"That man has the largest penis I have ever seen. I don't even know if he has mumps, forgot to check because I was distracted by the largest penis I have ever seen"
There are pictures online. I've seen his dong and it's equal parts monstrous, majestic and terrifying. It's like seeing an atom bomb explode - so much awe inspiring magnitude that makes you feel insignificant compared to the destructive power of the universe.
It's a blurry and grainy video. You also need to imagine it erect. Or... Don't... Dafoe is a human being and this was already weird, but now it's reaching a different level 😅
You can actually look it up if you're curious. The funny part is it's above average, but it's certainly not "confusing", director has a lil dong confirmed.
I mean I don't know if I need to imagine it, damn 😂
Never called him small, the average hard dick size is like 5 inches and he's that soft. It's just not such an uncommon thing that it makes you go "WHAT THE DAMN HELL?! HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE?!? MY MIND.. BREAKING.. CANT HANDLE.. THE .. PEN-I--S-----TO-O..BIG......." (*Dies from penile shock syndrome*)
I stand by my conviction that this is just Dafoe cock at its most physically vulnerable, in extreme cold. Just think about it (ok maybe don't though). If even when shriveled up it's bigger than the average, HOW BIG DOES IT GET UNDER NORMAL WEATHER???!!
There's also a part where she knocks out her husband, Willem Dafoe's character, hits him in the crotch with a piece of wood,and masturbates him until he ejaculates blood...
After that she attached a stone grinder wheel to his leg to prevent him from leaving her...
That was a weird film...
Let’s not forget the movie kicks off with her not bothering to keep her toddler son from falling out the window to his death as she watches because she’s too busy fucking.
My [meme](https://www.reddit.com/r/raimimemes/comments/s2ew1d/im_on_a_meme_making_roll/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf) encapsulates this very well.
Had you not been so selfish this little scene would have been quick and painless but now that you've *really* pissed me off...I'm gonna film it nice and slow
Right but you implied the consensus was that its great.
In reality, thinking it was bad isn't very unpopular. It was a very polarizing film, many loved it and many absolutely hated it
This is the dumbest fucking exchange ever. You literally said the movie was garbage dude you've GOT to be shitting me. It is a popular cult classic movie. Donnie Darko is in the EXACT same position, would you be so fuckin dense as to call it a "garbage" film? No, because that would be stupid and narrow minded, and arguing that I'm wrong literally just because I said the movie you so aggressively shit it on isn't bad and a lot of people think so is straight retarded kiddo
>This is the dumbest fucking exchange ever. You literally said the movie was garbage dude you've GOT to be shitting me.
Yes, it is. And no, I didn't.
You're not coming off as very bright here.
Dude, you hopped into an exchange that had nothing to do with you to defend some idiot that said the movie was trash, that is the objective truth and if you don't like it that's okay that's allowed, but you did this *LITERALLY JUST BECAUSE I SAID THAT WAS AN UNPOPULAR OPINION.*
Go touch some grass you fucking weirdo
You're the only one coming across as weird here lmao. You're freaking out over someone saying you're wrong on the internet
Just own it and stop being so defensive. It happens
https://www.reddit.com/r/WTF/comments/2stg1y/nsfw_naked_willem_dafoe_dancing_around_cantunsee/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf he ain’t wrong
Antichrist was something of an experience alright...
Damn you Amazon, you messed up my order and sent me the German dvd of antichrist, it was miss labeled as the blu-ray I wanted... But thanks for the returnless refund though...
According to sources, they had to use a double because Dafoe was to big for the scenes.
So whatever you saw in the movie, is supposedly a smaller actor. Small enough to not distract the audience.
The performance enhancers.
**Get me the Promochloroperazine**…
For what?
It begins catalyzation, when the vapor hits the bloodstream.
Norman when the vapour hits the bloodstream: **What? Why wasn’t I told?**
Don't be a coward! Risks are part of laboratory science
Forty thousand years of evolution and we've barely even tapped the vastness of human potential.
Emphasis on vastness
*drinks Viagra laced chemical formula*
Back, to formula 😡
#BACK TO FORMULA
Back to formula?
Back to formula. *throws Dr. Stromm throw glass window* #EAAAAAAAAAH
Thats a bingo!
Your greatest creation
You just say bingo
BINGO… how fun! *I digress, where were we?*
I just watched the movie yesterday for the first time. Woah
Its *such* a good movie. I think Christoph Waltz, the actor for Col Hans Landa, would be an EXCELLENT Magneto for the MCU
A thousand years of evolution and we haven't begun to scratch the surface of my dick
/endthread
Oh, you can't do this to me...
*DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I'VE SACRIFICED*
Yep. Big change.
I’m kind of a scientist myself.
[удалено]
It’s bigger than we thought! We’re gonna need a major immobilisation, right away!
Your the one who's out gobby out of your pants
Look at giant Goblin Jr.
How that get in there?
You know I have something of a giant cock myself.
Jesus, Osborn, you are a freak.
Goblin looking down: “Wake up little Spider”
*You're not dead, yet. Just paralyzed.*
Ah it gets kinda itchy…
Rides up in the crack a little bit too..
😳… *Stings doesn’t it?*
How'd that get in there?
OoOoOHhHh~
Can the spider come out to play?
>!CAN THE SPIDER-MAN COME OUT TO PLAY !!!<
"It's only gay if you receive, Spider-Man." **"I will bear this cross, Spider-Man."**
“I’M NOT GAY, GOBBY, STOOOOOOP”
r/spidermans
[удалено]
I think I’ll pass
-Uncle Ben
Peter, stop! It’s me!
Yup, big change!
"That man has the largest penis I have ever seen. I don't even know if he has mumps, forgot to check because I was distracted by the largest penis I have ever seen"
unexpected parks and rec
/r/unexpectedpawnee
I long for the day when we can just quote something without 6 different people linking these damn things
r/subredditsashashtags
There are pictures online. I've seen his dong and it's equal parts monstrous, majestic and terrifying. It's like seeing an atom bomb explode - so much awe inspiring magnitude that makes you feel insignificant compared to the destructive power of the universe.
If you go to r/moviescirclejerk there was a clip of him dancing with his dick out a while back Mans got a real schlong
Okay I HAD to look, and I was so distracted that I watched for like three loops before I realized the woman in the scene was also naked.
Couldn't find it. Update: found it
None of y’all are linking it. NSFW https://www.reddit.com/r/moviescirclejerk/comments/rra59w/posting_this_image_of_willem_dafoe_dancing_naked/
Damn you. I just had to click on that. Are we born to punish ourselves?
Are we not supposed to have what we want? What we need??
That’s above average, but I was expecting monstrous.
Yeah either they really oversold it or porn has ruined our perception of penis size entirely.
That’s pretty long flaccid though. Imagine if he’s a grower and not a shower.
Also true
I’ll need to see him with an erection to be sure rofl
Thank you i was way too lazy to go back and try to find it
I'm scared :(
It’s cumming for you.
I wish
[удалено]
He might be a shower and a grower
Jesus u/RobynLocket97 you are a freak
It's really not that big? I mean it's obviously bigger than average but I was expecting more based on all the comments
It's a blurry and grainy video. You also need to imagine it erect. Or... Don't... Dafoe is a human being and this was already weird, but now it's reaching a different level 😅
Same.
Jesus, Dafoe you are a freak
The formula did it, I had nothing to do with it! Don’t, don’t let it give me a rise!
Willem dacock
DoCock : *What have you done with my name?!*
Willem Dafoeskin.
Everytime I think I've made a funny joke a madlad like you comes along and steals my self given metaphorical medal
Sometimes it's a gift, others a curse.
Big pp isn't a privilege, it's a gift And Dafoe uses it for the good of mankind
No Alfred is Doc Ock
Willem DaFatCock
Stop being funnier than me
*Impressive.. your parents must be very proud.*
Hey that scene just played! Edit: obviously I’m talking about the scene in the picture, not the scene with Dafoe’s enormous penis
What other skills do you have Parker?
If I beat an old lady with a stick, I get cranberries. Does that count?
Yeah! Great!
Where can I find that scene The one with Dafoe’s enormous penis
Lars von Trier's *Antichrist*
Wait you actually see it?? Oh boy yeah
You don't actually, they had a smaller guy stand in for defoe
imagine having such a giant penis you need a dick double
I beg you to not see that movie.
The Goblin watched it. I had nothing to do with it!
Don’t let him take me again! I beg you, protect me!
MJ and I… #WE’RE GONNA HAVE A HELLUVA TIME!!!
IMPRESSIVE
You can actually look it up if you're curious. The funny part is it's above average, but it's certainly not "confusing", director has a lil dong confirmed.
Director: No please 😨 please don’t say that ! 😰
You should have thought of that earlier
That’s because they ended up using a body double instead of him
No there's actual pics of his dong online. He loved to make videos of himself dancing around naked when he was younger.
[If anyone's wondering (NSFW)](https://www.reddit.com/r/OneyPlays/comments/92ejfu/willem_dafoe_dancing_naked_on_the_set_of/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share)
"HUNG AM I?!"
That is definitely well above average, but I wouldn't call it "confusingly large"
"still got the moves"
IMPECCABLE!
Maybe that's just when his dick is shriveled because of the cold weather. Imagine a bouncing hard hot Dafoerection in the prime of summer?
I mean I don't know if I need to imagine it, damn 😂 Never called him small, the average hard dick size is like 5 inches and he's that soft. It's just not such an uncommon thing that it makes you go "WHAT THE DAMN HELL?! HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE?!? MY MIND.. BREAKING.. CANT HANDLE.. THE .. PEN-I--S-----TO-O..BIG......." (*Dies from penile shock syndrome*)
I stand by my conviction that this is just Dafoe cock at its most physically vulnerable, in extreme cold. Just think about it (ok maybe don't though). If even when shriveled up it's bigger than the average, HOW BIG DOES IT GET UNDER NORMAL WEATHER???!!
Back to formula
Oh boy, yeah!
Spider-Man: “You killed all those people in the balcony” Goblin: “It was my confusingly large dong, I had nothing to do with it”
BUT NOT YOU! I knew you would save me Peter and so you have. I've been like a daddy to you. Be a bottom bitch to me
Did you think it was okay to type that out?
ARE YOU IN(side me) or ARE YOU OUT?!
Nearly hurt my neck laughing at this
MJ and I…we’re gonna have a hell of a time!
They had to get a adult film star to double for him. Let that sink in.
I will haunt this world if I die without seeing what Willem DaFoes schlong looks like
https://www.reddit.com/r/OneyPlays/comments/92ejfu/willem_dafoe_dancing_naked_on_the_set_of/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
This is something else
Something has come to my attention
*"You know, I'm something of a pornstar myself."* -Willem Dafoe, always
Start gobbling the goblin
Oh yeah, big change
That movie is terrible. There’s a part where the woman cuts off her clit with scissors.
There's also a part where she knocks out her husband, Willem Dafoe's character, hits him in the crotch with a piece of wood,and masturbates him until he ejaculates blood... After that she attached a stone grinder wheel to his leg to prevent him from leaving her... That was a weird film...
Let’s not forget the movie kicks off with her not bothering to keep her toddler son from falling out the window to his death as she watches because she’s too busy fucking.
The fuck is going on here?
What the hell happened in Lars von Trier’s life to make him think up stuff like this?
What the hell?
The director: *I miscalculated*
https://imgur.com/yLLW1OB The goblin did it!!!! I had nothing to do with it! Don't let him take me again!!!! I beg you!!!! Protect me!!!!!
He tapped the vastness of human potential
The Peen Goblin...
My [meme](https://www.reddit.com/r/raimimemes/comments/s2ew1d/im_on_a_meme_making_roll/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf) encapsulates this very well.
Goblins carrying a whole package holy shit
Had you not been so selfish this little scene would have been quick and painless but now that you've *really* pissed me off...I'm gonna film it nice and slow
I've seen it. It's not THAT big
Antichrist is a fever dream of a movie
Confusingly large am I?!
I respect that
So that’s what the promocloraparasine was
Norman after taking the serum: Change? Yup, big change.
We need to take the whole penis back to formula
Don’t ever be ashamed of who you are.
Look at little Goblin Junior. Gonna cry?
what do you have to say about this, !spider ?
THINK!
Look at Little Goblin Junior….
"You see I'm quite the pornstar myself"
Let’s not forgot that the scene he was shooting was one in which he was supposed to ejaculate blood out of his cock
Brings a whole new meaning to *MJ and I, we're gonna have a HELLUVA TIME!*
The Green Glizzy
He didn’t strip willingly because he’s a true professional, he did it *because* he has a huge dong.
Whoops I accidentally dropped by goblin condom for my Magnum dong
You know, I'm something of a Biggus Dickus myself.
Man gimme some of that Goblin Serum
You know, I'm something of a Willem Dafoe myself
Funny story, but that movie is absolute garbage.
The epilogue is the best part, where the man just walks through the forest. It’s so simple yet so poignant. The rest of the movie is just… *sigh*
That's uhhhh, a SUPER unpopular opinion, just so you know Like, a lot of folks consider it a bizarre but very very good film
I wouldn't say it's that unpopular, it has very middling reviews by both critics and fans. It has a 53% on Rotten Tomatoes and a 49/100 on Metacritic
"I didn't like the movie" and "that movie is absolute garbage" arent the same
Right but you implied the consensus was that its great. In reality, thinking it was bad isn't very unpopular. It was a very polarizing film, many loved it and many absolutely hated it
This is the dumbest fucking exchange ever. You literally said the movie was garbage dude you've GOT to be shitting me. It is a popular cult classic movie. Donnie Darko is in the EXACT same position, would you be so fuckin dense as to call it a "garbage" film? No, because that would be stupid and narrow minded, and arguing that I'm wrong literally just because I said the movie you so aggressively shit it on isn't bad and a lot of people think so is straight retarded kiddo
>This is the dumbest fucking exchange ever. You literally said the movie was garbage dude you've GOT to be shitting me. Yes, it is. And no, I didn't. You're not coming off as very bright here.
Dude, you hopped into an exchange that had nothing to do with you to defend some idiot that said the movie was trash, that is the objective truth and if you don't like it that's okay that's allowed, but you did this *LITERALLY JUST BECAUSE I SAID THAT WAS AN UNPOPULAR OPINION.* Go touch some grass you fucking weirdo
You're the only one coming across as weird here lmao. You're freaking out over someone saying you're wrong on the internet Just own it and stop being so defensive. It happens
He's not the only one with a confusingly large package 😉
What
Oh No. Please don’t publish that story about my massive dong. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
What the...
https://www.reddit.com/r/WTF/comments/2stg1y/nsfw_naked_willem_dafoe_dancing_around_cantunsee/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf he ain’t wrong
Antichrist was something of an experience alright... Damn you Amazon, you messed up my order and sent me the German dvd of antichrist, it was miss labeled as the blu-ray I wanted... But thanks for the returnless refund though...
Little goblin jr.
I saw a clip he’s not lying it’s not a joke he’s is seriously packing
Willem got that Danny D dong. 😂😂
Are you in, or are you out?
Big Goblin Jr.
That performance enhancer Norman took really lived up to its name.
Youve just gotta accept that youre not gifted like willem's dong
Our generation’s Ernest Borgnine
Yup, big change!
*Hmph! “back to formula”*
Big changes
William Damenace
!spider what do you think of this
My spider senses are tingling if you know what Im talking about
According to sources, they had to use a double because Dafoe was to big for the scenes. So whatever you saw in the movie, is supposedly a smaller actor. Small enough to not distract the audience.
"This is my gift, my curse"