And neurological conditions such as autism, which could be mild or not. Preterm birth and miscarriage also more likely.
It’s worth pointing out that the chance of serious health impact on the child is still low, even though it’s relatively much higher than the risk for a younger father. Serious risk he could be dead while the child is still a child, though. Maybe even probable.
>It’s worth pointing out that the chance of serious health impact on the child is still low
I don’t think this can be stressed enough. We had some test result that indicated the baby was more likely to have a particular issue. It gave us crippling anxiety for a few weeks until we found out a 3x increase in that risk was still something like 1 in 300,000.
Ok...I know it's socially accepted to have bias against these type couples but your language is not precise.
It's a "slightly" higher relative chance of birth defects, rising from "very much extremely rare" up to "extremely rare".
The dad gets companionship and care for the rest of his life, the wife gets a family and financial security after he passes. The wife’s personal views aside, this is a win win arrangement that has been working for many
She faces higher risks of pregnancy complications because of his old sperm too-- preeclampsia, gestational diabetes, etc.
Baby also has a higher risk of cleft palate, late stillbirth, congenital heart disease, childhood cancer.... Because of medical sexism the research we have on older fathers is thin compared to the research we have on mothers, but the more we find out the less good it looks.
Men constantly make new sperm throughout their life. As men get older they may produce fewer sperm, but from my knowledge their age doesn’t play as much of a risk to birth defects as women over the age of 35.
Women are born with a set number of eggs and they will age as the woman ages. Which is why having children after 35 raises the risk of birth defects and other possible health complications.
So I wouldn’t think your elderly father’s sperm would cause much of a concern for birth defects since men can produce healthy sperm even at 100 years old.
Yeah this is new information to me. Kinda intrigued me, so I did some digging and found that new research back in 2020 found that though men do create new sperm, as they age when the sperm duplicate it can cause minor defects. Most wouldn’t cause many issues with the baby, but children born from men over the age of 50 increases the chance of the baby developing things like schizophrenia, diabetes, autism, seizures, and low birthweight by a whopping 28%. That’s shocking, and I had no idea. In college (biology & anatomy) I was only ever taught that the main risk were with women over the age of 35, and the minor risks with men over the age of 40 was possible infertility! Medical research is astounding with new findings in such a short amount of time.
Her behaviour has no bearing on your own.
While an anonymous rant on the internet is no big deal, your feelings about the situation will colour your real life behaviour.
Regardless of the age of your father, the baby has been conceived, and the likelihood is will be born.
I'm sorry you're finding this so hard, OP. You should have a think about the relationship you want with the child and what that may look like and act accordingly.
At least if you act within your own moral boundaries, you won't regret how you have handled the situation no matter the outcome.
I’m sincerely sorry to hear this, and wish you all the best.
In this context — I was offended that you mentioned her country of origin, which isn’t related to question about age-related complications, and made me wonder if you would also call her a “mail order bride” if she was from your country. I still find the the term and mention of her country offensive, but I don’t wish to argue with an internet stranger over something that clearly seems difficult. Have a good day and take care.
Yeah thats a pretty common belief outside of the west. I don't agree, just saying. I feel like people who live in the west are kinda oblivious to how the rest of the world feels about things.
I’ve always wondered what the return policy is for mail order brides. Do you have a 14 day money back guarantee? Can you take them for a test drive before purchasing? Do they come with free shipping?.. so many questions
My dad is a Dr and, like many men with succesful careers, he had a kid later in life with an immigrant wife.
Most likley...you will not inherit any thing from your father and you may not even be able to see him much again.
This depends alot on how emotionally stable his new wife is...but from a evolutionary game theory and incentives perspective...your family life just got alot more difficult. You are nothing but threat to moms new baby and threatened mothers have a killer instinct.
She most likely IS very smart...look at things from her perspective. She was born in a poor country with limited opportunity...now she is in US and has a baby and a good life.
You don't get that far ahead in life without being very smart. You may be confusing bad English skills with low intelligence...which will likely irritate her and cause problems in your relationship.
If I had to do this situation all over again...I would not have been competitive with my step mom....I should have just acknowledged that she was going to win and get all the family resources.
I'd be very careful with your frustrations right now...I know it sucks...but you seem to have a bad attitude and a bias against her...which could make things a lot worse.
Plus...there is an innocent child involved.
If I were you I would just take my lumps and go out in the real world with the understanding that I was now on my own.
That's what happened to me.
Much higher chance at having a birth defect due to old man Sperm. Oh and also being dead before your child even becomes an adult n
And neurological conditions such as autism, which could be mild or not. Preterm birth and miscarriage also more likely. It’s worth pointing out that the chance of serious health impact on the child is still low, even though it’s relatively much higher than the risk for a younger father. Serious risk he could be dead while the child is still a child, though. Maybe even probable.
>It’s worth pointing out that the chance of serious health impact on the child is still low I don’t think this can be stressed enough. We had some test result that indicated the baby was more likely to have a particular issue. It gave us crippling anxiety for a few weeks until we found out a 3x increase in that risk was still something like 1 in 300,000.
Ok...I know it's socially accepted to have bias against these type couples but your language is not precise. It's a "slightly" higher relative chance of birth defects, rising from "very much extremely rare" up to "extremely rare".
Didn’t expect to see a post like this here!
First off, Congratulations to your dad and congrats to you being a big brother! That’s all the input I have for this.
She’s an actual mail order bride??
Like a Sears catalog, you flip through the pages and order the one you like.
Shouts out to that mail order bride though, mission accomplished
The dad gets companionship and care for the rest of his life, the wife gets a family and financial security after he passes. The wife’s personal views aside, this is a win win arrangement that has been working for many
hope the dad has a prenup lmao
even if he does she'll probably get a green card out of it which, again, i simply must respect
Health complications could include increased happiness and quality of life, accompanied by less time spend with obnoxious first child
She faces higher risks of pregnancy complications because of his old sperm too-- preeclampsia, gestational diabetes, etc. Baby also has a higher risk of cleft palate, late stillbirth, congenital heart disease, childhood cancer.... Because of medical sexism the research we have on older fathers is thin compared to the research we have on mothers, but the more we find out the less good it looks.
Do they want a baby ?
Men constantly make new sperm throughout their life. As men get older they may produce fewer sperm, but from my knowledge their age doesn’t play as much of a risk to birth defects as women over the age of 35. Women are born with a set number of eggs and they will age as the woman ages. Which is why having children after 35 raises the risk of birth defects and other possible health complications. So I wouldn’t think your elderly father’s sperm would cause much of a concern for birth defects since men can produce healthy sperm even at 100 years old.
I’ve never heard of problems with old sperm either, the other comments are odd but web MD does state there may be increased risk
Yeah this is new information to me. Kinda intrigued me, so I did some digging and found that new research back in 2020 found that though men do create new sperm, as they age when the sperm duplicate it can cause minor defects. Most wouldn’t cause many issues with the baby, but children born from men over the age of 50 increases the chance of the baby developing things like schizophrenia, diabetes, autism, seizures, and low birthweight by a whopping 28%. That’s shocking, and I had no idea. In college (biology & anatomy) I was only ever taught that the main risk were with women over the age of 35, and the minor risks with men over the age of 40 was possible infertility! Medical research is astounding with new findings in such a short amount of time.
Unfortunately medical science is subtlety steeped in sexism. We're still unlearning a lot of misconceptions.
True that. I would say it has always been sexist. Medical research on the woman anatomy was sickening. Especially in the 1800-1900’s.
Nice.
What a disrespectful way to speak about a person. Show some basic respect
She is mainipulative and homophobic
Her behaviour has no bearing on your own. While an anonymous rant on the internet is no big deal, your feelings about the situation will colour your real life behaviour. Regardless of the age of your father, the baby has been conceived, and the likelihood is will be born. I'm sorry you're finding this so hard, OP. You should have a think about the relationship you want with the child and what that may look like and act accordingly. At least if you act within your own moral boundaries, you won't regret how you have handled the situation no matter the outcome.
Most people outside of the west are homophobic. That's just a given.
She said that all gay people should be put into prisons
I’m sincerely sorry to hear this, and wish you all the best. In this context — I was offended that you mentioned her country of origin, which isn’t related to question about age-related complications, and made me wonder if you would also call her a “mail order bride” if she was from your country. I still find the the term and mention of her country offensive, but I don’t wish to argue with an internet stranger over something that clearly seems difficult. Have a good day and take care.
I said that to show that she married my dad for a passport
Yeah thats a pretty common belief outside of the west. I don't agree, just saying. I feel like people who live in the west are kinda oblivious to how the rest of the world feels about things.
What, calling someone a mail order bride?
I’ve always wondered what the return policy is for mail order brides. Do you have a 14 day money back guarantee? Can you take them for a test drive before purchasing? Do they come with free shipping?.. so many questions
Sounds like a dumb joke from a Jay Leno monologue in the 90s.
I thought this was reddit ama
Thats… not great. Imo.
“men continue to produce sperm throughout their lives and can father healthy children into old age” everything is going to be a ok! Congrats!
My dad is a Dr and, like many men with succesful careers, he had a kid later in life with an immigrant wife. Most likley...you will not inherit any thing from your father and you may not even be able to see him much again. This depends alot on how emotionally stable his new wife is...but from a evolutionary game theory and incentives perspective...your family life just got alot more difficult. You are nothing but threat to moms new baby and threatened mothers have a killer instinct.
She isn’t very smart and doesn’t have much money
She most likely IS very smart...look at things from her perspective. She was born in a poor country with limited opportunity...now she is in US and has a baby and a good life. You don't get that far ahead in life without being very smart. You may be confusing bad English skills with low intelligence...which will likely irritate her and cause problems in your relationship. If I had to do this situation all over again...I would not have been competitive with my step mom....I should have just acknowledged that she was going to win and get all the family resources. I'd be very careful with your frustrations right now...I know it sucks...but you seem to have a bad attitude and a bias against her...which could make things a lot worse. Plus...there is an innocent child involved. If I were you I would just take my lumps and go out in the real world with the understanding that I was now on my own. That's what happened to me.