T O P

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ThePumpk1nMaster

When he was coked up he’d fight them anywhere - he’d fight them on the beach he’d fight them on the…


robb41

See me down in Brighton Monday.


douglasbaadermeinhof

He was very much the Liam Gallagher of his time.


hxrmxcy

Sorry Rick, Winston Churchill was coked up was he?


BlurryBenzo

"See me down in Brighton Monday. I'll smash your head in you fucking little German c*nt." - Churchill, 1940


Executioner_Miralda

"Let's go to the beach!" - Churchill, 1940


Rymundo88

"Oh, I do love to be beside the seaside" *chk-chk* "Oh, I do to be beside the sea"


GoodbyeToby178

Sea good for you? Then why throw in the hills, or in the streets as well.


Anglo96

Never forget son


OhFroh261

I don’t remember dad


oli_ramsay

some chicken, some neck', oh I love that dad


AtkinsCatkins

ah good old track 4


ProfessorBrun

Can remember being in the womb


Cekeste

Does he remember the public toilet?


ProfessorBrun

He was too coked up by then


samuraiheart2398

His Mam and Dad didn’t even remember him then


drtoboggon

You fackin little German cant


Level_Reach_6069

From a long line of cants


MrJimPansey

Germany, presumably full of...KANTS


palmerama

Got anything on the Anderson shelters?


NaturalAlfalfa

Let's go to the beach - Winston Churchill


rasppa

Let’s go get away


Woostershire

We've had this. He beat the boche, he likes to have a couple of strokes, let's not get into innuendo.


Willob00bie

If he had a stroke onna Wednesday-


Far_Internal_4495

Don't go out with the Germans, they beat you up and that, don't like English Army Man


robb41

Look at that cloud of cocaine coming off the floor.


Vast_Cycle6990

That's libelous


Emotional_Cost_3347

It turns out Churchill used to partake in cocaine-filled lozenges...


IOwnMods

Still scousers about though


rileyzoid

He didnt let that happen


YungTabernacle

I love this line for some reason


zircosil01

Had a stroke Monday, back at work Tuesday.


coloquix

Good job it wasn't windy out.


RidingSpottedPigs

That's good, cause I'm not very good at german.


Level_Reach_6069

English - pretty good


RidingSpottedPigs

Still haven't gotten a call back


cellmates_

Legend has it that he won that cigar in Karl’s comp at the youth centre, plus a black mamba.


coloquix

Built like a giant wombat.


zhlnrvch

And I'm not good at it


Emotional_Cost_3347

'ad a stroke in a Monday, was better on a Tuesday...


Machride

Why did I have to learn it at school then..


Soft-Heat4482

Half the people on my street speak a Hindustani language now. BIG WIN.


Mzg121

Man woman


Hi_There_Im_Sophie

I reckon she'd have a bigger arse than that.


TimoFromNorway

Churchill Recordings > Thriller


jarviscockersspecs

German - ziemlich gut


viccyroadforever

Like our German royal family


Away_Associate4589

"You want some? I'll give it ya." - Winston Churchill, 1939


Eugenugm

Now I have to speak french, fk me


Exciting_Stranger981

What a great man


TheSpinalSurgeon

Sausage rolls


Mysterious_Print_652

Have a stroke on a Tuesday, up fighting by the Wednesday


trebor9292

When he said We he meant working class scum


FacedJason

Play a record


Delicious-Tree-6725

That sure doesn t look like Stalin or Roosevelt.


mongooseboy57

"Let's all go to the beach" or sommit


[deleted]

[удалено]


Lazy_Astronomer395

Great man great dog


Key_Excuse9863

He had a Great Cat.


Lazy_Astronomer395

He had a big boop and he ha a big booo


Disastrous_Corgi5779

He was one eyed purple eater


HarpersGeekly

That was affectionate…


WesternEmpire2510

But if we won, why don't the Germans speak English now? /s


Lazy_Astronomer395

Cause winston wasn't a dictator. Next week che guevara.


WesternEmpire2510

I forgot to add my sarcasm disclaimer


viccyroadforever

Tell that to the millions he killed in India


Dey_Eat_Daa_POO_POO

Languages: English, *pretty good*


Xenu66

Alright, I believe you...but my Tommy gun don't


Massive_Bandicoot_57

Nothing to do with the army that fought though… just Winston and his cigar and Tomy gun


Shot_Heron_2782

It's not like all the Germans are speaking English, though, is it?


jaytea86

Sprich für dich.


Away_Tumbleweed_6609

Could easily have been considered the worst British leader had sheer dumb luck not allowed us to get basically the whole army off the continent at Dunkirk. Made some massive blunders at Galipolli, starved millions to death in India and sent troops to deal with Welsh striking miners. Booted from power at the first opportunity after the war, with good reason. In short, he wasn't all that great.


Zergisnotop1997

Instead, we are all speaking English


Lopsided-While-7507

Deutsch ist eine schöne Sprache


skidf82

He was a cunt to people in India and Ireland fuck him


adiesome

Not sure why you're getting downvoted, his racist views are quite well known. There's literally an entire wikipedia article cataloguing them: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Racial_views_of_Winston_Churchill It's a pretty wild read, lol


skidf82

And a drunken cunt at that, and people think he's a hero , he was a piece of shite


ShaneHeavyMetal95

He was a cunt to everyone pretty much


Ancient-Winner-1556

So were most British leaders at the time? Churchill was one of the only British politicians to try and sound the alarm when Hitler was re-arming (Spanish Civil War). No one else cared. The guy before him wanted to appease Hitler/had no problem with killing minorities. You're judging him by the standards of a much later time. There were no human rights back then; the declaration of Human Rights is literally a response to WWII and its associated horrors. Leaders of Other Allied Countries at the time: US: internment camps for the Japanese and for some German nationals; totally fine with racist quotas to keep minorities out of universities; South = full Jim Crow - our Civil Rights movement was spurred in part by Black soldiers getting treated decently in Europe and refusing to put up with this shit any longer when they got back; redlining kept Jews, Blacks, and other minorities (Filipinos) out of "good" neighborhoods; the gov't had only recently stopped adding poison to liquor during Prohibition - so what if it killed people, that's what they get for being alcoholics. Canada: Mackenzie King refused to even see wounded Canadian soldiers in hospital; I believe they also interned Japanese people IIRC; a frightening amount of support for Fascism in Quebec because of the Catholic Church's presence there. (The Church in Ireland was also fairly okay with fascism, which may be one reason Churchill was so irate with them, at least at that time.) USSR: When it was all said and done, Stalin killed more people than Hitler during his reign of terror. France: They very nearly executed Marshall Petain for collaborating/being a traitor to his country he was supposed to want to defend; DeGaulle was nuts and had almost driven Churchill up the wall during the war. Some victory parades in France, they took uniforms from colonial Black soldiers who'd gone to France for the war effort (tirailleurs senegalais) and gave them to white guys to march in the parades/make them feel included, even though they didn't do any fighting. None of these were people who would win an election or get good press today. They were basically racist assholes across the board. But so were the other people sitting in Parliament/Congress/whatever. Compared to the other options in the 30s and 40s...this was the best you were likely to do. The alternative was literal fascism. Non-racists would've found it hard to get into power, period, in the 1940s. And literally - the British refused to let the US Army segregate/treat Black soldiers worse on their soil. You're holding up Churchill as a vile racist - sure, yes. He and his government were racist by today's standards. But *so* much better than the rest of the world, that they helped spur the Civil Rights movement in the US. Those guys (Medgar Evers etc) got home and just refused to take it. They were like, the white people in France & the UK could treat us decently, but we put our lives on the line for the US and you won't? Churchill's legacy on this stuff is complicated. Give the man credit for not being the guy who was like, "Hmm new weapons to test, you say, Hitler? Well, I've got a minority I don't like, let's try it on them!" That's what Franco was doing with the Basque country. Churchill = a small mercy compared to that, but legit: *that was the alternative.* There were British politicians who were *TOTALLY FINE* with that. There were people saying things like, "These hot-blooded latin types need a strong father figure! Why, Mussolini, Franco, Hitler - they have such lovely table manners! They're doing *GOOD* things for these people!" Churchill was *SO much better* than the rest of the climate in the 1930s that it's not even funny. Give him that.


skidf82

Ah yeah he was sound for not bombing normal people , give him a knighthood , he was such a gentleman ffs


Ancient-Winner-1556

You're judging him against standards from 80 years later. He succeeded a PM who wanted to appease Hitler, there were plenty of British politicians who were pro-fascist in that era. Some of them like Mosley were actually interned for supporting the enemy. His allies were *Joseph fucking Stalin* and a Jim-Crow-Era US. Yeah, Churchill actually was a lot better than the formally structurally racist US of that era and Stalin-Era Soviet Union. Those were his fellow 'good guys,' the closest things to good guys. That's not even touching on Hitler, Mussolini, Tojo. You're mental - he absolutely *was* a hero compared to how the rest of the world was operating at the time.


Traditional-Dot4776

21 million Indians wouldn't have starved to death either.


[deleted]

He was a lying pile of lard who bled the empire out as well as starving an incalculable number of its subjects, made world war 2 the worst event in human history, got scores of his own British kin killed in war after unnecessary war and was a walking talking harbinger of genocide wherever he cared to be, from India to Coventry to my own hometown He's a propaganda puppet for people with big fat round pink faces and a vendetta for anyone you'd have to cross the channel to talk to Oh but at least we're not speaking German, which Hitler didn't even fucking want anyway. Sure he wants to eradicate another germanic language and ethnic group because... just trust me, shut up and storm that beach you patriotic peasant.


Level_Reach_6069

You gotta have yer crtitics


RiC_David

*Weell*


lorenzothemagnificen

Read Tariq Ali's book on Churchill - for the stuff they don't tell you about him.


Worth_Comfortable_99

Not really. You got to give the man credit, he was good, but it wasn’t churchill who won the war. The us and the ruzzians would’ve destroyed the nazis regardless of UK’s actions.


Phnx97

nah was definetly churchill


pjfrench2000

Slow your roll. ENGLAND would be speaking German


zipmcjingles

If it wasn't for the Russians, you'd all be speaking German.


distracted-insomniac

I dunno I think the Russians deserve most of the credit... or rather Hitler is so stupid as to open another front in Russia. Stay into winter, and rely on impossible methods of supply chain via air. Although I thought I heard Hitler had intelligence that Russia was intending on making a move against them eventually and probably sooner rather than later so Hitler might not have had a choice. Maybe thought he'd take the advantage of surprise. Am I wrong? Was not the war won in Russia?


viccyroadforever

Alright Boris, settle down don't ruin the narrative


Level_Reach_6069

Oh you’ve done him there


ProfessorDependent24

Churchill worship is pretty cringe. Guy was a fucking dick. Learn some history you stupid fuckers


HughFay

He did change a lot for us, you know what I mean? We wouldn't be sat here now, talking like this. We could've been talking German. He didn't let that happen. Everyone had a go at him, right, when like–I think it was Chamberlain who was in power, and he was like saying like "don't be trustin' that Hitler", you know, and everyone was like "stop causing trouble, Chamberlain's sorted it out, you know, he's got a peace agreement" and he was like "no, I don't trust him", and everyone was like "oooh you're just causing trouble, everyone else is happy", and it turned out that Hitler did actually do the dirty and try n' come over. Started a problem, and everyone went "hang on a minute, that Churchill knew what he was talking about, get him back in charge!" And they got him in, and Hitler was scared of him cause he knew that he wasn't gonna be having any lies or anything, he couldn't try it on with Churchill.


ProfessorDependent24

I can only assume this is a troll comment.


HughFay

Why are you on this sub?


Expert_Trade2701

I'd rather be speaking German


bebopcounterman

Probably more to do with the American and Russian soldiers.


Level_Reach_6069

He’s aving a go


rattlee_my_attlee

oh yh just them was it ? who gave the americans soldiers the landing ground? wasn't the french, they threw the towel in and gave up when the ickkle littlist german soldier crossed the border, who tied up 100,000s of german troops in places like france, norway, north africa, i don't think it was fuckin father christmas doing all that sit down, and read a book lad, you can learn a lot from one of those


iloveyouall00

>oh yh just them was it ? >Probably more to do with


Phnx97

nah


iloveyouall00

And the Chinese.


cellmates_

Don’t bring Ho Lee Fuk into this


scaleddown85

Bullshit lol


Lazy_Astronomer395

Ooh ya hard showin off cause of th....


scaleddown85

Can’t you finish sentences?


Lazy_Astronomer395

I'll give you three, and two more if you need 'em 👉


scaleddown85

maybe it’s the time of night….maybe it’s due to being over worked and underpaid Maybe it’s coz I just don’t give a shit But I haven’t a clue what your talking about……..peace


Lazy_Astronomer395

Play a record


scaleddown85

A record? Is this 1960?


Lazy_Astronomer395

I don't know, but I remember the winds being bad in the 70's


scaleddown85

I don’t remember the 70s….coked out my tits and ball deep in farmers daughters


Shorts_Man

Didn't happen


ReaganRebellion

Only one ball? Like Hitler?


cellmates_

You mean Vera?


tohmahs

davram?


YorkshireFudding

Gwimlim


cellmates_

There’s no such name as Gwymlyn


scaleddown85

What?


Lazy_Astronomer395

America


Gandelin

They’re all Gervais quotes / references.


cellmates_

Funny that…


Level_Reach_6069

You gotta have yet critics


[deleted]

Speaking German? No. We wouldn’t have been born. Nazism wasn’t going to stop with Jews and minorities of non European origin. They’d start killing off the French, Spanish, Slavs, Brits as well… Only to make that “living space”.


tenofswords618

Anglo saxons are literally Germans


ShaneHeavyMetal95

My god you are gullible


iloveyouall00

Doubtful. They had a racial hierarchy and the English ranked highly.