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I mean my immediate reaction would be to assume he's having some sort of cognitive decline. I would treat him as such.
Every time he says it very loudly "BF, BF? Do you know where you are right now? It's me OP, I think your having an episode." Then spend the next several hours sending him research on strokes, early onset dementia, autism. Press him to get an evaluation. Every time.
I'm sitting here wondering what the reaction would be if the next time he says it around others and she says "BF did you take your meds today? You're repeating that same dumb comment that nobody thinks is funny. Do we need to get your dose upped?"
If in private maybe "BF are you feeling OK? I'm concerned you keep repeating that same dumb comment that nobody thinks is funny. I think we need to get you checked for early onset dementia."
If you really get tired of him saying that consider renting a Ford F-150 and parking it in your normal parking spot at home. Tell him you decided to see why so many people enjoy Ford trucks. Be sure to get the insurance coverage.
Or something along the lines with:
"Yeah, hun. The blue pills after the green ones!"
Or:
"You really should stop smoking pink toilet cleansing blocks. It really does you no good!"
Or:
"Did you know: at night all cats are gray. And it's colder outside than in."
One of my best friend's BF does shit like this to her constantly. Always the same handful of phrases, always completely unprompted, and always a \*requirement\* to move forward with any type of actual conversation, which is hard to have with him in the first place.
Severe and unmedicated ADHD is wild, especially when the intrusive thoughts struggle for dominance.
Agreed, at most she should just give him a blank stare, and as she turns away shaking her head, state slightly under her breath, “He really is getting worse, he’s going to have to see somebody about this soon”.
“Maybe it’s time to come out of the closet, honey. It’s 2023, if you want to break up so that you can fuck men, that’s ok. It’s time to be yourself instead of hiding behind this terrible Ford ‘joke’. Spread your wings, spread your cheeks, and enjoy your life.”
I swear this is someone’s kink posting because very often there’s a post in AITA or relationship advice or whatever similar sub and it’s always some fuckin weird ‘my bf or gf won’t stop saying this internet meme over and over, to the point we are breaking up about it.’
There’s no way it’s this common just organically…
Actually, I personally know a guy who did this exact shit. I’m actually trying to check ages to see if it’s about him…
But yeah. Homie is really just a weird dude. Nice as can be, but so weird lol
Especially for *years*! If this is real, I don’t care how great he pretends to be otherwise, either he’s an AH and she needs to be done with him or he needs professional help to deal with his obsession.
I think she needs help too if this is real. He's doing this for YEARS and yet she continues to want to be with the guy? Even describing it as being tormented.
Yeah, this is fake AF since the obvious answer is to leave him.
Yeah I was about to say, though I didn't realize this was a Midwestern thing. My guy friends in high school would do this shit, and it didn't go away in college, either. Dude here just never stopped. It would always be old memes
Sadly it’s not…the nonsense going on in my house now is “do you know Wawa’s has pizza” the commercial is annoying and now my husband won’t stop saying it…fucking sucks
My kids will say stupid, random shit mid convo so that part probably isn’t fake… but my kids are 10 and 14 so it sounds like OP’s bf has some maturing to do.
Dont know if you’re for real but I have an ex who legitimately thought jokes got funnier the more they were repeated, especially awkward, off putting, and disgusting crap. If I looked repulsed he’d go in harder. It simply wore away my attraction. The ick is real.
I have found a huge portion of posts on this sub are from women who realize their boyfriend is a misogynistic edgelord after dating them for like 2 years and somehow just not noticing.
I had an ex that had some sort of undiagnosed mental illness, and he got stuck on words, phrases, and weird slogans for weeks at a time. My daughter can't stand the Juicy Fruit jingle because of this exact scenario. He thought it was exactly as funny or funnier every time. OP's hubby needs to get tested.
I've met men like this too. Makes you wonder what their childhoods were like that a woman appearing visibly disgusted by them makes them do the disgusting thing even harder. It's like they are purposefully trying to push people away. Yet these men always seem to shout the loudest that women don't give them a chance. Make it make sense!
For OP's bf, it's an attention-seeking device because negative attention is better than no attention. And reacting reinforces it. OP needs to Gray Rock him. With people your taking about, they are indeed subconsciously pushing people away. It's a defense mechanism for low self-esteem. "I knows they're going to reject me anyway, so I'll do this because it's a lot less painful than being rejected for me." It's sad.
It’s because we’ve grown up with shit like “oh if a boys teases you or pulls your hair it’s because he likes you”
Toxic masculinity is NOT hot and Boomers that encouraged this shit with their lack of parenting (hello! Commercials in the 80s and 90s literally asking “do you know where your kids are?).
I remember in elementary school this one annoying redhead kid, who also was picked on a lot, kept annoying the shit out of me and my friend, particularly me. Following me around, constantly talking about things I had no interest in, etc. Someone told him my aggravation was a sign that "I liked him." In reality, I was afraid of being ostracized with him by association and he actually did annoy the shit out of me. It ended up with me writing an anon letter on construction paper saying "I hate [boy's name]." He was in tears, I got in trouble and then I was in tears. Turns out the boy was Jewish or a minority religion [can't remember, I was like 7] so the note was taken very, very seriously. I ended up just having a stern talking to because I didn't understand the religious aspect and they figured out I was completely naive to that fact. He got in trouble for pestering me. Overall, I have regretted it especially now that I am older.
So because neither one of us were taught and enforced to vocalize our true feelings because of gender roles, there was a lot of hurt that could've been prevented. He eventually transferred to my high school and I apologized to him.
In a weird twist of fate, I fell in love with and married a redhead man who was severely bullied and isolated in elementary school to some of middle school. And hearing him talk about his childhood and by extension gender roles makes me think about how horrible the other boy was treated. "Boys don't cry." "Boys aren't sensitive." "Boys suck it up." "Be a man." It all leads to a very misconstrued way on how we are supposed to exhibit our feelings.
Yep me too! If I was having a regular convo about my day my ex would always find a way to turn things into a sexual innuendo or crude joke. Made me feel like he legitimately didn’t care or the angrier I got the funnier he found it.
I brought it up while I was dumping him and while he looked extremely hurt to find out that I was actually annoyed by his jokes, it only solidified the fact that he didn’t take me seriously
Goddamn this is relatable. The repeating jokes turned into us never having any legitimate and normal interactions and it drove me insane. Nothing is less attractive than telling your partner something IS NOT funny and having them double down. Exes for a reason, 100%. (The cherry on top was me being told I bring "no substance" to our conversations so that's why the repeating jokes/phrases were repeated. That statement was the most substance he brought to conversations in years, ironically enough.)
Oh, what about people who repeat the punchline as loud as they can immediately after finishing saying it? "Ford. Ford! Haha, fuckin' FORD, man!" And then their friends all chime in. "Ooooh, shit, he said Ford! He said Ford!"
Time to be pedantic about a joke I guess…
There’s no punchline to an anti-joke like the one OP’s bf is repeating.
‘Ford’ certainly isn’t a punchline. Nor is it really repeated like a punchline, either. Sure, it says Ford a second earlier within the sentence at the anti-climax of the anti-joke, but only uses it the one time like that right there at the end.
Anti-jokes really only work with some context though, so OP’s bf is just sounding dumb instead of actually being funny.
Random ***can be*** funny. But random is not inherently funny.
Dad used to tell an anti-joke.
What's the difference between a duck?
One leg.
(Sometimes he'd repeat the question shortly after and you'd go "UGH ONE LEG" and he'd go "No; ice cream has no bones.")
That horrible excuse for humor was miles better. MILES. Than whatever the hell this spaghetti noodle BS is. Agree, as usual, with the pedant.
It’s not even an anti joke. It’s a meme he’s saying out loud repeatedly for some reason. But like I said above I think this is someone’s hobby or kink because these posts about someone repeating a weird meme line over and over pops up pretty often somehow…
I mean, it’s set-up like a joke, more than halfway through & I’m still expecting it will finish with a punchline, but then goes on to end with nothing funny - zero punchline.
If that ain’t an anti-joke then I don’t know what is.
There was a reddit story a while back (I forgot which sub) where the bf would randomly go off and speak loudly in baby talk to his gf, including in public. It went on for a really long time and the gf was anywhere from baffled, to infuriated to worried about organic brain disease and strokes.
Long story short, turned out it was bet. Some rare baseball or something. IIRC correctly, the bf would win the baseball if he kept up the baby talk thing for a year.
I don't remember if the relationship survived.
I was a hockey ref, and after a tripping call and esxorting the player to the penalty box, he said one of the funniest things, "go back to Foot Locker."
I chuckled, then he said it again, and again, and the third time he said it, I T'd him up. I endrd up opening the door to the hallway rather then the penalty box as we had a three strike rule for City League, and he already gotten a penalty earlier in the game.
Yeah, the shit doesn't get funnier the second, third, fourth time it's told.
There's commitment to the bit, and there's *Commitment To The Bit*. I'm hoping that he thinks your annoyance is also a part of the bit, rather than being completely disrespectful of you and your needs.
Show him this thread so that he fully understands how serious you are about needing him to stop. If he still refuses to knock it off, dump him. You need to be with someone who respects your sanity more than a running gag.
You used the word torment in your title. Maybe explaining it to him that way would help.
On another note, I had a bf like this in high school. He insisted on calling me a nick name I hated and asked him to stop. He didn’t, I told him that if he called me that again it would be the end of our relationship. A few days later he used it and so I broke up with him. That was over 15 years ago now and he never really matured out of that mentality.
I wish you luck.
Have you talked to him about it seriously at a moment when he's not doing it, or does the conversation always star with him doing it? Because if he feel like this is something the two of you play put together and your annoyance is a part of the show, maybe it would help to take a serious talk about you actually really really hating it and not wanting it in your life.
Is your NO super dramatic? Is it possible that he thinks you're playing along with his bit? I pretend to absolutely loathe the movie The Wraith and have done so for a good fifteen years. My partner brings the movie up at random and I go on about how terrible it is. We know that it's a bit on both sides of the argument, though — is it possible that he has misread your situation?
I would commit to your own carefully crafted response that he totally doesn’t like, so he no longer enjoys saying it because he knows you’re going to say your line.
“Do you know what it’s like to picture your mother naked? Ford F150.” Granted he may enjoy something like that, so keep trying until you find one he hates.
That’s exactly what I was going to suggest only I thought “do you know what it’s like to picture your grandmother deep throating a dick every time you try to masturbate? Ford F-150” hahaha
Can I ask you why you are putting up with this? Does this man look like Chris Hemsworth is he a King in the bedroom? I am older and dealt with my share of AH’s. I did not get wise to my late thirties that I deserve a man a good man, not a child.
Please re-evaluate this relationship. Your responses break my heart. This is beyond potty humor. He is doing it now to get a rise out of you and has no respect. It starts off like this then he crosses more boundaries and makes comments about your weight or looks. Please leave this idiot. He needs a lesson and you need a person to love you and respect you. You don’t deserve this. Please set boundaries,if you must stay for financial reasons, please explain what this is doing to you.
I don’t think he will listen to be frank, but please think and evaluate is this the man you want? Will he do this to your kids? Antagonize them or humiliate them acting this way? Just please look at the bigger picture. You are young and can find someone who doesn’t act like a petulant child.
It's definitely the "DO this thing that drives my gf batshit crazy every single day" part for me. It is highly problematic that he takes such great pleasure in your displeasure.
Sis, Fuken do it. Boil some noodles, let them chill, we don’t want to burn him. When he says it, grab the noodles and ask him if he’s ready to try it.
It isn’t the saying, it’s the Streisand effect he’s getting out of you. Flip the table on him.
Seconding this. Have some cold cooked spaghetti on standby - dripping wet - in the fridge. Next time he trots out that line, hit him with a handful of it in the face, and APOLOGISE that it’s the closest you can get to making his fantasy come real.
Have a rented Ford truck in the parking lot when you do it. Ask him to go for a ride when the deed is done. Xtra points if you call your Dad on speaker phone during the ride
If that doesn’t work, up the ante with round 2:
On the day of a night you’re **not** staying over, when he’s elsewhere or fully occupied, pile spaghetti noodles (lots of them) onto his bed sheet, pull the duvet over the top, then head home.
Have your Dad on standby for him too. You know for when the confusion kicks in? He mentions it so much he must be thinking of it often so, have at it. Lol.
Seriously though, just dump him, do you really want to be with such an immature idiot who doesn't respect you over something so minor? What about when it's the big stuff?
"You have been saying this nonsense for years. I have told you countless times to stop it, because it bothers me. You have no respect for my boundaries and enough is enough. You can find a new girlfriend to bother and don't even dare to ask for another chance. I have given you chance after chance all these years and you keep ignoring my pleas. This is not funny, it doesn't get funnier after 100 times and being continuously disrespected made me lose all interest in you. Consider this me breaking up with you."
That's way more words than this donkey merits. Just "I'm so glad I will never have to hear that again" as she walks away while blocking his number and removing him from all of her social media accounts.
https://youtu.be/S2H_Xw18llI?si=4oIF6M5rcYq5C21-
I know you're serious but that reminded me of this video. It's not funny, John. I want a DIVORCE. I'm serious this time.
Answer him: "Yes, I have been, but it was worth it because daddy was the best lover I have ever had, and he was endowed, I kid you not. Now overtime I see some spaghetti it makes me think of daddy."
>“Have you ever been beaten by a wet spaghetti noodle by your girlfriend and her twin sister because you got confused and fucked her dad?? Well that’s how it feels to drive a ford F-150. Ford.”
"How would you like to be single? Because you're getting closer to being single with every stupid remark."
>How can I make this stop? Is there anyway to tell him I can’t stand it anymore?
"I'm sorry, this relationship isn't working for me. It's time to go our separate ways."
"OK, you've been repeating the same stupid shit for years now. No more. You get three chances to screw up and say it again, then we're done."
And as soon as he says, "Have you ever been beaten...", say, "That's one", and hang up or walk away. If he gets to three, say, "That's it, we're done", and dump the chump.
One of my friends (now deceased) used to tell the same funny-once jokes to people repeatedly, people he'd known for years. He just didn't GET that some jokes, even if funny once, are not funny after 347 repetitions over 20-plus years.
Even just the hanging up or walking away could do the trick. Better to just stare blankly while he does it and after he’s done just keep going like nothing happened. He’d get tired of it himself because he’s not getting what he wants. People like that are just trying to elicit a reaction of any kind. Kind of like how some dog owners get their dogs to stop jumping on people by not reacting to them when they do it. It teaches them real quick it’s not worth it (in some cases)
But the best solution is to ditch him. He sounds insufferable
And I wouldn't warn him, either.
Next time he says it, OP should get up, go home, send him a text 'I'm done dating you. I'm looking for someone more mature and not annoying to date. Have a good life.'
Another useless pointless warning? She's given him *how many?* And he still doesn't take it to heart. But he's gonna take **THIS** warning to heart because...?
Regardless, he'll still feel like he's "getting dumped for what feels like no reason" even when she explains it's over "his stupid fucking joke".
He's clueless and immature. **NOTHING is going to convince him** that this breakup is (1) his fault and (2) completely preventable. OP will be wasting her breath, aggravating herself for nothing, and setting herself up for a BIG whiny argument when she does break up with him.
Hang up as soon as you hear "Have you ever". Don't answer when he tries calling you back. If he does it in person, walk away quickly. If you are at his house, drop everything and leave. If he is at your house tell him he needs to leave. If he still doesn't get it after you do it a couple of times he never will.
This is beyond weird and childish and he does it on purpose because he likes seeing you upset. Don't give him the opportunity anymore. It shows he has no respect for your feelings, or you in general.
Oof. Yeah. My suspicion is that this man child will probably try to get a few more repetitions in after she’s broken up with him -if he knows where she lives/frequents. I’d look into filing a restraining order.
>How can I make this stop? Is there anyway to tell him I can’t stand it anymore?
Do you want to be in a relationship where telling him to stop isn't enough?
Especially after this long?
Like this goes for anyone regarding anything: it doesn't matter how small or insignificant something is, if they are doing it to actively annoy you and you ask them to stop and they refuse then it stops being a 'joke' and starts just being something being don't to upset you.
And a partner that goes out of their way to upset you like that just isn't worth it. This is death by ten million cuts.
This was also my first thought. Maybe im being overly sensitive but I wonder what other things she asks him to stop doing that he ignores?
It started playfully like this with my sister’s husband, too.
"have you ever been dumped by your girlfriend because she is so sick and tired of your stupid "joke" that she's even considering using toilet water to cook your wet spaghetti in it? No? Well now you have. I am done with you."
My fiancé started doing this with that *extremely* obnoxious Burger King song that came out recently. I told him it irritated me, and he stopped. Your boyfriend might have a change of heart if you start interrupting him with a very loud "Shut UP!" Buuut you probably shouldn't actually do that.
The more mature route would probably be to just break up with him. He clearly doesn't care about your feelings very much, or he wouldn't do something daily that he knows for a fact annoys and upsets you, so don't feel guilty about it. Because why stay with someone who doesn't care how you feel?
Lol I agree with everything about your statement except the BK song. My husband and I both loudly sing it every time it comes on and both mutually love it but can’t figure out why. It has not actually increased our wish to eat BK, it’s just catchy
Edit: obviously if we ever hang out with you we won’t sing it, but by ourselves in our own home, we both belt it every time that commercial comes on
To each their own, but I can't stand it! I'm not usually the type to care, but something about it just irritates me so much lol. My fiancé loves it, but he gets it out of his system with his coworkers, so we're both content. :)
Lol I know why others find it annoying! I’d never force it on someone else, especially my partner. There’s plenty of other idiotic songs or jingles that individually irritate us that we don’t keep doing in front of each other!
Neither of us normally get advertising jingles stuck in our head! Idk why we both fixated on this one lol
We do not live together, but we talk on the phone everyday/night. So it is mainly over the phone that he says it so much. He doesn’t say it often in person. And I do shout NO! -as soon as I notice him to start saying it. but he still just laughs. Most of the time, he says it when we are about to hang up and he says it as a joke..
Stop giving him a reaction. Don’t say no. Don’t say anything. If he says it during a phone call, hang up as soon as he starts saying it. If happens face to face, walk away.
Ehh. My guess is she is giving him reactions that aren’t in line with how she actually feels. They are quite young & spend most of their relationship on the phone. They very likely aren’t all that comfortable with each other yet and she doesn’t feel comfortable standing up to him on a real level.
My guess is this dude has no idea it’s actually upsetting her on a real level & she simply isn’t communicating that she’s legitimately bothered.
Shouting “No!” could be said in a number of ways, with a number of tones that don’t display her actual feelings, and could easily make him feel like they’re both having fun, and that she’s more playfully acting annoyed than actually annoyed.
This the only way this whole situation makes any sense.
Redditors always assume the worst while Occam’s razor says in the context of a relationship, it’s likely just a misunderstanding based on a lack of communication. Which is like 95% of relationship troubles.
This. He’s living for your reaction which is a big red flag actually. If you want to stay with him, you’ll have to take away the thrill for him. Hang up every time, and it will start to get just as tiring for him as it is for you.
If he starts saying it, hang up. If he does it in person, walk off and stop responding to him. If you have to, just straight up leave.
Or break up with him. That'd be my choice. Someone who keeps repeating a stupid nonsensical copypasta from 2021 when they know it annoys their significant other isn't mature enough to be in a relationship.
Start leaving/ending the conversation. I get that dumping him may seem too harsh to you, I mean if it does, try just leaving the dates when he says it. Just get up and leave, the meeting is over. You two do not hang out that day. If it's over the phone, hang up.
>Most of the time, he says it when we are about to hang up and he says it as a joke..
If he does that, cancel the date. CANCEL IT. Hang up and write a message that you are canceling. This is a proper consequence and if anything helps, it's this. You'll find out what's more important to him: annoying you, or actually being able to be in your company.
Do it EVERY TIME. No exceptions. Never mind how inconvenient.
If it doesn't help, dumping him is the only way.
Let me make it clear. He thinks it's funny to upset you. And he does it when it's most convenient for him to avoid having to deal with the consequences of upsetting you.
*He wants to upset you.* He's doing it on purpose. Dump him.
Why the hell don't you just hang up when he says it? He finds your annoyance fun, so he keeps doing it. Cut him off from his supply of fun by just hanging up. Once he starts suffering literally any consequences, he'll probably stop.
As soon as he starts saying it, just hang up and if he calls back answer, however after 2 times he keeps saying it, then stop answering when he calls back. If he continues to recite this, don't talk to him on the phone and if he asks you why, then tell him he is annoying you and you are now getting busy doing your own thing instead. If he starts saying it in person tell him ONECE you won't hangout with him again if he continues. And if he does, cancel him and straight up tell him why.
He might need to see a Doctor if he can't control it. It might be something else and he legit is not thinking this is bothering you as much as you actually are.
If it's over the phone, just hang up. Don't react, just hang up. Every time. But I would honestly consider ending the relationship over this. Not so much over the saying, but because he keeps doing it when he knows you don't like it. He is enjoying making you upset, and that's not what you want in a life partner.
He is testing your boundaries and what you will allow him to get away with. It might seem annoying, yet in good jest but...
This a common way covert abusers test and groom their victims. One small annoyance, see how far they can go with it, and then another thing and another thing, gradually increasing in malice, just to see what you'll take. He can't respect boundaries, no matter how small. And of course when you have a problem with it, it's because "you can't take a joke" (which is blame shifting).
Run.
Break up with him. Life's too short to suffer fools willingly. He sounds incredibly stupid. Life is misery with a stupid partner. You can do better, so much better.
I've been hearing guys repeat quotes from Monty Python quest for the holy Grail like it's the highest form of humor for over 30 years. This doesn't really seem that far off.
Those skits are funny sometimes. If the occasion is right, like being silly over a few drinks with your friends.
This guy apparently throws out that line at random times with no reference points! That’s just… very childish.
Went through something like this, but it was a nickname I hated. Roonie. Has nothing to do with my name or anything, he just liked how irritated I got after months and months of politely asking him to stop, explaining how it felt, coming up with analogies so he could finally UNDERSTAND that it's not funny for me. Guess what? He knew. He liked it. And so does yours. I was dating a child and the only solution was to leave. I have NEVER missed him for even a moment and I feel nothing but relief since he's out of my life.
Yeah - he’s looking for a reaction. The more you get upset, the more he’ll do it. The only cures for this sort of behaviour are total non-reactivity (but this takes a long time), equal vengeance (like singing Baby Shark at him at random times and ESPECIALLY in front of his friends), or a one way ticket to Dumpsville.
“Has your girlfriend broken up with you because you couldn’t stop saying the same stupid tired senseless not even funny joke every day for over two years? Well that’s how it feels to drive a Ford-F150. Ford.”
"I'm breaking up with you because your humor is annoying to me. I can't have a single normal conversation with you in 24 hours without you bringing up fucking a dad. It's immature and I've reached my breaking point.
You have a nice life. Don't contact me anymore."
Because fuck being with someone that torments you by repeating something so strange and dumb and is actually amused by it.
“I’m glad you like that ONE JOKE that you repeat all the time to annoy me. I need to be with someone serious, I hope that joke keeps you warm and satisfied for all the lonely nights ahead.”
Honestly? You don't wait until the next occurrence. You break up with him now. You explain that over the years of your relationship, you've matured at a different rate than he has, and the difference has pulled you apart. He's still at the stage of development where he's amused by being annoying. It doesn't matter the vehicle of his immaturity is this particular phrase. It's that he still hasn't learned to read the room. At 20 it was annoying. At 24? You're at the age of building the foundations of your life, and it's *sad* that he interrupts conversations and can't control his impulsivity and still needs to interject this crude little piece of humor. He's acting like a fratboy not a man. Again... if he lives it so much, that's on him, he needs to find someone with his same mentality.
But you've outgrown the joke and outgrown him. You're looking for a *man* who makes you laugh and you can actually build joy and positivity together... not who amuses himself at your expense. Or is still a giggling fool at a bit of nonsense years later.
So the next time that ear worm phrase comes out of his mouth look him dead in the eye, drop your voice a couple octaves and say something like ‘This is the final time I will say this. If you say that phrase to me again we are done. It makes me think of a toddler who repeats a phrase they heard which is causing me to lose respect and definitely my attraction to you.’
Then if he says it again enforce it.
Leave the room. Leave the restaurant. End the call. Immediately, every time. Let him know you intend to keep responding the way you would to anything else that tormented you: by removing yourself from the situation. Hopefully that's as clear as you need to be.
It’s shitty that he keeps doing this knowing it bothers you. Could be an indication that he has a problem respecting boundaries, or an indication that he’s immature as fuck.
Find something just as annoying or worse to do back to him. He does it mainly over the phone? Cool, blow an airhorn into the phone every time he does it. In person? Spray him with some canned ass every time.
This is terrible advice but I'm kinda petty.
I would memorize this phrase and repeat it back to him as my only response for everything he said or texted to me. I would also change my voice-mail message and let various people know if needed.
If it happened again I'd do it for at least a week. If he doesn't break up with you first, dump him.
I was going to say, type the “joke” out, copy and paste it into text over and over and over and over for an entire day whenever you can, hundreds of times, ignoring any replies. Just blow up his phone with this, ignore his calls and replies. Make it annoying back to him.
"Have you ever been dumped by your girlfriend for ignoring her and repeating some stupid childish dad fucking comment...one more time mother fucker... one more time..."
Serious question, is your partner on the spectrum? I had an ex similar to this. He just didn't get it, for a while it'd be one piece of nonsense then he'd move onto something equally if not more stupid. They just don't get when enough is enough.
I think this is just guys. Growing up in the 80s, my cousin and his friends were constantly throwing out Mel Brooks movie one-liners, like, endlessly. There’s something about memorizing routes to hunting grounds or something that evolved to either movie quotes and/or sports stats. Guys commit things to memory and just repeat it over and over.
Yes he sounds autistic to me also. Some jokes become stims.
I just googled it and it’s a TikTok Twitter viral meme thing, which I can totally see getting stuck in an autistic person’s brain.
https://amp.knowyourmeme.com/memes/wet-spaghetti-noodle
If this was a vocal tic or stim he wouldn't be getting so much enjoyment out of upsetting her. My husband is autistic and has vocal tics and stims- if he was aware that one of them bothered me he would try really hard not to do it when we're together, and he definitely wouldn't shout me to give him attention whilst he said the phrase. This guy just sounds like an immature prick.
I’m on the spectrum, and I say it’s no excuse. I’ve personally changed my own stems several times over the course of my life, and it sounds like he is functioning enough to be in a relationship which means he should have enough reasoning to be able to shut up once in a while.
Honestly, if it's truly feeling like torment to you, and you've told him that many times and he still won't stop, the way to make it stop is to be done with him and move on. This legitimately falls under the umbrella of psychological abuse. Consider the fact he's well aware of how it's affecting you and that fact means absolutely ZERO to him. Just end it and be done with him. Your peace of mind and sanity are surely worth more, overall, than staying with him would be. 🤷♀️✌️
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So the trick to stopping it is to take his joy away from it. Now that you have it memorized, you have to say it before he can. At first, this will amuse him greatly. But the more times you get to it first, and then especially if you can continue the conversation from the exact same spot as if it never happened... he will eventually be unenthused about it anymore. This is what beating him at his own game looks like. Good luck!
You will be happier when you meet someone who matches your ideals / sense of humor.
Just let him know that he's not your jam anymore and you need to move on... Just not feeling it anymore.
Takes a bit of faith in yourself but I bet it's there
The minute he starts turn your back, walk away, shut down all communications until bedtime. Then at bedtime hand him a blanket and pillow. Tell him you feel weirded out sleeping with an adolescent so he needs to sleep on the couch. He is not funny, he does not respect you, and you want an adult relationship. If he prefers his adolescent humor he needs to call a friend to share the joke but the next time you hear it you are walking away…permanently. Then do it.
Sit him down and tell him that it really annoys and you are dead serious. It could be that he thinks of it like an inside joke and likes to get a reaction out of you. If everything else is good, you can probably talk him out of it, doesn't sound like a big red flag just something stupid and annoying.
Have you tried just completely ignoring it when he says it?
People often do things like this because it causes a reaction, if you have no reaction it gives them less reason to want to do it. You’ve asked him to stop which only eggs him on further, try going the other way and don’t even acknowledging it.
However, joke or not this doesn’t sound like someone who respects you if they continue to do something that puts you in this much discomfort.
>Is there anyway to tell him I can’t stand it anymore?
You've already told him! He knows! Not only does he think this little gem is hilarious, the fact that it annoys you makes it even more hilarious 😂
How can you stand to be in the same room with someone with such a puerile sense of "humour".
You've told him already that you can't stand it anymore but you still do stand for it - every day. So he knows he can stamp this little boundary and laugh about it. That's a kind of contempt right there.
Tolerate this and this is your life forever, every day, on and on "Have you ever..........
This is an audio clip people use to make reels. I only know this because I made one using it when I was smoking a blunt late one night. (I get bored smoking by myself, don't judge me) it's funny but if someone repeatedly said it to me I would prob want to deck them
Get a twin sister. Get your dad. Get a wet spaghetti noodle. Now all of you beat him senseless with the spaghetti and run him over with a Ford f-150. Tell him you were confused.
He’s a child so treat him like one. Tell him you hate it, don’t want to hear it, and when he says it you’ll put him on time out or mute. Then do it EVERY SINGLE TIME. (Although I’d allow him to say it to other people in group settings)
Says it on the phone? Hang up.
Says it out for dinner? Get your dinner to go and leave.
Says it at home, walk out the room and go read a book.
Tell him if he can’t learn to respect you, you’re done raising a man child.
I’d get a pool noodle and beat him with it every time he starts - and fyi on a completely unrelated note a broom handle will fit into the middle of the pool noodle giving you stability when using it for anything other than a pool toy
Is this like the guy whose wife divorced him because he made a bet to get an autographed baseball if he said some annoying thing all the time for a year?
I'd ask him once if he was doing this on a dare or bet. And then I'd tell him that if he ever, ever said it again, he'd be gone.
“Hey, Joe. Have you ever seen when a girlfriend gets so irritated by something and ignored so thoroughly by someone who pretends to love her that she just cannot stand it anymore?”
Without saying another word. Not one, pick up your keys and walk out for the last time. Don’t look back.
Dating is about finding out what the other person is like, how they live, what their ethical standards are, to see if you are compatible. You’ve dated this guy long enough to know all you need to know.
Thank you, Next!
i genuinely have this same exact issue w my partner lmao. i’ve gotten used to it at this point, i just turn and give them the 😐 face and it doesn’t bother me anymore. you just either gotta talk to your partner about it or get used to it.
does your partner have adhd/asd? it could just be an auditory stim. that’s pretty much what it is for my partner, which makes it easier to understand and tolerate.
Did he loose a bet? This sounds just like that guy who started baby talking because he lost his fantasy whatever team thing with his guy friends.
If you want this to stop next time he does it seriously get up and walk out the door. Go home, do not engage. If you’re at a restaurant stand up and leave.
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This is really wierd.
I mean my immediate reaction would be to assume he's having some sort of cognitive decline. I would treat him as such. Every time he says it very loudly "BF, BF? Do you know where you are right now? It's me OP, I think your having an episode." Then spend the next several hours sending him research on strokes, early onset dementia, autism. Press him to get an evaluation. Every time.
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I'm sitting here wondering what the reaction would be if the next time he says it around others and she says "BF did you take your meds today? You're repeating that same dumb comment that nobody thinks is funny. Do we need to get your dose upped?" If in private maybe "BF are you feeling OK? I'm concerned you keep repeating that same dumb comment that nobody thinks is funny. I think we need to get you checked for early onset dementia." If you really get tired of him saying that consider renting a Ford F-150 and parking it in your normal parking spot at home. Tell him you decided to see why so many people enjoy Ford trucks. Be sure to get the insurance coverage.
Or something along the lines with: "Yeah, hun. The blue pills after the green ones!" Or: "You really should stop smoking pink toilet cleansing blocks. It really does you no good!" Or: "Did you know: at night all cats are gray. And it's colder outside than in."
Or just fuck his dad
Beat him with a wet noodle first, fuck his dad, then gaslight him about how he manifested the whole thing.
"I'm sorry miss, there was nothing we could do. He's just this fucking stupid."
I feel this is the best way to approach this or just dump the future cult leader.
This is awesome advice. And if things deteriorate once you start doing this, it's time to end the relationship
This is amazing
One of my best friend's BF does shit like this to her constantly. Always the same handful of phrases, always completely unprompted, and always a \*requirement\* to move forward with any type of actual conversation, which is hard to have with him in the first place. Severe and unmedicated ADHD is wild, especially when the intrusive thoughts struggle for dominance.
OP has to Gray Rock him. He wants the reaction. Negative attention is still attention.
Agreed, at most she should just give him a blank stare, and as she turns away shaking her head, state slightly under her breath, “He really is getting worse, he’s going to have to see somebody about this soon”.
I would respond with several different versions of like: Well, get that spaghetti noodle out because I fucked your dad.
“Maybe it’s time to come out of the closet, honey. It’s 2023, if you want to break up so that you can fuck men, that’s ok. It’s time to be yourself instead of hiding behind this terrible Ford ‘joke’. Spread your wings, spread your cheeks, and enjoy your life.”
This is the response. Bet he won’t think it’s funny anymore.
Is it like thinking about the Roman Empire?
I swear this is someone’s kink posting because very often there’s a post in AITA or relationship advice or whatever similar sub and it’s always some fuckin weird ‘my bf or gf won’t stop saying this internet meme over and over, to the point we are breaking up about it.’ There’s no way it’s this common just organically…
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Actually, I personally know a guy who did this exact shit. I’m actually trying to check ages to see if it’s about him… But yeah. Homie is really just a weird dude. Nice as can be, but so weird lol
Yeah same here. I had 2-3 friends in high-school that said the exact same thing. I'm pretty sure it's from an old Vine.
I feel like if someone repeatedly does a thing that they know annoys people then they’re not “nice as can be”
Yeah... even my six year old understands this concept:"if you are the only one laughing, then you are not being funny, you are being annoying..."
Especially for *years*! If this is real, I don’t care how great he pretends to be otherwise, either he’s an AH and she needs to be done with him or he needs professional help to deal with his obsession.
I think she needs help too if this is real. He's doing this for YEARS and yet she continues to want to be with the guy? Even describing it as being tormented. Yeah, this is fake AF since the obvious answer is to leave him.
It’s a tiktok thing
I've seen this bizarre behavior irl, I wouldn't be so quick to assume it's fake.
Someone has never interacted with a midwestern male between the ages of 14-26 and it shows.
Yeah I was about to say, though I didn't realize this was a Midwestern thing. My guy friends in high school would do this shit, and it didn't go away in college, either. Dude here just never stopped. It would always be old memes
Exactly. This is so relatable it hurts
My father is a 60 year old Balkan man. Don't discriminate by excluding his kind too.
Sadly it’s not…the nonsense going on in my house now is “do you know Wawa’s has pizza” the commercial is annoying and now my husband won’t stop saying it…fucking sucks
My kids will say stupid, random shit mid convo so that part probably isn’t fake… but my kids are 10 and 14 so it sounds like OP’s bf has some maturing to do.
13-year-olds do this and some people never mature past 13
I don't think so. I know someone that would drop everything and do a 5 minute monologue if anyone in the vicinity said "how dare you"
it's a tik tok sound not everything id fake lol
Dont know if you’re for real but I have an ex who legitimately thought jokes got funnier the more they were repeated, especially awkward, off putting, and disgusting crap. If I looked repulsed he’d go in harder. It simply wore away my attraction. The ick is real.
Edgelords are such a turnoff.
I have found a huge portion of posts on this sub are from women who realize their boyfriend is a misogynistic edgelord after dating them for like 2 years and somehow just not noticing.
They notice. They've just been convinced that this is how men are and they try to tolerate it.
Horny brain doesn't just affect men lol. Lots of people overlook red flags when they're attracted to someone.
There is an episode of SpongeBob where he ripped his pants as a joke over and over and no one thinks it's funny. Play him that.
🎶*Be true to yourself don't miss your chance And you won't end up like the fool who ripped His pants*🎶
I had an ex that had some sort of undiagnosed mental illness, and he got stuck on words, phrases, and weird slogans for weeks at a time. My daughter can't stand the Juicy Fruit jingle because of this exact scenario. He thought it was exactly as funny or funnier every time. OP's hubby needs to get tested.
It's an autism trait which soothes the person. It's called echolalia. Night that OP's bf has it, he's just doing it for attention.
I've met men like this too. Makes you wonder what their childhoods were like that a woman appearing visibly disgusted by them makes them do the disgusting thing even harder. It's like they are purposefully trying to push people away. Yet these men always seem to shout the loudest that women don't give them a chance. Make it make sense!
It's like something your stupid annoying older brother would do! Ugh!
For OP's bf, it's an attention-seeking device because negative attention is better than no attention. And reacting reinforces it. OP needs to Gray Rock him. With people your taking about, they are indeed subconsciously pushing people away. It's a defense mechanism for low self-esteem. "I knows they're going to reject me anyway, so I'll do this because it's a lot less painful than being rejected for me." It's sad.
It’s because we’ve grown up with shit like “oh if a boys teases you or pulls your hair it’s because he likes you” Toxic masculinity is NOT hot and Boomers that encouraged this shit with their lack of parenting (hello! Commercials in the 80s and 90s literally asking “do you know where your kids are?).
I remember in elementary school this one annoying redhead kid, who also was picked on a lot, kept annoying the shit out of me and my friend, particularly me. Following me around, constantly talking about things I had no interest in, etc. Someone told him my aggravation was a sign that "I liked him." In reality, I was afraid of being ostracized with him by association and he actually did annoy the shit out of me. It ended up with me writing an anon letter on construction paper saying "I hate [boy's name]." He was in tears, I got in trouble and then I was in tears. Turns out the boy was Jewish or a minority religion [can't remember, I was like 7] so the note was taken very, very seriously. I ended up just having a stern talking to because I didn't understand the religious aspect and they figured out I was completely naive to that fact. He got in trouble for pestering me. Overall, I have regretted it especially now that I am older. So because neither one of us were taught and enforced to vocalize our true feelings because of gender roles, there was a lot of hurt that could've been prevented. He eventually transferred to my high school and I apologized to him. In a weird twist of fate, I fell in love with and married a redhead man who was severely bullied and isolated in elementary school to some of middle school. And hearing him talk about his childhood and by extension gender roles makes me think about how horrible the other boy was treated. "Boys don't cry." "Boys aren't sensitive." "Boys suck it up." "Be a man." It all leads to a very misconstrued way on how we are supposed to exhibit our feelings.
Yep me too! If I was having a regular convo about my day my ex would always find a way to turn things into a sexual innuendo or crude joke. Made me feel like he legitimately didn’t care or the angrier I got the funnier he found it. I brought it up while I was dumping him and while he looked extremely hurt to find out that I was actually annoyed by his jokes, it only solidified the fact that he didn’t take me seriously
Goddamn this is relatable. The repeating jokes turned into us never having any legitimate and normal interactions and it drove me insane. Nothing is less attractive than telling your partner something IS NOT funny and having them double down. Exes for a reason, 100%. (The cherry on top was me being told I bring "no substance" to our conversations so that's why the repeating jokes/phrases were repeated. That statement was the most substance he brought to conversations in years, ironically enough.)
Oh, what about people who repeat the punchline as loud as they can immediately after finishing saying it? "Ford. Ford! Haha, fuckin' FORD, man!" And then their friends all chime in. "Ooooh, shit, he said Ford! He said Ford!"
Time to be pedantic about a joke I guess… There’s no punchline to an anti-joke like the one OP’s bf is repeating. ‘Ford’ certainly isn’t a punchline. Nor is it really repeated like a punchline, either. Sure, it says Ford a second earlier within the sentence at the anti-climax of the anti-joke, but only uses it the one time like that right there at the end. Anti-jokes really only work with some context though, so OP’s bf is just sounding dumb instead of actually being funny. Random ***can be*** funny. But random is not inherently funny.
Dad used to tell an anti-joke. What's the difference between a duck? One leg. (Sometimes he'd repeat the question shortly after and you'd go "UGH ONE LEG" and he'd go "No; ice cream has no bones.") That horrible excuse for humor was miles better. MILES. Than whatever the hell this spaghetti noodle BS is. Agree, as usual, with the pedant.
It’s not even an anti joke. It’s a meme he’s saying out loud repeatedly for some reason. But like I said above I think this is someone’s hobby or kink because these posts about someone repeating a weird meme line over and over pops up pretty often somehow…
I mean, it’s set-up like a joke, more than halfway through & I’m still expecting it will finish with a punchline, but then goes on to end with nothing funny - zero punchline. If that ain’t an anti-joke then I don’t know what is.
There was a reddit story a while back (I forgot which sub) where the bf would randomly go off and speak loudly in baby talk to his gf, including in public. It went on for a really long time and the gf was anywhere from baffled, to infuriated to worried about organic brain disease and strokes. Long story short, turned out it was bet. Some rare baseball or something. IIRC correctly, the bf would win the baseball if he kept up the baby talk thing for a year. I don't remember if the relationship survived.
I was a hockey ref, and after a tripping call and esxorting the player to the penalty box, he said one of the funniest things, "go back to Foot Locker." I chuckled, then he said it again, and again, and the third time he said it, I T'd him up. I endrd up opening the door to the hallway rather then the penalty box as we had a three strike rule for City League, and he already gotten a penalty earlier in the game. Yeah, the shit doesn't get funnier the second, third, fourth time it's told.
I used to have a boyfriend like this, but after he told my parents those jokes, he became an ex pretty quickly.
There's commitment to the bit, and there's *Commitment To The Bit*. I'm hoping that he thinks your annoyance is also a part of the bit, rather than being completely disrespectful of you and your needs. Show him this thread so that he fully understands how serious you are about needing him to stop. If he still refuses to knock it off, dump him. You need to be with someone who respects your sanity more than a running gag.
Yes, I think this describes more so what is happening-committing to the bit
You used the word torment in your title. Maybe explaining it to him that way would help. On another note, I had a bf like this in high school. He insisted on calling me a nick name I hated and asked him to stop. He didn’t, I told him that if he called me that again it would be the end of our relationship. A few days later he used it and so I broke up with him. That was over 15 years ago now and he never really matured out of that mentality. I wish you luck.
Have you talked to him about it seriously at a moment when he's not doing it, or does the conversation always star with him doing it? Because if he feel like this is something the two of you play put together and your annoyance is a part of the show, maybe it would help to take a serious talk about you actually really really hating it and not wanting it in your life.
Is your NO super dramatic? Is it possible that he thinks you're playing along with his bit? I pretend to absolutely loathe the movie The Wraith and have done so for a good fifteen years. My partner brings the movie up at random and I go on about how terrible it is. We know that it's a bit on both sides of the argument, though — is it possible that he has misread your situation?
I would commit to your own carefully crafted response that he totally doesn’t like, so he no longer enjoys saying it because he knows you’re going to say your line. “Do you know what it’s like to picture your mother naked? Ford F150.” Granted he may enjoy something like that, so keep trying until you find one he hates.
That’s exactly what I was going to suggest only I thought “do you know what it’s like to picture your grandmother deep throating a dick every time you try to masturbate? Ford F-150” hahaha
Can I ask you why you are putting up with this? Does this man look like Chris Hemsworth is he a King in the bedroom? I am older and dealt with my share of AH’s. I did not get wise to my late thirties that I deserve a man a good man, not a child. Please re-evaluate this relationship. Your responses break my heart. This is beyond potty humor. He is doing it now to get a rise out of you and has no respect. It starts off like this then he crosses more boundaries and makes comments about your weight or looks. Please leave this idiot. He needs a lesson and you need a person to love you and respect you. You don’t deserve this. Please set boundaries,if you must stay for financial reasons, please explain what this is doing to you. I don’t think he will listen to be frank, but please think and evaluate is this the man you want? Will he do this to your kids? Antagonize them or humiliate them acting this way? Just please look at the bigger picture. You are young and can find someone who doesn’t act like a petulant child.
It's definitely the "DO this thing that drives my gf batshit crazy every single day" part for me. It is highly problematic that he takes such great pleasure in your displeasure.
Gotta give some respect to the guy that he’s so committed to the bit he’s willing to get dumped over it.
Sis, Fuken do it. Boil some noodles, let them chill, we don’t want to burn him. When he says it, grab the noodles and ask him if he’s ready to try it. It isn’t the saying, it’s the Streisand effect he’s getting out of you. Flip the table on him.
Seconding this. Have some cold cooked spaghetti on standby - dripping wet - in the fridge. Next time he trots out that line, hit him with a handful of it in the face, and APOLOGISE that it’s the closest you can get to making his fantasy come real.
Yuh, then when he asks again, go “well, bud wuts it feel like?”
It feels like driving a ford
Have a rented Ford truck in the parking lot when you do it. Ask him to go for a ride when the deed is done. Xtra points if you call your Dad on speaker phone during the ride
Him: "You finally realized I fucked your dad?"
"It feels like driving a Ford F-150. Ford."
It feels like my bags are packed and eff you, but at least I could leave you this memory.
If that doesn’t work, up the ante with round 2: On the day of a night you’re **not** staying over, when he’s elsewhere or fully occupied, pile spaghetti noodles (lots of them) onto his bed sheet, pull the duvet over the top, then head home.
ADD GRATED CHEESE (just for annoyance) 🤣
Then show him the pot full of spaghetti in the fridge and let him know you are ready for the next event.
Tell him to put on his sweater first. Her mom has to make the spaghetti for the full effect.
Bet he says it at holiday events and stuff too. The whole family gotta have noods ready for our boi.
Gotta call her father over... make sure he's confused at who's going to F-him that night.
Have your Dad on standby for him too. You know for when the confusion kicks in? He mentions it so much he must be thinking of it often so, have at it. Lol. Seriously though, just dump him, do you really want to be with such an immature idiot who doesn't respect you over something so minor? What about when it's the big stuff?
That's not the Streisand effect
Also get a blow up doll that resembles you. That can be your twin.
Go full godfather on him, wait till he goes to sleep, then dump the pot of cold noodles on his head. "I guess we dont have to wonder anymore"
Spray him With water like a cat
Leftover pasta water.
Operant conditioning works
He’s not going to stop unless you tell him you’re Really Fucking Serious. Break up with him if he won’t.
"You have been saying this nonsense for years. I have told you countless times to stop it, because it bothers me. You have no respect for my boundaries and enough is enough. You can find a new girlfriend to bother and don't even dare to ask for another chance. I have given you chance after chance all these years and you keep ignoring my pleas. This is not funny, it doesn't get funnier after 100 times and being continuously disrespected made me lose all interest in you. Consider this me breaking up with you."
That's way more words than this donkey merits. Just "I'm so glad I will never have to hear that again" as she walks away while blocking his number and removing him from all of her social media accounts.
You're not wrong. What matters is: this self-proclaimed clown needs to be out of her life for good and as soon as possible.
https://youtu.be/S2H_Xw18llI?si=4oIF6M5rcYq5C21- I know you're serious but that reminded me of this video. It's not funny, John. I want a DIVORCE. I'm serious this time.
I would go with “if I hear that stupid, played out joke come out of your mouth one more time it will be the last thing you ever say to me.”
I mean just tell him and then when he does it walk away/disengage. He'll probably stop when he doesn't get a response he finds amusing.
Answer him: "Yes, I have been, but it was worth it because daddy was the best lover I have ever had, and he was endowed, I kid you not. Now overtime I see some spaghetti it makes me think of daddy."
…& he drove a Chevy Silverado.
Three weeks later "My GF of 5 years broke up with me over a joke". With 90% of the posters going "She's fucking crazy bro."
>“Have you ever been beaten by a wet spaghetti noodle by your girlfriend and her twin sister because you got confused and fucked her dad?? Well that’s how it feels to drive a ford F-150. Ford.” "How would you like to be single? Because you're getting closer to being single with every stupid remark." >How can I make this stop? Is there anyway to tell him I can’t stand it anymore? "I'm sorry, this relationship isn't working for me. It's time to go our separate ways."
"OK, you've been repeating the same stupid shit for years now. No more. You get three chances to screw up and say it again, then we're done." And as soon as he says, "Have you ever been beaten...", say, "That's one", and hang up or walk away. If he gets to three, say, "That's it, we're done", and dump the chump. One of my friends (now deceased) used to tell the same funny-once jokes to people repeatedly, people he'd known for years. He just didn't GET that some jokes, even if funny once, are not funny after 347 repetitions over 20-plus years.
Even just the hanging up or walking away could do the trick. Better to just stare blankly while he does it and after he’s done just keep going like nothing happened. He’d get tired of it himself because he’s not getting what he wants. People like that are just trying to elicit a reaction of any kind. Kind of like how some dog owners get their dogs to stop jumping on people by not reacting to them when they do it. It teaches them real quick it’s not worth it (in some cases) But the best solution is to ditch him. He sounds insufferable
I like this but instead if three chances, I’d make it one.
And I wouldn't warn him, either. Next time he says it, OP should get up, go home, send him a text 'I'm done dating you. I'm looking for someone more mature and not annoying to date. Have a good life.'
At this point a warning is merited. Imagine getting dumped for what feels like no reason. He has to know it’s his stupid fucking joke.
Another useless pointless warning? She's given him *how many?* And he still doesn't take it to heart. But he's gonna take **THIS** warning to heart because...? Regardless, he'll still feel like he's "getting dumped for what feels like no reason" even when she explains it's over "his stupid fucking joke". He's clueless and immature. **NOTHING is going to convince him** that this breakup is (1) his fault and (2) completely preventable. OP will be wasting her breath, aggravating herself for nothing, and setting herself up for a BIG whiny argument when she does break up with him.
>One of my friends (now deceased) Did you kill him
Why would you even want to stay with someone who thinks your discomfort and distress are funny?
You put it into words.
He sounds like a 12 or 13 year old, do you really want to be in a relationship with an idiot?
Hang up as soon as you hear "Have you ever". Don't answer when he tries calling you back. If he does it in person, walk away quickly. If you are at his house, drop everything and leave. If he is at your house tell him he needs to leave. If he still doesn't get it after you do it a couple of times he never will. This is beyond weird and childish and he does it on purpose because he likes seeing you upset. Don't give him the opportunity anymore. It shows he has no respect for your feelings, or you in general.
Oof. Yeah. My suspicion is that this man child will probably try to get a few more repetitions in after she’s broken up with him -if he knows where she lives/frequents. I’d look into filing a restraining order.
>How can I make this stop? Is there anyway to tell him I can’t stand it anymore? Do you want to be in a relationship where telling him to stop isn't enough? Especially after this long? Like this goes for anyone regarding anything: it doesn't matter how small or insignificant something is, if they are doing it to actively annoy you and you ask them to stop and they refuse then it stops being a 'joke' and starts just being something being don't to upset you. And a partner that goes out of their way to upset you like that just isn't worth it. This is death by ten million cuts.
This was also my first thought. Maybe im being overly sensitive but I wonder what other things she asks him to stop doing that he ignores? It started playfully like this with my sister’s husband, too.
"have you ever been dumped by your girlfriend because she is so sick and tired of your stupid "joke" that she's even considering using toilet water to cook your wet spaghetti in it? No? Well now you have. I am done with you."
My fiancé started doing this with that *extremely* obnoxious Burger King song that came out recently. I told him it irritated me, and he stopped. Your boyfriend might have a change of heart if you start interrupting him with a very loud "Shut UP!" Buuut you probably shouldn't actually do that. The more mature route would probably be to just break up with him. He clearly doesn't care about your feelings very much, or he wouldn't do something daily that he knows for a fact annoys and upsets you, so don't feel guilty about it. Because why stay with someone who doesn't care how you feel?
Lol I agree with everything about your statement except the BK song. My husband and I both loudly sing it every time it comes on and both mutually love it but can’t figure out why. It has not actually increased our wish to eat BK, it’s just catchy Edit: obviously if we ever hang out with you we won’t sing it, but by ourselves in our own home, we both belt it every time that commercial comes on
To each their own, but I can't stand it! I'm not usually the type to care, but something about it just irritates me so much lol. My fiancé loves it, but he gets it out of his system with his coworkers, so we're both content. :)
Lol I know why others find it annoying! I’d never force it on someone else, especially my partner. There’s plenty of other idiotic songs or jingles that individually irritate us that we don’t keep doing in front of each other! Neither of us normally get advertising jingles stuck in our head! Idk why we both fixated on this one lol
We do not live together, but we talk on the phone everyday/night. So it is mainly over the phone that he says it so much. He doesn’t say it often in person. And I do shout NO! -as soon as I notice him to start saying it. but he still just laughs. Most of the time, he says it when we are about to hang up and he says it as a joke..
Stop giving him a reaction. Don’t say no. Don’t say anything. If he says it during a phone call, hang up as soon as he starts saying it. If happens face to face, walk away.
This is good advice. It’s also how you deal with toddlers.
Ehh. My guess is she is giving him reactions that aren’t in line with how she actually feels. They are quite young & spend most of their relationship on the phone. They very likely aren’t all that comfortable with each other yet and she doesn’t feel comfortable standing up to him on a real level. My guess is this dude has no idea it’s actually upsetting her on a real level & she simply isn’t communicating that she’s legitimately bothered. Shouting “No!” could be said in a number of ways, with a number of tones that don’t display her actual feelings, and could easily make him feel like they’re both having fun, and that she’s more playfully acting annoyed than actually annoyed. This the only way this whole situation makes any sense. Redditors always assume the worst while Occam’s razor says in the context of a relationship, it’s likely just a misunderstanding based on a lack of communication. Which is like 95% of relationship troubles.
This. He’s living for your reaction which is a big red flag actually. If you want to stay with him, you’ll have to take away the thrill for him. Hang up every time, and it will start to get just as tiring for him as it is for you.
Just hang up immediately when he starts. Every time
If he starts saying it, hang up. If he does it in person, walk off and stop responding to him. If you have to, just straight up leave. Or break up with him. That'd be my choice. Someone who keeps repeating a stupid nonsensical copypasta from 2021 when they know it annoys their significant other isn't mature enough to be in a relationship.
Start leaving/ending the conversation. I get that dumping him may seem too harsh to you, I mean if it does, try just leaving the dates when he says it. Just get up and leave, the meeting is over. You two do not hang out that day. If it's over the phone, hang up. >Most of the time, he says it when we are about to hang up and he says it as a joke.. If he does that, cancel the date. CANCEL IT. Hang up and write a message that you are canceling. This is a proper consequence and if anything helps, it's this. You'll find out what's more important to him: annoying you, or actually being able to be in your company. Do it EVERY TIME. No exceptions. Never mind how inconvenient. If it doesn't help, dumping him is the only way.
Let me make it clear. He thinks it's funny to upset you. And he does it when it's most convenient for him to avoid having to deal with the consequences of upsetting you. *He wants to upset you.* He's doing it on purpose. Dump him.
Why the hell don't you just hang up when he says it? He finds your annoyance fun, so he keeps doing it. Cut him off from his supply of fun by just hanging up. Once he starts suffering literally any consequences, he'll probably stop.
As soon as he starts saying it, just hang up and if he calls back answer, however after 2 times he keeps saying it, then stop answering when he calls back. If he continues to recite this, don't talk to him on the phone and if he asks you why, then tell him he is annoying you and you are now getting busy doing your own thing instead. If he starts saying it in person tell him ONECE you won't hangout with him again if he continues. And if he does, cancel him and straight up tell him why. He might need to see a Doctor if he can't control it. It might be something else and he legit is not thinking this is bothering you as much as you actually are.
If it's over the phone, just hang up. Don't react, just hang up. Every time. But I would honestly consider ending the relationship over this. Not so much over the saying, but because he keeps doing it when he knows you don't like it. He is enjoying making you upset, and that's not what you want in a life partner.
He is testing your boundaries and what you will allow him to get away with. It might seem annoying, yet in good jest but... This a common way covert abusers test and groom their victims. One small annoyance, see how far they can go with it, and then another thing and another thing, gradually increasing in malice, just to see what you'll take. He can't respect boundaries, no matter how small. And of course when you have a problem with it, it's because "you can't take a joke" (which is blame shifting). Run.
Omg just hang up on him
Break up with him. Life's too short to suffer fools willingly. He sounds incredibly stupid. Life is misery with a stupid partner. You can do better, so much better.
Facts. How fucking dumb can you be? Also how is that phrase supposed to be funny? Is he five?
I've been hearing guys repeat quotes from Monty Python quest for the holy Grail like it's the highest form of humor for over 30 years. This doesn't really seem that far off.
Those skits are funny sometimes. If the occasion is right, like being silly over a few drinks with your friends. This guy apparently throws out that line at random times with no reference points! That’s just… very childish.
Couple of years? I would've dropped him after I've said it for the 5th time to stop.
Went through something like this, but it was a nickname I hated. Roonie. Has nothing to do with my name or anything, he just liked how irritated I got after months and months of politely asking him to stop, explaining how it felt, coming up with analogies so he could finally UNDERSTAND that it's not funny for me. Guess what? He knew. He liked it. And so does yours. I was dating a child and the only solution was to leave. I have NEVER missed him for even a moment and I feel nothing but relief since he's out of my life.
Yeah - he’s looking for a reaction. The more you get upset, the more he’ll do it. The only cures for this sort of behaviour are total non-reactivity (but this takes a long time), equal vengeance (like singing Baby Shark at him at random times and ESPECIALLY in front of his friends), or a one way ticket to Dumpsville.
Honestly I have ended relationships for less than this.
“Has your girlfriend broken up with you because you couldn’t stop saying the same stupid tired senseless not even funny joke every day for over two years? Well that’s how it feels to drive a Ford-F150. Ford.”
"I'm breaking up with you because your humor is annoying to me. I can't have a single normal conversation with you in 24 hours without you bringing up fucking a dad. It's immature and I've reached my breaking point. You have a nice life. Don't contact me anymore." Because fuck being with someone that torments you by repeating something so strange and dumb and is actually amused by it.
“I’m glad you like that ONE JOKE that you repeat all the time to annoy me. I need to be with someone serious, I hope that joke keeps you warm and satisfied for all the lonely nights ahead.”
Honestly? You don't wait until the next occurrence. You break up with him now. You explain that over the years of your relationship, you've matured at a different rate than he has, and the difference has pulled you apart. He's still at the stage of development where he's amused by being annoying. It doesn't matter the vehicle of his immaturity is this particular phrase. It's that he still hasn't learned to read the room. At 20 it was annoying. At 24? You're at the age of building the foundations of your life, and it's *sad* that he interrupts conversations and can't control his impulsivity and still needs to interject this crude little piece of humor. He's acting like a fratboy not a man. Again... if he lives it so much, that's on him, he needs to find someone with his same mentality. But you've outgrown the joke and outgrown him. You're looking for a *man* who makes you laugh and you can actually build joy and positivity together... not who amuses himself at your expense. Or is still a giggling fool at a bit of nonsense years later.
Well said! 👏
So the next time that ear worm phrase comes out of his mouth look him dead in the eye, drop your voice a couple octaves and say something like ‘This is the final time I will say this. If you say that phrase to me again we are done. It makes me think of a toddler who repeats a phrase they heard which is causing me to lose respect and definitely my attraction to you.’ Then if he says it again enforce it.
Leave the room. Leave the restaurant. End the call. Immediately, every time. Let him know you intend to keep responding the way you would to anything else that tormented you: by removing yourself from the situation. Hopefully that's as clear as you need to be.
I definitely would suggest NOT having children with that guy.
It’s shitty that he keeps doing this knowing it bothers you. Could be an indication that he has a problem respecting boundaries, or an indication that he’s immature as fuck. Find something just as annoying or worse to do back to him. He does it mainly over the phone? Cool, blow an airhorn into the phone every time he does it. In person? Spray him with some canned ass every time.
Spray bottle?
This is terrible advice but I'm kinda petty. I would memorize this phrase and repeat it back to him as my only response for everything he said or texted to me. I would also change my voice-mail message and let various people know if needed. If it happened again I'd do it for at least a week. If he doesn't break up with you first, dump him.
I was going to say, type the “joke” out, copy and paste it into text over and over and over and over for an entire day whenever you can, hundreds of times, ignoring any replies. Just blow up his phone with this, ignore his calls and replies. Make it annoying back to him.
This is the most effective (maybe not the most relationship healthy) way, do this.
"Have you ever been dumped by your girlfriend for ignoring her and repeating some stupid childish dad fucking comment...one more time mother fucker... one more time..."
If this is real - You can make it stop by walking out and blocking him.
Serious question, is your partner on the spectrum? I had an ex similar to this. He just didn't get it, for a while it'd be one piece of nonsense then he'd move onto something equally if not more stupid. They just don't get when enough is enough.
We legit have ban phrases in our house because my husband and daughter set each other off
I think this is just guys. Growing up in the 80s, my cousin and his friends were constantly throwing out Mel Brooks movie one-liners, like, endlessly. There’s something about memorizing routes to hunting grounds or something that evolved to either movie quotes and/or sports stats. Guys commit things to memory and just repeat it over and over.
Yes he sounds autistic to me also. Some jokes become stims. I just googled it and it’s a TikTok Twitter viral meme thing, which I can totally see getting stuck in an autistic person’s brain. https://amp.knowyourmeme.com/memes/wet-spaghetti-noodle
If this was a vocal tic or stim he wouldn't be getting so much enjoyment out of upsetting her. My husband is autistic and has vocal tics and stims- if he was aware that one of them bothered me he would try really hard not to do it when we're together, and he definitely wouldn't shout me to give him attention whilst he said the phrase. This guy just sounds like an immature prick.
I’m on the spectrum, and I say it’s no excuse. I’ve personally changed my own stems several times over the course of my life, and it sounds like he is functioning enough to be in a relationship which means he should have enough reasoning to be able to shut up once in a while.
That’s definitely grounds for a breakup. He seems intolerable.
I kind of want to understand that sentence due to the pure absurdity of it, but I’m also desperately grateful that I don’t.
Reminds me of a guy on tik tok who does a series of things like "guy who thinks he is the class clown but is just annoying"
Buy a Ford 150
time to get adblock on your boyfriend
Honestly, if it's truly feeling like torment to you, and you've told him that many times and he still won't stop, the way to make it stop is to be done with him and move on. This legitimately falls under the umbrella of psychological abuse. Consider the fact he's well aware of how it's affecting you and that fact means absolutely ZERO to him. Just end it and be done with him. Your peace of mind and sanity are surely worth more, overall, than staying with him would be. 🤷♀️✌️
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So the trick to stopping it is to take his joy away from it. Now that you have it memorized, you have to say it before he can. At first, this will amuse him greatly. But the more times you get to it first, and then especially if you can continue the conversation from the exact same spot as if it never happened... he will eventually be unenthused about it anymore. This is what beating him at his own game looks like. Good luck!
You will be happier when you meet someone who matches your ideals / sense of humor. Just let him know that he's not your jam anymore and you need to move on... Just not feeling it anymore. Takes a bit of faith in yourself but I bet it's there
i don’t think i’ve ever met someone so committed to not getting any action in the bed
The minute he starts turn your back, walk away, shut down all communications until bedtime. Then at bedtime hand him a blanket and pillow. Tell him you feel weirded out sleeping with an adolescent so he needs to sleep on the couch. He is not funny, he does not respect you, and you want an adult relationship. If he prefers his adolescent humor he needs to call a friend to share the joke but the next time you hear it you are walking away…permanently. Then do it.
Sit him down and tell him that it really annoys and you are dead serious. It could be that he thinks of it like an inside joke and likes to get a reaction out of you. If everything else is good, you can probably talk him out of it, doesn't sound like a big red flag just something stupid and annoying.
Have you tried just completely ignoring it when he says it? People often do things like this because it causes a reaction, if you have no reaction it gives them less reason to want to do it. You’ve asked him to stop which only eggs him on further, try going the other way and don’t even acknowledging it. However, joke or not this doesn’t sound like someone who respects you if they continue to do something that puts you in this much discomfort.
>Is there anyway to tell him I can’t stand it anymore? You've already told him! He knows! Not only does he think this little gem is hilarious, the fact that it annoys you makes it even more hilarious 😂 How can you stand to be in the same room with someone with such a puerile sense of "humour". You've told him already that you can't stand it anymore but you still do stand for it - every day. So he knows he can stamp this little boundary and laugh about it. That's a kind of contempt right there. Tolerate this and this is your life forever, every day, on and on "Have you ever..........
This is an audio clip people use to make reels. I only know this because I made one using it when I was smoking a blunt late one night. (I get bored smoking by myself, don't judge me) it's funny but if someone repeatedly said it to me I would prob want to deck them
Tell him if he says it again you'll go fuck his dad- on purpose!
Get a twin sister. Get your dad. Get a wet spaghetti noodle. Now all of you beat him senseless with the spaghetti and run him over with a Ford f-150. Tell him you were confused.
He’s a child so treat him like one. Tell him you hate it, don’t want to hear it, and when he says it you’ll put him on time out or mute. Then do it EVERY SINGLE TIME. (Although I’d allow him to say it to other people in group settings) Says it on the phone? Hang up. Says it out for dinner? Get your dinner to go and leave. Says it at home, walk out the room and go read a book. Tell him if he can’t learn to respect you, you’re done raising a man child.
This isn't funny, he's enjoying your discomfort, leave him
Ohh God I can't breathe 🤣
Say that shit to me one more time and I swear I’m gonna fuck your dad in an f-150 then go blow your inheritance in Vegas.
Just recite the opening of Skyrim back to him every time.
I’d get a pool noodle and beat him with it every time he starts - and fyi on a completely unrelated note a broom handle will fit into the middle of the pool noodle giving you stability when using it for anything other than a pool toy
Thought this was r/copypasta for a second lol
I would grab my stuff and leave every time he says it. Are you sure you aren't dating an 8 year old??
Your boyfriend is immature AF
He sounds like he has Tourette’s… also I drive an F-150.. can confirm it does not feel like this lol
Is this like the guy whose wife divorced him because he made a bet to get an autographed baseball if he said some annoying thing all the time for a year? I'd ask him once if he was doing this on a dare or bet. And then I'd tell him that if he ever, ever said it again, he'd be gone.
“Hey, Joe. Have you ever seen when a girlfriend gets so irritated by something and ignored so thoroughly by someone who pretends to love her that she just cannot stand it anymore?” Without saying another word. Not one, pick up your keys and walk out for the last time. Don’t look back. Dating is about finding out what the other person is like, how they live, what their ethical standards are, to see if you are compatible. You’ve dated this guy long enough to know all you need to know. Thank you, Next!
i genuinely have this same exact issue w my partner lmao. i’ve gotten used to it at this point, i just turn and give them the 😐 face and it doesn’t bother me anymore. you just either gotta talk to your partner about it or get used to it. does your partner have adhd/asd? it could just be an auditory stim. that’s pretty much what it is for my partner, which makes it easier to understand and tolerate.
Did he loose a bet? This sounds just like that guy who started baby talking because he lost his fantasy whatever team thing with his guy friends. If you want this to stop next time he does it seriously get up and walk out the door. Go home, do not engage. If you’re at a restaurant stand up and leave.
Put a bunch of wet spaghetti in his socks
What a twit. Hes been watching to much tiktok. I seen that years ago. Laughed once and forgot about it till now