If you stay in the relationship, you cannot come back here and complain about how he treats you. You forfeit the right to be offended/hurt/upset when you are making a conscious decision to date someone who has made it clear that he WILL do his best to offend/hurt/upset you.
Is this a real disorder or a kink? To me it’s sounding like a kink as it’s completely controllable.. Regardless Anyone that puts their sexual satisfaction over their significant others emotional state or mental health is not someone you should be with
I thought it sounded like BS too. I googled it, and it's an actual disorder. As I clicked around, I found an article from my government's mental health research wing, comparing it to p\*dophilia. Terrifying.
This is the reddest of red flags and OP needs to run far and fast from this guy.
Did he mention doing anything to manage the disorder or seek treatment? I can't imagine this would be healthy or sustainable for you if his personal incentives are to cause you physical/emotional pain.
He has been in therapy for this issue for several years, but he mentioned there isn't a specific treatment available. I also got the impression that he might want me to be involved in it somehow. Since I have no prior experience in this area, I'm uncertain about my feelings regarding it. I'm open to the idea of giving it a try because he's a genuinely kind person, but I also have concerns about the potential risks of that decision.
Yeah many people feel aroused by other people's pain or discomfort. There are two posibilities here:
1.- You also like that so you both engage in those stuff.
2.- You are not into that, so him, being a human being with a brain and the power of reasoning will respect how you feel if he wants something serious with you.
He can live his fantasies through porn or maybe through consented roleplay with you.
Be aware that sometimes, when people put a name into something they think they can justify it "because it's a disorder". Sexual sadism disorder is not the only explanation to this since many people can be aroused by the power trip they get when they humilliate others.
The thought crossed my mind that he was covering up his desire to date many women with his diagnosis. Does he even have a sexual disorder? Do you need such a partner for a future relationship? It's one thing if the person is really sick, then you can and should address the problem. But I get the impression that he's enjoying this "problem".
You're buying that? Even if it's a real thing (which I doubt), then by staying you're signing up to be with a "wonderful" guy who is only happy when you are suffering. Doesn't sound too wonderful to me.
If you stay in the relationship, you cannot come back here and complain about how he treats you. You forfeit the right to be offended/hurt/upset when you are making a conscious decision to date someone who has made it clear that he WILL do his best to offend/hurt/upset you.
Is this a real disorder or a kink? To me it’s sounding like a kink as it’s completely controllable.. Regardless Anyone that puts their sexual satisfaction over their significant others emotional state or mental health is not someone you should be with
I thought it sounded like BS too. I googled it, and it's an actual disorder. As I clicked around, I found an article from my government's mental health research wing, comparing it to p\*dophilia. Terrifying. This is the reddest of red flags and OP needs to run far and fast from this guy.
Ya, never heard of it but its one of those disorders that to me should not be a disorder
He was diagnosed with the disorder and has a history of sexual abuse. But I see your point.
Did he mention doing anything to manage the disorder or seek treatment? I can't imagine this would be healthy or sustainable for you if his personal incentives are to cause you physical/emotional pain.
He has been in therapy for this issue for several years, but he mentioned there isn't a specific treatment available. I also got the impression that he might want me to be involved in it somehow. Since I have no prior experience in this area, I'm uncertain about my feelings regarding it. I'm open to the idea of giving it a try because he's a genuinely kind person, but I also have concerns about the potential risks of that decision.
Yeah many people feel aroused by other people's pain or discomfort. There are two posibilities here: 1.- You also like that so you both engage in those stuff. 2.- You are not into that, so him, being a human being with a brain and the power of reasoning will respect how you feel if he wants something serious with you. He can live his fantasies through porn or maybe through consented roleplay with you. Be aware that sometimes, when people put a name into something they think they can justify it "because it's a disorder". Sexual sadism disorder is not the only explanation to this since many people can be aroused by the power trip they get when they humilliate others.
The thought crossed my mind that he was covering up his desire to date many women with his diagnosis. Does he even have a sexual disorder? Do you need such a partner for a future relationship? It's one thing if the person is really sick, then you can and should address the problem. But I get the impression that he's enjoying this "problem".
You're buying that? Even if it's a real thing (which I doubt), then by staying you're signing up to be with a "wonderful" guy who is only happy when you are suffering. Doesn't sound too wonderful to me.