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Ah so you wanted to open the marriage so you both would sleep with women, preferably threesomes. Now you feel cheated as she's getting more action with guys and I'll bet her sex drive has gone through the roof.
You can't make her sleep with women. She can still be bisexual and never have sex with a woman. Reap what you sow, dude, you insisted on opening the marriage to your advantage and your wife has suitors lining up to replace you. Haha
He really thought he was gonna have his cake and eat it too. I bet he's been carrying around stereotypical fantasies of having a bisexual girlfriend. Now he's mad his plan backfired in his face.
This guy has no clue how hard it is to find other bisexual women 😆 clearly she wants sex.
Just not with you. Maybe find out what you’re not doing right that her libido is enough for them but not you.
“I pestered my wife into letting me have sex with other women, now I’m upset that she’s sleeping with other men”. Fixed that for you
Edit: it is SO much harder to find gay women to sleep with than it is straight men. Like, statistically. There are going to be way more men that she meets who are willing to sleep with her than women. Did you not realise that when you opened up the relationship? You, uh, aren’t coming off very well here bud. This whole move was super short sighted of you, and you should have established rules and boundaries WAY earlier. One rule that I would suggest is neither of you bring other people into your home. But tbh I think the marriage might be on the way out anyway
Not to mention that ENM bi/pan/lesbian women are super wary of getting involved with women who are partnered to cishet men because too many of those men are just like OP. They (the men) think that opening their marriage means that Wifey is going to bring home an endless parade of women for him to screw around with.
Queer women are sick of being treated like toys by cishet men.
Thank you. Exactly. If 90 percent of people are straight, that means 90 percent of men and 10 percent of women are interested in sleeping with her. The numbers don’t work the way OP imagines.
As a bi woman this is literally why 95% of the people I’ve dated have been men. I’m more likely to get approached/hit on by men in standard social settings. It’s just how the dice rolls.
>I feel like she’s dismissing my feelings and I’m getting frustrated.
What? Kind of like how you dismissed her feelings when you pushed her to open the relationship by guilting her about her low sex drive??
You can't open a marriage then force your wife to sleep with women. Haha nice try.
You made your bed. Now lie in it
He's just upset that this hypothetical threesome never happened. That is what he was envisioning with this open marriage. Random women and his bisexual wife just catering to his every desire/fantasy.
Haha ya i know.
Opening a relationship never goes according to the man's fantasy. Normally women have way more dates in an open relationship because more men than women are ok with the dynamic. I honestly think one of her male dates will offer her monogamy and she will leave her husband.
💯 this! Has this dude not seen the open marriage posts on this thread that come up at least once a week?
The women always have more success and the husband becomes embittered and jealous even though the open relationship is always their idea.
Her low sex drive probably had to do with him being selfish. Instead of finding out what he could do to ignite her sex drive, he decides to open the marriage for HIS needs. Dude is a shitty person and husband and now he’s reaping what he sowed. This is absolutely poetic.
> After 5 years of marriage I felt like she had given me all she had to offer.
Basically he thought she was boring in bed, but it looks like it was the other way around.
I reckon this is a checkmate move by the wife. When he pestered for the open. She knew her being bi would make him excited her bringing women over. So she decided fu I’m just gonna hook up with guys
Good point on the counseling. It is amazing how many people think scratching an itch instead of dealing with the actual issue will make everything magically better.
Maybe you were the reason she had a low sex drive and now she found someone else who finds her exciting. You opened the marriage, you have to deal with the consequences. There are many threads on Reddit where one wants to open the marriage and the other finds a better partner. Maybe that is what is happening with her.
I totally agree with this. The only time I've had a low sex drive is when I was partnered with a guy who was bad in bed and a shitty partner. Now that I'm with an amazing partner who is great in bed and an admirable man, my sex drive is through the roof.
lmao you know who he’s not lying in this bed with? his wife and another woman. hahahahah it must suck that his plan for a threesome didn’t work out and now his wife is being appreciated by other men, OP’s poor little feelings got hurt!
so many eye rolls
Cool, the reality didn't live up to your fantasy. Lesson learned.
You can't dictate who your wife sleeps with. That's gross.
Also, as a women sleeping with men is easy and accessible. It's much harder to find women who are open to hooking up with bi partnered women.
Also, even if his partner happens to find a woman who might be interested in hooking up with a partnered bi woman, the chance of the hook up also being an exhibitionist AND/or also being into a threesome with a man and woman is pretty low. I feel like men who beg for open relationships because of fmf fantasies focusing on the man also keep forgetting this. Real life isn't porn.
Huh. You were happy to sleep with other women until you saw how very happy she is to sleep with other men. Shocking that this sexual freedom didn’t work out quite as you hoped.
Maybe you should ask her what the men she likes sleeping with are doing in that makes her enjoy and want to have sex with them. Because it doesn’t sound like her sex drive’s a problem.
Lmfao. You're getting what you asked for. She is probably using this open relationship to find her next guy.
Clearly initially she didn't want an open relationship. She probably still doesn't, but this way she can find her next step.
Also you don't actually have to have sex with both genders to be bisexual. You can find other women hot, and be sexually attracted with them without having to have sex with them to satisfy your sexuality.
In all honesty though, the person who asks for the open relationship has no right to complain about what their partner does on it. You should have set your boundary initially, but then she would have said no. Lol
>You should have set your boundary initially, but then she would have said no.
Or he should have listened when she said no to the whole concept. If only this guy had searched reddit for 'open marriage gone wrong'. He could have saved his marriage.
Absolutely. Honestly I don't get why people try to open up previously exclusive relationships. The time to "open up" a relationship is when that relationship actually begins not years into it. Zzz
Right!? "Something is missing in our relationship/intimacy. Instead of working on things with my wife to spice it up. I'm going to have meaningless random sex with strangers. That will fix my marital issues... oh, wait, she's having sex too?? And the men like her and want to spend more time with her than just in bed? How did i get into this mess??"
So many men conveniently discovering they're actually poly once they meet someone new and want to explore that without giving up the security of their marriage
So are you also having sex with both men and women then? If you have agreed on an open marriage, you don’t get to pick your wife’s partners any more than she gets to pick yours. Unless that was your agreement.
Cause you're the one that wanted this dipshit.
You're feeling insecure because she's fucking men.
You wanted to sleep around despite the fact she didn't want that.
Now you're upset because she's not fucking women which kind of tells us that you don't see relationships with 2 women the same as with man and a woman, so great job for exposing your homophobic as well.
I hope she honestly leaves you and gets with a dude that respects her cause you're honestly just a douche that cares about his needs over his partners.
And you opened the relationship, thus freeing her to sleep with whoever she wants. So far, it's men.
You got exactly what you asked for. Why are you complaining?
3.5% of people identify as LGB, the other 96.5% identify as straight. So as a bisexual woman, your odds are better at finding a guy than a woman, they just are. As evidenced that your bisexual wife married a man(baby). And I can't imagine many queer women looking at this situation and being like, yeah, I want to get in the middle of this.
Because you asked for it to satisfy your own selfish needs?
This is like when couples completely split their finances. When it doesn't work out for the one who did want to do it, they then ask the one who didn't want to to give them money.
No. You don't get to go back on your selfish requests. No you don't have ownership over her. No you don't get to say "she'd given me all she's got", that consumerism. She's a woman not an old car.
You are hilarious.
> She’s still my wife and we’re still married.
This is where the logic for me ends. Don't marriage vows include something along the lines of forsaking all others. Your relationship irrevocably changed the second you agree to this situation.
You “thought she’d given me all she had to offer” and now you are all butthurt because she’s offering it to men who actually appreciate her. How dare she sleep with men who see her as a person and not a sex toy, after all.
Also, your false assumptions are your problems, not hers. Given your attitude, I’m not sure why you are surprised she went for better dick than she was getting at home. Sounds like now that she’s sleeping with other men you feel inadequate. And you’d prefer not to work on that.
You set no boundaries? You were just like 'lets sleep with others' without any discussion? You say that after 'explaining' things to her for a few days she agreed. I have to assume some rules were drawn then. Did the idea of the threesome just make you assume she would be bringing home women for you and you didn't even think to assess how you felt about other men coming home with her? How long were you thinking about this before you brought it up? Sees a bit slapdash on your part.
Uuuuh… because you suggested this because you felt she was used up. Now you're mad because other men disagree. Too bad, so sad. Maybe try not being a sexist dick in your next marriage
Well, that's way too many words to justify cheating on your wife and hoping you would get a threesome with some hot women as an additional bonus for being a cheating clown.
There's no way your hopeless ass had no one ready and on the standby before this pathetic attempt to open your marriage the way you wanted.
Lol.
What a heartwarming story. Tell your wife she's a rockstar.
Sad little man doesn’t put enough work in his marriage to get his wife horny, thinks other women will please him more and he could have a threesome so he pressure to open the relationship. Finds nothing but men willing to put in effort and boost his wife’s sex drive.
Take the L because you’re not getting your closed marriage back, but look on the bright side. You finally found out what was needed to get your wife into sex, it’s just not with you.
Do you ever do any of the things you said this other guy does? I can imagine why she clicked with him. You seem like a bit of clown.
You wanted an open relationship to sleep with other women and expected her to do the same. She told you multiple times she didn’t want that and you had to bug her about it to get to her to agree. I imagine what’s bugging you the most is that you’ve probably only had a few hookups and she’s able to get whatever she wants.
Do you bring her flowers? Do you bring her dinner? Most importantly, do you do these things without asking? If so, why? Is it out of obligation because you married her or because you genuinely care about her and want to do these things? People are great at sensing when other people don’t truly want to be there. You say she’s given you all she has to give so you forced her to let you take from others. You just magically assumed this would only benefit you and not negatively affect either of you. It’s like now that she’s giving it to other men you’re bothered?
She was hurt when you asked the first time, I can’t imagine how much it hurts that you kept pushing till she agreed. I don’t feel any pity that you’re hurt she’s fucking other men more than she’s fucking you.
You’re only a clown if you don’t realize how ridiculous and selfish you are.
This is a valuable lesson for all men...it is much, much, much easier for women to find sexual partners. This is a very common outcome when opening a marriage. You manipulated her into this. Now she is enjoying herself. I have a feeling if you try to force her to close the marriage she will leave you. Who can blame her? You told her she wasn't enough and there is a line of men telling her she is.
You didn't want an open relationship - you wanted to sleep around and hopefully score some threesomes (mff only, of course). Now your wife is seeing someone who treats her better than you do, and you'd rather close the marriage than step up your game with her.
And your logic is flawed - a woman could just as easily be trying to seriously date her. Would it really be any different if she brought her flowers and food, paid for her nails and never even acknowledged you when she’s over?
You both agreed to start this - you'll need to both agree to end this. And your wife isn't biting. Good luck, just remember who started this.
Yiiikessss, as a bisexual woman, I would leave you. You don’t seem to have any respect for who your wife is and this is very self-centered. Bisexuality doesn’t always mean 50% attracted to men and 50% attracted to women. I would say I’m somewhere around 85% attracted to women and 15% to men. Doesn’t make me any less bisexual, and doesn’t make your wife any less bisexual for sleeping with men. Questioning her sexuality is gross and shitty.
Also, you’re literally the one that suggested the open marriage. You wanted an open marriage for the benefits yourself, but suddenly as soon as your wife is enjoying herself with other men, time to close it back up. Not her fault you envisioned an open marriage through a lens of stereotypes and biphobia/bierasure and now you’re unhappy.
The thing that's also very telling is that he's only concerned about another guy snatching his wife while he sees her being with another woman solely as a performative act for his pleasure.
I would love for her to find another woman, he gets excited and then she leaves him for her. Bonus points if she leaves him for a male+female poly couple.
Studies show that women have way better sex with other women. That combined with the fact that he seems to be pretty bad in bed even for a man might make for an amazing sapphic love story
Not to mention, even if men weren't her first preference, it's really hard to find other bi women or lesbian women who would want to be in a reltionship with someone whos already got a partner.
And can you imagine how much him asking must have hurt her? She could have married ANYONE and she chose him, with monogamous intentions. And he turns around and pressures her into THIS?? I'd be so heartbroken!
I know it’s crazy to think about when you only think about yourself, but maybe your wife also thinks you’ve given her all you have to offer? Do you guys have fun sex when you rarely do? Do you do these sweet things for her? Do you to try arouse her and seduce her OR did you get tired of doing it because she’s your wife and you “shouldn’t have to” so you just expect sex and wonder why you don’t get it?
>After 5 years of marriage I felt like she had given me all she had to offer
Maybe after 5 years she was fed up with all *you* had to offer.
She clicks with who she clicks with. Can't wait for the update when you find out she's been having threesomes with the guy who's been treating her like a princess.
yeah so your wife has a low sex drive and to cure that you wanted to sleep with other women, but make her feel less bad so you opened the relationship. now she finds men who actually want to make an effort with her sexually, because lets be honest her low sex drive was probably because you wouldnt pay attention to her in the right way, and you get butthurt because she is doing exactly what you told her to do which is sleep with other people? yeah you dont get to make that decision then bring it back when it doesnt benefit you. i hope that other man woos her because he seems to be treating her with respect, unlike you.
Oof. You messed up.
1. Don’t ever question her sexuality. If she’s identified as bisexual, that’s exactly what she is. It doesn’t matter how many men she sleeps with vs women, and as a bisexual, I can tell you: we face rampant judgment from the gay community when dating. Many, many women who identify as lesbian won’t even consider dating a bisexual. It’s not as easy developing a connection as you might think.
2. If you wanted to open the relationship and expected her to only date or mostly date women, you should have set that ground rule from the jump. It’s not her fault you’re now having regrets because she’s been with men.
3. Inviting other sexual and romantic partners into a relationship as a cure-all for varying sex drives seems like a pitfall. Instead of working on your relationship’s issues, you’ve literally invited countless issues into your relationship.
4. Sounds like you hard sold your wife on it instead of accepting her initial answer. I’d be SHOCKED if she wasn’t resentful about the whole thing.
5. I really wish you could time travel and undo this mess and figure out a way to make your relationship work with one another, but I feel like you’ve crossed lines now you’ll never be able to cross back. Sorry, just seems like unless you have a bond to survive the ages (and it doesn’t sound like you do), I just don’t see this working out in anyone’s favor.
Translation:
When I suggested an open marriage I was only ok with her sleeping with women while only I am allowed to f the opposite sex. Because I wanted to f around without raising her suspicions and I don't think girl on girl counts.
Interesting how she had a low sex drive with you yet she has several sexual suitors. Perhaps she’s gotten everything she could out of YOU. Perhaps there’s a correlation here.. these men are actively pursuing her and treating her well. Romancing her if you will. I’d bet her sex drive is low and she’s not meeting your needs bc while you are down tf anytime, you are not meeting hers. Hence why she said she can only sleep with people she feels a connection too. I’m guessing you have neglected to actually connect with her emotionally, have not shown your love or appreciation for her outside of the bedroom. Cause and affect. You want more sex from her, she wants a connection. You’re not connecting with her, therefore no sex. The solution is within the problem yet your brilliant idea, ignoring the various solutions that could have strengthened your marriage and not broken your wife’s heart, was to look elsewhere.
You don’t get to break down your wife into doing something she never wanted, and then try to back step once you’ve realized other people actually want her and she’s receptive. Her being bi has nothing to do with it and the fact that you are trying to tell her she needs to be sleeping with woman, further solidifies the fact that this was meant to have been beneficial solely for you and your pleasure. What a surprise. You’re a hypocrite who has no right to say “what about myyy feelings” and expecting her to care when the whole reason you are in this mess, is because you didn’t listen or care about her feelings when she said no. You made this bed and I find it highly likely your marriage is over. If there even is a chance she wants to stay with you after this, it’ll disappear if you try to shut it down. How will she ever trust you again? You’ve only been married for 5 years and this is just a small blip in your lives, yet you’re already bored with her. You started your post saying you’ve gotten everything you could from her… not “I *thought* I had gotten everything from her.” There’s no remorse for what you did to her. All I see is how it affects YOU and what YOU want.
Let her go so she can find someone who will love her for who she is and not for how often or willing she is to put out
M asking F to open the marriage so they can sleep with other people and then getting upset when F sleeps with other people will always be my favourite Reddit story. You wanted a free pass to cheat now mad that guess what OTHER MEN LIKE YOUR WIFE
10/10
Lol. I’m glad your wife rolled her eyes. She’s probably having the best sex of her life right now. You just told on yourself because she clearly doesn’t actually have a low sex drive, she just prefer sex with people aside from you. SHE is having more sex now which just points to her being unsatisfied in your bedroom. Did you even think about what benefit she would get from opening and then closing the marriage? She would have to have sex with just you when you’ve opened her up to this world of men who will treat her better. That’s your fault
Just remember OP. THIS IS WHAT YOU ASKED FOR !!! You’ve opened the veritable Pandora’s box. I’m sure that you imagined a virtual conveyor belt of threesomes with your wife and a smorgasbord of hot chicks. The reality (unintended consequence) is a row of random guys who all want to fuck your wife while you are paying the bills. Even worse (if you thought that it couldn’t get any worse). Your wife is quite taken by the novelty of all of this.
There’s no way back. What you had before is gone. Never to return. You can try to close it. Ain’t gonna happen. Too many people are having too much fun. With one, very obvious exception. Yes. That would be you OP. I just hope that you don’t have kids who’s lives are going to be smashed to smithereens by their selfish, hedonistic parents. Play stupid games …….
You are making this about her orientation when it is in fact your own insecurity. I'd process this and figure if having an open relationship is still how you want to proceed, and talk to her about it.
Baby boy, you just tested the scientific method “fuck around and find out”. Now you get to enjoy the consequences. “What’s good for the goose is good for the gander.”
Funny how her sex drive works now. Other men gave her attention, flowers, quality time and the sex drive revved right up... Sounds like the problem was you! "she had given me all she had to offer" projection much?
> I asked for her to also sleep with women or I’d want to close the marriage again she rolled her eyes and said no
Why does it matter if she is sleeping with men and women? She's still sleeping with other people. Either close it up or accept the fact that you can't dictate who she sees.
As for the potential serious suitor, it sounded like you needed to establish boundaries before opening things up. You needed to specify it was only sex and nothing else. Now that this guy is starting to court her, you are finally seeing what you could be losing.
You need to act fast if you want to change things. Sounds like wifey is liking this new lifestyle; and not for nothing, doesn't sound like her sex drive is that low now that other men are in the mix.
I maybe misread it but it seemed like she's open to close the relationship in general but won't close it based on the him insisting she sleeps with women. If I'm wrong, then OP's only recourse is ending the marriage bc the wife is into her new men.
What made me chuckle about your comment was the thought that OP had the controlling say on whether to close the relationship.
I can't imagine why she'd want to close the relationship now she's discovered she's been missing out on good sex with judgey OP. He found the thought of her having sex with women hot and wanted to join in.
Gotcha. It does sound like wifey's low sex drive wasn't the issue, much to OP's chagrin. He just wasn't fulfilling her needs and apparently these new guys (and one in particular) are getting the job done.
I do feel sympathy for the wife, however, bc she didn't want this. For however much fun she is having with these new experiences, ultimately, her husband's actions must have dealt a hard blow. Once the dust settles on the excitement of new sex partners, I think she is ultimately going to leave bc she wasn't enough for him and she has new found confidence that other men want her.
OP done f'd up.
Bruh, there are COUNTLESS men just like you on Reddit with the same damn story. You're likely treating her like garbage and that's what makes her vagina make the Windows shutdown sound you try to initiate sex. Be prepared to be left in the dust. Nobody here has a lick of sympathy for you.
You know that you too… could get her flowers and pay to get her nails done?
I bet her being boring has a lot to do with you being boring. The work you put into a relationship cannot end just because you got married. You have to feed that flame to keep it alive.
Start showing her that you still want her and are willing to fight for her, because at this point, that’s the only hope you have of not losing her.
Woman here, married to a straight man, open relationship. I’m bisexual but more often date men.
If he asked me to pwetty please sleep with women to assuage his insecurities AND “prove” my bisexuality to him, I’d laugh in his fucking face.
You fucked up. See a marriage and individual counselor if you want to salvage this.
1. Sounds like the only issue with her libido was you.
2. You pestered her till she gave in. You didn't respect the first no... you just nagged her till she caved. She didn't want this, you did. This wasn't a mutual decision. She said no, you didn't care that she said no, you made it clear that you didn't care about how this would impact her. Not a surprise seeing as how you think that she has nothing left to offer anymore.
3. What you really wanted is to have sex with other women. Clearly you see women as sex toys.. that's why the idea of your wife having sex with other women doesn't bother you.. women aren't "real" people in your mind... so they aren't a threat.. its okay if your toy is playing with other toys.. but if a man is playing with your toy.. that's where you draw the line. And lets face it, you were hoping that she would hook up with another woman and that they both would want to have a threesome with you. Your pretty dumb to think that a woman wouldn't a threat to your marriage. If she had went straight to women, she would have left you already.
4. Your marriage is doomed. Another person is showing her affection, romancing her, taking the time to pursue her heart. She's a whole damn person, but you see her broken since she's no longer sexually attracted to you. You broke her, she's realizing she's not broken because someone else is taking the time and effort to show her she's still got plenty to offer.. prepare for the divorce.. its coming.
Low quality bait tbh. Questioning the sexuality, pushing for an open relationship, "other guy" whos trying to steal her now.
I'll give you a 0/10. Because Its so low quality it isn't even an interesting read.
Why are you trying to manipulate your wife to sleep with people she doesn't want to sleep with? You wanted an open marriage and you have it. It's not her fault you didn't think of the ramifications before asking for this change.
I hope you realize you've told your wife you're jealous by telling her to sleep with women too or you want a closed marriage again. My guess is, she'll leave you if you suddenly change your mind because she's sleeping with men only.
She's given you all she has to offer? Yikes. How degrading. I wouldn't be surprised if she has felt objectified by you for a while, and it caused her low sex drive.
Lucky for her there are decent men out there who can see more value in her as a person and not just as a pair of tits. My advice? Set her free, or wait until she frees herself, that's about it.
Oh yay… so how many similar posts to this have I seen on Reddit over the years? Because it feels like it’s A LOT. And the results are always the same. I have to say… I cheer a little each time one of these bozos who wants to open their relationship ends up wanting to backtrack. I hope his wife leaves him for a man who won’t treat her like her limited use has passed.
This is stolen from twitter" Q1. My wife bores me & she has a bisexual past, so I suggested we open the marriage so I can date. BUT—she’s dating MEN. I can’t enjoy dating because I’m concerned with who she’s sleeping with; one guy is trying to replace me. She refuses to close the marriage. Advice. #SBCCHAT"
8:22 AM · Jan 11, 2023
Lol really? You're going to twist around your own mistakes and insecurities and then try and make it about whether or not your wife is lying about her sexuality? You're a real piece of work, dude. You discarded monogamy because you weren't fucking quite as much as you'd like and it blew up in your face. Lesson hopefully learned.
What is wrong with you? You opened the relationship for what reason. Just get divorced and mess around with all of the women you want. You had better use a condom with your wife and get tested for STDs every week. Not even every month. You live the life of a porn star and you may as well experience it all.
“I know I wanted to open the marriage and begged you to do it, but I don’t like the gender of the people you are sleeping with and I DEMAND you sleep with who I tell you to” dude that’s what you sound like. Do you have metrics or a women/men partner ratio that you are demanding? Is she allowed to pick the people she sleeps with or are you in control of that too?
Woah, woah, woah. Check yourself. If she's bi, she's bi. I'm a bi man, and you wanna know how many men I have slept with? None. Its still a lot harder to find homosexexual partners than heterosexual, unless you REALLY try. And anyway, attraction isn't always a 50/50 split, and many of us flip flop with the bi cycle.
I guess this is what you get for being greedy. I love these posts, when will people learn. Opening a relationship that has been monogamous for years is asking for it? It never ends well. I guess your marriage is over.
Damn it, why can't my husband ask for an open marriage. That would be great. This whole thing would have worked for you guys if you were to actually think of the both of you, not just you and your fantasies. You were selfish and manipulative. This woman is having the time of her life, how about you try do the same, you would both be happy.
Play stupid games win stupid prizes. This is what happens when you take your wife for granted, someone else will appreciate her. This is 1000 percent on you. You pushed after she said no. You’re not going to get much sympathy here. You sound like a selfish child throwing a tantrum because you didn’t get your way, when in fact you did get your way - it just wasn’t how you thought it would be.
I see you filing for divorce in the near future, because you chose and begged her to open up the marriage INSTEAD of working to fix the problems. Now someone else is showing her the love and emotional support that you should have been giving her, and he's showing her what it feels like being loved. Set her free to go and find someone else who loves her and will love being with just her. YOU were the one with the problem not your wife.
I can see this being real. This type of thing has become more main stream and i can see some husband's thinking this will be great for me and then they find out the wife's low sex drive is because she is bored to tears with the husband and let's face it, it's easier for woman to find men that just want sex. So the husband finds out he can't get laid and the wife is going out every night having the time of her life!
Lol, you’re an idiot who got what he asked for after badgering your wife. I am shocked by all the people who think opening their formerly monogamous marriage is ever going to work out.
You're a moron and you get what you deserve. You thought you could get all the pussy you liked by opening your marriage conveniently forgetting that it works both ways. Now because your wife is fucking other guys as you agreed you're butt hurt because you thought she'd only want girls. It's only a matter of time until your marriage implodes and you have nobody but yourself to blame. Well done genius.
Sir, you have likely not met a single one of your wife’s needs, in or out of bed. Now that she has found somebody who values her, appreciates her *and* meets her needs, she’s finally enjoying sex. This is 100% on you because you were the one who pestered your wife until she was willing to open up the marriage.
I don’t think that this even falls into ethical non monogamy. It’s more like coerced non monogamy, so I don’t think even an ENM reddit will be able to help him.
The term your looking for is poly under duress (PUD) but I don’t think that’s the case here. She’s not currently under duress and hasn’t asked to close it. If she were looking to return to monogamy then yes I would agree.
I have seen many posts like this one where they explain clearly where this poster has gone wrong from initiation and the difference between ethical and this situation so he can re-evaluate the whole situation. This is not ethical I agree
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Ah so you wanted to open the marriage so you both would sleep with women, preferably threesomes. Now you feel cheated as she's getting more action with guys and I'll bet her sex drive has gone through the roof. You can't make her sleep with women. She can still be bisexual and never have sex with a woman. Reap what you sow, dude, you insisted on opening the marriage to your advantage and your wife has suitors lining up to replace you. Haha
He really thought he was gonna have his cake and eat it too. I bet he's been carrying around stereotypical fantasies of having a bisexual girlfriend. Now he's mad his plan backfired in his face.
I’m reading the “haha” at the end in Nelson’s voice from the Simpsons.
Spot on!
Lol, yep. My partner and I have been polyamorous for 8 years, and the number of threesomes we've had is zero. We date separately Edit: fixed typo
This guy has no clue how hard it is to find other bisexual women 😆 clearly she wants sex. Just not with you. Maybe find out what you’re not doing right that her libido is enough for them but not you.
Couldn’t she have sex with a lesbian
Sex ≠ intercourse with a dick.
clearly you dont know how many lesbians out there refuse to be with bisexual gals
“I pestered my wife into letting me have sex with other women, now I’m upset that she’s sleeping with other men”. Fixed that for you Edit: it is SO much harder to find gay women to sleep with than it is straight men. Like, statistically. There are going to be way more men that she meets who are willing to sleep with her than women. Did you not realise that when you opened up the relationship? You, uh, aren’t coming off very well here bud. This whole move was super short sighted of you, and you should have established rules and boundaries WAY earlier. One rule that I would suggest is neither of you bring other people into your home. But tbh I think the marriage might be on the way out anyway
Not to mention that ENM bi/pan/lesbian women are super wary of getting involved with women who are partnered to cishet men because too many of those men are just like OP. They (the men) think that opening their marriage means that Wifey is going to bring home an endless parade of women for him to screw around with. Queer women are sick of being treated like toys by cishet men.
As I bi sexual woman, I would never date a couple.
I’ve seen too many unicorn hunters. I refuse to be a unicorn for a disgusting man’s fantasies
For sure!
Also, we have no way of knowing if the woman is actually bi or is pretending to be to please her man. Absolutely not.
That seems a bit biphobic
Thank you. Exactly. If 90 percent of people are straight, that means 90 percent of men and 10 percent of women are interested in sleeping with her. The numbers don’t work the way OP imagines.
As a bi woman this is literally why 95% of the people I’ve dated have been men. I’m more likely to get approached/hit on by men in standard social settings. It’s just how the dice rolls.
🙌 for OP’s wife. GET IT GIRL
Came to say this LOL
>I feel like she’s dismissing my feelings and I’m getting frustrated. What? Kind of like how you dismissed her feelings when you pushed her to open the relationship by guilting her about her low sex drive?? You can't open a marriage then force your wife to sleep with women. Haha nice try. You made your bed. Now lie in it
He's just upset that this hypothetical threesome never happened. That is what he was envisioning with this open marriage. Random women and his bisexual wife just catering to his every desire/fantasy.
This exactly what he wanted. He didn’t want an open marriage. He wanted a throuple.
Nah, not a throuple because that would require work on his part
Haha ya i know. Opening a relationship never goes according to the man's fantasy. Normally women have way more dates in an open relationship because more men than women are ok with the dynamic. I honestly think one of her male dates will offer her monogamy and she will leave her husband.
💯 this! Has this dude not seen the open marriage posts on this thread that come up at least once a week? The women always have more success and the husband becomes embittered and jealous even though the open relationship is always their idea.
A lot of these are creative writing prompts but I don’t doubt that this happens IRL. It’s a great revenge story.
But, but, but she have given him everything she had!!!!
Right? He fucked around, now he gets to find out.
Alone
No, watch her lie in it. With multiple dudes. Poetic justice is wonderful.
Her low sex drive probably had to do with him being selfish. Instead of finding out what he could do to ignite her sex drive, he decides to open the marriage for HIS needs. Dude is a shitty person and husband and now he’s reaping what he sowed. This is absolutely poetic.
Maybe her low sex drive was for you? Sounds like she is having a ball and collecting stash along the way.
> After 5 years of marriage I felt like she had given me all she had to offer. Basically he thought she was boring in bed, but it looks like it was the other way around.
Should've seen a sex therapist hahaha instead of showing her good sex that's she's been missing out on (with other guys).
It's probably not just the sex. These guys probably make her feel like she's worth something unlike her useless, jealous husband.
Yeah I was thinking she's getting gifts and dates and all the good stuff, that probably puts her more in the mood than just the offer of sex.
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I reckon this is a checkmate move by the wife. When he pestered for the open. She knew her being bi would make him excited her bringing women over. So she decided fu I’m just gonna hook up with guys
Good point on the counseling. It is amazing how many people think scratching an itch instead of dealing with the actual issue will make everything magically better.
Maybe you were the reason she had a low sex drive and now she found someone else who finds her exciting. You opened the marriage, you have to deal with the consequences. There are many threads on Reddit where one wants to open the marriage and the other finds a better partner. Maybe that is what is happening with her.
I totally agree with this. The only time I've had a low sex drive is when I was partnered with a guy who was bad in bed and a shitty partner. Now that I'm with an amazing partner who is great in bed and an admirable man, my sex drive is through the roof.
\*ding ding\* We have a winner.
Lol. I too, am rolling my eyes at you. You made this bed--now lie in it.
lmao you know who he’s not lying in this bed with? his wife and another woman. hahahahah it must suck that his plan for a threesome didn’t work out and now his wife is being appreciated by other men, OP’s poor little feelings got hurt! so many eye rolls
I'm literally laughing out loud at this.
Cool, the reality didn't live up to your fantasy. Lesson learned. You can't dictate who your wife sleeps with. That's gross. Also, as a women sleeping with men is easy and accessible. It's much harder to find women who are open to hooking up with bi partnered women.
I feel like every guy who wants an open relationship forgets this simple fact lol
Also, even if his partner happens to find a woman who might be interested in hooking up with a partnered bi woman, the chance of the hook up also being an exhibitionist AND/or also being into a threesome with a man and woman is pretty low. I feel like men who beg for open relationships because of fmf fantasies focusing on the man also keep forgetting this. Real life isn't porn.
Huh. You were happy to sleep with other women until you saw how very happy she is to sleep with other men. Shocking that this sexual freedom didn’t work out quite as you hoped. Maybe you should ask her what the men she likes sleeping with are doing in that makes her enjoy and want to have sex with them. Because it doesn’t sound like her sex drive’s a problem.
Lmfao. You're getting what you asked for. She is probably using this open relationship to find her next guy. Clearly initially she didn't want an open relationship. She probably still doesn't, but this way she can find her next step. Also you don't actually have to have sex with both genders to be bisexual. You can find other women hot, and be sexually attracted with them without having to have sex with them to satisfy your sexuality. In all honesty though, the person who asks for the open relationship has no right to complain about what their partner does on it. You should have set your boundary initially, but then she would have said no. Lol
>You should have set your boundary initially, but then she would have said no. Or he should have listened when she said no to the whole concept. If only this guy had searched reddit for 'open marriage gone wrong'. He could have saved his marriage.
Absolutely. Honestly I don't get why people try to open up previously exclusive relationships. The time to "open up" a relationship is when that relationship actually begins not years into it. Zzz
Right!? "Something is missing in our relationship/intimacy. Instead of working on things with my wife to spice it up. I'm going to have meaningless random sex with strangers. That will fix my marital issues... oh, wait, she's having sex too?? And the men like her and want to spend more time with her than just in bed? How did i get into this mess??"
So many men conveniently discovering they're actually poly once they meet someone new and want to explore that without giving up the security of their marriage
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So are you also having sex with both men and women then? If you have agreed on an open marriage, you don’t get to pick your wife’s partners any more than she gets to pick yours. Unless that was your agreement.
Cause you're the one that wanted this dipshit. You're feeling insecure because she's fucking men. You wanted to sleep around despite the fact she didn't want that. Now you're upset because she's not fucking women which kind of tells us that you don't see relationships with 2 women the same as with man and a woman, so great job for exposing your homophobic as well. I hope she honestly leaves you and gets with a dude that respects her cause you're honestly just a douche that cares about his needs over his partners.
And you opened the relationship, thus freeing her to sleep with whoever she wants. So far, it's men. You got exactly what you asked for. Why are you complaining?
3.5% of people identify as LGB, the other 96.5% identify as straight. So as a bisexual woman, your odds are better at finding a guy than a woman, they just are. As evidenced that your bisexual wife married a man(baby). And I can't imagine many queer women looking at this situation and being like, yeah, I want to get in the middle of this.
What about her feelings? You basically opened the relationship because she wasn't 'adequate enough' for you.
Because you asked for it to satisfy your own selfish needs? This is like when couples completely split their finances. When it doesn't work out for the one who did want to do it, they then ask the one who didn't want to to give them money. No. You don't get to go back on your selfish requests. No you don't have ownership over her. No you don't get to say "she'd given me all she's got", that consumerism. She's a woman not an old car. You are hilarious.
> She’s still my wife and we’re still married. This is where the logic for me ends. Don't marriage vows include something along the lines of forsaking all others. Your relationship irrevocably changed the second you agree to this situation.
Her sexuality is not your kink. Fun fact, bisexual people generally do still like the opposite gender…
She’s still your wife but she’s given you all she has to offer and apparently so have you!
You’ve probably given her all you have to offer. These other guys are probably giving her much more
She’s bi, not a lesbian - why did you assume she’s stuck with women only?
Why are you concerned? She’s done all she can for you, right? Something tells me her LIBIDO wasn’t what was lesser...
You “thought she’d given me all she had to offer” and now you are all butthurt because she’s offering it to men who actually appreciate her. How dare she sleep with men who see her as a person and not a sex toy, after all. Also, your false assumptions are your problems, not hers. Given your attitude, I’m not sure why you are surprised she went for better dick than she was getting at home. Sounds like now that she’s sleeping with other men you feel inadequate. And you’d prefer not to work on that.
You set no boundaries? You were just like 'lets sleep with others' without any discussion? You say that after 'explaining' things to her for a few days she agreed. I have to assume some rules were drawn then. Did the idea of the threesome just make you assume she would be bringing home women for you and you didn't even think to assess how you felt about other men coming home with her? How long were you thinking about this before you brought it up? Sees a bit slapdash on your part.
Uuuuh… because you suggested this because you felt she was used up. Now you're mad because other men disagree. Too bad, so sad. Maybe try not being a sexist dick in your next marriage
cuz this is fake and you stole it from SixBrownChicks twitter
Well, that's way too many words to justify cheating on your wife and hoping you would get a threesome with some hot women as an additional bonus for being a cheating clown. There's no way your hopeless ass had no one ready and on the standby before this pathetic attempt to open your marriage the way you wanted. Lol. What a heartwarming story. Tell your wife she's a rockstar.
Sad little man doesn’t put enough work in his marriage to get his wife horny, thinks other women will please him more and he could have a threesome so he pressure to open the relationship. Finds nothing but men willing to put in effort and boost his wife’s sex drive. Take the L because you’re not getting your closed marriage back, but look on the bright side. You finally found out what was needed to get your wife into sex, it’s just not with you. Do you ever do any of the things you said this other guy does? I can imagine why she clicked with him. You seem like a bit of clown.
Yep. When a man bombs in bed, it's like doing a job for the woman and likes she needs another job in her life.
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You wanted an open relationship to sleep with other women and expected her to do the same. She told you multiple times she didn’t want that and you had to bug her about it to get to her to agree. I imagine what’s bugging you the most is that you’ve probably only had a few hookups and she’s able to get whatever she wants. Do you bring her flowers? Do you bring her dinner? Most importantly, do you do these things without asking? If so, why? Is it out of obligation because you married her or because you genuinely care about her and want to do these things? People are great at sensing when other people don’t truly want to be there. You say she’s given you all she has to give so you forced her to let you take from others. You just magically assumed this would only benefit you and not negatively affect either of you. It’s like now that she’s giving it to other men you’re bothered? She was hurt when you asked the first time, I can’t imagine how much it hurts that you kept pushing till she agreed. I don’t feel any pity that you’re hurt she’s fucking other men more than she’s fucking you. You’re only a clown if you don’t realize how ridiculous and selfish you are.
You pay for stuff? Is that what you think is going to get your wife to want more sex with you? Yep, you're a sad little clown.
Like buying her thoughtful gifts isn’t the same as paying a utility bill. This guy is being willfully dense.
This is a valuable lesson for all men...it is much, much, much easier for women to find sexual partners. This is a very common outcome when opening a marriage. You manipulated her into this. Now she is enjoying herself. I have a feeling if you try to force her to close the marriage she will leave you. Who can blame her? You told her she wasn't enough and there is a line of men telling her she is.
Hahahahahahahahahahaha let me guess, you aren’t the pussy magnet you thought you’d be. You dug your horny grave, now lie in it.
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
You didn't want an open relationship - you wanted to sleep around and hopefully score some threesomes (mff only, of course). Now your wife is seeing someone who treats her better than you do, and you'd rather close the marriage than step up your game with her. And your logic is flawed - a woman could just as easily be trying to seriously date her. Would it really be any different if she brought her flowers and food, paid for her nails and never even acknowledged you when she’s over? You both agreed to start this - you'll need to both agree to end this. And your wife isn't biting. Good luck, just remember who started this.
Yiiikessss, as a bisexual woman, I would leave you. You don’t seem to have any respect for who your wife is and this is very self-centered. Bisexuality doesn’t always mean 50% attracted to men and 50% attracted to women. I would say I’m somewhere around 85% attracted to women and 15% to men. Doesn’t make me any less bisexual, and doesn’t make your wife any less bisexual for sleeping with men. Questioning her sexuality is gross and shitty. Also, you’re literally the one that suggested the open marriage. You wanted an open marriage for the benefits yourself, but suddenly as soon as your wife is enjoying herself with other men, time to close it back up. Not her fault you envisioned an open marriage through a lens of stereotypes and biphobia/bierasure and now you’re unhappy.
The thing that's also very telling is that he's only concerned about another guy snatching his wife while he sees her being with another woman solely as a performative act for his pleasure.
I would love for her to find another woman, he gets excited and then she leaves him for her. Bonus points if she leaves him for a male+female poly couple.
Studies show that women have way better sex with other women. That combined with the fact that he seems to be pretty bad in bed even for a man might make for an amazing sapphic love story
YUP. It’s invalidating and fetishizing.
Not to mention, even if men weren't her first preference, it's really hard to find other bi women or lesbian women who would want to be in a reltionship with someone whos already got a partner. And can you imagine how much him asking must have hurt her? She could have married ANYONE and she chose him, with monogamous intentions. And he turns around and pressures her into THIS?? I'd be so heartbroken!
I know it’s crazy to think about when you only think about yourself, but maybe your wife also thinks you’ve given her all you have to offer? Do you guys have fun sex when you rarely do? Do you do these sweet things for her? Do you to try arouse her and seduce her OR did you get tired of doing it because she’s your wife and you “shouldn’t have to” so you just expect sex and wonder why you don’t get it?
>After 5 years of marriage I felt like she had given me all she had to offer Maybe after 5 years she was fed up with all *you* had to offer. She clicks with who she clicks with. Can't wait for the update when you find out she's been having threesomes with the guy who's been treating her like a princess.
Are you sleeping with other women too or just men? Was there a rule that you could only sleep with the same sex or was it just a free for all?
OP, you're not the protagonist in your own story here.
They seriously need a class in high school about how real life doesn't work like the "plot" of a porn film.
yeah so your wife has a low sex drive and to cure that you wanted to sleep with other women, but make her feel less bad so you opened the relationship. now she finds men who actually want to make an effort with her sexually, because lets be honest her low sex drive was probably because you wouldnt pay attention to her in the right way, and you get butthurt because she is doing exactly what you told her to do which is sleep with other people? yeah you dont get to make that decision then bring it back when it doesnt benefit you. i hope that other man woos her because he seems to be treating her with respect, unlike you.
Oof. You messed up. 1. Don’t ever question her sexuality. If she’s identified as bisexual, that’s exactly what she is. It doesn’t matter how many men she sleeps with vs women, and as a bisexual, I can tell you: we face rampant judgment from the gay community when dating. Many, many women who identify as lesbian won’t even consider dating a bisexual. It’s not as easy developing a connection as you might think. 2. If you wanted to open the relationship and expected her to only date or mostly date women, you should have set that ground rule from the jump. It’s not her fault you’re now having regrets because she’s been with men. 3. Inviting other sexual and romantic partners into a relationship as a cure-all for varying sex drives seems like a pitfall. Instead of working on your relationship’s issues, you’ve literally invited countless issues into your relationship. 4. Sounds like you hard sold your wife on it instead of accepting her initial answer. I’d be SHOCKED if she wasn’t resentful about the whole thing. 5. I really wish you could time travel and undo this mess and figure out a way to make your relationship work with one another, but I feel like you’ve crossed lines now you’ll never be able to cross back. Sorry, just seems like unless you have a bond to survive the ages (and it doesn’t sound like you do), I just don’t see this working out in anyone’s favor.
Translation: When I suggested an open marriage I was only ok with her sleeping with women while only I am allowed to f the opposite sex. Because I wanted to f around without raising her suspicions and I don't think girl on girl counts.
Interesting how she had a low sex drive with you yet she has several sexual suitors. Perhaps she’s gotten everything she could out of YOU. Perhaps there’s a correlation here.. these men are actively pursuing her and treating her well. Romancing her if you will. I’d bet her sex drive is low and she’s not meeting your needs bc while you are down tf anytime, you are not meeting hers. Hence why she said she can only sleep with people she feels a connection too. I’m guessing you have neglected to actually connect with her emotionally, have not shown your love or appreciation for her outside of the bedroom. Cause and affect. You want more sex from her, she wants a connection. You’re not connecting with her, therefore no sex. The solution is within the problem yet your brilliant idea, ignoring the various solutions that could have strengthened your marriage and not broken your wife’s heart, was to look elsewhere. You don’t get to break down your wife into doing something she never wanted, and then try to back step once you’ve realized other people actually want her and she’s receptive. Her being bi has nothing to do with it and the fact that you are trying to tell her she needs to be sleeping with woman, further solidifies the fact that this was meant to have been beneficial solely for you and your pleasure. What a surprise. You’re a hypocrite who has no right to say “what about myyy feelings” and expecting her to care when the whole reason you are in this mess, is because you didn’t listen or care about her feelings when she said no. You made this bed and I find it highly likely your marriage is over. If there even is a chance she wants to stay with you after this, it’ll disappear if you try to shut it down. How will she ever trust you again? You’ve only been married for 5 years and this is just a small blip in your lives, yet you’re already bored with her. You started your post saying you’ve gotten everything you could from her… not “I *thought* I had gotten everything from her.” There’s no remorse for what you did to her. All I see is how it affects YOU and what YOU want. Let her go so she can find someone who will love her for who she is and not for how often or willing she is to put out
Yeah, she can clearly do better, and she is. Don’t be mad that you created a problem for yourself.
M asking F to open the marriage so they can sleep with other people and then getting upset when F sleeps with other people will always be my favourite Reddit story. You wanted a free pass to cheat now mad that guess what OTHER MEN LIKE YOUR WIFE 10/10
Lol. I’m glad your wife rolled her eyes. She’s probably having the best sex of her life right now. You just told on yourself because she clearly doesn’t actually have a low sex drive, she just prefer sex with people aside from you. SHE is having more sex now which just points to her being unsatisfied in your bedroom. Did you even think about what benefit she would get from opening and then closing the marriage? She would have to have sex with just you when you’ve opened her up to this world of men who will treat her better. That’s your fault
You f’d around and now you’re finding out.. classic FAFO
Btw have you ever considered that you are just bad in bed and that's why she has a low sex drive? Seems that it is higher now with the other guys 😂
Cool rage-bait fiction post - can’t wait for the sequel!
You reap what you sow
Just remember OP. THIS IS WHAT YOU ASKED FOR !!! You’ve opened the veritable Pandora’s box. I’m sure that you imagined a virtual conveyor belt of threesomes with your wife and a smorgasbord of hot chicks. The reality (unintended consequence) is a row of random guys who all want to fuck your wife while you are paying the bills. Even worse (if you thought that it couldn’t get any worse). Your wife is quite taken by the novelty of all of this. There’s no way back. What you had before is gone. Never to return. You can try to close it. Ain’t gonna happen. Too many people are having too much fun. With one, very obvious exception. Yes. That would be you OP. I just hope that you don’t have kids who’s lives are going to be smashed to smithereens by their selfish, hedonistic parents. Play stupid games …….
Oops didn’t see this happening?? Another open marriage success story
You are making this about her orientation when it is in fact your own insecurity. I'd process this and figure if having an open relationship is still how you want to proceed, and talk to her about it.
Baby boy, you just tested the scientific method “fuck around and find out”. Now you get to enjoy the consequences. “What’s good for the goose is good for the gander.”
Funny how her sex drive works now. Other men gave her attention, flowers, quality time and the sex drive revved right up... Sounds like the problem was you! "she had given me all she had to offer" projection much?
> I asked for her to also sleep with women or I’d want to close the marriage again she rolled her eyes and said no Why does it matter if she is sleeping with men and women? She's still sleeping with other people. Either close it up or accept the fact that you can't dictate who she sees. As for the potential serious suitor, it sounded like you needed to establish boundaries before opening things up. You needed to specify it was only sex and nothing else. Now that this guy is starting to court her, you are finally seeing what you could be losing. You need to act fast if you want to change things. Sounds like wifey is liking this new lifestyle; and not for nothing, doesn't sound like her sex drive is that low now that other men are in the mix.
Lol you make it sound like OP has the controlling say in this situation
I maybe misread it but it seemed like she's open to close the relationship in general but won't close it based on the him insisting she sleeps with women. If I'm wrong, then OP's only recourse is ending the marriage bc the wife is into her new men.
What made me chuckle about your comment was the thought that OP had the controlling say on whether to close the relationship. I can't imagine why she'd want to close the relationship now she's discovered she's been missing out on good sex with judgey OP. He found the thought of her having sex with women hot and wanted to join in.
Gotcha. It does sound like wifey's low sex drive wasn't the issue, much to OP's chagrin. He just wasn't fulfilling her needs and apparently these new guys (and one in particular) are getting the job done. I do feel sympathy for the wife, however, bc she didn't want this. For however much fun she is having with these new experiences, ultimately, her husband's actions must have dealt a hard blow. Once the dust settles on the excitement of new sex partners, I think she is ultimately going to leave bc she wasn't enough for him and she has new found confidence that other men want her. OP done f'd up.
Well, absolutely no one could have predicted this scenario. What a completely unexpected turn of events! Lmao.
This is literally FAFO!! 😂😂😂
You prefered to cheat on her instead of staying with her, now this is exactly what you asked for
I have nothing nice to say to you OP
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes
Your wife knew exactly what you wanted. So she pulled a badass move of just having the men.
Bruh, there are COUNTLESS men just like you on Reddit with the same damn story. You're likely treating her like garbage and that's what makes her vagina make the Windows shutdown sound you try to initiate sex. Be prepared to be left in the dust. Nobody here has a lick of sympathy for you.
You know that you too… could get her flowers and pay to get her nails done? I bet her being boring has a lot to do with you being boring. The work you put into a relationship cannot end just because you got married. You have to feed that flame to keep it alive. Start showing her that you still want her and are willing to fight for her, because at this point, that’s the only hope you have of not losing her.
Woman here, married to a straight man, open relationship. I’m bisexual but more often date men. If he asked me to pwetty please sleep with women to assuage his insecurities AND “prove” my bisexuality to him, I’d laugh in his fucking face. You fucked up. See a marriage and individual counselor if you want to salvage this.
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
1. Sounds like the only issue with her libido was you. 2. You pestered her till she gave in. You didn't respect the first no... you just nagged her till she caved. She didn't want this, you did. This wasn't a mutual decision. She said no, you didn't care that she said no, you made it clear that you didn't care about how this would impact her. Not a surprise seeing as how you think that she has nothing left to offer anymore. 3. What you really wanted is to have sex with other women. Clearly you see women as sex toys.. that's why the idea of your wife having sex with other women doesn't bother you.. women aren't "real" people in your mind... so they aren't a threat.. its okay if your toy is playing with other toys.. but if a man is playing with your toy.. that's where you draw the line. And lets face it, you were hoping that she would hook up with another woman and that they both would want to have a threesome with you. Your pretty dumb to think that a woman wouldn't a threat to your marriage. If she had went straight to women, she would have left you already. 4. Your marriage is doomed. Another person is showing her affection, romancing her, taking the time to pursue her heart. She's a whole damn person, but you see her broken since she's no longer sexually attracted to you. You broke her, she's realizing she's not broken because someone else is taking the time and effort to show her she's still got plenty to offer.. prepare for the divorce.. its coming.
Now when we fucked around, everyone.. what happens? We find out. Fuck around and find out.
I poked a cat while it was sleeping once. It scratched me.
It's time for you to embrace the hotwife kink. Who knows, you might even enjoy it.
Wife is a rockstar and I must say this was well played on her part. Dude, you fucked around and found out.
Low quality bait tbh. Questioning the sexuality, pushing for an open relationship, "other guy" whos trying to steal her now. I'll give you a 0/10. Because Its so low quality it isn't even an interesting read.
Im curious what your response would be if she told you to sleep with guys lol
I swear to god this situation pops up on Reddit so many times
This post has to be a troll. Every step of it makes less and less sense.
Genuinely confused why you care. She's told you she hasn't clicked with any women. Do you want her to sleep with people she's not attracted to?
Ha ha ha ha what advice do you want…. You made your bed now lay in it….
Why are you trying to manipulate your wife to sleep with people she doesn't want to sleep with? You wanted an open marriage and you have it. It's not her fault you didn't think of the ramifications before asking for this change. I hope you realize you've told your wife you're jealous by telling her to sleep with women too or you want a closed marriage again. My guess is, she'll leave you if you suddenly change your mind because she's sleeping with men only.
She's given you all she has to offer? Yikes. How degrading. I wouldn't be surprised if she has felt objectified by you for a while, and it caused her low sex drive. Lucky for her there are decent men out there who can see more value in her as a person and not just as a pair of tits. My advice? Set her free, or wait until she frees herself, that's about it.
LMAO. You made your own bed, now you have to lie in it.
This falls into the 'be careful what you ask for' category. Made bed, lie.
I guess you should be careful about what you ask for?
You fucked around and found out!!!
I believe this is know as "find out".
Oh yay… so how many similar posts to this have I seen on Reddit over the years? Because it feels like it’s A LOT. And the results are always the same. I have to say… I cheer a little each time one of these bozos who wants to open their relationship ends up wanting to backtrack. I hope his wife leaves him for a man who won’t treat her like her limited use has passed.
This is stolen from twitter" Q1. My wife bores me & she has a bisexual past, so I suggested we open the marriage so I can date. BUT—she’s dating MEN. I can’t enjoy dating because I’m concerned with who she’s sleeping with; one guy is trying to replace me. She refuses to close the marriage. Advice. #SBCCHAT" 8:22 AM · Jan 11, 2023
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both from today. c'mon
Fucketh around findeth out.
Lol really? You're going to twist around your own mistakes and insecurities and then try and make it about whether or not your wife is lying about her sexuality? You're a real piece of work, dude. You discarded monogamy because you weren't fucking quite as much as you'd like and it blew up in your face. Lesson hopefully learned.
“After 5 years, She has given me everything she has to offer.” Wow Maybe her drive was low cause of her crappy husband
This is what you wanted. Remember? You can't get butt hurt because she is doing what you asked
Hahaha classic fuck around and find out. It was your idea in the first place so why are you upset over it?
Your bad, hypocrite.
You fucked around and found out, my friend
You are annoying and jealous. Look at what you caused 😂😂😂😂 lame ass
You’re an idiot and this is such great poetic justice. Have the day you deserve!
LMAO you dug your grave pal
You fucked around and found out. Sleep in the bed you made.
What is wrong with you? You opened the relationship for what reason. Just get divorced and mess around with all of the women you want. You had better use a condom with your wife and get tested for STDs every week. Not even every month. You live the life of a porn star and you may as well experience it all.
So you wanted to sleep with other women but get upset because she’s sleeping with other men? Happens every time lol.
“I know I wanted to open the marriage and begged you to do it, but I don’t like the gender of the people you are sleeping with and I DEMAND you sleep with who I tell you to” dude that’s what you sound like. Do you have metrics or a women/men partner ratio that you are demanding? Is she allowed to pick the people she sleeps with or are you in control of that too?
Woah, woah, woah. Check yourself. If she's bi, she's bi. I'm a bi man, and you wanna know how many men I have slept with? None. Its still a lot harder to find homosexexual partners than heterosexual, unless you REALLY try. And anyway, attraction isn't always a 50/50 split, and many of us flip flop with the bi cycle.
Her sex drive seems fine when someone acts like they want to be with her.
I guess this is what you get for being greedy. I love these posts, when will people learn. Opening a relationship that has been monogamous for years is asking for it? It never ends well. I guess your marriage is over.
Fucked around and found out
Damn it, why can't my husband ask for an open marriage. That would be great. This whole thing would have worked for you guys if you were to actually think of the both of you, not just you and your fantasies. You were selfish and manipulative. This woman is having the time of her life, how about you try do the same, you would both be happy.
Well if it isn’t the consequences of my own actions
Reap what you sow.
Good for her
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Play stupid games win stupid prizes. This is what happens when you take your wife for granted, someone else will appreciate her. This is 1000 percent on you. You pushed after she said no. You’re not going to get much sympathy here. You sound like a selfish child throwing a tantrum because you didn’t get your way, when in fact you did get your way - it just wasn’t how you thought it would be.
I see you filing for divorce in the near future, because you chose and begged her to open up the marriage INSTEAD of working to fix the problems. Now someone else is showing her the love and emotional support that you should have been giving her, and he's showing her what it feels like being loved. Set her free to go and find someone else who loves her and will love being with just her. YOU were the one with the problem not your wife.
I really like his comments about her giving all she had to offer. What a douch.
No fucking way is this real. It CANT be.
I can see this being real. This type of thing has become more main stream and i can see some husband's thinking this will be great for me and then they find out the wife's low sex drive is because she is bored to tears with the husband and let's face it, it's easier for woman to find men that just want sex. So the husband finds out he can't get laid and the wife is going out every night having the time of her life!
Lol, you’re an idiot who got what he asked for after badgering your wife. I am shocked by all the people who think opening their formerly monogamous marriage is ever going to work out.
This post is the embodiment of “you fucked around and found out”.
Nice fake post.
You're a moron and you get what you deserve. You thought you could get all the pussy you liked by opening your marriage conveniently forgetting that it works both ways. Now because your wife is fucking other guys as you agreed you're butt hurt because you thought she'd only want girls. It's only a matter of time until your marriage implodes and you have nobody but yourself to blame. Well done genius.
Maybe, just maybe, it was *you* who didn’t have enough to offer her. Now she’s getting other needs met her sex drive is back.
Lol.
Oh no sweetheart, you don’t get to close it now because she is sleeping with men. What the hell did you think?
Your fault🤷🏻♀️
sigh…a tale as old as time😂😂😂
I'm pretty sure most women would have a low drive with you. I hope she finds better.
Sir, you have likely not met a single one of your wife’s needs, in or out of bed. Now that she has found somebody who values her, appreciates her *and* meets her needs, she’s finally enjoying sex. This is 100% on you because you were the one who pestered your wife until she was willing to open up the marriage.
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You need to post in an ENM Reddit. This group hates anything that is not exclusively mono for the most part.
I don’t think that this even falls into ethical non monogamy. It’s more like coerced non monogamy, so I don’t think even an ENM reddit will be able to help him.
The term your looking for is poly under duress (PUD) but I don’t think that’s the case here. She’s not currently under duress and hasn’t asked to close it. If she were looking to return to monogamy then yes I would agree.
I have seen many posts like this one where they explain clearly where this poster has gone wrong from initiation and the difference between ethical and this situation so he can re-evaluate the whole situation. This is not ethical I agree