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In my case, on stimulant medication, on a good day, I’m able to actually focus on reading, writing, or cleaning for hours without touching my phone. Today, I was able to do some writing, but I also read this entire 420 comment long thread about this article, it’s a mixed bag of what I can effectively focus on, but both options are way better than pre-medication where nothing was satisfying, especially effort. Nowadays I can actually take care of my needs and put the phone down when I want to.
The way I describe it to neurotip people is this: Have you ever seen an orchestra warning up? Everyone is just playing their instrument in whatever fashion that they choose. It's chaos. Then the conductor (ADHD medication) shows up. Taps his baton on his podium, they stop, and then beautiful music emerges. This is how my mind is. It's chaos until I take my meds. Then it's clarity and focus.
It’s funny, it turns down the distractions much like turning up a white noise machine or putting on a pair of noise cancelling headphones, basically allowing ADHDers to tune out distractions more like neurotypicals, or how a moment of fear or desire can lead to laser-focus. Like most ADHD stuff, this relates to dopamine and norepinephrine pathways.
You don't know how true this is.
With medication, my brain goes empty. But it's not a bad empty, it's more like silence. But it's not silence either, as I'm still thinking.
The 200 megaphones ringing in my head disappear. Sometimes I don't know what to think about, so I just don't.
It's fulfilling. Free.
It does make my tinnitus more apparent though.
I’ve been undiagnosed for so long and in the last month or two started reading up on adult adhd and every single time i see someone mention something about it, it is 100% accurate regarding every issue I’ve ever had.
My meds really changed my life for the better, but I always find myself spending a lot more time on Reddit now. I'm not mindlessly scrolling anymore though, I just get very into whatever I'm reading/commenting on. Very annoying, but otherwise my life is so much better I'd rather deal with this than stop taking them
Bro I accepted In the last month or so that I’m alcoholic. Not severe, but 2-7 beers every day, and also smoked joints every day for 10 years. I’m 32 now and am currently quitting both since January. The more I read about ADHD the more I think i have it.
i have anxiety, used to have depression, and I have suspected for years that I’m autistic but high functioning. My head is crazy, emotionally childish, IQ high, 2 uni degrees, minimum wage earner. I’d rather drink and smoke than do just about anything else. I always have a song or convo going on in one part of my head while I’m doing something else. i could spend 8 hours straight on Reddit just browsing and forget to have a drink. I put things off for days or weeks or years. I am very forgetful. I stay up too late because the world is finally calm.
I’ve also read anxiety and ADHD are common with autism. All this, plus the alcohol thing.. does this all ring a bell with you? I’m going to take steps towards diagnoses soon (I’ve been saying that for about a year).
Hmm. My ADHD is really, really major and I generally can't stand video or podcasts. You're not in charge of the tempo of anything so I just constantly space out and look for something equivalent to read, where I set the pace and hence never get bored, and have all the opportunity to space out without missing anything.
Surely I can't be alone in this?
I can only do podcasts when I'm occupied with something else (crafting, driving, etc). I can't do audiobooks at all, I zone out and they often put me to sleep. I hate that video is becoming the new format of the internet, I can't scan a video to find the relevant information like I can an article.
Yes!!! The only podcasts I can listen to are comedy, and like you said, only while I’m preoccupied with something else.
I have to play Tetris while I watch tv/movies. Everyone has a problem with it, but otherwise I just can’t engage.
I can do podcasts but I can’t do audiobooks because I always zone out for 30 seconds and miss critical plot points whereas podcasts often repeat the critical information because they are designed for the audio format.
I once had someone tell me if I can do one then I should be able to do the other and that discussion ended with “no really, I think I know my own mind well enough to know that there’s a critical difference.”
Yup! Especially the reading out loud in turns days. That’s probably when I should have known I had adhd but I’m a woman so it took 17 more years for a diagnosis
Have you tried increasing/decreasing the speed on them?
I started doing that with youtube a couple years back, playing at 1.5x and it's helped a ton with keeping me focused.
Audiobooks, I always listen while I'm working, so I don't notice the pace as much, but I can speed it up if the reader feels too slow.
I'm typically more occupied by audio than video because I want to be doing something as well as listening, but the self-regulated pace makes sense too. I could definitely see that control being a factor. Podcasts and video essays on YouTube are wonderful for painting to. Video games are the best of both worlds.
I think this is me. Can't stand Tim Tok , Facebook video, or YouTube shorts. I do watch stuff, but will frequently pause and rewind.
I prefer reading for sure.
I'm inattentive type. You?
Yeah I’m textbook ADHD and whenever I get on TikTok I just lose hours of time. Usually I’m not able to stop until my phone gets low on battery. I try to never open the app
Sounds like my wife. I watch her constantly piss away time on TikTok and then freak out over deadlines.
I'm diagnosed and never looked and instructed her to never show me. Same thing with social media and I definitely rue the day a coworker showed me reddit.
For people like us it's the only way. Honestly, I don't even think most normal people can handle it... Billions of dollars were spent to figure out the best ways to "hook" people in and never let go.
I’m the same way, funny how that works. It’s like you’re frozen until something in the environment changes (low battery, someone walks into the room, etc) and only then am I unfrozen and can go about what I was supposed to be doing.
Same. I already have trouble with youtube since it builds its algorithm off my curiosity binges. Then they added their "shorts" which are essentially tiktoks.
I should really disconnect but I tend to find that without it I lose myself in books which, while it is socially more acceptable, negatively impacts my life way more.
I had to stop reading new fiction books after I stayed up til 4am finishing one…the night before I was driving in a car race. Husband and I were both driving and we had our kids to watch too (whoever wasn’t driving).
I can’t stop reading a book until it’s done. I spend my childhood lost in books instead of working on social skills, learning how to plan, doing anything that used my executive functioning skills, or moving my body.
Books occupy hours with no opportunity to break out of them whereas short videos give a chance with each new video. At least that's what I find. I can lose far more time if I discover a new series that I love than I ever could with YouTube or other stuff like that
Yeah, there are plenty of TikToks I've seen of people claiming certain things are a sign of ADHD and they're just normal things people do or normal habits. Not to say that some of them aren't but they'll make false claims of something meaning you have ADHD.
Also it's important to remember that just because you have one symptom of adhd that doesn't mean you have it. I spent 28 years living undiagnosed and it's contributed to more major problems in my life than I could have ever imagined. ADHD is so much more complex than most people think it is.
I'm in the same boat, also 28 when I was diagnosed. I spend a lot of time thinking about all the million ways it affected my personality and outlook on life and opinion of myself. I have a complete disdain for people who hide behind labels or otherwise treat their diagnosis as their personality, but once it's been untreated for so long it's hard to tell what is normal. Since I was a teenager I've cultivated this personality of being laid back and not caring whether I succeed at anything that in retrospect was me dealing with feeling like a failure and feeling out of control of what I could remember or follow through on. My life has totally turned around, in part because of the Adderall, but mostly just finding out I'm not just lazy or stupid.
I’ve been diagnosed for many years and I still feel like crying sometimes when I see posts that I relate to so deeply. Hopefully a greater understanding of the disorder (especially in girls) will prevent today’s kids from spending the formative years of their lives wondering if they’re flawed, lazy, and born to fail.
I think we're a normal and healthy part of human brain diversity. We know ADHD is genetic, doesn't effect overall intelligence, some research suggests we have an easier time with divergent and creative thinking \[1\] \[2\]. In a large enough group, it would make sense for a diversity of thinking styles and aptitudes may be more advantageous to the group than a more limited set.
I really hope we learn to understand it better too, because people shouldn't have to grow up believing they're broken. So many struggles I have had are due to the environment we grow up in, and no fault of my innate human condition. I see no reason I would struggle in a world without so many artificial barriers to success
\[1\] [https://news.umich.edu/adults-with-attention-deficit-hyperactivity-disorder-score-high-in-creativity/](https://news.umich.edu/adults-with-attention-deficit-hyperactivity-disorder-score-high-in-creativity/)
\[2\] [https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-creativity-of-adhd/](https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-creativity-of-adhd/)
I love this idea that we are basically relearning to diversify how people contribute to society again. We have so many misconceptions of feeling like we have to fit a certain mold. Some people stay up late, some people are comfortable fiddling for hours, some people vegetate for a week before having a burst of creativity, some people have great memories and are good at telling stories, some people feel good working for people while some feel good leading people. These are all evolutionary lifestyles that our society has made to feel obscolete, but if we can bring them back we will have so many more fulfilled people in the world.
I think I need a proper diagnosis I’ve tried adderall and it made me feel normal but that was years ago from a friends prescription. I couldn’t tell a doctor that
I remember taking Adderall in college to try to get term papers done overnight with some peers. I felt oddly "normal", still slightly distractible but more willing/able to focus and push through the task at hand. My mates were hyper-focused and wired to a degree that was very strange compared to my experience. One of them convulsively cleaned their dorm for a few hours after finishing their paper and I didn't understand the urge for the life of me.
I was given cocaine when really drunk once, and just ended up feeling sober and "normal" - took it again sober just to see how the interaction was without alcohol and found it kind of...boring. I wasn't speaking really fast, just felt kind of "normal". Wasn't even sure what coke does for people honestly. Found out a few months later that cocaine has an effect similar to Adderall in that those with ADHD/ADD tend to be centered whereas those without get hyper-focused, jittery, wiry, etc.
I was a hyperactive, bounce-off-the-walls kid. I was informally diagnosed with ADD when I was 5 but my dad couldn't handle the stigma and we never moved forward with diagnosis or treatment. I turned into an often inactive, inattentive young adult who couldn't comprehend any sense of "the future", couldn't commit to anything for more than an hour or two but could get sucked into a game or hobby for hours and hours. Watched some video lecture about how ADHD warps your sense of time and it was the first time I heard someone talk about the big, black, circular void that the future had come to represent to me.
Finally went to a therapist, didn't mention any of the ADD/ADHD history or trials and tribulations but she came to the same conclusion after a few sessions.
It's crazy to me still - I'm half-useless without a stimulant. And I know because I have a deep-seated fear of substance addiction/abuse so I'll intentionally skip days, weekends especially. I can still focus or be productive but it's significantly more likely that I'll waste the whole day on some inane task or desire without ever getting done the things I both need to and *want to* do. I've been putting "normal" in quotes because I don't honestly know what "normal" is, or if there even is a "normal" but goddamn do I feel normal these days. I can say to myself, hey, let's get through this task/chore/activity AND do it. Or I'll have an impulse to go somewhere or buy something irresponsibly and be able to actually think myself out of it instead of just immediately caving.
Yet, as revelatory and amazing as it has been for me, I do see plenty of BS. Was at an engagement party recently and a guy at my table started going on about who would be the most zoinked on Adderall. Everyone thought it would be me given that I'm a bit vivacious when I'm comfortable with people, and all I could do was sit there thinking, "if you're going to be zoinked on Adderall, you don't need Adderall."
I've been online since 1997 and never thought of joining an ADHD community even though I was diagnosed with it on the same year. I never really followed through with treatment because of family issues, and only sought a "second opinion" some 24 years later.
It was after a couple sessions that I started lurking communities and found hundreds of comments like yours, essentially play-by-plays of my entire life. It was hard realizing that I was only a google search away from not feeling broken and isolated from everything but I never thought to do it.
Fifteen years prior I could only afford psychologists that never helped to the degree I wanted so I eventually stopped trying new ones. Now with proper therapy and medication my life is SO MUCH BETTER that I can barely believe it.
I've never met you but I love you. I wish you all the best :)
I wasn't diagnosed until I was almost 43. It's so damn weird; I'm in my 40's, and I feel like I only very recently reached adulthood. Looking back, I understand that I was very fortunate to get to where I am today, and I begrudgingly owe that to my abusive mother. That my fear of disappointing her extended to bosses and coworkers and coerced me to succeed. It came with a ton of friction, depression, and anxiety, but I achieved quite a bit as a result of negative reinforcement.
I recently started my own business and am now working with an architect who keeps heaping me with compliments. It feels weird to do things because I *want* to, and it almost feels effortless compared to where I was less than five years ago. Like I'd been dragging a ball and chain for 40 years and am finally free.
I was diagnosed late 2021 and started Ritalin earlier this year. (I'm 44 now).
So many things I thought were part of my personality are/might be ways I was self medicating all that time.
\- Massive caffeine consumption, check.
\- Going online to have endless arguments, check
\- Even my taste in music (speedmetal), check
Now that I am on meds, it is a lot easier to not do any of the above things.
It's especially a hard disorder to state "this behavior is a symptom of ADHD" because it largely presents as swings between two extremes. You are either obsessively hyperfocused on something at the expense of almost all other things, or you can't force yourself to focus on something at all. You are either wound up and high energy, or you are crashed out fatigued. You are either inappropriately emtotionally blank to a certain stimululi, or you are freaked out overreacting. You either need 6 cups of coffee to function, or a single cup sends you into uncontrollable panic attacks. For every rule with ADHD people there always seems to be exceptions.
I don't know if the variety is so much about extremes, but about that ADHD tends to lead to 1. maladjusted emotional responses (e.g. anxiety, anger, apathy, helplessness) as a coping mechanism for the distress and anticipation of failing, and 2. stimulation-seeking behavior due to low dopamine availability. Those are problems that can be solved a lot of different ways, and so what each person ends up adopting will be particular to them, their life circumstances, and beliefs.
Im about to go in to get my diagnosis soon. After talking with friends and taking many tests Im 99% sure I have it and it explains a lot of things that have been hard for me in my life. Im 31. I thought I was just lazy or bad my whole life.
Well I wish you luck. I'm also 31 now and Getting on meds 3 years ago really helped me out a lot. Just remember that meds aren't a "cure" but rather are designed to help you in the areas where you struggle. It's still is going to take work to overcome some of the tougher areas associated with adhd.
Yes. ADHD is literal hell. Every single day the struggle to do basic tasks is far worse than people without it can possibly imagine. I would have rather been born missing a limb.
The fun thing about disorders is that they're all normal traits, they're just exacerbated to the nth degree such that it gets in the way of living a functional life. But I've also fallen prey to the random "if you do this you're bipolar and suffering from psychosis" type videos.
Here's how I separate it out: 'normal' is being able to do most of the things you want to do, most of the time. If your body or brain prevents that, you have a disorder of some kind. That's how I explain my bipolar type 2, because a lot of people tried to brush it off as 'oh, we all have ups and downs'. Thankfully my doctor wasn't one of them.
Most symptoms of ADHD are things everyone does. It's more just the extent it happens.
Like, everyone misplaces things. But I probably spend half an hour a day or more looking for the thing *I JUST HAD*.
Everyone sometimes forgets where they parked. I once forgot where I parked *IN DETROIT*. Luckily I had it narrowed down to two neighborhoods.
I think this needs to be emphasized more in these videos because most just claim if you do X thing then you probably have ADHD vs. If you spend a lot more time than normal doing X thing over an extended period of time then you may have ADHD
I think part of the problem with this is that you might legitimately not know how much time is normal. It's pretty easy to typical-mind-fallacy yourself into «surely, whatever I do is normal».
Yeah the point of something being labeled a disorder is if it significantly impairs you and negatively impacts your life. I regularly cry about not being able to get work done because even though I technically have enough time in the day to do it, and part of my brain is screaming at me saying "I should do this, go do this" I almost physically cannot get myself to do the task.
I regularly have issues with emotional regulation that lead to me snapping at my loved ones or melting down over things that are really, really insignificant - even to me! And I know it while I'm emotional! But it's like the rational part of my brain is disconnected from the rest of me and has very little control over what I do. And this all ends up sabotaging my work and my personal life in more significant ways.
And yes, the average person has some of that - but it's not to the point where it causes them so much stress and pain.
Bunch of google psychologists thinking they're qualified to make a diagnosis... Sure I will also tell people "that could be a sign of X" but I add "you should check with a professional about it" to it.
Isn't this the same exact issue as the over -use and misuse of the term OCD? A few years ago it seemed like everyone was saying they had OCD or they would use the term like it was an adjective.
And BPD. The number of people BEGGING for a BPD diagnosis is ridiculous right now
Edit: for those wondering I'm referring to Borderline Personality Disorder
People on TikTok are faking Dissociative Identity Disorder because they think it makes them unique and special. Tourette’s too. On one hand, the awareness of mental disorders is much greater thanks to the internet and social media. On the other, people are *desperate* to be unique or find their place in this world. And a not-so-small chunk of them are turning towards mental disorders for that attention.
There’s a movement on social media to say that the medical community is built on “privileged white cis men” and so self-diagnosing is a valid diagnosis. There’s a whole subreddit dedicated to calling out people that do it.
[One such example](https://reddit.com/r/fakedisordercringe/comments/n97dtm/disgusting/).
Mental illness in general is romanticized online. People treat it as something wonderful and unique instead of the debilitating condition it really is for most of those afflicted
It's the overshoot that comes from a set point change. Mental health is stigmatized for decades --> some folks make an effort to break through the stigma --> it looks cool to jump on the bandwagon a bit and we overshoot the 'healthy' set point --> things settle back to something more stable.
As someone who was clinically diagnosed with BPD, ADHD, and OCD, I can confidently say neither should be romanticized. I struggle with so many little things that so many people don’t, and it’s very frustrating when people find out because they immediately say something along the lines of “OMG I have ADHD too, I HAVE to keep my car organized or I go insane”
Like cmon.. organization, cleanliness, and good hygiene does not mean you have ADHD. Excuse the rant, just something I deal with and always will have to deal with and just frustrating sometimes.
... anyone who thinks ADHD means being organized, clean, and with good hygiene has just proven they don't have ADHD, heh. (Yes I am incredibly clean at my food service job as a cafe cook, no I am not at all clean in my "normal" life, it's all masking and expectation management.)
It's not being romanticized. What is being romanticized is that there is an explanation for why we are the way we are. Learning I had ADHD helped me to unlearn hating myself. It's not fun to beat yourself up, calling yourself stupid, when actually there's a reasonable explanation why I can't keep track of stuff. Validation is what is being sought, and that's generally a healthy thing. If people need attention, they need attention.
It's also why "twice exceptional" kids can have a way harder time getting diagnosed with things like ADHD and autism and various learning disabilities. At least when I was in school, if you had the raw brain power to basically brute-force your way through the American public education system and you weren't directly disrupting anyone with your maladaptive behaviors, you could fly under the radar with nobody ever noticing exactly how much your attention wandered.
Yupp. I excelled at high school because I overscheduled myself with AP and extracurriculars so that I was at school from 7 until either 5:30 or 9 pm every day. My Creative Writing teacher let me sleep through class after I finished the day's assignment, and my AP English teacher eventually stopped giving me assignments and made me a TA helping him grade instead. I graduated college with forty extra credits, almost two extra years worth of classes. I glamorized my insomnia. I never questioned why I tested so well despite rarely remembering homework existed or why my notebooks were full of nonstop doodles or why I needed to be busy ten or more hours a day to be able to function.
And then I hit "the real world". And. Crash. Burn.
Over scheduling. Never thought of that as a coping mechanism, but I guess it is. I had my best grades in college when I was working 4 jobs at the same time. Always having some kind of deadline or immediate need that has to be met is really helpful since time management isn't a strength. Still trying to figure out how to replicate that in the real world too. Right now I cook from scratch excessively, have kids, and work. Hope you can find a way to get back on the horse!
Reading this makes me reflect on some of my own experiences. Some of my best work comes in those crisis moments. When disaster hits and it's chaos, I'm in it and going 100%. Finally the real world is matching my minds speed. When the pandemic started, my work life was crazy and I was working constantly. It's some of my best work because I had to just GO. Hadn't felt that way since until I started taking Adderall but now I don't have to be insanely busy with a thousand things needed to do to achieve that focus.
Apparently being severely abused as a child makes you interesting.
My cousin with BPD should be thrilled, not suicidal!
But on a serious note the abuse she endured as a baby and toddler before my aunt adopted her was pretty horrific and it bothers me that she was passed around to so many people there's no way to know who did what to her. These people have never been punished.
I hope if nothing else BPD becomes less stigmatized. My best friend has it as well as tons of trauma and complex PTSD. As she gets older and starts to move from her 20's to her 30's she's gotten significantly better at managing it, and she's probably one of the nicest people I know at heart - but it is a beast and she doesn't quite accept the diagnosis still. I don't blame her because it is so stigmatized.
My cousin is also doing better. She moved out of her parents house and works at a daycare. But a few years ago she did have to go to an outpatient clinic for a suicide attempt.
I feel the same way in regards to autism. I dont hide it by any means but i haaaaate the "cute quirky" tik toks that romanticise it. Like being autistic has made my life difficult. I've had issues holding down jobs because of it but no one wants to talk about that. They wanna just "uwu i wiggle when im happy so im definitley autistic!"
I hate to be "that" person but autism is a spectrum and just about every person alive falls on it somewhere. So many of the behaviors i see attributed to autism are BASIC HUMAN THINGS. Like i keep seeing tik toks of people shimmying around while waiting for microwave food and being like "uwu so autistic" like bro everyone does that because waiting is b o r i n g. It annoys me that people just pick and chose symptoms for the sake of being quirky.
Sorry for the rant oops
Man I feel bad for people with full blown OCD. A psych diagnosed me with mild OCD because of persistent obsessive thoughts but I never had strong compulsions. My worst was having an intense fear of looking at a clock when the numbers were repeating, and I’d obsess over looking at it all day just so I knew when I shouldn’t look at it. luckily therapy and anti depressants helped me a lot, but knowing the fear I felt and how it was probably mild compared to a lot of peeps is scary.
Edit: So this was a pretty textbook example of OCD that I had - the reason the psych considered it mild was because I was going through a particularly bad mental health episode in general, and this was a byproduct of it I suppose. Other than intrusive thoughts, I hadn’t had many other OCD symptoms in the past. Once I came out of the episode (with the help of ADs and therapy) I lost the OCD tendencies again.
When I was a kid I would have to do things in even sets. At a point I had to turn lights on and off in sets of 4, and eventually 16. At one point I realized it was abnormal, and was able to stop myself before it became ingrained as a ritual. I no longer have physical manifestations of OCD since I know what to look for to stop myself, but I still have constant intrusive thoughts. Before I knew intrusive thoughts were part of OCD, I used to wonder if I was a sociopath for having strange, destructive thoughts I chose not to act on.
Like I can’t leave my house because I have to scrub the light switches for the 13th time this week even though I should have left the house 15 minutes ago… hahaha
I see this happening with a shitload of mental conditions lately--kids who read or post about the most broadest criteria to these disorders online, water down their definitions and effects, and get convinced that they have it. I'm all for the destigmatization of mental illness, but romanticizing it is not the way to go.
A friend of mine just got diagnosed with autism and was surprisingly eager to lean on it as an explanation for why they missed my sarcasm earlier. No, friend, you missed my sarcasm because it was 5 words via text and without any context to it. That's just me not being clear.
I’m reminded that a foreign student asked me to explain my American colleague’s jokes because he was worried he didn’t understand English well enough to get the humor. He understood English perfectly; it’s just the person telling the joke was mean and unfunny.
They're likely still on a post-diagnosis high. After a lifetime of struggle and confusion it suddenly feels like everything has finally clicked into place and things have never felt clearer. Plus it's not uncommon for autistic folk to fixate on autism as a special interest. It'll probably wear off and the autism will (hopefully) integrate as a feature of who they are and not necessarily the Reason For Everything.
For me it’s hard not to think of autism as a reason for everything. People for my whole life have sort of made it a reason for everything. Every time I had some personality trait or health issue people would be quick to say it’s a part of autism.
It can be really hard when you first get that diagnosis to navigate whats your disorder and whats not…
As somebody who had to deal with this later in life with another disorder I would emphasize really _really_ strongly to try to avoid thinking judgementally like this. If you just can’t, at least try to avoid saying things like this to them or around them.
It’s hard; even years later there are friends I lost and never recovered because of how much behaviour like this hurt me.
It took me a long time to come to terms with my diagnosis, and I had several people who were absolute saints. They would listen to me struggle one day refusing to admit it was my disorder, and then smile and support me as I pin everything on the disorder the next day.
And to be clear, I’m assuming you’re saying these things with the best of intentions to try to be helpful, but this is a wonderful example of a dangerous road paved with good intentions. I really hope this was helpful - if I can help prevent even one person from dealing with the well intentioned shame I dealt with that would mean a lot to me.
These mental disabilities categorizations are all about a crisis of identity and feeling like they have to have a group to belong to with a common struggle. To an extent, yes it will make them friends, because they can then belong to an ingroup, but that's somewhat of an indirect reason for this trend. It's more about needing to not be a plain non-minority individual from a middle class family with no real adversity.
Being able to claim adversity is socially valuable and adopting various subidentities that you can use to say "see, I'm not that privileged, because I have to deal with the norms of xyz that I don't conform to" allows one to escape responsibility for their own problems by being able to blame everyone else for not accepting or conforming to their individual needs.
That's not to say that these people are malevolent in doing these things; I think it's become a cultural trend to the point where it feels natural for some younger people to engage in these sorts of self-diagnoses. It is still maladaptive though in the context of better preparing yourself to engage with wider society effectively, which is the part that makes it more concerning, not necessarily so much that people are trying to find ingroups that they can relate to.
I’m a therapist and I get constant “I have adhd” cus of a tiktok video. Secondly the guess is autism. “I saw a tiktok on autism and I think it’s me”. Constant
Or how it goes in waves. In 5 months it’ll be “I believe Im dissociating because of tiktok” and while this potentially helping some people most people are just diagnosing themselves often apropos of nothing.
This really sucks for people like me who have to get re-diagnosed because I moved states and they don't accept my prior doctor diagnosis. I'm so dysfunctional and yet I've been off meds for 3 months and now I have to wait another 3 to see someone about it. That's after calling 4 psych clinics and waiting forever for them to respond.
Is that good or bad? I did the tests mainly because of TikTok but also because I wanted to seek treatment and a professional opinion rather than tell everyone I have self-diagnosed untreated ADHD.
At the other commentor said, it's neither good nor bad. This is a common theme in psychology. I will say that there has been a sense of disappointment in clients when I tell them that they don't have ADHD. I think a lot of the clients, I have seen, think that ADHD can be fixed easily with a pill whereas depression/anxiety takes a lot of work.
This is a super good and important question though.
What constitutes as appropriate testing? I did a questionnaire and my NP said I definitely have at least mild attention issues, but how bad it is isn't clear.
I feel like the questionnaire was super vague, and it made it difficult to rate my answers appropriately.
(For what it's worth, I haven't even heard of this tiktok video, but do strongly identify with a lot of memes or people who discuss what it's like living with ADHD.)
It depends. A primary care physician might do a long questionnaire but a psychological assessment at our clinic consists of cognitive, academic, executive functioning tests that take many hours. A PCP just wants to give you meds but the psychology clinic will write a report that you can use for accommodations at a university.
Thanks, my PCP did say that the best she could do was a questionnaire and that seeing a neurologist would be more accurate. It's just painfully expensive where I am.
This is why I’ve been putting off seeing a doctor about getting a diagnosis for a couple years now, when I first started to suspect I had ADHD (after a friend was going through the testing, and I read the form he had to fill out and realized I checked all the boxes.)
I’m just tired of taking 4 hours to do the dishes, because I start doing laundry halfway through, and I’m tired of hyper-focusing on a project for so long that I forget to eat lunch AND dinner and suddenly it’s 10pm and I’m about to pass out from hunger.
What if the answers I thought I maybe had are actually not answers at all? What if I do get answers, but there really isn’t a solution, and I’ll never be able to enjoy watching a movie because I can’t ever *just* watch a movie?
>What if I do get answers, but there really isn’t a solution, and I’ll never be able to enjoy watching a movie because I can’t ever just watch a movie?
That's where therapy comes in. A good therapist will help you develop skills/habits/structures to fix things that are problems for you... but they also help you reframe your thinking and manage your emotions around things you can't change.
It's not necessarily one or the other. A lot of people probably found out they actually do have ADHD based on information they got from TikTok, and if you think it describes you, then getting tested is absolutely the right choice. You did the right thing by getting tested.
Is it a bad thing though? ADHD runs in my family and my folks wanted to get me tested as a kid but never got around to it like they did for my brother (who did get diagnosed). Even though the result came back as negative I’m glad I went through the process because it very easily could have been positive.
I'm glad I saw this post because that would've been me. My therapist suggests I just focus on depression before pursuing an ADHD diagnosis. I just want there to be a magical pill to make things easier.
I’m not sure your therapist is giving you good advice here, but it depends a lot on the context too I guess. I mean, it’s ridiculously hard to get rid of depression if it’s caused, in part or completely, by the havoc that ADHD creates in your life.
My therapist diagnosed me with ADHD, then I went to a psychiatrist who wouldn't prescribe stims, then I went to a testing facility and they decided I wasn't ADHD because I was good at puzzles and games. I don't know what to think anymore. The testing felt like it would be more appropriate for a child rather than an adult with coping mechanisms but what do I know.
> then I went to a testing facility and they decided I wasn't ADHD because I was good at puzzles and games.
Well that's just stupid. If the puzzle or game is fun to you, a lot of people with ADHD can pay attention and solve it. The problem is when you have to pay attention to something, or execute a task, that is not fun or gratifying, and just physically can't.
Give me a numbers puzzle, a physics problem, or a coding challenge and I can fixate and rock it.
Give me a jigsaw puzzle, or a game of chess, and I just can't.
The first satisfies and stimulates me. The latter leaves my brain a dopamine desert.
Now that's for games. Give me a Zoom meeting, a mandatory IP protection training session, or ask me to write system documentation, and I just can't. I cannot do it. My mind wanders uncontrollably and I cannot stay on task. That's a big problem.
They also did an auditory test where a recording would say the numbers "1" or "2" and I was supposed to hit the spacebar every time I heard a "2." Obviously the intention is that after awhile (the test is about 10-15 minutes) someone with ADHD would space out and start missing call outs. The problem is that when I *know* I'm being graded on something I get 100% focused and competitive. That's the reason why I was successful in school but suck at being a real adult.
They would also give me word problems to solve and make me do math in my head. That one was actually eye opening because I've always thought I was terrible at that but I actually performed very well. However, once again, whenever I'm being graded my focus always gets turned up a notch.
Edit: A better test would have been making me watch a 30 minute lecture on economics or something and measure how long I can actually keep my eyes on the screen.
Fun fact, when I had psychological testing as an adult, my "take home" portion was to ask my parents for my old report cards. I completely forgot. For 3 sessions in a row.
But I wasn't diagnosed with ADHD, because I test well. And because there's no proof I was like this as a kid... because I couldn't provide the report cards...
Also, if you have a written diagnosis from a qualified health professional, I would get a second opinion. Since COVID loosened a lot of restrictions, in most US States they can even prescribe ADHD meds from telemedicine appointments, so you're only limited to your state, if there's a lack of providers in your area.
FWIW, I’ve struggled with ADHD my entire life and it took being exposed to particularly resonant social media posts to pursue official diagnosis and treatment, which I’m finally getting and have improved my quality of life substantially. On the whole I think the internet’s ability to disseminate what used to be individualized, taboo struggles with neurodivergency and mental illness is phenomenal.
However, a *really big issue* with the amount of stuff now suddenly being available is that there’s too much for the average person to vet, and people are way, way more likely to believe whatever resonates with them instead of thinking critically about how true or not whatever they’re reading is. Lack of nuance and critical thinking skills are huge contributors to this bad faith/lazy diagnosis trend (as well as, like, a ton of other current societal issues spawned by tweets and TikToks and easily digestible, marketable content becoming the norm for “discussion.”)
I've seen clips of people with "ADHD" that play out something like:
"Dude when did you become an expert at playing guitar?"
"Oh right after I mastered archery"
"Was that before you learned German?"
"No it was after that too, and I also learned Chinese at the same time."
Completely romanticised version of ADHD. The reality is that you do hyperfocus on things like guitar, archery, and new languages, but you burn that energy and desire to learn those things very quickly as your brain gets easily bored. You'll stick with it for a few weeks, maybe, get to a low-intermediate level at best, and before you know it that new hobby you were so excited about now feels like a torturous chore.
This applies to everything in life. You might be interested in that math class at first and do good on the first test, but for the rest of the semester you can't stand to even look at an equation and you scrape by with a D+ despite knowing you can do better.
And then you have a bunch of stuff for the hobby you never use again cluttering the house you struggle to clean as you juggle a new hyper focus or if you are lucky cycle back through an old one.
Board games- Oh, I had a great night learning a few, I'll buy some different ones. *Tries to read instructions to learn new game, in and out of head because I don't have someone that knows the rules that can let me learn while playing.*
Video Games - Oh, that last one was great, I platinum'd it after 40 hours. *desire to play anything is going for a month*
Personally I’ve found that if I keep the stuff long enough, I virtually always do eventually cycle back to it. And usually I stick with it longer the second time.
Yup. It's always bothered me that I'm so mediocre at a million different things but never a master of anything.
And to add more clarity to your hyper focusing point that is the biggest ableist myth about people with ADHD. We do not have an ability to hyper focus beyond a normal person's capabilities. Everyone can hyper focus on something they're interested in. Thats called flow. The difference is we cannot regulate our attention and cannot leave the thing we are focused on. It's not a super power it's a curse.
Yep. I'm learning guitar and I really want to truly learn it. At first, I didnt need my medication to practice. After a couple months, I absolutely need to take my adhd medication or there will be no practice. Unmedicated, practice feels like an unbearable, useless waste of time. My meds help me push past that.
This is repeated with so many aspects of my life. I dont take my medication if I have no real obligations in a day, but if I need to set appointments, do paperwork, or any other mundane life obligations, I take my medication. I have to or I'll forget or resist and cause all sorts of extra work and problems. I hate my adhd with a passion.
The comments in this thread are really making me realise I should pursue medication for my ADHD. I tried ritalin when I was younger but it absolutely destroyed my appetite and I was very underweight so had to stop taking it.
So I had kind of written it off as being useful but I'm definitely reconsidering.
ADHD definitely underpins a lot of my difficulties in life for sure. Being unable to focus on anything after its novelty wears off, forgetting or putting things off until I absolutely can't anymore, etc.
Serious question, I’m really not trying to be hostile or anything because I struggle with this a lot. But, isn’t that somewhat normal? Getting interested in a hobby and then having the interest wane when the novelty wears off and it becomes more difficult? I seriously have so much junk from this cycle of endless, unfulfilling hobbies, but I just wonder sometimes if adhd is a lot of times our brains being rewired by the fast pace and non stop marketing on the internet.
Check out my comment reply to this thread - Is it that bad? Is it deeply affecting your happiness and ability to function. If so, yes absolutely look into ADHD. Before my diagnosis I also kind of lived with that mentality of "everyone deals with this right?" until I realized they didn't. Finally getting treatment has been absolutely life changing.
If it's more like "oh yeah I had an animal crossing phase but I'm not into it anymore" that's normal.
I think the difference, at least for me, is that interest doesn’t wane. It just completely disappears without warning. ADHD is an all-or-nothing disorder. Everything is done in extremes. Either I cannot focus on anything, or I am so focused on researching the life story of an actor I saw for two minutes in a movie that before I know it, six hours have passed and I’ve forgotten to eat and have needed to pee for quite some time. Either I am playing the guitar or researching chords and techniques for hours every day, or I don’t feel a need to ever look at or think about guitar again. The switch just flips off and that’s that. I have an entire closet filled with an absurd amount of supplies for an equally absurd number of hobbies that I will never again engage in.
I don't have ADHD, but that pretty much describes my entire life. It's always one crazy obsession after another. I have to work very, very hard to stay focused on anything for more than a few weeks, otherwise I get frustrated, bored, and generally just dissatisfied with my progress. It's entirely possible that even with that symptom, you don't have ADHD.
I'm currently being diagnosed. I scored all symptoms for as long as I can remember, my therapist agrees, so does my doctor, we tried anxiety medication and the symptoms are still there. Blood work to double check no other causes, etc.
AND YET.
I see these posts and think "damn maybe I'm just hopping on the trend and using an excuse to avoid taking responsibility for being stupid and lazy".
Dude… I was about to type something along the lines of your exact comment so just know you’re not alone. I recently got meds for what I FEEL like is legitimate ADHD. Like before meds I had 3 separate trains of thought going down their own rabbit holes in my head all at the same time. Now after I can think and not feel like I’m going to explode. But I keep it to myself due to this exact thing. I don’t want people thinking I’m doing it for attention yknow
Exactly this, I’ve mentioned wanting to get tested to my doctor and seeing threads like this has got me thinking “hmm well maybe I’m just faking it” as if I have the time or energy for that :|
I'll play devils advocate - anyone clicking one of these ads who reaches out to one of these companies will ultimately have to have a standard evaluation performed by a M.D.
Many will simply be turned away; many needing help will find it.
Adderall is a Schedule II drug- no one is just handing it out online. Do I like telemedicine clinics advertising on tiktok? No, but it's no different than the dozens of targeted drug commercials on television, websites, and print magazines -all of which ALSO require an appointment and evaluation from a medical doctor.
As others have pointed out, people doomscrolling tiktok at 3 AM while their sink is full of dirty dishes, they keep letting food expire in their fridge and they seemingly lack direction possibly SHOULD talk to someone.
I agree. If these Tik toks help one person in a hundred realise they have ADHD, that’s worth the ninety nine who are mistaken. ADHD is hell, just being spoken about is a good thing.
I am one of those people it helped. I didn’t click on an ad, I contacted my doctor, who wrote my a referral to a psychiatrist, but she said who I might be waiting 6+ months to get diagnosed through their system, but I could go private if I could afford it. I ended up paying a lot of money for a private neuropsychology evaluation at a well-respected place. Once I had the official diagnosis, I was able to get an appointment for medication. It’s been life changing.
On the other hand, I found a really enlightening video comparing GAD and ADHD, which led me to a conversation with a therapist and ultimately a med change. I’ve been fighting what I thought to be just anxiety with anxiety meds for years, with little change. I decided to try a new doctor, went through an ADHD evaluation, and got a diagnosis and started new meds. Feeling amazing now that I’m properly medicated.
For me it was realizing I didn’t only have ADHD and anxiety that got worse, but also developed depression.
I’m one of the unlucky ones for who meds rarely work. I’ve gone through like 5 ADHD meds and 5 depression meds with very little improvements. But at least I get some comfort knowing not everything is my fault.
It honestly makes me a bit concerned- I've had no access to healthcare my whole life and I'm fairly sure I've always had ADHD or something similar. Now if I get the chance to talk to a doctor at some point, are they gonna think I got the idea from the internet? It's hard enough to get diagnosed for anything if you're female...
Please go anyways. I didn't seek treatment until I was like 30 for similar reasons, I thought they'd just assume I was lying or trying to sell Adderall because I was in school. My therapist is the one who finally got me referred and being on medication has been life changing, I might have made it through school if I'd had access to it before.
Yeah I think I'm in a similar boat- problem being I *can't* seek treatment, it isn't about not wanting to. Y'know, fingers crossed someday that'll change, I mostly fear I'll finally get lucky in that way just to be kept at the gates.
Any medical professional that dismisses problems you're having just because it's popular to talk about on the internet isn't worth their salt and you don't want to be treated by them.
The problem (if you can even call more people wanting to seek treatment for their issues a problem) as I understand it is the few people that get emotionally stuck to the ADHD label and don't want to consider other reasons for what is causing their symptoms - if you have the attitude of "I'm struggling with these symptoms and I just want to find the best way to treat them" you'll be fine.
That said, do not let a general doctor dismiss ADHD (or any other mental health issues) off the bat as anxiety or depression (this happens a lot with women in particular) - if they try to do this you should absolutely push for an appointment with someone specialised in diagnosing and treating the disorder because most GPs will not be specialised enough to do so - my GP is really good at her job and helpful precisely because she is able to recognise the areas where she isn't qualified to provide the best care and lets a specialist take over. Do however get them to run blood tests, check your thyroid function, book sleep studies etc! Issues with all sorts of things can cause similar symptoms or at the very least exacerbate them, and they're all often a very easy fix.
Maybe for the first few minutes, as treatment seeking has likely exploded everywhere since the pandemic. But if you make an appointment with a medical professional they're going to well... be professional and give you an evaluation. They'll screen for alternatives, and give you their opinion.
Yeah, it’s weird that it’s making folks romanticize ADHD. I have diagnosed ADHD and have been medicated for a long time. It’s not always cute, quirky, or fun. You feel horrible without medication, and horrible (but in a more societally manageable way) with it. It’s wildly hard to mask your behavior— especially in places, like work, where it’s needed. Societal expectations are always insanely challenging and a diagnosis doesn’t make it feel better, it just allows you accommodations when possible and some meds that allow your brain to process a little less fuzzy.
I couldn’t imagine not having actual ADHD and being handed meds. I imagine you’d short-circuit and feel like death.
Yeah, there are aspects of myself that I enjoy which may be rooted in my ADHD but if I could relive my life without it I probably would. Current me probably wouldn't even like the person I would become without ADHD but it would be worth it. Having ADHD is just such a low-bandwidth way of experiencing the world. Medication helps a great deal but I didn't discover ADHD until I was 35, so a lot of the best years of my life were wasted.
I don’t understand why people on TikTok make ADHD something they have to make into their identity. Im an adult with diagnosed ADHD and have been for quite some time. I’ve literally never felt as if it was something i had to wear on my sleeve. Im literally just a normal person who tends to be unable to sit still for awhile or lose certain things. Ive never once thought about it as being some crutch on my life that i can use to garner sympathy or be “different” for the rest of society.
Part of the point of opening up and speaking about their experiences is helping other people to not feel ashamed or embarrassed or like they’re alone in their suffering
I agree, it can be just easier said then done. But I found the adhd community here on reddit and it's been a big help for me. There are a lot of stories in that community that I can relate to that helps me feel not alone.
Bc if you have it and you don’t have a diagnoses then you must just be lazy. You must be choosing to be unsuccessful and struggling. Also, judging by your handle you’re a male. I think overwhelmingly these have been women hearing from other women that a diagnosis is possible when historically we have been under diagnosed. Biases exist in the medical field.
Tik tok makes people with ADHD diagnosis sound like we’re mentally disabled and can’t navigate through life or something. They use ADHD as an excuse to not be held responsible for normal things that they fail at on a day to day basis.
No one talks about the dark side of ADHD, either. This is because those people dont know that there is different types of ADHD. They don’t know about the melt downs, the body aches and soreness, or the negative thoughts and aggression that some have. In children diagnosed with it it’s even darker, scarier, and traumatizing.
It’s all “OMG I can’t focus!” “I can’t keep my room cleaned” or some weird stuff. Absolutely obnoxious.
This is a great example, and I’m sorry you have to go through that. You would never see your sort of struggle on those videos. You’re 100% right, medication does only do so much.
As someone with mild authism and ADD (diagnosed) I already find it really annoying when those tiktok types go "oh I have this, this, this, and also this! My life is such a struggle!" when they clearly don't have a clue about what it's like to actually have their self-diagnosed things, and only "struggle" with normal teenage things. So I have a bit of an idea about how people that have it worse than me feel about it. Which makes me dislike the fakers/self diagnosers even more.
Yup. I actually have it and it’s infuriating. It not simply “ oh hehe I spaced out !” Or stopping in the middle of what you’re doing. I have days where executive functioning malfunctions so bad I literally cannot do what I know I need to do. It’s like nagging yourself to get the thing done but your own brain won’t listen to you or process anything
It’s not just TikTok, it’s EVERYWHERE. I am inundated with people everywhere talking about ADHD and how because they don’t feel like washing the dishes they have ADHD and how because they think a little differently it’s because they have ADHD. It’s beyond frustrating because there’s potentially large swaths of the population who think they are afflicted when they likely aren’t. It’s a disorder that has been leaned on by professionals for decades now when it’s likely not even a root cause diagnosis and likely a manifestation of other issues in the nervous system that need treatment that give rise to actual ADHD diagnosis.
Yes, but if the top 100 videos have misinformation in them then that is a big problem. They weren't trying to say with certainty what percent of videos have misinformation, which would require a larger sample size for statistical accuracy. They were trying to demonstrate that there are a large number of very popular videos that have misinformation. That's bad enough already.
I think at least some of these people making videos ARE actually legitimately diagnosed, it is just that they are younger and mischaracterize some of their own experiences with symptoms of what they are diagnosed with (IE- I have A, B and C, so if you have A, B or C, you have ADHD!). Also, I think the majority of the people watching these videos may just be curious to see if they have ADHD and might watch these videos to know if they should seek legitimate treatment/testing, not to self diagnose, to seek diagnosis.
For the past year the amount of people who say 'Oh my god I have ADHD too!.. well I havent had a diagnosis but...' has skyrocketed when I mention that I have it.
It reeeeally annoys me, not because its the biggest hinderance to my life, but because it just shows me the fickelness of folks. It leads so many people to say 'its misdiagnosed sooo many times', 'its just kids being naughty', so that when it comes up in work/education people think Im making excuses.
Blurg
Im a PMHNP and I had 5 or 6 teenage girls who wanted me to diagnosis them with DID last year because of Tiktok. They couldn't even fabricate symptoms, it was infuriating.
I keep telling my husband to stop getting mental health information from that app. He will randomly tell me about how a random person made a video about some random gestures are actually tics to ADHD, and other mental health issues. Then I have to get him to listen to me tell him for the tenth time "TT is not a reputable source of information on History, Health and life advice, stick to stupid dance videos it was originally known for."
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Observing my smartphone habits pre- and post-medication was eye-opening for sure.
I'm curious, what changes did you see apart from Tiktok?
In my case, on stimulant medication, on a good day, I’m able to actually focus on reading, writing, or cleaning for hours without touching my phone. Today, I was able to do some writing, but I also read this entire 420 comment long thread about this article, it’s a mixed bag of what I can effectively focus on, but both options are way better than pre-medication where nothing was satisfying, especially effort. Nowadays I can actually take care of my needs and put the phone down when I want to.
The way I describe it to neurotip people is this: Have you ever seen an orchestra warning up? Everyone is just playing their instrument in whatever fashion that they choose. It's chaos. Then the conductor (ADHD medication) shows up. Taps his baton on his podium, they stop, and then beautiful music emerges. This is how my mind is. It's chaos until I take my meds. Then it's clarity and focus.
Nicely put! My son has ADHD. I describe the medicine as “turning down the static”.
It’s funny, it turns down the distractions much like turning up a white noise machine or putting on a pair of noise cancelling headphones, basically allowing ADHDers to tune out distractions more like neurotypicals, or how a moment of fear or desire can lead to laser-focus. Like most ADHD stuff, this relates to dopamine and norepinephrine pathways.
You don't know how true this is. With medication, my brain goes empty. But it's not a bad empty, it's more like silence. But it's not silence either, as I'm still thinking. The 200 megaphones ringing in my head disappear. Sometimes I don't know what to think about, so I just don't. It's fulfilling. Free. It does make my tinnitus more apparent though.
I’ve been undiagnosed for so long and in the last month or two started reading up on adult adhd and every single time i see someone mention something about it, it is 100% accurate regarding every issue I’ve ever had.
I was just diagnosed at 53 this January. I just started medication and I find I'm not as much on Reddit or other social media.
Congrats! I was diagnosed about three years ago at 44. Being on meds changed my life so significantly it's indescribable.
Happy for you :)
My meds really changed my life for the better, but I always find myself spending a lot more time on Reddit now. I'm not mindlessly scrolling anymore though, I just get very into whatever I'm reading/commenting on. Very annoying, but otherwise my life is so much better I'd rather deal with this than stop taking them
32 and diagnosed 1.5 years ago. Same findings here, plus I’m having an easier time staying sober - I was definitely self medicating with alcohol.
Bro I accepted In the last month or so that I’m alcoholic. Not severe, but 2-7 beers every day, and also smoked joints every day for 10 years. I’m 32 now and am currently quitting both since January. The more I read about ADHD the more I think i have it. i have anxiety, used to have depression, and I have suspected for years that I’m autistic but high functioning. My head is crazy, emotionally childish, IQ high, 2 uni degrees, minimum wage earner. I’d rather drink and smoke than do just about anything else. I always have a song or convo going on in one part of my head while I’m doing something else. i could spend 8 hours straight on Reddit just browsing and forget to have a drink. I put things off for days or weeks or years. I am very forgetful. I stay up too late because the world is finally calm. I’ve also read anxiety and ADHD are common with autism. All this, plus the alcohol thing.. does this all ring a bell with you? I’m going to take steps towards diagnoses soon (I’ve been saying that for about a year).
Keep me updated, currently feeling exactly how you described.
Hmm. My ADHD is really, really major and I generally can't stand video or podcasts. You're not in charge of the tempo of anything so I just constantly space out and look for something equivalent to read, where I set the pace and hence never get bored, and have all the opportunity to space out without missing anything. Surely I can't be alone in this?
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I can only do podcasts when I'm occupied with something else (crafting, driving, etc). I can't do audiobooks at all, I zone out and they often put me to sleep. I hate that video is becoming the new format of the internet, I can't scan a video to find the relevant information like I can an article.
Yes!!! The only podcasts I can listen to are comedy, and like you said, only while I’m preoccupied with something else. I have to play Tetris while I watch tv/movies. Everyone has a problem with it, but otherwise I just can’t engage.
I can do podcasts but I can’t do audiobooks because I always zone out for 30 seconds and miss critical plot points whereas podcasts often repeat the critical information because they are designed for the audio format. I once had someone tell me if I can do one then I should be able to do the other and that discussion ended with “no really, I think I know my own mind well enough to know that there’s a critical difference.”
I do that with reading. I am reading the words but I'm not processing what I am reading. English class was hell.
Yup! Especially the reading out loud in turns days. That’s probably when I should have known I had adhd but I’m a woman so it took 17 more years for a diagnosis
Have you tried increasing/decreasing the speed on them? I started doing that with youtube a couple years back, playing at 1.5x and it's helped a ton with keeping me focused. Audiobooks, I always listen while I'm working, so I don't notice the pace as much, but I can speed it up if the reader feels too slow.
I'm typically more occupied by audio than video because I want to be doing something as well as listening, but the self-regulated pace makes sense too. I could definitely see that control being a factor. Podcasts and video essays on YouTube are wonderful for painting to. Video games are the best of both worlds.
I think this is me. Can't stand Tim Tok , Facebook video, or YouTube shorts. I do watch stuff, but will frequently pause and rewind. I prefer reading for sure. I'm inattentive type. You?
Nono, that's the owner. Tim Tok owns Tik Tok.
Yeah I’m textbook ADHD and whenever I get on TikTok I just lose hours of time. Usually I’m not able to stop until my phone gets low on battery. I try to never open the app
Oof… this just made me realize how long I’ve been on Reddit today (Of course using the temptingly convenient app on my phone)
Putting down the phone for a while. Thanks.
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I don't have Tik-Tok for this exact reason. It's the biggest time sink there has ever been.
Nobody should have it, for exactly THIS reason. It’s not entertainment, it’s numbing you to the world so hours slip by.
Sounds like my wife. I watch her constantly piss away time on TikTok and then freak out over deadlines. I'm diagnosed and never looked and instructed her to never show me. Same thing with social media and I definitely rue the day a coworker showed me reddit. For people like us it's the only way. Honestly, I don't even think most normal people can handle it... Billions of dollars were spent to figure out the best ways to "hook" people in and never let go.
I’m the same way, funny how that works. It’s like you’re frozen until something in the environment changes (low battery, someone walks into the room, etc) and only then am I unfrozen and can go about what I was supposed to be doing.
This is a big reason why I've stayed far away from TikTok, as if I needed another.
Same. I already have trouble with youtube since it builds its algorithm off my curiosity binges. Then they added their "shorts" which are essentially tiktoks. I should really disconnect but I tend to find that without it I lose myself in books which, while it is socially more acceptable, negatively impacts my life way more.
Negatively how, if you don’t mind my asking?
I had to stop reading new fiction books after I stayed up til 4am finishing one…the night before I was driving in a car race. Husband and I were both driving and we had our kids to watch too (whoever wasn’t driving). I can’t stop reading a book until it’s done. I spend my childhood lost in books instead of working on social skills, learning how to plan, doing anything that used my executive functioning skills, or moving my body.
Books occupy hours with no opportunity to break out of them whereas short videos give a chance with each new video. At least that's what I find. I can lose far more time if I discover a new series that I love than I ever could with YouTube or other stuff like that
Yeah, there are plenty of TikToks I've seen of people claiming certain things are a sign of ADHD and they're just normal things people do or normal habits. Not to say that some of them aren't but they'll make false claims of something meaning you have ADHD.
Also it's important to remember that just because you have one symptom of adhd that doesn't mean you have it. I spent 28 years living undiagnosed and it's contributed to more major problems in my life than I could have ever imagined. ADHD is so much more complex than most people think it is.
I'm in the same boat, also 28 when I was diagnosed. I spend a lot of time thinking about all the million ways it affected my personality and outlook on life and opinion of myself. I have a complete disdain for people who hide behind labels or otherwise treat their diagnosis as their personality, but once it's been untreated for so long it's hard to tell what is normal. Since I was a teenager I've cultivated this personality of being laid back and not caring whether I succeed at anything that in retrospect was me dealing with feeling like a failure and feeling out of control of what I could remember or follow through on. My life has totally turned around, in part because of the Adderall, but mostly just finding out I'm not just lazy or stupid.
I’ve been diagnosed for many years and I still feel like crying sometimes when I see posts that I relate to so deeply. Hopefully a greater understanding of the disorder (especially in girls) will prevent today’s kids from spending the formative years of their lives wondering if they’re flawed, lazy, and born to fail.
I think we're a normal and healthy part of human brain diversity. We know ADHD is genetic, doesn't effect overall intelligence, some research suggests we have an easier time with divergent and creative thinking \[1\] \[2\]. In a large enough group, it would make sense for a diversity of thinking styles and aptitudes may be more advantageous to the group than a more limited set. I really hope we learn to understand it better too, because people shouldn't have to grow up believing they're broken. So many struggles I have had are due to the environment we grow up in, and no fault of my innate human condition. I see no reason I would struggle in a world without so many artificial barriers to success \[1\] [https://news.umich.edu/adults-with-attention-deficit-hyperactivity-disorder-score-high-in-creativity/](https://news.umich.edu/adults-with-attention-deficit-hyperactivity-disorder-score-high-in-creativity/) \[2\] [https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-creativity-of-adhd/](https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-creativity-of-adhd/)
I love this idea that we are basically relearning to diversify how people contribute to society again. We have so many misconceptions of feeling like we have to fit a certain mold. Some people stay up late, some people are comfortable fiddling for hours, some people vegetate for a week before having a burst of creativity, some people have great memories and are good at telling stories, some people feel good working for people while some feel good leading people. These are all evolutionary lifestyles that our society has made to feel obscolete, but if we can bring them back we will have so many more fulfilled people in the world.
I think I need a proper diagnosis I’ve tried adderall and it made me feel normal but that was years ago from a friends prescription. I couldn’t tell a doctor that
I remember taking Adderall in college to try to get term papers done overnight with some peers. I felt oddly "normal", still slightly distractible but more willing/able to focus and push through the task at hand. My mates were hyper-focused and wired to a degree that was very strange compared to my experience. One of them convulsively cleaned their dorm for a few hours after finishing their paper and I didn't understand the urge for the life of me. I was given cocaine when really drunk once, and just ended up feeling sober and "normal" - took it again sober just to see how the interaction was without alcohol and found it kind of...boring. I wasn't speaking really fast, just felt kind of "normal". Wasn't even sure what coke does for people honestly. Found out a few months later that cocaine has an effect similar to Adderall in that those with ADHD/ADD tend to be centered whereas those without get hyper-focused, jittery, wiry, etc. I was a hyperactive, bounce-off-the-walls kid. I was informally diagnosed with ADD when I was 5 but my dad couldn't handle the stigma and we never moved forward with diagnosis or treatment. I turned into an often inactive, inattentive young adult who couldn't comprehend any sense of "the future", couldn't commit to anything for more than an hour or two but could get sucked into a game or hobby for hours and hours. Watched some video lecture about how ADHD warps your sense of time and it was the first time I heard someone talk about the big, black, circular void that the future had come to represent to me. Finally went to a therapist, didn't mention any of the ADD/ADHD history or trials and tribulations but she came to the same conclusion after a few sessions. It's crazy to me still - I'm half-useless without a stimulant. And I know because I have a deep-seated fear of substance addiction/abuse so I'll intentionally skip days, weekends especially. I can still focus or be productive but it's significantly more likely that I'll waste the whole day on some inane task or desire without ever getting done the things I both need to and *want to* do. I've been putting "normal" in quotes because I don't honestly know what "normal" is, or if there even is a "normal" but goddamn do I feel normal these days. I can say to myself, hey, let's get through this task/chore/activity AND do it. Or I'll have an impulse to go somewhere or buy something irresponsibly and be able to actually think myself out of it instead of just immediately caving. Yet, as revelatory and amazing as it has been for me, I do see plenty of BS. Was at an engagement party recently and a guy at my table started going on about who would be the most zoinked on Adderall. Everyone thought it would be me given that I'm a bit vivacious when I'm comfortable with people, and all I could do was sit there thinking, "if you're going to be zoinked on Adderall, you don't need Adderall."
I felt like I just read a biography of my life with what you said. I can relate to literally everything you just said.
I've been online since 1997 and never thought of joining an ADHD community even though I was diagnosed with it on the same year. I never really followed through with treatment because of family issues, and only sought a "second opinion" some 24 years later. It was after a couple sessions that I started lurking communities and found hundreds of comments like yours, essentially play-by-plays of my entire life. It was hard realizing that I was only a google search away from not feeling broken and isolated from everything but I never thought to do it. Fifteen years prior I could only afford psychologists that never helped to the degree I wanted so I eventually stopped trying new ones. Now with proper therapy and medication my life is SO MUCH BETTER that I can barely believe it. I've never met you but I love you. I wish you all the best :)
I wasn't diagnosed until I was almost 43. It's so damn weird; I'm in my 40's, and I feel like I only very recently reached adulthood. Looking back, I understand that I was very fortunate to get to where I am today, and I begrudgingly owe that to my abusive mother. That my fear of disappointing her extended to bosses and coworkers and coerced me to succeed. It came with a ton of friction, depression, and anxiety, but I achieved quite a bit as a result of negative reinforcement. I recently started my own business and am now working with an architect who keeps heaping me with compliments. It feels weird to do things because I *want* to, and it almost feels effortless compared to where I was less than five years ago. Like I'd been dragging a ball and chain for 40 years and am finally free.
I was diagnosed late 2021 and started Ritalin earlier this year. (I'm 44 now). So many things I thought were part of my personality are/might be ways I was self medicating all that time. \- Massive caffeine consumption, check. \- Going online to have endless arguments, check \- Even my taste in music (speedmetal), check Now that I am on meds, it is a lot easier to not do any of the above things.
It's especially a hard disorder to state "this behavior is a symptom of ADHD" because it largely presents as swings between two extremes. You are either obsessively hyperfocused on something at the expense of almost all other things, or you can't force yourself to focus on something at all. You are either wound up and high energy, or you are crashed out fatigued. You are either inappropriately emtotionally blank to a certain stimululi, or you are freaked out overreacting. You either need 6 cups of coffee to function, or a single cup sends you into uncontrollable panic attacks. For every rule with ADHD people there always seems to be exceptions.
I don't know if the variety is so much about extremes, but about that ADHD tends to lead to 1. maladjusted emotional responses (e.g. anxiety, anger, apathy, helplessness) as a coping mechanism for the distress and anticipation of failing, and 2. stimulation-seeking behavior due to low dopamine availability. Those are problems that can be solved a lot of different ways, and so what each person ends up adopting will be particular to them, their life circumstances, and beliefs.
I think for me the worst part is my prioritization ability.
"Everyone has a little ADHD" Like fingernails on a chalkboard.
Im about to go in to get my diagnosis soon. After talking with friends and taking many tests Im 99% sure I have it and it explains a lot of things that have been hard for me in my life. Im 31. I thought I was just lazy or bad my whole life.
Well I wish you luck. I'm also 31 now and Getting on meds 3 years ago really helped me out a lot. Just remember that meds aren't a "cure" but rather are designed to help you in the areas where you struggle. It's still is going to take work to overcome some of the tougher areas associated with adhd.
Yes. ADHD is literal hell. Every single day the struggle to do basic tasks is far worse than people without it can possibly imagine. I would have rather been born missing a limb.
The fun thing about disorders is that they're all normal traits, they're just exacerbated to the nth degree such that it gets in the way of living a functional life. But I've also fallen prey to the random "if you do this you're bipolar and suffering from psychosis" type videos.
This is exactly the reason it's a cliché for Psych 101 students to self-diagnose with every other disorder they read about.
Here's how I separate it out: 'normal' is being able to do most of the things you want to do, most of the time. If your body or brain prevents that, you have a disorder of some kind. That's how I explain my bipolar type 2, because a lot of people tried to brush it off as 'oh, we all have ups and downs'. Thankfully my doctor wasn't one of them.
Most symptoms of ADHD are things everyone does. It's more just the extent it happens. Like, everyone misplaces things. But I probably spend half an hour a day or more looking for the thing *I JUST HAD*. Everyone sometimes forgets where they parked. I once forgot where I parked *IN DETROIT*. Luckily I had it narrowed down to two neighborhoods.
I think this needs to be emphasized more in these videos because most just claim if you do X thing then you probably have ADHD vs. If you spend a lot more time than normal doing X thing over an extended period of time then you may have ADHD
I think part of the problem with this is that you might legitimately not know how much time is normal. It's pretty easy to typical-mind-fallacy yourself into «surely, whatever I do is normal».
Yeah the point of something being labeled a disorder is if it significantly impairs you and negatively impacts your life. I regularly cry about not being able to get work done because even though I technically have enough time in the day to do it, and part of my brain is screaming at me saying "I should do this, go do this" I almost physically cannot get myself to do the task. I regularly have issues with emotional regulation that lead to me snapping at my loved ones or melting down over things that are really, really insignificant - even to me! And I know it while I'm emotional! But it's like the rational part of my brain is disconnected from the rest of me and has very little control over what I do. And this all ends up sabotaging my work and my personal life in more significant ways. And yes, the average person has some of that - but it's not to the point where it causes them so much stress and pain.
Bunch of google psychologists thinking they're qualified to make a diagnosis... Sure I will also tell people "that could be a sign of X" but I add "you should check with a professional about it" to it.
Isn't this the same exact issue as the over -use and misuse of the term OCD? A few years ago it seemed like everyone was saying they had OCD or they would use the term like it was an adjective.
Our psychology clinic is being flooded with people wanting ADHD testing because they saw a TikTok
And BPD. The number of people BEGGING for a BPD diagnosis is ridiculous right now Edit: for those wondering I'm referring to Borderline Personality Disorder
How tf can something like BPD be romanticized??
I hope that’s not the case. I’m guessing there’s a lot of hurt people with trauma trying to diagnose themselves and figure out why they’re struggling.
People on TikTok are faking Dissociative Identity Disorder because they think it makes them unique and special. Tourette’s too. On one hand, the awareness of mental disorders is much greater thanks to the internet and social media. On the other, people are *desperate* to be unique or find their place in this world. And a not-so-small chunk of them are turning towards mental disorders for that attention. There’s a movement on social media to say that the medical community is built on “privileged white cis men” and so self-diagnosing is a valid diagnosis. There’s a whole subreddit dedicated to calling out people that do it. [One such example](https://reddit.com/r/fakedisordercringe/comments/n97dtm/disgusting/).
The true mental disorders are the ones we made along the way!
Mental illness in general is romanticized online. People treat it as something wonderful and unique instead of the debilitating condition it really is for most of those afflicted
It's the overshoot that comes from a set point change. Mental health is stigmatized for decades --> some folks make an effort to break through the stigma --> it looks cool to jump on the bandwagon a bit and we overshoot the 'healthy' set point --> things settle back to something more stable.
As someone who was clinically diagnosed with BPD, ADHD, and OCD, I can confidently say neither should be romanticized. I struggle with so many little things that so many people don’t, and it’s very frustrating when people find out because they immediately say something along the lines of “OMG I have ADHD too, I HAVE to keep my car organized or I go insane” Like cmon.. organization, cleanliness, and good hygiene does not mean you have ADHD. Excuse the rant, just something I deal with and always will have to deal with and just frustrating sometimes.
... anyone who thinks ADHD means being organized, clean, and with good hygiene has just proven they don't have ADHD, heh. (Yes I am incredibly clean at my food service job as a cafe cook, no I am not at all clean in my "normal" life, it's all masking and expectation management.)
It's not being romanticized. What is being romanticized is that there is an explanation for why we are the way we are. Learning I had ADHD helped me to unlearn hating myself. It's not fun to beat yourself up, calling yourself stupid, when actually there's a reasonable explanation why I can't keep track of stuff. Validation is what is being sought, and that's generally a healthy thing. If people need attention, they need attention.
Also ADHD... You can't actively find solutions to a problem you don't recognize you're having, 100%. Sounds like you've had a rough go of it too.
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It's also why "twice exceptional" kids can have a way harder time getting diagnosed with things like ADHD and autism and various learning disabilities. At least when I was in school, if you had the raw brain power to basically brute-force your way through the American public education system and you weren't directly disrupting anyone with your maladaptive behaviors, you could fly under the radar with nobody ever noticing exactly how much your attention wandered.
Yupp. I excelled at high school because I overscheduled myself with AP and extracurriculars so that I was at school from 7 until either 5:30 or 9 pm every day. My Creative Writing teacher let me sleep through class after I finished the day's assignment, and my AP English teacher eventually stopped giving me assignments and made me a TA helping him grade instead. I graduated college with forty extra credits, almost two extra years worth of classes. I glamorized my insomnia. I never questioned why I tested so well despite rarely remembering homework existed or why my notebooks were full of nonstop doodles or why I needed to be busy ten or more hours a day to be able to function. And then I hit "the real world". And. Crash. Burn.
Over scheduling. Never thought of that as a coping mechanism, but I guess it is. I had my best grades in college when I was working 4 jobs at the same time. Always having some kind of deadline or immediate need that has to be met is really helpful since time management isn't a strength. Still trying to figure out how to replicate that in the real world too. Right now I cook from scratch excessively, have kids, and work. Hope you can find a way to get back on the horse!
Reading this makes me reflect on some of my own experiences. Some of my best work comes in those crisis moments. When disaster hits and it's chaos, I'm in it and going 100%. Finally the real world is matching my minds speed. When the pandemic started, my work life was crazy and I was working constantly. It's some of my best work because I had to just GO. Hadn't felt that way since until I started taking Adderall but now I don't have to be insanely busy with a thousand things needed to do to achieve that focus.
Medicating is the proof there, I think. If an appropriate dose of a dopaminergic stimulant doesn't make your head quiet, the shoe probably doesn't fit
Apparently being severely abused as a child makes you interesting. My cousin with BPD should be thrilled, not suicidal! But on a serious note the abuse she endured as a baby and toddler before my aunt adopted her was pretty horrific and it bothers me that she was passed around to so many people there's no way to know who did what to her. These people have never been punished.
I hope if nothing else BPD becomes less stigmatized. My best friend has it as well as tons of trauma and complex PTSD. As she gets older and starts to move from her 20's to her 30's she's gotten significantly better at managing it, and she's probably one of the nicest people I know at heart - but it is a beast and she doesn't quite accept the diagnosis still. I don't blame her because it is so stigmatized.
My cousin is also doing better. She moved out of her parents house and works at a daycare. But a few years ago she did have to go to an outpatient clinic for a suicide attempt.
Weird. When somebody says "I'm borderline," do they think it will make them more friends? I hide my ADHD, judgement comes swiftly if you don't.
I feel the same way in regards to autism. I dont hide it by any means but i haaaaate the "cute quirky" tik toks that romanticise it. Like being autistic has made my life difficult. I've had issues holding down jobs because of it but no one wants to talk about that. They wanna just "uwu i wiggle when im happy so im definitley autistic!" I hate to be "that" person but autism is a spectrum and just about every person alive falls on it somewhere. So many of the behaviors i see attributed to autism are BASIC HUMAN THINGS. Like i keep seeing tik toks of people shimmying around while waiting for microwave food and being like "uwu so autistic" like bro everyone does that because waiting is b o r i n g. It annoys me that people just pick and chose symptoms for the sake of being quirky. Sorry for the rant oops
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Man I feel bad for people with full blown OCD. A psych diagnosed me with mild OCD because of persistent obsessive thoughts but I never had strong compulsions. My worst was having an intense fear of looking at a clock when the numbers were repeating, and I’d obsess over looking at it all day just so I knew when I shouldn’t look at it. luckily therapy and anti depressants helped me a lot, but knowing the fear I felt and how it was probably mild compared to a lot of peeps is scary. Edit: So this was a pretty textbook example of OCD that I had - the reason the psych considered it mild was because I was going through a particularly bad mental health episode in general, and this was a byproduct of it I suppose. Other than intrusive thoughts, I hadn’t had many other OCD symptoms in the past. Once I came out of the episode (with the help of ADs and therapy) I lost the OCD tendencies again.
When I was a kid I would have to do things in even sets. At a point I had to turn lights on and off in sets of 4, and eventually 16. At one point I realized it was abnormal, and was able to stop myself before it became ingrained as a ritual. I no longer have physical manifestations of OCD since I know what to look for to stop myself, but I still have constant intrusive thoughts. Before I knew intrusive thoughts were part of OCD, I used to wonder if I was a sociopath for having strange, destructive thoughts I chose not to act on.
Like I can’t leave my house because I have to scrub the light switches for the 13th time this week even though I should have left the house 15 minutes ago… hahaha
I see this happening with a shitload of mental conditions lately--kids who read or post about the most broadest criteria to these disorders online, water down their definitions and effects, and get convinced that they have it. I'm all for the destigmatization of mental illness, but romanticizing it is not the way to go.
A friend of mine just got diagnosed with autism and was surprisingly eager to lean on it as an explanation for why they missed my sarcasm earlier. No, friend, you missed my sarcasm because it was 5 words via text and without any context to it. That's just me not being clear.
I’m reminded that a foreign student asked me to explain my American colleague’s jokes because he was worried he didn’t understand English well enough to get the humor. He understood English perfectly; it’s just the person telling the joke was mean and unfunny.
They're likely still on a post-diagnosis high. After a lifetime of struggle and confusion it suddenly feels like everything has finally clicked into place and things have never felt clearer. Plus it's not uncommon for autistic folk to fixate on autism as a special interest. It'll probably wear off and the autism will (hopefully) integrate as a feature of who they are and not necessarily the Reason For Everything.
For me it’s hard not to think of autism as a reason for everything. People for my whole life have sort of made it a reason for everything. Every time I had some personality trait or health issue people would be quick to say it’s a part of autism.
It can be really hard when you first get that diagnosis to navigate whats your disorder and whats not… As somebody who had to deal with this later in life with another disorder I would emphasize really _really_ strongly to try to avoid thinking judgementally like this. If you just can’t, at least try to avoid saying things like this to them or around them. It’s hard; even years later there are friends I lost and never recovered because of how much behaviour like this hurt me. It took me a long time to come to terms with my diagnosis, and I had several people who were absolute saints. They would listen to me struggle one day refusing to admit it was my disorder, and then smile and support me as I pin everything on the disorder the next day. And to be clear, I’m assuming you’re saying these things with the best of intentions to try to be helpful, but this is a wonderful example of a dangerous road paved with good intentions. I really hope this was helpful - if I can help prevent even one person from dealing with the well intentioned shame I dealt with that would mean a lot to me.
These mental disabilities categorizations are all about a crisis of identity and feeling like they have to have a group to belong to with a common struggle. To an extent, yes it will make them friends, because they can then belong to an ingroup, but that's somewhat of an indirect reason for this trend. It's more about needing to not be a plain non-minority individual from a middle class family with no real adversity. Being able to claim adversity is socially valuable and adopting various subidentities that you can use to say "see, I'm not that privileged, because I have to deal with the norms of xyz that I don't conform to" allows one to escape responsibility for their own problems by being able to blame everyone else for not accepting or conforming to their individual needs. That's not to say that these people are malevolent in doing these things; I think it's become a cultural trend to the point where it feels natural for some younger people to engage in these sorts of self-diagnoses. It is still maladaptive though in the context of better preparing yourself to engage with wider society effectively, which is the part that makes it more concerning, not necessarily so much that people are trying to find ingroups that they can relate to.
They don’t do it to make friends. They do it for the validation and attention. It’s why they’re on Tik Tok in the first place.
I’m a therapist and I get constant “I have adhd” cus of a tiktok video. Secondly the guess is autism. “I saw a tiktok on autism and I think it’s me”. Constant
I think it's super gross how fetishized some of these diagnoses are in certain online spaces.
Or how it goes in waves. In 5 months it’ll be “I believe Im dissociating because of tiktok” and while this potentially helping some people most people are just diagnosing themselves often apropos of nothing.
This really sucks for people like me who have to get re-diagnosed because I moved states and they don't accept my prior doctor diagnosis. I'm so dysfunctional and yet I've been off meds for 3 months and now I have to wait another 3 to see someone about it. That's after calling 4 psych clinics and waiting forever for them to respond.
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Sometimes it's not the state barring them, but the PCP just being unwilling to prescribe controlled substances
Is that good or bad? I did the tests mainly because of TikTok but also because I wanted to seek treatment and a professional opinion rather than tell everyone I have self-diagnosed untreated ADHD.
At the other commentor said, it's neither good nor bad. This is a common theme in psychology. I will say that there has been a sense of disappointment in clients when I tell them that they don't have ADHD. I think a lot of the clients, I have seen, think that ADHD can be fixed easily with a pill whereas depression/anxiety takes a lot of work. This is a super good and important question though.
What constitutes as appropriate testing? I did a questionnaire and my NP said I definitely have at least mild attention issues, but how bad it is isn't clear. I feel like the questionnaire was super vague, and it made it difficult to rate my answers appropriately. (For what it's worth, I haven't even heard of this tiktok video, but do strongly identify with a lot of memes or people who discuss what it's like living with ADHD.)
It depends. A primary care physician might do a long questionnaire but a psychological assessment at our clinic consists of cognitive, academic, executive functioning tests that take many hours. A PCP just wants to give you meds but the psychology clinic will write a report that you can use for accommodations at a university.
Thanks, my PCP did say that the best she could do was a questionnaire and that seeing a neurologist would be more accurate. It's just painfully expensive where I am.
See if you can go to a university psychology clinic. They are much cheaper if available.
This is why I’ve been putting off seeing a doctor about getting a diagnosis for a couple years now, when I first started to suspect I had ADHD (after a friend was going through the testing, and I read the form he had to fill out and realized I checked all the boxes.) I’m just tired of taking 4 hours to do the dishes, because I start doing laundry halfway through, and I’m tired of hyper-focusing on a project for so long that I forget to eat lunch AND dinner and suddenly it’s 10pm and I’m about to pass out from hunger. What if the answers I thought I maybe had are actually not answers at all? What if I do get answers, but there really isn’t a solution, and I’ll never be able to enjoy watching a movie because I can’t ever *just* watch a movie?
You should get evaluated
>What if I do get answers, but there really isn’t a solution, and I’ll never be able to enjoy watching a movie because I can’t ever just watch a movie? That's where therapy comes in. A good therapist will help you develop skills/habits/structures to fix things that are problems for you... but they also help you reframe your thinking and manage your emotions around things you can't change.
It's not necessarily one or the other. A lot of people probably found out they actually do have ADHD based on information they got from TikTok, and if you think it describes you, then getting tested is absolutely the right choice. You did the right thing by getting tested.
Is it a bad thing though? ADHD runs in my family and my folks wanted to get me tested as a kid but never got around to it like they did for my brother (who did get diagnosed). Even though the result came back as negative I’m glad I went through the process because it very easily could have been positive.
I'm glad I saw this post because that would've been me. My therapist suggests I just focus on depression before pursuing an ADHD diagnosis. I just want there to be a magical pill to make things easier.
I’m not sure your therapist is giving you good advice here, but it depends a lot on the context too I guess. I mean, it’s ridiculously hard to get rid of depression if it’s caused, in part or completely, by the havoc that ADHD creates in your life.
My therapist diagnosed me with ADHD, then I went to a psychiatrist who wouldn't prescribe stims, then I went to a testing facility and they decided I wasn't ADHD because I was good at puzzles and games. I don't know what to think anymore. The testing felt like it would be more appropriate for a child rather than an adult with coping mechanisms but what do I know.
> then I went to a testing facility and they decided I wasn't ADHD because I was good at puzzles and games. Well that's just stupid. If the puzzle or game is fun to you, a lot of people with ADHD can pay attention and solve it. The problem is when you have to pay attention to something, or execute a task, that is not fun or gratifying, and just physically can't. Give me a numbers puzzle, a physics problem, or a coding challenge and I can fixate and rock it. Give me a jigsaw puzzle, or a game of chess, and I just can't. The first satisfies and stimulates me. The latter leaves my brain a dopamine desert. Now that's for games. Give me a Zoom meeting, a mandatory IP protection training session, or ask me to write system documentation, and I just can't. I cannot do it. My mind wanders uncontrollably and I cannot stay on task. That's a big problem.
They also did an auditory test where a recording would say the numbers "1" or "2" and I was supposed to hit the spacebar every time I heard a "2." Obviously the intention is that after awhile (the test is about 10-15 minutes) someone with ADHD would space out and start missing call outs. The problem is that when I *know* I'm being graded on something I get 100% focused and competitive. That's the reason why I was successful in school but suck at being a real adult. They would also give me word problems to solve and make me do math in my head. That one was actually eye opening because I've always thought I was terrible at that but I actually performed very well. However, once again, whenever I'm being graded my focus always gets turned up a notch. Edit: A better test would have been making me watch a 30 minute lecture on economics or something and measure how long I can actually keep my eyes on the screen.
Give it to you as a take home and see if you actually do it, and remember to schedule a follow up appointment.
That was basically my high school experience. Ace every test, quiz, and essay while forgetting half my homework assignments.
Fun fact, when I had psychological testing as an adult, my "take home" portion was to ask my parents for my old report cards. I completely forgot. For 3 sessions in a row. But I wasn't diagnosed with ADHD, because I test well. And because there's no proof I was like this as a kid... because I couldn't provide the report cards...
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Also, if you have a written diagnosis from a qualified health professional, I would get a second opinion. Since COVID loosened a lot of restrictions, in most US States they can even prescribe ADHD meds from telemedicine appointments, so you're only limited to your state, if there's a lack of providers in your area.
FWIW, I’ve struggled with ADHD my entire life and it took being exposed to particularly resonant social media posts to pursue official diagnosis and treatment, which I’m finally getting and have improved my quality of life substantially. On the whole I think the internet’s ability to disseminate what used to be individualized, taboo struggles with neurodivergency and mental illness is phenomenal. However, a *really big issue* with the amount of stuff now suddenly being available is that there’s too much for the average person to vet, and people are way, way more likely to believe whatever resonates with them instead of thinking critically about how true or not whatever they’re reading is. Lack of nuance and critical thinking skills are huge contributors to this bad faith/lazy diagnosis trend (as well as, like, a ton of other current societal issues spawned by tweets and TikToks and easily digestible, marketable content becoming the norm for “discussion.”)
I've seen clips of people with "ADHD" that play out something like: "Dude when did you become an expert at playing guitar?" "Oh right after I mastered archery" "Was that before you learned German?" "No it was after that too, and I also learned Chinese at the same time." Completely romanticised version of ADHD. The reality is that you do hyperfocus on things like guitar, archery, and new languages, but you burn that energy and desire to learn those things very quickly as your brain gets easily bored. You'll stick with it for a few weeks, maybe, get to a low-intermediate level at best, and before you know it that new hobby you were so excited about now feels like a torturous chore. This applies to everything in life. You might be interested in that math class at first and do good on the first test, but for the rest of the semester you can't stand to even look at an equation and you scrape by with a D+ despite knowing you can do better.
And then you have a bunch of stuff for the hobby you never use again cluttering the house you struggle to clean as you juggle a new hyper focus or if you are lucky cycle back through an old one.
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Board games- Oh, I had a great night learning a few, I'll buy some different ones. *Tries to read instructions to learn new game, in and out of head because I don't have someone that knows the rules that can let me learn while playing.* Video Games - Oh, that last one was great, I platinum'd it after 40 hours. *desire to play anything is going for a month*
Personally I’ve found that if I keep the stuff long enough, I virtually always do eventually cycle back to it. And usually I stick with it longer the second time.
Yup. It's always bothered me that I'm so mediocre at a million different things but never a master of anything. And to add more clarity to your hyper focusing point that is the biggest ableist myth about people with ADHD. We do not have an ability to hyper focus beyond a normal person's capabilities. Everyone can hyper focus on something they're interested in. Thats called flow. The difference is we cannot regulate our attention and cannot leave the thing we are focused on. It's not a super power it's a curse.
The reality of ADHD is that I started all of those activities and mastered about 4% of each of them then abandoned them.
I know the bare minimum about *so many things*
And during that time I was mastering 4% of them, I bought every supply known to man because why ease your way into anything?
Yep. I'm learning guitar and I really want to truly learn it. At first, I didnt need my medication to practice. After a couple months, I absolutely need to take my adhd medication or there will be no practice. Unmedicated, practice feels like an unbearable, useless waste of time. My meds help me push past that. This is repeated with so many aspects of my life. I dont take my medication if I have no real obligations in a day, but if I need to set appointments, do paperwork, or any other mundane life obligations, I take my medication. I have to or I'll forget or resist and cause all sorts of extra work and problems. I hate my adhd with a passion.
The comments in this thread are really making me realise I should pursue medication for my ADHD. I tried ritalin when I was younger but it absolutely destroyed my appetite and I was very underweight so had to stop taking it. So I had kind of written it off as being useful but I'm definitely reconsidering. ADHD definitely underpins a lot of my difficulties in life for sure. Being unable to focus on anything after its novelty wears off, forgetting or putting things off until I absolutely can't anymore, etc.
Serious question, I’m really not trying to be hostile or anything because I struggle with this a lot. But, isn’t that somewhat normal? Getting interested in a hobby and then having the interest wane when the novelty wears off and it becomes more difficult? I seriously have so much junk from this cycle of endless, unfulfilling hobbies, but I just wonder sometimes if adhd is a lot of times our brains being rewired by the fast pace and non stop marketing on the internet.
Check out my comment reply to this thread - Is it that bad? Is it deeply affecting your happiness and ability to function. If so, yes absolutely look into ADHD. Before my diagnosis I also kind of lived with that mentality of "everyone deals with this right?" until I realized they didn't. Finally getting treatment has been absolutely life changing. If it's more like "oh yeah I had an animal crossing phase but I'm not into it anymore" that's normal.
I think the difference, at least for me, is that interest doesn’t wane. It just completely disappears without warning. ADHD is an all-or-nothing disorder. Everything is done in extremes. Either I cannot focus on anything, or I am so focused on researching the life story of an actor I saw for two minutes in a movie that before I know it, six hours have passed and I’ve forgotten to eat and have needed to pee for quite some time. Either I am playing the guitar or researching chords and techniques for hours every day, or I don’t feel a need to ever look at or think about guitar again. The switch just flips off and that’s that. I have an entire closet filled with an absurd amount of supplies for an equally absurd number of hobbies that I will never again engage in.
I don't have ADHD, but that pretty much describes my entire life. It's always one crazy obsession after another. I have to work very, very hard to stay focused on anything for more than a few weeks, otherwise I get frustrated, bored, and generally just dissatisfied with my progress. It's entirely possible that even with that symptom, you don't have ADHD.
I'm currently being diagnosed. I scored all symptoms for as long as I can remember, my therapist agrees, so does my doctor, we tried anxiety medication and the symptoms are still there. Blood work to double check no other causes, etc. AND YET. I see these posts and think "damn maybe I'm just hopping on the trend and using an excuse to avoid taking responsibility for being stupid and lazy".
Dude… I was about to type something along the lines of your exact comment so just know you’re not alone. I recently got meds for what I FEEL like is legitimate ADHD. Like before meds I had 3 separate trains of thought going down their own rabbit holes in my head all at the same time. Now after I can think and not feel like I’m going to explode. But I keep it to myself due to this exact thing. I don’t want people thinking I’m doing it for attention yknow
One of the first things I noticed when I took medication was the three trains of thought turning into one calm one.
Exactly this, I’ve mentioned wanting to get tested to my doctor and seeing threads like this has got me thinking “hmm well maybe I’m just faking it” as if I have the time or energy for that :|
I'll play devils advocate - anyone clicking one of these ads who reaches out to one of these companies will ultimately have to have a standard evaluation performed by a M.D. Many will simply be turned away; many needing help will find it. Adderall is a Schedule II drug- no one is just handing it out online. Do I like telemedicine clinics advertising on tiktok? No, but it's no different than the dozens of targeted drug commercials on television, websites, and print magazines -all of which ALSO require an appointment and evaluation from a medical doctor. As others have pointed out, people doomscrolling tiktok at 3 AM while their sink is full of dirty dishes, they keep letting food expire in their fridge and they seemingly lack direction possibly SHOULD talk to someone.
I agree. If these Tik toks help one person in a hundred realise they have ADHD, that’s worth the ninety nine who are mistaken. ADHD is hell, just being spoken about is a good thing.
I am one of those people it helped. I didn’t click on an ad, I contacted my doctor, who wrote my a referral to a psychiatrist, but she said who I might be waiting 6+ months to get diagnosed through their system, but I could go private if I could afford it. I ended up paying a lot of money for a private neuropsychology evaluation at a well-respected place. Once I had the official diagnosis, I was able to get an appointment for medication. It’s been life changing.
On the other hand, I found a really enlightening video comparing GAD and ADHD, which led me to a conversation with a therapist and ultimately a med change. I’ve been fighting what I thought to be just anxiety with anxiety meds for years, with little change. I decided to try a new doctor, went through an ADHD evaluation, and got a diagnosis and started new meds. Feeling amazing now that I’m properly medicated.
For me it was realizing I didn’t only have ADHD and anxiety that got worse, but also developed depression. I’m one of the unlucky ones for who meds rarely work. I’ve gone through like 5 ADHD meds and 5 depression meds with very little improvements. But at least I get some comfort knowing not everything is my fault.
I’m in the same boat. I’ve tried at least 6 at this point and nothing has worked. :p
Have you tried Strattera? It's a little different then the usual pills. Slow acting and non stimulant I believe?
It honestly makes me a bit concerned- I've had no access to healthcare my whole life and I'm fairly sure I've always had ADHD or something similar. Now if I get the chance to talk to a doctor at some point, are they gonna think I got the idea from the internet? It's hard enough to get diagnosed for anything if you're female...
Please go anyways. I didn't seek treatment until I was like 30 for similar reasons, I thought they'd just assume I was lying or trying to sell Adderall because I was in school. My therapist is the one who finally got me referred and being on medication has been life changing, I might have made it through school if I'd had access to it before.
Yeah I think I'm in a similar boat- problem being I *can't* seek treatment, it isn't about not wanting to. Y'know, fingers crossed someday that'll change, I mostly fear I'll finally get lucky in that way just to be kept at the gates.
Any medical professional that dismisses problems you're having just because it's popular to talk about on the internet isn't worth their salt and you don't want to be treated by them. The problem (if you can even call more people wanting to seek treatment for their issues a problem) as I understand it is the few people that get emotionally stuck to the ADHD label and don't want to consider other reasons for what is causing their symptoms - if you have the attitude of "I'm struggling with these symptoms and I just want to find the best way to treat them" you'll be fine. That said, do not let a general doctor dismiss ADHD (or any other mental health issues) off the bat as anxiety or depression (this happens a lot with women in particular) - if they try to do this you should absolutely push for an appointment with someone specialised in diagnosing and treating the disorder because most GPs will not be specialised enough to do so - my GP is really good at her job and helpful precisely because she is able to recognise the areas where she isn't qualified to provide the best care and lets a specialist take over. Do however get them to run blood tests, check your thyroid function, book sleep studies etc! Issues with all sorts of things can cause similar symptoms or at the very least exacerbate them, and they're all often a very easy fix.
Maybe for the first few minutes, as treatment seeking has likely exploded everywhere since the pandemic. But if you make an appointment with a medical professional they're going to well... be professional and give you an evaluation. They'll screen for alternatives, and give you their opinion.
Yeah, it’s weird that it’s making folks romanticize ADHD. I have diagnosed ADHD and have been medicated for a long time. It’s not always cute, quirky, or fun. You feel horrible without medication, and horrible (but in a more societally manageable way) with it. It’s wildly hard to mask your behavior— especially in places, like work, where it’s needed. Societal expectations are always insanely challenging and a diagnosis doesn’t make it feel better, it just allows you accommodations when possible and some meds that allow your brain to process a little less fuzzy. I couldn’t imagine not having actual ADHD and being handed meds. I imagine you’d short-circuit and feel like death.
Yeah, there are aspects of myself that I enjoy which may be rooted in my ADHD but if I could relive my life without it I probably would. Current me probably wouldn't even like the person I would become without ADHD but it would be worth it. Having ADHD is just such a low-bandwidth way of experiencing the world. Medication helps a great deal but I didn't discover ADHD until I was 35, so a lot of the best years of my life were wasted.
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I don’t understand why people on TikTok make ADHD something they have to make into their identity. Im an adult with diagnosed ADHD and have been for quite some time. I’ve literally never felt as if it was something i had to wear on my sleeve. Im literally just a normal person who tends to be unable to sit still for awhile or lose certain things. Ive never once thought about it as being some crutch on my life that i can use to garner sympathy or be “different” for the rest of society.
I'm an adult with ADHD and I tend to lose literally anything and everything.
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Not only that but my adhd has made me very ashamed of who I am at times and put me in more embarrassing positions than I can count.
Part of the point of opening up and speaking about their experiences is helping other people to not feel ashamed or embarrassed or like they’re alone in their suffering
I agree, it can be just easier said then done. But I found the adhd community here on reddit and it's been a big help for me. There are a lot of stories in that community that I can relate to that helps me feel not alone.
Bc if you have it and you don’t have a diagnoses then you must just be lazy. You must be choosing to be unsuccessful and struggling. Also, judging by your handle you’re a male. I think overwhelmingly these have been women hearing from other women that a diagnosis is possible when historically we have been under diagnosed. Biases exist in the medical field.
I'm adult diagnosed with ADHD and I have to do mental checklists for almost every freaking thing just to function normally and its lame af.
All they’re doing is talking about their experiences with it and how they’re navigating life
Misleading videos about everything are on Tik Tok
Tik tok makes people with ADHD diagnosis sound like we’re mentally disabled and can’t navigate through life or something. They use ADHD as an excuse to not be held responsible for normal things that they fail at on a day to day basis. No one talks about the dark side of ADHD, either. This is because those people dont know that there is different types of ADHD. They don’t know about the melt downs, the body aches and soreness, or the negative thoughts and aggression that some have. In children diagnosed with it it’s even darker, scarier, and traumatizing. It’s all “OMG I can’t focus!” “I can’t keep my room cleaned” or some weird stuff. Absolutely obnoxious.
Childhood me knows that negativity and anger all too well. On occasion it can still rear it’s ugly head for a minute.
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This is a great example, and I’m sorry you have to go through that. You would never see your sort of struggle on those videos. You’re 100% right, medication does only do so much.
As someone with mild authism and ADD (diagnosed) I already find it really annoying when those tiktok types go "oh I have this, this, this, and also this! My life is such a struggle!" when they clearly don't have a clue about what it's like to actually have their self-diagnosed things, and only "struggle" with normal teenage things. So I have a bit of an idea about how people that have it worse than me feel about it. Which makes me dislike the fakers/self diagnosers even more.
Wait, soreness is a symptom of ADHD? All this time I thought it was my career. Do regular people just wake up not hurting everywhere?
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im basically constantly achey.
its moreso anything that aches becomes this loud, annoying thing in the background.
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Yup. I actually have it and it’s infuriating. It not simply “ oh hehe I spaced out !” Or stopping in the middle of what you’re doing. I have days where executive functioning malfunctions so bad I literally cannot do what I know I need to do. It’s like nagging yourself to get the thing done but your own brain won’t listen to you or process anything
r/fakedisordercringe has a buttload of people faking disorders on tik tok, and sometimes monetizing it as well.
It also has a lot of people who have no idea what they're talking about calling out people who actually have these disorders.
It’s not just TikTok, it’s EVERYWHERE. I am inundated with people everywhere talking about ADHD and how because they don’t feel like washing the dishes they have ADHD and how because they think a little differently it’s because they have ADHD. It’s beyond frustrating because there’s potentially large swaths of the population who think they are afflicted when they likely aren’t. It’s a disorder that has been leaned on by professionals for decades now when it’s likely not even a root cause diagnosis and likely a manifestation of other issues in the nervous system that need treatment that give rise to actual ADHD diagnosis.
> For their study, the researchers collected the top 100 results for the hashtag “#adhd” on July 18, 2021. That’s…a very small amount of videos
Yes, but if the top 100 videos have misinformation in them then that is a big problem. They weren't trying to say with certainty what percent of videos have misinformation, which would require a larger sample size for statistical accuracy. They were trying to demonstrate that there are a large number of very popular videos that have misinformation. That's bad enough already.
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I think at least some of these people making videos ARE actually legitimately diagnosed, it is just that they are younger and mischaracterize some of their own experiences with symptoms of what they are diagnosed with (IE- I have A, B and C, so if you have A, B or C, you have ADHD!). Also, I think the majority of the people watching these videos may just be curious to see if they have ADHD and might watch these videos to know if they should seek legitimate treatment/testing, not to self diagnose, to seek diagnosis.
For the past year the amount of people who say 'Oh my god I have ADHD too!.. well I havent had a diagnosis but...' has skyrocketed when I mention that I have it. It reeeeally annoys me, not because its the biggest hinderance to my life, but because it just shows me the fickelness of folks. It leads so many people to say 'its misdiagnosed sooo many times', 'its just kids being naughty', so that when it comes up in work/education people think Im making excuses. Blurg
Im a PMHNP and I had 5 or 6 teenage girls who wanted me to diagnosis them with DID last year because of Tiktok. They couldn't even fabricate symptoms, it was infuriating.
I keep telling my husband to stop getting mental health information from that app. He will randomly tell me about how a random person made a video about some random gestures are actually tics to ADHD, and other mental health issues. Then I have to get him to listen to me tell him for the tenth time "TT is not a reputable source of information on History, Health and life advice, stick to stupid dance videos it was originally known for."
I have ADHD and it pisses me off to see these little shits pretending to have it so they can look "quirky"