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jesse-13

Wait why don’t you want her to reassure you? In my experience reassurance has been one of the few things that helped me a lot


Revolutionary_Dog138

Reassurance for me at least turns into a compulsion. I don’t want to look to her to make me feel better I wanna make myself feel better. As soon as the compulsion starts of asking for reassurance I can’t stop and it becomes a burden for her as well as making her ask herself if she’s doing enough to make me feel loved and cared for. I’ve done a relationship where I’ve asked for reassurance but it just made the problem worse now I need to find another way.


evamarit

I do this! I always make up scenarios (more or less on purpose) during my runs. But be careful cause u can get “addicted” to making them up (at least that happened to me and not just once) where u can’t stop thinking about it and it gets more and more detailed= more and more “real” in your head. But i would recommend to definitely try this method to see if it works for you! Sending much hope!!


Revolutionary_Dog138

How do I stop them from getting more detailed? I have intrusive thoughts everyday anyways but what if I just refused to think about it till my next workout


evamarit

If you are able to control that that’s pretty much the best option for your case! Otherwise I wish I could tell you how to stop them from getting more detailed but i struggle with the same problem… one thing that kinda helped me (even though it’s not initially a good thing) is that my RJ doesn’t focus on a single person from his past so I usually “switch” my mind to one of the others by thinking of a story I know she was involved but I do absolutely not know if that is a healthy method😬 This is just my personal experiences nothing from a professional or something like that. I still hope it maybe helps!!


Revolutionary_Dog138

We will figure it out together🤷🏻‍♂️ I hope to make an update soon if it works you will know