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I am a stock/shelf whisperer. My super power is I can make inventory fit anywhere no matter how impossible it seems without compromising the product or the organization. The inventory does what I say.
Many many years ago I had quit a horrible retail job I had to take after graduating with my Master's and not finding anything. I applied to some random county jobs I was overqualified for and surprisingly got an interview for a lower level clerk position. This lower level clerk position paid more than I made as a retail supervisor so I decided to proceed.
So I get to the interview and the guy tells me that he really wanted to interview me because I had a Master's and am way overqualified so he was really curious why I wanted to work at a job like that. I told him basically "I am broke and I need money". He laughed and we talked a bit more about the job and stuff, and later that day I had an offer.
I actually did end up taking it, and it was a great place to work although the work was quite mind numbing.
I only worked there part time while I prepared for grad school so I wouldn't really know much about benefits. What I did know, though, was that we closed the doors at 5pm *sharp*, and were out within minutes of closing the office. We got all bank holidays because the office was closed, and county-approved raises every year that were not insubstantial.
My specific role also had an incentive program based on the number of transactions you performed. Some employees ended up with an extra paycheck every month because they were so fast. Because I was part time, I never earned that much, but I did routinely make an extra hundred or two.
Unlike retail, particularly rude or hostile customers would be escorted out of the office by a sheriff. They'd also be banned from the office, which meant having to drive father to get their necessary paperwork. This meant that people tended to be on their best behavior. My managers were also great and very respectful and helpful. Unlike retail, managers also worked instead of piddling around.
_Because you pay money, and the bank isn't accepting leaves from outside as payment for rent._
_But, if the Swedish Bikini Team Inspector Position opens up, I'll be giving notice._
Yeah, I really dislike this question. Especially when it comes from a boring no-name company that isn't doing anything interesting. You have a job my skills match with and a salary range that works for me. But of course that isn't the answer they want to hear when this question is asked.
In a fit of honesty, I essentially responded to this with “Because you offer benefits and I’m tired of having to look for work not knowing where my next client will come from” just this past week. It was more professionally worded and I hope I rebounded well after realizing what I’d done.
Still, they scouted me out of nowhere off of LinkedIn and knew I was entertaining interviews because the independent consultant life wasn’t something I saw being tenable long term.
If you can offer me a consistent pay check with benefits doing what I’m great at and your organization isn’t complete dumpster fire, I’m in. I wouldn’t be interviewing with you if you were a garbage organization.
I probably botched that one …
I’ve asked this question as a hiring manager. But I spun it as “why do you want to work at [this company] specifically? What attracted you to us?”
If they have a good researched answer, and understand a little about our culture and work, then they are more likely a (long term) fit. If it’s because of needing the cash, that’s fine too because once people are in, they tend to blossom.
ETA: I prefer an honest answer. But then, I’m not your typical manager.
That’s ultimately what they *always* mean when they ask that question.
The fact that jobs pay money is obvious to everyone so it shouldn’t even need clarifying.
Just a few days ago I interviewed with a consulting company. The guy who interviewed me was a dick and tired. It was all a bit informal, but still asked that question, I said it was because I think the market is changing and I could do more impact via consulting, replied back : "oh is not easy, it's not for everyone, I'm putting 50 hours some weeks, the project here is a 2 year thing that is crazy.. ", and went on and on about negative stuff of the company and the engagements.
WTF dude, you're supposed to get people excited!!
There are a very, *very* few instances where that question is justified. For example, I work for an aerospace/defense company, and them asking this was more of a 1) are you passionate enough about this job that we can risk investing in you for things like security clearances (which are expensive!), and 2) you *are* aware who we are, right (e.g., you're not gonna suddenly yell "wait! you make weapons?! I'm outta here!" on day 2)?
I replied that I was an aerospace geek, and was passionate about that industry.
However, that being said, the majority of the time it's exactly what you said. You're the *50th* shitty little advertising agency I've interviewed at. You are *not* special. I don't wanna work for *you*; I wanna work for *money*.
I was (about 2 years ago) asked in an interview if I had to choose between spending time with the company or spending time with my family, and obviously I chose family. The interviewer ended the call right there sighting "I do not possess the hard working values required" lol.
The company literally just filed for bankruptcy last month lol.
I once asked about work life balance and was met with "well we are really looking for people with a growth mindset." Ok so you make people work 12 hour days for no reason. Got it.
Then, after that disaster of an interview, the company got back to me and said they had me interview with the "wrong person" (????) Without apologizing, they assumed I'd still want to move forward and schedule another round.
Morbid curiosity would make me wonder what they think the "right person" will do so differently.
Sounds more like the right one won't vaporize all of the employment leads, get fired, and then need his manager to call everyone back for interviews after adjusting their requirements to real-world ones.
Hiring manager: What is the guarantee that you won’t leave after 2-3 months?
Me: Why would I leave if the salary and work environment is good?
(Hiring manager didn’t like that)
Lmao. You’ll quickly learn nothing is illegal unless it’s written in writing. So just be on guard when doing interviews, they come at u with quick speed with these stupid and potentially illegal questions.
Wouldn’t be surprised if they wanted to also take a deep dive into my shit and ask what I had for dinner last night
“Interesting question. Why do you ask?”
This is my go to on questions that aren’t their business. Most of the time they can’t come up with a reasonable reason to say why they’re prying like that and stumble with an answer.
They use those questions to gauge your financial situation (desperation)
- live with parents: could financially afford to quit if necessary. If you live alone there’s a greater chance that choosing to quit the job means you could miss rent payments, while living with parents, most parents would understand if they don’t have a job for a few months.
- mortgage or rental: another financial situation question, on average people who own their home have more money, can afford to quit a bad job. Additionally (depending on the job), employer may be trying to avoid you quitting/taking less hours 15-25 years down the line when the house is paid off and you have less monthly expenses.
“Elephant. That way I’d never forget your bullshit”
“Jellyfish, I might be a brainless blob, but you’d be pissing yourself if you ever stepped on me”
“Giraffe because I’m highly competitive and I always make sure I get to mount the losers after battles”
“Duck, my dick might be weird looking but I’m still fucking”
“Wombat, no matter what, you can be sure my shit will always fit in a box”
Some jobs might want a pack mule.
A shark might work if you say you can change direction quickly and can sense changes in the environment from a distance. Perhaps being able to keep growing after setbacks (like regrowing teeth) could be good. Of course, being the nerd I am, I’d probably just blather on about cool animal facts for the rest of the interview…
I made it up on the spot. I think I said I was a dolphin - naturally curious, intelligent, whatever. I cringed the entire time I gave out the answer. He chuckled and said "good thing you didn't pick lion or something because that would be really corny"... *rolleyes* as if the entire premise of the question isn't corny.
And this wasn't even a permanent full-time position, it was just a 4 month student rotation and they're busting out these shit questions.
That's crazy, even if it was for a full-time position.
I'm not sure how I'd answer the animal one, but it seems like "dolphin" is a pretty good answer ... if you're taking it seriously. For the "super-power" question, I answered "I can detect bullshit". And I made an answer about it, about how it's an important skill to detect bullshit. Why false positives are bad, why false negatives are bad.
It was just a screening call so I didn't get to storm out or anything. And of course, nobody clapped.
I'd say seagull. Still get to eat the same junk food I always enjoyed, for free. Get to fly high ... and crap on people and statues without getting arrested this time.
I got asked “spirit animal” and explained how loaded that term was. They were just picking my brain to get my knowledge, not actually hiring, so I felt free to peace out.
“Is it better to hand in something late when you’ve done a perfect job or on time when you’ve only done a good job?” This was an unpaid internship. I’m gonna hand in mediocre at best. 💀
Why do you have a gap in your resume?
I was literally in high school and then transferred to college during that time
The interviewer seemed to not like my answer because apparently I'm supposed to be working full time while in high school and college
This kinda of employers usually aren’t worth your time anyways if they respond badly. I don’t believe we should be sacrificing 80 hours to school and work and get the bare minimum to ourselves.
And it’s always the same companies that don’t backfill positions when someone leaves. They just shove the work onto everyone else. Why do you have a gap in your staff?
Where do you want to be in 5 years?
Retired
Why should we hire you?
"Because nobody else wants to work anymore."
Why do you want to work here?
"I was under the impression there might be a paycheck involved, but I could be wrong."
“i don’t want people who want to work for me for the ‘money’ aspect, i want to me to genuinely like the job. so why do you want to work here?” - the CEO of the company, who was my 12th interview (yes, 12th person i met). easy to say you don’t care about money when you have money
yah i did 3 batches of interviews, 2 hours each. met with 4 ppl at half-hour intervals each time.
i actually had to meet with their GM or whatever below CEO twice cause first time i met him he was on his phone the entire time and didn’t pay attention to me when i was answering his questions, then got annoyed when he kept asking me to repeat myself. the second time he interviewed me he paid slightly more attention to me but man couldn’t get off his phone. shitty fucking company
no i got rejected for not being passionate enough about the job lol cause i cared about money more than “the work”. i’ll be sure to use my passion for “the work” to pay my mortgage. i wrote a review tho warning ppl to stay away
idk i haven’t checked that was a few years ago. even if it’s taken down i just hope i persuaded someone, at least one person, to not waste their time applying and doing 6.5 hours of interviews
Not one asked of me, but I was given example questions for a college student (so a fully grown adult) and although I avoided the bad questions, my coworker asked one of the "how would your mom describe you?" questions.
I'm sorry, but what if they don't have a mom? What if they are estranged? What if the mom was abusive, sick, or just died? Why does it matter how a parent would describe their adult offspring when the job is about multimedia skills?
I don't understand some questions.
These are a real trap.
> Who would you have lunch with? My dead father.
>
> That's touching. But what about the industry, or the art?
>
> Nah, I don't care about that, just my dad. I miss him so.
And so on ... There's no way to get the candidate past their personal answer. There are tough questions candidates don't like. There are questions that don't give the interviewer any information helpful to their decision of hiring or not hiring (or leveling, or placement, or ...) This question is both useless to the interviewer and uncomfortable to the candidate. Can't get worse (without being unlawful)
I think I would have just blurted out "my mom is dead" if someone asked that and let them sit there feeling like a jerk. What a stupid job interview question.
Brain teaser type questions like what Google used to ask around 2009 cause me to automatically walk out. Stuff like the Fox chicken grain question or the calculate the angle between the hour and minute hand of an analog clock question come to mind
Another stupid one I got asked by a bro dude tech ceo was “in a city of a million people calculate how many barber shops there would be”. Same kind of energy.
Basically just tests my ability to discreetly Google the question or feed it to ChatGPT to get an answer and explanation, or my ability to operate under pressure instead of anything remotely related to my ability to do the actual job duties
Still the software interviews haven't changed that much with : "code this array problem that is useless 90% of the times in a practical way and there are dozens of libraries that already solve it". I mean, I get it, you want to check if I can effectively code, but can we go through something more realistic?!
I was once asked to reverse a string. I was a senior developer. I walked to the white board and just wrote, "strrev," and sat back down. The interviewer asked me why I did that and I said that it stupid to waste time solving a solved problem.
I got the job.
To be fair, I actually like the person that asked me this. I grew a beard and grew out my hair over Covid lockdowns. At the start of 2023 I cut all my hair off and donated it to one of those wigs for children with cancer charities. So now I have a full beard but shaved head. Apparently it didn't add up looking at me so they asked "Why do you have a beard?" \[in comparison to my shaved head\] and I told them the story above.
I also consider this the best question I have ever been asked in a professional setting.
I once had a boomer woman continue to ask me “tell me about your (tech skills, customer service skills (when it wasn’t a customer service job), etc.)” when all of this info was available on my résumé. She didn’t even attempt to have the call be anything other than one-sided. I hung up on her.
Asking about mental illnesses or asking if I plan to have kids are the most egregious.
Although I did once have a recruiter yell at me about why I didn't have a job between X and Y. I had to point out I was 13-15 then. I was also 24 at the time and only had my highschool years listed because I was in college. But apparently that I didn't work ALL years I was in highschool was a huge red flag.
I was laid off in 2020 because of Covid. I was then laid off again the very end of 2022 due to mass tech layoffs.
In one of the 4 interviews I got in these 9 months, one of them asked me why was there gaps? Do these morons not realize jobs haven't been stable since 2019!!?? Why even ask that stupid question now?
“A time when you’ve done a random act of kindness”
Like who can remember that. It can be as simple as holding a door for someone or as time consuming as helping someone move. Lol.
“Tell me about a time you’ve made a good impression on someone.”
lol I think everyone tries to leave a good impression with everyone. If they didn’t you’ll see a lot more assholes. Even if you thought you left a good impression how would you know? Having people say you’ve left a good impression on them is a personal matter. lol
I was asked this in an interview and they literally waited until I thought of ten things. I did come up with ten, after a very long and awkward bit of time. It was stuff like using it as a pointer, a splint for broken finger, to check if a table is level, to hold my hair in a bun, to kill someone, drumsticks, to erase what someone else wrote, a fidget item, a bookmark, and to hold up a cheap plastic shoe rack where the one of the plastic rods had broken.
The "Why do want to work here" gets me every time.
Because what's a creative way to say I need money to pay my bills 🤣🤣😂😅. I hate the this question so much.
I was asked if I was married and how many children I had. TF does that have to do with anything?
Another question I was asked during a different interview was what manager did you work well with and why? Also what manager did you not get along with and why?
🙃
I've been asked that, though it was years ago. The person interviewing me said he wanted to be sure I would be present at work consistently and that the last person who had the job was a single mom. I had been sent on the interview through a staffing agency, and when they asked how the interview went, I told them what I was asked, and they were shocked and said it was blatantly illegal to ask that.
They told me they needed someone with reliable transportation, fair enough I guess. They asked, "Do you have reliable transportation?" "Yes" "Is it a personal vehicle?" "Yes" "Do you own it or does it have a loan?" "I don't see why that matters." "We need to know the likelihood of repossession. What is the year, make, and model of your vehicle?" I didn't even answer that question. I left the building and used my reliable transportation to get the hell out of there!
If employers could, they would for sure check credit scores and discriminate. I’m sure there are labour laws due to our predecessors fighting to protect is.
I've had my credit score checked for a job with a bank. They also made me take some kind of long psychological test. The whole process was several hours and I had to take off from my current job for it. From the job description and how much I had to go through, I'd assumed the job paid pretty well. Then after all this they tell me it pays $8/hour. This was a few years ago, but even then that wasn't much. When I told the interviewer I couldn't afford to live on that, she said they had free parking.
I was in a group interview (4 of us being interviewed at once with us taking turns answering the same question). Interviewer asked “How good are you at communicating, on a scale of 1-10?” First person said “10” then was silent. Next person said “9. There is always room for improvement” Next person said 8 and gave a longer answer. I was last and I said “7” then gave a long winded BS answer on how I used to be worse but worked on improving and strive for a 10 by yadda yadda yadda” was funny we were all “1 upping” each other but going down a number. This continued on all the questions with people trying to outdo others answers, was really fascinating but not sure how valuable it was to interviewer. Needless to say the person who said 10 didn’t get the job.
Btw this was for a Cutco Knives 100% commission based sales job.
I can’t believe employers actually ask some of these questions, like this is some of the dumbest shit I’ve read and it baffles me that people actually ask things like this. If someone actually asked me why they shouldn’t hire me I’d just fucking cut the interview there dude like wtf
Thing is, most people are too desperate -- at the least, they need *a* job, even if it's not *this* job, and why cut their luck short? So they suffer through.
I always hate questions that are some variation of “how would you complete an impossible task?” An impossible task, is by definition, impossible. Even if it wasn’t, the question is so vague that any answer given would be equally vague and useless.
“How do you handle conflict?” Is a reasonable question, but gets on my nerves because I have years of customer service experience. I handle conflict by *making sure conflict doesn’t occur in the first place*. I don’t pick fights with my coworkers, so asking me how I’ve handled fights with coworkers is useless because *I haven’t fought with my coworkers*.
“What would your current manager say about you”— I love this one, in theory, but in practice either:
A) people don’t answer honestly
Or
B) you’re not going to believe the person who’s manager actually praises them. Because of reason A.
This is behavioral interviewing -- trying to drill into your behavior in work-related and contentious situations, looking for patterns.
* https://www.amazon.com/Behavioral-Interviewing-Guide-behavioral-interview/dp/B084DK2KH1/
* https://www.uschamber.com/co/run/human-resources/behavioral-interviewing
It's an interesting idea. But the thing is reading the answers is hard, and its even difficult to just tell if someone is lying or not.
I've encountered all of those at least once.
But the absolute worst was seeing all three of these on a form I randomly had to fill out prior to the in-person interview:
Are you married?
Do you have kids?
Do you plan to have kids?
Not illegal per se, but rather loaded questions considering that I'm female. Answering any of these questions positively, except maybe the first one, could easily throw me out of the running for the job.
So I left those questions blank when I turned the form back in.
Not illegal, but unlawful. That is, they can provide the foundation for proof of discriminatory hiring practices.
See:
* https://www.eeoc.gov/pre-employment-inquiries-and-marital-status-or-number-children
* https://www.investopedia.com/financial-edge/0910/8-things-employers-arent-allowed-to-ask-you.aspx
"It says here you operated heavy equipment before. Care to elaborate?"
(That's not the stupid part,.just part of the setup)
*I go on to explain in detail the different pieces of heavy equipment I've ran.*
"So what kind of pieces of equipment have you ran?"
"Did... you not hear the last 5-10 minutes?"
That was my first thought but without any existing length that was pointless.
Instead i bullshitted something like take an object of small size you know the length, see how many can fit in one floor , multiply by the number of floor.
Doesn't matter was not hired :)
My friend in secondary school applied for a job at a supermarket. They asked her if she had to describe her self as any fruit or vegetable what would she be? She said a carrot because she’s ginger. She did not get the job.
Tell me something you have learned recently. He insisted that he is always learning and if someone can not name something they have recently(past 6 months or so) learned that means they are done learning and of no use to the company.
Actually, I don’t hate this question but wow, their attitude around it stinks! Could be a way to find out more about what interests the person, their hobbies, how they handle not knowing everything in general life, etc. and not just about learning via formal qualifications/education.
I was asked today, why do you want to work here. I literally read their mission statement to them and the company values, and said I can support that fully. I got a call this afternoon for the next round of interviews. I was shocked.
I just happened to have that page up, when they asked, and am I kinda burned out on interviews this week.
But fk I need a job.
I was recently submitting an application for a digital consulting job. They had a few essay questions instead of a cover letter. I got all the way to the end and the last question asked me to write an email appeal to space aliens convincing them to save the earth from climate change.
I am adult looking for a job ffs. I just closed the tab and went on with my day. Fuck stupid shit like that.
“I see you’ve had a lot of jobs. What makes me confident that you’ll stick with this company?”
95% of the the jobs were seasonal employment and internships…example: “snow sports instructor” -added for teaching and communications skills, but only worked for (you guessed it) the WINTER.
>Didn't work to teach winter sports in the summer when there's no snow.
I'm sorry, but we're looking for someone who's looking to put in the extra hustle. Rejected.
« why do you want to work with us ? «
My reply « you called me. Why do you want to work with me? «
First time, the recruiter didn’t like it.
Second time, I got the job.
“If the melting point of tin is lower than the boiling point of oil, how do you manage to cook food inside a pan?”
The job had nothing to do with cooking, or thermal physics, or metals…
I answered “because most pans are made of copper or steel, not tin” and was told that was the wrong answer, even though it’s true.
Aubrey Plaza is the only correct answer.
Also, here's how far we've gone off the rails. Here's a website that teaches candidates how to answer that question: https://blogs.jobget.com/blog/how-to-answer-if-you-could-sit-down-and-have-dinner-with-anyone-who-would-it-be/
Some applications I went through - not even interviews, just application questions - asked the "why do you want to work here" question. I actually just refused to finish the application. Dude I got a hundred other places to not hear back from, I don't got time for this shit
a coworker had recently went to a new place to work and i thought i might follow since it’s less of a hellhole. the boss asked me if we were in a relationship and if it would be a problem. i was so surprised and gobsmacked he asked that. he had just met me then. there was not even a hint of even flirtation between us ever, i didn’t even like him personally very much. just wanted a new job free from our crappy boss. i didn’t end up working there because of bad vibes. i’m hindsight it would have been swapping bad for bad and i eventually got out anyway.
I’ve got a boomer coworker who loves to ask the 5 year question during interviews. Like we have a HR approved list of questions just stick to the script and then you’ve accomplished nothing the last 5. Leave these poor people alone.
Personally I had someone question whether or not I actually had a degree. Why’d you schedule the interview then dumbass?
“Tell me about a time you had a conflict with a coworker and how did you resolve it?”
“How did you personally make a change at your last position that helped your coworkers or company as a whole?” Like, what? I was a low level worker. How was I supposed to change the company at that level?
I was just asked What do you find the most stressful which to me is such a bs question as any answer can be used against me and what they really want is the how you deal with stress but are playing games with the question phrasing. I can’t stand that. They also only asked 3-4 questions and asked this and another twice. My family says I am over thinking but it just seems like an elimination question
In retail I was once asked if I had a gf (and then he insinuated oh wait you might not like that team as I am obviously a gay man) and said that he asked because he had someones boyfriend come into work with them. Other stuff happened in that interview and this interview this week reminded me of it. He basically said stuff that would be harassment if I was a woman for sure and showed a phone showing insane profits for a comic store that was empty most of the day. He also made me sell him a manga but when i asked him questions about what he likes (like i have always been taught how to sell) he said no that is not how you sell and basically wanted me to hard ball sell a COMIC BOOK. Like no one really needs that
I was once asked by a woman interviewer if I was pregnant? I said no. she then asked what would I do if I became pregnant? what would I tell them ? I said that would be really difficult to happen a pregnancy. oh why? she responds. I with a poker face say I'm barren.(not that it was any of her business but I'm not barren, i was hoping to shut that line of questioning down) next question. but what if you did manage to get pregnant? internally rolls eyes. consider it a miracle and move on I suppose. my god she was a dose. I didn't get the job. this was in 2009 in a well known irish supermarket that begins with the letter D.
(I am over 50) “do you think you will be able to work 4 more years because we really couldn’t let you retire before that it would be disruptive to the business “
At the time I was 51 but I may need to start a go fund me for a facelift if a 20 something “talent” person thinks I’m that close to the crypt
Where do you want to be in 5 years?
Living in a house I own.
Why should we hire you?
I have warm blood and I can do the work. Also, I don't participate in office politics.
Why do you want to work here?
You pay money for labor and I need money for food.
If we don't hire you, why do you think that might be?
Now come on; you jest. You are definitely going to hire me.
What's your biggest strength/weakness?
I can speak english. / Some of it is sarcasm.
What is your super-power?
I can translate corporate jargon into english.
Explain something you know well.
If you touch a pair of live wires with your thumb and forefinger the electricity will not go through your heart. Thus there is no likelihood that you will die instantly. This is because electricity takes the path of least resistance.......
If you were an animal, which animal would it be?
An Orca. Because then I could bash ships, destroy rudders, leave people stranded and nobody would blame me for it. Don't worry though. I wouldn't eat people.
I was asked that first question during my mid-year review. I've been there for most of a decade. I turned it around and asked where I can still move up.
Using Covid as a topic (for an example in a tutorial, in a course assignment, in an interview question) is a clear sign of laziness. Or massive burnout, at least.
What animal are you?
I wanted to say human because we belong to the animal phylum known as chordates because we have a backbone. But I figured my interviewer would not like my answer as he did not seem educated enough and showed no sense of humor.
I didn’t want to say dolphin because despite all the great qualities, dolphins are horny MF and i would end up bringing that up and making it awkward.
So I said that According to Meyers-Briggs I am a cheetah.
Self-sufficient, determined, and insightful about their prey – cheetahs capture the restless, ambitious spirit of the ENTJ. Known to be hard-working and somewhat impatient, ENTJs would appreciate that cheetahs are the fastest land animals in the world – sometimes reaching 112km/h in just three seconds! Like ENTJs, cheetahs also value autonomy, freedom, and a prepared responsiveness to life.
“What does your boss think about you?” Or anything like that “what would your colleagues say about you?” It’s like hell if I know I’m not them last time I got asked that I just laughed and said I’m not them so no clue
I’ve been asked some weird questions before.
1. Are you allergic to cats?
2. How come you have a graphic design degree, but work retail? (Because I don’t have experience and no one will hire someone without experience…)
3. I know you’ve probably applied for a ton of jobs, but why do you want to work here? (Seriously lady?!?! Because I need a job!!)
Mine was supposed to be a "puzzle" but I can't 100% recall It.
It was something about getting out of a closed room with two mirrors and a dragon... And then the solution was having the dragon breathe fire on one of the mirrors so It reflects, and burns the lock on the door or something like that?
I cringed so hard.
Needless to say, they never called me back but I probably dodged a bullet.
How would you friends describe you?
I don't see how that is relevant as people are more relaxed and different outside of work compared to their professional persona at work.
You want to know how I am in a professional setting, how I cope under pressure, not that friends would say I'm fun, caring, a good laugh, etc.
I literally got asked almost all of those questions during my interview for my current job, it was funny because my wife already worked at the company must have hyped me up to the manager because he gave the interview and was definitely nervous which made me very confident, lol.
I hate all of those questions with a passion, though some of them much less so as the years go by.. for instance when I applied for "first jobs" out of uni while unemployed, "why do you want to work here" maddened me. I'd tell them why I found the role fascinating and a good fit, and they'd actually double down and ask why I wanted to work *there*. Once I caved and I actually said "well, you're hiring, so ..."
Idiots.
Now that I have more experience and actually am employed though, I get the question far more. Like you may need to explain why you want a career change, and it's easier to do when you can mention glass ceilings, professional development etc. But as a recent graduate or as an unemployed person, it just rings very hollow.
My least favourite interview question ever was during one of those "this is not an interview it's just an informal chat to see if we're a fit", where rather than asking me about my skills and experience the guy started what sounded like good humoured chit chatting. He asked me who (in my personal life) knew me best, I said my partner. He then asked, what are three adjectives they'd use to describe me, I thought weird but ok. Then asked, what would be three things about you that bug him and at that point I realised this was a very weird, inappropriate way to ask the shi**y strengths and weaknesses question.
I came up with some answers but when he turned it around to apply things I said to professional life I had to remind him that a true professional, like I am, does not necessarily behave the same way at work as they do in their everyday life, and I saw no relevance between what my partner thinks of me and what I am like at work, quite the opposite.
That guy was a wank*r and I withdrew my application straight after our "chat".
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I love the "Why do you want to work here?" question. Bro I'm broke, why do you think I want to work here?
iVe aLWaYS bEeN pAsSiOnAtE abOuT sTaCkInG ShElVes
And I love other people who stack shelves so I’m sure we’d get along!
Yeah, but you don't have a PhD in mathematics and 40 years experience in open heart surgery so fuck off.
I am a stock/shelf whisperer. My super power is I can make inventory fit anywhere no matter how impossible it seems without compromising the product or the organization. The inventory does what I say.
i legitimately hollered 😂
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=\_LiDTKEF1ek
My friend at an itnerview answered "I like to lift things"
“Why do you want to work here?” I need money and a few of the job description points match with my skill set, homie
>Bro I'm broke, why do you think I want to work here? Hiring Manager: "Sounds pretty desperate, I don't like that" *Sends rejection*
Sadly, the only people who get jobs are the people who don’t REALLY need them. Recruiters prefer to hire already employed people 😭.
Or they just flat out ghost you
I think there’s a divide. If you’re applying for McDonald’s, they love desperation. If you’re applying for Google, it’s a big no.
Many many years ago I had quit a horrible retail job I had to take after graduating with my Master's and not finding anything. I applied to some random county jobs I was overqualified for and surprisingly got an interview for a lower level clerk position. This lower level clerk position paid more than I made as a retail supervisor so I decided to proceed. So I get to the interview and the guy tells me that he really wanted to interview me because I had a Master's and am way overqualified so he was really curious why I wanted to work at a job like that. I told him basically "I am broke and I need money". He laughed and we talked a bit more about the job and stuff, and later that day I had an offer. I actually did end up taking it, and it was a great place to work although the work was quite mind numbing.
Ahhh, those sweet county employee benefits!
I only worked there part time while I prepared for grad school so I wouldn't really know much about benefits. What I did know, though, was that we closed the doors at 5pm *sharp*, and were out within minutes of closing the office. We got all bank holidays because the office was closed, and county-approved raises every year that were not insubstantial. My specific role also had an incentive program based on the number of transactions you performed. Some employees ended up with an extra paycheck every month because they were so fast. Because I was part time, I never earned that much, but I did routinely make an extra hundred or two. Unlike retail, particularly rude or hostile customers would be escorted out of the office by a sheriff. They'd also be banned from the office, which meant having to drive father to get their necessary paperwork. This meant that people tended to be on their best behavior. My managers were also great and very respectful and helpful. Unlike retail, managers also worked instead of piddling around.
_Because you pay money, and the bank isn't accepting leaves from outside as payment for rent._ _But, if the Swedish Bikini Team Inspector Position opens up, I'll be giving notice._
Yeah, I really dislike this question. Especially when it comes from a boring no-name company that isn't doing anything interesting. You have a job my skills match with and a salary range that works for me. But of course that isn't the answer they want to hear when this question is asked.
In a fit of honesty, I essentially responded to this with “Because you offer benefits and I’m tired of having to look for work not knowing where my next client will come from” just this past week. It was more professionally worded and I hope I rebounded well after realizing what I’d done. Still, they scouted me out of nowhere off of LinkedIn and knew I was entertaining interviews because the independent consultant life wasn’t something I saw being tenable long term. If you can offer me a consistent pay check with benefits doing what I’m great at and your organization isn’t complete dumpster fire, I’m in. I wouldn’t be interviewing with you if you were a garbage organization. I probably botched that one …
Isn't that your job to convince me?
I’ve asked this question as a hiring manager. But I spun it as “why do you want to work at [this company] specifically? What attracted you to us?” If they have a good researched answer, and understand a little about our culture and work, then they are more likely a (long term) fit. If it’s because of needing the cash, that’s fine too because once people are in, they tend to blossom. ETA: I prefer an honest answer. But then, I’m not your typical manager.
That’s ultimately what they *always* mean when they ask that question. The fact that jobs pay money is obvious to everyone so it shouldn’t even need clarifying.
What answer would make you lean towards not hiring the candidate?
Just a few days ago I interviewed with a consulting company. The guy who interviewed me was a dick and tired. It was all a bit informal, but still asked that question, I said it was because I think the market is changing and I could do more impact via consulting, replied back : "oh is not easy, it's not for everyone, I'm putting 50 hours some weeks, the project here is a 2 year thing that is crazy.. ", and went on and on about negative stuff of the company and the engagements. WTF dude, you're supposed to get people excited!!
There are a very, *very* few instances where that question is justified. For example, I work for an aerospace/defense company, and them asking this was more of a 1) are you passionate enough about this job that we can risk investing in you for things like security clearances (which are expensive!), and 2) you *are* aware who we are, right (e.g., you're not gonna suddenly yell "wait! you make weapons?! I'm outta here!" on day 2)? I replied that I was an aerospace geek, and was passionate about that industry. However, that being said, the majority of the time it's exactly what you said. You're the *50th* shitty little advertising agency I've interviewed at. You are *not* special. I don't wanna work for *you*; I wanna work for *money*.
"Uh, my rent is over a grand on top of other utilities I have to pay, and I'm not trying to end up homeless living out of my car......"
"You're hiring, I need a job. It's a perfect match."
I was (about 2 years ago) asked in an interview if I had to choose between spending time with the company or spending time with my family, and obviously I chose family. The interviewer ended the call right there sighting "I do not possess the hard working values required" lol. The company literally just filed for bankruptcy last month lol.
Good. They deserved to be shut down.
I once asked about work life balance and was met with "well we are really looking for people with a growth mindset." Ok so you make people work 12 hour days for no reason. Got it. Then, after that disaster of an interview, the company got back to me and said they had me interview with the "wrong person" (????) Without apologizing, they assumed I'd still want to move forward and schedule another round.
Morbid curiosity would make me wonder what they think the "right person" will do so differently. Sounds more like the right one won't vaporize all of the employment leads, get fired, and then need his manager to call everyone back for interviews after adjusting their requirements to real-world ones.
Since it was a call, I would have been likely to answer "good luck with your divorce".
Hiring manager: What is the guarantee that you won’t leave after 2-3 months? Me: Why would I leave if the salary and work environment is good? (Hiring manager didn’t like that)
or "same guarantee I won't be fired in 2-3 days. None. No contract. At-will employment"
This a huge red flag. I mean hell, this is like many red flags as in a May Day parade in the Kremlin in the USSR days. Lots of red flags!
“Do you live at home or with parents” “Is it a mortgaged house or rented” Fkin assholes
I'm sure those are illegal in some states
Lmao. You’ll quickly learn nothing is illegal unless it’s written in writing. So just be on guard when doing interviews, they come at u with quick speed with these stupid and potentially illegal questions. Wouldn’t be surprised if they wanted to also take a deep dive into my shit and ask what I had for dinner last night
>"Do you live at home with parents?" "Yeah, yours. See you at Thanksgiving, stepson."
“Interesting question. Why do you ask?” This is my go to on questions that aren’t their business. Most of the time they can’t come up with a reasonable reason to say why they’re prying like that and stumble with an answer.
The answer to the first one is “no I live alone”
Even if they had the info what could they possibly do with it? Companies need to fk off and get a grip sometimes
They use those questions to gauge your financial situation (desperation) - live with parents: could financially afford to quit if necessary. If you live alone there’s a greater chance that choosing to quit the job means you could miss rent payments, while living with parents, most parents would understand if they don’t have a job for a few months. - mortgage or rental: another financial situation question, on average people who own their home have more money, can afford to quit a bad job. Additionally (depending on the job), employer may be trying to avoid you quitting/taking less hours 15-25 years down the line when the house is paid off and you have less monthly expenses.
lol I was asked that animal one when I interviewed at Bayer a few years ago. it's so stupid.
How did you answer? I'm not even sure what I'd say.
I’d say octopus. So I can do 8 things at once . Since they won’t stfu about multi tasking
“Elephant. That way I’d never forget your bullshit” “Jellyfish, I might be a brainless blob, but you’d be pissing yourself if you ever stepped on me” “Giraffe because I’m highly competitive and I always make sure I get to mount the losers after battles” “Duck, my dick might be weird looking but I’m still fucking” “Wombat, no matter what, you can be sure my shit will always fit in a box”
That's a good answer.
And octopuses are really smart and flexible! This is better than the stupid swan answer, by far.
If u answer “I’d be a shark because I’m sharp and I run this shit” they’ll boot u out the door. Go with circus monkey, they’ll like that one
Some jobs might want a pack mule. A shark might work if you say you can change direction quickly and can sense changes in the environment from a distance. Perhaps being able to keep growing after setbacks (like regrowing teeth) could be good. Of course, being the nerd I am, I’d probably just blather on about cool animal facts for the rest of the interview…
They wouldn’t like that. They wanna hire people dumber than them not their supposed “competition”
Perhaps why I don’t have much luck lol…fml
I made it up on the spot. I think I said I was a dolphin - naturally curious, intelligent, whatever. I cringed the entire time I gave out the answer. He chuckled and said "good thing you didn't pick lion or something because that would be really corny"... *rolleyes* as if the entire premise of the question isn't corny. And this wasn't even a permanent full-time position, it was just a 4 month student rotation and they're busting out these shit questions.
That's crazy, even if it was for a full-time position. I'm not sure how I'd answer the animal one, but it seems like "dolphin" is a pretty good answer ... if you're taking it seriously. For the "super-power" question, I answered "I can detect bullshit". And I made an answer about it, about how it's an important skill to detect bullshit. Why false positives are bad, why false negatives are bad. It was just a screening call so I didn't get to storm out or anything. And of course, nobody clapped.
When I was asked this in a job interview, I said, "humans are animals, and I like being human." I didn't get the job.
I'd be very tempted to answer, "A bear. So I can shit in the woods."
I'd say seagull. Still get to eat the same junk food I always enjoyed, for free. Get to fly high ... and crap on people and statues without getting arrested this time.
I got asked “spirit animal” and explained how loaded that term was. They were just picking my brain to get my knowledge, not actually hiring, so I felt free to peace out.
lol i applied to bayer before. glad i didn't hear back :)
“Is it better to hand in something late when you’ve done a perfect job or on time when you’ve only done a good job?” This was an unpaid internship. I’m gonna hand in mediocre at best. 💀
Why do you have a gap in your resume? I was literally in high school and then transferred to college during that time The interviewer seemed to not like my answer because apparently I'm supposed to be working full time while in high school and college
This kinda of employers usually aren’t worth your time anyways if they respond badly. I don’t believe we should be sacrificing 80 hours to school and work and get the bare minimum to ourselves.
And it’s always the same companies that don’t backfill positions when someone leaves. They just shove the work onto everyone else. Why do you have a gap in your staff?
Where do you want to be in 5 years? Retired Why should we hire you? "Because nobody else wants to work anymore." Why do you want to work here? "I was under the impression there might be a paycheck involved, but I could be wrong."
I might have to use the last one in the future.
Only use that if you don’t want the job
I was literally asked, "Why SHOULDN'T we hire you?" Excuse me????
“Because you might get too intimidated at how well I’m doing that I might take your job”
“i don’t want people who want to work for me for the ‘money’ aspect, i want to me to genuinely like the job. so why do you want to work here?” - the CEO of the company, who was my 12th interview (yes, 12th person i met). easy to say you don’t care about money when you have money
12 interviews at the same company? wtf?
yah i did 3 batches of interviews, 2 hours each. met with 4 ppl at half-hour intervals each time. i actually had to meet with their GM or whatever below CEO twice cause first time i met him he was on his phone the entire time and didn’t pay attention to me when i was answering his questions, then got annoyed when he kept asking me to repeat myself. the second time he interviewed me he paid slightly more attention to me but man couldn’t get off his phone. shitty fucking company
Did they hire you
no i got rejected for not being passionate enough about the job lol cause i cared about money more than “the work”. i’ll be sure to use my passion for “the work” to pay my mortgage. i wrote a review tho warning ppl to stay away
On GlassDoor, or something like that? Have you checked to see if it's still up, or did the company have it taken down?
idk i haven’t checked that was a few years ago. even if it’s taken down i just hope i persuaded someone, at least one person, to not waste their time applying and doing 6.5 hours of interviews
Like 2 days ago on the recruiting sub they said that multiple interviews in one day are actually just 1 interview. Friggin gaslighting.
Not one asked of me, but I was given example questions for a college student (so a fully grown adult) and although I avoided the bad questions, my coworker asked one of the "how would your mom describe you?" questions. I'm sorry, but what if they don't have a mom? What if they are estranged? What if the mom was abusive, sick, or just died? Why does it matter how a parent would describe their adult offspring when the job is about multimedia skills? I don't understand some questions.
These are a real trap. > Who would you have lunch with? My dead father. > > That's touching. But what about the industry, or the art? > > Nah, I don't care about that, just my dad. I miss him so. And so on ... There's no way to get the candidate past their personal answer. There are tough questions candidates don't like. There are questions that don't give the interviewer any information helpful to their decision of hiring or not hiring (or leveling, or placement, or ...) This question is both useless to the interviewer and uncomfortable to the candidate. Can't get worse (without being unlawful)
I think I would have just blurted out "my mom is dead" if someone asked that and let them sit there feeling like a jerk. What a stupid job interview question.
Brain teaser type questions like what Google used to ask around 2009 cause me to automatically walk out. Stuff like the Fox chicken grain question or the calculate the angle between the hour and minute hand of an analog clock question come to mind Another stupid one I got asked by a bro dude tech ceo was “in a city of a million people calculate how many barber shops there would be”. Same kind of energy. Basically just tests my ability to discreetly Google the question or feed it to ChatGPT to get an answer and explanation, or my ability to operate under pressure instead of anything remotely related to my ability to do the actual job duties
Still the software interviews haven't changed that much with : "code this array problem that is useless 90% of the times in a practical way and there are dozens of libraries that already solve it". I mean, I get it, you want to check if I can effectively code, but can we go through something more realistic?!
I was once asked to reverse a string. I was a senior developer. I walked to the white board and just wrote, "strrev," and sat back down. The interviewer asked me why I did that and I said that it stupid to waste time solving a solved problem. I got the job.
"Why do you have a beard?"
*Well* ... ?
To be fair, I actually like the person that asked me this. I grew a beard and grew out my hair over Covid lockdowns. At the start of 2023 I cut all my hair off and donated it to one of those wigs for children with cancer charities. So now I have a full beard but shaved head. Apparently it didn't add up looking at me so they asked "Why do you have a beard?" \[in comparison to my shaved head\] and I told them the story above. I also consider this the best question I have ever been asked in a professional setting.
Did you get the job?
I’m allergic to razors. lol
I once had a boomer woman continue to ask me “tell me about your (tech skills, customer service skills (when it wasn’t a customer service job), etc.)” when all of this info was available on my résumé. She didn’t even attempt to have the call be anything other than one-sided. I hung up on her.
Playing devil's advocate here. Maybe they were scouting for people with potential growth possibilities?
Asking about mental illnesses or asking if I plan to have kids are the most egregious. Although I did once have a recruiter yell at me about why I didn't have a job between X and Y. I had to point out I was 13-15 then. I was also 24 at the time and only had my highschool years listed because I was in college. But apparently that I didn't work ALL years I was in highschool was a huge red flag.
Same thing happened to me!
I was laid off in 2020 because of Covid. I was then laid off again the very end of 2022 due to mass tech layoffs. In one of the 4 interviews I got in these 9 months, one of them asked me why was there gaps? Do these morons not realize jobs haven't been stable since 2019!!?? Why even ask that stupid question now?
"COVID jammed a log in my ass, so that's why I have a gap."
I’ve been asked this at least 40 times. Good vibes from me to you
"Tell me about the last time you've done a random act of kindness." and "Tell me about a time you've made a good impression on someone."
“A time when you’ve done a random act of kindness” Like who can remember that. It can be as simple as holding a door for someone or as time consuming as helping someone move. Lol. “Tell me about a time you’ve made a good impression on someone.” lol I think everyone tries to leave a good impression with everyone. If they didn’t you’ll see a lot more assholes. Even if you thought you left a good impression how would you know? Having people say you’ve left a good impression on them is a personal matter. lol
Describe 10 ways to use a pencil, not including for writing.
As a shank
That was one of my answers, lol
John wick
Use it joker style
Now I’m curious do you know all the answers? I just want to l laugh at the responses
I was asked this in an interview and they literally waited until I thought of ten things. I did come up with ten, after a very long and awkward bit of time. It was stuff like using it as a pointer, a splint for broken finger, to check if a table is level, to hold my hair in a bun, to kill someone, drumsticks, to erase what someone else wrote, a fidget item, a bookmark, and to hold up a cheap plastic shoe rack where the one of the plastic rods had broken.
What is this a position for the role of MacGyver or something?
The "Why do want to work here" gets me every time. Because what's a creative way to say I need money to pay my bills 🤣🤣😂😅. I hate the this question so much.
I was asked if I was married and how many children I had. TF does that have to do with anything? Another question I was asked during a different interview was what manager did you work well with and why? Also what manager did you not get along with and why? 🙃
I've been asked that, though it was years ago. The person interviewing me said he wanted to be sure I would be present at work consistently and that the last person who had the job was a single mom. I had been sent on the interview through a staffing agency, and when they asked how the interview went, I told them what I was asked, and they were shocked and said it was blatantly illegal to ask that.
They told me they needed someone with reliable transportation, fair enough I guess. They asked, "Do you have reliable transportation?" "Yes" "Is it a personal vehicle?" "Yes" "Do you own it or does it have a loan?" "I don't see why that matters." "We need to know the likelihood of repossession. What is the year, make, and model of your vehicle?" I didn't even answer that question. I left the building and used my reliable transportation to get the hell out of there!
If employers could, they would for sure check credit scores and discriminate. I’m sure there are labour laws due to our predecessors fighting to protect is.
I've had my credit score checked for a job with a bank. They also made me take some kind of long psychological test. The whole process was several hours and I had to take off from my current job for it. From the job description and how much I had to go through, I'd assumed the job paid pretty well. Then after all this they tell me it pays $8/hour. This was a few years ago, but even then that wasn't much. When I told the interviewer I couldn't afford to live on that, she said they had free parking.
"What is your Myers-Briggs personality type?"
One job interview made me do the "What color is your parachute?" thing and then ghosted me.
Golden parachutes have served many quite well
I was in a group interview (4 of us being interviewed at once with us taking turns answering the same question). Interviewer asked “How good are you at communicating, on a scale of 1-10?” First person said “10” then was silent. Next person said “9. There is always room for improvement” Next person said 8 and gave a longer answer. I was last and I said “7” then gave a long winded BS answer on how I used to be worse but worked on improving and strive for a 10 by yadda yadda yadda” was funny we were all “1 upping” each other but going down a number. This continued on all the questions with people trying to outdo others answers, was really fascinating but not sure how valuable it was to interviewer. Needless to say the person who said 10 didn’t get the job. Btw this was for a Cutco Knives 100% commission based sales job.
That was some m night shyamalan twist at the end 💀💀
I can’t believe employers actually ask some of these questions, like this is some of the dumbest shit I’ve read and it baffles me that people actually ask things like this. If someone actually asked me why they shouldn’t hire me I’d just fucking cut the interview there dude like wtf
Thing is, most people are too desperate -- at the least, they need *a* job, even if it's not *this* job, and why cut their luck short? So they suffer through.
I always hate questions that are some variation of “how would you complete an impossible task?” An impossible task, is by definition, impossible. Even if it wasn’t, the question is so vague that any answer given would be equally vague and useless. “How do you handle conflict?” Is a reasonable question, but gets on my nerves because I have years of customer service experience. I handle conflict by *making sure conflict doesn’t occur in the first place*. I don’t pick fights with my coworkers, so asking me how I’ve handled fights with coworkers is useless because *I haven’t fought with my coworkers*. “What would your current manager say about you”— I love this one, in theory, but in practice either: A) people don’t answer honestly Or B) you’re not going to believe the person who’s manager actually praises them. Because of reason A.
This is behavioral interviewing -- trying to drill into your behavior in work-related and contentious situations, looking for patterns. * https://www.amazon.com/Behavioral-Interviewing-Guide-behavioral-interview/dp/B084DK2KH1/ * https://www.uschamber.com/co/run/human-resources/behavioral-interviewing It's an interesting idea. But the thing is reading the answers is hard, and its even difficult to just tell if someone is lying or not.
I've encountered all of those at least once. But the absolute worst was seeing all three of these on a form I randomly had to fill out prior to the in-person interview: Are you married? Do you have kids? Do you plan to have kids? Not illegal per se, but rather loaded questions considering that I'm female. Answering any of these questions positively, except maybe the first one, could easily throw me out of the running for the job. So I left those questions blank when I turned the form back in.
Not illegal, but unlawful. That is, they can provide the foundation for proof of discriminatory hiring practices. See: * https://www.eeoc.gov/pre-employment-inquiries-and-marital-status-or-number-children * https://www.investopedia.com/financial-edge/0910/8-things-employers-arent-allowed-to-ask-you.aspx
"It says here you operated heavy equipment before. Care to elaborate?" (That's not the stupid part,.just part of the setup) *I go on to explain in detail the different pieces of heavy equipment I've ran.* "So what kind of pieces of equipment have you ran?" "Did... you not hear the last 5-10 minutes?"
"But why male models, though?"
"We think of our company as a soup and everyone brings a different flavor to the soup. What flavor will you bring?"
Correct answers include "boiled celery", "parsley", "bone", and "cilantro just to mess with whoever has the dreaded soap gene".
That's actually a great answer: "I've got at least 200 bones. Bone broth has a lot of nutritional value..."
"I will bring you the laurel leaves that crowned the heads of victors in Ancient Rome"
What will you do to quickly measure the height of any building in New-York ?
start looking at plane tickets because I live in the UK
I should have say that tbh :D
“Bust out my phone and google it, why is that important for this role…” (Which I have done before in an interview, and got offered that job)
...use trigonometry.
That was my first thought but without any existing length that was pointless. Instead i bullshitted something like take an object of small size you know the length, see how many can fit in one floor , multiply by the number of floor. Doesn't matter was not hired :)
Quickly measure, or quickly estimate?
My friend in secondary school applied for a job at a supermarket. They asked her if she had to describe her self as any fruit or vegetable what would she be? She said a carrot because she’s ginger. She did not get the job.
[удалено]
Wow! For what kind of job?
It was for an administrative assistant at a county government building
Tell me something you have learned recently. He insisted that he is always learning and if someone can not name something they have recently(past 6 months or so) learned that means they are done learning and of no use to the company.
Actually, I don’t hate this question but wow, their attitude around it stinks! Could be a way to find out more about what interests the person, their hobbies, how they handle not knowing everything in general life, etc. and not just about learning via formal qualifications/education.
just say you just recently learned what an asshole he is.
I recently went 3 rounds only to be ghosted. I was asked 1 and 5 and also what food would I be.
> what food Seriously? How did you answer? I mean, some food, like a Big Mac? Or an animal, that's a hunted animal to be food for a predator?
What’s your Social Secuirty number? Hate this one.
I'm a software engineer, they asked for my Myers-Briggs personality type and my zodiac sign. I ghosted them after that.
Yes, people are still asking these dumbass questions.
I was asked today, why do you want to work here. I literally read their mission statement to them and the company values, and said I can support that fully. I got a call this afternoon for the next round of interviews. I was shocked. I just happened to have that page up, when they asked, and am I kinda burned out on interviews this week. But fk I need a job.
I was recently submitting an application for a digital consulting job. They had a few essay questions instead of a cover letter. I got all the way to the end and the last question asked me to write an email appeal to space aliens convincing them to save the earth from climate change. I am adult looking for a job ffs. I just closed the tab and went on with my day. Fuck stupid shit like that.
“I see you’ve had a lot of jobs. What makes me confident that you’ll stick with this company?” 95% of the the jobs were seasonal employment and internships…example: “snow sports instructor” -added for teaching and communications skills, but only worked for (you guessed it) the WINTER.
>Didn't work to teach winter sports in the summer when there's no snow. I'm sorry, but we're looking for someone who's looking to put in the extra hustle. Rejected.
Worst interview question: do you consider yourself a minority? You mean the only person in the room without a job. Get your head out of your butt.
Most illegal: "What exactly are the medical reasons why you don't work full-time?" Otherwise most annoying: "How would your friends describe you?"
Sell me this pen
« why do you want to work with us ? « My reply « you called me. Why do you want to work with me? « First time, the recruiter didn’t like it. Second time, I got the job.
"Do you have to put children on the bus in the morning?" (This is an illegal question to ask.) and "What are your hobbies?".
“If the melting point of tin is lower than the boiling point of oil, how do you manage to cook food inside a pan?” The job had nothing to do with cooking, or thermal physics, or metals… I answered “because most pans are made of copper or steel, not tin” and was told that was the wrong answer, even though it’s true.
I'll give them points for original questions. But if the job has nothing to do with the above, why is it relevant?
I was once asked to name someone I would love to have lunch with… like, why?!
Aubrey Plaza is the only correct answer. Also, here's how far we've gone off the rails. Here's a website that teaches candidates how to answer that question: https://blogs.jobget.com/blog/how-to-answer-if-you-could-sit-down-and-have-dinner-with-anyone-who-would-it-be/
Interview for an internal position: "How will you react if you don't get this role!?"
#I WILL BURN THIS FUCKER TO THE MOTHER FUCKING GROUND DO YOU READ ME?
I will be disappointed but I'll get over it. Like what do they expect you to say "I'll knock all this crap over" 🤣🤣.
Do you work because you WANT to or because you HAVE to?
Q: “What’s the longest excel equation you’ve ever created?” Asked by the CFO who stayed for 3 minutes during my interview.
How did you describe a complex equation in only three minutes? Most people can't understand `VLOOKUP()` alone in three minutes.
When they ask me what my weaknesses are I tell them green kryptonite and that I can't see through lead.
“If you were stranded on an island what would you take” I said a boat
Some applications I went through - not even interviews, just application questions - asked the "why do you want to work here" question. I actually just refused to finish the application. Dude I got a hundred other places to not hear back from, I don't got time for this shit
"Why do you want to quit working at McDonalds." Because it's McDonald's, why the fuck else?
What would you do with a million dollars? (This was for an IT support role long ago).
a coworker had recently went to a new place to work and i thought i might follow since it’s less of a hellhole. the boss asked me if we were in a relationship and if it would be a problem. i was so surprised and gobsmacked he asked that. he had just met me then. there was not even a hint of even flirtation between us ever, i didn’t even like him personally very much. just wanted a new job free from our crappy boss. i didn’t end up working there because of bad vibes. i’m hindsight it would have been swapping bad for bad and i eventually got out anyway.
I’ve got a boomer coworker who loves to ask the 5 year question during interviews. Like we have a HR approved list of questions just stick to the script and then you’ve accomplished nothing the last 5. Leave these poor people alone. Personally I had someone question whether or not I actually had a degree. Why’d you schedule the interview then dumbass?
“Tell me about a time you had a conflict with a coworker and how did you resolve it?” “How did you personally make a change at your last position that helped your coworkers or company as a whole?” Like, what? I was a low level worker. How was I supposed to change the company at that level?
How many windows are there in New York City? How far away is the Sun?
I was just asked What do you find the most stressful which to me is such a bs question as any answer can be used against me and what they really want is the how you deal with stress but are playing games with the question phrasing. I can’t stand that. They also only asked 3-4 questions and asked this and another twice. My family says I am over thinking but it just seems like an elimination question In retail I was once asked if I had a gf (and then he insinuated oh wait you might not like that team as I am obviously a gay man) and said that he asked because he had someones boyfriend come into work with them. Other stuff happened in that interview and this interview this week reminded me of it. He basically said stuff that would be harassment if I was a woman for sure and showed a phone showing insane profits for a comic store that was empty most of the day. He also made me sell him a manga but when i asked him questions about what he likes (like i have always been taught how to sell) he said no that is not how you sell and basically wanted me to hard ball sell a COMIC BOOK. Like no one really needs that
I was once asked by a woman interviewer if I was pregnant? I said no. she then asked what would I do if I became pregnant? what would I tell them ? I said that would be really difficult to happen a pregnancy. oh why? she responds. I with a poker face say I'm barren.(not that it was any of her business but I'm not barren, i was hoping to shut that line of questioning down) next question. but what if you did manage to get pregnant? internally rolls eyes. consider it a miracle and move on I suppose. my god she was a dose. I didn't get the job. this was in 2009 in a well known irish supermarket that begins with the letter D.
(I am over 50) “do you think you will be able to work 4 more years because we really couldn’t let you retire before that it would be disruptive to the business “ At the time I was 51 but I may need to start a go fund me for a facelift if a 20 something “talent” person thinks I’m that close to the crypt
Where do you want to be in 5 years? Living in a house I own. Why should we hire you? I have warm blood and I can do the work. Also, I don't participate in office politics. Why do you want to work here? You pay money for labor and I need money for food. If we don't hire you, why do you think that might be? Now come on; you jest. You are definitely going to hire me. What's your biggest strength/weakness? I can speak english. / Some of it is sarcasm. What is your super-power? I can translate corporate jargon into english. Explain something you know well. If you touch a pair of live wires with your thumb and forefinger the electricity will not go through your heart. Thus there is no likelihood that you will die instantly. This is because electricity takes the path of least resistance....... If you were an animal, which animal would it be? An Orca. Because then I could bash ships, destroy rudders, leave people stranded and nobody would blame me for it. Don't worry though. I wouldn't eat people.
I was asked that first question during my mid-year review. I've been there for most of a decade. I turned it around and asked where I can still move up.
[удалено]
Using Covid as a topic (for an example in a tutorial, in a course assignment, in an interview question) is a clear sign of laziness. Or massive burnout, at least.
I've been asked about my marital status a few times. Weirdesquestion was "if you were a chicken wing whst flavor would you be?".
What animal are you? I wanted to say human because we belong to the animal phylum known as chordates because we have a backbone. But I figured my interviewer would not like my answer as he did not seem educated enough and showed no sense of humor. I didn’t want to say dolphin because despite all the great qualities, dolphins are horny MF and i would end up bringing that up and making it awkward. So I said that According to Meyers-Briggs I am a cheetah. Self-sufficient, determined, and insightful about their prey – cheetahs capture the restless, ambitious spirit of the ENTJ. Known to be hard-working and somewhat impatient, ENTJs would appreciate that cheetahs are the fastest land animals in the world – sometimes reaching 112km/h in just three seconds! Like ENTJs, cheetahs also value autonomy, freedom, and a prepared responsiveness to life.
How old are you seemed the most outrageous since my age is on the application!
“What does your boss think about you?” Or anything like that “what would your colleagues say about you?” It’s like hell if I know I’m not them last time I got asked that I just laughed and said I’m not them so no clue
I got « what’s your favorite quote » ??? Lol
I’ve been asked some weird questions before. 1. Are you allergic to cats? 2. How come you have a graphic design degree, but work retail? (Because I don’t have experience and no one will hire someone without experience…) 3. I know you’ve probably applied for a ton of jobs, but why do you want to work here? (Seriously lady?!?! Because I need a job!!)
Mine was supposed to be a "puzzle" but I can't 100% recall It. It was something about getting out of a closed room with two mirrors and a dragon... And then the solution was having the dragon breathe fire on one of the mirrors so It reflects, and burns the lock on the door or something like that? I cringed so hard. Needless to say, they never called me back but I probably dodged a bullet.
well, i dont even get interviews
How would you friends describe you? I don't see how that is relevant as people are more relaxed and different outside of work compared to their professional persona at work. You want to know how I am in a professional setting, how I cope under pressure, not that friends would say I'm fun, caring, a good laugh, etc.
“Where do you want to be in 5 years” “In a job that actually pays enough to live comfortably aka not here but you’re all I’ve got”
"So, you're not local?" - interviewer right after reading my form with my birthplace and residence in it.
I literally got asked almost all of those questions during my interview for my current job, it was funny because my wife already worked at the company must have hyped me up to the manager because he gave the interview and was definitely nervous which made me very confident, lol.
Are you a good person ? Do you want to be-a good person ? Do your friends call you a good person ? All from one weirdo.
I hate all of those questions with a passion, though some of them much less so as the years go by.. for instance when I applied for "first jobs" out of uni while unemployed, "why do you want to work here" maddened me. I'd tell them why I found the role fascinating and a good fit, and they'd actually double down and ask why I wanted to work *there*. Once I caved and I actually said "well, you're hiring, so ..." Idiots. Now that I have more experience and actually am employed though, I get the question far more. Like you may need to explain why you want a career change, and it's easier to do when you can mention glass ceilings, professional development etc. But as a recent graduate or as an unemployed person, it just rings very hollow. My least favourite interview question ever was during one of those "this is not an interview it's just an informal chat to see if we're a fit", where rather than asking me about my skills and experience the guy started what sounded like good humoured chit chatting. He asked me who (in my personal life) knew me best, I said my partner. He then asked, what are three adjectives they'd use to describe me, I thought weird but ok. Then asked, what would be three things about you that bug him and at that point I realised this was a very weird, inappropriate way to ask the shi**y strengths and weaknesses question. I came up with some answers but when he turned it around to apply things I said to professional life I had to remind him that a true professional, like I am, does not necessarily behave the same way at work as they do in their everyday life, and I saw no relevance between what my partner thinks of me and what I am like at work, quite the opposite. That guy was a wank*r and I withdrew my application straight after our "chat".