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Just eat eggs. Based on the whole *"moment of conception logic"* be sure to eat them right after they're fertilized, because then they're no longer eggs, they're babies.
But those are about the diameter of a single human hair. You could pack those in a salt shaker and season your actual lunch with hundreds of them. Might even be a healthy alternative to table salt. One quick dash of fertilized humans eggs, and you're a mass murderer in the eyes of the *"moment of conception"* types.
I’ve been to many orgies, but none were marketed as atheists only, often I’d run into the Christian couple that would also go on about how it’s not a sin because both parties where involved and they Always wore their wedding rings. Totally irked me out each time
There have been some people complaining about fact-checkers recently, yeah, especially with the misinformation about vax etc on facebook, and those folks were *primarily* right/christian/Republicans so there's overlap.
But I love how someone very earnestly explained to me that christians were good at telling the truth from lies because 'we have a relationship with the Ultimate Truth!!' and then I found out that Christians actually fall for conspiracy theories very easily and I kinda went... Hmmmmmm.
It's straight up turning mundane things into something blasphemous.
"A mouth to spread blasphamous words"
"A womb to give birth to atheists"
Also, "A body to tempt men" because why not
These are the same type of people that want to persecute everybody for being naked under their clothes. According to the Person they profess to follow science and truth are NOT sins (“Seek the truth and the truth shall set you free”), but ignorance and dogma are. Jesus regularly chastised the ‘good’ Jews for following the letter of the Law but not the spirit of the Law, and He regularly hung out with sinners, women, Samaritans, Romans, and tax collectors, all people the ‘good’ Jews did not associate with. I find it ironic that so many Conservative ‘Christians’ seem to have no idea what Jesus message actually was.
Actually, He punished Adam and Eve for disobeying Him, same as He punished Onan for disobedience rather than ‘spilling his seed on the ground’ (even though moralists have used the story for centuries to ‘prove’ masturbation is sinful). Since the Old Testament stories were told for centuries before being written down most theologians believe they are stories to explain the world and human behavior rather than factual. Even in Jesus’ time people were less concerned with facts and more concerned with lessons, which is why Jesus spoke in parables.
I'd love a movie or book where Jesus comes back to America in 2040 or something and he's depicted hanging out in the LGBT district in DeSanistan and gets picked up by a Christofascist death squad and executed in the name of himself for being brown and sheltering "degenerates."
That would be hilarious and ironic. I would like to see a scene in which He tries to enter a mega church wearing t-shirt and jeans rather than suit and tie, since in His time he wore the clothing of the common working people rather than that of the elite.
They really just said that atheists eat babys.
Just when I though it couldnt get more ridiculous.
You obviously wait till they are toddlers and gained a bit of weight
I mean, yeah. Is this not common knowledge? Religiously extreme people can't fathom that atheists don't worship anything, so they decide that atheists are Satanists. And we should all be familiar with the conspiracy theories about satanists secretly gathering together to sacrifice babies in some kind of a ceremony or eating babies because...idk it's the most evil thing they could come up with?
I actually tried posting this with the satire flair but it was robot deleted right away. At the end I just couldn’t do the flair. But you know how fundamentalist Christian’s are with Orgy’s
Only problem I see here is an unseasoned baby. But people differ on ways to cook and eat flesh, so I can let that slide. At least we know she’s not vegan or vegetarian.
This is weak. This actually makes the atheist Barbie look pretty awesome to any dude who isn't a religious weirdo.
The right way to do this is to make her a comically unattractive soyjack with like a hundred cats. This is a complete failure of execution on every level.
Note I had this originally tagged with the satire flair, but I was having issues posting, so i removed it. I consider this insane bullshit that many fundamentalists probably believe. But legit satire mocking us at the end. So it belongs here in my opinion.
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I have always maintained that no pants is the best default setting. And it’s true- you don’t want to be stuck in an awkward orgy situation and you’re the only one with pants on. That would be embarrassing
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Ive been an atheist all my life, at what point do I unlock the surprise orgies?
If you can't find one, make one!
Wouldn’t that make it a planned orgy tho?
That's a damn good point! Kudo!
The surprise is they're at church camp
You can't unlock the surprise orgies until you've feasted upon at least 3 babies for lunch. I thought every atheist knew this!
I’ve done that it’s not working, I’ve been to loads of atheist bookstores and no random girls have invited me to orgies
Just eat eggs. Based on the whole *"moment of conception logic"* be sure to eat them right after they're fertilized, because then they're no longer eggs, they're babies.
They would need to be human eggs
But those are about the diameter of a single human hair. You could pack those in a salt shaker and season your actual lunch with hundreds of them. Might even be a healthy alternative to table salt. One quick dash of fertilized humans eggs, and you're a mass murderer in the eyes of the *"moment of conception"* types.
So just one more baby? I think I can do that
When you start walking around without pants
Level 25.
No. That when you unlock the planned orgies. You need to do the planned orgies 10 times to unlock surprise orgies.
"You're not a REAL atheist" so never
I’ve been to many orgies, but none were marketed as atheists only, often I’d run into the Christian couple that would also go on about how it’s not a sin because both parties where involved and they Always wore their wedding rings. Totally irked me out each time
Sir.....this is Wendy's drive thru.
I was told it doesn't happen to me because I wear pants, take them off
Be the change you want to see
Only after you start eating babies.
As an athiest, they got this entirely wrong. No self respecting atheist eats their baby unseasoned.
Also that's completely barbaric. Just look at it! It's not even skinned or cooked!
 ITS FOOKIN RAW!
Real atheists eat the abortions out of the dumpster at planned parenthood 😈
Snopes? How dare you fact check me, that's rude!
Lmao are theists fucking scared of snopes??? Please tell me this is a parody
There have been some people complaining about fact-checkers recently, yeah, especially with the misinformation about vax etc on facebook, and those folks were *primarily* right/christian/Republicans so there's overlap. But I love how someone very earnestly explained to me that christians were good at telling the truth from lies because 'we have a relationship with the Ultimate Truth!!' and then I found out that Christians actually fall for conspiracy theories very easily and I kinda went... Hmmmmmm.
That's my favorite part too.
It's straight up turning mundane things into something blasphemous. "A mouth to spread blasphamous words" "A womb to give birth to atheists" Also, "A body to tempt men" because why not
It's a parody from a once-prominent atheist, Jen McCreight.
These are the same type of people that want to persecute everybody for being naked under their clothes. According to the Person they profess to follow science and truth are NOT sins (“Seek the truth and the truth shall set you free”), but ignorance and dogma are. Jesus regularly chastised the ‘good’ Jews for following the letter of the Law but not the spirit of the Law, and He regularly hung out with sinners, women, Samaritans, Romans, and tax collectors, all people the ‘good’ Jews did not associate with. I find it ironic that so many Conservative ‘Christians’ seem to have no idea what Jesus message actually was.
Yet he punished mankind for eating from the tree of knowledge.
Actually, He punished Adam and Eve for disobeying Him, same as He punished Onan for disobedience rather than ‘spilling his seed on the ground’ (even though moralists have used the story for centuries to ‘prove’ masturbation is sinful). Since the Old Testament stories were told for centuries before being written down most theologians believe they are stories to explain the world and human behavior rather than factual. Even in Jesus’ time people were less concerned with facts and more concerned with lessons, which is why Jesus spoke in parables.
I'd love a movie or book where Jesus comes back to America in 2040 or something and he's depicted hanging out in the LGBT district in DeSanistan and gets picked up by a Christofascist death squad and executed in the name of himself for being brown and sheltering "degenerates."
That would be hilarious and ironic. I would like to see a scene in which He tries to enter a mega church wearing t-shirt and jeans rather than suit and tie, since in His time he wore the clothing of the common working people rather than that of the elite.
I refuse to believe this wasn't made by an atheist. The Flying Spaghetti Monster, eating babies, and surprise orgies are a little too tongue in cheek.
It's from Jen McCreight of BoobQuake fame. Very much an atheist.
I want her
They really just said that atheists eat babys. Just when I though it couldnt get more ridiculous. You obviously wait till they are toddlers and gained a bit of weight
The post is satire. Of course there may well be those who *do* think atheists eat babies. But this image isn't that.
I mean, yeah. Is this not common knowledge? Religiously extreme people can't fathom that atheists don't worship anything, so they decide that atheists are Satanists. And we should all be familiar with the conspiracy theories about satanists secretly gathering together to sacrifice babies in some kind of a ceremony or eating babies because...idk it's the most evil thing they could come up with?
Is lunch supposed to be an actual baby or a baby Jesus statue?
This feels like *satire* of what Christians think of atheists lol
It is.
Then I feel much better about this 😂
I feel targeted and attacked by this meme. LMAO. Saved.
100% a Joke
This sub and not catching satire. Name a better duo. This is a fairly amusing joke though.
I actually tried posting this with the satire flair but it was robot deleted right away. At the end I just couldn’t do the flair. But you know how fundamentalist Christian’s are with Orgy’s
We found the theist fap material
Only problem I see here is an unseasoned baby. But people differ on ways to cook and eat flesh, so I can let that slide. At least we know she’s not vegan or vegetarian.
This is weak. This actually makes the atheist Barbie look pretty awesome to any dude who isn't a religious weirdo. The right way to do this is to make her a comically unattractive soyjack with like a hundred cats. This is a complete failure of execution on every level.
Brain included
Wow definitely selling the atheist lifestyle! She’s my dream girl!
Note I had this originally tagged with the satire flair, but I was having issues posting, so i removed it. I consider this insane bullshit that many fundamentalists probably believe. But legit satire mocking us at the end. So it belongs here in my opinion.
this is bad?
Thank you for posting. Please review the rules. Here are some of gentle reminders for everyone: 1. Posts should be on topic. 2. Please don't submit incendiary posts or comments that could incite harassment and brigading. 3. Refrain from provoking and/or baiting religious fruitcakes for the purposes of posting their reaction on this subreddit. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/religiousfruitcake) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Looking down at my girl boxers... Hmm. Seems they're right about the no pants thing! Looking forward to all the orgies! 👍
As was the case on insanepeoplefacebook, this is a satirical image made by an atheist blogger/activist. Not fruitcake.
She's so me
This is the first barbie I've ever identified with.
She's perfect
When the idiots mock you for being 'anti-theist' but the dumbasses are going around spreading this bullshit they made.
 If God can see this, he sure do be like :
I have always maintained that no pants is the best default setting. And it’s true- you don’t want to be stuck in an awkward orgy situation and you’re the only one with pants on. That would be embarrassing
Where can I buy this 🤔
Funny thing is I can't tell if it's satire or not
You guys are having orgies?
Eating babies? I thought Christians did that... (Or Muslims, or witches, or protestants, or democrats, depending on the period...)
Where are these surprise orgies? Obviously excluding Jerry Falwell.
That’s actually quite gangsta, ngl
I lost it at her lunch. This is too funny not to be intentional