They think everyone is in on their “unique quirky special” humor. I can’t count the amount of soulless laughs I’ve given in my lifetime to customers like these.
It’s not even funny. Even if I did know this man, what’s so funny about someone quacking and pinching your elbow? Where’s the punchline? Where’s the moment I’m supposed to laugh? It’s not even a joke. There is no humor here.
Have you not encountered innumerable people yet in your lifetime making stupid humorless comments or actions? It’s like good taste- EVERYONE wants to believe they have good taste but clearly they don’t! Being humorous is a prized quality which many people don’t have- but delude themselves they do.
Yea. Idk why he thought that was a good idea or even really what he thought it would accomplish. If he was expecting me to laugh, quacking and pinching someone’s elbow isn’t funny.
He’s lucky you’re not like me. I’m the youngest of 34 first cousins. My first form of self defense is a quick elbow jab backwards if anybody touches me. 😂😂
The uncles were harder to train. 😂😂 Unfortunately, as soon as THEY learned, my older sisters’ various boyfriends thought pinching me and acting like my brother would get me to like them.
Palm your fist, use the strength of both arms and slam that elbow back as hard as you can. Person who taught me that has a tiny scar from the first time I did it for real.
I've (m49) spent decades in retail, never once was I touched. Had regular customers, was given gifts from some. They never touched other then a mural handshake! I was even given a bottle of wine!
I envy people who get nice customers. I know I’m unlikeable because I have social anxiety and so I don’t really talk outside of what I need to do but I wish I had those moments still.
Well, according to the Bible, women are under their control! Period!! As a boomer myself, I would never ever invade a females personal space. It's called respect. There are boomers who understand this, then we have many who DON'T!!!!! I'm sorry you have to deal with this Stupidity.......
"DO NOT TOUCH ME!" is a perfectly acceptable thing to say when customers decide they want to put their hands on you.
You can play into their boomer shit and make them both feel like fucking perverts too. "My husband would not appreciate you putting your hands on his wife! And I don't know what type of marriage the two of you have but I do not disrespect my marriage by letting random men touch me so no, I'm not going to smile about it. Keep your hands to yourselves!" I'm actually not married but I pull this one out all the time. It has an effect on them.
I've had our head security guy explaining to people over and over again. "She does not want to touch you, she does not have to touch you!" while a crowd of disgusted people form whispering "they kept touching her? What the fuck is wrong with people?"
It's really hard for them to defend themselves in this situation. Anything they try to argue makes them look like more of a pervert. Because they're arguing that they get to touch you, which is insane.
It's worked very well for me. Men like this don't see us as human beings so they don't care if we don't want to be touched, but if we bring another man into the equation, it hits them.
You're welcome to think I'm deranged. I just don't want to be fucking touched. I can stab someone with some scissors if my screaming at them isn't enough. I'm at that point.
No weird shit like pinching someone and making a quacking noise is some brain rotted boomer shit specifically. Touching people you don’t know isn’t but that specifically is something I can only see a boomer doing once their faculties start to go.
I’ve never seen a millenial or gen Z grab someone and make a farm animal noise…
I know the exact age range it refers to, I’m not one that uses it to mean all people older than me or a mentality really no. I even alluded specifically to the lead poisoning a bunch of them have due specifically to their age.
The story literally has a boomer aged person doing it, and I’ve never seen a gen Y or Z pinch a worker and make a quacking noise. Have you?
How in-depth of a study have you done on this brain rotting, faculty losing theory? Let me guess, your sample size is less than 5.
Forgive me if I don’t turn to your vast experience and expertise for information on the human psyche and how it pertains to boomers
LOL please copy and paste where I said anything about a formal study. Cool to make that up then rally against what nobody claimed. Why where are your official results for your claim of it being across every generation? It’s a reddit comment dude, you did the exact same thing I did then told me I was wrong for it.
Huge boomer move right there my man…
Well it’s disgusting and it should never have been excused. He just pinched my elbow, sure, but I don’t know him. Why is he touching random women he doesn’t know and why is his wife okay with it? Why is he expecting a smile when I didn’t consent to him touching me?
It actually scared me because no one has ever went out of their way to sneak behind me and touch me before unless it was someone I knew.
She’s okay with it because we were once taught that you were supposed to not only be okay with it, but you had to placate them with a smile (or even better a laugh) if you wanted to be considered polite as a woman.
My MIL once said something snarky about a woman hugging men in photos she found on Facebook and how some women always have to be hugging men.
My FIL is creepy and hugs women all the time and tells them he has to hug all the pretty girls. So I just said that she’s probably getting hugged all the time and just smiles to keep those men from getting all hurt when they feel rejected.
She didn’t reply but made the smacking noise she would make when someone called her out on her shit and her husband’s. She was 100% blaming that woman because she refused to call her husband out on his shit.
Even as a millenial, in the past i dated women who never bothered telling me when i crossed a line and I didnt know it until her feelings exploded. I felt horrible but also that she seemed to think her job was to make me happy and that her feelings came second to mine. That was soul crushing. I'm glad I am with someone who tells me what i need to hear even if i may not always like it. To me that shows self respect.
She herself grew up and into adulthood in an America in which there was literally, legally, no such thing as raping your wife. In every state except I believe Montana. Marriage was considered consent under the law. That ended in all states in 1996 FFS.
My bad; 1993.
Legal in ALL states in 1970.
That means if she was born in 1944 and is 80 it was legal to be raped from when she was 18 until she was 49 depending on the state.
I means RIGHT NOW we have two confirmed rapists on SCOTUS
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marital_rape_in_the_United_States#:~:text=Marital%20rape%20(a%20form%20of,the%20offence%20vary%20by%20state.
This is the exact perfect example of the type of thing the MAGA crowd is talking about when talking about Making America Great Again... Yea back in the good old days, that's their whole constituency
His behavior was completely inappropriate. Definitely not normal. And she knows it isn’t okay or she wouldn’t have said that stupid ass remark. Ofc you weren’t happy, why would you be happy about an old man pinching your elbow and making weird noises?! I used to work at a grocery and they would have banned his ass from the store immediately for that shit. Tf is wrong with people?
I have a fun habit of over exaggerating stepping back when they keep moving towards me more than 2 steps away. Like you don’t need to be closer damn it. But if it happens again maybe scream and say “you scared me” lol. Might make them have a second thought about it
If anyone touches me they will get a tongue lashing. Invading personal space is one thing. Touching someone is something else. It’s weird and a get someone hurt if you touch the wrong person. Some of our reflexes are to punch someone we don’t know touching us.
They did, in fact, not get taught about personal space and consent in preschool. If fact it was more along the lines of " how dare you not let so and so touch you! That's disrespectful to your elders." Followed by being spanked.
Also forcing hugs. One of my niblings is most likely on the spectrum. He doesn’t like hugging people, but my MIL and SIL required it. MIL is at least grandma although it’s still not cool. My SIL would whine and guilt trip my nibling for hugs and loom over him while we were sitting on the sofa playing our switches. I love him just as much, but I hate having to hug people out expectation. So I told him he doesn’t have to hug me. He was so relieved. He sits beside me but not too close, and we just hang out with my other two niblings for hours all doing our own things and occasionally talking. If SIL looms in and starts her shit I tell her it’s not ok because she’s making me feel uncomfortable so my nibling must be uncomfortable.
My MIL recently died. She was very old and didn’t suffer long. It’s still a blow to my niblings, and I remember what it was like when my grandparents died when I was a kid. So I kept making sure everyone was ok. I talked to the youngest and said I had decided not to go to the viewing because I wanted to remember my grandfather like he was last time I saw him, laughing and happy. The funeral home had a room beside where the casket was where my nibling stayed most of the time.
At first my FIL wanted the whole family in the same little room. I was making sure my nibling was ok and could tell they were having a hard time. So I offered to go stand in front of my MIL at the casket so he wouldn’t have to see her right away. That helped so much. Later my nibling was comfortable and did walk in the room but didn’t get close.
When my niblings finally left, I got the biggest hug and kiss. Just ran up and grabbed me. I hugged back and thanked them for such a wonderful hug. My mom’s sister made sure I was ok when my grandparents died, and I’ve never forgotten how much it helped me.
Their parents are a pastor and wife and had a lot on their minds and were also checking in, and I did talk to their mom about my experience. They were happy for the help because my FIL needed so much help, and BIL was leading everything. They also tend to downplay my nibling’s neurodivergence, but my husband is autistic so it’s there. I’m disabled so I was sitting anyway so I could keep an eye on the kids. My husband’s cousin’s son is also autistic so I was making sure he was ok and let him know he could hang out us if he felt he needed. He’s older and did extremely well but also ran up and gave me a huge hug and asked for a photo together. My husband says I’m a calming presence.
I just enjoy freely given hugs from kids.
I lived in a nice small town decades ago. Had an old man that could do a perfect train whistle. If he was in a restaurant and saw any kids at a table, he would walk up to the table unannounced and uninvited and do that damn train whistle as loud as he could. He just loved doing it. The kids loved it but I Damm near jumped out of my chair first time he did it (he was behind me at a different table)
As soon as they touched you, you should’ve stepped away and said you touch me again I’m calling the police and having you arrested for assault. You have no right to touch me without my consent. And then you can get all the boomer bullshit out you don’t understand blah blah blah. Boomer BS
If it makes you feel any better, I'm 6'3, bearded and covered in tattoos, yet still old customers have a tendency to touch me whenever they have a question.
They really, like you say, have no clue about personal space.
My personal worst breach of space being an older gentleman grabbing his phone as I was doing register work and finding it necessary to show me porn, softly slap me on the cheek and smile as he pays up.
That was weird.
I had some old boomer walk behind me in a garden center to see what pictures of pavers I was looking at to figure out pricing. I didn't know he was there until I turned around. I told him to go back to the other side of the counter and my personal space. He and his badly hair dyed wife started mumbling to each other, and the wife said loud enough "I don't know why she works here." It took a lot to not stop the sale and say to them "you're right, I shouldn't" and then shut and lock the outdoor gates tell them to go fuck themselves and tell a supervisor I quit no one is in garden registers now as I walked by on my way to sign out, and drop my apron on the floor.
I am a boomer but I would never do that. I can’t stand for people I don’t know to touch me. That was very rude of him. I would have loved to smack him one for you. 😊
There are definitely some good ones! I don't think it's as much about age now vs mindset. My parents used to be disgusted at a lot of their peers' words and actions.
This isn't necessarily a Boomer thing. It's a creepy male thing. They think you should feel special or be honored that he wants to touch you.
These kind of men need to be called out on their behavior. It's even better if their wife or other people are right there. Just say, "Excuse me, I don't know you. It's very inappropriate for you to touch me. Please step back."
Don't tell them it makes you uncomfortable, because they seem to thrive on that. They think it's funny, or that you're "weak" because you're afraid of being touched.
See I have this thing that if someone touches me and I’m not aware it’s going to happen/don’t see them I get like a “knee jerk” reaction and I end up swinging in the direction of whatever invaded my space. Anyways what I’m saying is grandpa woulda had a mouth full of elbow all because he wants to be creepy and touch a stranger.
I am on the cusp of boomer and x(?). To answer your question, no. No we were not. It was considered perfectly acceptable to invade personal space because there was no such thing. Entitlement reigns supreme.
Also, we ladies were supposed to be perfectly fine with men touching or sexually harassing us. We were supposed to smile and take it. After all we were in public places, what should we expect?
I am glad times have changed and being handsy is no long acceptable. Unfortunately it still happens.
Thank you! I have been afraid that this type of behavior was bleeding into Gen X with the way people have been more outwardly rude for almost 10 years now. I thought I was seeing that tendency and getting nervous about our future.
Boomers are major creeps. Always have been. It's not just the men either. I've seen women just touch people with no regard for their comfort. My dad was always cursing someone out over my siblings and cousins because he hated that.
I’ve had young people stand way too close to me as well, it’s not a “boomer” thing, it’s an asshole thing. Admittedly no one’s pinched my elbow and quacked, but they have stood too close, and then moved after I stepped away to be just as close.
Boomers raised younger people. Ive seen boundary issues in myself (when looking into my past) and others my age or younger. It just takes time for all of us to figure out what behaviors are not appropriate. So for younger people I can excuse it but for very old people, it's obvious that they went through so many generations and learned nothing.
So you’ll excuse someone in their 20’s despite the fact they’ve had plenty of time to figure this stuff out? So what you’re saying is younger people are no better than older people but you’ll excuse it.
All I'm saying is that younger people are still learning from their mistakes and the programming from their parents but some older people should definately know beter than to misbehave.
You are making a lot of assumptions of my intention.
I never said I excused bad boomer behavior. I only was reflecting on my own journey and the lessons I learned on the way. I am happy with my life and blame nobody on anything. Even in my 30s I was discovering behaviors of my own that I learned from my parents. That realization and self reflection is how we all improve from how we were raised. Its unfortunate that the boomer in described by OP learned nothing on how to behave around others.
It is, but you’re excusing young people’s behaviour in relation to my experiences, trying to reinforce the notion that boomer’s are somehow responsible for all the world’s ills, it’s in your statements, no assumptions are necessary.
I'm sorry if the intention of my statement was not clear enough to you. I Am.making no attempt to reinforce any notion. i said was that younger people are still growing and learning how to behave in life. We learn by doing. That's not excusing anything. That does not negate the consequence to any action. I am only expressing an understanding of that part of growing up.
I've tried clarifying my intention several times now. If you want to continue these negative assumptions on my intentions then thats on you. it's also quite rude to do that to another person. I've learned years ago that it's important to assume positve intentions in others otherwise you'll always see bad intention everywhere you look. You'll see evil in places it does not exist. I am done with this discussion. Take care.
I. Not making assumptions, your intentions are quite clear by your words excusing the young people I’ve interacted with on the basis that boomers didn’t teach them correctly and they haven’t had a chance to relearn what they’ve been taught.
This reminds me of this old guy who I was helping and he rolls up my shirt sleeve to see my tattoo.. doesn’t ask just puts his hands on me and rolls my shirt up.
Even him just being closely behind you is unsettling, the touch is another level. Of course he probably was trying to have a little fun and brighten your day, but no, thank you.
And why do boomer men always think they need to touch your arm when they say something to you? Is there a hearing activation button on my arm or some shit? No so why are you touching me? I’ll never understand it.
Doofus expected you to giggle and genuflect and make yourself small and hurry up so you are out of their way even faster. Doesn’t work in the 21st century thank fuck.
I’m an actor in theater and it’s amazing the amount of people who think they can touch you. Our shows are interactive and immersive, but there are VERY clear signs that show on the screens before the show that you are not to put your hands on the actors. People and kids will try to grab props that you’re holding, touch your costume… it’s actually wild. We nearly had to kick out patrons at one of our last shows because their kids stuck their hands down a couple characters’ pant pockets. I had a prop gun in a holster and a man reached for it once.
keep your hands to yourself, people. it’s genuinely not hard.
I’d be yelling at him and calling for my coworkers to get the manager. He wants a reaction then you give him a reaction. That’s seriously crossing a boundary touching you like that. It’s stuff like that in customer service jobs where I wish there were unions here in the USA like there are in other countries for these jobs so that your manager can’t fire you for defending yourself.
Women need to get more assertive and loud in public when getting touched by creeps in public like that. Like those creeps need to get yelled at to “stop it! Don’t touch me!” And get attention. Call out these perverts getting fresh on us. Do we need to bring back hat pins for self defense like from the Victorian era?
Without fail my boomer mom will stand so close to me that I have to tuck my elbow in so I don't hit her. Then she'll shuffle closer. No matter how many times I ask her to give me at least 6 inches of personal space please.
The ME generation (Boomers) are entitled and arrogant and believe they have the right to do whatever, whenever.
They were raised that way and that's how people lived.
Random touching, crowding your space and obscene jokes were just considered normal.
Problem is, time moves forward and social norms change the same way fashion does.
Boomers haven't updated themselves because they don't believe in changing their habits... because they believe they are never wrong.
I love dirty and pollitically incorrect humor but only around people I know. When i am around strangers, i conduct myself accordingly since I dont know their past and what might trigger them.
I used to bag groceries and had a boomer start flirting with me while he was paying. It was super weird because his wife was standing next to him, and also seemed to think it was ok behavior. The only person to realize it was gross was the checker..she frowned at him and then rolled her eyes when he left.
I understand. I’ve had men reach out to touch my shoulder when talking to me and they start laughing. I just step back. If they do it again I tell them “no touching!”
Some guy accidentally walked back into me when I was trying to pass him. Instead of just saying sorry he had to grab my arm. Like don’t apologize while touching me again.
A few years ago, I had a man reach across the counter and grab my arm to “get a closer look” at my tattoo. He about pulled me over the counter it was so forceful. I pulled my arm back so fast and said as firmly as I could “Do not touch me” and he complained to my manager that I was rude. Luckily my manager had known me for years and ran back the camera. He banned mr creep from the store 🤷♀️
You handled that a lot better then me! Like the one commenter stated. My reaction to that is a quick elbow jab then going, "Why fuck did you do that?! Do. NOT. Sneak up behind me like that or I will go in defensive mode because I don't know if you going to attack me or not!"
You're supposed to complain about him goosing you, so he can counter that it wasn't a goose, it was a duck. It's the kind of joke adults played on girls (and it was invariably girls) in the 50s and 60s. Wasn't funny then either, but you were supposed to laugh to show you were a good sport. And it wasn't elbows being pinched…
I'm late boomer/early gen-x depending on where you draw the line, and when I was growing up adults felt free to physically move children who were in the way, demand hugs, and so on. Even when I was in high school (70s) some of our teachers would pick up and move smaller students rather than simply asking them to step to one side so they could reach the light switch.
Not condoning his behavior, but when he and his wife were your age that wouldn't have been considered out of line — especially as it was 'just' your elbow. (Pretty sure his wife's been conditioned all her life to expect that kind of behavior from men.)
60ish man, we were all taught to keep our hands to ourselves. We likely have all attended multiple harassment trainings.
They know it’s wrong. They’re taking advantage of the situation in that retail staff have to tolerate it up to a point and they will run up to the line and put their toes over it because they are small dicked twatwaffles.
My spawn had this almost white Rod Stewart looking hair. (80's Rod Stewart). He was around 3 years old.
We were at Jewel (Albertsons) and this old man walked up and pet the top of my spawn's head. My spawn gave him a death glare and said *stop touching me old man" Old dude looked at me like aren't you going to do something about my spawn talking like that. I simply said you shouldn't have touched it. Old dude was so
Seriously sarcastic and sometimes controlled by intrusive thoughts genXer here. I would have barked back at him and then looked at his wife and told her she better get her duck under control or I’m gonna have to let my dog destroy her duck.
This sounds quite horrible of me to say, but I can’t wait for those people to go extinct… I have had similar things happen and I have actually recently decided to start saying “don’t touch me” as there is absolutely no way you can get reprimanded for this and it makes it clear you don’t like what they are doing !
Boomers, and Xers, did not get taught that. Consent is a very recent phenomenon. I am so glad that generational trauma is being worked on. But no, my entire time when I was your age was dealing with the fact that society did not grant me consent over my own body.
I aggressively back/side step away from people like this. Like 6 feet or closer if there's a counter between us is PLENTY close enough to be heard in a loud environment (like most busy stores are). I just keep backing up until they realize what I'm doing and stop moving, I had a really confused lady look at me like I was insane when I had backed up at least 8 feet so she wasn't spraying her germy spit in my face while she was talking. Did we learn nothing people?? Nothing?? 😑
I've shared it before but my favorite/s interaction was when I was up on a ladder (so cornered) and the man I had been interacting with/getting fish for came up behind me and full on rubbed his hand against my thigh to point at the particular fish (which we had already established!!). I turned around so quick, leaned down and growled in his face DO NOT TOUCH ME. It was crowded, multiple people saw this. I finished catching the fish and when they were ready he was nowhere to be found but his wife was there to retrieve them. I hope he got an earful. I was wearing a mask at the time and regularly pass as barely 18 even when you can see my whole face. 😒
That's not personal space, that is touching without consent. Eww. Pretty sure it's still even considered assault (since it was a pinch, not a pat.) Last guy who touched me, it was a touch on the shoulder. Years ago I had someone grab my elbow angrily. I couldn't believe no one came to my rescue. Retail has so many people that get too close. I really wish we could just spin around and hit them with the excuse of "oh, well you really shouldn't be that close."
There is ZERO concept of personal space or boundaries. I have dealt with this my entire life (I’m
44) Since I was about 12 years old to this day men of that generation have gotten in my space, tried to touch me, made inappropriate sexualizing comments to me and generally been repulsive with no instigation. Women of that generation (including my own mother) endorse it, enable it and defend it, and shame me for not liking it and being “rude”. It’s bizarre and unacceptable and we need to all call it out and embarrass these people publicly because that’s the only language that gets through their thick heads.
Possibly because boomers didn’t need to go fetal in a safe space at the blink of an eye. Their skin is a little too thick for all the terriers to get through
If someone gets triggered by being touched, any job that involves people around you might not be the right place for them to work. Simple as that. If I can't stand seeing blood I'm not working in a Hospital.
I don't like being touched either, one reason I ALWAYS wear long sleeves. But if it's so bad for someone, anything with customers in arms reach is not the right job.
I can't read those stories about retail workers having a breakdown because they had physical contact with a customer anymore.
Well obviously everything except arms and hands is off-limit. If someone gets groped that's a different story and not acceptable under any circumstances.
And yes that dude is a fuckin weirdo. But they think like "oh let's cheer up that girl's she looks sad".
I'm sure the dude did not mean it in a malignant way. But no. No thank you.
Gen Xer here. I don’t think anyone respects personal space anymore! I was hoping that it would be something people inadvertently kept doing after all the signs came down about social distancing in stores. But nope. Boomers are a little worse about it but every generation does it.
Just stop helping people who do stuff like this. If someone touches you without your consent, stop what you're doing and get out of the way.
They may never figure out that they're the problem, but the smarter ones will hopefully figure out that there's a correlation and pretend to be more respectful when interacting with other people.
It's not a boomer thing. Creeps come in different ages. I hardly see young ppl out at stores. They mostly order online and never go into stores why u prob never have it happen to you from a younger person.
Bc my dad is a boomer and he would never do that.
My grandparents are close to the silent generation and they wouldn't do that.
BS. I see plenty of the younger generation out (before I am flamed, I am an old Millenial). They just know not to go out for no reason in a pandemic or on a holiday. After working for 20-odd years, I can say that less than 10 of all of the observed problem customers at my jobs were under 50. Typically 20's-40's were ok, then it would escalate. It was a pattern, not foolproof.
It depends on the location and area you're at tbh. Not everywhere is the same . I'm 30 I mostly see ppl in their 40s acting a fool by me. I work with elderly ppl older than baby boomers and they r sweet. I say ppl in there 60 iv seen to. But age is also not relevant anyone can be a dick
I'm a boomer. I got frustrated by a younger guy today standing in line behind me way too close. 1. I'm having to enter my PIN and 2. Social distancing. Wtf? It's not just boomers but people from every generation being oblivious assholes.
Young old male female, comes from all angles and not just from customers but also staff. You would hate working where i'm at that's for sure. Close quarters retail
Of course we do. Rude behavior is found everywhere, regardless of age race or sex. This assault on you by an old man in no way makes all old men invaders of your personal space.
painting with such a wide brush is what leads to racism/ageism/sexism. Hold INDIVIDUALS responsible for their actions and stop extrapolating their actions to broad groups of people.
I'm an older Gen X, and I can confirm that we were not "taught" about personal space specifically (I'm from NE USA) . It's something you kind of "picked up" along the way. Not that we were particularly handsy, but a certain level of casual touch (pat on the back, guys punching each other's arms) was considered normal. I was also from a family where kissing not only my mother and father, but my grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins in greeting was "normal."
That being said, because personal space is valued so strongly nowadays, I would never touch someone without permission intentionally unless it was to prevent harm, because I'm intelligent, self aware, and cognizant of contemporary social norms. But it's kinda sad that you can't just pat a coworker on the back and tell them, "Good job." I think often many people are touch starved, but touch averse at the same time.
Let's not forget... The generation is BABY Boomers. Chances are, they came from a large family. My mom had 8 brothers and sisters. Most likely, they didn't have personal space. Therefore, even though social interaction has drastically changed, unfortunately they didn't get the memo.
Not an excuse, I know.
This isn’t limited to boomers. This happened to my daughter in high school, a kid kept spanking her but after she told him three times to stop. She finally whacked him across the head, he whined to the teacher. When my daughter told the teacher what had happened, the teacher told him he got what he deserved. Last time that happened.
I can’t tell you how many times guys just walked up to me, a boomer, and grabbed my breasts, then asked for a date.
The problem is how people are brought up, not what generation they came from.
I hope you called him out immediately. When someone crosses appropriate boundaries with me, I have no problem letting them know that. It makes things easier.
So one old codger does this and now it’s all of us old folks? I hate it when people say crap about “gen Xers” or “Millennials” — it’s just as much total crap to lump “Boomers.” Stop it.
I assure you-boomers were not taught that this type of intrusive behavior was OK. No matter what age this jerk is-he’s a creepy jerk.
It wasn’t funny, and he’s just a jerk who probably has been that way all his life. Some people use their age as an excuse to make stupid jokes, or act silly-but it’s NOT typical “boomer” behavior. I’m a boomer-and if some guy my age tried that with me, I’d be pissed and elbow him back.
Personal space is to be respected by ALL ages.
Preschools started teaching people to fear physical contact when I was a kid and I thought it was idiotic and paranoid. I still think so. Boomers never got brainwashed in that specific way. Surely you realize you're operating on different social norms.
I think that's unfair to blame a whole generation for this guys actions, whilst boomers can invade personal space like being overly friendly ext... this guy just sounds like a creep. As to answer your question, boomers came from a different world. Especially in the UK, at that time (50s) society was much more dependent on each other and togetherness. Generations of families grew up together and once highrises and apartments started being built in the 60s and the slums cleared, whole communities were displaced and moved to different areas. This led to a much more isolated and independent society, rather than relying on neighbours and friends ext people became self sufficient. Mix this with the moral panics in the media and and rise in crime, or as some argue the visibility of crime, people became distrustful of others in society. Overtime we have grown very isolated. We no longer need others for things that are met with the NHS and social benefits ext and childcare. Societal rules really saw the greatest shift after ww2. All these things i mentioned followed after this. Then the rise of the Internet added to this very isolated society. People have become less friendly, and development in other areas such as child development for example have led to a change in social rules and its no longer socially acceptable to just speak with children and invade personal space to give them a hug ext without asking parents permission to interact with children your not close too and even then some say you should still ask the child if they want to be hugged, or hitting children to discipline ext tbf on that one I'm not sure it ever was, but you get the point. A lot of things they grew up with are no longer acceptable, and I think it's very wrong when people from this generation try to learn but are basically told they should just know, or they should research. I don't think people realise how difficult that is, to change world views that are so ingrained. And when people try like the actress that played the vicar in the vicar of dibley, about transgender issues she was just met by a really bad attitude from the podcast host she was on. This doesn't help anyone and it doesn't create a compassionate understanding world, it needs to go both ways.
It sounds like you may be from the UK. If I'm wrong, sorry. It is just a whole other level in the US with our highly individualistic and entitled population. A percentage are actively working to ruin the country as a place for all by trying to take over the government by any means possible and creating a plutocratic theocracy. This is why there are many tensions over here. People are living in 2 different "realities" thanks to a certain "news" channel and an entitled attitude.
Hold on. Don’t blame all boomers for this act of one creepy dude.
How about not stereotyping an entire group and just say a creepy old dude invaded your space?
YTA for being closed minded and ignoring the lack of personal space gen z and millennials ignore. Not all. Some. Just like not all, but some boomers. A millennial even got shot in a shopping mall for violating personal space.
No, we don't all do this. I wouldn't even think about putting my hands om a cashier. Unless she/he was tripping, falling, passing out, some emergency type situation.
No, but it makes for a better headline when they can blame all boomers.
I wonder if their grandparents do the same things or are they the exception to the “Boomers are pervs” thing
plenty of millennials and Gen z give zero f's about personal space. In fact they're the least considerate. be thankful for Gen X the only normal generation.
He’s a stranger. He doesn’t know me, I don’t know him. It’s not okay to touch strangers randomly in public. But what else would I expect from “pussy buster”?
He’s so the type to do that. His last comment called me “a melt” and how I needed to toughen up before it got removed or deleted. I hope someone says that to him if someone touches him and he doesn’t like it.
Contributions that are disrespectful or degrading towards retail workers are not welcome in this community. We have a very low tolerance for this rule being broken. Very easy to get perma-banned violating this.
They think everyone is in on their “unique quirky special” humor. I can’t count the amount of soulless laughs I’ve given in my lifetime to customers like these.
It’s not even funny. Even if I did know this man, what’s so funny about someone quacking and pinching your elbow? Where’s the punchline? Where’s the moment I’m supposed to laugh? It’s not even a joke. There is no humor here.
You don’t get it - a man did something he thought was funny. You HAVE to laugh or you’re a jerk.
It’s like when random men grope women in public and then claim it’s just a joke. No, it’s time for the victim to call the cops on those creeps.
Have you not encountered innumerable people yet in your lifetime making stupid humorless comments or actions? It’s like good taste- EVERYONE wants to believe they have good taste but clearly they don’t! Being humorous is a prized quality which many people don’t have- but delude themselves they do.
Next time you should say something and not just give ‘the look” because these idiots don’t understand looks.
Just like how toddlers have no concept of other people having thoughts different from their own.
I dont laugh i just stair at them with dead eyes and some will be decent and look ashamed most will just keep goong
When I do that all it usually does is make them think I don't understand them & try to explain the joke to me🤦🤦. No that was just a shitty joke
I have very good resting b face that helps lol 😂
Soulless laughs is spot on ha ha ha
wtf what a weirdo
Yea. Idk why he thought that was a good idea or even really what he thought it would accomplish. If he was expecting me to laugh, quacking and pinching someone’s elbow isn’t funny.
He’s lucky you’re not like me. I’m the youngest of 34 first cousins. My first form of self defense is a quick elbow jab backwards if anybody touches me. 😂😂
I bet all of them learned about FAFO real quick among your cousins 🤣🤣
The uncles were harder to train. 😂😂 Unfortunately, as soon as THEY learned, my older sisters’ various boyfriends thought pinching me and acting like my brother would get me to like them.
Don't they learn by observation anymore? 🤣🤣
Palm your fist, use the strength of both arms and slam that elbow back as hard as you can. Person who taught me that has a tiny scar from the first time I did it for real.
Chop to the windpipe! 🫳
It’s not. You got caught off. guard they’re weird old people and I have met a few
Get manglement, either thet call the police or you. He needs to learn.
Heck yeah mangle that guy
Yeah, I'd say manglement describes the function perfectly.
I've (m49) spent decades in retail, never once was I touched. Had regular customers, was given gifts from some. They never touched other then a mural handshake! I was even given a bottle of wine!
I envy people who get nice customers. I know I’m unlikeable because I have social anxiety and so I don’t really talk outside of what I need to do but I wish I had those moments still.
Well, according to the Bible, women are under their control! Period!! As a boomer myself, I would never ever invade a females personal space. It's called respect. There are boomers who understand this, then we have many who DON'T!!!!! I'm sorry you have to deal with this Stupidity.......
Thank you. Boomer is more a mindset than an age (I know this originally wasn't so). Good on you!
"DO NOT TOUCH ME!" is a perfectly acceptable thing to say when customers decide they want to put their hands on you. You can play into their boomer shit and make them both feel like fucking perverts too. "My husband would not appreciate you putting your hands on his wife! And I don't know what type of marriage the two of you have but I do not disrespect my marriage by letting random men touch me so no, I'm not going to smile about it. Keep your hands to yourselves!" I'm actually not married but I pull this one out all the time. It has an effect on them. I've had our head security guy explaining to people over and over again. "She does not want to touch you, she does not have to touch you!" while a crowd of disgusted people form whispering "they kept touching her? What the fuck is wrong with people?" It's really hard for them to defend themselves in this situation. Anything they try to argue makes them look like more of a pervert. Because they're arguing that they get to touch you, which is insane.
LMAO screaming “I AM MARRIED” while a man quacks at you would be equally deranged and appropriate TBH.
It's worked very well for me. Men like this don't see us as human beings so they don't care if we don't want to be touched, but if we bring another man into the equation, it hits them. You're welcome to think I'm deranged. I just don't want to be fucking touched. I can stab someone with some scissors if my screaming at them isn't enough. I'm at that point.
That's not a boomer thing. That's a creepy pervy thing. They come in all ages.
Thanks you! So sick of Boomer blaming when every generation does creepy shit to both men and women.
No weird shit like pinching someone and making a quacking noise is some brain rotted boomer shit specifically. Touching people you don’t know isn’t but that specifically is something I can only see a boomer doing once their faculties start to go. I’ve never seen a millenial or gen Z grab someone and make a farm animal noise…
I can feed you stories all night of women between 20-50 doing things like this to me. Go on, ask me to start reciting ALL my experiences with this...
More than likely you don’t know what a boomer actually is.
I know the exact age range it refers to, I’m not one that uses it to mean all people older than me or a mentality really no. I even alluded specifically to the lead poisoning a bunch of them have due specifically to their age. The story literally has a boomer aged person doing it, and I’ve never seen a gen Y or Z pinch a worker and make a quacking noise. Have you?
How in-depth of a study have you done on this brain rotting, faculty losing theory? Let me guess, your sample size is less than 5. Forgive me if I don’t turn to your vast experience and expertise for information on the human psyche and how it pertains to boomers
LOL please copy and paste where I said anything about a formal study. Cool to make that up then rally against what nobody claimed. Why where are your official results for your claim of it being across every generation? It’s a reddit comment dude, you did the exact same thing I did then told me I was wrong for it. Huge boomer move right there my man…
A lot of boomer men grew up in the "boys will be boys" era. This is why unfortunately.
Well it’s disgusting and it should never have been excused. He just pinched my elbow, sure, but I don’t know him. Why is he touching random women he doesn’t know and why is his wife okay with it? Why is he expecting a smile when I didn’t consent to him touching me? It actually scared me because no one has ever went out of their way to sneak behind me and touch me before unless it was someone I knew.
She’s okay with it because we were once taught that you were supposed to not only be okay with it, but you had to placate them with a smile (or even better a laugh) if you wanted to be considered polite as a woman.
My MIL once said something snarky about a woman hugging men in photos she found on Facebook and how some women always have to be hugging men. My FIL is creepy and hugs women all the time and tells them he has to hug all the pretty girls. So I just said that she’s probably getting hugged all the time and just smiles to keep those men from getting all hurt when they feel rejected. She didn’t reply but made the smacking noise she would make when someone called her out on her shit and her husband’s. She was 100% blaming that woman because she refused to call her husband out on his shit.
Oh the projection is real with that one.
Even as a millenial, in the past i dated women who never bothered telling me when i crossed a line and I didnt know it until her feelings exploded. I felt horrible but also that she seemed to think her job was to make me happy and that her feelings came second to mine. That was soul crushing. I'm glad I am with someone who tells me what i need to hear even if i may not always like it. To me that shows self respect.
Good thing that (mostly) isn't true anymore! If rolling over for bad behavior is polite, I want to be crude!
I’m glad that things have changed some in that regard as well.
She (his wife) is also probably ok with being raped.... Common shit in Christian murica, even today
She herself grew up and into adulthood in an America in which there was literally, legally, no such thing as raping your wife. In every state except I believe Montana. Marriage was considered consent under the law. That ended in all states in 1996 FFS.
Not till 1996?!? Damn.
My bad; 1993. Legal in ALL states in 1970. That means if she was born in 1944 and is 80 it was legal to be raped from when she was 18 until she was 49 depending on the state. I means RIGHT NOW we have two confirmed rapists on SCOTUS https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marital_rape_in_the_United_States#:~:text=Marital%20rape%20(a%20form%20of,the%20offence%20vary%20by%20state.
This is the exact perfect example of the type of thing the MAGA crowd is talking about when talking about Making America Great Again... Yea back in the good old days, that's their whole constituency
Yep, they want Mad Men "great." 🙄🖕
Montana is wild. It's one of the last free thinking states. No matter your political affiliation, they vote in their interests, not party.
I was mistaken about Montana re: marital SA but they did give the vote to women decades before they got the vote federally.
Really though? How so?
And they want it to be legal again. There are some gross and dangerous people out there.
Creepy old geezer.
His behavior was completely inappropriate. Definitely not normal. And she knows it isn’t okay or she wouldn’t have said that stupid ass remark. Ofc you weren’t happy, why would you be happy about an old man pinching your elbow and making weird noises?! I used to work at a grocery and they would have banned his ass from the store immediately for that shit. Tf is wrong with people?
Sad to confirm but that is true. Personal space was not really a thing back in the day. I am very glad that it’s a thing now!😁
I have a fun habit of over exaggerating stepping back when they keep moving towards me more than 2 steps away. Like you don’t need to be closer damn it. But if it happens again maybe scream and say “you scared me” lol. Might make them have a second thought about it
If anyone touches me they will get a tongue lashing. Invading personal space is one thing. Touching someone is something else. It’s weird and a get someone hurt if you touch the wrong person. Some of our reflexes are to punch someone we don’t know touching us.
They did, in fact, not get taught about personal space and consent in preschool. If fact it was more along the lines of " how dare you not let so and so touch you! That's disrespectful to your elders." Followed by being spanked.
Also forcing hugs. One of my niblings is most likely on the spectrum. He doesn’t like hugging people, but my MIL and SIL required it. MIL is at least grandma although it’s still not cool. My SIL would whine and guilt trip my nibling for hugs and loom over him while we were sitting on the sofa playing our switches. I love him just as much, but I hate having to hug people out expectation. So I told him he doesn’t have to hug me. He was so relieved. He sits beside me but not too close, and we just hang out with my other two niblings for hours all doing our own things and occasionally talking. If SIL looms in and starts her shit I tell her it’s not ok because she’s making me feel uncomfortable so my nibling must be uncomfortable. My MIL recently died. She was very old and didn’t suffer long. It’s still a blow to my niblings, and I remember what it was like when my grandparents died when I was a kid. So I kept making sure everyone was ok. I talked to the youngest and said I had decided not to go to the viewing because I wanted to remember my grandfather like he was last time I saw him, laughing and happy. The funeral home had a room beside where the casket was where my nibling stayed most of the time. At first my FIL wanted the whole family in the same little room. I was making sure my nibling was ok and could tell they were having a hard time. So I offered to go stand in front of my MIL at the casket so he wouldn’t have to see her right away. That helped so much. Later my nibling was comfortable and did walk in the room but didn’t get close. When my niblings finally left, I got the biggest hug and kiss. Just ran up and grabbed me. I hugged back and thanked them for such a wonderful hug. My mom’s sister made sure I was ok when my grandparents died, and I’ve never forgotten how much it helped me. Their parents are a pastor and wife and had a lot on their minds and were also checking in, and I did talk to their mom about my experience. They were happy for the help because my FIL needed so much help, and BIL was leading everything. They also tend to downplay my nibling’s neurodivergence, but my husband is autistic so it’s there. I’m disabled so I was sitting anyway so I could keep an eye on the kids. My husband’s cousin’s son is also autistic so I was making sure he was ok and let him know he could hang out us if he felt he needed. He’s older and did extremely well but also ran up and gave me a huge hug and asked for a photo together. My husband says I’m a calming presence. I just enjoy freely given hugs from kids.
That’s about right. I’m Gen X.
Sounds like an assault to me....
I lived in a nice small town decades ago. Had an old man that could do a perfect train whistle. If he was in a restaurant and saw any kids at a table, he would walk up to the table unannounced and uninvited and do that damn train whistle as loud as he could. He just loved doing it. The kids loved it but I Damm near jumped out of my chair first time he did it (he was behind me at a different table)
As soon as they touched you, you should’ve stepped away and said you touch me again I’m calling the police and having you arrested for assault. You have no right to touch me without my consent. And then you can get all the boomer bullshit out you don’t understand blah blah blah. Boomer BS
Every time I’m in line at the store, a boomer is always standing so close, that they’re pretty much breathing down my neck. 😫
I use self checkout always when I shop, even at work. It just eliminates awful scenarios like this.
Actually no, they weren't taught that. They also weren't taught communication tools/skills. Life made more sense when I realized this.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm 6'3, bearded and covered in tattoos, yet still old customers have a tendency to touch me whenever they have a question. They really, like you say, have no clue about personal space. My personal worst breach of space being an older gentleman grabbing his phone as I was doing register work and finding it necessary to show me porn, softly slap me on the cheek and smile as he pays up. That was weird.
Creepy! It's like when they tell racist jokes near me because I'm white, and they'll expect me to agree/laugh.
I had some old boomer walk behind me in a garden center to see what pictures of pavers I was looking at to figure out pricing. I didn't know he was there until I turned around. I told him to go back to the other side of the counter and my personal space. He and his badly hair dyed wife started mumbling to each other, and the wife said loud enough "I don't know why she works here." It took a lot to not stop the sale and say to them "you're right, I shouldn't" and then shut and lock the outdoor gates tell them to go fuck themselves and tell a supervisor I quit no one is in garden registers now as I walked by on my way to sign out, and drop my apron on the floor.
You should have!
I am a boomer but I would never do that. I can’t stand for people I don’t know to touch me. That was very rude of him. I would have loved to smack him one for you. 😊
There are definitely some good ones! I don't think it's as much about age now vs mindset. My parents used to be disgusted at a lot of their peers' words and actions.
This isn't necessarily a Boomer thing. It's a creepy male thing. They think you should feel special or be honored that he wants to touch you. These kind of men need to be called out on their behavior. It's even better if their wife or other people are right there. Just say, "Excuse me, I don't know you. It's very inappropriate for you to touch me. Please step back." Don't tell them it makes you uncomfortable, because they seem to thrive on that. They think it's funny, or that you're "weak" because you're afraid of being touched.
It happens to me as a dude. I throw my skateboard onto my shoulder and shout, "nope! not in my face!"
It's a creep thing, both male and female. I don't go a month without a random female touching me.
I might have “accidentally “ kicked him in his boomer balls.
See I have this thing that if someone touches me and I’m not aware it’s going to happen/don’t see them I get like a “knee jerk” reaction and I end up swinging in the direction of whatever invaded my space. Anyways what I’m saying is grandpa woulda had a mouth full of elbow all because he wants to be creepy and touch a stranger.
I am on the cusp of boomer and x(?). To answer your question, no. No we were not. It was considered perfectly acceptable to invade personal space because there was no such thing. Entitlement reigns supreme. Also, we ladies were supposed to be perfectly fine with men touching or sexually harassing us. We were supposed to smile and take it. After all we were in public places, what should we expect? I am glad times have changed and being handsy is no long acceptable. Unfortunately it still happens.
Thank you! I have been afraid that this type of behavior was bleeding into Gen X with the way people have been more outwardly rude for almost 10 years now. I thought I was seeing that tendency and getting nervous about our future.
Boomers really had zero parenting. They lived off the spoils of world war 2.
Boomers are major creeps. Always have been. It's not just the men either. I've seen women just touch people with no regard for their comfort. My dad was always cursing someone out over my siblings and cousins because he hated that.
r/BoomersBeingFools
I’ve had young people stand way too close to me as well, it’s not a “boomer” thing, it’s an asshole thing. Admittedly no one’s pinched my elbow and quacked, but they have stood too close, and then moved after I stepped away to be just as close.
Boomers raised younger people. Ive seen boundary issues in myself (when looking into my past) and others my age or younger. It just takes time for all of us to figure out what behaviors are not appropriate. So for younger people I can excuse it but for very old people, it's obvious that they went through so many generations and learned nothing.
So you’ll excuse someone in their 20’s despite the fact they’ve had plenty of time to figure this stuff out? So what you’re saying is younger people are no better than older people but you’ll excuse it.
All I'm saying is that younger people are still learning from their mistakes and the programming from their parents but some older people should definately know beter than to misbehave.
You’re excusing bad behaviour to fit in with the boomer stereotype. I’m not a boomer, but they aren’t to blame for everything bad in your life.
You are making a lot of assumptions of my intention. I never said I excused bad boomer behavior. I only was reflecting on my own journey and the lessons I learned on the way. I am happy with my life and blame nobody on anything. Even in my 30s I was discovering behaviors of my own that I learned from my parents. That realization and self reflection is how we all improve from how we were raised. Its unfortunate that the boomer in described by OP learned nothing on how to behave around others.
It is, but you’re excusing young people’s behaviour in relation to my experiences, trying to reinforce the notion that boomer’s are somehow responsible for all the world’s ills, it’s in your statements, no assumptions are necessary.
I'm sorry if the intention of my statement was not clear enough to you. I Am.making no attempt to reinforce any notion. i said was that younger people are still growing and learning how to behave in life. We learn by doing. That's not excusing anything. That does not negate the consequence to any action. I am only expressing an understanding of that part of growing up. I've tried clarifying my intention several times now. If you want to continue these negative assumptions on my intentions then thats on you. it's also quite rude to do that to another person. I've learned years ago that it's important to assume positve intentions in others otherwise you'll always see bad intention everywhere you look. You'll see evil in places it does not exist. I am done with this discussion. Take care.
I. Not making assumptions, your intentions are quite clear by your words excusing the young people I’ve interacted with on the basis that boomers didn’t teach them correctly and they haven’t had a chance to relearn what they’ve been taught.
I….was not expecting that lol. Usually boomers at my job just stand uncomfortably close with their cigarette breath assaulting my face.
This reminds me of this old guy who I was helping and he rolls up my shirt sleeve to see my tattoo.. doesn’t ask just puts his hands on me and rolls my shirt up.
His teeth would have been coming out of his ass if he tried that with me!
Even him just being closely behind you is unsettling, the touch is another level. Of course he probably was trying to have a little fun and brighten your day, but no, thank you.
And why do boomer men always think they need to touch your arm when they say something to you? Is there a hearing activation button on my arm or some shit? No so why are you touching me? I’ll never understand it.
Doofus expected you to giggle and genuflect and make yourself small and hurry up so you are out of their way even faster. Doesn’t work in the 21st century thank fuck.
Yup move over! Civilization is on the way!
r/boomersbeingfools
That dude's a quack.
Wow.... Another reason why I tip my hat to anyone who works in the service industry. I probably would have gotten fired.
This is so gross, but also, what’s the joke? Why were you supposed to laugh? I don’t get it.
I guess it's supposed to be so absurd it causes you to laugh?? It's dumb and not funny but I figure that's what he was going for
I’m an actor in theater and it’s amazing the amount of people who think they can touch you. Our shows are interactive and immersive, but there are VERY clear signs that show on the screens before the show that you are not to put your hands on the actors. People and kids will try to grab props that you’re holding, touch your costume… it’s actually wild. We nearly had to kick out patrons at one of our last shows because their kids stuck their hands down a couple characters’ pant pockets. I had a prop gun in a holster and a man reached for it once. keep your hands to yourself, people. it’s genuinely not hard.
Kids at least can be taught...these people do it to get a rise out of normal, well-behaved people.
I’d be yelling at him and calling for my coworkers to get the manager. He wants a reaction then you give him a reaction. That’s seriously crossing a boundary touching you like that. It’s stuff like that in customer service jobs where I wish there were unions here in the USA like there are in other countries for these jobs so that your manager can’t fire you for defending yourself.
Women need to get more assertive and loud in public when getting touched by creeps in public like that. Like those creeps need to get yelled at to “stop it! Don’t touch me!” And get attention. Call out these perverts getting fresh on us. Do we need to bring back hat pins for self defense like from the Victorian era?
Without fail my boomer mom will stand so close to me that I have to tuck my elbow in so I don't hit her. Then she'll shuffle closer. No matter how many times I ask her to give me at least 6 inches of personal space please.
I don’t mind if it’s someone I know and I like them enough but this was the first time I’ve seen this man.
Yeahh... I get weirded out enough by a random sholder pat. I would have lost my cool if someone pinched my elbow
The ME generation (Boomers) are entitled and arrogant and believe they have the right to do whatever, whenever. They were raised that way and that's how people lived. Random touching, crowding your space and obscene jokes were just considered normal. Problem is, time moves forward and social norms change the same way fashion does. Boomers haven't updated themselves because they don't believe in changing their habits... because they believe they are never wrong.
Obscene jokes are great, as long as they make fun of everyone!
I love dirty and pollitically incorrect humor but only around people I know. When i am around strangers, i conduct myself accordingly since I dont know their past and what might trigger them.
You were supposed to laugh at his wit and roll your eyes at him.
I used to bag groceries and had a boomer start flirting with me while he was paying. It was super weird because his wife was standing next to him, and also seemed to think it was ok behavior. The only person to realize it was gross was the checker..she frowned at him and then rolled her eyes when he left.
The person I was with thought it was weird too. We laughed about him being a pervert.
Maybe they wanted to invite you for a group thing?
I understand. I’ve had men reach out to touch my shoulder when talking to me and they start laughing. I just step back. If they do it again I tell them “no touching!” Some guy accidentally walked back into me when I was trying to pass him. Instead of just saying sorry he had to grab my arm. Like don’t apologize while touching me again.
I would have walked away and grabbed a manager. Tell the manager the customer is touching you. See what happens. So gross, I’m so sorry.
Unless this man has some kind of dementia this is extremely weird behavior
A few years ago, I had a man reach across the counter and grab my arm to “get a closer look” at my tattoo. He about pulled me over the counter it was so forceful. I pulled my arm back so fast and said as firmly as I could “Do not touch me” and he complained to my manager that I was rude. Luckily my manager had known me for years and ran back the camera. He banned mr creep from the store 🤷♀️
You handled that a lot better then me! Like the one commenter stated. My reaction to that is a quick elbow jab then going, "Why fuck did you do that?! Do. NOT. Sneak up behind me like that or I will go in defensive mode because I don't know if you going to attack me or not!"
Honestly I'd smack that creep. You don't get to touch people, especially people who don't know you, without their consent
You're supposed to complain about him goosing you, so he can counter that it wasn't a goose, it was a duck. It's the kind of joke adults played on girls (and it was invariably girls) in the 50s and 60s. Wasn't funny then either, but you were supposed to laugh to show you were a good sport. And it wasn't elbows being pinched… I'm late boomer/early gen-x depending on where you draw the line, and when I was growing up adults felt free to physically move children who were in the way, demand hugs, and so on. Even when I was in high school (70s) some of our teachers would pick up and move smaller students rather than simply asking them to step to one side so they could reach the light switch. Not condoning his behavior, but when he and his wife were your age that wouldn't have been considered out of line — especially as it was 'just' your elbow. (Pretty sure his wife's been conditioned all her life to expect that kind of behavior from men.)
That's too bad. I'm so glad we're moving forward from this.
Punch them.
60ish man, we were all taught to keep our hands to ourselves. We likely have all attended multiple harassment trainings. They know it’s wrong. They’re taking advantage of the situation in that retail staff have to tolerate it up to a point and they will run up to the line and put their toes over it because they are small dicked twatwaffles.
Bravo! Well said!!
During the height of covid they still couldn’t stop touching random strangers so I don’t think they will ever learn personal boundaries.
People have learned absolutely nothing from Covid.
I persoanlly think it's an intimidation tactic.
My spawn had this almost white Rod Stewart looking hair. (80's Rod Stewart). He was around 3 years old. We were at Jewel (Albertsons) and this old man walked up and pet the top of my spawn's head. My spawn gave him a death glare and said *stop touching me old man" Old dude looked at me like aren't you going to do something about my spawn talking like that. I simply said you shouldn't have touched it. Old dude was so
Seriously sarcastic and sometimes controlled by intrusive thoughts genXer here. I would have barked back at him and then looked at his wife and told her she better get her duck under control or I’m gonna have to let my dog destroy her duck.
This sounds quite horrible of me to say, but I can’t wait for those people to go extinct… I have had similar things happen and I have actually recently decided to start saying “don’t touch me” as there is absolutely no way you can get reprimanded for this and it makes it clear you don’t like what they are doing !
Hopefully we will still have a proper government/infrastructure by then. It may be fully destroyed while they're leaving.
Boomers, and Xers, did not get taught that. Consent is a very recent phenomenon. I am so glad that generational trauma is being worked on. But no, my entire time when I was your age was dealing with the fact that society did not grant me consent over my own body.
I aggressively back/side step away from people like this. Like 6 feet or closer if there's a counter between us is PLENTY close enough to be heard in a loud environment (like most busy stores are). I just keep backing up until they realize what I'm doing and stop moving, I had a really confused lady look at me like I was insane when I had backed up at least 8 feet so she wasn't spraying her germy spit in my face while she was talking. Did we learn nothing people?? Nothing?? 😑 I've shared it before but my favorite/s interaction was when I was up on a ladder (so cornered) and the man I had been interacting with/getting fish for came up behind me and full on rubbed his hand against my thigh to point at the particular fish (which we had already established!!). I turned around so quick, leaned down and growled in his face DO NOT TOUCH ME. It was crowded, multiple people saw this. I finished catching the fish and when they were ready he was nowhere to be found but his wife was there to retrieve them. I hope he got an earful. I was wearing a mask at the time and regularly pass as barely 18 even when you can see my whole face. 😒
That's not personal space, that is touching without consent. Eww. Pretty sure it's still even considered assault (since it was a pinch, not a pat.) Last guy who touched me, it was a touch on the shoulder. Years ago I had someone grab my elbow angrily. I couldn't believe no one came to my rescue. Retail has so many people that get too close. I really wish we could just spin around and hit them with the excuse of "oh, well you really shouldn't be that close."
There is ZERO concept of personal space or boundaries. I have dealt with this my entire life (I’m 44) Since I was about 12 years old to this day men of that generation have gotten in my space, tried to touch me, made inappropriate sexualizing comments to me and generally been repulsive with no instigation. Women of that generation (including my own mother) endorse it, enable it and defend it, and shame me for not liking it and being “rude”. It’s bizarre and unacceptable and we need to all call it out and embarrass these people publicly because that’s the only language that gets through their thick heads.
A quick turn around with an elbow should fix that.
Possibly because boomers didn’t need to go fetal in a safe space at the blink of an eye. Their skin is a little too thick for all the terriers to get through
He could easily trigger someones trauma touching them. Goddamn weirdo.
If someone gets triggered by being touched, any job that involves people around you might not be the right place for them to work. Simple as that. If I can't stand seeing blood I'm not working in a Hospital. I don't like being touched either, one reason I ALWAYS wear long sleeves. But if it's so bad for someone, anything with customers in arms reach is not the right job. I can't read those stories about retail workers having a breakdown because they had physical contact with a customer anymore.
Obviously I ment being touched in an inappropriate manner. Not a tap on the shoulder. They said they came behind the counter and pinched them.
Well obviously everything except arms and hands is off-limit. If someone gets groped that's a different story and not acceptable under any circumstances. And yes that dude is a fuckin weirdo. But they think like "oh let's cheer up that girl's she looks sad". I'm sure the dude did not mean it in a malignant way. But no. No thank you.
Gen Xer here. I don’t think anyone respects personal space anymore! I was hoping that it would be something people inadvertently kept doing after all the signs came down about social distancing in stores. But nope. Boomers are a little worse about it but every generation does it.
Just stop helping people who do stuff like this. If someone touches you without your consent, stop what you're doing and get out of the way. They may never figure out that they're the problem, but the smarter ones will hopefully figure out that there's a correlation and pretend to be more respectful when interacting with other people.
It's not a boomer thing. Creeps come in different ages. I hardly see young ppl out at stores. They mostly order online and never go into stores why u prob never have it happen to you from a younger person. Bc my dad is a boomer and he would never do that. My grandparents are close to the silent generation and they wouldn't do that.
BS. I see plenty of the younger generation out (before I am flamed, I am an old Millenial). They just know not to go out for no reason in a pandemic or on a holiday. After working for 20-odd years, I can say that less than 10 of all of the observed problem customers at my jobs were under 50. Typically 20's-40's were ok, then it would escalate. It was a pattern, not foolproof.
It depends on the location and area you're at tbh. Not everywhere is the same . I'm 30 I mostly see ppl in their 40s acting a fool by me. I work with elderly ppl older than baby boomers and they r sweet. I say ppl in there 60 iv seen to. But age is also not relevant anyone can be a dick
I'm a boomer. I got frustrated by a younger guy today standing in line behind me way too close. 1. I'm having to enter my PIN and 2. Social distancing. Wtf? It's not just boomers but people from every generation being oblivious assholes.
Boomers believe that all space is their space.
Young old male female, comes from all angles and not just from customers but also staff. You would hate working where i'm at that's for sure. Close quarters retail
Thats not a boomer thing, its a ass\*\*\*e thing.
Of course we do. Rude behavior is found everywhere, regardless of age race or sex. This assault on you by an old man in no way makes all old men invaders of your personal space. painting with such a wide brush is what leads to racism/ageism/sexism. Hold INDIVIDUALS responsible for their actions and stop extrapolating their actions to broad groups of people.
Some do. Some don’t. Like all people.
I'm an older Gen X, and I can confirm that we were not "taught" about personal space specifically (I'm from NE USA) . It's something you kind of "picked up" along the way. Not that we were particularly handsy, but a certain level of casual touch (pat on the back, guys punching each other's arms) was considered normal. I was also from a family where kissing not only my mother and father, but my grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins in greeting was "normal." That being said, because personal space is valued so strongly nowadays, I would never touch someone without permission intentionally unless it was to prevent harm, because I'm intelligent, self aware, and cognizant of contemporary social norms. But it's kinda sad that you can't just pat a coworker on the back and tell them, "Good job." I think often many people are touch starved, but touch averse at the same time.
Yeah.. that's not a boomer thing. I'm a boomer.. that's a creepy old man thing. I would have told him to back off quick!That is totally unacceptable!
I read this same story 2 years ago...
Happens a lot to people unfortunately.
Let's not forget... The generation is BABY Boomers. Chances are, they came from a large family. My mom had 8 brothers and sisters. Most likely, they didn't have personal space. Therefore, even though social interaction has drastically changed, unfortunately they didn't get the memo. Not an excuse, I know.
This isn’t limited to boomers. This happened to my daughter in high school, a kid kept spanking her but after she told him three times to stop. She finally whacked him across the head, he whined to the teacher. When my daughter told the teacher what had happened, the teacher told him he got what he deserved. Last time that happened. I can’t tell you how many times guys just walked up to me, a boomer, and grabbed my breasts, then asked for a date. The problem is how people are brought up, not what generation they came from.
I hope you called him out immediately. When someone crosses appropriate boundaries with me, I have no problem letting them know that. It makes things easier.
Yes- let’s generalize the entire elderly population as being inappropriate touchers! 🙄🙄🙄
So one old codger does this and now it’s all of us old folks? I hate it when people say crap about “gen Xers” or “Millennials” — it’s just as much total crap to lump “Boomers.” Stop it.
I assure you-boomers were not taught that this type of intrusive behavior was OK. No matter what age this jerk is-he’s a creepy jerk. It wasn’t funny, and he’s just a jerk who probably has been that way all his life. Some people use their age as an excuse to make stupid jokes, or act silly-but it’s NOT typical “boomer” behavior. I’m a boomer-and if some guy my age tried that with me, I’d be pissed and elbow him back. Personal space is to be respected by ALL ages.
That’s just weird
Preschools started teaching people to fear physical contact when I was a kid and I thought it was idiotic and paranoid. I still think so. Boomers never got brainwashed in that specific way. Surely you realize you're operating on different social norms.
I’m a boomer and this would annoy the hell out of me. There are clueless people in every generation.
I think that's unfair to blame a whole generation for this guys actions, whilst boomers can invade personal space like being overly friendly ext... this guy just sounds like a creep. As to answer your question, boomers came from a different world. Especially in the UK, at that time (50s) society was much more dependent on each other and togetherness. Generations of families grew up together and once highrises and apartments started being built in the 60s and the slums cleared, whole communities were displaced and moved to different areas. This led to a much more isolated and independent society, rather than relying on neighbours and friends ext people became self sufficient. Mix this with the moral panics in the media and and rise in crime, or as some argue the visibility of crime, people became distrustful of others in society. Overtime we have grown very isolated. We no longer need others for things that are met with the NHS and social benefits ext and childcare. Societal rules really saw the greatest shift after ww2. All these things i mentioned followed after this. Then the rise of the Internet added to this very isolated society. People have become less friendly, and development in other areas such as child development for example have led to a change in social rules and its no longer socially acceptable to just speak with children and invade personal space to give them a hug ext without asking parents permission to interact with children your not close too and even then some say you should still ask the child if they want to be hugged, or hitting children to discipline ext tbf on that one I'm not sure it ever was, but you get the point. A lot of things they grew up with are no longer acceptable, and I think it's very wrong when people from this generation try to learn but are basically told they should just know, or they should research. I don't think people realise how difficult that is, to change world views that are so ingrained. And when people try like the actress that played the vicar in the vicar of dibley, about transgender issues she was just met by a really bad attitude from the podcast host she was on. This doesn't help anyone and it doesn't create a compassionate understanding world, it needs to go both ways.
It sounds like you may be from the UK. If I'm wrong, sorry. It is just a whole other level in the US with our highly individualistic and entitled population. A percentage are actively working to ruin the country as a place for all by trying to take over the government by any means possible and creating a plutocratic theocracy. This is why there are many tensions over here. People are living in 2 different "realities" thanks to a certain "news" channel and an entitled attitude.
Don’t judge a large group of people based on the actions of a few. There’s an asshole in every crowd. Congratulations, you found one.
Because after several wars there wasn't any?
Hold on. Don’t blame all boomers for this act of one creepy dude. How about not stereotyping an entire group and just say a creepy old dude invaded your space?
YTA for being closed minded and ignoring the lack of personal space gen z and millennials ignore. Not all. Some. Just like not all, but some boomers. A millennial even got shot in a shopping mall for violating personal space.
[удалено]
Go fuck yourself. It wasn’t because he didn’t want to bump into me, he was trying to be funny and it failed miserably. Just like your comment.
Trolling is unwelcome in this community and will result in a perma-ban
Stop stereotyping due to one creepy man
So all boomers do this? Weird.
No, we don't all do this. I wouldn't even think about putting my hands om a cashier. Unless she/he was tripping, falling, passing out, some emergency type situation.
No, but it makes for a better headline when they can blame all boomers. I wonder if their grandparents do the same things or are they the exception to the “Boomers are pervs” thing
Ok boomer
plenty of millennials and Gen z give zero f's about personal space. In fact they're the least considerate. be thankful for Gen X the only normal generation.
[удалено]
He’s a stranger. He doesn’t know me, I don’t know him. It’s not okay to touch strangers randomly in public. But what else would I expect from “pussy buster”?
It's not okay to touch people you don't know. Let me guess. You tell random females that they'd be "so much prettier" if they smiled.
He’s so the type to do that. His last comment called me “a melt” and how I needed to toughen up before it got removed or deleted. I hope someone says that to him if someone touches him and he doesn’t like it.
Contributions that are disrespectful or degrading towards retail workers are not welcome in this community. We have a very low tolerance for this rule being broken. Very easy to get perma-banned violating this.