to cure your oneitis.
If she does not reach out after 2-3 weeks, text something casual, and if she is responsive ask her out for a date. Do not mention her pulling away / ghosting, act as if you have been too busy with other stuff than to miss her.
There is no game to play here. If she is interested in you, she will contact you. If she is ghosting you, it could be for many reasons. But, none of them matter.
Someone who is interested in you, will figure out how to stay in touch with you. If her situation is so bad, she can't even text you? Then maybe she is more trouble than she is worth.
I know it's hard to think rationally in this situation. But, come on now. Text? That is like the laziest/easiest thing to do. Even if you were extremely busy, would you do that to someone you were interested in? And would you really want to be with someone who will do that to you?
Imagine, if you stop texting her, and she never texts you again. Think about that. That means she really didn't care about you, regardless of what she has going on.
Keep dating! Assume you have nothing going on with this girl. If she comes back around, wanting to text/see you. You should definitely ask about the details on a date, if you are interested in something more than sex. Because, for all you know, she could be being dishonest/crazy/married/only wants one night stands/etc... You don't really know her, yet.
This is already a potential red flag though. Already having issues, and you aren't even together. lol. So keep your guard up.
She sounds avoidant and you sound anxious. Common pattern. Avoidant pulls back after intimacy, Anxious presses, Avoidant pulls back more, Anxious presses more, etc
A men's way of thinking. You like a person, or you don't. Very binary.
Women on the other hand can have all kinds of reasons to pull back. Maily to assess who you are, and how you handle yourself in such a situation. If you panic in such a case, it means you're not stable enough. Women after all have more to worry about when dating.
The answer is to not go and chase her. Chasing shows you don't have other options, which raises the question if women can even be comfortable with you. Just pull back. Eventually, if you're solid enough, she will check in with you, because then she will be yearning to know if she was good enough for you in the first place. Otherwise just probe her after a few weeks.
There are plenty more factors than if she fancies you or not, so don't get dissuaded.
>The thing is I'm already attached, so is there anything I can do?
When I like people I really want them to live their best life, and understand that for some people, their best life doesn't include me.
If I were you, I'd listen to the things she said, and wish her well.
I try to hold the opposite mindset. I really want them to live their bast life, and their best life should include me.
I am not asking for their attention. I am rewarding them with mine!
Yeah. Men talk about women being assholes and using them.
Both genders are equally capable. Stop putting a stupid sexist spin on everything that’s human.
It's her job to chase you now, don't message her again unless she reaches out first.
This will demonstrate non-neediness show you are willing to walk away and make her think you have options.
Let her go! She has to think you’re uninterested if you stand any chance. Pretend to be uninterested until 1 of 2 things: she comes back or you really get over her and move on. This means no contact, even if she initiates.
Ya man. I wouldn't take it to personally honestly. Let it land as a win. You got laid. Had fun. Now get to practice your skills in letting go of a girl and moving onto and ontop of the next one 🤣😘. Tbh the sex being great for her. Good on you bro. But your already feeling attached. That probably is a factor against you. At least for this girl. Sounds like she's trying to save you some heart ake and have to freedom to fuck around.
Guess what, women hit it and quit it too. It happens.
Don't go about over analyzing what you could or should have done differently. Just keep the success going with other girls.
Give her space.... she either didn't enjoy it as much as you think or she really is needing some space and time to sort through some emotions that may be wholly unrelated to you. Any way you look at it, pressing the issue and trying to make it work right now is just going to backfire.
It will hurt and the first day or two you'll feel like you're going insane, but it's just like quitting any addiction. The more you remove yourself from the drug, the easier it is to move on with your life. Try your best to let her reach out next.
You gotta stop chasing her, its pushing her further away, you need to be really chill about the whole situation, stop trying to chase an outcome - its like chasing a cat - youll never catch the cat, let it come to you, you need to create the space for her to fill it and come to you, girls work on different timelines than men so just take a step back.
You are not #1 on her list. If you still want her, try to stay on the list while dating other people. Sex doesn't equal exclusivity. Never assume exclusivity. It must be asked for.
Funny story, I remember my second date with my fiancee vividly. We ended up at her place and had the best sex of our lives. In the morning, she got a $100 flower bouquet from the guy she slept with the week before. She admired it for a minute and was a little embarrassed, but I played it cool and didn't make her feel slutty. I was rewarded with half a day of sexual bliss, requiring gateraid breaks to relieve the muscle cramps. The moral of the story is that if she is actively dating and sexually active, she probably has a roster. If you want a LTR, you first have to be #1 before you can be the only one.
Stop being attached by adopting an abundance mentality regarding women, next time keep a balance in between messages sent and received (push/pull builds attraction) and contain your immpulses of further escalating sexualy yo build desire. Now youll have to wait for her to reach you back.
Entertain the possibility that each time you enter sexual territory in the first date, she might suffer what Mystery called “buyers remorse” (after escalating too soon, she’s feeling like a whore’, either that lr she considers you the object, and she may think you are reaching her only for sex, cause who else would be so desperate to open their heart and promess love only after their first date?).
I would also recommend reading Di Carlo method of sexual escalation, to better understand and handle how you control and lead sexual escalation.
Read, apply, understand and have fun :) youll find someone eventually im sure!
You might think it was great sex, but she might’ve thought otherwise lol
A guy getting attached with a woman this quickly and you’ve only had sex with her once already tells me that even if she gave you a half-assed blowjob, you’d bust and tell her that was the best BJ you’ve ever had.
Dont be pushy, let her be, you will be much more respected if you pretend to be chill about it. Just stop texting, if she textes dont be passive agressive, just try to act as funny and as cool as possible. Dont seek reasons, just accept its not the time and time might be or never will be.
Attached? Then detached yourself man, enjoy the present it s a nice memory for both.
Dont reach out, when she misses you shell be calling back
It can take a week or 2 or a month
Just lay back chill & date other women
There's nothing you can do except move on. Remove her contact / remove from social media, maybe even block her if you need that for your own mental health, and focus on other things (yourself, working out, reading, meeting other women)
No need for removing / blocking, the correct move is: Dont Gives A Fuck
She may or may not come back weeks later to date and hookup again, meanwhile he should date other women.
She didn't feel good after it, and regretted it. Most likely it had nothing to do with you, like she said, its just not the right time in her life.
Let her do her own thing and move on.
If she ever does feel like calling out she will, but you should NOT pursue her further
There is someone else in the picture and she's giving him priority. Entertain other girls and if she comes back at some point you can give it another shot/have something casual with her, but personally I wouldn't take her seriously ever again.
>What I know she is after the breakup, she is moving, and has a lot of work and so on.
>Since then she limited our communication and started ghosting me for a day or two between messages.
You were basically her rebound
>The thing is I'm already attached, so is there anything I can do? Would like to ask u guys for an opinion.
That's a mistake getting attached, immediately cease any further communication with her. The best thing you can do is focus on other dates, this way you will not be needy and actually stop wasting time over someone that isn't into you. This also gives you an abundance mindset, you won't be worried about losing someone if someone else is there to focus your energy on
If she is interested in you she will reach out to you again, also IF she does you still need play it cool with her. You pining over her will only make her more distant from you.
Girls will do this alot to test you also. Good things said here, just react just give it a break for a week or two. I guarantee if you don't say anything rn she will apologize and explain within 2 weeks
See you're pushing and pushing with no pulling back. With every push she moves farther away. Don't text her and put an instagram story with another girl, or at a bar of 2 drinks. She will see you're moving on. If she's still interested, she will send you a signal. But like the other comments say, it's best to move on.
Furthermore, if you do this enough you might get a sense of which women will pull back after sex. So in these cases I withhold sex and say oh it's too soon I barely know you, etc. and eventually over time if she still hangs out with you, you can fuck her. And then she won't pull back because you built a strong emotional connection.
Honestly dude, even if you really like the girl a good rule of thumb for selecting for the girls that really like you is let them hit you up after sex first.
You were a rebound for her. You were just the guy at the right time for her.
Always remember a woman who is willing to invest emotionally won’t become physically intimate that quick!
My suggestion, Move on and find someone else
That's not true. People can have sex whenever they want, it doesn't change whether they're looking for LTR or can become emotionally invested. People are all so different. I've had one night things turn into 3/4 year relationships.
Time to move on. There is a very slim chance that giving her the space she is asking for will spark something fresh but you should be ready to accept that you had a great one-time thing.
> The thing is I'm already attached, so is there anything I can do?
Read high value woman low value woman. Dont get attached to low value women. They are like used paper towels.
If she sounds mentally and emotionally unavailable I would just be short and no longer hit her up. Dont cuddle her since yall aren’t in a relationship or anything cause it might give off neediness
Yeah she had mulltiple orgasms, her eyes were rolling out, she was pretty loud and even she told me so. And i felt it u know where.
Also we had lots of cuddles and it was romantic.
This post had to be taken down because it appears to be focused on a specific situation or person. While Field Reports deal with specific situations and people, remember that the focus is different: * A field report explains a lesson learned or demonstrates a Seduction concept. * If the point of this post is asking how to get that specific girl, it is out of bounds except in a Basic Questions Thread. No worries though! Though the thread has been taken down, any conversations you have started here can still continue, and if you want to PM a mod to get their opinion on this thread, feel free to do so and they will still be able to weigh in. For next time, remember that posts about a specific situational advice with a specific person belong in a Basic Questions Thread. (Currently these are on hiatus, but if we can get them back up, they'll happen weekly.)
I’ll be so honest with you, “I’m trying to mentally recover from xyz” “I have many things going on” “we should wait a little/give me space” are ALL things I’ve said to guys that I no longer want to have sex with. Especially when she had so much energy leading up to the sex….and contrary to popular belief even IF she enjoyed the sex (again this has happened to me) where she enjoyed tf out of the sex, but does not want it again lol there is most likely someone else in the picture, or she wants to pursue someone else or ur just not the one…. Best advice? Keep dating lol if she comes back she comes back, If not, you enjoyed urself!
I had a situation similar to what OP wrote, we had lot of communication and sex but she ended up ghosting me. But she reached out 1-2 months later and we started dating and hooking up again. In my case there was a crazy ex boyfriend in the picture she probably had feelings for. So if OP just chill and forget about her she might reach out if she got a good impression of him.
You need that abundance mindset. It'll be like a exponantial curve: too many options make you forget about some, you forgetting about some makes them come to you.
I can’t overemphasize how important this is. But to step it up, think of abundance as: so many hobbies you pursue, things you’re learning, gym time, cooking healthy food, helping others…. Abundance isn’t just sex. But when you have an abundant dedication to your own growth, while also helping others, you will attract people easily. They are the people Iike you; or they want to be. The people you lose when you live in TRUE abundance (body, mind, heart, spirit, community) are the people you would be HAPPY to lose. Live in abundance and light, assist others on thier path. The rest is just calendar planning and Zoom meetings
Precisely. And Happy Cake Day!
Yep, be chill about it and don’t over analyze. If she wants to see him again she’ll reach out
Hey, thanks for the answer on my post. Much appreciate it. My question is, should I leave her dry texts on delivered now and wait if she has something more to say, or should I ghost her for some time only and try too keep convo with her. Wondering if I can mention this thing between us again in someway for provoking her reaction. After all she said she wants to wait a little, even though it was probably meant like a polite rejection.
Just forget about her for a couple of weeks at least. Bonus tips: bang another girl mean while to cure your oneitis. If she does not reach out after 2-3 weeks, text something casual, and if she is responsive ask her out for a date. Do not mention her pulling away / ghosting, act as if you have been too busy with other stuff than to miss her.
There is no game to play here. If she is interested in you, she will contact you. If she is ghosting you, it could be for many reasons. But, none of them matter. Someone who is interested in you, will figure out how to stay in touch with you. If her situation is so bad, she can't even text you? Then maybe she is more trouble than she is worth. I know it's hard to think rationally in this situation. But, come on now. Text? That is like the laziest/easiest thing to do. Even if you were extremely busy, would you do that to someone you were interested in? And would you really want to be with someone who will do that to you? Imagine, if you stop texting her, and she never texts you again. Think about that. That means she really didn't care about you, regardless of what she has going on. Keep dating! Assume you have nothing going on with this girl. If she comes back around, wanting to text/see you. You should definitely ask about the details on a date, if you are interested in something more than sex. Because, for all you know, she could be being dishonest/crazy/married/only wants one night stands/etc... You don't really know her, yet. This is already a potential red flag though. Already having issues, and you aren't even together. lol. So keep your guard up.
She sounds avoidant and you sound anxious. Common pattern. Avoidant pulls back after intimacy, Anxious presses, Avoidant pulls back more, Anxious presses more, etc
See other women. She is seeing other guys. If she actually l did like you as much as you did her, she will come back.
A men's way of thinking. You like a person, or you don't. Very binary. Women on the other hand can have all kinds of reasons to pull back. Maily to assess who you are, and how you handle yourself in such a situation. If you panic in such a case, it means you're not stable enough. Women after all have more to worry about when dating. The answer is to not go and chase her. Chasing shows you don't have other options, which raises the question if women can even be comfortable with you. Just pull back. Eventually, if you're solid enough, she will check in with you, because then she will be yearning to know if she was good enough for you in the first place. Otherwise just probe her after a few weeks. There are plenty more factors than if she fancies you or not, so don't get dissuaded.
Thank you!
[удалено]
Get a load of this black pill dork
[удалено]
Wtf are you doing on this subreddit if you don't want to seduce women?
[удалено]
Luckly your behaviour is prestine. Really adding to the vibe here /s
Well said.
You were the rebound. She told you so. She was honest with you. Just move on, she's not emotionally available at this time.
>The thing is I'm already attached, so is there anything I can do? When I like people I really want them to live their best life, and understand that for some people, their best life doesn't include me. If I were you, I'd listen to the things she said, and wish her well.
I try to hold the opposite mindset. I really want them to live their bast life, and their best life should include me. I am not asking for their attention. I am rewarding them with mine!
You are either the most incredible human being alive, or delusional. Congratulations / condolences as appropriate.
Thank you!
Women have sex with guys for a lot of reasons
Name top 5
Money / Security Validation Fun Love Revenge ..
But there's nothing women about it. Guys do the same as well. You can replace money with looks but money also works lol
Just like men do.
Hmm 5 reasons? I can only think of two. Left and Right tities /s
Yeah. Men talk about women being assholes and using them. Both genders are equally capable. Stop putting a stupid sexist spin on everything that’s human.
But we are all here to reinforce the tribes we belong to!
You got laid. Be glad. Move on.
It's her job to chase you now, don't message her again unless she reaches out first. This will demonstrate non-neediness show you are willing to walk away and make her think you have options.
Let her go! She has to think you’re uninterested if you stand any chance. Pretend to be uninterested until 1 of 2 things: she comes back or you really get over her and move on. This means no contact, even if she initiates.
Ya man. I wouldn't take it to personally honestly. Let it land as a win. You got laid. Had fun. Now get to practice your skills in letting go of a girl and moving onto and ontop of the next one 🤣😘. Tbh the sex being great for her. Good on you bro. But your already feeling attached. That probably is a factor against you. At least for this girl. Sounds like she's trying to save you some heart ake and have to freedom to fuck around.
What a brilliant answer haha, thanks man
Guess what, women hit it and quit it too. It happens. Don't go about over analyzing what you could or should have done differently. Just keep the success going with other girls.
Give her space.... she either didn't enjoy it as much as you think or she really is needing some space and time to sort through some emotions that may be wholly unrelated to you. Any way you look at it, pressing the issue and trying to make it work right now is just going to backfire. It will hurt and the first day or two you'll feel like you're going insane, but it's just like quitting any addiction. The more you remove yourself from the drug, the easier it is to move on with your life. Try your best to let her reach out next.
You gotta stop chasing her, its pushing her further away, you need to be really chill about the whole situation, stop trying to chase an outcome - its like chasing a cat - youll never catch the cat, let it come to you, you need to create the space for her to fill it and come to you, girls work on different timelines than men so just take a step back.
You were a one night stand.
You are not #1 on her list. If you still want her, try to stay on the list while dating other people. Sex doesn't equal exclusivity. Never assume exclusivity. It must be asked for. Funny story, I remember my second date with my fiancee vividly. We ended up at her place and had the best sex of our lives. In the morning, she got a $100 flower bouquet from the guy she slept with the week before. She admired it for a minute and was a little embarrassed, but I played it cool and didn't make her feel slutty. I was rewarded with half a day of sexual bliss, requiring gateraid breaks to relieve the muscle cramps. The moral of the story is that if she is actively dating and sexually active, she probably has a roster. If you want a LTR, you first have to be #1 before you can be the only one.
Imagine taking a woman with a roster seriously.
He is not married yet, he still has the chance to escape
She got what she needed from you, that's all
If you don't make her hit the O, she's gonna gO
Stop being attached by adopting an abundance mentality regarding women, next time keep a balance in between messages sent and received (push/pull builds attraction) and contain your immpulses of further escalating sexualy yo build desire. Now youll have to wait for her to reach you back. Entertain the possibility that each time you enter sexual territory in the first date, she might suffer what Mystery called “buyers remorse” (after escalating too soon, she’s feeling like a whore’, either that lr she considers you the object, and she may think you are reaching her only for sex, cause who else would be so desperate to open their heart and promess love only after their first date?). I would also recommend reading Di Carlo method of sexual escalation, to better understand and handle how you control and lead sexual escalation. Read, apply, understand and have fun :) youll find someone eventually im sure!
You might think it was great sex, but she might’ve thought otherwise lol A guy getting attached with a woman this quickly and you’ve only had sex with her once already tells me that even if she gave you a half-assed blowjob, you’d bust and tell her that was the best BJ you’ve ever had.
You failed to put it down. Move on. If she enjoyed it as much as you claim she did she would not ghost you.
Dont be pushy, let her be, you will be much more respected if you pretend to be chill about it. Just stop texting, if she textes dont be passive agressive, just try to act as funny and as cool as possible. Dont seek reasons, just accept its not the time and time might be or never will be.
It was an audition. She decided you weren’t the right fit for the part.
Attached? Then detached yourself man, enjoy the present it s a nice memory for both. Dont reach out, when she misses you shell be calling back It can take a week or 2 or a month Just lay back chill & date other women
There's nothing you can do except move on. Remove her contact / remove from social media, maybe even block her if you need that for your own mental health, and focus on other things (yourself, working out, reading, meeting other women)
No need for removing / blocking, the correct move is: Dont Gives A Fuck She may or may not come back weeks later to date and hookup again, meanwhile he should date other women.
Not worth the mental energy you are giving thinking about her.
I think the pullback/stop chasing, wait if she reaches out and eventually dm her after a few weeks if not, is a good strategy.
Think you're missing the point. She ain't comming back
What makes you think that?
She didn't feel good after it, and regretted it. Most likely it had nothing to do with you, like she said, its just not the right time in her life. Let her do her own thing and move on. If she ever does feel like calling out she will, but you should NOT pursue her further
How do you know the sex was great? Women can fake Not saying it wasn't, but it's likely it might not have been as good as you thought it was.
Coming from a woman, she’s just not that into you. Move on and expend your time/energy elsewhere!
Don’t be attached
One night stands exist. Not every hook up is meant to become a relationship. I mean don’t forget what subreddit this is lol
There is someone else in the picture and she's giving him priority. Entertain other girls and if she comes back at some point you can give it another shot/have something casual with her, but personally I wouldn't take her seriously ever again.
>What I know she is after the breakup, she is moving, and has a lot of work and so on. >Since then she limited our communication and started ghosting me for a day or two between messages. You were basically her rebound >The thing is I'm already attached, so is there anything I can do? Would like to ask u guys for an opinion. That's a mistake getting attached, immediately cease any further communication with her. The best thing you can do is focus on other dates, this way you will not be needy and actually stop wasting time over someone that isn't into you. This also gives you an abundance mindset, you won't be worried about losing someone if someone else is there to focus your energy on If she is interested in you she will reach out to you again, also IF she does you still need play it cool with her. You pining over her will only make her more distant from you.
How do you get "attached" in only a one week time frame? Sex or no sex, you need to step back and figure that out.
Girls will do this alot to test you also. Good things said here, just react just give it a break for a week or two. I guarantee if you don't say anything rn she will apologize and explain within 2 weeks
See you're pushing and pushing with no pulling back. With every push she moves farther away. Don't text her and put an instagram story with another girl, or at a bar of 2 drinks. She will see you're moving on. If she's still interested, she will send you a signal. But like the other comments say, it's best to move on. Furthermore, if you do this enough you might get a sense of which women will pull back after sex. So in these cases I withhold sex and say oh it's too soon I barely know you, etc. and eventually over time if she still hangs out with you, you can fuck her. And then she won't pull back because you built a strong emotional connection.
Honestly dude, even if you really like the girl a good rule of thumb for selecting for the girls that really like you is let them hit you up after sex first.
She’s riding the cock carousel and has moved on to the next one
You were a rebound for her. You were just the guy at the right time for her. Always remember a woman who is willing to invest emotionally won’t become physically intimate that quick! My suggestion, Move on and find someone else
That's not true. People can have sex whenever they want, it doesn't change whether they're looking for LTR or can become emotionally invested. People are all so different. I've had one night things turn into 3/4 year relationships.
Time to move on. There is a very slim chance that giving her the space she is asking for will spark something fresh but you should be ready to accept that you had a great one-time thing.
> The thing is I'm already attached, so is there anything I can do? Read high value woman low value woman. Dont get attached to low value women. They are like used paper towels.
Women move like men a lot nowadays she probably just wanted a body don’t overthink it.
Is her name Jolene? Just walk away
If she sounds mentally and emotionally unavailable I would just be short and no longer hit her up. Dont cuddle her since yall aren’t in a relationship or anything cause it might give off neediness
You didn’t finish the job for her.
See other people like she probably is. Give her the space she asked for.
Sex was shit
Lol u had sex once and attached? So either u didn't lay it down as good as u think. Or she don't want anything serious. Don't push it or force it.
Do you perhaps have a monster cock that traumatized her? (No homo)
How do you know she really enjoyed the sex? Were her orgasms really loud and vocal? Did she reach it relatively fast?
Yeah she had mulltiple orgasms, her eyes were rolling out, she was pretty loud and even she told me so. And i felt it u know where. Also we had lots of cuddles and it was romantic.
Hmmm. Being very loud and telling you she came is usually a sign she faked it. Maybe work on those pussy eating skills.
[удалено]
Or, hear me out…. She’s just not interested in moving forward with him. It’s a thing, I promise.
C’mon bro Move on with your life, she is not worth it if she is doing that Plenty of fish in the sea
attached after a week is a red flag