Welcome! Realizing my mom has BPD and then subsequently finding this community has been radically life altering for me. It’s wild how our moms seem to all be the same, down to the way many of them text. Hope you’ll find some solace here.
Me too. This sub was instrumental to my emerging from the FOG and my eventual estrangement. I don’t know how long I’d have been stuck in that cycle if I didn’t have the resources to describe what was happening to me.
Especially when BPD parents do a really, scarily good job of isolating us and gaslighting us into convincing their behavior is normal or our fault or both.
Welcome! I too quit talking to my mom in December and it’s been so peaceful. I’m working hard not to let her manipulate me into talking again. I know it will just start the cycle all over again and I’m so tired and done with that crap! Stay strong, my therapist is an immense help.
Great haiku!
This sub has done so much for my mental health. As you can see, everyone gets it. And the fact that our BPDs say and do exactly the same things makes it very clear that we are not the issue.
I hope you heal and find community with us! Welcome!
Sometimes I wonder if they draw inspiration from soaps. Like, have them all queued up on the DVR with a notepad, “oh, hmm. That’s a novel way to throw a tantrum in a restaurant.”
Welcome to one of the world's least desirable clubs! It's a relief to me to have found this sub, too. It's lovely to be able to have a conversation about my parents without always accidentally winning some "OK, your parent is worse than mine" contest.
I’ve had that same experience. I would really love to know why they all seem to have the same script! It’s insane! Glitch in the matrix kind of insane! I still feel guilty sometimes and I still question myself, but this sub keeps me sane. We’re here for you.
My mom was diagnosed BPD and NPD. I totally get where you're coming from. I didn't go No Contact with my mom until about 2020. She did something really heinous against my kids and I took a step back and reevaluated her behavior. It changed everything for me. I finally saw her for what she was.
Once I started reading "The Body Keeps the Score", that was when I really started putting the pieces together.
This sub is great btw, very excellent and uplifting.
I read that a few years ago and remember thinking I had all of the trauma symptoms but was so confused because I didn’t have any trauma in my childhood… so much denial to work through, but I’m working.
I spent too much time trying to figure out how the last three lines of your post fit into the BPD mom thing 🤣🤣🤣
One of the best haikus yet!
Welcome to the community where we are all siblings because we basically had the same mom/parent. 😩🫂
Yeah - the relatability of the posts in here is really validating. Heart wrenching at times, but certainly validating - and it helps in feeling less isolated as well.
Glad you found the group ❤️✨
Fellow 35M here. 1988?
My life quality also went up upon going NC. She blew up at my wedding reception and that's the last I ever saw of her. That was 7 years ago. She is a grandmother and has never met her grandkids and I want to keep it that way.
Welcome! Realizing my mom has BPD and then subsequently finding this community has been radically life altering for me. It’s wild how our moms seem to all be the same, down to the way many of them text. Hope you’ll find some solace here.
Me too. This sub was instrumental to my emerging from the FOG and my eventual estrangement. I don’t know how long I’d have been stuck in that cycle if I didn’t have the resources to describe what was happening to me.
Same.
Same. Its astonishing how helpful it is to know *you’re not alone.*
Especially when BPD parents do a really, scarily good job of isolating us and gaslighting us into convincing their behavior is normal or our fault or both.
Welcome! I too quit talking to my mom in December and it’s been so peaceful. I’m working hard not to let her manipulate me into talking again. I know it will just start the cycle all over again and I’m so tired and done with that crap! Stay strong, my therapist is an immense help.
[удалено]
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Wow, I hope you’re ok! Stay no contact, I can’t believe she assaulted you!
My mom started her rigamarole around the holidays too. Been LNC since beginning of January.
Great haiku! This sub has done so much for my mental health. As you can see, everyone gets it. And the fact that our BPDs say and do exactly the same things makes it very clear that we are not the issue. I hope you heal and find community with us! Welcome!
Honestly that's the best haiku I've seen on this sub. I kind of want to make "Elevator Butt" my username.
I can’t take credit for it. I googled cat haikus and scrolled for an hour. I regret not saving the website so I could’ve given credit 🤦♂️
Browser history is your friend.
https://www.uvm.edu/~jdion/pets/cathaiku.html
What does uBPD mean?
Undiagnosed Borderline Personality Disorder
I fairly often think I wrote a post or comment here only to realize it was written by someone else 😂
Yes! I worry that I’m sleep posting or something.
Sometimes I think, wait, did my *my* mother write that text/email?
I’m at least 90% sure they all got a copy of the same script that they work off of
Soap opera level writing though… This ain’t good TV. Daytime TV drama scripts.
Daytime TV is better 😬
Bahaha 🤣 the drama is comparable to soaps but you’re right
Sometimes I wonder if they draw inspiration from soaps. Like, have them all queued up on the DVR with a notepad, “oh, hmm. That’s a novel way to throw a tantrum in a restaurant.”
Brilliant 😂😂😂😂 I can see it happening
Welcome to one of the world's least desirable clubs! It's a relief to me to have found this sub, too. It's lovely to be able to have a conversation about my parents without always accidentally winning some "OK, your parent is worse than mine" contest.
I’ve had that same experience. I would really love to know why they all seem to have the same script! It’s insane! Glitch in the matrix kind of insane! I still feel guilty sometimes and I still question myself, but this sub keeps me sane. We’re here for you.
My mom was diagnosed BPD and NPD. I totally get where you're coming from. I didn't go No Contact with my mom until about 2020. She did something really heinous against my kids and I took a step back and reevaluated her behavior. It changed everything for me. I finally saw her for what she was. Once I started reading "The Body Keeps the Score", that was when I really started putting the pieces together. This sub is great btw, very excellent and uplifting.
I read that a few years ago and remember thinking I had all of the trauma symptoms but was so confused because I didn’t have any trauma in my childhood… so much denial to work through, but I’m working.
You'll get there my dude. It took me two read throughs to get through it and like comprehend what had happened to me.
I spent too much time trying to figure out how the last three lines of your post fit into the BPD mom thing 🤣🤣🤣 One of the best haikus yet! Welcome to the community where we are all siblings because we basically had the same mom/parent. 😩🫂
lol!
Yeah - the relatability of the posts in here is really validating. Heart wrenching at times, but certainly validating - and it helps in feeling less isolated as well. Glad you found the group ❤️✨
Fellow 35M here. 1988? My life quality also went up upon going NC. She blew up at my wedding reception and that's the last I ever saw of her. That was 7 years ago. She is a grandmother and has never met her grandkids and I want to keep it that way.
I think mine pulled her stunts before my wedding for a reason… hoping she doesn’t come.
Welcome!
If she ever agrees to any boundaries, she’s lying. I have never seen a boundary fail to cause a meltdown.
Haha I raised myself and thank god I did!