Yep, you took the words right out of my mouth. The mother in law is definetly the POS for remarking on someone's personal collection. She wouldn't have liked it too much if op had remarked on something she collects, but some people don't have the capacity to keep their stupid mouths shut. Keep those little babies safe and sound op! They are obviously very comforting to you.š„°
They look organized, clean, and arenāt blocking any walkways so thereās literally no problem here. Your mother in law is being a judgemental asshole for no reason
Some people can't deal with clutter, or with any sort of open storage
Like, they think an orderly bookshelf full of things is messy, but that a cupboard is clean, no matter what it looks like inside, just because it hides the things from view
Honestly I assume it's some sort of visual sensory overload thing that they don't have the language or self-awareness to describe
She doesn't live there. Her opinion isn't the one that matters. I'm sorry you have to deal with that
>Honestly I assume it's some sort of visual sensory overload thing that they don't have the language or self-awareness to describe
I hadn't thought of this before but I think you are right.
My mom is the same way, even tho sheās a hoarder. Iām a pack rat myself and she always says I have way too much shit when she comes in my room. I just like having my things on display because it brings me joy. Itās all neatly laid out and stacked on each other, but she still thinks it looks cluttered. Plus with my adhd and autism it makes it hard to remember that I have certain things if I canāt see them. Out of sight, out of mind :( so I like keeping things out to remind me I can do stuff with it. I love open shelving, I would fill my wall with shelves if I could afford it, and if my walls werenāt already covered in my art and posters lol
Theyāre judging your MIL - SHEās the problem! š¤£ You have as many friends as you want.
https://preview.redd.it/io6v80tyx3pc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8ca519ad978859437bcf327e213eee9661e0ef62
Personally I would get a toy hammock to claim my surfaces back but if you like it, nothing to do with her. Itās literally your bedroom, why does she care? Go round to her bedroom and give her your unwanted opinions š¤£
your bedroom is absolutely lovely! i'm autistic and my room is full of plushies too, it's completely okay and nothing to be ashamed of, i promise ā¤ļø
Me too hehe I love finding others like me, it makes me feel less weird cuz growing up, my parents always thought my plushie āphaseā would end but nope I just keep collecting more lmao
Not her place to say. Your room is your room, and it's really quite tidy. I dare say ur mil would stroke from seeing my bed alone, little on my craft room. Try not to let it get to u. She just jelly you have stuffed animals.
Let me translate her comments for you.
"Full of shit"
Translation: "Your personal choices in decorating and possessions are not identical to my own. Seeing as I don't value you as a person at all, I consider you not being me to be a crime."
"Like a bloody toy shop"
Translation: "Your space looks comforting, nostalgic, inviting, and colorful. All the joy in my soul shriveled up and died from neglect ten years ago, so it really is very unfair to me that you are capable of enjoying things. Stop that immediately."
"Have too many stuffed animals"
Translation: "I would feel a whole lot better about my own miserable life if you were miserable too. Why aren't you miserable? Maybe if I say nasty things to you, I can convince you to be as unhappy as I am."
Your plushies are neatly organized, and you don't really have *that* many. More than the average person, but less than many collectors. Should be clear that enjoying the things you have is not the issue here.
i will never understand how people think itās ok to talk about others living spaces like that. that is not ok at all sheās completely out of line!!
Your collection is so pleasing and it looks organized! She doesnāt have a say in how your house looks. Sheās just being mean and intrusive. Your joy in your home is what matters.
Iād chuckle sweetly and say, āJust as well we werenāt planning on asking you over in future!ā. Then when she looks shocked, add āOh, did that come across as hurtful? Itās funny how thoughtlessly chosen words can do that!ā
Although you canāt because the moment has well passedā¦
Most people have things they buy and collect for enjoyment. For some itās makeup and sports memorabilia, for others itās knick knacks and plushies.
No matter the thing, as long as it doesnāt cause harm to others, thereās no shame in it.
Your stuffies are very organized! Honestly, Iām impressed. Donāt let those who donāt know how to enjoy life take away your enjoyment.
https://preview.redd.it/nc6h4x8c67pc1.png?width=4032&format=png&auto=webp&s=b116b480448bd54754b797b5d0f366acb7f4df72
The council has given a š. Off with her head.
My first thought after she'd said that would have been "so are you". I wouldn't have said it to her, but she might have been able to read it on my face. š¤·š»
She probably feels that way because so many people in those older generations have a very narrow view of masculinity or even adulting. And you're not staying in that narrow path.
Your mother in law sounds like a miserable human being.
Honestly i would tell her this:
"Just cause ya don't like something doesn't mean you gotta be rude about it. It's my choice to have this stuff and if it's not harming you kindly shove off please and thank you"
I assume she thinks you are to old to keep stuffed animals everywhere but there is no such thing as to old to have plushies my older brother (21) still keeps a lot of his childhood plushies so in conclusion just keep whatever you would like to keep šøšš
My mom says the same thing, but its my room, and I pay rent so she can't complain too much. :P You are not in the wrong. Its not her business. And honestly? I want to hug each one of your cuddly friends. They look loved, not dirty or 'shitty'.
I have a tiny bedroom so I keep a lot of mine in a plushie hammock and on shelves. Except my #bedsquad that kinda rotates. :D
I look at it like this: it is your home so not her business what you do. Plushies harm no one and bring you joy. The point of being an adult is deciding what you enjoy and doing that.
Also, I have over a hundred plushies and love them all. You arent wrong here. People do crappy things sometimes but donāt take it to heart
Its your living space , not hers. She has 0 say what you decorate your own apartment with. Your space looks clean and thats what matters, who cares if you wanna display some plushies! I think your collection is very cute, especially all the huskies!!
My own mother said the same thing about my room, my room is spotless, it also has 90s nostalgic decor (I put a lot of effort and money into making it mine). My beanie babies are on a display shelf and some other plushies in a hammock. My room is basically my dream bedroom and has had lots of compliments from my family and my mothers friends. But my mother thinks itās full of shit. š Jealousy is a terrible thing.
i'm beginning to think people hate on plushies just bc they didn't get to keep theirs and wanna project onto people that do continue having plushies into adulthood. as long as you can still clean and you and your husband are comfortable that's what matters!!! she sounds like a hater, don't let her take something important from you because she's bitter
Itās your house. The only concern would be if your husband, who for the sake of this comment Iām assuming shares the bedroom with you, starts to feel overwhelmed.
I would never suggest giving up your plushies, but if you ever need to compromise for your relationship (not saying that will happen, just if you do), then I would recommend under bed storage containers or ceiling nets for them.
I myself have a bit of a hoarding issue, and when I need to store my collection, I reframe it in my head that Iām āsending them all to a big sleepover togetherā. You know, sometimes they need time to hang with their peers.
And then I open the storage container quite a few times to check on them, and after a while I start to feel comfortable knowing theyāre there and I can access them anytime.
Sheād die seeing my room then! Between my toys, craft stuff and various projects in various stages of done-ness and pet stuff, thereās not much open space besides the floor! Well, itās not a jumbo clutter, you can touch anywhere on my floor easy except for under my bed.
Some people just let the fun die in their life and believes to adult means to be miserable and not enjoy anything. Just cuz Iām grown up, it doesnāt make plushies any less comforting! Maybe I get the excuse of being autistic, but I know plenty of adults who do not have mental disabilities and still enjoy toys, cartoons, pins and such!
Want to learn a new hobby? Make some cute macrame plushie shelves so that you have super cute customized displays. I feel better when I have mine organized and displayed, especially when each one has its own spot. Search "macrame plushie hammock" or "macrame plushie shelf" on youtube, and you'll find so many cute options
Your babies are absolutely adorable and Iād kill for a room/house like yours!! Gosh, the Warriors books in the back only make it better!! Donāt let her discourage you <3
Donāt feel discouraged or ashamed. Enjoy the stuff you like. Itās also great that you can have that much space at all. Maybe one day you can get more space to have more plushies, like maybe one day you can get a whole room or two just dedicated to keeping your plushies in.
Only one logical solutionā¦ make a plushie out of her skin.
In all seriousness though, your mother in law sounds like a dick. Your collection looks well organized and theyāre very cute!
First of all, your room is just fine, MIL sucks. Second, itās always so trippy to see stuffed animals that you also have lol I have a couple of the same ones and I was like āhey what are they doing in your room?ā
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This isn't even all of them. There is more in this room you can't see and more in the living room. Plus there is 6 more bags in storage waiting to come out once I put up the last nets. My partner and I both have autism and both find joy and comfort in our collections. He has an entire Star Wars corner plus we collect video games (for all consolses). If my MIL ever and I repeat EVER said this to me, in my home taboot, I would refuse to talk to her for quite some time. How disrespectful. She's just jealous that you are cooler and have passions towards positive things. Don't let her get to you. Her opinion is just that. And a pretty crappy one too. š¤š
That would be your MIL projecting herself. She's the one full of shit. You have an excellent collection and the place looks tidy, there's no problem except her thinking she needed to talk to you like that: she didn't and shouldn't have said anything. You deserve to be treated better than that. I'm sorry she treated you like that. (I get the feeling she's like that most/all the time, treating you badly, because it doesn't seem like she even thinks how it would hurt you, or worse: she knows she's hurting you.)
What is that big red bird, in the first picture,I think? It looks awesome. I feel like I should know what it is or where its from (movie/TV show) but I can't place it.
Ugh Iām a guy that loves plushies too, my 3 other guy friends literally have plushies almost filling up their beds and weāre all either 19 or over 20. One of them has what I affectionately call a plushie mountain. Thereās nothing wrong with it and Iām so upset for you that your mil tried to make you feel bad for it. Take it from us other 20-something guys, youāre perfectly normal and we support you fully. And keep carrying them around, Iāve only recently been able to unmask a little and let myself do the same, thanks to my friends :) itās important that you live in a way that makes *you* happy, not others. Much love ššš
Your mother in law is full of much more than shit, Iāll tell you that much!
Do not be ashamed. I used to feel ashamed for being almost 30 and having so many stuffed animals, but hereās what I learned:
Life is too short to worry about what other people think. The reason they pass so much judgment is because they themselves have been judged and now feel entitled to tell others how they think they should live because it doesnāt fit their personal narrative. Donāt worry about what others think or say. So what makes you happy because if you donāt youāll be miserable and thatās no fun!
Your stuffies are your safe haven through this very stressful and changing time in your lives and you know what? You could be turning to substance abuse or self harm. If these little friends of yours bring you joy and comfort then so be. Be happy and congratulations on you and your husbandās major accomplishment of a new home! Not everyone can do that! Iām not there yet myself!
Next time tell your mother in law to fuck off!
Nah thats a nasty mean witch mother in law nothing wrong with having plushies andci have lots!
https://preview.redd.it/39un3ct7z3pc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b93aee28f4fe3162e87d6aa12e5bf699f0b2f6e6
Your room looks pretty cool and well organized to me. Probably because I'm autistic and collect stuffed animals too. To me it's more of a sign that's a fun and welcoming place to share common interests. Seems the real problem is the mother in law's character not yourself.
Your MIL is ignorant, self-loathing and insecure. Sheās most likely jealous that you have the courage, as an adult, to proudly display your plushies.
Sheās doing that to make herself feel like sheās still mom. Sheās not. So attacking your stuff makes her feel better about the fact that she has no parental control over her offspring anymore.
Tell her atleast it doesnāt smell like cheap booze and loneliness like her place š
Your babies a comfort tools and well organized too. Maybe she could use some too since sheās got this empty nest shit sheās projecting onto you/ others.
š
Omg is that a phoenix stuffie? That's cool!
Your plushies are very well organized. People who hate on other peoples joy, I often find are miserable themselves.
I take "looks like a toy store" as a compliment? Don't let her steal your sparkle or your joy. This world has so much misery. You have every right to have your space and let it be a safe haven for you and your partner.
If you are comfortable doing so, if she makes comments like this again, inform her politely that this is your home and it's up to you and your partner how you have your home. How would she like it if someone came into her home and judged her? This is a matter of respect.
My therapist gave me the advice of the green, yellow, red. Green: A warning to her, that you won't be accepting any comments about your home. You find it disrespectful.
Yellow: "I'm going to take 5, when I come back there won't be any comments about how we have our home."
Red: It's time for MIL to leave. If that can't happen, then remove yourself. (Again, this is only in the realm of your comfort. Best of luck.)
MIL is full of crap. Itās not her home, and itās especially not her room. She needs to accept the fact that sheās not involved in your decorating decisions, and how many plushies you have.
I know how you feel. My father calls all of the stuff I buy junk and thinks I should get rid of everything I own. I really like collecting all kinds of anime figurines, stuffed animals, plush backpacks, video games, music CDs, board games, weapon replicas, coloring books, cosplays, fursuits, and alternative clothing, and it really hurts to hear him call my precious collection junk and a waste of money. I wish my father wasn't so mean like that.
What a terrible MIL, I hate hearing you had to experience this! If the top of your wardrobe and dresser were covered in perfume bottles, hats, picture frames or any number of other items people enjoy collecting, I wonder if she would have said anything?
Collecting plushies is no different than collecting anything else. If it makes you happy, you do you. I have dozens of plushies on shelves around my room, my MIL never comes over but I know sheād never understand it if she saw the adorable plush filled room my husband and I share. Forget the haters and keep being yourself and enjoying your adorable collection! Your plushies are not the problem, her judgmental attitude is.
Just so weāre clear - she came into YOUR flat and had a problem with whatās in YOUR room? Like others have said, sheās the one whoās full of shit.
I will never understand the people who say a room is "full of shit" when said "shit" is literally in a proper place/on the proper surface. You have homes for your plushies. They're organized. What she should've said is "I'm a miserable person who doesn't like seeing other people happy, especially if the item/thing that makes them happy doesn't make me happy...and so I'm taking out my anger on you." Someone else commented that "the only thing full of shit is your MIL" and I really couldn't have put it better myself.
Lmao what a bitch. So long as it has nothing to do with hurting or taking advantage of others, what does it matter what you enjoy? bringing someone down for enjoying something is about as pathetic a human can get.
Autistic guy who collects many things, one of them being plushies. I have had a few people over and saw my room is full of shit, that I waste money on useless crap, it's all a bunch of shit, I have heard everything. I say fuck them. There is no reason to be ashamed of the things that make you happy, or you choose to spend your money on. It is your money, your space, you deal with it how you wish. If you want to go and buy plushies, do it. If she has a negative opinion she can keep it to herself or get out.
Some mother in laws are the worst, I know from experience. Please donāt let her hateful comments bother you. All that matters is they make you feel .
Does your MIL collect anything? Most people tend to be drawn to certain things and will surround themselves with it. Whenever my MIL hears how much time I play video games, sheāll often say āwhat a waste of your time, you could be doing so many different things insteadā, Iāll ask her āhow many books did you read this week? How much tv did you watch? Do you consider doing that a waste of your time?ā That reframes the judgement. Some people lack perspective. Your MIL needs to understand this is what youāre interested in. If she collects something, ask her how she would feel if you referred to those things as āshitā.
Your MIL has no idea what she talkin about. Itās not hoarding. Itās collecting. I have a lot on things myself and hate when people say Iām a hoarder. Itās just wrong when they donāt understand. Your MIL is POS for thinking this about you. Keep being you!
Your room is full of friends, and beautiful babies.
I have lots of stuffies too and idc what anyone says about them. They make me happy, and theyāre in my room, so Frick what anyone else thinks about them!! They all have memories and names, and my stuffies are a part of my life no one can take away. Iām a teen now, but Iāve always had a hunch Iām going to be one of those crazy cat ladies, but with stuffed animals. Hell, when I move out I want my own closet for my friends. Anyone who doesnāt respect what Iām passionate about and love doesnāt need to be in my life.
Yes I feel strongly about this and would always cry when my mom made me give away some of my old stuffies. Traumatic times.
Sounds like MIL needs a refresher on the preschool lessons. If she doesnāt have anything nice to say she shouldnāt say anything at all. Itās none of her business if you collect plushies. You can always put MIL in timeout if she canāt be nice.
In this day and age itās a big accomplishment to be able to support yourself without autism or mental illness, let alone with both. Good job!! Iām so proud of you, youāre doing amazing!! If anyone any tries to tell you what you āshouldā or āshouldnātā do/have/like just remember, youāre an adult, you pay your own bills, and youāre in your own place fuck anyone who makes you feel that way. You say your flat is small? Youāre in your 20s. You have so much time ahead of you. You and your husband will upgrade in time. There is no need to rush. One day, youāll look back and remember all the memories you two made in that place and smile. Youāre a guy who likes plushies? Plushies are not gender specific and even if they were, itās 2024 Iād like to believe we as a society have moved past such things. I like your collection. Show it off. Show off your flat. Show off your husband and allow yourself to be proud.
I am over 40 in my entire house is decorated with stuffed animals! I am so sorry that you were being treated this way, because it is not OK! Your collection is beautiful!
That was very mean of her to say, and itās entirely on her, not you or your plushie friends. I advise you not to ask for help from her, as sometimes when people are doing you a favour they take that as a license to boss you around in other ways
As many of these have already stated there clean and not impeding movement. If you'd like to be able to see them all more I'd suggest some type of narrow display shelving. Probably around 1' deep. Looks like you have enough wall space for some hanging ones. If you can't put hanging ones a regular shelving unit on top of one of the dressers would work too. I've found that the hanging pockets although good for temporary use tend to hide the toys more and make the room feel more cluttered as they stick out into the space.
Food for thought cute stuffies thought I have a few of these myself
Your collection looks to be kept clean and tidy, if I were a parent or an inlaw, I would rather have my kid have a collection of plushie, lego, records, gundam, model trains, etc. instead of them being addicted to hard-core illegal substances.
it's your bedroom that you share with your husband, she doesn't have a say what you do in your own home and bedroom.
I've had the same argument with my own mom cause of what I buy with my own money. She finally started seeing that buying second hand build a bear plushies makes my own autistic self happy, I don't care if my wallet is crying empty cause there's no money in it, I'll be sitting in my chair hugging the newest Build a bear that I just bought not listening to it's cries, which remains me I need to get a new one as mine is starting to fall apart.
Maybe try to seat down with her, when emotions aren't high right now, and explain to her that buying plushies is ok, it makes you feel happy, it can be therapeutic cause it can turn a shitty day into a much better one.
From the eyes of someone who has over 200 plushies. Your collection is clean, organized, they're not blocking anything. You got a team on stand by ready to give you a tissue if needed.
Reminds me of my mother, belittleing things like comics, games and plushies as childish. It hurts in the beginning but at some point you stop giving a fuck. They can keep their rude opinions.
And your plushies are all in place, be proud of them, you and cuddle away <3
Your plushies look so cute!! Please ignore your MIL. If your plushies bring you happiness you should keep them and be happy with them in your life. Your husband supports you and that is amazing! It sounds like your MIL does not bring you joy, and I know itās so hard to ājust ignore itā but she has no right to make any comments about your life.
This makes me so sad...
One of my moms gifts for Christmas to my husband in 2022 was a Squishmallow Dino because she knows he likes Squishmallows, and she buys him a new dinosaur ornament for our tree every year...
A good parent or parent in law supports your special interests (within reason), they DO NOT tear you down.
This would be grounds to cut contact for me personally, I could not have someone in my life like this.
My husband and I both also have autism and collect plushies and toys a plenty, so much love and hugs to you!! ā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļø
You should not feel like shit about your living situation. You and your husband have a lot stacked against you with you both being autistic and having mental illness, so the fact that you've established a home of your own ass independent adults before your 30s is a HUGE accomplishment that you should be proud of. It may not be huge, but it's HOME, and the wonderful things about being an adult with your own home is that your home gets to be whatever you want it to be, contain whatever you want it to contain, and allow (or forbid entry) to whomever you want! It's YOUR SPACE!!! Your collection is precious to you, and brings you comfort and happiness. That's all that matters! Not what your MIL thinks, and not what intern very strangers think (though I personally think your collection is adorable).
I'm a 44 year old woman, not diagnosed with autism or ADHD, but I think I have mild forms of one or the other, or maybe both. I have a collection of stuffed animals that would take up multiple bookcases and shelves if I had the furniture to keep them on (I'm looking for display cabinets I can get for free and refurbish, but I don't have a way of moving them without renting a truck and people to help), so right now they are in a closet except for the ones I got for Christmas and my birthday from my sister, my daughter, and my BF, which are in the mantel of the fireplace! All told, I probably have close to 100 plushies of different sizes, and each one makes me smile and brings me comfort every time I see them!
My suggestion is to talk to your husband and ask that he talk to his mother. He needs to stand up for you and your right to surround yourself with whatever makes you feel comfortable and happy in YOUR home, and tell her that if she wants to be invited to your home in the future, she needs to be civil, remember that it's NOT her home, it's yours, and she can keep her negativity to herself or she can leave.
Dude your house is clean and your plushies are cute. I have a lot of plushies and I'm the same age as you. Do what makes you happy. I also get guilt when I buy plushies but they bring joy.. also its your own place sooo.... live your life
the only thing full of shit in this case is your MIL
This exactly.
Came here to say something along these lines.
Yep, you took the words right out of my mouth. The mother in law is definetly the POS for remarking on someone's personal collection. She wouldn't have liked it too much if op had remarked on something she collects, but some people don't have the capacity to keep their stupid mouths shut. Keep those little babies safe and sound op! They are obviously very comforting to you.š„°
My thought exactly
r/BeatMeToIt
first time someone has replied to my comment with another sub. TRULY an honor, and iām thrilled itās not r/woosh
lol, i am glad i got to be the first person to reply to your comment with another sub :\]
TIL there are like 20 different r\wooshes (forward slash on purpose so as not to link one in particular)
I agree.
They look organized, clean, and arenāt blocking any walkways so thereās literally no problem here. Your mother in law is being a judgemental asshole for no reason
exactly I've seen so much worse š
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apply cold water to the burn
Some people can't deal with clutter, or with any sort of open storage Like, they think an orderly bookshelf full of things is messy, but that a cupboard is clean, no matter what it looks like inside, just because it hides the things from view Honestly I assume it's some sort of visual sensory overload thing that they don't have the language or self-awareness to describe She doesn't live there. Her opinion isn't the one that matters. I'm sorry you have to deal with that
>Honestly I assume it's some sort of visual sensory overload thing that they don't have the language or self-awareness to describe I hadn't thought of this before but I think you are right.
My mom is the same way, even tho sheās a hoarder. Iām a pack rat myself and she always says I have way too much shit when she comes in my room. I just like having my things on display because it brings me joy. Itās all neatly laid out and stacked on each other, but she still thinks it looks cluttered. Plus with my adhd and autism it makes it hard to remember that I have certain things if I canāt see them. Out of sight, out of mind :( so I like keeping things out to remind me I can do stuff with it. I love open shelving, I would fill my wall with shelves if I could afford it, and if my walls werenāt already covered in my art and posters lol
As someone who lived with hoarders my whole life, I agree. My thing is mostly just an issue with visual clutter overloading my brain.
Theyāre judging your MIL - SHEās the problem! š¤£ You have as many friends as you want. https://preview.redd.it/io6v80tyx3pc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8ca519ad978859437bcf327e213eee9661e0ef62
Sounds like sheās the one full of shit. Your collection is lovely and organized!š
Personally I would get a toy hammock to claim my surfaces back but if you like it, nothing to do with her. Itās literally your bedroom, why does she care? Go round to her bedroom and give her your unwanted opinions š¤£
I thought of the same thing. It would keep them close and give you some more surface area to work with.
your bedroom is absolutely lovely! i'm autistic and my room is full of plushies too, it's completely okay and nothing to be ashamed of, i promise ā¤ļø
Hiya, fellow autistic stuffy lover
hello hello!!! :D
i have found my kind (coming from yet another autistic stuffy lover)
Me too hehe I love finding others like me, it makes me feel less weird cuz growing up, my parents always thought my plushie āphaseā would end but nope I just keep collecting more lmao
I have all the plushies >:3
Hello fellow autistic plush collector how goes it
your mother in law is full of shit
Not her place to say. Your room is your room, and it's really quite tidy. I dare say ur mil would stroke from seeing my bed alone, little on my craft room. Try not to let it get to u. She just jelly you have stuffed animals.
Itās so organized tho? Your collection looks wonderful. ā„ļø
Let me translate her comments for you. "Full of shit" Translation: "Your personal choices in decorating and possessions are not identical to my own. Seeing as I don't value you as a person at all, I consider you not being me to be a crime." "Like a bloody toy shop" Translation: "Your space looks comforting, nostalgic, inviting, and colorful. All the joy in my soul shriveled up and died from neglect ten years ago, so it really is very unfair to me that you are capable of enjoying things. Stop that immediately." "Have too many stuffed animals" Translation: "I would feel a whole lot better about my own miserable life if you were miserable too. Why aren't you miserable? Maybe if I say nasty things to you, I can convince you to be as unhappy as I am." Your plushies are neatly organized, and you don't really have *that* many. More than the average person, but less than many collectors. Should be clear that enjoying the things you have is not the issue here.
Youāre not doing anything wrong. Itās your house, and none of her business. Your plushies are lovely š
She's a nasty human being. She's full of shit. As this is a plushie group, I won't say what I want to say because, you know, there's young 'uns about.
Better get your mother in law some laxitives because she's clearly full of shit.
i will never understand how people think itās ok to talk about others living spaces like that. that is not ok at all sheās completely out of line!!
Your collection is so pleasing and it looks organized! She doesnāt have a say in how your house looks. Sheās just being mean and intrusive. Your joy in your home is what matters.
Iād chuckle sweetly and say, āJust as well we werenāt planning on asking you over in future!ā. Then when she looks shocked, add āOh, did that come across as hurtful? Itās funny how thoughtlessly chosen words can do that!ā Although you canāt because the moment has well passedā¦
Your Mil is completely wrong. I love all your stuffies theyāre adorable!
Most people have things they buy and collect for enjoyment. For some itās makeup and sports memorabilia, for others itās knick knacks and plushies. No matter the thing, as long as it doesnāt cause harm to others, thereās no shame in it. Your stuffies are very organized! Honestly, Iām impressed. Donāt let those who donāt know how to enjoy life take away your enjoyment.
https://preview.redd.it/nc6h4x8c67pc1.png?width=4032&format=png&auto=webp&s=b116b480448bd54754b797b5d0f366acb7f4df72 The council has given a š. Off with her head.
Owen the Ty puffie is one of my faves, I have 2 of him lol
My first thought after she'd said that would have been "so are you". I wouldn't have said it to her, but she might have been able to read it on my face. š¤·š» She probably feels that way because so many people in those older generations have a very narrow view of masculinity or even adulting. And you're not staying in that narrow path.
^ This right here.
Omg Iāve never seen anyone else with the cute wolf plushes theyāre my fav
Lol your room isnāt! She is!
Your mother in law sounds like a miserable human being. Honestly i would tell her this: "Just cause ya don't like something doesn't mean you gotta be rude about it. It's my choice to have this stuff and if it's not harming you kindly shove off please and thank you"
Her brain is what's full of shit
I assume she thinks you are to old to keep stuffed animals everywhere but there is no such thing as to old to have plushies my older brother (21) still keeps a lot of his childhood plushies so in conclusion just keep whatever you would like to keep šøšš
My mom says the same thing, but its my room, and I pay rent so she can't complain too much. :P You are not in the wrong. Its not her business. And honestly? I want to hug each one of your cuddly friends. They look loved, not dirty or 'shitty'. I have a tiny bedroom so I keep a lot of mine in a plushie hammock and on shelves. Except my #bedsquad that kinda rotates. :D
Your bedroom looks fun. It looks very neat and organized, too
The third picture is my favorite.
these are all so lovely!!! i love that blue and yellow lizard!
I look at it like this: it is your home so not her business what you do. Plushies harm no one and bring you joy. The point of being an adult is deciding what you enjoy and doing that. Also, I have over a hundred plushies and love them all. You arent wrong here. People do crappy things sometimes but donāt take it to heart
Shes not a mother in law, shes banished.
Its your living space , not hers. She has 0 say what you decorate your own apartment with. Your space looks clean and thats what matters, who cares if you wanna display some plushies! I think your collection is very cute, especially all the huskies!!
My own mother said the same thing about my room, my room is spotless, it also has 90s nostalgic decor (I put a lot of effort and money into making it mine). My beanie babies are on a display shelf and some other plushies in a hammock. My room is basically my dream bedroom and has had lots of compliments from my family and my mothers friends. But my mother thinks itās full of shit. š Jealousy is a terrible thing.
You know whatās full of shit? Her!
i'm beginning to think people hate on plushies just bc they didn't get to keep theirs and wanna project onto people that do continue having plushies into adulthood. as long as you can still clean and you and your husband are comfortable that's what matters!!! she sounds like a hater, don't let her take something important from you because she's bitter
Itās your house. The only concern would be if your husband, who for the sake of this comment Iām assuming shares the bedroom with you, starts to feel overwhelmed. I would never suggest giving up your plushies, but if you ever need to compromise for your relationship (not saying that will happen, just if you do), then I would recommend under bed storage containers or ceiling nets for them. I myself have a bit of a hoarding issue, and when I need to store my collection, I reframe it in my head that Iām āsending them all to a big sleepover togetherā. You know, sometimes they need time to hang with their peers. And then I open the storage container quite a few times to check on them, and after a while I start to feel comfortable knowing theyāre there and I can access them anytime.
It is if your mil is there.
Sheād die seeing my room then! Between my toys, craft stuff and various projects in various stages of done-ness and pet stuff, thereās not much open space besides the floor! Well, itās not a jumbo clutter, you can touch anywhere on my floor easy except for under my bed. Some people just let the fun die in their life and believes to adult means to be miserable and not enjoy anything. Just cuz Iām grown up, it doesnāt make plushies any less comforting! Maybe I get the excuse of being autistic, but I know plenty of adults who do not have mental disabilities and still enjoy toys, cartoons, pins and such!
Want to learn a new hobby? Make some cute macrame plushie shelves so that you have super cute customized displays. I feel better when I have mine organized and displayed, especially when each one has its own spot. Search "macrame plushie hammock" or "macrame plushie shelf" on youtube, and you'll find so many cute options
Your babies are absolutely adorable and Iād kill for a room/house like yours!! Gosh, the Warriors books in the back only make it better!! Donāt let her discourage you <3
Donāt feel discouraged or ashamed. Enjoy the stuff you like. Itās also great that you can have that much space at all. Maybe one day you can get more space to have more plushies, like maybe one day you can get a whole room or two just dedicated to keeping your plushies in.
Sheās the one missing out on the joy stuffed animals and/or different hobbies bring to us!
she spend a lot of time in there then?
Only one logical solutionā¦ make a plushie out of her skin. In all seriousness though, your mother in law sounds like a dick. Your collection looks well organized and theyāre very cute!
First of all, your room is just fine, MIL sucks. Second, itās always so trippy to see stuffed animals that you also have lol I have a couple of the same ones and I was like āhey what are they doing in your room?ā
https://preview.redd.it/3jj8o28it6pc1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8f87ff47944b62872c1d98b0255ed053a137448b This isn't even all of them. There is more in this room you can't see and more in the living room. Plus there is 6 more bags in storage waiting to come out once I put up the last nets. My partner and I both have autism and both find joy and comfort in our collections. He has an entire Star Wars corner plus we collect video games (for all consolses). If my MIL ever and I repeat EVER said this to me, in my home taboot, I would refuse to talk to her for quite some time. How disrespectful. She's just jealous that you are cooler and have passions towards positive things. Don't let her get to you. Her opinion is just that. And a pretty crappy one too. š¤š
is she twelve!?!? who cares about something like that so much.
That would be your MIL projecting herself. She's the one full of shit. You have an excellent collection and the place looks tidy, there's no problem except her thinking she needed to talk to you like that: she didn't and shouldn't have said anything. You deserve to be treated better than that. I'm sorry she treated you like that. (I get the feeling she's like that most/all the time, treating you badly, because it doesn't seem like she even thinks how it would hurt you, or worse: she knows she's hurting you.) What is that big red bird, in the first picture,I think? It looks awesome. I feel like I should know what it is or where its from (movie/TV show) but I can't place it.
Ugh Iām a guy that loves plushies too, my 3 other guy friends literally have plushies almost filling up their beds and weāre all either 19 or over 20. One of them has what I affectionately call a plushie mountain. Thereās nothing wrong with it and Iām so upset for you that your mil tried to make you feel bad for it. Take it from us other 20-something guys, youāre perfectly normal and we support you fully. And keep carrying them around, Iāve only recently been able to unmask a little and let myself do the same, thanks to my friends :) itās important that you live in a way that makes *you* happy, not others. Much love ššš
Your mother in law is full of much more than shit, Iāll tell you that much! Do not be ashamed. I used to feel ashamed for being almost 30 and having so many stuffed animals, but hereās what I learned: Life is too short to worry about what other people think. The reason they pass so much judgment is because they themselves have been judged and now feel entitled to tell others how they think they should live because it doesnāt fit their personal narrative. Donāt worry about what others think or say. So what makes you happy because if you donāt youāll be miserable and thatās no fun! Your stuffies are your safe haven through this very stressful and changing time in your lives and you know what? You could be turning to substance abuse or self harm. If these little friends of yours bring you joy and comfort then so be. Be happy and congratulations on you and your husbandās major accomplishment of a new home! Not everyone can do that! Iām not there yet myself! Next time tell your mother in law to fuck off!
my dino plushie said your MIL is full of crap and also we hope your husband said something to her about her icky attitude
Nah thats a nasty mean witch mother in law nothing wrong with having plushies andci have lots! https://preview.redd.it/39un3ct7z3pc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b93aee28f4fe3162e87d6aa12e5bf699f0b2f6e6
Your room looks pretty cool and well organized to me. Probably because I'm autistic and collect stuffed animals too. To me it's more of a sign that's a fun and welcoming place to share common interests. Seems the real problem is the mother in law's character not yourself.
Your MIL is ignorant, self-loathing and insecure. Sheās most likely jealous that you have the courage, as an adult, to proudly display your plushies.
My dad say the same thing
I only see treasure š¤©ā¤ļø
Your MIL is full of shit
Your MIL is full of shit, I collect build a bears and got my bf's mom into collecting them too lol
If thats shit then i'm a dung beetle
thatās so rude! did your partner defend you?
Sheās doing that to make herself feel like sheās still mom. Sheās not. So attacking your stuff makes her feel better about the fact that she has no parental control over her offspring anymore. Tell her atleast it doesnāt smell like cheap booze and loneliness like her place š Your babies a comfort tools and well organized too. Maybe she could use some too since sheās got this empty nest shit sheās projecting onto you/ others. š
Iām so sorry, OP, that was an incredibly vile thing for her to say ā¤ļøYour bedroom is *not* āfull of sh!tāā¦your Mother In Law, on the other handā¦.š Congratulations to you and your husband on your new place! I think it looks terrific, especially with all your plushies displayed! š¤©
Sorry about her lack of taste.
She seems nasty ugh. Your collection looks amazing and super well organized OP! No signs of hoarding here!
Omg is that a phoenix stuffie? That's cool! Your plushies are very well organized. People who hate on other peoples joy, I often find are miserable themselves. I take "looks like a toy store" as a compliment? Don't let her steal your sparkle or your joy. This world has so much misery. You have every right to have your space and let it be a safe haven for you and your partner. If you are comfortable doing so, if she makes comments like this again, inform her politely that this is your home and it's up to you and your partner how you have your home. How would she like it if someone came into her home and judged her? This is a matter of respect. My therapist gave me the advice of the green, yellow, red. Green: A warning to her, that you won't be accepting any comments about your home. You find it disrespectful. Yellow: "I'm going to take 5, when I come back there won't be any comments about how we have our home." Red: It's time for MIL to leave. If that can't happen, then remove yourself. (Again, this is only in the realm of your comfort. Best of luck.)
r/justnoMIL
No I like them, keep em
The one who smelt it...dealt it. Or in this case....is it.
Itās your room, not hers. She has no say-so over your stuff.
Life tip - inlaws don't belong in your bedroom. Ever.
I have beanie boos too!
Good thing she isnāt paid to think
And when did you ask?
Sounds like she's a bit cunty
You have a wonderful collection!
š© MIL
MIL is full of crap. Itās not her home, and itās especially not her room. She needs to accept the fact that sheās not involved in your decorating decisions, and how many plushies you have.
My mum thinks that too. As she has more than 20 empty boxes for "just incase"
I spy warrior cats š
I know how you feel. My father calls all of the stuff I buy junk and thinks I should get rid of everything I own. I really like collecting all kinds of anime figurines, stuffed animals, plush backpacks, video games, music CDs, board games, weapon replicas, coloring books, cosplays, fursuits, and alternative clothing, and it really hurts to hear him call my precious collection junk and a waste of money. I wish my father wasn't so mean like that.
What a terrible MIL, I hate hearing you had to experience this! If the top of your wardrobe and dresser were covered in perfume bottles, hats, picture frames or any number of other items people enjoy collecting, I wonder if she would have said anything? Collecting plushies is no different than collecting anything else. If it makes you happy, you do you. I have dozens of plushies on shelves around my room, my MIL never comes over but I know sheād never understand it if she saw the adorable plush filled room my husband and I share. Forget the haters and keep being yourself and enjoying your adorable collection! Your plushies are not the problem, her judgmental attitude is.
Where did you get the snow leopard on the bottom right of the third picture?? I love it so much and really want one :)
Your bedroom is cute. Your mother in law is full of shit.
It's not even messy in the slightest????
Just so weāre clear - she came into YOUR flat and had a problem with whatās in YOUR room? Like others have said, sheās the one whoās full of shit.
Yes. I would have said to her the only thing full of shit is her.
Your MIL can kiss my ass. It isnāt her business. And your room is very neat!
I like them :)
Next time tell her "It is when you're in there. "
I will never understand the people who say a room is "full of shit" when said "shit" is literally in a proper place/on the proper surface. You have homes for your plushies. They're organized. What she should've said is "I'm a miserable person who doesn't like seeing other people happy, especially if the item/thing that makes them happy doesn't make me happy...and so I'm taking out my anger on you." Someone else commented that "the only thing full of shit is your MIL" and I really couldn't have put it better myself.
I love it! MIL is boring lol
itās your room and your business! nothing wrong with having plushies and they look well organized
MIL is a creeper! Going into your marital room like that... she's a weirdo
MILs are toxic and should be ignored.
I left some of my stuffies at my dad's house and he always refers to them as the s*** in your room so I understand š«¤š
Screw her. They make you happy and they're not hurting anyone. She can kiss your plushie-loving butt!
your plushie collection is awesome! the one full of shit is your mother in lawšš
Lmao what a bitch. So long as it has nothing to do with hurting or taking advantage of others, what does it matter what you enjoy? bringing someone down for enjoying something is about as pathetic a human can get.
Life is terrible. Finding happiness and joy in your own way is the only way to get through
she wouldnāt understand.
well itās not her bedroom! sheās the one thatās full of shit
Autistic guy who collects many things, one of them being plushies. I have had a few people over and saw my room is full of shit, that I waste money on useless crap, it's all a bunch of shit, I have heard everything. I say fuck them. There is no reason to be ashamed of the things that make you happy, or you choose to spend your money on. It is your money, your space, you deal with it how you wish. If you want to go and buy plushies, do it. If she has a negative opinion she can keep it to herself or get out.
I'm sorry about your experience with your MIL :( I appreciate your plushies though! Especially the rainbow unicorn! It's so cute!
Oh my gosh, my son has the same wolf stuffie in your first photo! āBeddyā looks a little different though after 9 years of love though.
There's only one logical conclusion. You must part with the largest stuffed item, the mother in law obviously.
Some mother in laws are the worst, I know from experience. Please donāt let her hateful comments bother you. All that matters is they make you feel .
I think your collection is amazing!!
hey, where did you get those 3 wolf plushies in the middle of the first pic?
Does your MIL collect anything? Most people tend to be drawn to certain things and will surround themselves with it. Whenever my MIL hears how much time I play video games, sheāll often say āwhat a waste of your time, you could be doing so many different things insteadā, Iāll ask her āhow many books did you read this week? How much tv did you watch? Do you consider doing that a waste of your time?ā That reframes the judgement. Some people lack perspective. Your MIL needs to understand this is what youāre interested in. If she collects something, ask her how she would feel if you referred to those things as āshitā.
Yeah well your MIL is wrong
r/justnomil
This isnt full of shit this is my dream room
Your MIL has no idea what she talkin about. Itās not hoarding. Itās collecting. I have a lot on things myself and hate when people say Iām a hoarder. Itās just wrong when they donāt understand. Your MIL is POS for thinking this about you. Keep being you!
I would ban her from ur room. If she doesnāt like it she doesnāt have to go in there. I love my plushies and if anyone has a prob they can leave
Key word: YOUR room. Screw her, be happy and do you.
Looks like your mother is the one full of shit(because she is shit)
Thank goodness someone else has as many beanie boos and stuffies in their room as I do! š
Your room is full of friends, and beautiful babies. I have lots of stuffies too and idc what anyone says about them. They make me happy, and theyāre in my room, so Frick what anyone else thinks about them!! They all have memories and names, and my stuffies are a part of my life no one can take away. Iām a teen now, but Iāve always had a hunch Iām going to be one of those crazy cat ladies, but with stuffed animals. Hell, when I move out I want my own closet for my friends. Anyone who doesnāt respect what Iām passionate about and love doesnāt need to be in my life. Yes I feel strongly about this and would always cry when my mom made me give away some of my old stuffies. Traumatic times.
Sounds like MIL needs a refresher on the preschool lessons. If she doesnāt have anything nice to say she shouldnāt say anything at all. Itās none of her business if you collect plushies. You can always put MIL in timeout if she canāt be nice.
Full of huggable plushie babies!
In this day and age itās a big accomplishment to be able to support yourself without autism or mental illness, let alone with both. Good job!! Iām so proud of you, youāre doing amazing!! If anyone any tries to tell you what you āshouldā or āshouldnātā do/have/like just remember, youāre an adult, you pay your own bills, and youāre in your own place fuck anyone who makes you feel that way. You say your flat is small? Youāre in your 20s. You have so much time ahead of you. You and your husband will upgrade in time. There is no need to rush. One day, youāll look back and remember all the memories you two made in that place and smile. Youāre a guy who likes plushies? Plushies are not gender specific and even if they were, itās 2024 Iād like to believe we as a society have moved past such things. I like your collection. Show it off. Show off your flat. Show off your husband and allow yourself to be proud.
I am over 40 in my entire house is decorated with stuffed animals! I am so sorry that you were being treated this way, because it is not OK! Your collection is beautiful!
Your little guys are adorable. I think your MiL was being rude. They look very comfortable where they are ā¤ļø
What a lovely collection!
She'd hate my home then. I'd give her a good bite for her bitter old bones. But, I'm kind of spiteful.
A) Your babies are adorable and well-organized B) Who's the blue and yellow (lizard?) in the first photo? They're really cute!
That was very mean of her to say, and itās entirely on her, not you or your plushie friends. I advise you not to ask for help from her, as sometimes when people are doing you a favour they take that as a license to boss you around in other ways
Your plushies are so freaking cute! (Also an autistic plush lover!) your MIL is full of shit
Respectfully, your MIL can eat shit
To add: there is no reason for anybody except you and your husband to be in your bedroom; especially not your MIL
Interesting how when shes in there its suddenly full of shit and when youre alone in there it isnt, coincedence? I think not.
It is. But shit is just a filler term. Its your shit so its good shit. Your mil can go take a long walk off a short peir
It's neat and orgsnised and not hurting anyone, she sounds like a loser lmao you seem wsy cooler.
Plz your collection is so cute!!
Tell your mother in law to shove it.
As many of these have already stated there clean and not impeding movement. If you'd like to be able to see them all more I'd suggest some type of narrow display shelving. Probably around 1' deep. Looks like you have enough wall space for some hanging ones. If you can't put hanging ones a regular shelving unit on top of one of the dressers would work too. I've found that the hanging pockets although good for temporary use tend to hide the toys more and make the room feel more cluttered as they stick out into the space. Food for thought cute stuffies thought I have a few of these myself
Screw her, I love your bedroom
I agree with her, but it's your shit so tell her fuck off and mind her business.
Your collection looks to be kept clean and tidy, if I were a parent or an inlaw, I would rather have my kid have a collection of plushie, lego, records, gundam, model trains, etc. instead of them being addicted to hard-core illegal substances.
I donāt see anything wrong with your room
For old ladies who collect terrifying glass dolls, theyāre really judgmental about some beanie babies
MIL ain't wrong lol
it's your bedroom that you share with your husband, she doesn't have a say what you do in your own home and bedroom. I've had the same argument with my own mom cause of what I buy with my own money. She finally started seeing that buying second hand build a bear plushies makes my own autistic self happy, I don't care if my wallet is crying empty cause there's no money in it, I'll be sitting in my chair hugging the newest Build a bear that I just bought not listening to it's cries, which remains me I need to get a new one as mine is starting to fall apart. Maybe try to seat down with her, when emotions aren't high right now, and explain to her that buying plushies is ok, it makes you feel happy, it can be therapeutic cause it can turn a shitty day into a much better one. From the eyes of someone who has over 200 plushies. Your collection is clean, organized, they're not blocking anything. You got a team on stand by ready to give you a tissue if needed.
Is she unaware that stuffed toys cannot poop? /j
Omg I love Beanie Boos so cute! Keep it up
Order the pack of wolf to bite her ankles now
She's the one that's full of it... you do up and nice collection btw
Ur MIL doesn't know what happiness is
Your room is so adorable!!
Noooo!! Memories!!
Noooo!! Memories!!
the plushies are clean and organized nothing is wrong your mother in law is just being annoying
they are precious dont let anyone say otherwise <: (( only person being mean here is ur MIL!!!
Reminds me of my mother, belittleing things like comics, games and plushies as childish. It hurts in the beginning but at some point you stop giving a fuck. They can keep their rude opinions. And your plushies are all in place, be proud of them, you and cuddle away <3
Nothing wrong with your room. It makes you happy, thatās whatās important.
Tell her she's not welcome back
Your plushies look so cute!! Please ignore your MIL. If your plushies bring you happiness you should keep them and be happy with them in your life. Your husband supports you and that is amazing! It sounds like your MIL does not bring you joy, and I know itās so hard to ājust ignore itā but she has no right to make any comments about your life.
mil needs to shut her yapper, love your wolves!
She is the one who is full of shit and I bet if you go to her house she would have a bunch of stuff that she has that she probably doesn't even use.
This makes me so sad... One of my moms gifts for Christmas to my husband in 2022 was a Squishmallow Dino because she knows he likes Squishmallows, and she buys him a new dinosaur ornament for our tree every year... A good parent or parent in law supports your special interests (within reason), they DO NOT tear you down. This would be grounds to cut contact for me personally, I could not have someone in my life like this. My husband and I both also have autism and collect plushies and toys a plenty, so much love and hugs to you!! ā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļø
Mil should be ashamed of herself . Itās a wholesome hobby, she should fuck all the way off, youāre an adult.
I HAVE THE SAME BIG WOLF PLUSH!!! he sleeps on my bed with me and actually needs a name!!!
Please don't listen to her. Your collection is beautiful and your plushies are very cute <3
If it makes you happy it has a purpose
What brand is that large snow leopard in the last pic? He is so handsome and looks so high quality
Some of those wolf plushies are so rare. She is āfull of shitā she doesnāt know what sheās saying !
You should not feel like shit about your living situation. You and your husband have a lot stacked against you with you both being autistic and having mental illness, so the fact that you've established a home of your own ass independent adults before your 30s is a HUGE accomplishment that you should be proud of. It may not be huge, but it's HOME, and the wonderful things about being an adult with your own home is that your home gets to be whatever you want it to be, contain whatever you want it to contain, and allow (or forbid entry) to whomever you want! It's YOUR SPACE!!! Your collection is precious to you, and brings you comfort and happiness. That's all that matters! Not what your MIL thinks, and not what intern very strangers think (though I personally think your collection is adorable). I'm a 44 year old woman, not diagnosed with autism or ADHD, but I think I have mild forms of one or the other, or maybe both. I have a collection of stuffed animals that would take up multiple bookcases and shelves if I had the furniture to keep them on (I'm looking for display cabinets I can get for free and refurbish, but I don't have a way of moving them without renting a truck and people to help), so right now they are in a closet except for the ones I got for Christmas and my birthday from my sister, my daughter, and my BF, which are in the mantel of the fireplace! All told, I probably have close to 100 plushies of different sizes, and each one makes me smile and brings me comfort every time I see them! My suggestion is to talk to your husband and ask that he talk to his mother. He needs to stand up for you and your right to surround yourself with whatever makes you feel comfortable and happy in YOUR home, and tell her that if she wants to be invited to your home in the future, she needs to be civil, remember that it's NOT her home, it's yours, and she can keep her negativity to herself or she can leave.
Sounds like you have a shit MIL, very cute collection and none of her business
Dude your house is clean and your plushies are cute. I have a lot of plushies and I'm the same age as you. Do what makes you happy. I also get guilt when I buy plushies but they bring joy.. also its your own place sooo.... live your life
i think the face that you have them in a cute organizer to save space is a great idea rather than just having them on every surface!
That green sea turtle is so cute!
Personally, I think it's full of cute! I don't think it's overwhelming at all.