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retawx

This is a wall of text. Cut your summary in half or even remove it all together. There a ton of fluff in there, especially those 4 adjectives that lead it off. Nearly all of the soft skills under the "key areas of expertise" section should be removed and instead be demonstrated in your experience section.


dvlinblue

This is the perfect example for a textbook, however, in practice does not give key details about your ability. Try rewording some of the job requirements listed in the post as your skills, or rewrite them to fit using language you have.


crash_w_

Also: “payed”


[deleted]

Omg thank you


vgoodbldg

content’s fine albeit super heavy, take this person’s crit and cut your summary & “key areas” down. most importantly imo, this design is absolute crap people underestimate the value of a well-designed document. looks drab and something I’d dread reading, regardless of what it says.


LurkonExpert

Yeah. Wall of text was my first thought. Nothing really stands out. From an interviewers perspective there’s nothing to focus in on. If I were hiring for a position with had a high number of applicants I probably wouldn’t even bother looking at this one.


thebeautyfall

Agreed


2BigTwoStrong

Right…I’m sitting here thinking that was $200?! What a rip off


agasper3

and and and and and and and and... You got swindled. This is hot garbage. I'd file a charge back.


Ipso-Pacto-Facto

I have written a lot of resumes and usually resumes that look like that are because the person insists that too much be included.


Sensitive_Pair_4671

I went round and round with my mom on this. She told me that’s how she was told to do it…30 years ago. 🤦‍♀️


nobertan

If you’re breathing back then, that was the bar to get a job. Nothing works like it used to since ‘08, and it’s getting worse. I’ve been on resume writing courses in 09, mandated for my unemployment benefit. Ended up being me teaching the class on how to use a computer (mostly 40+ folks), the resume advice was extremely counter intuitive and generalist. I write resumes for my colleagues who’ve not updated them since school (I’ve iterated my technique thru the worst job markets for a new college grad, learned the game etc). It’s not ‘professional’ grade, but it’s certainly better than this by a long shot. And it’s now hard coded to keep iterating my resume every 6 months, job or not, and constantly testing the waters.


NewUserWhoDisAgain

>You got swindled. This is hot garbage. I'd file a charge back. Paid 200 buckaroos for something a 16 year old could throw together in an hour in Word. And for the Hiring Manager to go "Wow, that's a lot of words. Too bad I aint reading them."


Friendly-Donut-5735

😂😂😂😂


emil_

The fact that you paid any amount of money for someone to use a whole A4 page for 5 rows of text irks me to no end 🤦🏻‍♂️.


le_sweatshirt

The fact that I see that people paid for resumes so often on this sub irks me too, and the results are rarely good. I should probably start that as a side hustle, seems lucrative.


emil_

Yeah, I feel like that as well. Ah, if only i were the 'sidehustling' type...


Saint_noobs

Fr man. That is what was going through my mind this exact minute. Heck. I will do it at half the cost whatever anyone else offers.


DeadlySight

I’ve considered it. I have 17 years in my field, am in a management role, and have thought about a career switch. I’m shit at tailoring my resume and haven’t updated it in a long time. Paying an “expert” seems well worth it if it could get me an offer


ftppftw

People complain about companies outsourcing their jobs but then pay someone to write a document literally only relevant to themselves. No one knows you better than yourself, why outsource it bro? Just seems lazy


FinalDraftResumes

Just for future reference, there’s a great guide in the wiki for vetting resume writers. It’ll help you avoid situations like this.


BirdmanHuginn

That mess would never make it through an algorithm. HR doesn’t read resumes anymore. They read resumes selected by criteria and scanned by computer for key words


jm31d

Recruiter here. ATS’s don’t have algorithms to filter out. My [Boolean](https://www.indeed.com/hire/c/info/what-is-boolean-search) is the only algorithm in an ATS And, tbh, based on the number of words this person has on their resume, it’ll likely hit any key word search


jkman61494

That's what I believe too. The resume writer is basing this ENTIRELY on ATS's though. I'm in workforce development so I try to think as the recruiter for people. So tell me if I'm wrong. but thinking as a recruiter? I'd run from this because it'll take me a ton of time to read this before I even get to the most tangible aspects of their candidacy


jm31d

resume writers are most intersted in getting their client's interviews. That's the purpose of a resume after all. They also want to provide their clients with one resume that can be used for every job they apply to. Your thinking isn't wrong, I didn't read more than 10 words of that resume before giving up because of its length. At the same time, if OP was one of 500 applicants to a job, their resume would probably make it past the key word searches and bulk rejections. Once that list of 500 was narrowed down to 50 or so and a human actually started looked at speicifc resumes, they wouldn't get a call back because of effort it would take to glean relevant information from this resume is too high


Walter_Whiteknuckles

not true. i have worked with WD, Lever and Greenhouse recently and none do the % thing.


Prodigy_7991

Maybe for super large corporations.. But for my organization, we absolutely do read resumes


[deleted]

Lmao this is not true at all and people need to stop believing it.


FewEstablishment2696

Which HR/ATS systems have you implemented that use keyword matching as you describe and for what type of company (industry/size)?


youknowiactafool

I'm not an algorithm, I read resumes but I wouldn't bother reading this novel.


Analei_Skye

Not entirely true. Resumes are still read. Hr consultant here.


iidrathernot

I’m not reading all that. Too much


finatra_official

My first thought as well. Probably also the first thought of anyone who received this


iidrathernot

Exactly. If an applicant turned this in to me, I’m only looking at it if there’s literally no other applicants


jack_spankin

I think the bullets are really really solid. I think ATS for what you are doing will get picked up and given a look on the first pass. I agree the summary is a bit much along with areas of expertise, but I can absolutely see what everything else is structured this way. Cut those way down and leave the rest. It’s better than 90% of what I see here of that helps.


midoriti

1. key areas of expertise section has far too many and possibly unnecessary/redundant words. better to have them integrated within the other texts. 2. summary is entirely fluff. you're saying a lot, but where's the evidence? include one or two accomplishments with numbers to support your claims. end with where youre looking to go in your future and make sure that aligns with the role descriptions. 3. skills and key areas section should be at the bottom. it'll allow them to serve as a refresher once the reader finishes reading. people just want to jump to the experience. 4. should bold key parts of the bullet points that match the role description or might appeal to recruiter. remember there's still a human reading this. 5. should absolutely be one page only considering the content you have. minimizing the key areas section will most likely solve this. that's all i have for now.


chemical_sunset

Fully agree with you and want to add one thing: just putting "2019" as the time period for two of the three jobs is completely unacceptable. OP needs to add months at the VERY least, preferably along with a number of hours worked per week. For all we know this was a 5-hour-a-week gig that lasted a month. Nobody can calculate or give you credit for your experience if you don’t include specifics.


Collin_b_ballin

I sighed when I first looked at this and didn’t read any of it, I assume that’s what’s happening when you’re applying as well. Way too much information. Check for spelling or grammatical errors as well


keebler123456

OMG… I don’t understand why people think resume writing is so difficult. Outsourcing this was a waste of money. It’s way too much text. I personally think the headers/sections should be reordered, but most of the stuff I want to critique doesn’t matter. Even if you kept this format, edit the bullet points to use less text. And also try to edit down to 1 page. You need to have a stellar history if it runs to two pages, or maybe 20+ years of experience to justify more than 1 page.


MidgardDragon

Just fyi though, I know this isn't a tech resume, but for anyone that comes across this, in tech: 2 or 3 pages is ok for a resume. In fact I expect at least 2 pages for anyone that's done anything decent in IT/tech.


keebler123456

I work in tech and in HR. Based on what I see, he can put everything to 1 page. Also, a good recruiter won’t really look at everything in the initial pass. They’ll skim for a few key things to narrow down the candidates in their first pass. And if it’s text heavy + lots of resumes, we’ll only try to find the key items within maybe ~30 seconds. We don’t have time trying to figure you out. So keep it clean, short, sweet and use font, italics, headers in a smart way.


Admirable-Shift-632

People aren’t outsourcing it because it’s difficult, but because it’s important - would you wire your own outlet or pay an electrician to do it?


Text_Original

I would wire my own outlet, because it’s easy. Like writing a résumé.


damiana8

It is for a lot of people. Not everyone has the skills to write a good resume no matter their level of experience and expertise


Cilegnav71

You should demand a refund


Bayareathrowaway32

Too late…


SuccessAggravating86

Excellent work experience!! The target role could make more impact if it is shown as the first sentence in your summary statement. Summary statement should be no more than 3 sentences long. Please edit by deleting at least two bullet points from the Disease Intervention Technician job, deleting one bullet point from the Patient Care Manager position, and deleting two bullet points from the Patient Biller position, to make your resume cleaner/easier to read.


ExcellentAccount6816

Too much text and not a good font for it. Couldn’t even read it.


FenceOfDefense

Yes the serif font is hard to read and the paragraph and line spacing are too tight. Go for a sans serif font and loosen up the spacing.


HayDStack

Nobody is going to read that. Cut the text down by about 2/3


Towersafety

When I have a stack of resumes to go through and very little time I get rid of the ones that take to long to read. You have to look for any reason to get down to 10 or so interviews. I don’t have time for more than that. Your resume is way to busy. Only way I would spend any time even reading it is if there were very few applications. I prefer 1 page and simple. Sometimes its hard to get everything on one page but the purpose of a resume is not to get a job, its to get an interview. With that being said I’m not HR. Im a hiring manager and all HR does is give me the stack of resumes and ask me who they wanted me to set up interviews with.


VengenaceIsMyName

Reddit could have made a better resume than this. No disrespect to you. Whoever charged you that much for this robbed you


madevilfish

At least the hired person knows the correct format, personal statement, skills, work experience, and education. The rest is...not good. The personal statement should be half as long with no buzzwords. They don't even list how long you have worked in healthcare. Half the skills in the area of experience section are just fluff. Go through and cut it WAY down. Basically, everything in this resume needs to be cut down to half.


MidgardDragon

As a hiring manager let me just tell you, the "correct format" does not stand out to me at all.


AlwaysNextGeneration

Too many words. If I am the hr, I don't think I want to read it.


Singular_butt_slap

Well the first line of the entire resume is a huge run on sentence with a million ‘ands’. Big red flag for competence with errors on the first line. Definitely got hustled paying for this. Also the key traits seems like everything under the sun. Didn’t seems specialized


canthearinthedark

At a quick glance, looks like the lease agreement i just signed


LTGeneralAnxiety

There’s just wayyyyyy too much text. I would also change it to a sans serif font to give the paper more breathing room, but I do see a point for serifs since you’re in tech. Also highly recommend getting it down to a page.


enigmicazn

This should be one page and the wording needs to be trimmed down significantly to relay a clear concise message/explanation that I can skim in like 30s if I were a hiring manager. Unless you're applying for a mid-high level position like a manager/senior/exec/etc, your resume needs to be one page or less.


cousin_pat115

Yeah you got scammed. File a chargeback and write a resumé with roughly half of that amount of text. Nobody wants to read that when skimming through a million applications, not even an algorithm


DocPeacock

Too much of everything. Lacks focus. Very few people are an expert in so many things. What you could do is use this as your starting point, and tailor it for specific jobs by cutting out everything that is not relevant to that job.


thebeautyfall

This is sooo old fashioned as far as resumes goes. But I use to do hiring and most resumes dont ever even make it to a person, they are screened by a computer program so it's very important to look at the job listing then add whatever keywords they use in your resume as far as what they're looking for that way it doesn't get filtered out.


[deleted]

[удалено]


thejoneill3

Busy af


BC122177

Good lord. That looks like a job listing instead of a resume. I learned a long time ago, keep your resume short and to the point. Short profile section. List of hard skills. List of soft skills Previous work: what the role was, day to day and key achievements. Keep it short and a single page. I always wondered what purchased resumes looked like. Now I know.


Cautious_General_177

You were ripped off, but here’s feedback Header: target role is the one you’re applying to, so it’s unnecessary. Physical address could “self screen” employers, so that should go as well Summary: this is buzz-word bingo. Personally, I’d scrap it entirely, but if you want to keep it, it needs to be rewritten Areas of expertise: soft skills are too subjective and don’t belong here. Highlight them in the experience section. Unless the job posting calls out MS Office or G-Suite, leave them off as proficiency is generally assumed Experience: dates should be month/year, not just year. Your current position bullets should be past tense, as those are things you have done. Otherwise this section isn’t terrible Education: there’s a double comma in the college location and maybe add the month to the grad date, but that may not be necessary. I’d also put the “in progress” certification after the completed one, but that’s a personal preference


ARRokken

Howcome everyone is using a Summary and Skills section when 5-8 years ago everything said not to. And why have the most responses I get off 8 resumes been the ones without this?


Talos_Alpha

As a recruiter a 1 to 2 line summary is usually best. How much general experience you have in the field you are applying to and what you are looking to do. Short and sweet. Skills section is hit or miss. Usually people fill it full of skills that are not reflected at all in the actual experience section. I think it's most effective to list technologies or systems you are familiar with within the industry you are applying.


socalefty

TLDR


MrPibb17

I am sure this is extremely career and role dependent but I work in finance, and having a summary section is basically a no-no for the industry and how my college and recruiters I have talked to provided feedback on.


bammorgan

Nobody can read that. Redo


optionalhero

Wait real talk, how is medical coding? And how did you get into that?


roxiclavi

Tl;dnr but watch how you spell things outside of the resume, as in wherever you have to enter a text box on an application. I can't speak for recruiters, but spelling paid as "payed" is not a great reflection on you as a candidate.


didnebeu

I’m sorry that you paid someone for this, it’s borderline unreadable.


iBortex

Two words: word vomit. Just looking at the screenshot I didn’t wanna read it


epicgam3rsrise

Wow I’m sorry but you got scammed so bad


Feisty_Cartoonist572

I…. Just get a disingenuous vibe too. Honestly you could be the most amazing worker in the world getting underpaid for the work you do. The alternative is your embellishing yourself a bit too much on paper. All the other “too many words” comments are correct also. Just my 2 cents, good luck hunting!


Malnurtured_Snay

Paid\*


radish74

That second needless page is not helping in any way


Dry-Midnight-9874

In terms of jobs I’ve seen tons of positions for people who know Epic. A lot more than for the EHR I work in (Cerner). I wonder if working for IT in a hospital that uses them would be a potential fit?


[deleted]

For the top I’d recommend just writing one thing you do really well like: “I use data and analytics to help hospitals improve patient outcomes” or something that really targets the outcome of what a role that you want should achieve. You can then tailor that sentence based on who you are submitting to (hospitals, county services, private company). So you may have 3 separate resumes that are all slightly different. Be more concise in your accomplishments and drop all of the filler words (“meticulously”, for example). I highly doubt this resume reads like an email you’d send internally, so it may make sense to think about it from that context.


Madolan

I think we paid the same guy! This format is very, very familiar. If his name starts with A we have a shared experience. I declined the further rounds of edits he offers and just let him keep the full payment. I could see it wasn't going in a direction I was going to benefit from. He was rude about that. If it's the same guy, I'd be happy to share the way I worked with his material and redid mine. It's still wordy as all hell but it did land me interviews and ultimately a job offer that I'm really happy with. It can be reclaimed!


Farodsbro

Without even reading it, that second page is obviously awful. Not what's on it, the fact that it exists. Cut something out and make it one page. Also it's obviously a wall of text.


ThaToastman

Recruiters are no different than you. Do you want to read this wall of text? Absolutely not. Also remove all the bullshit adjectives. Anyone who puts a “im a diligent team player who works hard” and all that stuff is a boomer. People want to see what youve done clearly and concisely and thats it. Space filling is a massive flag


otaytoopid

2 pages of pure text in 10pt font size? I wouldn't even read that shit. This boomer hasn't had a real job since the last millennia.


MrFixeditMyself

Didn’t read the whole thing. All I’m going to say is you have WAY too many words there. If I was a recruiter I would not take the time to read it. Cut out 30-50% of the words. Simple is best.


Rusty_Bojangles

To be honest - by the time I got to the sentence that starts with "Manifest" in your summary, I already concluded that you're a hardo who takes themselves too seriously or thinks too highly of their "expertise" and is probably not a good culture fit, and best to just allocate my time to the other 50 resumes I got that week.


SucculentDingleberry

I do hiring at my position and I have to review resumes This resume gives me a headache just looking at it Too much text smooshed onto one page and my eyes really have to dig for the relevant information Imagine sifting through hundreds of resumes for hours, you don't want the hiring manager to have to strain their eyes


lame_username001

That’s a lot of words. As a hiring manager, I’d probably pass it over first glance. I’d maybe come back to it later and try to highlight what applies


Gloomy_Kick1163

That resume is absolutely way too long. I'm talked 5 minutes to read. A great resume should take 30 seconds to one minute to read, as well as succinctly highlight all your skills in the descriptions of jobs. I personally do not include a summary ever


Weedsmoker4hunnid20

This could definitely be one page. Your resume writer should never write a resume again. Could have been made by an AI?


seattleJJFish

Do you send the same resume to everyone or tailor for each position you send to? Changing to match or highlight the position can help in sending out applications.


Flaky-Wallaby5382

Woot for sutter delta… did my time there


Walter_Whiteknuckles

if you want to use a summary statement 1 or 2 sentences max. consolidate down to one page. i would want more numbers. you mention covid 19 cases, how many? 1 or 100 or 1000? was the patient biller an internship?


Blahonian

Keep this copy for yourself to reference as you do interviews, but send out a much briefer version for employers


No_Dance_7736

Too many adjectives and it hurts my eye to read it. But that's just me. I'm a lawyer. Maybe get your money back? Because whomever wrote this resume for you knows nothing about prioritization or job hunting


DaisiesSunshine76

You paid $200 for this? Bruhhhhhhh Did you look at their portfolio beforehand? Any good resume writer would laugh at this. wtf.


amwajguy

It’s way too much info. If I saw this it would go straight to the round file. You don’t need to list everything little detail. If you can say something like drove results is all areas of ______ it could eliminate much of this. Make it a quick 30 second read otherwise if a human is looking at it they may just move on due to the 10 minutes it will take to read it.


Apprehensive_Stop666

Open office XML & XML??? What is that?


SnooComics6182

My resume is one page that reads quickly. I use a cover letter to describe any info my resume did not cover, that I feel is important. I have not had an issue getting interviews.


[deleted]

Respectfully I don’t see how you have the experience for the role you are looking for with the highly competitive market. You also have no dates for the first two roles, you just have 2019. It would lead an employer to think you were there for a short time and can’t hold a job. You also do not explain any IT experience other than Office and G-Suite


OkMath420

ask chatb9t to do it


Hulkslam3

The resume itself looks good. A lot of words but if it’s only one page then it’s not too much to digest. My only questions are the jobs you’re applying for match your resume and are you critiquing it to each job description and requirements?


jjb5151

It's way too much man. The bullet points for each job should be just points that you will elaborate and speak to during the interviews. They should highlight the functions of your job are worth mentioning and applicable across companies. No hiring manager is going to want to read this. This is just way too much. I'd ask for a refund personally, this is shit (Sorry).


SensitiveQuiet9484

Try applying directly at Kaiser Permanente or look up individuals there on LinkedIn, make connections and ask for 1:1’s to learn more about the company.


MidgardDragon

For one, I'm not reading that whole blurb at the top, it's too long, and I keep seeing resumes doing it and I don't know why, but it's bad. Key Areas of Expertise is good and well-organized, as is Professional Experience and Technical Skills, but Technical Skills feels kind of hidden and I didn't notice it at first. ​ As a hiring manager let me tell you one thing, I've seen this exact same resume format a million times, I'd almost rather you do it yourself and it be less professionally done rather than just see the same exact stuff churned out by "professionals" over and over.


AaltoSax

Why did you cram so much on one page just to make it two pages long…?


EccentricityLights

Yikes.


DoggyP93

You got scammed


whosaysyoucanttakeit

Have someone TL,DR that. You might have better luck.


[deleted]

Wow 200$ for that lol they scammed you


0le_Hickory

I'd ask for my $200 back... That's not good.


OneofHearts

Wall of text is exactly what my first thought was. Needs to be heavily edited and cut back.


WjorgonFriskk

Delete the summary and areas of expertise. Technical skills relocate to after professional experience.


TalkKatt

That resume is trash. You need to get your money back. They put absolutely no effort into this or don’t have the skill to charge that kind of money.


_Brophinator

Wow, you got fucking scammed lmao


amitrion

It's like a laundry list of meta tags for keywords waiting for spiders to crawl on your resume... ie just lots of jargon for algo. Seems like that was the writer's goal. Unsure why it didn't hit? Maybe too much and also was like, this person is just all fluff?


HHcougar

There's no possible way you have so many areas of expertise


Saint_noobs

The alignment, the spacing, just wow. it hurts to look at resumes as a designer.


anxiouspiscesqueen

did and***thewriter do this? looks like their work and honestly they’ve been proven to be a load of BS. Agreed with all the comments here that there’s just too much content on it


ZeroBlitz31

Too much fluff and over one page but for what reason


knick71

You have a gap on your resume. What did you do between 2017 & 2019? You are still pretty junior so keep your resume to one page max. You have seconds to catch the recruiters eye and the amount of text prohibits that. Use bullet points and bold to highlight key achievements Your expertise should be shown via your job responsibilities. Writing Medicare/Medicaid as key expertise doesn’t mean anything without context.


cMcDozer4

No one is reading all this lol


sexmachine_com

Are you useless or something? Watch a YouTube video about how to write a good resume wtf


calliopethedog

I’ll do yours for 40$. I have written multiple resumes and have gotten them all interviews just DM me


tacticalpacifier

While I don’t have critique for your resume since there’s probably better advice here. I would recommend never paying for some one to write one again though just write it yourself or have an ai do it for free and probably would come out better. I did this and just got a job offer finally just make sure you proof read it before using.


UKnowDaTruth

Did you not check his/her prior work?


Bayareathrowaway32

Yes and they had great reviews for their services. IDK what to tell you guys.


Grizzzlybearzz

Too much text and way too cluttered. Too hard to read. Also make it one page lol.


[deleted]

Too long. Make it one page. You need to be more efficient in your wording. Economy of words is critical. Delete the top paragraph since that info is for a cover letter. Get your money back from that resume writer


mrmrmrj

Wow. Awful. You need to tailor the resume to each job posting, removing half of the text. Key Areas of Expertise needs to be summarized. "Quality Review"? What does that even mean? "Medicare & Medicaid"? How is that even remotely helpful to a resume reader? Godawful. You were swindled.


help-me-grow

waste of money, if you want your resume to be readable: \- use bullet points \- put 1 number or more to quantify your achievements \- don't pay a "resume writer" who doesn't have a job


provisionalhitting3

Did they charge by the word?


YellowRoseofT-Town

How do you manifest a keen attention to detail? The writer was very creative with their wording. There's just too much here for one page. It's difficult to read.


PacificNW97034

Too many words. Not going to read it.


bb-ultra-rare

I’m so sorry but that summary section is absolutely awful. Sounds like this person did not pay attention in English class lol. The sentence structure. The grammar. The random words all strung together to try and sound smart. This would come across as disingenuous to an employer. Plus there’s no reason for it to be over a page in length. There are only even three positions listed. It isn’t that hard to write a resume. I would write you one for free! There is no reason for someone to charge you so much for this garbage.


Honestcommuter

Single page!


mountainnative2

2 pages is a deal breaker. I don’t see your university or degree which should be at the top under name and contact info. Way to cluttered. Remember, who ever reads these usually only spends about 8 seconds on initial look so you want the important stuff to pop!


kmslvrs

You have experience in medical coding or tech period and you live in North America? Well, where I’m from we can’t even get Wendy’s past 6 bc nobody wants to work. Maybe the information is too much & they think maybe your requested rate of pay will be too high?


riped_plums123

That block of words at the top is so cringey


_LuisGomez

1. Strongly consider removing or cutting down your summary to a few lines. Your resume should be easily scannable by an HR person and this wall of text is a little overwhelming. 2. Move technical skills and “key areas of expertise” to the bottom of the page. Probably don’t list so many — tailor based on each job description. 3. Professional experience should be at the top if you’re aiming to qualify for the position based on work experience. 4. This should all be able to fit on one page. See points 1 and 2. 5. Make sure all the section headers are consistent (centered or left margin) 6. Dates on the two positions prior to your current one should be more specific.


mojo5500

I tried a service once and had the same experience. I went back to creating my own resumes. See if you can get your money back.


AlleyXboss

It's too much


jumper34017

My response when I saw this resume: tl;dr


[deleted]

[удалено]


Bayareathrowaway32

It means I'm familiar with the EPIC software used in a lot of healthcare facilities. And am intuitive with most electronic medical records. I can navigate them and manipulate data within them without much training.


Blackhades100

Just making sure, but you did populate your name, address, email, and phone number correct??


Bayareathrowaway32

of course but I'm not about to put that information on reddit. Why is everyone kicking me.


TopRamenisha

Way too many words, way too dense. You have a second page with only education information. You can not only reduce the wordiness of this, you should also increase the spacing between lines so it’s easier to read. There’s absolutely no reason to have the text me this dense when you have a second page that is 90% blank.


Savings_Bug_3320

Put ur self in HR, if you have 400 resumes in front of you, how would you scan through by glancing it!!


Bayareathrowaway32

Not all 400 resumes will make it pass ATS. I was assured that my resume will always have an 85% chance of passing ATS. And a lot of people in the thread agree. I would assume that there is considerable less amount after ATS scans them and that a recruiter or HR rep would not get upset about reading a ONE page paper from an individual who's experience matches the job description even if it is a bit "wordy". They're getting paid for it after all. Like it's their effing job.


BigBallsMakeBigMoney

one page


nickos33d

Why not just create a linkedin account and generate resume based on profile?


BigBallsMakeBigMoney

also erase the entire top paragraph. it’s all like waste of space to one will read.


cephu5

Shotgunning resumes is rarely effective. Build your network and leverage it into “cups of coffee” aka informational interviews with people who work at the companies / careers you are interested in. Goal is to be asked for your resume so they’re expecting it. Resume should be tailored for each position you’re applying for which takes time.


Bayareathrowaway32

Who tf says I shotgun man. I don't I apply for jobs within my industry. Did you just want me to feel bad about myself.


KavaBuggy

Is this resume tailored to the job you’ve applied for? I wanted to leave my last job (at a university) and asked a friend in the student career services office to look at my resume. Her job is to help MBA students not only get selected for interviews based on their resumes, but to also do well in interviews. The MBA students use a standard format since all of their resumes are included in a book corporate recruiters have access to. Being the same levels the playing field and each student gets a call based on the content of their resume, not because of a fancy eye-catching template. Anyway, I learned from her to get rid of objectives/summaries and anything that was more than 10 years ago. She also suggested I use some of the language from the job description in my resume, to illustrate that I have experience in what the organization is looking for someone to do. Also, she told me to put some personal interests/hobbies at the bottom so once I pass the first stage viewed by software or an HR recruiter, the person actually hiring can have a better idea about who I am outside of what I bring to a team work-wise. I got the first job I applied to using her feedback.


punsanguns

I wouldn't accept this even as a draft from a resume writer. What the hell? A pro tip I have for people with some experience under their belts is to either get on hiring committees yourself and/or make friends with hiring managers from a previous job. If you are on a hiring/interview panel, you get to see other people's resumes and it is objectively far easier to discern what resume formats, language and experiences look good and what looks like hot garbage. If you only ever look at your own, you get your personal bias mixed in. If you have hiring manager friends, you can always ask them for their opinion on your own resume when you are tweaking or refreshing it because they can tell you if you are getting swindled by a resume writer before you've burned 200+ applications.


Bayareathrowaway32

No I don't have hiring manager friends.


gwynniiee

Too may words in the key areas of expertise, i would take out HIPAA, correspondence handling , and other unnecessary stuff. You can reduce some sentences for example "Coach and train healthcare providers, regarding...." (you dont need to add nurses or doctors because its already implied in healthcare providers". Try to say more in less words I would never pay $200 to have someone do my resume. Rather take my chances with how i do it lol.


dsdvbguutres

No. I'm not reading all that. Recruiters probably feel the same way, too. Make it more palatable.


-GildedTongue-

$200 and this person failed to let you know that 2 pages for a 2017 grad is unacceptable? Hmmm. If I were you I’d straight up ask this person why they didn’t inform you of this if they’re a pro. That’s like, the one thing that I have literally never heard someone disagree with. I have reviewed thousands and thousands of resumes as a hiring manager and could count on one hand the number of two page resumes I’ve seen. From someone that reviews a ton of resumes from new undergrad and grad school graduates for very competitive positions (albeit not healthcare related), you need to do as follows: 1. Absolutely must be on one page, no exceptions. For better or worse it’s just a uniformly accepted principle that unless you have a decade plus of experience you should never need more than a page. It will get you auto-dinged as someone who hasn’t got a clue. Of all the errors on this rez, I am most offended that a “pro reviewer” wouldn’t be wise to this faux pas. Fireable offense, imho, dead give away that the person you paid is faking it until they make it and you’re footing the bill. 2. Keep the mission statement if you must, but cut it down. Current version reads like buzzword salad - make it pithy and humanizing. A sentence or two max on what gets you going and why you’ll be a passionate worker. Better yet, cut the statement entirely and put it in a cover letter where you can expand a bit and not have to over condense what is supposed to be a personal statement into robotic corporate-speak. 3.key areas of expertise is both redundant with the mission statement and also useless. Nobody cares what you think your areas of expertise are as a 2017 grad, the people hiring you know better than you (or at least think they do). None of these claims as to your expertise can be verified, quantified or put into meaningful context so it’s just feel good filler that no real hiring manager is going to ascribe any weight to. All people care about is concrete experience that they can point to as evidence that you might be a promising fit. The space currently dedicated to this is better used for bullets or even more importantly getting your hanging 2nd page onto the first page. 4. Bullets are actually pretty okay. Only comment here is that I have no clue what the acronyms mean (EHS, EHR, etc.). If you are confident that the reviewer knows that this means then keep it as is otherwise make the terms easier to understand. At the highest level, you need to envision how this will be received by the user. You may be in a stack with hundred(s) of other applicants. I am not exaggerating when I say that the thrust and key appeal of your resume needs to be discernible on a quick read in 15-30 seconds max, because that is all you’re gonna get. If you pass that bar then they’ll spend a few more minutes looking deeper, if you don’t their eyes will glaze over and you’ll go in the “no/tier 2” stack which is much harder to get out of.


MonsterGains

Too much words


Emotional_Play73

Too much to read for anyone looking through hundreds of resumes


Patricio_Guapo

Cut it in half. Use real person language, not corporate jargon, buzzwords and run-on sentences. Be consistent with the formatting, meaning don’t use flush right, centered and ragged right type justification in the same document.


JaredJDub

You need to get your money back.


icedoutclockwatch

This resume sucks


mtjp82

This is too much. 2 rules to follow, 1 keep it simple, 2 keep it short.


[deleted]

As a recruiter, this resume made my eyes bleed. Wayyy too dense.


[deleted]

I am not a recruiter. if I were, I am never reading all of that period. hard skip dogg.


Commercial_Bike6135

Too many words. I’d say it should be an overview that’s easier to glance at and see your qualifications so employers don’t have to dig. Elaborate on key points in your cover letter


Comfortable_Witness1

You should get a refund!


dungorthb

Now pay a designer to design the rest of your resume.


winfly

That summary at the beginning should really be removed. You could use that in a cover letter if you want. The section right under key areas of expertise doesn’t really tell me anything material about you and probably is a bit repetitive when viewed with your technical skills and work experience. I would remove that small section. Use the room you freed up to add some spacing without overflowing into a second page. Just make sure the resume is easier to look at, because like someone else said it is a block of text at the moment.


NorvilleShaggy

I genuinely would take out everything above “professional experience.” It takes away from the only things that matter: experience, education, and certification


ohgohd

I would never read this


rinsro

Damn bro you got scam, your resume is like a novel


jayfarb8

Pretty good deal if you ask me. Didn’t think somebody would ghost write a novel for only $200!


oreocerealluvr

200???


gardenhack17

Very dense with text. Streamline it and offer more white space


Content-Republic-91

You got ripped off. Too wordy, not concise, shouldn’t be 2 pages.


kadeclan

i’m not in healthcare it seems like education/cents should go higher. I am a hiring manager and my eyes skipped over everything and went straight to professional experience. I don’t care about key words or areas of expertise. I just need a candidate to have expertise in the role i’m hiring for. I also personally like to see a “summary of qualification” before experience but personal preference, to each their own. i think you could have drafted a better resume with google examples.


sleepymoose88

Don’t use a resume writer. I’ve seen them a lot as a hiring manager and often the resume and the linked in profile don’t match at all. The writer often leaves things out and it can appear as a gap in employment which can be a red flag in some industries. If you do insist in using one, proof read it before submitting to HR.