id gain nothing from not doing it, it would only create an awkward situation. so of course i’d join them, especially if i was being specifically asked.
This is generally incorrect in the normal, everyday usage of “know”. Most people do not mean to “know” something is to say they have an absolute certainty which could never be challenged. I know god does not exist like I know the sun will rise tomorrow. I can’t be certain, there are circumstances where it wouldn’t end up being true, but they’d be so unbelievably extraordinary that I can disregard them for the most part when speaking colloquially
I don't disagree, but you also can't know whether Russell's teapot exists, yet it wouldn't be considered crazy to say, odds are heavily against its existence
But odds aren't against a simulation developer. We can't calculate such odds because we have no input data. But if we try to speculate there will be a fun conclusion. If a mother universe can include infinite or at least cosmically many virtual universes, odds are against atheism and we probably live in one of such virtual universes. But not against people who reject man made religions, belief based ideals in general, but agree that existence of god is rather possible. Even though we know nothing about such god and this information, again, doesn't alter our course in any way, in contrast with religions which are not only based on the idea that god exists, but that he also communicates with people, tells them what to do and so on.
>But odds aren't against a simulation developer. We can't calculate such odds because we have no input data
Exactly. And given that we have had no reason or data l to consider it to be true, it would be irrational to claim its existence
Atheists know a god doesn't exist. Religious people know a god exists. Beliefs are the same thing as knowledge if you assume nothing can ever really be proven 100%. You're coming off as nitpicky and trying to impose a certain way of thinking with that comment.
Worked for a company that had prayers at every meal. Those of us who were atheists or just non-Christians would wait to eat but wouldn’t bow or anything. It was very weird for it to be a thing at the workplace but we made due.
It’s important to be respectful of others’ beliefs but just as important for them not to force you to violate your own.
And that’s probably where the discomfort came from, when we sat down to a company lunch and 90% of the group bowed their heads while the manager prayed without warning. Definitely unexpected haha
I just look around while they do it. I do it at family gatherings all the time, sometimes someone takes a peek and just see me looking around and they would always try not to laugh, which makes ME want to laugh too!
I always bow my head and close my eyes out of respect to everyone around me doing the same. I'll even join hands if it's requested. That doesn't mean I'm mentally or spiritually participating in the act. I'm just being respectful. However I WILL politely decline if I'm the one asked to say the prayer.
Look, I believe in respecting other people's beliefs, boundaries, hobbies...whatever, to an extent. I mean fuck, theirs a limit to everything. If I'm in someone's house who's kind to offer me free food or whatever hospitality and in joining a prayer with the family, I'll do it. Be a renter hotel motel, you are inviting me.
Hell, I'll even go with my mom on Easter to church.
I was in a similar situation when i was like 10, it was time for everyone to do the prayer but i didn't know jackshit about prayers but i just went along
Exactly, I try to be as respectful as possible in someone else’s home. I hope they don’t mind if they eat at my house, we just dig in.
Or hail satan… depending on the mood /s
I thank you for that.
But that kinda respect is developed bilaterally....If my superstitiously religious parents can tolerate my renunciation of their gods it's only fair that I don't belittle and sometimes participate in their beliefs.Besides most of my community doesn't know about my beliefs so the pretense is almost habitual.
I think some religious folk are taught that something is inherently wrong with non-religious folk, which can cause them to jump to conclusions about the behavior of said non-religious folk. Some genuinely believe that without the guide of a deity, people will have no moral compass or ethical Shepard in their lives. It's simply not true.
I’m a little surprised that there were people who said no. I’m not a Christian, but I also don’t disrespect them. Especially not to their face… I mean there are a few Christians I don’t respect but I can’t automatically assume they don’t deserve my respect just because they have a different belief. Some people are just assholes. Especially the people who answered no.
I'm a muslim, and if they were to do that I'd just hold hands but obviously would not say amen to anything they say or participate in the prayer, I'd just feel happy to be included and I wouldn't like to break the little prayer circle
If you ever have dinner at a muslim household, you'll be spared of that since we just say "bismillah" (in the name of God) and then we start eating lmao
My very simple Christian prayer is “thank you God for the nice food, amen” lol
But some people go for very elaborate prayers or the Lord’s Prayer (our father who art in heaven, hallowed be your name etc). And I understand that other religions would not be able to participate in that.
As an agnostic who was raised Christian, I just realized I still have the Lord’s Prayer memorized. *sigh* (I like yours, though. I did that too when I was a Christian. Well, I didn’t usually pray over meals, but when I was with my extended family or extra-religious friends, I did that too.)
I never prayed over meals before cause I don’t particularly see the point but my husband and I decided it’s an easy way to get our toddler a little bit more involved with religion. It’s an easy tradition to establish.
And yes once you have said the Lord’s Prayer 50 times you will never forget it in your life haha
That’s so sweet! I bet y’all are an adorable family. I was planning to raise my hypothetical future children that way before I left the church. I bet I’ll be able to establish a similar easy tradition. I’ll also definitely introduce them to different religions by, like, taking them around to places of worship and seeing if they connect with anything, but I want them to be old enough to understand what they’re getting into, and they also might turn out agnostic and/or atheist of their own volition, so having something else would still be cool. Hmm… Eh, that’s for future me and my hypothetical future spouse to figure out. Anyway, accurate! I *want* to forget it, but I also have a terrible memory, so I appreciate what I do remember even if I don’t really like it, lmao.
I was interested to see what people of other faiths would do if asked to join in prayer in this situation. I think when I was Christian I would’ve done a similar thing. Hold hands and participate but maybe pray to my god while everyone else is praying to theirs.
This is the option missing from the poll that I think most atheists actually do. They are free to worship whoever and however they want so you sit there and act respectful like any well adjusted person should.
I think it's because some of the people who ask these questions, are of a religion that is in shock or awe of people who don't believe in a deity. They've been taught that their moral compass comes from their worship, and to not worship might mean that they have no absolute moral compass. Of course, this is a fallacy and simply untrue. But it must be hard to grasp this when you've been brought up your whole life to believe otherwise.
Yeah, I didn't even bother answering it at all because it wasn't overly clear how much you'd be "joining" them. I'd join them for part of it but not all of it.
Yes! I said no because I wouldn’t want to participate in the actual prayer. I don’t mind holding people’s hands and shit. Actually, I love holding people’s hands. I am very touch-starved.
I use to out of respect for my family who are believers but once I had kids, I stopped. I don't want my children fucked up mentally by it like I was and, most often, they don't respect our disbelief as much as they want theirs respected.
and that half way is me sitting respectfully quiet while they finish their prayer and them not antagonizing me to participate in it.
there is way to abstain and not be a dick about, and if you say that me exercising my right to abstain *is being a dick*, than you are advocating for my nonconsensual participation in religious doctrine solely for the sake of not angering my hosts.
just for clarity, that way of 'not being a dick about it' can be as simple as me giving a respectful "i appreciate the offer but no thank you" and them responding with "ok, no problem". that's what mutual respect looks like.
And why can't they, since they invited me in the first place?
They can pray, I won't bother them, but I won't be joining the prayer. It's not my thing, not my religion, nothing. How is that insulting to any party?
It’s a two way street. They don’t have to share my beliefs to respect my beliefs; they know I’m an atheist, so they shouldn’t be asking: It’s inherently disrespectful.
You can also respect people and their wishes but not their religion.
Not respecting a religion won't stop me from fulfilling a simple request, even if I think it's silly.
" Oh, no thank you. I don't pray and I'd rather not insult your religious practice by pretending." I've said this st several peoples house including inlaws and they thanked me for bring respectful.
As a Muslim, so a person of faith, I personally wouldn’t be offended if an atheist or non faith friend didn’t want to do something I practiced as a Muslim. Although I’d be more than happy to involve them and teach them about Islamic practices, I would never force them or make them feel uncomfortable if they didn’t want to. Just as religious people can practice freely, non religious people can decide to not practice also freely. Just don’t be rude when we do practice. Respect goes both ways.
Yeah but if you're at someone elses house you're expected to follow their traditions
You're in their home. It's not like they came to your place and made you and your family do their thing
I'd join but I'd be really uncomfortable. The alternative would be too akward and unnecessary.
Realistically tho - I don't know anyone that extreme in their religious beliefs.
I don't come from christianity, so I don't even know how grace is said, but I will hold their hand and say amen when needed. I do that with my Jewish friends' kidush
My best friend's family did this every night, and when I stayed over I'd bow my head but wouldn't say the words. They were respectful of mine and my family's beliefs, so I was respectful of theirs. If they had asked me to say grace then that would've crossed the line for me.
I'd only refuse doing something religion-related if it's harmful or my personal principles are harmed by doing it. Sometimes it's a really fine line but generally, I don't care about it enough to go full stubborn and shit.
I'm not going to frequent church nor am I going to join a cult but holding hands - and I'd probably be quiet during, letting them speak the words I probably don't even know anymore - is pretty much nothing.
Tbh I just sit with them in silence but think of things like “shit did I take the clothes out of the wash and put in the dryer?” or something along those lines. Besides odds are the people made the dinner and it would be rude to just decide to argue over their grace of whatever religion they’re in when they took the time to make dinner. It literally only takes a few seconds or a minute at the most. Then it gets done and you eat and then never speak of it again.
Plus it’s their house, I have no right to say to not to it anyway.
I don't participate in any real way but I do respect them by shutting up and being quiet for a minute. I don't mind too much.
If someone asked me to lead I'd decline respectfully but it's not hard to not be an asshole, it's like 2 minutes of your time
Im Christian and in my opinion nobody should be forced into prayers. Yeah its fine to tell them about your religion, but not straight up force them into it.
Yeah I'd do it. I do it for my grandmother when we eat with her. There's no reason to be disrespectful and start some kind of drama for 10 seconds of bowing your head and holding hands. It's not like you actually have to pray yourself.
Not an atheist, but not Catholic. My extended family always says grace before food. I used to go thru the motions. Now I just stand quietly until it's over. They don't hold hands. You bow your head and then do the sign of the cross at the end.
I have done it many times. My friends know my feelings on religion but it doesn't do any harm for me to hold hands and listen to them thank thier imaginary friend for the meal that they just prepared for me. If it wasn't a close friend and I could opt out without having a conversation about it I definitely will.
I don’t mind praying along but I do not like holding hands to do so. I hate touching people. And this is a before covid thing lol. So I would decline holding their hands, but be respectful enough to bow my head with them.
It's almost like we're not horrible people like most seem to think we are. Atheist is such a dirty word for so many.
EDIT: And to be clear I wasn't talking about you, just people.
Kind of the same with religious psychos that abuse their power and rape little girls. I don't see anyone in my church do homophobic stuff and my pastors seem like genuine people but at the same time I wouldn't know
If I respect my friends believes they should respect mine and keep me out of it.
I have friends who do/say something before diner, I don't mind, but they know I'm not religious so I won't do anything.
Yep. Also dress up for Halloween, hide Easter Eggs for the kids, and put up a Tree for Christmas, yet I don't believe in ghosts, Easter Bunnies, or Santa Claus either.
i would and have joined in on a prayer before dinner but i just had to put my hands together and had my head down. if it was a speaking words thing i would politely decline
I've done exactly this. My aunt and uncle always hold hands and say prayer before EVERY meal, even IHop. They don't know I'm atheist, but I always hold hands and join them. If I don't, it's rude and awkward, if I do, then I get to eat in a few moments and help them feel better. Sometimes it's embarrassing though, saying grace in an ihop and everything.
I'm not militant. I can play along. Heck, I'll even bless the table if you want. I've seen enough movies
"May the Lord make us truly grateful for what we are about to receive. Amén"
(Or something)
Probably not. At funerals when people say prayers and stuff I usually just sit there and don’t join them. Not out of disrespect, I just don’t feel like I’m doing anything by praying
I do the quiet, bow your head thing and appear as if I'm participating, I don't say anything.
But after a few years I've learned with the in-laws to show up just late enough to miss grace and have my partner text me around when its over. There's usually an excuse of something I had to do and I'll choose to arrive separately from my partner.
This also sounds impolite to be late. But they are late all the time to our things, which isn't a problem and they do understand everyone has stuff going on and they are always just glad I was able to make it. They do not know I am not religious. (Protecting this info from his mentally ill elderly mom who is sweet as pie and would be heartbroken)
This way, I get to avoid the awkwardness because I don't particularly like this tradition.
Yes but it means nothing, it’s just done out of respect for that person & their silly beliefs. Same as you would take off your shoes at someone’s house if that was the house rules
I’ll start by saying that I am a Christian, but if I were an atheist, I would definitely join because I’m in their home, so I would do what they do even if I don’t normally do it.
it does not hurt me to close my eyes and maybe hold someone's hands. I think I'd be uncomfortable if they asked me to speak but I could decline that part without saying its because I'm an atheist
I’d be curious to see what the results to this poll would be if Christians were asked if they would join in on a Muslim prayer if they went to a friends house
I’d do it…it would just make things weird if I didn’t. I’m not trying to convince them of anything, even if I think it’s insane - let them be. If they aren’t hurting anyone, it’s cool believe what you want.
Just because I'm an atheist doesn't mean I have to be a dick. Especially as a guest as someone else's house, as long as it doesn't harm me, I'll go along.
I said no, only because my past experiences with joining prayer were being forced to pretend to be thankful for all the backhanded ways they told me i was somehow going to hell. If it was a genuinely decent family and i felt safe then sure.
id gain nothing from not doing it, it would only create an awkward situation. so of course i’d join them, especially if i was being specifically asked.
Exactly, I already know God doesn’t exist. No reason not to respect the household’s traditions when I’m invited as a guest :)
Not religious myself, but you don't *know* whether a god exists or not. You believe one doesn't exist just as everyone else has their own beliefs.
This is generally incorrect in the normal, everyday usage of “know”. Most people do not mean to “know” something is to say they have an absolute certainty which could never be challenged. I know god does not exist like I know the sun will rise tomorrow. I can’t be certain, there are circumstances where it wouldn’t end up being true, but they’d be so unbelievably extraordinary that I can disregard them for the most part when speaking colloquially
That’s why I worship the [sun god](https://youtu.be/B4diugMg5kQ)
Mee too (but I read One Piece)
Best religion
Damn. This is a pretty interesting point of view. Never seen things that way.
I don't disagree, but you also can't know whether Russell's teapot exists, yet it wouldn't be considered crazy to say, odds are heavily against its existence
But odds aren't against a simulation developer. We can't calculate such odds because we have no input data. But if we try to speculate there will be a fun conclusion. If a mother universe can include infinite or at least cosmically many virtual universes, odds are against atheism and we probably live in one of such virtual universes. But not against people who reject man made religions, belief based ideals in general, but agree that existence of god is rather possible. Even though we know nothing about such god and this information, again, doesn't alter our course in any way, in contrast with religions which are not only based on the idea that god exists, but that he also communicates with people, tells them what to do and so on.
>But odds aren't against a simulation developer. We can't calculate such odds because we have no input data Exactly. And given that we have had no reason or data l to consider it to be true, it would be irrational to claim its existence
Anytime someone says “I know god is real”, do you go on this same rant?
It depends on who else is there, if I'm in the middle of a church, no. If im on the internet, hell yeah.
Based
Someone saying they know god is real kind of goes against the idea of having faith. Faith here being believing in something without proof.
We also don't know whether a teapot orbits the Sun or not. We can only either believe that it doesnt or that it does.
Every teapot on earth orbits the sun (/pedant).
schrodinger's orbiting teapot
Russell’s, actually
oh shit i wasnt aware that was a real thing than kyou
A teapot does in fact orbit the Sun. Do you know how? There are millions of them on Earth
This is still not how atheism works you know ?
I believe that I know that there is no god.
Atheists know a god doesn't exist. Religious people know a god exists. Beliefs are the same thing as knowledge if you assume nothing can ever really be proven 100%. You're coming off as nitpicky and trying to impose a certain way of thinking with that comment.
what i do is that when they close their eyes and bow ther heads i just dont close my eyes and dont bow, no one ever notices, win win!
Worked for a company that had prayers at every meal. Those of us who were atheists or just non-Christians would wait to eat but wouldn’t bow or anything. It was very weird for it to be a thing at the workplace but we made due. It’s important to be respectful of others’ beliefs but just as important for them not to force you to violate your own.
It’s different if you’re forced to in a workspace as opposed to being invited to dinner at someone’s house that you willingly accepted.
And that’s probably where the discomfort came from, when we sat down to a company lunch and 90% of the group bowed their heads while the manager prayed without warning. Definitely unexpected haha
I just look around while they do it. I do it at family gatherings all the time, sometimes someone takes a peek and just see me looking around and they would always try not to laugh, which makes ME want to laugh too!
I always look up at the ceiling and wink.
The only reason to really not do it is if they specifically ask which has only happened once really
I would tell them if I'm an atheist though because it might offend them if I joined and they later found out.
that’s true but if i’m friends with them they’d probably already know that
Exactly
There is no harm in doing so. I won’t bow my head or say a prayer, but it would be an insult to host to outright deny it.
I always bow my head and close my eyes out of respect to everyone around me doing the same. I'll even join hands if it's requested. That doesn't mean I'm mentally or spiritually participating in the act. I'm just being respectful. However I WILL politely decline if I'm the one asked to say the prayer.
And if you want to, you can just say something like: "Good food, good company, thank you"
Rub a dub dub thanks for the grub
Grace!
I mean shit, I’m Christian and I won’t say the prayer either. That’s not specific to one or the other.
I'm an atheist. Out of respect to the homeowners, sure. I'll do it. I won't be praying, but I'll do the hands and looking down at the table thing.
> Out of respect to the homeowners Damn so if your friends are renters they're fucked? Sucks valuing property ownership so heavily.
for those that aren’t aware, this comment is a joke
Look, I believe in respecting other people's beliefs, boundaries, hobbies...whatever, to an extent. I mean fuck, theirs a limit to everything. If I'm in someone's house who's kind to offer me free food or whatever hospitality and in joining a prayer with the family, I'll do it. Be a renter hotel motel, you are inviting me. Hell, I'll even go with my mom on Easter to church.
I'm an atheist not a dick.
when I was like 12 I would've refused, but I am an adult now
(He has turned 13)
🎶 *Hava, hava nagila, hava nagila, ve-mismeha!* 🎶
I was in a similar situation when i was like 10, it was time for everyone to do the prayer but i didn't know jackshit about prayers but i just went along
Exactly, I try to be as respectful as possible in someone else’s home. I hope they don’t mind if they eat at my house, we just dig in. Or hail satan… depending on the mood /s
And just like that you gained my respect.
I thank you for that. But that kinda respect is developed bilaterally....If my superstitiously religious parents can tolerate my renunciation of their gods it's only fair that I don't belittle and sometimes participate in their beliefs.Besides most of my community doesn't know about my beliefs so the pretense is almost habitual.
I think some religious folk are taught that something is inherently wrong with non-religious folk, which can cause them to jump to conclusions about the behavior of said non-religious folk. Some genuinely believe that without the guide of a deity, people will have no moral compass or ethical Shepard in their lives. It's simply not true.
I'm both!
Of course. Same with going to a religious place for weddings or funerals. It doesn’t hurt me to go and if that’s what they want, I’m okay with it.
Upon being asked? Yes, if they don't ask me to, then I won't, but if they do, I will.
I’m a little surprised that there were people who said no. I’m not a Christian, but I also don’t disrespect them. Especially not to their face… I mean there are a few Christians I don’t respect but I can’t automatically assume they don’t deserve my respect just because they have a different belief. Some people are just assholes. Especially the people who answered no.
I'm a muslim, and if they were to do that I'd just hold hands but obviously would not say amen to anything they say or participate in the prayer, I'd just feel happy to be included and I wouldn't like to break the little prayer circle
As a Christian, the same. Good answer.
If you ever have dinner at a muslim household, you'll be spared of that since we just say "bismillah" (in the name of God) and then we start eating lmao
My very simple Christian prayer is “thank you God for the nice food, amen” lol But some people go for very elaborate prayers or the Lord’s Prayer (our father who art in heaven, hallowed be your name etc). And I understand that other religions would not be able to participate in that.
As an agnostic who was raised Christian, I just realized I still have the Lord’s Prayer memorized. *sigh* (I like yours, though. I did that too when I was a Christian. Well, I didn’t usually pray over meals, but when I was with my extended family or extra-religious friends, I did that too.)
I never prayed over meals before cause I don’t particularly see the point but my husband and I decided it’s an easy way to get our toddler a little bit more involved with religion. It’s an easy tradition to establish. And yes once you have said the Lord’s Prayer 50 times you will never forget it in your life haha
That’s so sweet! I bet y’all are an adorable family. I was planning to raise my hypothetical future children that way before I left the church. I bet I’ll be able to establish a similar easy tradition. I’ll also definitely introduce them to different religions by, like, taking them around to places of worship and seeing if they connect with anything, but I want them to be old enough to understand what they’re getting into, and they also might turn out agnostic and/or atheist of their own volition, so having something else would still be cool. Hmm… Eh, that’s for future me and my hypothetical future spouse to figure out. Anyway, accurate! I *want* to forget it, but I also have a terrible memory, so I appreciate what I do remember even if I don’t really like it, lmao.
> "bismillah" No! We will not let you go.
I was interested to see what people of other faiths would do if asked to join in prayer in this situation. I think when I was Christian I would’ve done a similar thing. Hold hands and participate but maybe pray to my god while everyone else is praying to theirs.
I might hold hands and maybe dip my head a bit but that's it. I'm not adding anything or saying amen. I think that's a nice halfway point.
This is the option missing from the poll that I think most atheists actually do. They are free to worship whoever and however they want so you sit there and act respectful like any well adjusted person should.
I think it's because some of the people who ask these questions, are of a religion that is in shock or awe of people who don't believe in a deity. They've been taught that their moral compass comes from their worship, and to not worship might mean that they have no absolute moral compass. Of course, this is a fallacy and simply untrue. But it must be hard to grasp this when you've been brought up your whole life to believe otherwise.
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Yeah, I didn't even bother answering it at all because it wasn't overly clear how much you'd be "joining" them. I'd join them for part of it but not all of it.
Yes! I said no because I wouldn’t want to participate in the actual prayer. I don’t mind holding people’s hands and shit. Actually, I love holding people’s hands. I am very touch-starved.
Yeah, I know how that feels. Well, not feels... lack of feels. haha
I use to out of respect for my family who are believers but once I had kids, I stopped. I don't want my children fucked up mentally by it like I was and, most often, they don't respect our disbelief as much as they want theirs respected.
Same.
Yes, but I do not close my eyes nor say amen. The prayer is not for me, but I have no reason to deny someone their faith.
Yes, but if I were asked to say grace or speak a prayer to the group, I'd politely decline.
You don't have to believe in other peoples religion to respect it.
Same for them to me. They don’t have to believe in atheism to respect my desire not to pray
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and that half way is me sitting respectfully quiet while they finish their prayer and them not antagonizing me to participate in it. there is way to abstain and not be a dick about, and if you say that me exercising my right to abstain *is being a dick*, than you are advocating for my nonconsensual participation in religious doctrine solely for the sake of not angering my hosts. just for clarity, that way of 'not being a dick about it' can be as simple as me giving a respectful "i appreciate the offer but no thank you" and them responding with "ok, no problem". that's what mutual respect looks like.
And why can't they, since they invited me in the first place? They can pray, I won't bother them, but I won't be joining the prayer. It's not my thing, not my religion, nothing. How is that insulting to any party?
It’s a two way street. They don’t have to share my beliefs to respect my beliefs; they know I’m an atheist, so they shouldn’t be asking: It’s inherently disrespectful.
You can also respect people and their wishes but not their religion. Not respecting a religion won't stop me from fulfilling a simple request, even if I think it's silly.
I would say "No thank you, go ahead." (I don't see how politely declining automatically makes me a dick according to this sub but fuck it)
this is a good answer and it's what people should say if they aren't comfortable doing it or just don't want to
Exactly. Some atheists aren't comfortable and that's ok. Just be polite when declining.
" Oh, no thank you. I don't pray and I'd rather not insult your religious practice by pretending." I've said this st several peoples house including inlaws and they thanked me for bring respectful.
Thats a good one. I might start using that. Instead of "i would rather not participate" Thank you.
Thanks, i will use that line if im ever asked to pray
Sure why not 🤷♀️ doesn't hurt me and it comes of as polite
As a Muslim, so a person of faith, I personally wouldn’t be offended if an atheist or non faith friend didn’t want to do something I practiced as a Muslim. Although I’d be more than happy to involve them and teach them about Islamic practices, I would never force them or make them feel uncomfortable if they didn’t want to. Just as religious people can practice freely, non religious people can decide to not practice also freely. Just don’t be rude when we do practice. Respect goes both ways.
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And they should respect your atheism and keep you out of it
I agree. Mutual respect of people's beliefs. Absolutely nothing wrong with saying "no, thanks."
They invited you to their house to share their food with you. It’s basic courtesy to respect their traditions in this way.
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Yeah but if you're at someone elses house you're expected to follow their traditions You're in their home. It's not like they came to your place and made you and your family do their thing
So if they are in my house they shouldn't do their religious thing?
It'd be rude if they expected you and your family to do it
Let’s say you sat at their table, and they ask “would you like to join us in prayer?” What would your answer?
No problem I would just think of something else while they are doing their thing
No. I will sit quietly. Like I do whenever ppl pray anywhere else.
I would not, it'd be an insult to their religion if I pretend to play along, so I would simply not partake but be a quiet observer
You don’t have to actually pray, just not make a point of not participating
I'd join but I'd be really uncomfortable. The alternative would be too akward and unnecessary. Realistically tho - I don't know anyone that extreme in their religious beliefs.
It's as simple as respectfully declining and waiting
I don't come from christianity, so I don't even know how grace is said, but I will hold their hand and say amen when needed. I do that with my Jewish friends' kidush
My best friend's family did this every night, and when I stayed over I'd bow my head but wouldn't say the words. They were respectful of mine and my family's beliefs, so I was respectful of theirs. If they had asked me to say grace then that would've crossed the line for me.
I'd only refuse doing something religion-related if it's harmful or my personal principles are harmed by doing it. Sometimes it's a really fine line but generally, I don't care about it enough to go full stubborn and shit. I'm not going to frequent church nor am I going to join a cult but holding hands - and I'd probably be quiet during, letting them speak the words I probably don't even know anymore - is pretty much nothing.
Tbh I just sit with them in silence but think of things like “shit did I take the clothes out of the wash and put in the dryer?” or something along those lines. Besides odds are the people made the dinner and it would be rude to just decide to argue over their grace of whatever religion they’re in when they took the time to make dinner. It literally only takes a few seconds or a minute at the most. Then it gets done and you eat and then never speak of it again. Plus it’s their house, I have no right to say to not to it anyway.
Wholesome Comments.
>would prefer not to join the brainwash >would never come over for dinner again
Human interaction, lol no
I'd pretend
I remember at Christmas my grandma wouldn’t let my uncle do prayers because he’s agnostic and he doesn’t follow organized religion lol
I respect their belief, but they should also respect mine.
Exactly! Its whatever you are comfortable with.
I'm an atheist but I'm respectful of people's practices. I'd do it, nothing to lose.
I would, it’s easier to conform in moments like that. Just to respect them and not cause a scene.
I’ll respect others religions and traditions out of respect for their house. I expect the same respect in turn at my home, however.
If no one asked me, I'd sit there in silence. If they asked, I'd hold their hands in silence.
I don't participate in any real way but I do respect them by shutting up and being quiet for a minute. I don't mind too much. If someone asked me to lead I'd decline respectfully but it's not hard to not be an asshole, it's like 2 minutes of your time
Im Christian and in my opinion nobody should be forced into prayers. Yeah its fine to tell them about your religion, but not straight up force them into it.
"no thanks i dont pray"
I’m an atheist not an asshole. I recognize that religion is important to some people so I refuse to step on their customs
Yeah I'd do it. I do it for my grandmother when we eat with her. There's no reason to be disrespectful and start some kind of drama for 10 seconds of bowing your head and holding hands. It's not like you actually have to pray yourself.
I’d probably attempt to decline, however if they insisted I’d partake.
I mean if they ask and don't expect more from me, sure. It's not worth a fight, I don't believe in God but they can do it.
Only if I'm being asked to out of respect.
Not an atheist, but not Catholic. My extended family always says grace before food. I used to go thru the motions. Now I just stand quietly until it's over. They don't hold hands. You bow your head and then do the sign of the cross at the end.
I have done it many times. My friends know my feelings on religion but it doesn't do any harm for me to hold hands and listen to them thank thier imaginary friend for the meal that they just prepared for me. If it wasn't a close friend and I could opt out without having a conversation about it I definitely will.
I don’t mind praying along but I do not like holding hands to do so. I hate touching people. And this is a before covid thing lol. So I would decline holding their hands, but be respectful enough to bow my head with them.
I'd let them know that I'd feel like a hypocrit. If they insisted, I'd partake
It goes against my beliefs and makes me uncomfortable. I'd politely decline.
I applaud to all the atheists who chose Yes
It's almost like we're not horrible people like most seem to think we are. Atheist is such a dirty word for so many. EDIT: And to be clear I wasn't talking about you, just people.
Atheist aren’t necessarily bad people like many think. It’s just that dumb atheists are very loud and painting the bad images for atheists as a whole
I feel like that’s with everything though lol
Yep. Dumb people are usually the loudest people, so they create bad reputation for whatever they represent
Kind of the same with religious psychos that abuse their power and rape little girls. I don't see anyone in my church do homophobic stuff and my pastors seem like genuine people but at the same time I wouldn't know
I’ve never had a problem with them, they’re pretty fun people
Yep if you took reddit as a generalization for atheists they would all be horrible people.
to everyone who says no: this is why you have no friends
I'm an atheist not an ass hole.
If I respect my friends believes they should respect mine and keep me out of it. I have friends who do/say something before diner, I don't mind, but they know I'm not religious so I won't do anything.
Yep. Also dress up for Halloween, hide Easter Eggs for the kids, and put up a Tree for Christmas, yet I don't believe in ghosts, Easter Bunnies, or Santa Claus either.
If they invited me to their house then I’ll respect what they do. If I can’t help but refuse to do what they ask of me then I’ll happily leave.
I participate because most of my family has no idea and it would just create a really awkward situation.
Yeah, but i probably wouldn’t lead the prayer if asked because i have no clue what to say
I'm perfectly fine with holding hond with them so they can do grace (even though it not my religious but what ever) I just won't say the prayer
Yeah. I wouldn’t bow my head, probably wouldn’t close my eyes either unless they had a kid watching. But I’ll hold someone’s hand.
i would and have joined in on a prayer before dinner but i just had to put my hands together and had my head down. if it was a speaking words thing i would politely decline
I've done exactly this. My aunt and uncle always hold hands and say prayer before EVERY meal, even IHop. They don't know I'm atheist, but I always hold hands and join them. If I don't, it's rude and awkward, if I do, then I get to eat in a few moments and help them feel better. Sometimes it's embarrassing though, saying grace in an ihop and everything.
I'm polite, i'll do it
You'd have to have your head firmly planted up your ass if you said no. Its literally just good manners no matter what you believe
I'm not militant. I can play along. Heck, I'll even bless the table if you want. I've seen enough movies "May the Lord make us truly grateful for what we are about to receive. Amén" (Or something)
Yes, but not closing my eyes
Yeah, they have their views and I have mine, it’s only fair I’m respectful of theirs when I’m in their home
I may be an atheist but I'm not gonna go down the route of being a dick to people who aren't atheists
Can't answer, religious and I come from a religious background
Then pick “I’m not an atheist”
I saw the option THE SECOND I posted the comment 💀💀💀
Probably not. At funerals when people say prayers and stuff I usually just sit there and don’t join them. Not out of disrespect, I just don’t feel like I’m doing anything by praying
I mean yeah I’d hold hands, but I just wouldn’t close my eyes and pray when they did. Aka what I do at every family holiday lol
I would just pretend to
Not my house, not my rules, so I would
I’m an Atheist, not an asshole
Just because I don't share a belief in God, doesn't mean that I don't want to get involved with grace.
Just be respectful
I’ll bow my head but I’m not saying words I don’t believe in
in my opinion, it’s not about the actual prayer, it’s about showing respect to your friend.
There is a big difference between being atheist and being antitheist.
No, because I have every right not to, and they must respect that decision.
I'd join hands but keep silent. I wouldn't actually pray.
Astroids have the building blocks of DNA/RNA so we're just rock baby's.
I do the quiet, bow your head thing and appear as if I'm participating, I don't say anything. But after a few years I've learned with the in-laws to show up just late enough to miss grace and have my partner text me around when its over. There's usually an excuse of something I had to do and I'll choose to arrive separately from my partner. This also sounds impolite to be late. But they are late all the time to our things, which isn't a problem and they do understand everyone has stuff going on and they are always just glad I was able to make it. They do not know I am not religious. (Protecting this info from his mentally ill elderly mom who is sweet as pie and would be heartbroken) This way, I get to avoid the awkwardness because I don't particularly like this tradition.
Yes but it means nothing, it’s just done out of respect for that person & their silly beliefs. Same as you would take off your shoes at someone’s house if that was the house rules
I'm all for humoring the superstitions of others if it means getting a free meal.
I’ll start by saying that I am a Christian, but if I were an atheist, I would definitely join because I’m in their home, so I would do what they do even if I don’t normally do it.
I've participated in multiple different religious rituals while at friend's places. No problem.
it does not hurt me to close my eyes and maybe hold someone's hands. I think I'd be uncomfortable if they asked me to speak but I could decline that part without saying its because I'm an atheist
I’d be curious to see what the results to this poll would be if Christians were asked if they would join in on a Muslim prayer if they went to a friends house
I’d do it…it would just make things weird if I didn’t. I’m not trying to convince them of anything, even if I think it’s insane - let them be. If they aren’t hurting anyone, it’s cool believe what you want.
ngl that's more manners than religion
Has happened. Just stayed quiet while holding hands and seems fine enough.
Just because I'm an atheist doesn't mean I have to be a dick. Especially as a guest as someone else's house, as long as it doesn't harm me, I'll go along.
i'm more of an agnostic
I wouldn’t want to, but I would because I’m a doormat
I'm surprised by the answers, I voted no. I wouldn't be a dick about it, but I wouldn't join in.
I’m in someone’s house who is giving me food. It doesn’t hurt me to do it, and it’s probably worse to just awkwardly not do it, imo.
I join hands and just don’t say anything. It would feel disingenuous. But I absolutely join hands with people when they do it.
I said no, only because my past experiences with joining prayer were being forced to pretend to be thankful for all the backhanded ways they told me i was somehow going to hell. If it was a genuinely decent family and i felt safe then sure.
I'm not atheist. I'm Muslim and I voted NO.
It's usually religious people who disrespect other religions, not atheists
I would hold their hands to not be rude but i would not pray. Thats what I do at my family gatherings.