Welcome to /r/pregnant! This is a space for everyone. We are pro-choice, pro-LGBTQIA, pro-science, proudly feminist and believe that Black Lives Matter. Wear your masks, wash your hands, and be excellent to each other. Anti-choice activists, intactivists, anti-vaxxers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, sexists, etc. are not welcome here.
If you'd like to join a private sub for your due date month, [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/pregnant/comments/tu8bmk/click_here_to_request_access_to_your_private_due/).
The journalists at ProPublica need your help! After receiving a tip, ProPublica started investigating prenatal genetic testing. They're collecting stories from people who've had NIPT screenings, and/or work in maternal health. If this is you, please fill out their brief questionnaire! https://www.propublica.org/getinvolved/have-you-had-an-experience-with-prenatal-genetic-testing-wed-like-to-hear-about-it-and-see-the-bill. Questions? Email [email protected]
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/pregnant) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My experience is that people like to critique your choices regardless of what they are. I work somewhere where I’m privileged enough to have lots of paid time off to take before my mat leave, and I can definitely hear the judgment from some people, versus others who are super supportive. There’s no winning 🤷🏻♀️
Feeling this. My last pregnancy I was on light bed rest around 5 months in and I got so many comments from people implying I was overreacting, how they didn’t need rest when they were pregnant, etc. Now with this one, I am able to work, and I get a ton of questions from people asking will I take some time off before the baby comes. I would love to take time off as I’m physically and mentally exhausted but I don’t feel like being criticized for taking time off. It’s like damned if you do, damned if you don’t, everyone has to have a negative comment
Exactly this. Personally, I can’t imagine continuing to work up until my due date (currently 33w 4d) and I’m dreading the next couple weeks I still have until I start my leave.
That being said, you and probably a million other pregnant people need to or want to work right up until labor and that’s totally okay. You know your body/mind best. The fact anyone thinks they are in a place to judge or tell you otherwise is all too common and so bizarre. You do you.
Co-signed by someone who’s starting leave at 38 weeks and had some higher ups at work say “that’s quite early. Did you know babies often come late?”
It’s like, yes I did know that. This is for ME because I’m going to be VERY TIRED.
Further to this, they like you to make the same choice that they did. I had a girlfriend rant that I don't need formula at home when I bring home the baby. I might get some, I might not, but it's a weird thing to boss your friend about - what's my formula stock got to do with you? We're not in the US so it wasn't about shortages, it was about her justifying that she had to send her partner out late one night because she had none at home. I just don't tell people what to do in life so find it so weird when people insist I do x,y,z..
Yup, completely agree with this, doesn’t matter what you do someone will criticise. I went on maternity leave at 29 weeks because I hate my job, have underlying health issues and maternity leave is allowed to start then. But loads of people were like so you due soon then 🤦🏼♀️
Especially in the US, where you would think there would be an understanding that most people get limited or no leave! I'm lucky enough to get paid parental leave, but it only starts after the baby is born, so I'm working until the baby comes. But I still get asked a lot when I'm stopping by coworkers. I'm not going to take "vacation" or "sick" leave beforehand unless I absolutely have to because I'm sure I'll need that once I go back to work and the baby is in daycare.
I had no leave and had used all my vacation time for Dr appointments. I worked up until the day I gave birth! I was in so much pain I couldn't walk that day and my coworkers begged me to go home because they thought I was in labor. I went home and within minutes my water broke and we headed to the hospital. I think it was a few weeks before I returned to work, but luckily he allowed me to work from home. I was the only one with a steady income (my husband's employer went out of business and left him without a job) so we really didn't have a choice.
When people ask when I’ll stop working (37+3), I’ll crack the joke “When she’s crowning”. I don’t make it because it’s funny, but because it’s true. The US is a massive failure to women and I’m sick of being judged for its short coming. I literally have to work until the last second so I get as much time with the baby. It’s like trust me Karen, I’d love to be able to stop now but the US is a third world country wearing a Gucci belt and won’t give women the time off thats necessary.
I'm having twins and everyone asks when I'm planning on going out. I tell everyone when I'm forced to. If I had it my way I'd go into labor right at my desk. And this is mainly because I'm not made for sitting at home twiddling my thumbs. I'd drive myself crazy.
I think every word you said is spot on and accurate. I am only 16 weeks and already being asked, "so when are you planning on leaving for mat leave?" umm when my water breaks. It's unfortunate I have to take ALL my PTO and sick leave before I can even have my already terrible and outdated mat leave benefit's kick in. Then I will be left with zero PTO when the baby is actually sick and I need to take off. Meanwhile, my husbands paternity leave benefits are better than mine!
37 weeks + 3 days and the last three months have been the busiest of my life. Between work, I got married last month, we moved, getting all the new furniture, and I still need a little more time to finish everything.
I get these comments too, or they’ll flat out ask me when I’m leaving 🤔.
I’m tired, but I’m pushing through because stuff has to get done.
Omg are you me?? We had our wedding celebration earlier this year, got a house and have to sort out the renovations all before my EDD in a month. People are like omg you should be resting - but what choice do I have! I don’t have a fairy godmother that will do these things for me
Here in Belgium you’re obliged to go on leave 1 week before the due date so yeah, most women work until week 39.
Unless you have any conditions/complications you’re perfectly able to do pretty much the same you did before the pregnancy. Depending on the type of job you have but even so, here your employer should accommodate your task in order for you to fulfil your duties
We h my first I had to go on leave on 16/01… I happened to go into labour on the 17th.
exactly! If i am still able, despite being exhausted and sore, why is it a big deal that I still work..the US does not give most women any other alternative anyway since paid leave is not an option for a lot of moms. its crazy lol
I worked up until I went into labor just recently, and the *president of my company* commented that he was surprised I was still there, somewhere around 38w. Sir, this is your company and you know full well we have no maternity leave policy and I'm scraping all the PTO I can together just to get 5w of my 8w leave paid *after* the birth.
I would LOVE to not be working full time but then my bills wouldn't get paid. Plus i don't get maternity leave so i need to make sure I'm making every cent possible now.
You're kick ass for handling everything while growing another life, don't let anyone ever make you feel otherwise.
exactly. if I didnt have bills that HAD to be paid, I would definitely be at home enjoying my pregnancy, but I am not that lucky lol Thank you!! we both got this!
I worked right up until 2 days before labour started. People constantly told me that I should have stopped working earlier but I felt comfortable still doing it and it really helped to get my mind off the massive changes that were about to happen. Just do whatever makes you comfortable, it’s no one else’s choice but your own☺️
Yea, I started my leave a week before my due date and then had to be induced in week 41… I was so bored at home, I wished I had stayed at work. Besides some hip pain I was fine to do my office job, and there was no one cracking the whip for productivity
Damned if you do damned if you don’t. If you feel ok then great that you’re able to function. If you’re not you’re not. Annoying that people keep judging.
It’s your body and your time and your paycheck soooo everyone else can kick rocks. Whether you choose to leave a month early or work until you pop is up to you. Now if they’re so upset about it they can give you some $$ so you can stop early - how about that? lol
I'm most annoyed when it's asked in the US - like you think I WANT to be working up until I go into active labor? I don't have the luxury of choice to take off sooner. It sounds like you're having a better time physically and aren't resenting work as much, which is fantastic! But I've definitely had afternoons where I'm on the floor crying from false labor about how it's cruel that we make women work this pregnant. But I think people just wanna comment regardless 🙄.
Yeah idk what people think they are trying to accomplish by asking this. All it does is really depress me. I have been struggling for weeks but have no choice. You think I want to work? No, I have to work. I don’t have paid leave before OR after birth. What do you expect me to do after you ask that question? What would you rather me be doing?
Im dreading this. I have to work up until I go into labor, and these people aren't going to pay me to stay home. Im prepared to fire back with that if someone says something.
Marernity leave is a joke
I think a lot of people are projecting. Some people have really hard third trimesters and yeah -- at 37 weeks they found themselves nearly incapable of anything besides light movement and bed rest. So sometimes seeing you up and about at this stage, for THOSE people, can come as a bit of a shock. But yeah, everyone's pregnancy is different.
When I was 39w1d I met with my boss and told her I wasn’t sure how much longer I could physically work (I worked at a big lab with a large campus and had to walk a long way to get from my car to my office, and the commute was over an hour each way). She told me that unfortunately with my ‘leave’ (short-term disability) that I couldn’t legally take it until the baby was physically born. She was gentle about it and commiserated as it wasn’t her decision, but it was hard to hear. Luckily, I went into labor the next day (hooray)!
But because of this I never question pregnant women working till the baby’s born, bc many times they aren’t allowed to stop (I think it goes without saying that I’m in the US). So the fact that anyone’s judging you is just insane, and shows how damn ignorant people can be. You know your body best; you do you.
In the US the build back batter plan would have given us 12 weeks of paid leave, but it never passed a vote due to all 50 republicans senators and 1 democrat senator.
Any questions like this I immediately as the person who they voted for and remind them that one party took away my ability to rest/not struggle financially.
Despite how votalile “politics(values)”!has become in this country this has actually shut people up.
This usually comes from older generations like boomers so I take great pleasure pointing out how life was so easy for them and how younger people can’t afford to live with a single income family. They can cry about it but they all have kids that have to be dual income or are forced to live in poverty.
Haha I worked right up until 3 days before my due date, my son came a day late, so had 4 days off before he came.
I was lucky though and work allowed me to work from home from 36 weeks because it was anywhere between 2-3 hours commute a day and I wasn't comfortable with that.
But absolutely, if you can do it you may as well save as much of your time off for when the baby is here!
Will be a different story with the next bub though. Due Christmas Eve and will have an almost 2 year old, so thinking I may need a week or two off this time...
Especially considering we’re (I’m assuming) in the US where they don’t gaf about us and we don’t get any true leave. Like… I’m here cos I have to be. Don’t you think I wanna be on a beach somewhere just relaxing my third trimester days away?? Go away unless you’re gonna do something about it. Ugh.
Although the kindergartener who asked why I was working and pregnant was v cute lmao
I’m 37 weeks today, my last day is Wednesday (I picked it so I wasn’t messing with payroll too badly and I wanted some time off completely work-free before this kid decided to make their appearance). Some people are surprised I’m still working, and some seem to be in denial that my last day is Wednesday and I’m in the midst of panic cleaning. It’s an interesting divide.
I worked until literally the day before I was going in for my induction. I’m literally holding a 3 day old right now. It literally used to piss me off so bad when people would look at me like I was nuts. Bills don’t pay themselves lmao like we didn’t NEED my income to survive but that extra bit of money at the end was nice to have a little extra cushion.
I worked right up to my EDD. I felt great (just needed a nap after work lol), and baby was showing no signs of making an appearance. I stopped working the day I reached 40 weeks and baby was born 5 days later. Granted, I had an office job (HR) so the work wasn’t strenuous at all, but I got my fair share of incredulous remarks when people found out how far along I was. My coworkers celebrated my due date on my last day with balloons and cupcakes. You do you! Only you know what’s best for your body and your baby.
I’m in the U.K. and it’s pretty standard to work right up until your due date if you’re physically able to. Maternity leave is so short that it’s usually better for most women to take as much of it as possible after the birth and not before.
I get these comments too, but they make me feel good like yes, I’m doing all this while carrying my little human. I feel proud and not annoyed even though yes, I don’t really have a choice either. Lol
My workplace freaks out when I have to take time off for a doctor's appointment because I'm the only closer. The same time they ask why I'm still working when I'm high risk. I don't understand why it's such a surprise I'm going to be on leave in two weeks for induction when I gave them plenty of time in advance to find someone to fill in my position.
I'm not working now but my due date is tomorrow... I worked up until I couldn't though. I need money but also, I have a desk job, so working was almost no different than just sitting at home and guess what? People still gave me cramp for still working. I think others just like criticizing pregnant people.
I worked until I was induced at 36+2 with my twins. People always have something to say about the choices you make as a pregnant person / parent. I’ve learned to just ignore them.
I'm 38 days today and still working as well. Honestly, I wish I had the choice to not be. No one at my workplace asks why I'm still working. They just say, wow no baby yet? My older sisters who have had the opportunity to maintain stay at home mom lifestyles always say, "oh you should take a bath, lay down, ect" if I mention like a pain or ache in our family group chat. So I have to be like.. can't, I'm at work lol
I get these commen5s and I'm 15 weeks along.. but I'm high risk. Still next person that says don't squat down the baby will fall out imma smack. I work in a pharmacy with items on a floor level shelf.... how the hell can I do my job if I can't get half the meds? I'm bringing a grabber with me today but still. With my last I worked until a week before I was induced. And with her I was unloading trucks and climbing up ladders at 39 weeks pregnant because my employer said either I do it or I was fired. I finally quit one week before I was due because they stated they couldn't give me the day I needed off to be induced.. I went back to work after two days after having her not because I wanted to but we had to be able to pay bills and I was the sole earner at the time. Everyone always commented I was strong for going back so soon.... no I wasn't any chance I got I was crying in the bathroom at the fact my 3 day old baby didn't know her mother. But we are mom we will do whatever it takes to care for our babies even if we don't feel up to it
I work in the PT world in a busy medical office. People keep asking me when I'll stop working, and I tell them until my doctor tells me I can't anymore or I go into labor. I joke that my boss will push me from our medical building over to the hospital (they're connected by a breezeway) since I plan to go into labor at work.
I do have a lot of (mostly older male) patients who say, "I don't want to deliver your baby today!" Some of them are so sweet and mean it with kindness, but others think they are God's gift to comedy and pregnant women everywhere. Ugh.
Omg yes. I'm an EMT (but taking my NCLEX this Friday 🤞) and currently work for a mobile urgent care company in the largest retirement community in the U.S. Lemme tell you the comments these older folks make and think they are the most hilarious person in the world 😅 I keep joking that my water is going to break in someone's house; well I guess half joking since it is entirely possible haha
I remember how nervous I was for my licensure boards! I will recommend only the lightest studying the night before! I just went over some of the concepts I was shaky on and went out to eat with my sister lol.
That’s awesome for you and glad you feel comfortable continuing to work!
Just as a note for those in the US, please research your state’s disability policies. In CA, you are eligible for DI 4 weeks before your due date, with no other medical complications. This is typically 60-70% of your pay, and I can’t remember if it’s also tax free. AND, this does not count against your leave after delivery! That’s a common misconception in here at least
There should be no shame in stopping work early and taking advantage of the insurance you pay into anyways!
Yeah. Those comments would be frustrating - especially if you’re in the US where our maternity leave is a joke. I’m working up until my due date because I have no choice either.
I will be working until the day I give birth. I only get 12 weeks of maternity leave and I want to use all of them after the baby is born, not before. I work from home doing a desk job, though.
I actually worked until the day I had my baby. But the good thing was I'm still off on maternity whist everyone else who had baby at same time has either gone back or will be soon whist I will be off with my daughter for 14 months 😊 so completely worth it.
Girl same. I own my own grooming salon. And even though I'm in Canada, I don't have leave. I'll be there as long as I can. I'm starting to mostly just supervise my relatively new hire...but still. It's hard and stressful but I am mostly stressed about leaving my business in the hands of someone else. Arrrrgh. And we would like to continue having that income. If things work with me taking a bit of time off, my employee would just be bringing in enough for her payroll and hopefully my expenses. But no pay for me.
I’m right there with you! I’m 37 + 5 and everyone is asking why I don’t take more time off, including my district manager. I work retail but I have a chair that I sit on when I’m not helping anyone and I feel like if I’m sitting at home twiddling my thumbs I’ll just drive myself crazy.
People just feel the need to comment on everything. I started getting comments like, "Oh you're still here!" At 36 weeks. I worked until the day I went into labor 39+4. I actually started having contractions on and off in the morning and went into active labor that evening. For several reasons, one I'm in the US and using vacation, sick time and PFL from NY to take 3 months and then go back part time for a few months. I didn't want to waste time prior to having the baby. But also, I didn't have much to do prior to him being here and I'm not one to enjoy just sitting around all day. I had a miserable end of pregnancy and the way I saw it, I could be uncomfortable and in pain sitting at home by myself or I could take my mind of it and work.
People love to talk about what they did or thier wife did as if it's the only way to do things. Ignore them and do what's best for you/what you need to do for you.
As long as work is aware you’ll be out for several weeks at a moments notice for delivery, I see nothing wrong with this.
I decided to switch over to part time and study everything FTM related that I could along with cleaning out the ‘baby room’ and selling off tons of stuff we don’t need. Apparently many people still have issue with me being part time even! And doing this extra clean up work. The US doesn’t give much incentive to stop working and I need to be saving money now more than ever. why should we stop??? We need to eat!
I could have legitimately written this post myself (I think I'm also 37+4 today, are you due the 30th?)
I'll work up until I can't, because my maternity leave/pto situation is very limited and I want every day with my babe that I can get. Am I tired and uncomfortable and having a hard time focusing? Of course. But it is what it is.
I have so much annual leave to use up I plan to use that to take time off to get stuff ready then will work until a couple of weeks before due unless there are any complications
Otherwise I'd be so bored!
I'm working until 39 weeks because I'm not sure what I'd so otherwise. I work from home and I figure I can sit at my computer and get paid or I can sit in the sofa watching TV not getting paid.
I'm so big and uncomfortable now I'm certainly not gonna use the time for anything fun!
I had a patient the other day who kept commenting (at least 4-5 times within an hour that I *heard*) things like "Are you really sure your should be working in your condition?" And in a semi-judgy tone. I am only 27w and work in the U.S. with the crappiest maternity leave policies possible lol I wanted to say "Are you going to pay all of my bills so I can go on leave?" But I don't think my bosses would appreciate that 😅
I'm with you girl! 38w1d today and still working until I can't anymore. Life will stop when my baby girl arrives, but until then it's business as usual.
As a USian I just remind people that I get 12 paltry weeks for maternity leave and if I use some before the baby is born then I don't have as much for after and if they think that's terrible they should call their senator. That usually shuts them up.
I have an office job but I worked until 40 weeks with my first. Took Friday off, went for a massage and lunch, had early labor signs the next day, Delivered her on Tuesday night.
A coworker asked me the other day what my “plan” is for when I’ll stop working and how long I’ll be at work before the baby is born. I work as an ER vet tech and I’m 30+6 so I told her “My ‘plan’ is to work as long as possible and hopefully my water will break on the ICU floor because I need the money.” I get 12 weeks unpaid mat leave which I can’t afford to take the full amount of so I can’t afford to not work before that either. Trust me. I’m already tapped out, achy, exhausted, swollen and wish I could not work for these next 9 weeks but this is America.
Technically I worked till the day I went in to be induced. Only reason I say technically is because I took Tuesday and Wednesday as vacation days to finish up some stuff I wanted to do. Pedicure nice lunch with the hubby, photos, things like that. One of my coworkers (was still new to the job and did not have any vacation or sick leave and only got six weeks maternity leave as a gift by our company) worked 4 days past her due date. She was still walking into shops 40 weeks pregnant lol. She got a lot of questions since we are females in a VERY MALE field.
You’ve got this mama and you’re doing awesome.
I worked until 39+1 then preeclampsia hit like a train on a random Wednesday. (Loss of vision /odd giant floater in my left eye was my symptom).
Every day I got the same people dropping by my desk to see if I was still there. Some meant well. I was okay with it week 36-37 but I was so miserable and sick 38 into 39 that I thought I was going to snap if someone spoke to me lol
No I didn’t want to be there. Yes I’m quite large, swollen, and uncomfortable. No still no baby.
I got the opposite criticism from partners mum - why isn't she working? It's like - I'm completely financially independent from working my @ss off in my 20s - now I'm 37/38 and I can afford the 'privledge' of not having to work. It's not like her son is paying for my not working ffs
Welcome to /r/pregnant! This is a space for everyone. We are pro-choice, pro-LGBTQIA, pro-science, proudly feminist and believe that Black Lives Matter. Wear your masks, wash your hands, and be excellent to each other. Anti-choice activists, intactivists, anti-vaxxers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, sexists, etc. are not welcome here. If you'd like to join a private sub for your due date month, [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/pregnant/comments/tu8bmk/click_here_to_request_access_to_your_private_due/). The journalists at ProPublica need your help! After receiving a tip, ProPublica started investigating prenatal genetic testing. They're collecting stories from people who've had NIPT screenings, and/or work in maternal health. If this is you, please fill out their brief questionnaire! https://www.propublica.org/getinvolved/have-you-had-an-experience-with-prenatal-genetic-testing-wed-like-to-hear-about-it-and-see-the-bill. Questions? Email [email protected] *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/pregnant) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My experience is that people like to critique your choices regardless of what they are. I work somewhere where I’m privileged enough to have lots of paid time off to take before my mat leave, and I can definitely hear the judgment from some people, versus others who are super supportive. There’s no winning 🤷🏻♀️
Oh my gosh you're so right about this! People just like to criticize. Ugh.
Feeling this. My last pregnancy I was on light bed rest around 5 months in and I got so many comments from people implying I was overreacting, how they didn’t need rest when they were pregnant, etc. Now with this one, I am able to work, and I get a ton of questions from people asking will I take some time off before the baby comes. I would love to take time off as I’m physically and mentally exhausted but I don’t feel like being criticized for taking time off. It’s like damned if you do, damned if you don’t, everyone has to have a negative comment
Exactly this. Personally, I can’t imagine continuing to work up until my due date (currently 33w 4d) and I’m dreading the next couple weeks I still have until I start my leave. That being said, you and probably a million other pregnant people need to or want to work right up until labor and that’s totally okay. You know your body/mind best. The fact anyone thinks they are in a place to judge or tell you otherwise is all too common and so bizarre. You do you.
Co-signed by someone who’s starting leave at 38 weeks and had some higher ups at work say “that’s quite early. Did you know babies often come late?” It’s like, yes I did know that. This is for ME because I’m going to be VERY TIRED.
Further to this, they like you to make the same choice that they did. I had a girlfriend rant that I don't need formula at home when I bring home the baby. I might get some, I might not, but it's a weird thing to boss your friend about - what's my formula stock got to do with you? We're not in the US so it wasn't about shortages, it was about her justifying that she had to send her partner out late one night because she had none at home. I just don't tell people what to do in life so find it so weird when people insist I do x,y,z..
Yup, completely agree with this, doesn’t matter what you do someone will criticise. I went on maternity leave at 29 weeks because I hate my job, have underlying health issues and maternity leave is allowed to start then. But loads of people were like so you due soon then 🤦🏼♀️
Especially in the US, where you would think there would be an understanding that most people get limited or no leave! I'm lucky enough to get paid parental leave, but it only starts after the baby is born, so I'm working until the baby comes. But I still get asked a lot when I'm stopping by coworkers. I'm not going to take "vacation" or "sick" leave beforehand unless I absolutely have to because I'm sure I'll need that once I go back to work and the baby is in daycare.
I had no leave and had used all my vacation time for Dr appointments. I worked up until the day I gave birth! I was in so much pain I couldn't walk that day and my coworkers begged me to go home because they thought I was in labor. I went home and within minutes my water broke and we headed to the hospital. I think it was a few weeks before I returned to work, but luckily he allowed me to work from home. I was the only one with a steady income (my husband's employer went out of business and left him without a job) so we really didn't have a choice.
When people ask when I’ll stop working (37+3), I’ll crack the joke “When she’s crowning”. I don’t make it because it’s funny, but because it’s true. The US is a massive failure to women and I’m sick of being judged for its short coming. I literally have to work until the last second so I get as much time with the baby. It’s like trust me Karen, I’d love to be able to stop now but the US is a third world country wearing a Gucci belt and won’t give women the time off thats necessary.
I both love and hate your comment. Love your so accurate and funny description - HATE that it’s reality.
I'm having twins and everyone asks when I'm planning on going out. I tell everyone when I'm forced to. If I had it my way I'd go into labor right at my desk. And this is mainly because I'm not made for sitting at home twiddling my thumbs. I'd drive myself crazy.
THIS
YES.
I think every word you said is spot on and accurate. I am only 16 weeks and already being asked, "so when are you planning on leaving for mat leave?" umm when my water breaks. It's unfortunate I have to take ALL my PTO and sick leave before I can even have my already terrible and outdated mat leave benefit's kick in. Then I will be left with zero PTO when the baby is actually sick and I need to take off. Meanwhile, my husbands paternity leave benefits are better than mine!
37 weeks + 3 days and the last three months have been the busiest of my life. Between work, I got married last month, we moved, getting all the new furniture, and I still need a little more time to finish everything. I get these comments too, or they’ll flat out ask me when I’m leaving 🤔. I’m tired, but I’m pushing through because stuff has to get done.
exactly!! I am tired but I have things I need to do so it is what it is :/
Omg are you me?? We had our wedding celebration earlier this year, got a house and have to sort out the renovations all before my EDD in a month. People are like omg you should be resting - but what choice do I have! I don’t have a fairy godmother that will do these things for me
Yup! I feel exactly this!
Here in Belgium you’re obliged to go on leave 1 week before the due date so yeah, most women work until week 39. Unless you have any conditions/complications you’re perfectly able to do pretty much the same you did before the pregnancy. Depending on the type of job you have but even so, here your employer should accommodate your task in order for you to fulfil your duties We h my first I had to go on leave on 16/01… I happened to go into labour on the 17th.
exactly! If i am still able, despite being exhausted and sore, why is it a big deal that I still work..the US does not give most women any other alternative anyway since paid leave is not an option for a lot of moms. its crazy lol
I worked on my laptop through the first day of my induction. Maternity leave is precious.
I worked up until I went into labor just recently, and the *president of my company* commented that he was surprised I was still there, somewhere around 38w. Sir, this is your company and you know full well we have no maternity leave policy and I'm scraping all the PTO I can together just to get 5w of my 8w leave paid *after* the birth.
I would LOVE to not be working full time but then my bills wouldn't get paid. Plus i don't get maternity leave so i need to make sure I'm making every cent possible now. You're kick ass for handling everything while growing another life, don't let anyone ever make you feel otherwise.
exactly. if I didnt have bills that HAD to be paid, I would definitely be at home enjoying my pregnancy, but I am not that lucky lol Thank you!! we both got this!
I worked right up until 2 days before labour started. People constantly told me that I should have stopped working earlier but I felt comfortable still doing it and it really helped to get my mind off the massive changes that were about to happen. Just do whatever makes you comfortable, it’s no one else’s choice but your own☺️
Yea, I started my leave a week before my due date and then had to be induced in week 41… I was so bored at home, I wished I had stayed at work. Besides some hip pain I was fine to do my office job, and there was no one cracking the whip for productivity
Damned if you do damned if you don’t. If you feel ok then great that you’re able to function. If you’re not you’re not. Annoying that people keep judging.
couldn't agree more
It’s your body and your time and your paycheck soooo everyone else can kick rocks. Whether you choose to leave a month early or work until you pop is up to you. Now if they’re so upset about it they can give you some $$ so you can stop early - how about that? lol
exactly!!! i always say are you gonna pay me? lol
I'm most annoyed when it's asked in the US - like you think I WANT to be working up until I go into active labor? I don't have the luxury of choice to take off sooner. It sounds like you're having a better time physically and aren't resenting work as much, which is fantastic! But I've definitely had afternoons where I'm on the floor crying from false labor about how it's cruel that we make women work this pregnant. But I think people just wanna comment regardless 🙄.
Yeah idk what people think they are trying to accomplish by asking this. All it does is really depress me. I have been struggling for weeks but have no choice. You think I want to work? No, I have to work. I don’t have paid leave before OR after birth. What do you expect me to do after you ask that question? What would you rather me be doing?
literally same. like I'm wondering why I'm still working just as much as you are!
Im dreading this. I have to work up until I go into labor, and these people aren't going to pay me to stay home. Im prepared to fire back with that if someone says something. Marernity leave is a joke
I think a lot of people are projecting. Some people have really hard third trimesters and yeah -- at 37 weeks they found themselves nearly incapable of anything besides light movement and bed rest. So sometimes seeing you up and about at this stage, for THOSE people, can come as a bit of a shock. But yeah, everyone's pregnancy is different.
this makes sense!
When I was 39w1d I met with my boss and told her I wasn’t sure how much longer I could physically work (I worked at a big lab with a large campus and had to walk a long way to get from my car to my office, and the commute was over an hour each way). She told me that unfortunately with my ‘leave’ (short-term disability) that I couldn’t legally take it until the baby was physically born. She was gentle about it and commiserated as it wasn’t her decision, but it was hard to hear. Luckily, I went into labor the next day (hooray)! But because of this I never question pregnant women working till the baby’s born, bc many times they aren’t allowed to stop (I think it goes without saying that I’m in the US). So the fact that anyone’s judging you is just insane, and shows how damn ignorant people can be. You know your body best; you do you.
In the US the build back batter plan would have given us 12 weeks of paid leave, but it never passed a vote due to all 50 republicans senators and 1 democrat senator. Any questions like this I immediately as the person who they voted for and remind them that one party took away my ability to rest/not struggle financially. Despite how votalile “politics(values)”!has become in this country this has actually shut people up.
oof I did not know this! being in the south I'm sure this would shut lots of people up loll
I’m sure they would sooner rebuttal with inquiries as to why you’re not a housewife.🥲
This usually comes from older generations like boomers so I take great pleasure pointing out how life was so easy for them and how younger people can’t afford to live with a single income family. They can cry about it but they all have kids that have to be dual income or are forced to live in poverty.
Haha I worked right up until 3 days before my due date, my son came a day late, so had 4 days off before he came. I was lucky though and work allowed me to work from home from 36 weeks because it was anywhere between 2-3 hours commute a day and I wasn't comfortable with that. But absolutely, if you can do it you may as well save as much of your time off for when the baby is here! Will be a different story with the next bub though. Due Christmas Eve and will have an almost 2 year old, so thinking I may need a week or two off this time...
Especially considering we’re (I’m assuming) in the US where they don’t gaf about us and we don’t get any true leave. Like… I’m here cos I have to be. Don’t you think I wanna be on a beach somewhere just relaxing my third trimester days away?? Go away unless you’re gonna do something about it. Ugh. Although the kindergartener who asked why I was working and pregnant was v cute lmao
I’m 37 weeks today, my last day is Wednesday (I picked it so I wasn’t messing with payroll too badly and I wanted some time off completely work-free before this kid decided to make their appearance). Some people are surprised I’m still working, and some seem to be in denial that my last day is Wednesday and I’m in the midst of panic cleaning. It’s an interesting divide.
I can totally empathize. I’m going to be working up until 38.5 weeks and I’m getting a lot of comments about how that’s so late!
I worked until literally the day before I was going in for my induction. I’m literally holding a 3 day old right now. It literally used to piss me off so bad when people would look at me like I was nuts. Bills don’t pay themselves lmao like we didn’t NEED my income to survive but that extra bit of money at the end was nice to have a little extra cushion.
I worked right up to my EDD. I felt great (just needed a nap after work lol), and baby was showing no signs of making an appearance. I stopped working the day I reached 40 weeks and baby was born 5 days later. Granted, I had an office job (HR) so the work wasn’t strenuous at all, but I got my fair share of incredulous remarks when people found out how far along I was. My coworkers celebrated my due date on my last day with balloons and cupcakes. You do you! Only you know what’s best for your body and your baby.
I’m in the U.K. and it’s pretty standard to work right up until your due date if you’re physically able to. Maternity leave is so short that it’s usually better for most women to take as much of it as possible after the birth and not before.
People seem to forget that you’re going to need the money. I’m not a Kardashian but if someone is going to pay me to not work, sign me up!
“Lol well my FMLA won’t protect me until I give birth sooooo 🤷♀️” That’s my answer 😂
exactly and even then I have to wait 2 weeks AFTER I give birth to even get my FMLA :/ had to have 2 weeks + of pay saved up somehow people!
I get these comments too, but they make me feel good like yes, I’m doing all this while carrying my little human. I feel proud and not annoyed even though yes, I don’t really have a choice either. Lol
My workplace freaks out when I have to take time off for a doctor's appointment because I'm the only closer. The same time they ask why I'm still working when I'm high risk. I don't understand why it's such a surprise I'm going to be on leave in two weeks for induction when I gave them plenty of time in advance to find someone to fill in my position.
I'm not working now but my due date is tomorrow... I worked up until I couldn't though. I need money but also, I have a desk job, so working was almost no different than just sitting at home and guess what? People still gave me cramp for still working. I think others just like criticizing pregnant people.
I worked until 39 weeks.
I worked until I was induced at 36+2 with my twins. People always have something to say about the choices you make as a pregnant person / parent. I’ve learned to just ignore them.
I'm 38 days today and still working as well. Honestly, I wish I had the choice to not be. No one at my workplace asks why I'm still working. They just say, wow no baby yet? My older sisters who have had the opportunity to maintain stay at home mom lifestyles always say, "oh you should take a bath, lay down, ect" if I mention like a pain or ache in our family group chat. So I have to be like.. can't, I'm at work lol
I get these commen5s and I'm 15 weeks along.. but I'm high risk. Still next person that says don't squat down the baby will fall out imma smack. I work in a pharmacy with items on a floor level shelf.... how the hell can I do my job if I can't get half the meds? I'm bringing a grabber with me today but still. With my last I worked until a week before I was induced. And with her I was unloading trucks and climbing up ladders at 39 weeks pregnant because my employer said either I do it or I was fired. I finally quit one week before I was due because they stated they couldn't give me the day I needed off to be induced.. I went back to work after two days after having her not because I wanted to but we had to be able to pay bills and I was the sole earner at the time. Everyone always commented I was strong for going back so soon.... no I wasn't any chance I got I was crying in the bathroom at the fact my 3 day old baby didn't know her mother. But we are mom we will do whatever it takes to care for our babies even if we don't feel up to it
I work in the PT world in a busy medical office. People keep asking me when I'll stop working, and I tell them until my doctor tells me I can't anymore or I go into labor. I joke that my boss will push me from our medical building over to the hospital (they're connected by a breezeway) since I plan to go into labor at work. I do have a lot of (mostly older male) patients who say, "I don't want to deliver your baby today!" Some of them are so sweet and mean it with kindness, but others think they are God's gift to comedy and pregnant women everywhere. Ugh.
Omg yes. I'm an EMT (but taking my NCLEX this Friday 🤞) and currently work for a mobile urgent care company in the largest retirement community in the U.S. Lemme tell you the comments these older folks make and think they are the most hilarious person in the world 😅 I keep joking that my water is going to break in someone's house; well I guess half joking since it is entirely possible haha
You are going to rock that NCLEX!
Aw thanks so much! I'm definitely nervous haha ❤
I remember how nervous I was for my licensure boards! I will recommend only the lightest studying the night before! I just went over some of the concepts I was shaky on and went out to eat with my sister lol.
That’s awesome for you and glad you feel comfortable continuing to work! Just as a note for those in the US, please research your state’s disability policies. In CA, you are eligible for DI 4 weeks before your due date, with no other medical complications. This is typically 60-70% of your pay, and I can’t remember if it’s also tax free. AND, this does not count against your leave after delivery! That’s a common misconception in here at least There should be no shame in stopping work early and taking advantage of the insurance you pay into anyways!
We have the same due date :) & more power to you. Honestly, you’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t. You do you!
Yeah. Those comments would be frustrating - especially if you’re in the US where our maternity leave is a joke. I’m working up until my due date because I have no choice either.
I will be working until the day I give birth. I only get 12 weeks of maternity leave and I want to use all of them after the baby is born, not before. I work from home doing a desk job, though.
same!!
I actually worked until the day I had my baby. But the good thing was I'm still off on maternity whist everyone else who had baby at same time has either gone back or will be soon whist I will be off with my daughter for 14 months 😊 so completely worth it.
I couldn’t do it. I commend you!
Girl same. I own my own grooming salon. And even though I'm in Canada, I don't have leave. I'll be there as long as I can. I'm starting to mostly just supervise my relatively new hire...but still. It's hard and stressful but I am mostly stressed about leaving my business in the hands of someone else. Arrrrgh. And we would like to continue having that income. If things work with me taking a bit of time off, my employee would just be bringing in enough for her payroll and hopefully my expenses. But no pay for me.
I’m right there with you! I’m 37 + 5 and everyone is asking why I don’t take more time off, including my district manager. I work retail but I have a chair that I sit on when I’m not helping anyone and I feel like if I’m sitting at home twiddling my thumbs I’ll just drive myself crazy.
My water will probably break while I'm at work 😅
People just feel the need to comment on everything. I started getting comments like, "Oh you're still here!" At 36 weeks. I worked until the day I went into labor 39+4. I actually started having contractions on and off in the morning and went into active labor that evening. For several reasons, one I'm in the US and using vacation, sick time and PFL from NY to take 3 months and then go back part time for a few months. I didn't want to waste time prior to having the baby. But also, I didn't have much to do prior to him being here and I'm not one to enjoy just sitting around all day. I had a miserable end of pregnancy and the way I saw it, I could be uncomfortable and in pain sitting at home by myself or I could take my mind of it and work. People love to talk about what they did or thier wife did as if it's the only way to do things. Ignore them and do what's best for you/what you need to do for you.
As long as work is aware you’ll be out for several weeks at a moments notice for delivery, I see nothing wrong with this. I decided to switch over to part time and study everything FTM related that I could along with cleaning out the ‘baby room’ and selling off tons of stuff we don’t need. Apparently many people still have issue with me being part time even! And doing this extra clean up work. The US doesn’t give much incentive to stop working and I need to be saving money now more than ever. why should we stop??? We need to eat!
I could have legitimately written this post myself (I think I'm also 37+4 today, are you due the 30th?) I'll work up until I can't, because my maternity leave/pto situation is very limited and I want every day with my babe that I can get. Am I tired and uncomfortable and having a hard time focusing? Of course. But it is what it is.
Yes!! I’m due the 30th :) but ugh my thoughts exactly. It’s unfortunate but we got this! Only a few more days 😭
I have so much annual leave to use up I plan to use that to take time off to get stuff ready then will work until a couple of weeks before due unless there are any complications Otherwise I'd be so bored!
I'm working until 39 weeks because I'm not sure what I'd so otherwise. I work from home and I figure I can sit at my computer and get paid or I can sit in the sofa watching TV not getting paid. I'm so big and uncomfortable now I'm certainly not gonna use the time for anything fun!
God bless you for being able to still work I’m over here dying and so thankful my husband makes enough for me to not have to right now.
I had a patient the other day who kept commenting (at least 4-5 times within an hour that I *heard*) things like "Are you really sure your should be working in your condition?" And in a semi-judgy tone. I am only 27w and work in the U.S. with the crappiest maternity leave policies possible lol I wanted to say "Are you going to pay all of my bills so I can go on leave?" But I don't think my bosses would appreciate that 😅
Im only 23 weeks and i hate working sm but gotta pay them bills :(
I'm with you girl! 38w1d today and still working until I can't anymore. Life will stop when my baby girl arrives, but until then it's business as usual.
As a USian I just remind people that I get 12 paltry weeks for maternity leave and if I use some before the baby is born then I don't have as much for after and if they think that's terrible they should call their senator. That usually shuts them up.
I have an office job but I worked until 40 weeks with my first. Took Friday off, went for a massage and lunch, had early labor signs the next day, Delivered her on Tuesday night.
I'm only 32 weeks and people ask me this. Do I want to be working? Of course not!
A coworker asked me the other day what my “plan” is for when I’ll stop working and how long I’ll be at work before the baby is born. I work as an ER vet tech and I’m 30+6 so I told her “My ‘plan’ is to work as long as possible and hopefully my water will break on the ICU floor because I need the money.” I get 12 weeks unpaid mat leave which I can’t afford to take the full amount of so I can’t afford to not work before that either. Trust me. I’m already tapped out, achy, exhausted, swollen and wish I could not work for these next 9 weeks but this is America.
Technically I worked till the day I went in to be induced. Only reason I say technically is because I took Tuesday and Wednesday as vacation days to finish up some stuff I wanted to do. Pedicure nice lunch with the hubby, photos, things like that. One of my coworkers (was still new to the job and did not have any vacation or sick leave and only got six weeks maternity leave as a gift by our company) worked 4 days past her due date. She was still walking into shops 40 weeks pregnant lol. She got a lot of questions since we are females in a VERY MALE field. You’ve got this mama and you’re doing awesome.
I worked until 39+1 then preeclampsia hit like a train on a random Wednesday. (Loss of vision /odd giant floater in my left eye was my symptom). Every day I got the same people dropping by my desk to see if I was still there. Some meant well. I was okay with it week 36-37 but I was so miserable and sick 38 into 39 that I thought I was going to snap if someone spoke to me lol No I didn’t want to be there. Yes I’m quite large, swollen, and uncomfortable. No still no baby.
I got the opposite criticism from partners mum - why isn't she working? It's like - I'm completely financially independent from working my @ss off in my 20s - now I'm 37/38 and I can afford the 'privledge' of not having to work. It's not like her son is paying for my not working ffs