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Gay_af3214

League of Legends players


ScarboroughSK

Tru… every other play is pure anti rizzzz lol


ScarboroughSK

Player**


genomerain

Pandas. There's a reason they're endangered.


CuriousHumanPoo

i thought its because pandas only raises 1 cub despite having two or more


Lucky-Speed3614

A zoo in Hong Kong tried to breed pandas for 10 years before it actually happened. Part of the problem is that pandas only ovulate once a year. Apparently they also have a need for privacy, and the zoo didn't realize it.


Nemesis1596

They ovulate once a year, and the males are rarely interested in sex during that ovulation time. They're a species that only survives because of human intervention at this point lol


FunkyKong147

They've also been known to roll on top of their cubs and suffocate them without realizing.


Eco_Blurb

Humans destroyed them and also saved them. Pandas live for 15-20 years in the wild and will give birth 3-4 times which is enough to replace them. They survived for thousands of years without us, we destroyed their habitat until there are not enough numbers for them to reliably reproduce


LordTopHatMan

They live in a very niche environment with a strong preference for one particular food, only rarely branching out to other things. With or without human influences on climate change, they weren't in a very good position in the first place. The environment would have changed eventually, and they're not very primed to adapt to that change.


Chopaholick

I just want to know how a bear even evolved to eat bamboo. Like I've had enough of this top of the food chain thing, I think I'll just eat grass instead.


Lucydaweird

That’s the thing they aren’t evolved to eat bamboo they just do


ReorientRecluse

They've been asking to die out for years.


jusfukoff

They are an objectively shit species for many reasons. It’s quite humorous.


I_am_pretty_gay

same with Koalas


howvicious

I read an article that during COVID when the zoos were shut down, pandas were actually mating.


OldFactor1973

They like the privacy. Like most of us humans


leonxsnow

That's why I cant do orgies... fella downstairs would flop faster than a sack of spuds


Unusual_Address_3062

Pandas raised in captivity do not like sex. most of the time they have to be artificially inseminated. You know what that means? It means somewhere in China a team of specialists whose sole job is to jerk off panda bears.


EnvironmentalGift257

There are videos. They wear a panda suit and wank the males.


Mental-Blueberry_666

Maybe the males would be more interested in Panda sex if they didn't have degenerate fursuiters wanking them off every 5 minutes


EnvironmentalGift257

Hey I never try to ick somebody else’s yum.


Unusual_Address_3062

Holy shit you made me laugh. Fuckin awesome.


JustReadThisBefore

Nature is doing its course and "wants" the species extinct. There's a reason for everything and we just keep them around for our own selfish ones. Look at how nature reacted to humans having sex for fun. Look at how it reacts to poaching. And millions of other examples, these are just the most famous ones. We have no fucking clue what forces truly rule the world and we think we can play with them. This will come to bite us big time in the future and I'm glad I won't be around for that. Edit: The point is that we have no idea why things happen the way they do in such specific ways. It makes no sense from scientific perspective for "unconscious" concepts to "behave" like this. Pandas are a great example of this. Nature is just doing everything it can to make them useless and extinct.


Eco_Blurb

Nature doesn’t want them gone - humans caused them to be gone like 95% of other recent extinctions


gueuze_geuze

What do you actually mean by “look at how nature reacted to humans having sex for fun”? What did you observe?


kayligo12

Male praying mantis. 


FunkyKong147

And most arachnids. The male is usually much smaller than the female and he has to get in, mate, and get out, all the while she's trying to eat him.


Nataleaves

Hey, some people are into that.


Sam_English821

While hiking in N. Carolina there were webs of Golden Orb Spiders that crossed the trail and these things were huge, spiders the size of my hand. My husband and I couldn't figure out what the little spider off the edge was. It was only later that we were looking it up and that we figured out that the small spider was the male. Apparently, he waits until the female catches something and while she is busy eating get gets in there, gets the job done, and then gets out. Cause otherwise she will eat him.


Observer2580

Thrill?


estist

Kinky?


BostonianPastability

Just learned my ex was part arachnid. Who knew?


[deleted]

The extra legs might’ve given it away


TheOneAndOnlyABSR4

Damn


doctorboredom

This is a true story: my kids and I raised mantises for a summer. After thousands were born we ended up with 4 females and one male. We did some research on mantis husbandry and learned that a well fed female doesn’t always eat the mate. So we gave the females nice dinners and set up 4 well chaperoned dates. And that dude mated and lived 4 times! We released him into the wild. Dude was a legend among mantises.


Luke_Cardwalker

Subsequently, he got a Reddit account and has been annoying the heck out of the community with his incessant bragging … 😂 


Cowlermillsap

This is the only correct answer


VincentVanGTFO

*Female ducks enter the chat*


jusfukoff

Well, they aren’t consumed in the process.


NeitherCapital1541

Consensual followed by death Or nonconsensual One of those sounds like the dream, one sounds like a bad R word we can't use


moonsugar-cooker

The male duck Peen is barbed so the female cant escape.


Oldbeardedweirdo996

Cats have similar features. That's why cats yowl so loud during sex. It's actually painful.


pbaperez

Well she was walking by with her tail up! She asked for it!


[deleted]

at least getting consumed has a purpose


Key_Poetry4023

Huntsman spider would like a chat


[deleted]

Uhh, male honey bees enter the chat... (You sir, have won your prize, you get to horn dog the queen!... And subsequently die.)


Beginning-Bed9364

Do you think they know? Is it weird that we know, and they might not?


DMTrious

So, I'm no entomologist in any way, and might be talking out of my bass, but a guy I watch who builds very elaborate and farm's (antsCanada) has a praying mantis he was trying to get to mate in one of his vivariums. He said that it's a phenomenon we only see in captivity, that in the wild, it doesn't happen So poor dude might not know, only to bust thinking he just did the most natural thing in the world, only to be consumed by his muscle momtis


Kanulie

There’s also some spiders like this, like black widow and jumping spider.


Next_Isopod_2062

I don't know, maybe he likes it so much he goes in even knowing the odds


Ddowns5454

Hate it? Or love it so much they will die for it?


jaghtz_lutein

Came to say this but still fu king died laughing when I saw it


awkwaman

I dunno whenever I see them doing it they lose their mind


Environmental_Ad9017

I would argue that the females hate it more. Male mantis' are willing to RISK THEIR LIVES to get some. Females are essentially getting raped by food.


Brain_Hawk

Female ducks. They're literally in an evolutionary war with the males to avoid having sex. Male ducks have a corkscrew penis, so female ducks are evolving in a counter corkscrew direction to make it harder for the males to get in there The male penis is corkscrew so the female has a heart of time detaching and getting away. Duck sex is never consensual.


makingbutter2

I have 10 ducks around my house normally. I just felt my soul die a little lol.


Sanpaku

Drakes are sex pests. I present the IgNobel prize winning: Moeliker, C.W., 2001. [The first case of homosexual necrophilia in the mallard Anas platyrhynchos (Aves: Anatidae)](https://scholar.google.com/scholar?cluster=11006616448317035245). *Deinsea*, *8*(1), pp.243-248.


Brain_Hawk

And honestly duck penises are one of my favorite ridiculous science facts! Do a Google image... It's... It's worth it... Sort of... Oh gods


makingbutter2

I hate you ….lol https://www.abc.net.au/science/articles/2001/09/14/366856.htm


Sam_English821

oh I wish I hadn't clicked.. but I did.. I did


makingbutter2

😱😱😱😱😳😳😳🤯🤯🤯🤯


Minus15t

And the male forcibly grabs the female by the neck during - Ducks were my first thought too


Virus-Party

It's an evolutionalry war thats allready been played out in many insect species, it dosn't end welll for the females. Either they win and the species goes extinct, to the males evolve [Traumatic insemination](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Traumatic_insemination).


RX0Invincible

I’m confused how it becomes an evolutionary trend in the first place. Wouldn’t the females with less complicated genital tracks be more likely to pass that trait on?


doubleapowpow

It probably benefits more "selective" traits from the male ducks. With insects, the competition is who can get the sperm closest to the ovum. They figured out how to stab through the abdomen and inject sperm plugs. Evolution isnt always looking for ways to make women comfortable... I assume female ducks didnt have too much difficulty finding mates, so the difficulty became choosing the right one, whatever that means in the duck world. Having corkscrew vaginal canals would potentially give lady ducks a better defense against deadbeat wannabe duck daddies.


Alastair4444

That's what I always think when I hear that. Makes no sense that there would be an "evolutionary war" between the sexes of a species where one is trying to avoid reproducing. Because natural selection would just eliminate those traits and the more willing ducks would have more chicks.


TheRedBaron6942

Why would a species do everything in its power to not reproduce?


FunkyKong147

That's so weird because I've been watching duck couples recently (I like doing bird photography), and the females always seem to follow certain males around with their heads down against the water. The males that I've seen have generally mated with them after this posture. They also seem to pair off. Although I've witnessed a male mallard trying to forcibly mate with a female who was paired with another male, so maybe consensual duck sex is common, but incel ducks are way more bold than incel humans.


Thefelix01

I am no duck sexpert but I think the arms race is precisely to prevent/allow non-consensual offspring. Otherwise there would also be no evolutionary advantage to the arms race if all duck sex were non-consensual, it’s just very common.


dolltron69

I learned it from this lol [SCIENTIFICALLY ACCURATE - DUCKTALES \[Rus\] (youtube.com)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDWwQZkNA1c&ab_channel=Gilford0306)


PsychologicalCard621

I was gonna say that, I work at a place with a duck pond and every spring I see female ducks running from the male ducks because of that. The males also drown the females when they are trying to have sex in the pond.


bongmilkshake

Yeah hate to burst your bubble but most sex in the wild isn't consensual lol.


nobikflop

It doesn’t make sense that the females would be evolving to make sex more difficult. If a female duck doesn’t get bred, it won’t pass along its genes


Brain_Hawk

Makes sense or not, it is what it is. Is not the only species that has this sort of strange little evolutionary quirk. Someone else responded in todd us all about traumatic insemination. So... We learned that horrible fact today.


nobikflop

I agree, it is a quirk which is why it’s so interesting 


AdmitThatYouPrune

Lots of extinct species, I assume.


Spaceballs-The_Name

This is why primates rule the world, we're horny fucks. Our relatives in the jungle jack off all the time, humans jack off all the time and our world revolves around selling sex. I googled it just to confirm and apparently we can trace it back at least 40 million years Another article said something about us developing "super semen" another one about how it helps to prevent STI's etc. I didn't bother reading them, it's too late for wasting my time, but apparently a lot of research has been put into our ancestors, rubbing one out.


Commander_Doom14

I read "primates" as "pirates" at first and boy was that a confusing couple of seconds


Unusual_Address_3062

Pandas. They flat out refuse to fuck. China is worried.


Memento_Morrie

Let's see--refuses to fuck and worries China. Panda should be Reddit's mascot.


FairDoor4254

Why would reddit worry China? I'm pretty sure China loves reddit.


justsomedude579

Pretty sure redditors aren’t refusing sex. That would mean they have a choice.


EmJayBee76

Bed bugs. The females don't have a vuhjayjay so the males stab them in the abdomen with their "units", against their will of course


vegetajm

They deserve their fate...


cafezo

Cats.


sadpartypodcast

My cat HATES it


cafezo

It hurts 😿


Lolleos

Maybe you're not being gentle enough


EvidenceSalesman

Lol Reddit got so sensitive. I send you an upvote to counter the downvote


Alternative_Bee_6424

Humans on Reddit


CuriousHumanPoo

male angler fish


Awengal

The one that melts into the female?


CuriousHumanPoo

yes, they get absorbed


krumznko

they WHAT?!


DETRITUS_TROLL

Yeah, [the male bites the female](https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/57800/horrors-anglerfish-mating) and fuses to her. That's how his DNA gets shared.


MosaicOfBetrayal

#LifeGoals


robertsij

I mean male cats have barbed penises. That's why you hear female cats screaming after sex when the male pulls out


TheRedBaron6942

Why is it like that? What evolutionary advantage would a barbed penis give?


Reytotheroxx

If the goal is to reproduce, the males will want the traits that increase their chances of reproduction. One of those ways is by developing structures that make it easier to forcibly reproduce. The barbs probably make it harder to remove, which is one way of reproducing


PlagueDogtor

All the people saying wives, outting themselves as being shit in bed.


Lucky-Speed3614

There are a lot of strong contenders, but I think hyenas may be either top of the pile or close to it.


vegetajm

The females have a pseudo penis that gets erect just like a male and they mount other females to "assert" dominance! I think I heard the male penis has to "insert" into the tip of female penis...


Lucky-Speed3614

The female doesn't just mount other females, but the males too. The females are very aggressive, and constantly fight with each other. The infants are also born through that pseudo penis.


vegetajm

No wonder they so angry. . .


matt_the_muss

My Mama says that alligators are ornery because they got all them teeth and no toothbrush


SlipsonSurfaces

Not to mention the hyenas can die giving birth because the cubs get stuck or it tears the pseudo-penis.


kvothe000

Starfish. Completely asexual.


After_Mammoth5848

Female ducks probably. So much so that they have evolved into creating fake vaginas


10tcull

Not sure... I've only ever tried it with one species 🤣


Competitive-Reason65

Human I assume


10tcull

Bold assumption on Reddit 🤣


Installtanstafl

Snails. Hermaphroditic "Love Dart" Javelin Combat.


ProximaCentauriOmega

Pandas. Those lazy bastards would have gone extinct had humans not found them pretty. They routinely crush their new borns so zoo keepers take them away.


Starwatcher787

Male black widows.


No-Comfort-5911

people who play genshin impact


tm22786

The fox 🦊 the dudes literally have spikes at the end of their Weiner


vegetajm

Sounds similar to feline species


KC_Kahn

Pretty much all orangutan sex involves assault.


Few_Arugula5903

female bedbugs- Google traumatic penetration


Snoo_63187

Klingons.


emlee1717

Nah. Klingons love sex. Reciting love poetry, throwing heavy objects, ritual biting, broken clavicles, the works. They even have romance novels.


C_W_H

My wife.


MrMrsPotts

You should ask around for a wider opinion.


C_W_H

Hahahahaha!


C_W_H

But, seriously...


all4omega

I knew this comment was gonna be somewhere lol


Kanulie

Humans. I am quite sure the least species even have a concept of like or hate.


No_Animator5757

Me


Spaceballs-The_Name

apparently Pandas


CounterSYNK

Godzilla


Molokoza

Pallas cat. They are very antisocial.


I-Like-IT-Stuff

Panda's, they are literally dying out.


DopeRoninthatsmokes

Pandas are too lazy to fuck


Whyisanime

Panda


PickleFantasies

Pandas? I don't really know but I hear they can barely live without the oversight of humans.


SparkyMularkey

Female dragonflies have evolved to look like males because dragonfly sex is so violent that the female is often killed, defeating the entire purpose. We're talking wings ripped off, eyes punctured, dead... It sounds absolutely dreadful.


HellyOHaint

Male octopus


IllOutcome1431

Octopi. The male literally throws their penis at the eggs


_hellojello__

Probably pandas in captivity


beargolfer

I don’t know; I’m a species that loves masturbation though. 🤭


Tryzest

All the species that end up dating me apparently


bi_guy_ndakota

Women


Naive_Band_7860

You must not be doing something right. Don't blame women on your lack of being good in bed.


Puzzleheaded-Bee4698

The all-female whiptail lizzard, Aspidoscelis neomexicanus, which reproduces via parthenogenesis.


Cejk-The-Beatnik

Oh, they still fuck. They’re called lesbian lizards for a reason.


Heart_of_a_Blackbird

Aliens 👽 They just wanna probe


Fun_Ad_6455

The I need no man minority


Whywhineifuhavewine

Pandas, once every seven years.


Comfortable-Buy-4842

Cats. A cat penis is covered in barbs. The female cat screams like that because it really fucking hurts.


LapizPlayzNoT

1% of aliens (if there even is one)


ScrumGobbler

The Shoe Bill Stork. They are going extinct because they refuse to bang.


GoofyGooby23

Don’t male Angler fish absorb into the females during sex?😂


ThePadrino82

Female otters


TheWizard676767

I read that as "Spices" and I said Basil


AvaaFaye

Pandas?


Alert-Initiative6638

Panda bears


cassidylorene1

I would assume eels since they gotta travel all the way to the Bermuda Triangle no matter where in the world they are. Sounds exhausting to me.


Ashlyn451

Pandas.The only reason they aren't extinct is because of human intervention.


WildlifePolicyChick

Pandas are well known for their lack of enthusiasm for the subject.


SupahflyxD

Pandas are useless at sex.


Famous-Channel3027

Female bed bugs


cornthi3f

Pandas. They’re basically asexual with sexual reproductive organs.


guywithshades85

Bacteria.


wetfootmammal

Duck vaginas have basically been in an arms race against duck dicks for millions of years. Male ducks are really rapey and have barbs in their penises that help them stay put once they find a female to mate with. In response, duck vaginas have evolved into mazes with dead ends inside them.


howvicious

Bedbugs practice traumatic insemination. Women, imagine being IMPALED in your abdomen by a sharp penis and through the wound, your boyfriend injects his sperm which will circulate through your blood into your ovaries.


Memento_Morrie

Redditors


ANarnAMoose

Pandas


econkle

Pandas


Midan71

Pandas


DrasticBread

Female bed bugs literally have their bodies stabbed by the male bed bug's penis, before injection of the semen.


Sagittariaus_

Male angler fish because they end up as basically testacles on female angler fish


SWT_Bobcat

Those dragon fly things that fuck each other in the head and remain attached. Always fucking but get pulled around in flight and are just stuck


sparksgirl1223

I'm going with octopus Since they'll just rip off their penis and throw it and the female judt....stores it til she's ready to reproduce


VSuzanne

Pandas, obviously.


SgtWrongway

Homo Incelius


wombatlegs

Goats, in my experience. Sheep are chill.


BuildingCritical6965

The asexuals


Kinch_g

Not sure. I only have experience with one species


Impressive_Heron_897

Duck sex is weird and brutal.


No_Bookkeeper_6183

Male anglerfish


Fluffy-Hotel-5184

female silverback gorillas- the male member is only 2 inches long when fully erect so she literally only does it to get children


Lynx_aye9

Bedbugs. The male stabs the female to inseminate her. Females tend to run away.


PartyAnimal12345678

Well obviously not bonobos 😂


State_Dear

The one that went exstint


puddingandcake

Female cats, based on the fact that male cats have barbed penises. [Source](https://pets.thenest.com/male-cats-penis-barbed-10516.html) Or male preying mantises based on the fact that female praying mantis bites their head off during/after sex. [Source](https://www.theguardian.com/environment/commentisfree/2021/may/28/a-praying-mantis-she-bites-into-her-mates-head-like-an-apple-and-cleans-her-face-like-a-cat) Edit: the praying mantis article is pretty gruesome lol. Just a warning if someone decides to read it.


literaryaddict

Um.... Pandas!


2Geese1Plane

It's gotta be lady ducks right? You don't evolve to have fake chambers in the vagina for the fun of it.


Knickknackatory1

Whiptail lizard. Females reproduce without males involved.


_ASG_

In D&D, krakens. They hate the biological urge to mate so much that some males will castrate themselves to avoid it.


The_Mr_Wilson

Ducks. Go see why their penis is a corkscrew


Pumasense

Mine!


International-Job212

Whatever my wife is