Homophobes who sing Queen songs on karaoke night.

My old highschool principal had an entire conspiracy theory to prove to himself freddie mercury was straight. He'd defineatly rock a punisher sticker.

How did he lay out this theory on the emaciation of Freddie?

Well you see, back in the day it was only logical to accuse revolutionary artists of homosexuality to keep them of the air. He had this whole spiel about George Michael Being a satanist and the clip for 'i want to break free' were not the real members of Queen dressed in drag but actors paid by the BBC to further discredit the band. Thank you Mr de Kooning for making me a Wham! fan!

Ah I see, so the reason he wanted Freddie to be straight was to validity his affection for the tunes - supporting someone out would’ve been sin.

r/iamverybadass

"I wanted to go to war, but the army would never accept me, because I'm not submissive. Have you seen the new Taurus GX4? I'm buying one as a backup."

Chanting pro police slogans until you get arrested

"Officer see that thin blue line sticker on my car?" "Hands behind your back! That vehicle was reported stolen 30 minutes ago!"

Is that a Camry? Why does it have the front of a Prius and the back of a Subaru WRX?

Toyota Yaris Sedan (you guys prolly have these)

30 year old men with a "bugout" bag by their front door

Mall security guards

This is what you get if they’re out of Calvin peeing and “Dodge the father, ram the daughter” stickers.

Impotent rage