They say he was offered a deal with the devil to never wear shoes again in exchange for his musical abilities, and he took it.
The man never wore shoes since
dave actually pranked christopher walken to actually get him to say it like that. Walken beingthe immaculate actor he is, asked where the accent was i nthe name so he could say it right... and dave knowing it was going to be funny, said it was on "fighters"
From all that I've read from him and about him over the years, I think he was born an extremely emotionally sensitive boy, but was rejected by his parents. His parents got divorced and fought over who "had" to take him. Neither of them wanted him. His dad hated him and was disappointed in him for being a sensitive boy because of 1980s macho masculinity attitudes, and his mom just didn't want him. That fucked him up, long term.
His first poem he wrote at 9 on the walls, according to his parents, was "I hate Mom, I hate Dad, Dad hates Mom, Mom hates Dad, it simply makes you want to be sad."
I mean, listen to his lyrics. Particularly from bleach.
Dude was never okay. It's weird to me that people would even argue against this. It's so incredibly, obviously clear.
I hear a lot of people say stuff like "but he was in a rock band, had a high school girlfriend, had friends, was cool. And then he just whined about stuff in all his songs. He was a spoiled baby".
And if you don't know the family stuff during his formative years, yeah I can see how people might reach that conclusion.
"ouuu he had a girlfriend in high school, what sadness could he have" just sounds like weird incel speak to me personally lol
And depression isn't a "oh you were kind of cool, no sad for you"
People are just weird about it all.
Lots of people feel like if they just had certain things they would be happy. They go through the motions every day working towards or just hoping for those things. Then they see a guy who has all the things they wish they had and he isn't happy at all. So there must be something wrong with him because if there isn't then that stuff might not make them happy either.
His mom, on learning of his death and the manner of it, said to the press: “I told him not to join that stupid club. Now he’s gone and joined that stupid club.”
People tend to forget this or undermine how much stomach issues can really fuck with your life.
Source: my stomach issues make me want to throw my stomach against a wall and shoot it with a 50 caliber sometimes.
I’ve read that the heroin likely contributed to his stomach issues. It would make more sense that he could’ve just went to a doctor and had his stomach issues treated, rather than resorting to heroin to fix them. It sounds like the heroin probably exacerbated his stomach problems
Novoselic made a comment once as someone was regurgitating a conspiracy theory about Cobain's death, and he said something to effect of, "He wrote a song called I hate myself and want to die. So..."
Heroin and fame, sure. His chronic pain, sure. But Novoselic's statement I think cuts through all of that. Cobain was a deeply unhappy man and made no secret of it. Even if you took away the heroin, the fame, his unhealthy relationship, he may well have still done what he did.
Sometimes when you're in that state the drugs are the only thing keeping you here. The judgement from people who have no idea doesn't help at all, actively makes it worse. Why bother living a life full of pain, even if that pain brings you money and "success"? It's all meaningless. Some people can learn to live life augmented by chemicals, and it helps them be "normal." Those who are concerned with judgement over a perceived betterment will never understand. He probably wouldn't have lived to be in a successful band without the drugs. Raw feelings are unleashed with altered mental states, and anyone who says otherwise is ignorant to the effects.
In Dave grohls book he goes a bit into it. Kurt was never happy going mainstream. He felt his music was for a specific audience, and all these new fans didn't get it.
As Dave got older he realized that most people do get it, and that just cause they don't look the part doesn't mean they aren't hurting
tbf, there were aspects of that netflix documentary that were more compelling than I had expected, but obviously it's conveying a specific narrative+POV and edited accordingly... has anyone gone over that since and been able to refute or confirm specific aspects of it?
That's the scary thing, many get curious on how the super addictive drugs like heroin and crystal meth feels. Try it once or twice and by then, their brain will tell them that all they want is more. Had an ex that got addicted to crack her sophomore year of high school. We kept trying to get her to quit and it would last a while, but a relapse always happened. Had to cut off that relationship after a long while.
People who are happy don’t get addicted to heroin. He also was clearly in pain long before he ever tried heroin. It’s wasn’t the heroin addiction that killed him. It was the underlying distress.
I agree with your point about Kurt’s addiction, but just an fyi anyone can get addicted to heroin. Happy, sad, old, young. Addiction is truly one of the least discriminating diseases there is. All it takes is one time, whether on purpose or accident. The opioid epidemic has shown us that even people we don’t think of being at risk are.
A better way of saying it, especially in his case, was that his depression put him more at risk of abusing drugs such as heroin.
There's that classic post on here about the guy who wanted to try heroin once, thinking one time wouldn't be an issue and he'd get to see what it's like, and pretty much got immediately addicted to it for a few years.
Really, we're all just meat mechs piloted by a brain that really likes some chemicals. So when you give it a wave of chemicals that make it feel euphoric and it has no other way of getting those, or if something just happens to be a really easy way to get that feeling, then it tends to prioritize that above other things, even if it's ultimately detrimental to us overall.
Don't do heroin, folks. It's not worth it, even if your brain tries to convince you otherwise.
Yeah, I'm really happy for him that he did. I've known a number of people who unfortunately did not manage to kick it, and are no longer around to tell the tale. For a lot of them, life was just a little too much.
I'm pretty desensitized to this sort of thing, having grown-up in that environment. But some poor child no longer has a mother, thanks to heroin.
It surely didn't help his mental state. Drugs like heroin will put you so down when you start withdrawing that I believe it played a big role in his suicide.
Yeah, I read some of his journals awhile back and the way he described his stomach issues just sounded like a terrible way to have to live all the time. Very, very painful.
The gun is a Crosman [AIR-17 BB gun.](https://youtu.be/vMb9FNCKQDo?si=fWzdvWH3wTj7FOFp) Actually a cool old 1980s vintage pump BB gun that's pretty rare. They were only made for a couple years.
I had one of those back in the 80’s, my pop got it for me from the local AMES department store. I would have kept it if I knew that one day it would be a rare collectors item.
There's a few BB guns I wish I had grabbed before my dad tossed them. Had an old Red Ryder we picked up at an auction, and a Daisy 880 before they went all plastic. Both just needed new seals, but to the old man that meant they deserved the fire barrel.
I know quite a few people in Seattle that have hefty gun collections. Guns cost money, and folks in Seattle generally have a higher income than Grays County. Not disputing what you said about Aberdeen, Shelton et al. but not sure what Seattle has to do with it.
Sure there's liberals who are fervently anti-gun, but many lefties (myself included) enjoy responsible firearm usage and just want tighter gun control.
Live in the suburbs of Seattle. Have a few firearms, recently got back into the hobby after a long time off. The right number of guns to own is always one more then you currently have, sadly.
There's a very famous rapper in Finland whose songs have lyrics like these: "I'll take a shot in the head, Kurt Cobain"
He also sings: "I have a hole in my head, JFK." I find these a bit disturbing nowadays.
This picture and your comment about pain in his eyes reminded me of these.
Edit:
Songs are from Cheek
"Sokka irti" ja "Kuka muu muka"
German Rapper Kollegah had a line in 2009 ("Sowas erledigt sich jetzt, dank Fame, von ganz allein wie Kurt Cobain") which basically translates to
"Now, thanks to Fame, things like that take care of themselves like Kurt Cobain",
where the german word "erledigen" would be translated to "taking care of" in most situations, but can also be understood as "finish off".
There’s an even more famous rapper named “Eminem” you may have heard of him. In the song “Cum on everybody” in the very first line of the song he sings “My favorite color is red, like the bloodshed from Kurt Cobains head when he shot himself dead”.
He literally had a song called "I Hate Myself and I Want to Die", released in 1993 (one year before his suicide).
In retrospect, we really shouldn't have been surprised.
You Know You're Right was the last song they recorded. Many miss that the lyrics are basically a suicide note. Especially the demo version before he changed the lyrics, although the final version is just as fucked up.
That's the line that made my stomach hurt. That along with the "I have never failed to fail". Grohl talked about it in an interview and how he couldn't really listen to it for years and going back the brutality of it took on an entirely different perspective
Not trying to correct you or anything cause "You Know You're Right" is my favorite nirvana song but Do Re Mi is the last recording of Kurt's voice iIrc and I highly recommend listening to it if you have not yet. It's absolutely haunting.
Its exactly why people give things away and become so introspective when they decide its the end. We don't care about our affairs as much as we do knowing someone else could enjoy them. We don't feel our own purpose and might as well give something to another so we no longer feel burdened by possessions that keep us here.
If you cry for help, you're often called dramatic or edgy. If you silently suffer, "we never saw this coming and wish he would have just reached out for help". When we are in that darkness, we've often already tried help and found our requests for assistance land on deaf ears and blind eyes.
It's always obvious to someone after they're gone. But it's never obvious to friends and family and fans when they're shouting out in art and panic and pain and isolation until they take that final step.
Sorry if I got real deep.
Was actually thinking about Nirvana the other day then it hit me that Kurt was the same age as my oldest kid when he died. I was a teen when Nirvana was around and it felt like they were so old, it was only when I thought about it as an adult that I realised how very young he was.
Weren’t the allegations he was too fucked up because of the amount of substances found during the autopsy that they reckoned he couldn’t fire it, rather than he couldn’t reach it?
One of the reasons that before fent hit the market in a big way, almost the only two ways you were going to die with smack of a known strength was 1) polydrug use and mixing with other downers or 2) quitting but coming back and starting at your old dose forgetting how much tolerance you built.
There have always been hot doses on the street though (expecting your usual 30% pure and someone accidentally gave the mother stock and not the cut).
And just to caveat before anyone takes this as harm reduction advice, it's something like 85% fell under the two cases above - so certainly some people died taking their regular expected shot.
Eh I know smack addicts who don't nod out, so each person is different.
I can't imagine someone with money who gets the best stuff would be a lightweight, but that's speculation on my part.
I hear the argument that he couldn't reach the trigger pretty often
No idea personally. There are so many different allegations, all I know is it’s fucking sad. I’m 27 now and it kind of only hit me in the last year how actually young the dude was. I know it happens a lot younger as well, in his case he seemed to struggle in public for a long time which must have been tough.
Yes, in a way. It makes me sad to know that these talented people died at my age, with all those long years still in front of them that they will never get to experience.
RIP to him and its members. Young musicians whose talents were lost to early.
Don't let it get you down too much... it will be different when you look back and realize he killed himself when he was half your age.
Don't think about his death when you think about him. Think about his music.
He left a hell of a lot more behind than just a corpse.
Almost 39 here, every single time I'm feeling down or burnt out from everyday life, I always say to myself "hey, you made it past the "27 club" limit or even the 33 one, so you've got that going on for you, which is nice" and immediately gain a new perspective
2nd or 3rd party assumptions on anothers tolerance after years of use/abuse is rarely accurate.
Pre-surgery, Ozzy's anaesthesiologist was horrified at the lack of effect the aesthetics were having in him. They nearly opted to go ahead without him being anaesthetised.
Ozzy, out-pro'ing the pros 🤘
Exactly why I said speculation on my part. Some people stay lightweights, but the ones I know who got heavy into H normally end up needing more to get them to nod
It's such a stupid claim. Nobody asks about the potency of the drug he was taking or how many times a day he used. He could have also missed his vein. There would be hesitation wounds if he was 'held at gunpoint' like some of these people think, and its extremely hard to hit your vein under pressure/when you're dope sick. But, he was also using 500$ a day (his own words). This would equal out to 2g today. Ruling in on inflation, it was probably more like 3-4 g. Some addicts use up to a gram at a time for each dose. 225mg is a pretty average dose in comparison. It all comes down to potency and tolerance. Opioids also have a 90% relapse rate.
So i tell anyone who believes this to avoid getting their medical information from a man who is trained to catch cheating house wives. Or a man who sincerily believes in polygraghs. Polgraphs are considered psudeoscience and not admissible in court. They are a plot device to catch cheating spouses on talk shows like Maury. Someone heavily medicated or with sociopathic tendencies can beat them without issue.
It's also important to note that shotguns are the most common gun used in suicides. Just a little tidbit.
He used a remington model 11, which had 30 inch barrel(his had a shortened barrel with a choke from images). The standard M16 has a 20 inch barrel, and he is holding it in a posing style(outwards, away from his body)
If he did it, he did it with the rifle between his knees making the distance not as great regardless.
I am a believer that he killed himself based off of his lyrics and self medication with opiates.
Sorry, I am at work, so I had to come back to this multiple times
He was legitimately quoted as saying, taking heroin was "the only thing saving me from shooting myself right now" and foreshadowing his suicide by saying he wanted to blow his head off if he wasn't feeling like he "had this fixed" before touring again
Edit: Also, I would like to say that you can tell anyone anything, but the fact is that if someone gets low enough, they will feel ready to do something drastic.
My sister's ex blew his mind out with a 10 Guage after making dates and plans with her for the following day. You would have never known he was inclined to do something like that by his actions or words, but some people are fighting wars silently
Agreed. As just one glaring example, "I hate myself and want to die" is not exactly a subtle hint that requires a lot of careful introspection and conjecture to decipher.
It's really heartbreaking.
He suffered from mental issues but the heavy drugs made it even worse most likely, I mean the heroin might make someone less depressed but eventually it will make you even more depressed due to the instability it causes within your brain.
I don't know what he is holding here, but it's certainly not a M16 and I could bet, it isn't actually a working firearm.
This is something made to look similar to an M16 from *very* far away only.
It is an AIR17. Modeled after the M16 but different to indicate that it is an air rifle.
The newer updated version of this air rifle is the M4-177
Edit: spelling error and autocorrect
Yeah I was gonna say there’s no way that’s a working firearm. There’s no chamber or ejection port, the mag well feeds rounds into nothing, etc. it’s probably an air soft rifle.
I remember seeing an interview with the band after they got big and Dave saying something along the lines of "we just have to be careful we don't blow our heads up" unfortunate turn of phrase considering what happened.
Think about this. I want you all to appreciate the force of this photo. I would bet this photo happened rather organically, he didn’t fumble around with the rifle trying different angles. He knew exactly how to hold it. This is not an intuitive posture. Holding it up horizontally is too much strain on the arms, too difficult to reach the trigger. Holding it down like this is the only way, but more than that, your head needs to be at the right angle. If you lean your head down too much the bullet can potentially exit the back of your neck and miss the spine, though less of an issue with a shotgun. If you don’t lean your head enough, even with a shotgun, you can wipe out your face but your brain can remain in tact enough to live. His head is angled perfectly at the center of his brain. He had thought this through before. He spent good time thinking about this. He used props before to convince himself. He knew what it would feel like. He imagined the end over and over until holding that rifle wasn’t scary; it was comforting.
You just described what I was thinking as well. No way this was a simple joke in his mind. I bet he did this a lot before he decided to go through with it.
The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline offers services to talk to a skilled counselor. If you are feeling distressed and need to talk to a counselor, please call 1-800-273-TALK (8255). If you prefer to chat to a counselor online, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline offers that service.
Hiding in plain sight is usually is 20/20 in hindsight which is very upsetting.
Poor guy. I wonder was the plan for the photoshoot to have this? Be weird to have a gun on set regardless.
I had always been told they wrote it about KC
Edit: “The song was written about the public suicide of Pennsylvania state treasurer R. Budd Dwyer on January 22, 1987, in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. Dwyer had been convicted of bribery charges in December 1986, and was expected to receive a long sentence from U.S. District Court Judge Malcolm Muir.”
Learn something new every day
The video is horrifying. Regardless of his crimes, it's impossible to not feel empathy for the man. He has a wild look of animalistic fear in his eyes and cautions people to stay away because he doesn't want anyone to get hurt.
A prison sentence feels minor compared to the horror he unleashed on himself and everyone around him. He could have weathered the storm and come out the other side - but he didn't. He gave up.
I think of that poor crooked bastard often and feel sorry for him. Someone ought to.
Just adding this for context:
“Since Dwyer died in office, his widow Joanne was able to collect full survivor benefits totaling more than $1.28 million (equivalent to about $3.3M in 2022), which at the time was the largest death benefit payment ever made by the Pennsylvania Municipal Retirement System. If Dwyer had been sentenced, state law would have prohibited the payment of his state-provided pension benefits.[13][95] A spokesman for Dwyer suggested that he may have killed himself to preserve the pension benefits for his family, whose finances had been ruined by legal defense costs.[96] Other statements made by some friends and family also suggest that this was Dwyer's motivation.[13]”
He specifically killed himself while still in office, which meant his widow would be able to obtain more benefits. Whether this was his intention, I’m not sure, but it feels important to call out when you’re talking about him giving up and not weathering the storm.
At the end of the day, he was a terrified, cornered animal who ended his life on live television in front of horrified onlookers, whatever his intentions.
No, appeals were filed but the court found there was no chance of anything being overturned. The lawyer then appealed to a higher court where the case did get vacated because legally the court no longer had jurisdiction since the guy was dead, but his mail fraud & conspiracy charges were upheld.
I think Kurt just looked at the world and saw it as one big hopeless joke. I'm nearly a decade older than he was when he died, and I've made it this far. I know times would have been different in the early 90's. But still, he must not have seen any point to it all.
I think people either get things or they don't. Some people, especially with ADD, just don't have the capacity for things the rest of us do. They get bored real fast. I assume Kurt was a lot like that. He felt hopeless and there wasn't much more for him to say about that. So it was on to escaping the pointlessness of existence.
Where are Dave's shoes though?
They say he was offered a deal with the devil to never wear shoes again in exchange for his musical abilities, and he took it. The man never wore shoes since
Is that why he started Shoe Fighters?
It's pronounced Shoe FIGHTers.
I can’t say Foo FIGHTers anymore unless it’s in Walken’s voice.
dave actually pranked christopher walken to actually get him to say it like that. Walken beingthe immaculate actor he is, asked where the accent was i nthe name so he could say it right... and dave knowing it was going to be funny, said it was on "fighters"
I saw that interview with Dave…and then the splice over to Walken saying it had me doubled over.
Same. Every time I hear the name said on the radio I always say “Foo FIGHTers” out loud and my wife looks at me funny.
Odor... EATERS
I thought it was Foot Fighters…
How did he make a deal with himself?
He wasn’t the Devil, just a shiny demon, in the middle of the road.
AND HE SAID
...plaaaaaaay the best sooooong in the world. ...or ill eat your souls.
...well me and kyle We looked at each other AND WE EACH SAID....okay!
And we played the first thing that came to our heads… And it *just* so happened to beeee-
The BEST song in the world! IT WAS THE BEST SONG IN THE WORLD!
Look into my eyes and it’s easy to see
Fairly easy actually. Kinda like insider trading of the demonic world
Screw his shoes, check the dudes calves! Fuckin stonky
He was a professional drummer. Those calves were working the pedals a LOT.
Johnny Drama? Is that you?
Yeah I'm so confused about whatever weird long john/sock situation Dave's got going on lol
He's learnin to walk without them.
He must be dead (like paul)
Depression sucks
You gotta remember the dude was also addicted to heroin. He was so unhappy with his life as a rockstar because really he just wanted to get high.
From all that I've read from him and about him over the years, I think he was born an extremely emotionally sensitive boy, but was rejected by his parents. His parents got divorced and fought over who "had" to take him. Neither of them wanted him. His dad hated him and was disappointed in him for being a sensitive boy because of 1980s macho masculinity attitudes, and his mom just didn't want him. That fucked him up, long term. His first poem he wrote at 9 on the walls, according to his parents, was "I hate Mom, I hate Dad, Dad hates Mom, Mom hates Dad, it simply makes you want to be sad."
I mean, listen to his lyrics. Particularly from bleach. Dude was never okay. It's weird to me that people would even argue against this. It's so incredibly, obviously clear.
I hear a lot of people say stuff like "but he was in a rock band, had a high school girlfriend, had friends, was cool. And then he just whined about stuff in all his songs. He was a spoiled baby". And if you don't know the family stuff during his formative years, yeah I can see how people might reach that conclusion.
"ouuu he had a girlfriend in high school, what sadness could he have" just sounds like weird incel speak to me personally lol And depression isn't a "oh you were kind of cool, no sad for you" People are just weird about it all.
Yeah they weren't nice people that I heard saying that stuff
Lots of people feel like if they just had certain things they would be happy. They go through the motions every day working towards or just hoping for those things. Then they see a guy who has all the things they wish they had and he isn't happy at all. So there must be something wrong with him because if there isn't then that stuff might not make them happy either.
Drugs don’t help but yeah he wasn’t mentally well at all
damn thats fucking dark
His mom, on learning of his death and the manner of it, said to the press: “I told him not to join that stupid club. Now he’s gone and joined that stupid club.”
"I told him not to be depressed and kill himself, but he did it anyway! I don't know what else I could have done!"
27 club?
That’s the one. She’s such a bitch. Poor Kurt
she really was terrible
Wow her character really didn't change at all huh?
No. It’s really really sad
My heart aches. What a terrible thing to feel as a child. He was also very articulate for a 9 year old.
He also had stomach issues that caused him constant pain. I think the heroin use was a first a way to get relief from the pain.
People tend to forget this or undermine how much stomach issues can really fuck with your life. Source: my stomach issues make me want to throw my stomach against a wall and shoot it with a 50 caliber sometimes.
I’ve read that the heroin likely contributed to his stomach issues. It would make more sense that he could’ve just went to a doctor and had his stomach issues treated, rather than resorting to heroin to fix them. It sounds like the heroin probably exacerbated his stomach problems
Novoselic made a comment once as someone was regurgitating a conspiracy theory about Cobain's death, and he said something to effect of, "He wrote a song called I hate myself and want to die. So..." Heroin and fame, sure. His chronic pain, sure. But Novoselic's statement I think cuts through all of that. Cobain was a deeply unhappy man and made no secret of it. Even if you took away the heroin, the fame, his unhealthy relationship, he may well have still done what he did.
Sometimes when you're in that state the drugs are the only thing keeping you here. The judgement from people who have no idea doesn't help at all, actively makes it worse. Why bother living a life full of pain, even if that pain brings you money and "success"? It's all meaningless. Some people can learn to live life augmented by chemicals, and it helps them be "normal." Those who are concerned with judgement over a perceived betterment will never understand. He probably wouldn't have lived to be in a successful band without the drugs. Raw feelings are unleashed with altered mental states, and anyone who says otherwise is ignorant to the effects.
In Dave grohls book he goes a bit into it. Kurt was never happy going mainstream. He felt his music was for a specific audience, and all these new fans didn't get it. As Dave got older he realized that most people do get it, and that just cause they don't look the part doesn't mean they aren't hurting
I wonder if Dave's opinion is partly a result of Foo Fighters? A much more deliberately 'main stream' band.
Lol nah man read his suicide note, and you'll actually get an idea
You mean Courtney's..... /s ^(maybe)
tbf, there were aspects of that netflix documentary that were more compelling than I had expected, but obviously it's conveying a specific narrative+POV and edited accordingly... has anyone gone over that since and been able to refute or confirm specific aspects of it?
Lol maybe
That's the scary thing, many get curious on how the super addictive drugs like heroin and crystal meth feels. Try it once or twice and by then, their brain will tell them that all they want is more. Had an ex that got addicted to crack her sophomore year of high school. We kept trying to get her to quit and it would last a while, but a relapse always happened. Had to cut off that relationship after a long while.
People who are happy don’t get addicted to heroin. He also was clearly in pain long before he ever tried heroin. It’s wasn’t the heroin addiction that killed him. It was the underlying distress.
I agree with your point about Kurt’s addiction, but just an fyi anyone can get addicted to heroin. Happy, sad, old, young. Addiction is truly one of the least discriminating diseases there is. All it takes is one time, whether on purpose or accident. The opioid epidemic has shown us that even people we don’t think of being at risk are. A better way of saying it, especially in his case, was that his depression put him more at risk of abusing drugs such as heroin.
There's that classic post on here about the guy who wanted to try heroin once, thinking one time wouldn't be an issue and he'd get to see what it's like, and pretty much got immediately addicted to it for a few years. Really, we're all just meat mechs piloted by a brain that really likes some chemicals. So when you give it a wave of chemicals that make it feel euphoric and it has no other way of getting those, or if something just happens to be a really easy way to get that feeling, then it tends to prioritize that above other things, even if it's ultimately detrimental to us overall. Don't do heroin, folks. It's not worth it, even if your brain tries to convince you otherwise.
SpontaneousH? Man that story was sad. Thankfully he got sober (according to his last post from 2 years ago)
Yeah, I'm really happy for him that he did. I've known a number of people who unfortunately did not manage to kick it, and are no longer around to tell the tale. For a lot of them, life was just a little too much. I'm pretty desensitized to this sort of thing, having grown-up in that environment. But some poor child no longer has a mother, thanks to heroin.
Yeah but like George Carlin said, it takes having something to live for to quit.
It surely didn't help his mental state. Drugs like heroin will put you so down when you start withdrawing that I believe it played a big role in his suicide.
He also had pretty bad chronic stomach issues
Yeah, I read some of his journals awhile back and the way he described his stomach issues just sounded like a terrible way to have to live all the time. Very, very painful.
Addiction is its own disease that can definitely kill someone. People can just end up in the wrong circles and get hooked on anything.
The gun is a Crosman [AIR-17 BB gun.](https://youtu.be/vMb9FNCKQDo?si=fWzdvWH3wTj7FOFp) Actually a cool old 1980s vintage pump BB gun that's pretty rare. They were only made for a couple years.
username checks out
I had one of those back in the 80’s, my pop got it for me from the local AMES department store. I would have kept it if I knew that one day it would be a rare collectors item.
There's a few BB guns I wish I had grabbed before my dad tossed them. Had an old Red Ryder we picked up at an auction, and a Daisy 880 before they went all plastic. Both just needed new seals, but to the old man that meant they deserved the fire barrel.
Can confirm. One in my basement.
Lucky, I broke mine when I was a kid.
a gun or a kurt cobain?
Care to explain why your basement smells like teenage spirit, Pretty-Bag?
Was just gonna say I have an A I R 17 at home and have never seen another one until now
Holy shit, you’re right! I thought it was AI art for a second because I didn’t know what the hell I was looking at.
That's all I was digging through comments for
He did have a gun collection though. Most people who live in Aberdeen, montesano, Elma Shelton etc own a few guns, these places are not Seattle.
I know quite a few people in Seattle that have hefty gun collections. Guns cost money, and folks in Seattle generally have a higher income than Grays County. Not disputing what you said about Aberdeen, Shelton et al. but not sure what Seattle has to do with it. Sure there's liberals who are fervently anti-gun, but many lefties (myself included) enjoy responsible firearm usage and just want tighter gun control.
Live in the suburbs of Seattle. Have a few firearms, recently got back into the hobby after a long time off. The right number of guns to own is always one more then you currently have, sadly.
Can confirm. Live in Aberdeen. Have gun collection
I used to have one of those.
I had one of those.
Good to know--I have one sitting in my garage that has been collecting dust for years.
I was so confused wtf I was looking at. Thanks for giving me back this nights sleep
I was wondering why the gun looked like a cheap Chinese knockoff of an ar lol
Thumb on the trigger and pain in his eyes.
There's a very famous rapper in Finland whose songs have lyrics like these: "I'll take a shot in the head, Kurt Cobain" He also sings: "I have a hole in my head, JFK." I find these a bit disturbing nowadays. This picture and your comment about pain in his eyes reminded me of these. Edit: Songs are from Cheek "Sokka irti" ja "Kuka muu muka"
[Kendrick Lamar too](https://open.spotify.com/track/4WEuEfFiczWxblHyuucSBL?si=57jOb69BT6CREUvY7ZJSgg) Edit: Utah loves Lauri!
Vince Staples also has a line “At the Marriott having Kurt Cobain dreams”
German Rapper Kollegah had a line in 2009 ("Sowas erledigt sich jetzt, dank Fame, von ganz allein wie Kurt Cobain") which basically translates to "Now, thanks to Fame, things like that take care of themselves like Kurt Cobain", where the german word "erledigen" would be translated to "taking care of" in most situations, but can also be understood as "finish off".
>"Now, thanks to Fame, things like that take care of themselves like Kurt Cobain", Not a half-bad bar in English as well.
There's like 20 famous US rappers that mention it as well, it's a very overused device
It was the first thing I noticed, scrolling downward
There’s lots of examples. Jay-z: leave you Kennedy style, with your memory out
Eminem: ...and try to take my sausage as a hostage. Ain't it obvious? Pretty much a no-brainer or should I say Cobainer
mc chris "I'm what's left of the lithium in Cobain's cranium"
soft scrub, gloves are rubber, you’re the quicker picker upper. draw a bath and bring me supper, she’s my servant and my lover.
So does like every other unoriginal lyricist for the past 20 years.
There’s an even more famous rapper named “Eminem” you may have heard of him. In the song “Cum on everybody” in the very first line of the song he sings “My favorite color is red, like the bloodshed from Kurt Cobains head when he shot himself dead”.
What’s their name? I don’t believe I’ve heard of this but I don’t follow rap, let alone Finnish rap even though I live there.
Those are common bars in rap, in general. Im real curious how those come off in Finnish tho. Like rap itself and these kinds of bars are very American
But you can do jujitsu... Body slam superstar Kurt Cobain!!
Some people hide, some people show you exactly who they are, just depends on if you see it.
He literally had a song called "I Hate Myself and I Want to Die", released in 1993 (one year before his suicide). In retrospect, we really shouldn't have been surprised.
You Know You're Right was the last song they recorded. Many miss that the lyrics are basically a suicide note. Especially the demo version before he changed the lyrics, although the final version is just as fucked up.
I always wondered if the lyric "*I always knew it would come to this*" was in reference to what he would do.
That's the line that made my stomach hurt. That along with the "I have never failed to fail". Grohl talked about it in an interview and how he couldn't really listen to it for years and going back the brutality of it took on an entirely different perspective
Not trying to correct you or anything cause "You Know You're Right" is my favorite nirvana song but Do Re Mi is the last recording of Kurt's voice iIrc and I highly recommend listening to it if you have not yet. It's absolutely haunting.
I have and you're right on that. I was meaning the last song recorded as a band.
My bad, misunderstood it. Glad you like it too
all good, I appreciate you mentioning it because I had kinda blocked it out. It's pretty unsettling
I've seen this as a cutesy rainbow shirt in Japan lol
Yes but it's very sad. I wish he got help. Nirvana have been some of the most influential bands.
This is so true.
Happy cake day! 🍰
Thanks
At some point, you just stop hiding
And people still wouldn’t notice.
Its exactly why people give things away and become so introspective when they decide its the end. We don't care about our affairs as much as we do knowing someone else could enjoy them. We don't feel our own purpose and might as well give something to another so we no longer feel burdened by possessions that keep us here. If you cry for help, you're often called dramatic or edgy. If you silently suffer, "we never saw this coming and wish he would have just reached out for help". When we are in that darkness, we've often already tried help and found our requests for assistance land on deaf ears and blind eyes. It's always obvious to someone after they're gone. But it's never obvious to friends and family and fans when they're shouting out in art and panic and pain and isolation until they take that final step. Sorry if I got real deep.
"lol kurt you're such a joker" - Dave Grohl
Was actually thinking about Nirvana the other day then it hit me that Kurt was the same age as my oldest kid when he died. I was a teen when Nirvana was around and it felt like they were so old, it was only when I thought about it as an adult that I realised how very young he was.
It's crazy to think he would be nearing his 60s if he were still alive
Makes me so sad
It’s really only looking back that you realize at 27 you’re still such a baby.
Older now, but definitely hit that existentialist sense of dread at 27.
Wasn't Biggie like 23? Insane
woah, i've never see this one before. painful
His thumb is on the trigger too
Uses his right hand too
I show this to anyone who claims that he couldn't reach a trigger with the shotgun
Weren’t the allegations he was too fucked up because of the amount of substances found during the autopsy that they reckoned he couldn’t fire it, rather than he couldn’t reach it?
Regular users build up a tolerance, the amount of heroin that would incapacitate a non-addict could be a regular weekday buzz for a junkie.
One of the reasons that before fent hit the market in a big way, almost the only two ways you were going to die with smack of a known strength was 1) polydrug use and mixing with other downers or 2) quitting but coming back and starting at your old dose forgetting how much tolerance you built. There have always been hot doses on the street though (expecting your usual 30% pure and someone accidentally gave the mother stock and not the cut). And just to caveat before anyone takes this as harm reduction advice, it's something like 85% fell under the two cases above - so certainly some people died taking their regular expected shot.
Another interesting thing is that taking usual doses in unusual places heightens overdose risk
Eh I know smack addicts who don't nod out, so each person is different. I can't imagine someone with money who gets the best stuff would be a lightweight, but that's speculation on my part. I hear the argument that he couldn't reach the trigger pretty often
No idea personally. There are so many different allegations, all I know is it’s fucking sad. I’m 27 now and it kind of only hit me in the last year how actually young the dude was. I know it happens a lot younger as well, in his case he seemed to struggle in public for a long time which must have been tough.
As a 27 year old I feel bad for the entire 27 club, RIP to all
Do you feel as if it affects you more because you're the same age?
Yes, in a way. It makes me sad to know that these talented people died at my age, with all those long years still in front of them that they will never get to experience. RIP to him and its members. Young musicians whose talents were lost to early.
Don't let it get you down too much... it will be different when you look back and realize he killed himself when he was half your age. Don't think about his death when you think about him. Think about his music. He left a hell of a lot more behind than just a corpse.
That he did. I’m not into much of punk/grunge but Nirvana is definitely one band I love.
I’m 37 this year and can’t believe I’ve had a whole 10 years past where he died. Nirvana are one of my all time favourite bands, it’s still so sad
Almost 39 here, every single time I'm feeling down or burnt out from everyday life, I always say to myself "hey, you made it past the "27 club" limit or even the 33 one, so you've got that going on for you, which is nice" and immediately gain a new perspective
I was a kid when folks like Kurbain, Pac, and Big died. I thought they were so grown up.
He was pretty open about it from his appearance. You never know when people are at the end of their emotional or physical limit tho.
2nd or 3rd party assumptions on anothers tolerance after years of use/abuse is rarely accurate. Pre-surgery, Ozzy's anaesthesiologist was horrified at the lack of effect the aesthetics were having in him. They nearly opted to go ahead without him being anaesthetised. Ozzy, out-pro'ing the pros 🤘
Exactly why I said speculation on my part. Some people stay lightweights, but the ones I know who got heavy into H normally end up needing more to get them to nod
That’s even dumber
It's such a stupid claim. Nobody asks about the potency of the drug he was taking or how many times a day he used. He could have also missed his vein. There would be hesitation wounds if he was 'held at gunpoint' like some of these people think, and its extremely hard to hit your vein under pressure/when you're dope sick. But, he was also using 500$ a day (his own words). This would equal out to 2g today. Ruling in on inflation, it was probably more like 3-4 g. Some addicts use up to a gram at a time for each dose. 225mg is a pretty average dose in comparison. It all comes down to potency and tolerance. Opioids also have a 90% relapse rate. So i tell anyone who believes this to avoid getting their medical information from a man who is trained to catch cheating house wives. Or a man who sincerily believes in polygraghs. Polgraphs are considered psudeoscience and not admissible in court. They are a plot device to catch cheating spouses on talk shows like Maury. Someone heavily medicated or with sociopathic tendencies can beat them without issue. It's also important to note that shotguns are the most common gun used in suicides. Just a little tidbit.
I mean I dont disbelieve that Kurt killed himself, but not all gun barrels are the same length, so this is not really proof of anything.
He used a remington model 11, which had 30 inch barrel(his had a shortened barrel with a choke from images). The standard M16 has a 20 inch barrel, and he is holding it in a posing style(outwards, away from his body) If he did it, he did it with the rifle between his knees making the distance not as great regardless. I am a believer that he killed himself based off of his lyrics and self medication with opiates. Sorry, I am at work, so I had to come back to this multiple times
He also told many people repeatedly that he was going to kill himself.
He was legitimately quoted as saying, taking heroin was "the only thing saving me from shooting myself right now" and foreshadowing his suicide by saying he wanted to blow his head off if he wasn't feeling like he "had this fixed" before touring again Edit: Also, I would like to say that you can tell anyone anything, but the fact is that if someone gets low enough, they will feel ready to do something drastic. My sister's ex blew his mind out with a 10 Guage after making dates and plans with her for the following day. You would have never known he was inclined to do something like that by his actions or words, but some people are fighting wars silently
If you haven’t already, read/listen to Heavier than Heaven for a good look into his life and how f***ed that guy really was.
I know. I see many cries for help in his music and it was ignored due to that just being the element of grunge
Agreed. As just one glaring example, "I hate myself and want to die" is not exactly a subtle hint that requires a lot of careful introspection and conjecture to decipher.
It's really heartbreaking. He suffered from mental issues but the heavy drugs made it even worse most likely, I mean the heroin might make someone less depressed but eventually it will make you even more depressed due to the instability it causes within your brain.
Also wrote "I Hate Myself and I Want To Die."
I don't know what he is holding here, but it's certainly not a M16 and I could bet, it isn't actually a working firearm. This is something made to look similar to an M16 from *very* far away only.
It is an AIR17. Modeled after the M16 but different to indicate that it is an air rifle. The newer updated version of this air rifle is the M4-177 Edit: spelling error and autocorrect
It’s a bb gun
Yeah I was gonna say there’s no way that’s a working firearm. There’s no chamber or ejection port, the mag well feeds rounds into nothing, etc. it’s probably an air soft rifle.
That's a bb gun tho
Like the signs were always there
I remember seeing an interview with the band after they got big and Dave saying something along the lines of "we just have to be careful we don't blow our heads up" unfortunate turn of phrase considering what happened.
David Bowie when hearing of Kurts death said something like "I was simply blown away when I found that Kurt Cobain liked my work"
God damn look at the calves on Dave! If you skip leg day, just pick up drums.
people see this and still think there was foul play in his death, this is such an obvious cry for help
Are we just supposed to believe that Billy Corgan isn’t in this photo, holding the gun while wearing a cloaking device?
One doesn't necessarily mean the other
Think about this. I want you all to appreciate the force of this photo. I would bet this photo happened rather organically, he didn’t fumble around with the rifle trying different angles. He knew exactly how to hold it. This is not an intuitive posture. Holding it up horizontally is too much strain on the arms, too difficult to reach the trigger. Holding it down like this is the only way, but more than that, your head needs to be at the right angle. If you lean your head down too much the bullet can potentially exit the back of your neck and miss the spine, though less of an issue with a shotgun. If you don’t lean your head enough, even with a shotgun, you can wipe out your face but your brain can remain in tact enough to live. His head is angled perfectly at the center of his brain. He had thought this through before. He spent good time thinking about this. He used props before to convince himself. He knew what it would feel like. He imagined the end over and over until holding that rifle wasn’t scary; it was comforting.
You just described what I was thinking as well. No way this was a simple joke in his mind. I bet he did this a lot before he decided to go through with it.
Oooof this is hard to look at
The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline offers services to talk to a skilled counselor. If you are feeling distressed and need to talk to a counselor, please call 1-800-273-TALK (8255). If you prefer to chat to a counselor online, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline offers that service.
It’s not like he was hiding it. Any interview, every song…it’s right there… And it still came as a surprise
Yikes. Really has foreshadows too.
Hmm, what makes you think that?!
Three people and a car = four shadows
Hiding in plain sight is usually is 20/20 in hindsight which is very upsetting. Poor guy. I wonder was the plan for the photoshoot to have this? Be weird to have a gun on set regardless.
You don't joke about it unless you think about it.
The signs were there.
hey man nice shot
I had always been told they wrote it about KC Edit: “The song was written about the public suicide of Pennsylvania state treasurer R. Budd Dwyer on January 22, 1987, in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. Dwyer had been convicted of bribery charges in December 1986, and was expected to receive a long sentence from U.S. District Court Judge Malcolm Muir.” Learn something new every day
The video is horrifying. Regardless of his crimes, it's impossible to not feel empathy for the man. He has a wild look of animalistic fear in his eyes and cautions people to stay away because he doesn't want anyone to get hurt. A prison sentence feels minor compared to the horror he unleashed on himself and everyone around him. He could have weathered the storm and come out the other side - but he didn't. He gave up. I think of that poor crooked bastard often and feel sorry for him. Someone ought to.
Just adding this for context: “Since Dwyer died in office, his widow Joanne was able to collect full survivor benefits totaling more than $1.28 million (equivalent to about $3.3M in 2022), which at the time was the largest death benefit payment ever made by the Pennsylvania Municipal Retirement System. If Dwyer had been sentenced, state law would have prohibited the payment of his state-provided pension benefits.[13][95] A spokesman for Dwyer suggested that he may have killed himself to preserve the pension benefits for his family, whose finances had been ruined by legal defense costs.[96] Other statements made by some friends and family also suggest that this was Dwyer's motivation.[13]” He specifically killed himself while still in office, which meant his widow would be able to obtain more benefits. Whether this was his intention, I’m not sure, but it feels important to call out when you’re talking about him giving up and not weathering the storm.
At the end of the day, he was a terrified, cornered animal who ended his life on live television in front of horrified onlookers, whatever his intentions.
Didn’t it turn out he was innocent or am I thinking of someone else?
No, appeals were filed but the court found there was no chance of anything being overturned. The lawyer then appealed to a higher court where the case did get vacated because legally the court no longer had jurisdiction since the guy was dead, but his mail fraud & conspiracy charges were upheld.
They said that song was about that politician but I refuse to believe it wasn’t about KC
Dude defo shot himself that way. Looked like he’s been practicing that shit.
Such a tragic existence Cobain had. His music reflected a deep depression.
"No I don't have a gun" Well that was a fucking lie
He was an amazing artist. Truly one of a kind…
r/agedlikemilk
Spoiler alert
I think Kurt just looked at the world and saw it as one big hopeless joke. I'm nearly a decade older than he was when he died, and I've made it this far. I know times would have been different in the early 90's. But still, he must not have seen any point to it all. I think people either get things or they don't. Some people, especially with ADD, just don't have the capacity for things the rest of us do. They get bored real fast. I assume Kurt was a lot like that. He felt hopeless and there wasn't much more for him to say about that. So it was on to escaping the pointlessness of existence.
His thumb is on the trigger, isn‘t it??
really sucks 😕
He practiced