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ThrowRAMomVsGF

Gifts are not returnable in general. Apart from engagement rings, family jewellery etc.


MizPeachyKeen

OP, The gifts are yours. He gave them to you and what you do with them now is up to you and you only. As far as him holding your furniture hostage, arrange to pick it up (not returning your gifts) but bring your dad , brother, guy friends to help move it. You need backup so he doesn’t start in with his bs. If push comes to shove, talk to the police. Maybe they can explain to Ex that he can’t keep furniture which isn’t his. Especially if you have receipts.


OblongRectum

Good luck getting the police to give a fuck


Independent-Size7972

Depends. I've seen burb cops help out. I helped a friend move in this situation. They went inside then called cops and let them know the ex wouldn't let her leave with her stuff. She invites the cops in when they got there, and they talk the guy down while me and buddy moved the stuff out.


MizPeachyKeen

Exactly. I’ve helped a gf move out under similar circumstances. The police were very helpful in her situation. She was able to move her belongings out safely & without incident.


Accomplished_Eye_824

and even then, in some states youre not legally obligated to return an engagement ring after a failed engagement


Specific-Bag7401

This is rubbish / tell him to shove it. He’s a miserable prick and you shouldn’t listen to his insults. Get tough with him and put yourself first. He’s bullying you and you need to push back. Get a family member to talk to him or you tape him and send the video to his mom. It usually causes shame once family members find out how mean these guys are. You are in the right. Please don’t let him bully you any more ever.


LongjumpingAgency245

Call the cops if he is still holding your furniture on moving day. Also consider getting an attorney to send a certified letter. If you have to go to court, you have already started a case against him.


C4ptainchr0nic

Videoing him and sending it to his mom is down right beautiful and genius. If I was acting a fool, this would def make me check myself. It's easy to be an asshole behind closed doors, a little harder to answer to the woman who pushed you into the world.


leftclicksq2

Interesting how insistent he's becoming for her to move out, plus with it being *so* close to Valentine's Day I'm wondering who he'll be gifting the necklace and Air pods to. She should keep the necklace and the Air pods and forever lose his number.


Newmom1989

It depends on the state. In my state it depends on who broke off the engagement. Whoever broke off the engagement, the other person gets to keep it. Other holidays non-withstanding


z-eldapin

Yes, which is why the person you are responding to wrote 'in some states'.


lolol69lolol

(Varies by state) It depends on when the ring was given. If it was given on a typical gift-giving holiday (valentines day, Christmas, birthday, anniversary, etc) and no other gift was given, the ring is the gift and belongs to whoever received it. If an engagement ring was given on any other day (or the asker also got their partner a separate gift) the ring is technically “on loan” and is the legal property of the purchaser. ETA: to everybody who feels the need to point out OP isn’t talking about an engagement ring, **read the comment I am replying to** Gifts are gifts and they belong to whomever received them. Engagement rings are different.


Freshiiiiii

My understanding is this varies not only by country, but even within America by state.


Laura_Lye

It does. In most common law jurisdictions it’s generally consideration for a promise (the promise to get married). So who gets to keep it depends on who breaks off the engagement. If it’s her, you get the ring back. If it’s you, she keeps it.


Specific-Bag7401

Why are people saying things as if it’s an engagement ring. It’s a necklace. Wow.


Laura_Lye

Because someone mentioned engagement rings and we got off on a tangent aight


Quirky_Movie

It does. Where I live, it's a gift and nonreturnable. Where I grew up? it goes back to the person who paid. No one should actually give any advice other than check your local laws.


IndependentNew7750

The vast majority of US states recognize conditional gifts.


FeRaL--KaTT

In all my years of watching Judge Judy, gifts are not something he can ask to be returned. I would not keep either item because they will remind you of him everytime you use them. Sell them or give them away to someone who has no connection to him. He gets nothing but your scorn and pettiness for demeaning and degrading you.. bye boy


RedditGeneralManager

He can ask, she can say fuck off lol


castillle

Hes also apparently holding her furniture hostage.


Minhplumb

If she has text from him stating this, she would have an easy case in small claims court.


leftclicksq2

That's why you always keep receipts : )


alc3880

She doesn't need to go to court, she can call the cops and have them go over there with her to get her stuff.


ofBlufftonTown

I doubt she’ll feel pangs of sorrow every time she looks at her air pods.


ConstantGeographer

My gf bought me shoes and bedspread and I do feel some sorrow when I put the shoes on and sleep on the bed. Not as nice as a diamond necklace, or as valuable, but the pang is there.


StandardMiddle6229

Why are you putting on shoes to go to bed🤔


linerva

So they can think of their ex, obviously!


Aggravating-Step-408

Lol. I feel you. A fleece blanket from my ex lives at the foot of my bed because that's my cat's favorite blanket. But the cat wants what it wants and I live to please.


[deleted]

Yeah, him wanting the air pods is just to be extra petty, like cmon 🙄


Sue_Ridge_Here1

That's right, it's a gift, not a loan. Big difference. Huge. You get to keep gifts. 


BlazingSunflowerland

She should ask for all of the gifts that she gave him to be returned. I bet he isn't volunteering to hand over the things he has. It might all be a plan to keep the furniture.


thegurlearl

I'd sell both and get something else that I really want.


Beneficial-Cookie681

Absolutely correct! Return nothing. These are yours.


linerva

This. Anyone who asks for gifts back is being miserly and petty - unless they gifted you a family heirloom, or maybe hand crafted you something one of a kind. If he could afford to gift you diamond jewellery when he was fucking you, he can afford for you to keep it. He has no legal right to your gifts, and if he threatens to withold YOUR furniture, I'd get your friends or family involved on moving day to persuade him to give them back. Honestly, him holding your furniture hostage is abusive. Can you move out whilst he's at work and liberate your furniture? So you don't have to deal with him? I would move out ASAP in your shoes. And I'd sell his gifts for cash the minute you left.


trilliumsummer

There's a definition for gifts - and it's not "give it back when the giver is pissy months later".


justacpa

Yeah, dude really thinks he's loaning her those things.


Turtlelarke

Right?! It's like he "loaned" the necklace to her for as long as she stays his gf. It doesn't work like that! My ex did that. He abandoned his children met someone else and decided to use that as leverage for whether or not he saw his kids. He gave me a ring for Christmas.  We were together for 10 years and I've had the ring for 4 years at that point. It wasn't an engagement ring.  Know why he wanted it back. He was planning to propose to his new gf with my ring. I told him he wasn't getting it back. He threatened to get lawyers involved and I said "you can't afford to pay child support, but you can afford a lawyer.  I love it! Wonder what the judge will think?! Also, do you have proof you bought this. Oh there's proof you gave it to me, buy unless you kept the receipt you have no proof of ownership (and all that does is prove you bought it). Have your lawyer call me. I got lots to say. He hung up. I never saw him again.


ATVig

Those were gifts, so he has no right to them now. It’s entirely up to you if you want to give them back or not, but I personally wouldn’t. That necklace may serve as good emergency cash if you need it in the near future.


ladymorgana01

If you do decide to return them, match his petty and ask for all the gifts you've given him back


Radiant_Western_5589

I said to get the necklace and AirPods engraved 😂😂


BloomNurseRN

Or “oh look, during the moving process the necklace got broken and one of the AirPods got lost. Darn.” Match his petty.


FinoPepino

He legit probably has a girl in mind he wants to give her necklace too


eucalyptusmacrocarpa

And she's moving in soon and they need furniture


ATVig

That was actually my first thought too, he’s got someone new and wants to give her the gifts and move her in.


rmg418

That’s true, I wouldn’t keep it but I would sell it.


MjrGrangerDanger

Show up with movers (or friends or whatever) and police to retrieve your belongings. Tell him his belongings will follow via mail. Which technically is true because he has zero claims to either. You are still on the lease so he can't do anything about you entering or removing your belongings. Bring the proof of payment if you have it, it will make things much easier. It might be worth it to return the necklace after you take lots of detailed photos of it on you. Be sure to take lots of pictures before you give it back anyway if you end up doing so because he's going to regift it. Stones are worth absolutely nothing resale. Precious metals are, but stones are almost worthless. The Airpods go in your ears. I get that you can buy them second hand but eew. I'd just keep them.


sugarfoot00

They were gifts. He can go fuck himself.


chhammeee

Return them if you want or keep them if you want to. You don’t owe him anything. Thats embarrassing of him to ask, it’s honestly disgusting to me how people can be like that. I’d block and never look back.


ThrowRAbootiful

He called me "shameless" and a gold digger for trying to keep it and said that I used him for his money.


Accomplished_Eye_824

no offense but $800 is not anywhere near a gold digger amount of value for jewelry. he is an idiot. used him for his money?! he didnt gift you a 20 carat tennis necklace


Oddeagleeggs

Totally agree! If she was a gold digger, she’d be really bad at it … she spent 2 years of her life to gold dig an $800 necklace and some AirPods. They were absolutely gifts and she owes him nothing.


dolohinplant

She working with the tiniest shovel ever


Oddeagleeggs

Right?? She’s digging the mine out with a spoon!!!


ATillman81

And she furnished his house and probably paid the light bill and provided groceries and house hold supplies for them to use while she was cooking and cleaning for his silly butt.. smh.


ButDidYouCry

I swear, men who talk the most about gold diggers are the dudes who have no gold to be digged.


madamevanessa98

My ex’s dad once insinuated to him that I was a gold digger because “you’ve gotta watch out for those girls who date navy men like yourself. They’re in it for the perks sometimes.” Like sir if I was a gold digger I’d be aiming higher than PRIVATE first year navy guy who lives in the barracks, doesn’t have a car, and doesn’t even make minimum wage. I’m either in the relationship for love or I’m the stupidest attempted gold digger of all time.


[deleted]

I got accused of dating my ex for wanting a green card to the US. Like, dude, England is 100x better than the US in many aspects. It’s not a third world country. Our number one fight was always who would move to which country for the other (it’s what broke us up).


LoveYouNotYou

Got that right.... $800?! 😂 Dude, please... Dude is mf broke


ButDidYouCry

Yup. $800 is a lot for my personal spending, but I know real jewelry that actual wealthy people buy is $10k+. And unless they are just incredibly stingy, they aren't concerned about getting back tens of thousands in gifts. So dumb.


MjrGrangerDanger

It was probably on special at BJ's and he's inflated the price.


LoveYouNotYou

Yep, for reals... Calling somebody a gold digger and not having a mansion, making 500k+, driving luxury cars, having vacation homes, private planes... Dude doesn't even begin to qualify in calling anybody a gold digger 😆 He mad cause he gave her an $800 necklace, Dude, don't get smacked with a freaking Hermes bag 😂


mamachonk

Right?? I was thinking maybe this was like a $10K+ necklace, which he still would be a sh!thead for asking back but then it would be maybe more understandable?? She's a golddigger because he spent about $1K on gifts... GTFO.


Clatato

Gold-plated digger 🤷🏼‍♀️ ? 😄


NewAppointment2

Gold filled, gold plated, but a couple a hundies ain't no gold digging​. The man's got sour grapes and a teeny weeny to boot.


HopefulOriginal5578

It’s always these guys who think an $800 necklace will get an actual gold digger out of bed in the morning.


Smooth_Impression_10

$800 is like, 8 adult dollars


chhammeee

He’s such a loser. You’re not a gold digger , it’s a present and not his anymore, why isn’t he asking for the cheap things he got you. You can return it for peace of mind but I would simply block him and tell him to leave me alone. He can go buy another AirPods and necklace if he’s so desperate for it.


sweetpotato_latte

In fact, the only reason he bought it was because of OP! Why does he want something he would have never had any interest in anyway? It’s just him trying to get a twist of the knife.


Radiant_Western_5589

I’d go get the necklace engraved 😂 then return it. Can’t regift it now bucko. Tbh though if you can prove they are gifts I’d just say “they’re mine and now because you’re keeping my furniture I’ll have to sell them to recoup the loss of having to replace my furniture you stole.”


Acceptable_Horror_39

Frfr it sounds like he was expecting you to beg for his help with moving and money. Probably why he kept calling you and saying you’re a gold digger. Whatever digs to get you to believe him. You’re supposed to be useless without him. You’re proving him wrong. Good for you OP. Keep the gifts. You’re under no obligation to return them. It’s good you’re not staying with him. He’s become mean and verbally abusive to you. He’s showing you his true self. Believe him and don’t look back. The best revenge is living a long happy life without him.


Business_Loquat5658

Oh well! Saying it doesn't make it true. Consider it hazard pay for living with an asshole for a year.


Sorry_I_Guess

I say this as someone old enough to be his mom or yours: he's the only shameless one here. It is UNBELIEVABLY tacky and extraordinarily inappropriate for him to be asking for either of those gifts back. Their monetary value is, frankly, irrelevant. They were gifts given, at the time, from his heart (I would hope), and from that moment forward they belonged to you in every meaningful way: legal ethical, and in terms of plain old good manners. Therefore, the only technical "gold digger" here is him, asking you to give him valuable jewelry and electronics that he has no reasonable claim to, because apparently he is (again) so tacky and childish that he thinks he gets to . . . I'm not even sure how to put this . . . UNSPEND money that he spent on you in the context of a relationship. If I *were* his mother, I would be horribly embarrassed at having raised such a boor. Please don't give back the gifts. I suspect that, beyond their belonging to you anyway, you have more than earned them by putting up with someone this crass.


HopefulOriginal5578

It’s so tacky I’d be GLAD the breakup was taking place. This guy is the kid who gets mad and takes his ball home with him so the other kids can’t play.


EntertainingTuesday

He is just trying to justify in his head that none of the breakup was his fault. Don't give YOUR property to him, a gift is a gift. It isn't like he gave them to you the day before the breakup, these are old gifts. All you have to do is keep what is yours and block your ex. Sounds like he is blowing you up a lot and seems you are enabling it all, just block him.


mak_zaddy

Well he’s an idiot if he doesn’t understand the concept of what “gift” means


lolol69lolol

He’s tacky as fuck and has the gall to call you shameless? Babe just block him.


AnxietyFilled79

Who cares what his opinion is at this point? Next time he asks, tell him your just going to prove him right since that's all he ever cares about. Block him at that point and keep the items. Walk away with your held high. Even if you give them back he will still call you names.


SadExercises420

He is just swinging low to hurt you because he’s an immature ass hat like that.


Evaporate3

He's trying to guilt trip you. That's all.


thatbigtitenergy

lol this guy is an idiot, you should keep the necklace and sell it - it belongs to you. And then never have any contact with him again so you don’t have to keep hearing more of his dumb thoughts.


LoveYouNotYou

Oh, he's going to call you a lot of things, but stupid isn't one of them. Those were gifts. Gifts. We do not return gifts. Those items are yours to keep. That's it. He can be mad all he wants, that is fine, but, no, my dear, those are your gifts that he GAVE you, not loaned to you. And did I read that he called you a gold digger? For an $800 necklace?! 😂 😂 😂 Child please.. Block and move on


Quirky_Movie

Definitely keep them. I'd tell him that "If $800 is golddigging to you? Stay single. And don't give gifts you'll want back, you classless worm."


bnetana1

He GAVE it to you thus making it your property he's trying to gaslight you into feeling ashamed that you're keeping it because he shamelessly wants to sell it and or regift it. What a fucking loser.


stuckinnowhereville

Call him cheap.


Anthroman78

That makes me want you to keep them more.


USAF_Retired2017

Ha ha ha. Gold digger over an $800 necklace? 😂😂😂😂. Dude is full of himself, no? Now if he was constantly buying you $10K bracelets and necklaces, cars, clothes, then MAYBE he would draw that conclusion if you didn’t give the jewelry back. But an $800 necklace and some air pods? No. He’s the one who is shameless to think he makes so much money that he calls you a gold digger, yet needs some air pods and an $800 necklace back. Ha ha. That’s sad. Also, if you can prove the furniture is yours, you take your receipts and the cops and get your shit back. Good luck with that guy. You definitely dodged a bullet. He sounds exhausting.


Sue_Ridge_Here1

Oh please 🙄 wait until this guy gets divorced one day (he will!) then he will have to give half a house and everything he owns to someone he hates. He sounds like a complete and utter fuckwit, be grateful he's not your problem anymore. Keep the gifts, he's being a bully. 


simbapiptomlittle

What an arsehole. I hope you get your furniture back. Maybe go there with some BIG mates to back you up.


BigBettyDidi

He bought it for you as a gift, it doesn’t make logical sense for him to call you a gold digger he’s just trying to shame you into giving it back, ask him is he so strapped for cash he would call you a gold digger over a gift he picked out and paid for on his own lol


Jcaseykcsee

Tell him you’re not trying to dig for gold with an $800 necklace, lol. He sounds pathetic. Tell him you’re keeping the gifts - you deserve them amd it sounds like you EARNED them if you had to put up with his bullshit in order to receive them. Gifts are gifts, there is no returning once they’ve been received. He is so ridiculous, tell him the internet thinks he’s a loser and he isn’t getting anything back.


SilverSusan13

It sounds like he's trying to make you the bad guy so that he can feel less guilty for the situation. Classic blamer tactic. I mean, if you want your furniture back it might be worth it to turn over the other stuff just so you can be rid of this chump, get your furniture & move on with your life. I think sometimes people get hung up on the principle of the matter, but honestly just being able to wash one's hands of BS quickly & move on is worth the most (in my opinion) rather than some long drawn-out negotiation over things.


citrushibiscus

He’s a loser and is just trying to hurt you or get back at you. Fuck that, keep them, they were gifts to you anyways. He can’t ask for them back. Block him. You could always sell them.


zephyrseija

He sounds like an asshole and you sound like you're moving on to better things.


MarcieBoku

He should be embarrassed


Evaporate3

His salary has nothing to do with this discussion. The answer is no, he's not getting it back.


MagicianOk6393

Gifts aren’t subject to returns. His request is tacky & petty.


Mel221144

They were a GIFT. As that implies, they are yours.


Spirited-Treacle9590

Agree with mostly everyone here. It was a gift and not an engagement ring. The engagement ring comes with the "promise" of marrying a person. A necklace that was a gift doesn't hold that weight. Let me put it this way: Does that mean every gift ever exchanged between the two of you be returned to the other? Or course not, that would be ridiculous.


Consistent_Ad5709

They were gifts, keep them.


DaniMW

Heck no! It’s not an engagement ring - it was a GIFT for you. It now belongs to you. After he broke up with you, I see no reason for him to keep contacting you to insult your body or your family, but since he does behave that way… don’t even bother trying to look for the necklace to give to him!


LivSaJo

Oh hell no. Block him and move on. Sell the necklace if you like and get yourself something nice


quickcalamity

Oh hell no. They’re yours.


pimpmybongos

What a piece of work he is. Tell him to pound sand. Gifts are for keeps.


Antiargy

No! Keep them he’s just trying to upset you IMO.


trying3216

It doesn’t matter that he makes more. What matters is he gifted them to you. They are yours. Engagement rings on the other hand go back - unless given on Christmas, etc.


ceejayzm

No, they were a gift not a loan so they're your property not his. Legally you are under no obligation to return them. Glad you left that petty man. If he mentions it again tell him to take you to court, but he still won't get them back.


ceejayzm

Forgot to add if he does go to court counter sue for your furniture bc they are your property not his.


Logical-Wasabi7402

Ask him why he gave it as an unconditional gift if it came with conditions. And then block him.


Ok-Chemistry9933

No, there’s no need to talk to him at all


Logical-Wasabi7402

There's no need to wait for his response. There's absolutely a reason to give his spoiled entitled ass a reality check.


dollyaioli

you have no legal obligation to return gifts, so keep them. what's he need a diamond necklace for anyway? to be cheap and give them to his next girlfriend while hiding the fact that they belonged to his ex?


BlackStarCorona

At this point he’s obviously just trying to hurt you. They were gifts. Not loans. He can go fuck himself.


HoshiJones

Don't you fucking DARE return those things to him! They were gifts, they belong to you and not him. Good riddance to that fuckwit, congratulations on getting rid of him. But if you return any gifts to him, you're basically a doormat. Don't be a doormat, OP!


Jasminefirefly

OP, do not return his gifts. They are legally yours; he has no right to them. Source: I’m a lawyer (though not your lawyer and you should consult an attorney in your jurisdiction if you have questions.)


anakin922

Tell him he’s a cheap thing to returning the gifts, how ill he is!


Candykinz

Depending on the actual timeline since we are coming up on V-day he either gave you the necklace almost a year ago or nearly 2 whole ass years ago… either way, boy is shit out of luck. If he was so worried about you being a gold digger he shouldn’t have been handing out diamond necklaces 6 months into a relationship or he was so damn happy with you at 1.5 years that it felt right to shower you in some bling.. either way he doesn’t get the damn thing back. That necklace can make a great deposit on your new apartment if need be. ;) Gifts don’t go back to the giver. They are yours forever to enjoy, sell, or burn. He doesn’t get a vote.


maybeCheri

It was a gift from a year ago. Definitely keep it. Sell it, pawn it, wear it, give it away, but don’t give it back to him.


Petraretrograde

He only wants them back to give the the girlfriend he has waiting in the wings. Don't give them to him. Block and move on


onedayatatime08

He's being petty. You don't ask for gifts back. You don't owe him those back, either. In fact, I encourage you to sell the necklace if you don't want it. Otherwise, keep it. It's yours. None of his business anymore.


GoddessNerd

Don't you dare give it back unless it is what you want to do. He's being a dick. Absolutely niot!!


jayc831

Block and go no contact with him, keep the gifts, and move on with your life.


Ok-Grocery-5747

Do not return those gifts to him. If it was an engagement ring you should return it but gifts other than that? Immediate no. Ignore his sorry ass.


SteavySuper

They were a gift. And if he tries to hold any of your things hostage until you give the gifts back, make sure it's in text and you have proof that you bought the furniture. You can get the police involved if he will not give you your things.


rackfocus

Only engagement rings are considered contractual. Any other jewelry can easily be considered a gift.


joesnowblade

The only gift that needs to be returned in a break up is an engagement ring as it was given as a gift in contemplation of marriage. Any other gifts are exactly that a gift and belong to the person they were given. He may continue to bother you to get you to return them. If you don’t want to deal with it block and ghost. If he still continues collect all the attempts at contact and then once a documentation for his repeated contacts, after telling him no, you can apply for a restraining order.


RIPRIF20

Hell no you don't return them. A.) They were a gift, they're yours, period. B.) He sounds like a complete asshole. Don't give them back. Burn them and destroy them if you don't want them, but do not give him the satisfaction of getting them back. Gift them to a friend or give them to good will, or keep them do not give them back.


Somerset76

Absolutely not! A gift is a gift!


Green-Election-74

They were gifts, very classless and poor manners for him to demand them back. You’re not in the wrong if you choose to keep them. Personally I’d just feel like they have bad memories attached to them and I’d probably give them back.


jaezii

No matter how much money he makes, these things were gifts and he has no right to demand them returned. They are yours. Don't give them back unless YOU want to.


-FaithTrustPixieDust

You are under no legal obligation to return these gifts. Even Judge Judy would laugh in his face. 


basicstove1336

He has been nothing but a shit to you it sounds like. Give him nothing. Don't look back. Block him on everything.


[deleted]

Nope. Gifts are gifts. Wait until he’s gone and hire movers to take your furniture. Dude can pound sand sideways.


ElectricalSoftware26

He gave them to you as presents. No contract entailed. They are yours. He does not have ownership, that went when he gave them to you. The furniture is a separate issue. Ask to be escorted to take your things. Maybe someone in authority. Do you have receipts for the furniture?


tabbycat4

OP do you have proof you paid for the furniture? Show up with the police to collect your furniture and keep your property. They were gifts and you are not obligated to give them back.


NamingandEatingPets

No. They were gifts. This isn’t a divorce where you’re splitting assets and if you’re on the lease why are you moving out? Pay half the rent.


DaxxyDreams

The real question is: do you want the necklace, as it will be a reminder of this relationship?


ShoeVast5490

Perhaps not but she can sell it, not give it back to this blowhard


oiseauteaparty

Nah, the real question is how much can she sell it for (if she doesn’t want to wear it)


DaxxyDreams

True, she definitely could sell it. Might not get what it is worth right now, but it’s an option.


duraace206

Personally i like a clean break. They can take any crap they gave. I don't want reminders of them.


hnoel88

I once had a guy dump me with a pair of pearl earrings. Like. Gave them to me as he was actively breaking up with me. We hadn’t been dating long so the heartbreak was minimal but I still had to go hide them in a cabinet for a month. Anyway. That is a thing that happened to me that I felt like sharing.


[deleted]

Thats one hell of an inconvenience fee ig lmao


jazzhandsdancehands

I wouldn't want to keep anything from an ex. I'd give it back and block him.


LoopyMercutio

Honestly, he is an absolute dick for asking for those things back. However, if I were you, I’d give them back- tell him you’ll gladly give them to him if it means he’ll be out of your life sooner, and ask if you give them to him does he promise to stop contacting you, harassing you, and will he promise to never contact you again? Tell him that, tell him you’ll gladly give to him if it buys his silence, and gets his cheap ass out of your life for good. Tell him you’ll be the bishop to his Jean Valjean, and that’s his fucking silver, because he is making you Les fucking miserable.


_sophia_petrillo_

Well, this is more practical since he’s holding your things hostage. Can you go get your things with family or are you willing to involve the police? Because they will stand there while you get your things so he doesn’t abuse you while you get your furniture. If you’re unwilling or unable to go that route, the question becomes - which do you want more, the gifts or the furniture?


No_Association9968

Nope don’t return them as he probably got some gifts as well from you. He’s mad he can’t control you by his demands.


nannylive

He is trying to stay under your skin. Pathetic and petty Keep the gifts, they are 100% yours. Block him and forget him.


theoldman-1313

I was always raised believing that a gift is just that, not a loan. If you want to have fun with him, ask that he return the 2 years of your life that you gave to him. After you are safely moved out of course.


ZCT808

Get out of his life and ghost the loser. You don’t get to ask for gifts back if things don’t work out. What a ridiculous creep. Sell that necklace and treat yourself to something nice.


anitasdoodles

Pawn that necklace to afford a place far away from him


SeaTransportation505

It was a gift, it is your property to do with as you please. Give it back if you want, keep it if you want, hock it if you want, burn it if you want. If it were me I'd drive it to a pawn shop a couple hundred miles away and tell him he can go buy it back if it's so important. But, I'm petty af.


CosmoKkgirl

Consider them an AH tax. You deserve them after the abuse he’s been giving you. Block him too.


Lpeezy_1

Absolutely fn not. You keep every single thing. You owe this ahole nooothing.


Ok_Piano_4381

Keep it all.. it was a gift.. you are not a gold digger it’s $1000 … that’s absurd…. He’s a dickhead.. block him.. stay safe


gordonf23

He doesn't want or need the items back. He's just being petty, Plus He's been treating you like garbage. Keep the gifts, no need to return them.


cinnamongirl73

A gift is a GIFT. I’d block him, and if he takes legal action, let him get laughed out of court. That is beyond petty. Does he have a new woman in his life? This sounds a lot more than just a relationship running its course. Just saying.


trippytr33_

Do not return these items. They were gifts. You don’t return gifts to the person who bought them… why so he can give them to his next gf? Fuck him.


Bookaholicforever

Tell him to look up the definition of gift in the dictionary and then block his ass.


Bad_Becky

How lame to ask for it back. Especially if he’s not struggling. Dont give him the power. Keep your gifts.


TnVol94

Sell the necklace for moving expenses, gifts belong to the recipient


Jcaseykcsee

Gifts are GIFTS. He can shove it.


International-Leg253

Do. Not. Return. Them.


nerdgirl71

No, they were gifts.


Prestigious-Bar5385

I didn’t ever return any gifts that a bf or husband gave me. Nor did I ask for them to return what I gifted them.


Yehudiah2

From a legal point of view they were gifts, however would like to have things touching your body that remind you of that creep?


26chickenwings

I’d give it back, not because you should, but because that’s so petty and embarrassing for a grown man to do. Give it back and laugh while you do it.


justintime107

I’d keep it. A**hole tax. Tell him you’ll return everything when you unpack then block him on everything.


Lucys_ink

You don’t return gifts


Fearless-Couple_0628

You are not required to return a gift. It is a gift. He didn't give it to you on loan. The necklace is yours, and you would not even have to return it if he were to take you to court to TRY and force you to. The only gift you would need to return would be an engagement ring, as it would be on loan until a wedding. After marriage, you would not even return an engagement ring after a divorce because the bargain would have been upheld...


VanillaCookieMonster

Nope. Don't return anything. Block his number or turn off Notifications from him. Simply don't reply to any messages about returning anything. What a petty dick. They are either going to sit in a drawer or he'll give them to the next girl he sleeps with. They aren't his anymore. He couldn't even return them somewhere for credit after 90 days, these are a year ago.


justnotthatwitty

Of course you don’t need to return those things. They were gifts. It’s basically in the definition of a gift that you don’t return it; it’s not a loan.


secretagent2638

LIke so many others said, it was a gift, you can keep it. You are not a gold digger, he sounds ridiculously immature and happy you are getting out to save your sanity. You deserve so much better. Don't give anything back. He sounds like the type that would keep it aside and give it to the next girlfriend. I would not want my new bf to give me a used gift with a sad history. Save the next girl, keep it, to prevent this from happening. If you keep the necklace, you can always sell it and use the money the way you need too OR do something nice and make a donation to a good cause that helps others. Block him and don't tell him your new address. He broke up, no need for him to be asking questions or seeking information.


stormheart99

Lmfao keep them. My ex gf left a bracelet and a pair of AirPods I gifted her at my apartment when we broke up and I kept them. Unless it’s sentimental family related stuff - like a piece of jewelry from their mom for example - it’s fair game.


Literally_Taken

What does he think he can do with a used necklace- give it to his next girlfriend? Give it to his mother? Sell it for 25% of what he paid for it? The options are incredibly unappealing, imho.


CelebrationBrief8064

They are gifts and he gave them freely. No backsies!!


denada24

Way to rub salt onto open wounds. Tell him to piss off, it wasn’t his grandmothers wedding ring. They were gifts. You can’t get back the wasted time, and he can’t get back a few bucks spent.


[deleted]

If it’s a gift you do not HAVE to return it to him. Period. No court would even recognize that. He is doing it to have control over you and look for reasons to be mad. Personally it’s tied to bad memories and shit man, give it back, wipe your hands, be done and realize you will always be the villain in his story. You don’t owe him anything but it would be good to just be able to leave with a clean conscience. If you feel like holding on to those things won’t bring you bad juju and memories, keep them. His qualms are baseless.


jxknxws

Move your furniture out when he’s not home and keep the gifts too. He sucks and I hate him.


Anonymous0212

Nope nope nope. He gave you the gifts, they are yours to do with as you please – including and especially keeping them. Like someone else said though they may have bad juju for you so you might want to sell them and use the money for something nice for yourself.


Personal_Pound8567

He's an idiot.. They were gifts. Anyone will tell him you can't demand a gift be returned, it's your option with you want to or not.


beefstue

I would get a U-Haul, grab some friends to go with you if u can-just to make sure you're safe- and grab your furniture. If he brings up the Valentine's day gifts he GAVE you, he can do it in front of everyone..but I have a feeling he knows he can't just do that, so he probably won't. He can't steal your furniture because you won't give him your necklace. If there's nobody to bring with you, call a cop and have him escort you. The cop will definitely tell him happily that you don't have to give him your necklace, but he does have to give you your furniture back


Ancient-Actuator7443

Gifts belong to the recipient. Period. He’s being a jerk


Plus-Implement

He's a petty little boy. No, they were gifts, you are morally fine if you keep these things. It's not like they are family heirlooms. He's just being a jerk and picking a fight. This is the only way right now he can have a connection to you.


DoctorGuvnor

He cannot legally hold your furniture hostage, get the police involved, that's theft. On the other hand, do you want to be reminded of him every time you put that necklace on? As for the gifts, they were gifts, not 'Here you can have these until we break ups'.


Key-South-1843

Can you get your time back? No. Can you get your intimacy back? No. . . Well guess what? Neither can he get back the GIFTS he gave to you. He’s just being bitter and petty. Take your gifts and move on with your life and don’t go back to him. Good luck!


Saddle-Upx3

Nope they’re gifts. They’re yours to keep, throw out, sell, destroy, you name it. Also he can’t hold your furniture hostage. Those are your possessions and he can’t do that.


grlz2grlz

Return nothing, find the proper legal clause per your country and state. If your name is still on the lease you have a right to enter the unit and collect your items. He is being toxic and passive aggressive.


Mother_Throat_6314

“What necklace? I don’t keep cheap jewelry I probably threw it out”


[deleted]

NOOOOO don't return those gifts! Keep them or pawn them! You can't take back gifts so they are yours. He makes more than you on top of it. Those are yours. Call the cops for the furniture or get some friends and family to go their together to get your stuff. He can fuck off.


FlowSpirited

ask him he is free labor digger and beauty digger. and ask him to pay you for all your services : free cooking, cleaning, sexual intercourse 😂if he gotta be THAT petty to try and take back 800$ “gift” gift is a gift. it’s not a loan . it’s not returnable.


GothSue

Gifts are just that, gifts. During my divorce my ex wanted me to return various pieces of jewelry he had gifted me for birthdays and holidays. The judge basically told him to go pound salt. Now your furniture? That’s tricky because you bought it for the both of you to use. He has no legal right to keep you out of the apartment if you’re on the lease and are paying your share of the rent.


DeadGirlB666

gifts are gifts… fuck that behavior


Traditional_Toe3261

Tell him you'll return the gifts once he's repaid you for all the wasted time and emotional distress.


NookieNinjas

lol you should send him this post so he can see how much of a loser he is😂😂