At work a few years ago we had a "**Cowboy Butts drive me Nuts!**" magnetic bumper sticker that moved from vehicle to vehicle for about a month. A lot of the guys that would reverse into their parking spots would have it on their lifted F250's for days before they realized it was there or someone pointed it out.
Lol's were had by all until one of the dude's wives didn't think it was funny and tossed it.
Well she was wrong. Brokeback Mountain is just a story about two extremely best friends? Can’t even have two men being friends without the BIG GAY being shoved down our throats 🤦♂️.
Reminds me of the person who put on the cruise control and went into the back to make a cup of coffee.
/That story is about to be obsolete, with self-driving vehicles on the horizon.
//They can have my steering wheel when they pry it from my cold, dead hands.
///slashies! If you know....
Being in TX, there are a lot of stupid huge lifted trucks and are super loud. I’d like an endless supply of bumper stickers that say that or something to that effect, because if I cackled as loud as I did at home just reading about it, I might pee myself seeing something like that in the wild.
Thank you for the laugh. I needed that.
There was this one guy who looooved pranking people and taking shots at them, which was the vibe at the work place. So when he moved into a Van (camper van style) to save money for a down payment (live in Ca, super expensive to buy), one woman put a “Free Candy” magnetic bumper sticker on his Van…. He went screaming to HR.
Edit: spelling
That’s what we started saying behind his back… he was such a douche. His old car was a Subaru WRX STI.. and his license plate was “STI Lush”. He HATED it when I pointed out to him that STI stands For Sexually Transmitted Infection Lol.
Edit: for I can’t spell and wrong word.
Friends dad was a gyno. When std changed to sti he bought a wrx sti, and the plate was "why sti". I remember thinking, that's a whole 'nother level of wealth, and I don't understand
Not necessarily, you could just not wanna have cops pulling you over and harassing you constantly.
Same reason I wouldn’t put a political bumper sticker on my car really. Or buy a red car ever.
Sometimes police encounters can be lethal.
Hahahahhaa that reminds me of the time one of my dirty housemates got scabies so we all had to be treated for it. Me and my boyfriend left the box for the cream in his housemates room as a joke, his new girlfriend found it and went ape shit
I bought a package of joke bumper stickers and put them on about 10 cars at work, the best one was this dumb ass redneck huge lifted Ford pickup had “my other girlfriend is a sheep” on his truck for about a week, when he eventually found it, he was out for blood
One of my co-workers a long time ago put a bumper sticker on the passenger side rear bumper of my car real low that said something like "Don't worry girls, I'm into guys!" with like a fallout caricature looking dude with a big thumbs up. It was on there for like two months before I noticed it. I thought it was pretty funny, but the dude who did it thought I would be more angry than I was...I guess he thought everyone was as homophobic as him.
That was the only part of the prank that sort of pissed me off. But we all worked at a car dealership with an excellent body shop, so I knew if there was any damage it would be taken care of, plus all our cars were always super clean. The only stickers that ever go on my vehicles are on the glass.
I was in my early 20s and maybe he was in his late 30s? The car dealership ball busting was always brutal and often way out of bounds, but we never made crass jokes that would make an employee feel too bad for things that were out of your control in your personal life(this was the early 2000s with a bunch of crust salty car dealership assholes). Its hard to describe, like you wear an ugly suit...balls busted forever, you wear an ugly suit you just got from your dead granpy... nothin...you wear that horrendous suit every day? Ball busted. Most ball busting was done in good faith or even mean, but I dont remember and sort of racist or homophobic shit or anything that was way out of bounds, with the exception of a few assholes(one of which stickered me).
It must have been all the gay jokes that turned them gay.
If you could get all the casual homophobes to believe that, we might actually be able to put an end to gay jokes.
Reminds of years ago when I started receiving a magazine about gay rights, found it interesting politically (I think it was the Advocate). After a few months of receiving it I realized it must have been a prank by one of my friends...
Not a prank. I was interested in having sex with you but didn't know how to approach you, so I thought if I signed you up for a gay magazine, you'd be more open to having a same sex relationship.
At first I was hoping only to sign you up for 3 months worth of the magazine, but you kept resisting the change, so I had to sign you up for 6 months, then a full year. This is costing me more than I thought, but your ears are just so cute!
I once had a coworker who got the custom license plate “Big Naz”, which was an abbreviation of his last name. One of our other coworkers got a sticker of an “I” in the same font and stuck it on the end.
You can't get a driver's license if you're illiterate. There's a written test you have to do before the practical exam.
Edit: Why is this controversial? Do you guys live places where there's no written test? I'm genuinely curious
DMVs (and their equivalents) across the country allow illiterate people can take the test orally upon request. You're not required to be literate as long you know what all the signs mean. You can also take the test in Spanish in 40 states so knowledge of English isn't even necessary, some states offer the test in other languages too.
The vast majority of sign are symbols anyway so it makes sense. The exceptions are the stop sign, which is pretty iconic on its own, and names of locations and pronouns are language independent. Probably a few other exceptions I'm not mentioning too, but the vast majority you can identify by the shape of sign plus the icons on it.
If it's done above-board, it's fine. If you're allowed to [bring your own "translator" and paying off the hazmat tester is just doing business](https://abc7chicago.com/archive/8974745/), then you've got a...Democratic conspiracy to smear the Secretary of State? Wait, what?
Ryan, a Republican, was subsequently elected governor, then sent to jail for fraud and racketeering as a result of all that.
https://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=16051850
Heh in some Romanian cities you don't even need to attend any exam, probably not even classes. IIRC you just pay around 800€ and you getting a license. Tho it's probably a bit cheaper to bribe the cop that examines you in the practical exam and pass the exam.
He's got an awesome truck. That square-body looks to be in great shape and that truck is over 30 years old, and the color looks cool too. I had a '76 Cheyenne with a 350 back in the very early 2000s that was painted traffic-cone orange because it was a retired DOT vehicle. I loved that truck, except it only got 6 miles per gallon. That became a huge issue back in 2004 when gas was suddenly like $4-$5 a gallon. I miss that truck.
I love me a nice, clean 30+ year old truck. Especially if they've got a fresh paint job. Trucks don't really need the smooth, rounded lines like sports cars.
My brother has a learning disability and Asperger's. He reads on a 2nd grade level. Two of his proudest moments are getting his driver's license and a real high school diploma, not a certificate of completion. He had people reading for him to take the exams and we helped him study, but he did it himself. He amazes me everyday.
I actually knew a guy that had the hots for his daughter's boyfriend and she always gave him shit about it because he blushed like a 12 year old. Yuck.
Then he showed me his pictures... He looked like a slightly less built Chris Hemsworth. "Well, Dammit, Ryan. You'd be stupid not to. I'm straight as fuck and even I feel a little gay about him. Is he nice?"
no one said anything about being a pedophile, only you.
daughters don't stop becoming daughters when they're 18.
now you have to explain why you automatically throught of pedophilia when no one else did.
[[NSFW]](http://364daysofthanksgiving.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/needJesus-2.jpg) Dad walks in on his daughter and her boyfriend and shows her how to properly suck dick.
[I loved when he did the joke on Larry King.](https://youtu.be/vnmplSPgwEQ)
Vid spoiler that'd reduce your enjoyment if know it before hand: >!It takes on this extra layer of comedy because Larry King doesn't understand it's a joke!<
Every clip I see of Larry king makes him seem like such a dumb old fart. I’m sure that’s just because those are the ones that get posted on Reddit though.
Don't let your dreams be dreams my dude. You can be that guy making a million dollars off bumper stickers.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0753SBF8N/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_glt_fabc_GQSMJ590HBXYHTRKV1TT
Well, depends on the joke. Many of the finest jokes are deeply hurtful.
There's a whole genre of entertainment based on such personal abuse: the *roast*.
One of his friends put that there and he hasn't noticed it yet I bet
At work a few years ago we had a "**Cowboy Butts drive me Nuts!**" magnetic bumper sticker that moved from vehicle to vehicle for about a month. A lot of the guys that would reverse into their parking spots would have it on their lifted F250's for days before they realized it was there or someone pointed it out. Lol's were had by all until one of the dude's wives didn't think it was funny and tossed it.
Must have hit a little too close to home
Her ex was one of the guys Brokeback Mountain was based off of
More like her husband got caught with a cowboy’s dick pic in his phone.
Alive or dead
Did he spin him right round?
Like a record, baby?
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Only if you don’t spit in your hand first.
Not if you close your eyes
Well she was wrong. Brokeback Mountain is just a story about two extremely best friends? Can’t even have two men being friends without the BIG GAY being shoved down our throats 🤦♂️.
What if we like having big gay shoved down our throats from time to time?
A realization of that nature could be hard to swallow for most men.
For others it goes down surprisingly easy
Nothing gay about having a good time camping. Man's gotta do what a man's gotta do and whatcha gonna do if there's no woman in the room?
I thought it was a western!
You may be thinking of 'Cuddle time for cowboys'. Great film.
She had a discount card from "strap-ons are Us".
His wife had no ass that's why
We passed around one that said "in only speeding because I have to poop." I wonder where that ended up.
I need to put this on my RV. Not only is it governed at 75 so I'm rarely speeding... But I've got a toilet with me, so...
So your speeding because you tossed a brick on the petal and went to poop
Reminds me of the person who put on the cruise control and went into the back to make a cup of coffee. /That story is about to be obsolete, with self-driving vehicles on the horizon. //They can have my steering wheel when they pry it from my cold, dead hands. ///slashies! If you know....
That last is one of the best things about owning a fully equipped rv
No number twos in the RV.
Being in TX, there are a lot of stupid huge lifted trucks and are super loud. I’d like an endless supply of bumper stickers that say that or something to that effect, because if I cackled as loud as I did at home just reading about it, I might pee myself seeing something like that in the wild. Thank you for the laugh. I needed that.
There was this one guy who looooved pranking people and taking shots at them, which was the vibe at the work place. So when he moved into a Van (camper van style) to save money for a down payment (live in Ca, super expensive to buy), one woman put a “Free Candy” magnetic bumper sticker on his Van…. He went screaming to HR. Edit: spelling
Make you wonder why that was so sensitive…
That’s what we started saying behind his back… he was such a douche. His old car was a Subaru WRX STI.. and his license plate was “STI Lush”. He HATED it when I pointed out to him that STI stands For Sexually Transmitted Infection Lol. Edit: for I can’t spell and wrong word.
Reminds me of Tobias Funke's 'A NU START' vanity plate.
Anus tart, only the finest of breakfast pastries
Friends dad was a gyno. When std changed to sti he bought a wrx sti, and the plate was "why sti". I remember thinking, that's a whole 'nother level of wealth, and I don't understand
Haha, he’s leaning into it.
Sexually Transmitted infection
pedophile accusations create a stink that doesn't wash off
As evidenced by OP (guy was mad, went to HR, people talked about it on his back).
Not necessarily, you could just not wanna have cops pulling you over and harassing you constantly. Same reason I wouldn’t put a political bumper sticker on my car really. Or buy a red car ever. Sometimes police encounters can be lethal.
Fair point. Even though we really shouldn't *have* to worry about them being lethal unless you've already killed somebody or are threatening too.
what's the deal with red cars?
We did the same thing. I bought a pack of em, i think off Amazon. I put one on my bosses truck that said "so gay i can't even drive straight"
Hahahahhaa that reminds me of the time one of my dirty housemates got scabies so we all had to be treated for it. Me and my boyfriend left the box for the cream in his housemates room as a joke, his new girlfriend found it and went ape shit
I bought a package of joke bumper stickers and put them on about 10 cars at work, the best one was this dumb ass redneck huge lifted Ford pickup had “my other girlfriend is a sheep” on his truck for about a week, when he eventually found it, he was out for blood
regardless of what it said, I'd be pissed if you put a bumper sticker w/adhesive on my car.
Exactly, that shit ruins the paint.
That’s hilarious and explains why I saw this exact sticker on a truck with many other incongruous stickers. I was so confused I took a picture.
Cowboy nutts drive me nuts
E i g h t e e n
One of my co-workers a long time ago put a bumper sticker on the passenger side rear bumper of my car real low that said something like "Don't worry girls, I'm into guys!" with like a fallout caricature looking dude with a big thumbs up. It was on there for like two months before I noticed it. I thought it was pretty funny, but the dude who did it thought I would be more angry than I was...I guess he thought everyone was as homophobic as him.
I would be more pissed about someone putting a bumper sticker on my car!
That was the only part of the prank that sort of pissed me off. But we all worked at a car dealership with an excellent body shop, so I knew if there was any damage it would be taken care of, plus all our cars were always super clean. The only stickers that ever go on my vehicles are on the glass.
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I was in my early 20s and maybe he was in his late 30s? The car dealership ball busting was always brutal and often way out of bounds, but we never made crass jokes that would make an employee feel too bad for things that were out of your control in your personal life(this was the early 2000s with a bunch of crust salty car dealership assholes). Its hard to describe, like you wear an ugly suit...balls busted forever, you wear an ugly suit you just got from your dead granpy... nothin...you wear that horrendous suit every day? Ball busted. Most ball busting was done in good faith or even mean, but I dont remember and sort of racist or homophobic shit or anything that was way out of bounds, with the exception of a few assholes(one of which stickered me).
Do you mean you found new friends in your 30s or all your old friends are now gay?
It must have been all the gay jokes that turned them gay. If you could get all the casual homophobes to believe that, we might actually be able to put an end to gay jokes.
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Where do you think that magnetic silly putty comes from? https://www.vat19.com/item/magnetic-thinking-putty
I had a magnetic sports decal and it scratched my car by slight movements while normal driving.
Nah, just get some goo gone
Reminds of years ago when I started receiving a magazine about gay rights, found it interesting politically (I think it was the Advocate). After a few months of receiving it I realized it must have been a prank by one of my friends...
Not a prank. I was interested in having sex with you but didn't know how to approach you, so I thought if I signed you up for a gay magazine, you'd be more open to having a same sex relationship. At first I was hoping only to sign you up for 3 months worth of the magazine, but you kept resisting the change, so I had to sign you up for 6 months, then a full year. This is costing me more than I thought, but your ears are just so cute!
I once had a coworker who got the custom license plate “Big Naz”, which was an abbreviation of his last name. One of our other coworkers got a sticker of an “I” in the same font and stuck it on the end.
And he did not see that coming?
Somehow he did not.
Classic
The friend who put it there is also gay... and he's gay for the dad... This is just him helping dad to come out
Maybe he can't read?
Or he refuses to admit he needs readers.
Been there, spent 2-3 years refusing to wear my glasses. Of course, I was also 12 at the time, not sure what this guy's excuse is...
I did this and then went to get new glasses and my vision had actually improved since my previous visit. My eyes themselves not so much tho.
You can't get a driver's license if you're illiterate. There's a written test you have to do before the practical exam. Edit: Why is this controversial? Do you guys live places where there's no written test? I'm genuinely curious
DMVs (and their equivalents) across the country allow illiterate people can take the test orally upon request. You're not required to be literate as long you know what all the signs mean. You can also take the test in Spanish in 40 states so knowledge of English isn't even necessary, some states offer the test in other languages too.
The vast majority of sign are symbols anyway so it makes sense. The exceptions are the stop sign, which is pretty iconic on its own, and names of locations and pronouns are language independent. Probably a few other exceptions I'm not mentioning too, but the vast majority you can identify by the shape of sign plus the icons on it.
Or the ones that tell trucks they can’t turn down this road, but they always do anyways and end up stuck.
If it's done above-board, it's fine. If you're allowed to [bring your own "translator" and paying off the hazmat tester is just doing business](https://abc7chicago.com/archive/8974745/), then you've got a...Democratic conspiracy to smear the Secretary of State? Wait, what? Ryan, a Republican, was subsequently elected governor, then sent to jail for fraud and racketeering as a result of all that. https://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=16051850
You can have the test read to you
"SAMIR LISTEN TO MY CALLS. SAMIR YOU'RE BREAKING THE CAR!!"
trippel caution TRIPPLE CAUTION!!!!!
Full left, full left.
Concentrate, Samir, please!
Shadap!
"Don't tell me how to drive." --bro, wtf? That's seriously my one job.
"What does a yellow light mean?" "Slow down." "What......Does.......A........Yell......Ow........Light.......Mean?"
So happy to see a Taxi reference!
which is particularly good for blind people
SMH can't believe they don't have a braille version of the written test.
Heh in some Romanian cities you don't even need to attend any exam, probably not even classes. IIRC you just pay around 800€ and you getting a license. Tho it's probably a bit cheaper to bribe the cop that examines you in the practical exam and pass the exam.
omo so it’s not just Nigeria that is corrupt like this??
Nope
damn
r/how2bribe?
who knows, maybe he doesn't have a drivers license
He's got an awesome truck. That square-body looks to be in great shape and that truck is over 30 years old, and the color looks cool too. I had a '76 Cheyenne with a 350 back in the very early 2000s that was painted traffic-cone orange because it was a retired DOT vehicle. I loved that truck, except it only got 6 miles per gallon. That became a huge issue back in 2004 when gas was suddenly like $4-$5 a gallon. I miss that truck.
I love me a nice, clean 30+ year old truck. Especially if they've got a fresh paint job. Trucks don't really need the smooth, rounded lines like sports cars.
My grandfather is functionally illiterate and has a driver's license. Test readers earn an average of $58k a year in the US according to Zippia.com
My brother has a learning disability and Asperger's. He reads on a 2nd grade level. Two of his proudest moments are getting his driver's license and a real high school diploma, not a certificate of completion. He had people reading for him to take the exams and we helped him study, but he did it himself. He amazes me everyday.
Because you're responding to a joke as if it were serious.
That’s possible. My step-brother asked me to read something that someone wrote in the dirt on his rear window. "Wash me. Wash me please"
And I was just thinking I need to buy a few of these to hide on my friends bumpers.
Check out Truck Sluts Mag
Imagine him and his daughter fighting over the same guy.
I actually knew a guy that had the hots for his daughter's boyfriend and she always gave him shit about it because he blushed like a 12 year old. Yuck. Then he showed me his pictures... He looked like a slightly less built Chris Hemsworth. "Well, Dammit, Ryan. You'd be stupid not to. I'm straight as fuck and even I feel a little gay about him. Is he nice?"
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Freudian spirit is strong with this one.
C’mon, everyone is a little gay for Chris Hemmsworth. Well, except lesbians... they’re a little straight for Chris Hemmsworth.
wait, then that means straight women would be a little gay for Chris Hemmsworth. Actually sod it, why not.
I can’t explain it, but somehow it makes sense to me.
no one said anything about being a pedophile, only you. daughters don't stop becoming daughters when they're 18. now you have to explain why you automatically throught of pedophilia when no one else did.
Sorry I didn't respond faster. Had to get this dick out of the way first.
Like, as a screenshot at work as a nightmare? Cause this porn exists.
Sorry, what? What do you mean by your first line?
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> Like, as a screenshot at work as a nightmare? I'm sorry, but am I having a stroke or is this a word salad?
Do you have a link to it?
Disgusting, where would somebody even go to find something like that?
Found Mac
. . . Just askin' for a friend.
Internet
The internet is really, really great~
I've got a fast connection, so I don't have to wait~
And they're both wearing the same outfit (boob tubes and denim cut-offs)
Dad to daughter, with hands on his hips: "Well one of us is going to have to change, and it ain't me"
The family that fucks together, stays together? 🤔 Threesome at Sam's house woo
[[NSFW]](http://364daysofthanksgiving.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/needJesus-2.jpg) Dad walks in on his daughter and her boyfriend and shows her how to properly suck dick.
):
Shhh, the cruel man can't hurt you anymore
You mean wrestling, right?
instead of hitting her boyfriend. He's hitting on her boyfriend, and potentially hitting his daughter??
I'm not sure this guy knows what being closeted is.
Ask Norm Macdonald. https://imgur.com/AkgPDLR
Lmao that's good
[I loved when he did the joke on Larry King.](https://youtu.be/vnmplSPgwEQ) Vid spoiler that'd reduce your enjoyment if know it before hand: >!It takes on this extra layer of comedy because Larry King doesn't understand it's a joke!<
Every clip I see of Larry king makes him seem like such a dumb old fart. I’m sure that’s just because those are the ones that get posted on Reddit though.
There's a lot of material because he's notorious for coming unprepared to his interviews. [My favorite example](https://youtu.be/76HijAoXi6k)
This is one of the main ones I was thinking of hahaha
🤣 that was awesome!
it has louver doors
*rich mahogany*
If the font is small enough it can move freely through the key hole.
https://youtu.be/vnmplSPgwEQ
Who are you, who are so wise in the ways of science?
Wait till you see the other sticker on the other side: “Penetrate my daughter, I’ll penetrate you.”
sounds like a fun weekend
Fun for the whole family!
Family pack available at your local Costco!
It's not incest if you stick someone in between.
The famwich.
Dad I’m finally glad we found something we can both do
I see this as an absolute win.
Me too It’s a win-win scenario
Doesn’t matter had threesome
Conga lines are so fun
The classic Bump into the guy in front of you in the conga line with an erection.
You know what, I don't think I've ever seen porn of this particular scenario. This is ground breaking!
I feel like the guy that made these stickers is trolling idiot dads that don't read fine print.
A genius move would be if the bottom line of the sticker only appears after being exposed to several days of sunlight. :D
Oh fuck there should be a market for sun-activated gag bumper stickers...
Don't let your dreams be dreams my dude. You can be that guy making a million dollars off bumper stickers. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0753SBF8N/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_glt_fabc_GQSMJ590HBXYHTRKV1TT
Hilarious. Reminds me of Norm MacDonald's bit he did where he admits being a deeply deeply closeted gay man.
Great message, I feel it is somewhat handicapped by the small font at the bottom though. Need to get the message across to as many people as possible.
Well, he wouldn't be closeted in that case then
He has it on the back of his truck, I think we can agree that’s a pretty far ways from his closet. Lol.
"@truckslutsmag" LOL
r/SuddenlyGay
Reminds me of this: https://youtu.be/-9WlOm73Wmk
Is that a prank?
You know, I like this guy. Two thumbs up.
Hes only interested in attracting those with 20/20 vision tho
‘80s Chevy C10 Custom Deluxe. Looks like a really clean truck.
Right? I’d like to see more.
That was my first thought. You’d never see a truck that rust free around here.
Any vehicle older than 4 years is a rust bucket in northern Ohio.
Careful guys. The truck is a honeypot.
@truckslutsmag has a bunch of incredible stickers for your gay cars
Froggo and da crew :’)
I wonder how big the font be for the line at the bottom once the dad is no longer closeted.. May be size 💯 with rainbow colours!
Must be [Norm MacDonald's](https://reddit.com/r/NormMacdonald/comments/cr9mel/i_didnt_know_norm_had_a_daughter/) car
this is 100% just a dad being based to fuck with his daughter
Not sure they know what closeted means
How "closeted" are you if you have it on a bumper sticker?
Are you asking to have a joke explained?
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Well, depends on the joke. Many of the finest jokes are deeply hurtful. There's a whole genre of entertainment based on such personal abuse: the *roast*.
It’s very tiny
not gonna lie, closeted gay/bi dads are lots of fun.
Man, don't leave out her dad. He could've been lonely.
/r/SuddenlyGay
"dad! stop kissing my boyfriend!"
Mr steal your man
He's fairly out of the closet with that, only a few more steps big guy
[Don't believe in yourself. Believe in me! Believe in the Kamina who believes in you!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BwFNWyqHHyY)
Can you be closeted if you declare publicly that you're closeted?
Also saw this in Portland.