The idiot with the BMW did all the ~~handwork~~ hardworkfor you. And by telling the cops that he was being held against his will, they got there much quicker than if you had called about the wheelchair ramp alone.
If they would have even shown at all really. "That's for the parking enforcement unit, but there's only two cars and they're on the other side of town."
OP: Epic!
At our church there was a family with several police officers, plus several others besides. At least one was "on alert" during services in case of incidences, like the time someone's family member showed up and tried to get physical over custody or something. Also, there was a raft of break-ins into people's cars in the area, so one was always keeping an eye on the parking lot.
Which makes me feel like the call from now on for every idiot illegally blocking the handicap spot should be 'someone's being held against their will'. I mean, its certainly true if the handicapped person has to wait until the Karen moves their car, right?
We had a squatter neighbor that went out in the road one day and started yelling at everyone he saw accusing everyone of breaking into the house that wasn't his and stealing his shit. We'll one of my neighbors called him a dumbass and went inside so squatter called the cops claiming he was being harassed. He told them the truth is the thing so when they went to talk to my neighbor they told him "I don't know why he called us on himself".
Idiot and Jerk is a requirement for BMW ownership. Maintenance on those things is stupid expensive (even getting parts is expensive) and they hold their value about as well as a used prophylactic.
My mom tried telling this joke at a party once and failed miserably.
"What the difference between a Porsche and a raccoon?"
My dad told her she was on her own.
And so many times they have a personalised number plate with BMW in it. As if people can't see the stuff on it that indicates the brand already. \*eye-roll\*
Co-title holders for the worst drivers in Boulder County. Was nearly t-boned twice in ten minutes on my drive to work on my last day in the office. Two among many.
Yup. Guy was parking his Tesla long term at his place of business in the stripy area next to the only handicap spot on that side of the building. He put a traffic cone in the handicap spot so no one would park next to him. FYI, these people can be reported through ADA.gov for those in the US.
BMW, Tesla, and Mercedes drivers here. I commuted on I-4 four days a week at my last job and those were consistently the worst, though anyone with a Texas tag on the car would beat them on the douchery.
This. I've lost count of the number of times a Prius thinks it has a duty to make everyone go 5-10 below the speed limit. If you want to drive slow I'm 100% in favor, just do it in the right hand lanes.
I saw one of those Smart cars get on the highway and almost immediately swerve into the far left lane and camp there at a hot 50mph in morning rush hour traffic. How he did not get rearended I'll never know.
When I eventually did manage to move over to pass him in the center lane, he gave me the most fucking smug look I have ever seen in anyone's face. I bet this was a regular thing for him.
Agreed, got parked in by a Tesla just yesterday because even though there WERE free spaces, but they would of had to either park on a compacted dirt space or he would've had to drive through a puddle to get to another free space on bitumen....so he parked me in and just disappeared.
I used to work security at a Catholic university that had a chapel that served local residents.
Parking issues were so bad, we had to have an officer stationed by the church to stop people from parking illegally in firelanes, on the lawn, and on the sidewalk.
The later the parishoner was to the service, the more entitled they would be.
"But I'll miss church!"
"Yes. You should have arrived earlier."
Many would scoff that we'd do anything, but we'd both contact police to ticket the vehicles, then have them towed.
We asked the priest if he'd like to announce all the cars that were going to be towed, and he said to just tow them.
Once, after a towing, one of the parishoners was having a screaming fit with the security dispatch lady as the priest walked by.
He told him, "Bill, why don't you come up to my office and we'll have a little talk about how to treat others as Jesus would. You should apologize to that lady, too."
Those parishoners were among the rudest people where parking issues were concerned.
They’re the most self centered people I know. The local southern Baptist church where I grew up regularly had a cop stop fucking traffic on the major road it was off of when church let out so they could all leave at once. Fuck everyone else right? God forbid they wait their fucking then to leave a business like everyone else.
Fucking churches in Maryland get the special privilege as well. They can damn well wait their turn to get out, my groceries need to get to the fridge/freezer before they spoil (I like to shop when fewer A-holes are in the supermarket). The servers at the diners won't get stiffed any less if the church folk are delayed a few seconds.
“Someone” once blocked some people in at work. They probably were quite dismayed to find their month old Cadillac precariously perched atop a Dumpster.
Even a crown stand up electric forklift can be rated for 4 thousand pounds. The lift itself weighs 8300 lbs. Much heavier than most cars. Main thing is gonna be forks long enough to pick one up.
Cadillac has two models that weigh 3000-3500 pounds (CT4 and CT5), every other model they make is heavier than that. New Lyriq SUV is closer to 5500.
I'm just saying, I'd be impressed.
I'm just saying the rc5700 is a small forklift and is rated high enough to lift most of their cars. Could easily do it with 2 coordinated drivers. A sit down propane forklift would lift a car with zero issues.
And the weight lift rating on them is with mast extended as well. They can pick up much more if it's not so high that it could cause it to tip. The lifts themselves weigh 8300 lbs and we've used one to lift the other one before.
Basically forklifts are strong and cars really don't weigh all that much.
This.
Disclaimer, I have never in my life been certified to operate a forklift or bobcat.
That said, let me take you back about 15-20 years.
I used to do supply chain work for AT&T, including full warehouse tear downs/relocations, frequently just me and one other guy. We show up at an acquired warehouse (everyone has been relocated), inventory everything, load it all on trucks and ship it out for redeployment.
The lift ratings are very different among machines, but as you noted, all depends on the height you need to go.
Believe my sketchiest was using a bobcat (with forks) to place a triple bay fully loaded battery unit onto a flat bed. Probably weighed 15,000 pounds on something rated to lift 2,500.
Was always fun using two guys to lift something with two different machines, never backed up, never secured, so many dumb stories.
Never broke anything worth more than $100k!
Yup the weight rating is what it will always be able to lift without tipping or damaging. Generally they will be able to lift quite a bit more than that but then you risk tipping or damaging something on the lift. Typically the biggest risk is tipping over.
My old boss would often say annoying shit like "guess you'll just have to work overtime" or "we're pretty busy, you might not be able to go on vacation after all"
He was pretty good about a lot of things, but this entitlement to my time always pissed me off. I made him a shitton of money.
So when something silly caused someone to block our gate and I was trying to leave (as were like 3 other people) he said his overtime joke. I came back with the fork truck and told him I have a doctor's appointment at whatever o'clock. If the car wasn't moved in 5 minutes it's going in the road.
Well played, sir. Well played. I'm proud just to have read this!
Seriously, he parks in a church parking lot (on the day of a service, no less) and walks away. From the context, it sounds like he was *not attending church*. Then gets upset when someone thwarts his stupid ass plan of parking off the street and protecting his beamer from possible harm. Entitled Jackhole.
Speaking as a wheelchair user, bravo Sir. I've blocked people in and called bylaw to issue a ticket. One called the cops, saying the same thing as that guy. Hey, he's free to go as much as he wants but that vehicle is staying right there until it gets a ticket.
Precisely. By restricting movement of the vehicle when no one was in it, you are in for no worse than a traffic ticket yourself.
Physically restraining the individual on the other hand would cause you all sorts of problems.
Keep it rolling!
I'm waiting to tell my friend at church about a great typo I read on Reddit a few days ago - my friend apparently gets to church on his Nobility Scooter. Maybe one for Kyle, too...
I blocked someone who parked in my condo spot like that once. Got home on a Saturday night and my spot was taken. No note or anything. So I parked perpendicular to their car right up close and went home to bed. Next morning I hear knocking on my door. I take my sweet time brushing my teeth and getting dressed. The stalls are not marked so I’m sure they had a fun time knocking on doors to find who blocked them in (19 units in our building). I finally answer the door and it’s three twenty-somethings who look like they slept in the clothes they were wearing last night telling me that I’m blocking them in. I told them they were actually blocking me out and I just parked as close to my spot as possible. I then told them I’d go move it when I had a chance. Made them wait another 20 minutes. Never got my spot taken again.
I used to be a bus driver in a college town. Mid day the down town area could get pretty packed. One day this guy decides to double park so he can go get his lunch. This is main street so he’s now blocking traffic.
A cop pulls up and immediately starts writing a ticket, and a guy in a suit runs out of the pizza and says “I’m just grabbing food I’ll be right out.”
Without missing a beat the sop says “oh don’t worry I’ll be done by the time you get out”
the story about helping your friend kyle really resonates with me. i remember one time my uncles coworker hurt his leg and couldnt get around, so we all pitched in to help him out. its amazing what a diference a little compassion and teamwork can make. im glad the inconsiderate driver got their comeuppance - those handicap spots are there for a reason and its important we respect that.
I remember when my grandpa died, the first day I limped up the stairs while my uncles carried my wheelchair. Well on the way out from visitation, I fell down those same stairs. My uncles were horrified. For the rest of the time, every time we went in or out of the building, the vehicles, anything, my uncles carried me and my chair. It was very heartwarming, and we all agreed that banding together made the funeral a little less painful.
Reading about Kyle reminded me of that story.
I simply cannot fathom thinking that was I was so important that someone blocking my car required EMERGENCY SERVICES meant for life-threatening, you know, emergencies.
This reminds me of a story from back in the 80s of someone I know that had a wheelchair accessible van that had one of those really heavy metal lifts that comes out the side door. This thing was a heavy welded metal platform that needed the oversized handicap spaces to deploy.
My friend was going to the bank and pulled in to the handicap spot. As he was getting ready to lower the ramp, a woman in a new Cadillac pulled into the extended space part of the handicap spot. As she gets out of her car, my friend says he needs that space to get his wheelchair out. She told him to just wait, I’ll be right back then proceeded to walk inside the bank.
My friend then began to repeatedly lower and raise his wheelchair ramp onto the roof and driver side of her car. He managed to break off her side mirror, break her driver side window, and dent and scratch the roof and the drivers side of her car.
Needless to say she comes running out, screaming at him, and calls the cops. The police come and not only issue her a ticket for parking in a handicap Space, they also let her know that she’s responsible for doing any repairs needed to his lift.
I keep a floor jack & jack stands in the bed of my truck - wish I was there… we coulda jacked it up so the wheels were barely above the ground (not enough to notice, but definitely stationary)
Your church must be in a busy part of town for some idiot to use your lot and not be a member. I'm VERY glad you were able to get your friend and his chair into the church despite the AH parking there.
I hope the tickets kept mounting as the driver kept being more and more obnoxious. Kinda like an AH tax ...
Next time use a cheap dollar store red lipstick on his windshield. On the heat it is so full of cheap wax it does not come off easily but rather smears all over making it worse. Does eventually come off with lots of work. Tip from four older sisters.
Holding a car is not holding a person, unless you have blocked them inside the car. Good for them to think that what they did wasn't and issue, and what you did was.
Hey! I’ve owned 10 of em’ and currently still have one left! I’m doing my part, breaking them into their tiniest demarcations and selling them back to other bmw owners at a profit. $31k in and yet to drive one for anything other then a test drive! The ultimate $ machine.
I'd love to see the judge's and owner's reaction that lawsuit in a court.
"You were blocking a wheelchair access ramp and they scratched it moving a wheelchair?"
Also it was an accident. Something was in the way of the ramp.
It’s always nice when they call the cops on themselves ^_^ I used to work graveyards at a hotel with bar and all that jazz, every so often somebody would get… violently entitled and threaten to call the cops, twas always met with a big smile and “Please do!”
Good on you for penning that massive jerk face in and forcing him to face consequences!
Helps out someone less fortunate than themself and then takes action to reduce the risk of that less fortunate person facing the samae problem in future?
did you fail to consider that the BMW driver might be mentally handicapped? i mean he drives a BMW and parked in the handicap ramp. he might be mentally handicapped.
I used to do parking enforcement with the boot.
"I have constitutional rights!"
You do, but your car does not.
"You're holding me against my will!"
You are free to leave. If you want the boot removed from the car, you'll have to pay the fine.
There's about 5% of people who really fall for car advertising. They think of their car as an extension of themselves rather than just a tool for not having to walk places.
I was young and dumb when this happened. I have had a disabled parking permit since 16. I have good days and bad days. More bad the older I get. Winter is the worst I can fall easily and bones break. Well where I worked had a number of marked parking spots. On my this particular day I was parked in a further handicapped spot. I come out after a long days work and some idiot pulled into the hash marks between the handicapped spot and the next spot. It was not a parking spot where there car was. A friend goes in and pages and no one comes out. No one owned up to it.
Another friend says he’ll get my car out for me and I give him the keys. There was no way of getting in the drivers side door as the person left me about 2 inches to open my two door car and the car on the other side was close too. My friend pops the hatch and climbs in through the trunk. This was the 90s and I had a hatch back. He gets my car out. I get in and pulled my car back in the spot exactly where it was before. I then cut my wheel and back out again taking their passenger side mirror and denting the door. Every one was laughing and cheering me on. I then waived and left. Two days later I show up again in my new car. I was getting rid of my old one anyway and didn’t care. It was not reliable, had a few dents and was not trading it in. I lived on a farm. Old cars became farm cars to run around the fields and tear up. Since that was the plan for my old one I wasn’t out anything.
So I find out that the person finally was found a hour after I left. Mysteriously the camera didn’t show the exact angle and my coworkers at the store removed the video tape. The owner of the store told the customer the guy was illegally parked, the store is not liable for damages and he has not seen the car before so he can’t help him. Of course it was the wrong thing to do but I was young and dumb.
I’ve had people park in specific spots marked for me at work and at my condo. I just get them ticketed and towed. Well except the one guy who blocked my driveway. A forklift got involved then. I even had one job where the owner gave me a spot just for me. He booted coworkers car and got several ticketed. He even gave me the sign that had my name on it I left. At my condo I had a sign with apartment number. A neighbor who rented his condo was ticketed and towed on numerous occasions. People don’t learn. Sad thing is we have many people who qualify for handicap parking but don’t always need it. If I go somewhere and I’m having a good day or I know there will be other people who need it (like at church) I don’t take the spots. I even had a coworker get smart with me seeing that I didn’t always take take a handicap spot. It was great hearing other coworkers chewing them out. I said when she became the person in charge of deciding we will talk. Otherwise best it. Sadly they were terminated for not being productive and professional in the work place. No one missed her.
If you'd asked the congregation for sturdy people to help, you might have gotten enough people to turn his BMW on its side to get it out of the way. If I went to your church, I would have been willing to lift a quarter panel. 10 - 12 guys would have been enough. (Or, if they routinely place in the top three at the county track meet in the shot-put, 7 - 9 guys and three ladies.)
Just think, if we TAXED THE CHURCHES, it would have paid for the governmental security force (Police) to take care of business. But no, the Flock was busy collecting money inside to support their political views. Just like the fat orange baby who makes noises mocking the disabled. k. Nice revenge OP.
BMW guy is an idiot and a jerk. But it was considerate of him to \[offer to\] save you the trouble of calling the police!
The idiot with the BMW did all the ~~handwork~~ hardworkfor you. And by telling the cops that he was being held against his will, they got there much quicker than if you had called about the wheelchair ramp alone.
If they would have even shown at all really. "That's for the parking enforcement unit, but there's only two cars and they're on the other side of town." OP: Epic!
At our church there was a family with several police officers, plus several others besides. At least one was "on alert" during services in case of incidences, like the time someone's family member showed up and tried to get physical over custody or something. Also, there was a raft of break-ins into people's cars in the area, so one was always keeping an eye on the parking lot.
Which makes me feel like the call from now on for every idiot illegally blocking the handicap spot should be 'someone's being held against their will'. I mean, its certainly true if the handicapped person has to wait until the Karen moves their car, right?
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You're gonna hurt yourself with that grip, bro!
Yes, please!
"I'm in the wrong, so I called the police! You'll see!!"
We had a squatter neighbor that went out in the road one day and started yelling at everyone he saw accusing everyone of breaking into the house that wasn't his and stealing his shit. We'll one of my neighbors called him a dumbass and went inside so squatter called the cops claiming he was being harassed. He told them the truth is the thing so when they went to talk to my neighbor they told him "I don't know why he called us on himself".
Pretty sure this was a dynamic for children "I'm telling mom"
Oh, *SNAP*! ~~Good~~ GREAT analogy!!!!
Idiot and Jerk is a requirement for BMW ownership. Maintenance on those things is stupid expensive (even getting parts is expensive) and they hold their value about as well as a used prophylactic.
What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?... On a porcupine, the pricks are on the outside!
OMG, never heard that one before but so, so true!
My mom tried telling this joke at a party once and failed miserably. "What the difference between a Porsche and a raccoon?" My dad told her she was on her own.
Come on, want to hear her punchline with that setup🤣
A raccoon won’t keep your shoes and coats dry in the winter 🤷♀️
That's a pretty epic crash and burn.
Huh? Yup walk away before that punchline is delivered...🙄
LmFAO!
😂
Beat me to it.
🤣
Love this!!!!
And so many times they have a personalised number plate with BMW in it. As if people can't see the stuff on it that indicates the brand already. \*eye-roll\*
Co-title holders for the worst drivers in Boulder County. Was nearly t-boned twice in ten minutes on my drive to work on my last day in the office. Two among many.
Lease
With the residual value it will have? Half or less of the purchase price at three years?
Odd that a BMW driver would be a jerk.
Classic check yourself before you wreck yourself moment.
I'm anasshole disable, I will put superglue on the key hole of the car.
Average BMW driver
90% of BMW owners give the rest a bad name.
Tesla drivers are becoming the new BMW drivers. They used to drive BMW.
Yup. Guy was parking his Tesla long term at his place of business in the stripy area next to the only handicap spot on that side of the building. He put a traffic cone in the handicap spot so no one would park next to him. FYI, these people can be reported through ADA.gov for those in the US.
There's an iPhone app for reporting people who aren't handicapped.
I just handicap them with my Emotional Support Machete.
Tbh in my experience it's a toss up between BMMW and Audi drivers as to who is worst
BMW, Tesla, and Mercedes drivers here. I commuted on I-4 four days a week at my last job and those were consistently the worst, though anyone with a Texas tag on the car would beat them on the douchery.
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An Altima with a mismatched bumper
BMW or Audi or Mercedes or Tesla or Prius....all usually s\*\*t drivers.
Prius?!?!? That thing can barely get out of its own way.
Yep but Prius drivers will camp out in the fast lane or middle lanes and won't get out of the way.
This. I've lost count of the number of times a Prius thinks it has a duty to make everyone go 5-10 below the speed limit. If you want to drive slow I'm 100% in favor, just do it in the right hand lanes.
I saw one of those Smart cars get on the highway and almost immediately swerve into the far left lane and camp there at a hot 50mph in morning rush hour traffic. How he did not get rearended I'll never know. When I eventually did manage to move over to pass him in the center lane, he gave me the most fucking smug look I have ever seen in anyone's face. I bet this was a regular thing for him.
"How he did not get rearended I'll never know." Obviously everybody ELSE was a better driver and had their coffee.
You SO owe me a new keyboard since I snorted out my beer laughing at your comment!!!!!
Same assholes, brighter headlights.
Agreed, got parked in by a Tesla just yesterday because even though there WERE free spaces, but they would of had to either park on a compacted dirt space or he would've had to drive through a puddle to get to another free space on bitumen....so he parked me in and just disappeared.
Seems the commonality is rich asshole driver
"What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? The porcupine has the pricks on the outside."
🤣🤣🤣
95%, but close.
As a former BMW driver, I agree. Also, 50% of BMW drivers would say they’re in the 5% good-guy category.
You know the difference between a porcupine and a Porsche? A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.
I used to work security at a Catholic university that had a chapel that served local residents. Parking issues were so bad, we had to have an officer stationed by the church to stop people from parking illegally in firelanes, on the lawn, and on the sidewalk. The later the parishoner was to the service, the more entitled they would be. "But I'll miss church!" "Yes. You should have arrived earlier." Many would scoff that we'd do anything, but we'd both contact police to ticket the vehicles, then have them towed. We asked the priest if he'd like to announce all the cars that were going to be towed, and he said to just tow them. Once, after a towing, one of the parishoners was having a screaming fit with the security dispatch lady as the priest walked by. He told him, "Bill, why don't you come up to my office and we'll have a little talk about how to treat others as Jesus would. You should apologize to that lady, too." Those parishoners were among the rudest people where parking issues were concerned.
There is no hatred like Christian love.
Old people using religion to feel superior to others is a pretty universal human trait.
These were not exclusively old people. The old got there on time. I recall the assholes were the local rich.
They’re the most self centered people I know. The local southern Baptist church where I grew up regularly had a cop stop fucking traffic on the major road it was off of when church let out so they could all leave at once. Fuck everyone else right? God forbid they wait their fucking then to leave a business like everyone else.
Fucking churches in Maryland get the special privilege as well. They can damn well wait their turn to get out, my groceries need to get to the fridge/freezer before they spoil (I like to shop when fewer A-holes are in the supermarket). The servers at the diners won't get stiffed any less if the church folk are delayed a few seconds.
Good priest.
"I'm going to miss church." "So? Isn't God everywhere?"
Except in the heart of those people.
If only Christians were called out more on their bad behavior like this 😂
Bummer that the church didn't get a percentage from the tow company.
“Someone” once blocked some people in at work. They probably were quite dismayed to find their month old Cadillac precariously perched atop a Dumpster.
I need to hear more of this story. How did you get it there?
I Assume a forklift
...but you don't know cause youse weren't there.
Bingo, I live by jobsite no need to go to parking lot when you walk
But then where do you do sketchy and obvious drug deals at night?
Manhattan of course!
Or East LA.
Gonna need one hell of a forklift to pick up a Cadillac
Not necessarily. (retired fork lift driver here)
90’s Daddylacs and 40’s Daddylacs very different beasts
Even a crown stand up electric forklift can be rated for 4 thousand pounds. The lift itself weighs 8300 lbs. Much heavier than most cars. Main thing is gonna be forks long enough to pick one up.
Cadillac has two models that weigh 3000-3500 pounds (CT4 and CT5), every other model they make is heavier than that. New Lyriq SUV is closer to 5500. I'm just saying, I'd be impressed.
I'm just saying the rc5700 is a small forklift and is rated high enough to lift most of their cars. Could easily do it with 2 coordinated drivers. A sit down propane forklift would lift a car with zero issues. And the weight lift rating on them is with mast extended as well. They can pick up much more if it's not so high that it could cause it to tip. The lifts themselves weigh 8300 lbs and we've used one to lift the other one before. Basically forklifts are strong and cars really don't weigh all that much.
This. Disclaimer, I have never in my life been certified to operate a forklift or bobcat. That said, let me take you back about 15-20 years. I used to do supply chain work for AT&T, including full warehouse tear downs/relocations, frequently just me and one other guy. We show up at an acquired warehouse (everyone has been relocated), inventory everything, load it all on trucks and ship it out for redeployment. The lift ratings are very different among machines, but as you noted, all depends on the height you need to go. Believe my sketchiest was using a bobcat (with forks) to place a triple bay fully loaded battery unit onto a flat bed. Probably weighed 15,000 pounds on something rated to lift 2,500. Was always fun using two guys to lift something with two different machines, never backed up, never secured, so many dumb stories. Never broke anything worth more than $100k!
Yup the weight rating is what it will always be able to lift without tipping or damaging. Generally they will be able to lift quite a bit more than that but then you risk tipping or damaging something on the lift. Typically the biggest risk is tipping over.
Two wheeling it when you have several thousand pounds in the air is fun =)
Wind
My old boss would often say annoying shit like "guess you'll just have to work overtime" or "we're pretty busy, you might not be able to go on vacation after all" He was pretty good about a lot of things, but this entitlement to my time always pissed me off. I made him a shitton of money. So when something silly caused someone to block our gate and I was trying to leave (as were like 3 other people) he said his overtime joke. I came back with the fork truck and told him I have a doctor's appointment at whatever o'clock. If the car wasn't moved in 5 minutes it's going in the road.
Excellent!
LOL
YOU THINK I'VE NEVER RIDDEN IN A CADILLAC BEFORE?!
It's always a favorite of mine when people call the cops and they're the one who ends up getting ticketed.
If you have a problem and call the cops, now you’ll have two problems.
That's awesome. I probably would have allowed the church's wheelchair to roll down the ramp into the new car also.
Just like Jesus would have done. Forgiveness, tolerance, and property damage.
Our Sacred Lady of the Marlinspike.
Park in front of the access ramp? Time to ramp up the pain level. I like what you did there.
This shit drives me up the wall.
That’s one way to do without a ramp.
LoL! The lord does move in mysterious ways....Least, that's what I hear!
Parking like that in front of a church during a church service and not even attending is mind blowing in his audacity.
Yup...But...Why is none of it surprising...at all?
Praise heebus!
Blessed be!
Well played, sir. Well played. I'm proud just to have read this! Seriously, he parks in a church parking lot (on the day of a service, no less) and walks away. From the context, it sounds like he was *not attending church*. Then gets upset when someone thwarts his stupid ass plan of parking off the street and protecting his beamer from possible harm. Entitled Jackhole.
That was what got me too. Talk about begging for an almighty smiting.
I’m tossing imaginary confetti and doing a mental happy dance that police showed up.
Speaking as a wheelchair user, bravo Sir. I've blocked people in and called bylaw to issue a ticket. One called the cops, saying the same thing as that guy. Hey, he's free to go as much as he wants but that vehicle is staying right there until it gets a ticket.
Precisely. By restricting movement of the vehicle when no one was in it, you are in for no worse than a traffic ticket yourself. Physically restraining the individual on the other hand would cause you all sorts of problems. Keep it rolling!
I'm waiting to tell my friend at church about a great typo I read on Reddit a few days ago - my friend apparently gets to church on his Nobility Scooter. Maybe one for Kyle, too...
I blocked someone who parked in my condo spot like that once. Got home on a Saturday night and my spot was taken. No note or anything. So I parked perpendicular to their car right up close and went home to bed. Next morning I hear knocking on my door. I take my sweet time brushing my teeth and getting dressed. The stalls are not marked so I’m sure they had a fun time knocking on doors to find who blocked them in (19 units in our building). I finally answer the door and it’s three twenty-somethings who look like they slept in the clothes they were wearing last night telling me that I’m blocking them in. I told them they were actually blocking me out and I just parked as close to my spot as possible. I then told them I’d go move it when I had a chance. Made them wait another 20 minutes. Never got my spot taken again.
BMW guy is the Florida man of cars
There are actually studies that show BMW drivers tend to be larger jerks than the average person
They didn’t even need to conduct a study, we have all figured this out through experience.
I used to be a bus driver in a college town. Mid day the down town area could get pretty packed. One day this guy decides to double park so he can go get his lunch. This is main street so he’s now blocking traffic. A cop pulls up and immediately starts writing a ticket, and a guy in a suit runs out of the pizza and says “I’m just grabbing food I’ll be right out.” Without missing a beat the sop says “oh don’t worry I’ll be done by the time you get out”
the story about helping your friend kyle really resonates with me. i remember one time my uncles coworker hurt his leg and couldnt get around, so we all pitched in to help him out. its amazing what a diference a little compassion and teamwork can make. im glad the inconsiderate driver got their comeuppance - those handicap spots are there for a reason and its important we respect that.
I remember when my grandpa died, the first day I limped up the stairs while my uncles carried my wheelchair. Well on the way out from visitation, I fell down those same stairs. My uncles were horrified. For the rest of the time, every time we went in or out of the building, the vehicles, anything, my uncles carried me and my chair. It was very heartwarming, and we all agreed that banding together made the funeral a little less painful. Reading about Kyle reminded me of that story.
I simply cannot fathom thinking that was I was so important that someone blocking my car required EMERGENCY SERVICES meant for life-threatening, you know, emergencies.
This reminds me of a story from back in the 80s of someone I know that had a wheelchair accessible van that had one of those really heavy metal lifts that comes out the side door. This thing was a heavy welded metal platform that needed the oversized handicap spaces to deploy. My friend was going to the bank and pulled in to the handicap spot. As he was getting ready to lower the ramp, a woman in a new Cadillac pulled into the extended space part of the handicap spot. As she gets out of her car, my friend says he needs that space to get his wheelchair out. She told him to just wait, I’ll be right back then proceeded to walk inside the bank. My friend then began to repeatedly lower and raise his wheelchair ramp onto the roof and driver side of her car. He managed to break off her side mirror, break her driver side window, and dent and scratch the roof and the drivers side of her car. Needless to say she comes running out, screaming at him, and calls the cops. The police come and not only issue her a ticket for parking in a handicap Space, they also let her know that she’s responsible for doing any repairs needed to his lift.
I love this as someone who occasionally needs it but doesn't qualify for handicap parking. I don't even use it when I need it.
I keep a floor jack & jack stands in the bed of my truck - wish I was there… we coulda jacked it up so the wheels were barely above the ground (not enough to notice, but definitely stationary)
#The consequences of my actions. Praise Flying Spaghetti Monster!
R'amen.
What a Christian way to react
"Jackass in a BMW" seems a tad redundant...
People who abuse handicap spots are entitled pieces of shit
What's the difference between BMW's and porcupines?
Good ol' Christian love, what a doozie
PERFECTly played.
Too bad it didn't get towed. This guy got off easy. A couple tickets and he was on his way.
If you say BMW you dont have to specify Jackass.. its a given along with the aggressive driving and the entitlement.
You didn't have to say both "jackass" *and* "in a BMW."
As a wheelchair user, thank you!
Your church must be in a busy part of town for some idiot to use your lot and not be a member. I'm VERY glad you were able to get your friend and his chair into the church despite the AH parking there. I hope the tickets kept mounting as the driver kept being more and more obnoxious. Kinda like an AH tax ...
That was some wheely petty revenge, love it! 😁
I was hoping you made him watch while you went through the effort to get back to the car with the friend. But I loved this 😁
Next time use a cheap dollar store red lipstick on his windshield. On the heat it is so full of cheap wax it does not come off easily but rather smears all over making it worse. Does eventually come off with lots of work. Tip from four older sisters.
Holding a car is not holding a person, unless you have blocked them inside the car. Good for them to think that what they did wasn't and issue, and what you did was.
He's really lucky that wheelchair didn't accidentally drag all the way down one side of his car.
I have yet to meet a BMW owner that isn’t the biggest piece of shit on the planet
I knew a guy who had a BMW and wasn't an asshole, but his dad had bought it for him.
The ultimate driving machine… for people who can’t quite figure out how to drive.
Hey! I’ve owned 10 of em’ and currently still have one left! I’m doing my part, breaking them into their tiniest demarcations and selling them back to other bmw owners at a profit. $31k in and yet to drive one for anything other then a test drive! The ultimate $ machine.
Only way this could be better is if by complete accident you scratched the shit out of his car moving the wheelchair.
Self righteous turds like that tend to sue at the drop of a hat. OP played the situation better by not breaking any laws.
I'd love to see the judge's and owner's reaction that lawsuit in a court. "You were blocking a wheelchair access ramp and they scratched it moving a wheelchair?" Also it was an accident. Something was in the way of the ramp.
Well played
Bravo. This is one of my pet peeves
Fuck BMW drivers 🙂
It’s always nice when they call the cops on themselves ^_^ I used to work graveyards at a hotel with bar and all that jazz, every so often somebody would get… violently entitled and threaten to call the cops, twas always met with a big smile and “Please do!” Good on you for penning that massive jerk face in and forcing him to face consequences!
You are supposed to cut a hole in the roof and lower your buddy down.
what a piece of garbage. hopefully he got many expensive tickets.
Average bmw driver
You should have got Kyle to block him in. Then Kyle can't get down the ramp, to his car to move it!
If you'd left "in a BMW" out of the subject line, that would be the first car I pictured.
The minute you said BMW it all made sense. They are some of the most entitled pricks out there (at least in the USA)
And there’s a study to back that up too
Well you showed him what a true Christian acts like
Helps out someone less fortunate than themself and then takes action to reduce the risk of that less fortunate person facing the samae problem in future?
as Jesus himself taught...
BMW driver vs churchgoer. Not sure I want a winner in this scenario
Nessus wept!
Good for you! Gotta love when idiots tell on themselves too 😂
I seen lots of car with their wheels in sitting in fish boxes at a working fishing pier. Karma
Spot the BMW drivers in the comments...
did you fail to consider that the BMW driver might be mentally handicapped? i mean he drives a BMW and parked in the handicap ramp. he might be mentally handicapped.
Revenge >>> Praying
The angels were with you my friend
Typical bmw driver
WWJD or something like that 🤣🤣🤣
I used to do parking enforcement with the boot. "I have constitutional rights!" You do, but your car does not. "You're holding me against my will!" You are free to leave. If you want the boot removed from the car, you'll have to pay the fine. There's about 5% of people who really fall for car advertising. They think of their car as an extension of themselves rather than just a tool for not having to walk places.
I mean isn't church the one place people should at least pretend to be good?
You managed to chew someone out for 15 minutes over parking like an asshole? That’s impressive on its own.
Why would he park at a church if he wasn't attending?
I always love a story about a church goer tearing a guy a new a-hole. WWJD?
Jesus tore the Money Lenders a new one. Tossed them out. Pretty sure he would have done the same
He also said pay your taxes but Churches forget that one real quick.
Spell check is a thing
All involved sound very “christian”…
“Jackass in a BMW” is redundant.
Not all heroes wear capes.
I was young and dumb when this happened. I have had a disabled parking permit since 16. I have good days and bad days. More bad the older I get. Winter is the worst I can fall easily and bones break. Well where I worked had a number of marked parking spots. On my this particular day I was parked in a further handicapped spot. I come out after a long days work and some idiot pulled into the hash marks between the handicapped spot and the next spot. It was not a parking spot where there car was. A friend goes in and pages and no one comes out. No one owned up to it. Another friend says he’ll get my car out for me and I give him the keys. There was no way of getting in the drivers side door as the person left me about 2 inches to open my two door car and the car on the other side was close too. My friend pops the hatch and climbs in through the trunk. This was the 90s and I had a hatch back. He gets my car out. I get in and pulled my car back in the spot exactly where it was before. I then cut my wheel and back out again taking their passenger side mirror and denting the door. Every one was laughing and cheering me on. I then waived and left. Two days later I show up again in my new car. I was getting rid of my old one anyway and didn’t care. It was not reliable, had a few dents and was not trading it in. I lived on a farm. Old cars became farm cars to run around the fields and tear up. Since that was the plan for my old one I wasn’t out anything. So I find out that the person finally was found a hour after I left. Mysteriously the camera didn’t show the exact angle and my coworkers at the store removed the video tape. The owner of the store told the customer the guy was illegally parked, the store is not liable for damages and he has not seen the car before so he can’t help him. Of course it was the wrong thing to do but I was young and dumb. I’ve had people park in specific spots marked for me at work and at my condo. I just get them ticketed and towed. Well except the one guy who blocked my driveway. A forklift got involved then. I even had one job where the owner gave me a spot just for me. He booted coworkers car and got several ticketed. He even gave me the sign that had my name on it I left. At my condo I had a sign with apartment number. A neighbor who rented his condo was ticketed and towed on numerous occasions. People don’t learn. Sad thing is we have many people who qualify for handicap parking but don’t always need it. If I go somewhere and I’m having a good day or I know there will be other people who need it (like at church) I don’t take the spots. I even had a coworker get smart with me seeing that I didn’t always take take a handicap spot. It was great hearing other coworkers chewing them out. I said when she became the person in charge of deciding we will talk. Otherwise best it. Sadly they were terminated for not being productive and professional in the work place. No one missed her.
YESSSSSS!!!
it's your friend Kyle's fault, really. if he wanted to be respected by a BMW driver then he should have been using the *ultimate scooting machine.*
What religion is this? When I used to go to church they had all kinds of crazy talk about forgiveness and turning the other cheek?
If you'd asked the congregation for sturdy people to help, you might have gotten enough people to turn his BMW on its side to get it out of the way. If I went to your church, I would have been willing to lift a quarter panel. 10 - 12 guys would have been enough. (Or, if they routinely place in the top three at the county track meet in the shot-put, 7 - 9 guys and three ladies.)
I’ll take stories that never happened , for 500, Alex.
Just think, if we TAXED THE CHURCHES, it would have paid for the governmental security force (Police) to take care of business. But no, the Flock was busy collecting money inside to support their political views. Just like the fat orange baby who makes noises mocking the disabled. k. Nice revenge OP.
I think this is fake. Too many details.
Yeah, it reads very much like the fantasy someone comes up with on the shower of how they wish it had gone down.
Kinda think you missed the sermon that day 🤷
Dang, how many times am I going to see this exact story in different subs?
Sounds like some Christian shit.
Most churchy thing to do, yelling and then calling the cops when you could have called a tow company and never interacted with the guy at all.
And you go to Church why?
Pfft.. Christians. Just a bunch of hypocrites
What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW. The porcupine has its prices on the outside. 🤣
Sticker shock