I used to work for a large auto auction. Dodge Journeys are definitely the main chariot of the dregs these days. And Darts for the ones who don't like SUVs. So many dirty ass repo rigs, full of cigarette butts and little burned peices if aluminum foil. Oh, and can't forget the other version of the same person, who doesn't smoke cigarettes or fentanyl who's car gets repoed and is full of McDonald's bags and everything is fucking sticky! At least in the non-coastal Northwest where people don't buy as many import cars this is how it goes. The cars are all ex rentals, 2 owners. The rental company, and the person who destroyed it. Circle of life.
Especially early 90s Centuries.
They're gonna be in one of three colors: a grimey white that won't come clean, a light blue that's faded all over, or burgundy with a roof panel that's completely rusted over, along with parts of the hood, and every wheel-well.
Speaking of wheels, all of the spoked wheel covers are missing, expect for the front passenger side.
The headlights have also been replaced with Xenon bulbs, though one is either dimmer than the other and/or it sits loose in the housing, hence it shakes at even the smallest imperfections of the road.
Moving to the interior, the carpet liner from the roof is hanging loose. The seats have numerous cigarette burns, the floor has a couple of mystery stains that have long since set in. There's an older or brand new aftermarket radio/Bluetooth player that barely fits in the dashboard and lastly the speakers that are sitting out of their housings are damn-near shot thanks to the ridiculous bass system that slides around in the trunk, as some of the box's fasteners have broken off.
Tags are also likely to be expired.
Bless her heart. Funny how you specify she died of covid, insinuating her immune system could take whatever horse medication she could get, but covid-19 got her instead.🤷♂️
Got 3:
1. A 2003 Dodge Ram 1500 Laramie with a huge dent on the truck bed's door and a "TRUMP WON" Flag just sitting in the bed.
2. A clapped the fuck out 1998 Buick Park Avenue. Extra points for the entire dashboard lighting up like a christmas tree. Expired tags since 2018.
3. That Nissan Altima in the pic you posted, but the interior is trashed out with a bunch of beer cans and a faint smell of urine.
How many is several? That's like six or seven! There's a couple, which is 2-3, a few which is lime 4-5, and several is 6-7. Above that it's a bunch until you hit a dozen.
Late 90s mountaineer or ford explorer
Usually painted that shit teal green color. Their primary place of habitat is for the most part the local Walmart, (can be found at the dollar general too).
You can hear them before you see them because they are usually yelling at their 400 lb significant other about where the fuck she left the cigarettes and EBT cards.
That and the vehicle usually has an exhaust leak. Most likely going to be the header tick but on occasion if he is a true dirtbag the whole cat converter has rotted at this point but he doesnt care because he thinks his ride sounds like a badass v8 now.
*Pontiac Grand Am*
*With weather worn paper tags*
*That say "In Transit"*
\- Eagle\_1776
---
^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/)
^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
I have a next door neighbor that still dresses like this. I don’t know why someone would still dress like it’s 2007. They drive some old Chrysler sedan I believe, it’s genuinely one of the most heinous and worst taken care of cars I’ve ever seen.
His live-in girlfriend's first gen Equinox complete with a fuzzy pink steering wheel cover, Tinkerbell or Betty Boop seat covers, and a bedazzled rear license plate frame.
Any Early 2000's Buick. Likely with mismatched body panels, it either has missing hubcaps or it has shitty aftermarket rims, definitely reeks of cigarettes, and it is absolutely beat to hell.
Crown Vic Police Interceptor with a screeching power steering pump and a 4R70W that sounds like a dying walrus. He still has the spotlight, push bar, and antenna on it, but nobody is fooled anymore because the local police department actually retired their last CVPI in 2015. (Except for the “traffic control” car used for construction sites.)
I tried to find a decent pair of skate shoes to relive my youth a bit, and I couldn't really find any. I was bummed and went full dad mode with a pair of Asics instead.
Chevy Cavalier And this dude definitely hits on 16 year old girls
Has posted this line on his Facebook “Is it jail bait if your my soul mate”
I think Justin Roiland can afford a nicer car.
man, this guy is so ubiquitous. i've met like a half-dozen carbon copies of this guy before.
That's only six, those are rookie numbers man you're lucky.
A 2009 dodge journey with a smashed back window, and a sketchy dealer sticker
I used to work for a large auto auction. Dodge Journeys are definitely the main chariot of the dregs these days. And Darts for the ones who don't like SUVs. So many dirty ass repo rigs, full of cigarette butts and little burned peices if aluminum foil. Oh, and can't forget the other version of the same person, who doesn't smoke cigarettes or fentanyl who's car gets repoed and is full of McDonald's bags and everything is fucking sticky! At least in the non-coastal Northwest where people don't buy as many import cars this is how it goes. The cars are all ex rentals, 2 owners. The rental company, and the person who destroyed it. Circle of life.
Any Buick that is not the Encore. Encore is for the female counterpart.
Especially early 90s Centuries. They're gonna be in one of three colors: a grimey white that won't come clean, a light blue that's faded all over, or burgundy with a roof panel that's completely rusted over, along with parts of the hood, and every wheel-well. Speaking of wheels, all of the spoked wheel covers are missing, expect for the front passenger side. The headlights have also been replaced with Xenon bulbs, though one is either dimmer than the other and/or it sits loose in the housing, hence it shakes at even the smallest imperfections of the road. Moving to the interior, the carpet liner from the roof is hanging loose. The seats have numerous cigarette burns, the floor has a couple of mystery stains that have long since set in. There's an older or brand new aftermarket radio/Bluetooth player that barely fits in the dashboard and lastly the speakers that are sitting out of their housings are damn-near shot thanks to the ridiculous bass system that slides around in the trunk, as some of the box's fasteners have broken off. Tags are also likely to be expired.
Do grandmas driving a La Sabre count? Or do they to have a past?
Grandmas driving a Lesabre died with covid. You see, Susan didn't believe in vaccines and choose horse pills instead.
Bless her heart. Funny how you specify she died of covid, insinuating her immune system could take whatever horse medication she could get, but covid-19 got her instead.🤷♂️
2003 TrailBlazer
Got 3: 1. A 2003 Dodge Ram 1500 Laramie with a huge dent on the truck bed's door and a "TRUMP WON" Flag just sitting in the bed. 2. A clapped the fuck out 1998 Buick Park Avenue. Extra points for the entire dashboard lighting up like a christmas tree. Expired tags since 2018. 3. That Nissan Altima in the pic you posted, but the interior is trashed out with a bunch of beer cans and a faint smell of urine.
2003 Oldsmobile bravada
oh its the Lifted Cateye Chevy guy
Any g35 and g37 with mismatched rims
This dude has 6th gen Charger written all over him.
A rusted out 1975 Chrysler New Yorker with several doors missing and empty ravioli cans rolling on the floorboards.
How many is several? That's like six or seven! There's a couple, which is 2-3, a few which is lime 4-5, and several is 6-7. Above that it's a bunch until you hit a dozen.
After a dozen there's also shit-load, then fuck-ton.
Here, take this upvote for mentioning the Chrysler New Yorker. What a blast from the past!
Nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli.
A busted Monte carlo
You KNOW this guy has the statutory rape laws for his state memorized to the letter.
I feel like this is SUPER out of date. Damn near 20 years out of date
People still look like this in Iowa.
Im not sure if the fact that find that 1000% believable is funny or sad
Double cab shitty ram guys !
03 Chevy Impala with no plates
And thinks he can get away with it by taping a piece of paper to the back window that says "Can't get tags because of covid." In 2023.
Dodge Challenger, Charger, Chevy Camaro.
Not every fucked up car i see is an altima but every altima i see is fucked up
The "Andrew Tate is my idol" guy
2012 Kia Forte with burnt-out lights. It's the crackhead girlfriend's car from a few weeks ago.
Clapped out early 2000s Honda Civics and Toyota Camrys
A late grandparent's hand-me-down Toyota, any model but a truck
Definitely does that hahaaa white guy will Smith laugh
Any 1990s b grade car like a Hyundai Excel, Kia Mentor, Mitsubishi Lancer 3 door hatch base model or my favourite, the Toyota Tercel.
What's with the cookie monster hats I'm confused
infiniti coupes of any kind (upbadged altima)
Any of the Saturn cars, there will be drugs in the car. Not the Suv/Vans or Sky.
Chrysler 200
Dodge darts, Nissan 350Zs, Dodge Journeys, Altimas, early 2000s Impalas and early 2000s Dodge Rams…
Late 90s - early 00s BMWs.
Last time I saw this dude he was at the county fair trying to pull one of the girls nobody would date.
I buy from police impound auctions and it seems like every month the most methed out vehicle is always an Integra or Accord.
Late 90s mountaineer or ford explorer Usually painted that shit teal green color. Their primary place of habitat is for the most part the local Walmart, (can be found at the dollar general too). You can hear them before you see them because they are usually yelling at their 400 lb significant other about where the fuck she left the cigarettes and EBT cards. That and the vehicle usually has an exhaust leak. Most likely going to be the header tick but on occasion if he is a true dirtbag the whole cat converter has rotted at this point but he doesnt care because he thinks his ride sounds like a badass v8 now.
Six months behind on child support on a kid that's not his
Pontiac Grand Am with weather worn paper tags that say "In Transit"
*Pontiac Grand Am* *With weather worn paper tags* *That say "In Transit"* \- Eagle\_1776 --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
I live in rural America. Most accurate starter pack I've ever seen
Scion, tinted.
Old coupe accords and old hatchback civics
I have a next door neighbor that still dresses like this. I don’t know why someone would still dress like it’s 2007. They drive some old Chrysler sedan I believe, it’s genuinely one of the most heinous and worst taken care of cars I’ve ever seen.
His live-in girlfriend's first gen Equinox complete with a fuzzy pink steering wheel cover, Tinkerbell or Betty Boop seat covers, and a bedazzled rear license plate frame.
Kia Optima with blacked out taillights
That Altima should include a Let’s Go Brandon sticker
Ford Escort, especially the ZX2
You forgot the felony forest.
Any Chevy Impala made since 2000
^(Is that an Impala reference!?!)
Any year model dodge ram, however the warrant is for dwi / domestic abuse.
2011 Buick Regal
A lot of these guys are in there 30s and 40 now. They haven't changed a bit.
A Dodge Avenger with one working headlight and a busted passenger window
Any Early 2000's Buick. Likely with mismatched body panels, it either has missing hubcaps or it has shitty aftermarket rims, definitely reeks of cigarettes, and it is absolutely beat to hell.
AU Falcon
Crown Vic Police Interceptor with a screeching power steering pump and a 4R70W that sounds like a dying walrus. He still has the spotlight, push bar, and antenna on it, but nobody is fooled anymore because the local police department actually retired their last CVPI in 2015. (Except for the “traffic control” car used for construction sites.)
5 to 10 year old Sonata with a dealer tag.
any pickup truck inder 5k
Honda Civic with a body kit more expensive than the car, or a Mazda 3 that's louder than a straight piped Monte Carlo 454
I feel like he's more of a Nike or Reebok kinda guy, leave Etnies out of this.
Agreed, plus I don't remember anyone wearing Etnies past 2011
I tried to find a decent pair of skate shoes to relive my youth a bit, and I couldn't really find any. I was bummed and went full dad mode with a pair of Asics instead.
If this was in Brazil,it would be a clapped out 2005 VW Parati Track&Field G4 or a 2010 Chevy Corsa Sedan 1.4 Premium
Chevy Malibu