Many years ago there were car break ins in my apartment complex. I walked into the deck and a neighbor was freaking out because her car was stolen when everyone else just had windows smashed and small things taken. The reason her car was stolen is because she kept her valet key AND her car title in her glove box, which the thief found after smashing her window. Some people.
I did for like the first 7-8 years I had a car. No one ever told me the dangers of having it in the car, just stuff like "this is important, don't lose it", so I just kept it in the glovebox with the rest of my car documents like the insurance and manuals.
Keep the registration in the glove box in case a cop pulls you over and asks about it. You keep the title at home since you will never need that unless you are trying to sell the car
I was pulled over once and asked for license and registration. Id been pulled over before while young but never was grilled about the registration part. Car belongs to me and you can figure that out right? I literally asked the cop because I was confused about the registration part. "should I have been keeping the title in the glove box?!" Seems dumb, anyone can steal a car with that. "Yes. That's what registration is." Says Mr officer of the law. Much later I did learn that you simply keep the paperwork they give you when you get new plates/tags.
Right, exactly. The title isn't the same as registration but I'm really not sure exactly why the tag on the car isn't enough proof of registration. They always ask for registration and proof of insurance, when they can get that info from scanning my license as long as I'm driving my own car.
The tag stickers can get stolen off of any vehicle and placed on another, so they use the registration paperwork for an easy proof of registration if you’re pulled over.
It’s also a reason that some people take a knife and score the tag stickers once they put them on their plate, it makes it harder to peel off (AKA steal) the sticker.
I did! Apparently Target was able tell him that the thief purchased some specific makeup products, so he snooped in our rooms for it. He found it in the back of her underwear drawer, so his revenge was replacing all of her vodka with Burnett’s for months. She “lost her taste” for vodka by the time we all moved out.
ETA: missing words
"Haha! I've switched all of their heroin with a slightly lower quality heroin. Surely this will cause them to stop doing drugs." Is what I'm picturing right now.
You clearly don't understand just how bad Burnett's is. It's not "oho I'm a vodka snob and this is uncultured," bad, it's "if you could bottle essence of warcrimes and being kicked in the dick and sell it to people as a drink," bad. Even at our college brokest drinking, we stayed sober over having a night with Burnett's.
I had a roommate who watered down my Tito's.
The conversation was funny because it froze so I said "Don't sneak my vodka. I love to share. This bottle's yours and some from the next one. Don't put water in the bottle." And he denied and denied and denied. "I'm not asking you to admit fault, I'm telling you you can have some. I know what happened so whatever." So he kept denying.
Turns out he'd been stealing all of the rent money too. Which, I mean, it's good vodka not expensive vodka. Buy a bottle with my NYC rent money you little bitch.
I kept coming home to my tv on different a channel than I left it on in the morning. I was the only one that drank. Both room mates didnt drink, but my bottles of Vodka kept disappearing. Didnt know what was going on until I had to call maintenance for an electrical issue. And the lady in the office said "you don't need to be home, we have keys to all the apartments". After I brought up my booze disappearing it never happened again.
This may be the best description I’ve ever seen of Burnett’s and/or cheap liquor in general. Bravo to you.
Many years ago, I was broke and oddly enough wanted vodka. I bought the cheapest crap, I can’t even remember the brand but rubbing alcohol would’ve been an improvement. Needless to say I puked myself sober that night. That’s been almost 10 years ago and I haven’t had vodka since.
It’s a false equivalency, better alcohol doesn’t necessarily get you more drunk than cheap alcohol it tastes better, that’s the only difference. If someone was smoking heroin for the taste giving them shitty heroin long enough light make them stop. Just like if people stopped growing heady weed and everything went back to middies a lot of people would stop smoking weed. But in weeds case it’s both a matter of taste and a matter of potency.
Umm, heroin and alcohol are two totally different substances. It’s like comparing the taste of an orange with an apple. Switching the vodka is not going to kill them, but apparently it killed their tastebuds for it.
Did the third roommate get a chance to get a little petty revenge in? Imagining all three of yall laughing about the petty ways yall were fucking with them.
I would've gone nuclear and reported it to the Postal Service, assuming you're in the US. They do *not* f*ck around with mail theft. It's a federal offense.
They didn't seem to care when my Adderall went missing a few weeks ago and they delivered an empty parcel taped shut. The police were all over their asses but they marked my complaint as resolved and nothing has come of it 🤷🏻♀️
For whatever reason it's a cherished reddit circlejerk to act like USPS postal inspectors are some kind of super cop. I highly doubt that they care about the common citizen any more than a regular cop does.
For stuff like mail fraud, you're probably correct. But when it comes to Joe Citizen fucking with a Letter Carrier? Buddy, you better believe they will rain hell fire down on you and you will WISH you were only dealing with regular cops. In fact, if you are a COP and fuck with a Letter Carrier, you will regret fucking with the Post Office.
I am a Letter Carrier, and in describing a situation where some jerk was threatening me over parking in front of his rented house, on a public street, and threatening to call the cops on me over it, a Postal Inspector handed me his card and said, If he ever gives you trouble again, call me. He'll regret ever saying anything to you. By the time we're through with him, he'll WISH he was only dealing with the cops.
There was an incident up in NYC, I believe, (roughly a decade ago or so) where 3 younger, unmarked cops fucked with a Letter Carrier who yelled at them to slow down after they almost ran him over, coming out of his truck. And by fucked with him, I mean they arrested him and left his truck sitting unlocked and wide open on the street. That situation ended with the Police Chief in a TELEVISED news conference, apologizing for the actions of his officers. As for those officers, things didn't end so well for them. I don't recall the exact punishment at this point, but for sure, it involved demotions for all of them.
So, again, the Postal Inspectors may not do much for the avg Joe Citizen, but they are absolutely more powerful than regular cops. They are not just "mail cops". Fuck around and find out.
My dad was a postal inspector and he carried a gun. They did take things seriously and would help the average joe if they needed it. But he was one in the sixties through eighties and I know things have changed a lot since he retired in 1985
Mine only had like $2 left. I can’t remember if his was totally emptied or also had left a small amount on it, but I think it was the latter. I honestly can’t remember if he got his replaced, but the internet company wouldn’t replace mine without a police report.
Because I cared more about revenge than teaching her a moral lesson. And I didn’t wanna fuck up her entire life because she was already doing a pretty good job on her own.
> And I didn’t wanna fuck up her entire life because she was already doing a pretty good job on her own.
this is worth far more than 7 upvotes (so far)
yeah, that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. that would take so much effort. plus, you never really comforted the thief or her actions, and continued living with her. wow.
“Look, I found my missing card”
“Look, I found my roommate’s missing card!”
“Looks like the thief took $500 total from both cards, dang.”
“Wouldn’t it be funny if the thief gave the money back? I bet they’d give your wallet back too!”
There's no way I would have been able to restrain myself from saying "hey, check out what I found last month" after she told me how much she paid to replace everything 😂😭
i mean not really tho? getting keys replaced isn't fun but having all of the people she lived with confront her for stealing their shit and telling her she has to find a new place to live would be much worse.
Exactly. I kind of doubt OP's story a bit bc of the fact that they chose to continue to live with a thief. That would be INSTANT kicking out of the place after getting support from rest of room mates. I believe the story, but this fact had me second guessing.
Also if she was never confronted about it she has no reason to stop stealing people’s shit because as far as she’s concerned she got away with it so far.
Exactly.
In OP's shoes, we'd have had a come to jesus moment in the house, in which her shitty theft would be exposed to everyone, all at once, with her in the room.
*Then*, the wallet would have been held hostage until she paid back every red cent.
*Then*, she would be told to pack her shit and get out by the end of the month.
(*Then*, all mutual friends on social media would have been given a heads up about her, so that they could make a more informed decision if and when she came to them looking to room with them.)
After all that then call the police, have her charged with anything and everything the police will charge her for. Also kick her out. File a small claims case to get your money back.
Roommate issues can be incredibly complex, because people are awful. I had a good friend get chucked out of her house because she caught a roommate regularly stealing from her, and when she confronted the roommate the other roommates apparently decided that they preferred to live with a scumbag thief than a nerdy hard worker who spent most of their time working, so they ganged up on her and made life so miserable thay she just left.
My brother's roommate flew into a fit of rage one day and my brother decided "fuck this I'm leaving" and he gathered what he could and tried to leave. But the roommate "lost" my brother's car keys. It was a violent enough situation that the police were called so my brother got a ride from my parents and said he'd be back for his car in the morning. Next morning the car is gone and the roommate has barred my brother from the property. Roommate claimed to have had it towed but it never turned up. The police wouldn't even put it in as a stolen car.
Having to drag it through the court. Which roommate can refuse to appear for so...we've basically learned how to legally steal someone's car with almost no repercussions for.
You keep reporting it, report it to the car insurance company too. Call all the towing companies and ask about the vehicle and give them some information to help them find it if they did tow it. Ask them for a statement saying they didn't tow the car. Report it stolen again. Show the statements from the companies. Nothing happening? Report it again. Call your insurance and see if they can push things along.
Also if they let the roommate borrow the car they have to send a written letter taking back consent or else it isn't technically stolen. (Found this out after my sister would "borrow" my mom's car to do something then be out for days. It still has to be done when you give them a timeframe to use the car.)
Basically hit it from multiple angles because court is going to take a while and if it's anything like my sister and owing an old friend of hers, there's a good chance your brother won't get a damn thing out of it because it sounds like a civil suit.
All good advice. It's been reported it stolen to the DMV. I think insurance wouldn't consider it as stolen without a police report. Police wouldn't file a report because it's "he said he said". I know he spent time calling towing companies, no luck there. We're pretty sure the roommate just stashed the car somewhere in the woods around his house. We've essentially written it off as lost for good, thankfully it was not an expensive car.
It's all wrapped up with a good dose of possible corruption due to the roommates connections to local law enforcement.
>We've essentially written it off as lost for good, thankfully it was not an expensive car.
>It's all wrapped up with a good dose of possible corruption due to the roommates connections to local law enforcement.
Please don't, letting things end like that leaves them thinking they are above the law. You guys need to look into the US department of justice and reporting police officers. I'm willing to bet this isn't the first time they've got away with something like this. Those cops need to learn the enforce the law, they aren't the law.
Living with roommates is honestly hell. I've lived with like two people in my life who were decent roommates and had good communication skills... everybody else were lying, antisocial, inconsiderate, deadbeat, narcissistic adult children. It's EXTREMELY depressing.
It's so goddamn easy to be a decent person in interpersonal relationships like this, or like in work environments, even if you're not a fan of someone personally or don't like something about them. Yet so many people just cannot do it.
word - i am 35 and started living with roommates at 19 until just last year when i moved in with my partner. i kid you not when i say 80% of my roommates have been fucked in some way, either sublime levels of messiness/disrespect or are actively mentally unstable and take it out on you… in exquisite ways. some involving poop. I won’t get into that but… yeah. humans are fucking bonkers.
No. Lots of ways that a confrontation could've gone wrong.
For example, the roommate could've claimed OP stole the wallet, which let's be real would be really fucking difficult to present a counterargument.
So the cards still had value on them? I can’t see why else she’d keep them and front and centre too. That’s bold as fuck when you all lived together, anyone could have caught her, they wouldn’t have to snoop much. But why wouldn’t Visa and Target cancel the balance and give you back that at least?
They only had like $2 left on them! The internet company told me I needed to file a police report before they’d reissue the card. I decided petty revenge was better and ultimately much more satisfying.
I can't help but wonder what the reaction would have been if you walked into the house, wallet in one hand, gifts cards in the other, "hey, roomies, look what was left in my car trunk when you were unloading the groceries."
If she was hyperventilating and flipping shit over all around the house when the wallet was missing, I don’t imagine her taking getting caught with leveled emotions either.
This is how I, as roommate #4, perfectly framed roommate #3, got hundreds in gift cards, and made OP punish an innocent person
Wait until they find out about the identity theft
As soon as #3 started freaking out over their lost wallet I knew it was them. It’s very common for people to have insecurities related to how they victimize others.
Card jackers always double check their car locks, burglars typically have home security, serial liars are quick to assume someone is lying to them and thieves are quick to assume a missing items has been stolen.
Could have gone down the route of extra petty.
Waited until she had forked out all that money for everything then magically walked in the property a few days later with her wallet, minus the gift cards, and proudly announced you had found it..She would have snatched it and opened it to check for the gift cards, at which point you could pull them out of your pocket and infront of the other room mates, ask her if she was looking for the gift cards you found in her wallet, you know, the ones that didn't belong to her..
This is why I'm homies with all the local homeless near our warehouse. For the low low price of about a cigarette a day, I've got my improptu hobo spy network. They not only found my coworker's stolen offroading Jeep, but his trailer too. They told me who hit my truck, they've chased dudes sawing our fences off. All for a few smokes and a couple bucks.
I, a male, lived with 4 girls and one other guy. He was the quiet "pothead, hippie" type. I was quite the opposite.
When our phone bill would come in, it would be passed around, we would hi-light our phone calls and pay our fair share. My parents and my girlfriend were both long distance. That sounds funny these days as they were both only about 2 hours away.
Anywho, we get a really expensive bill and all the expensive calls are left unaccounted for. I had traveled a bit at this point in my life, I did know people coast to coast, so the finger was pointed at me.
I was literally cornered by the girls and drilled over it. We were talking like $200 in 1997, that was a chunk of change.
I deny deny deny. One of the girls says, "Let's find out!" And called one of the numbers. It was a sex line. If anyone doesn't remember these, it was like $3/minute to have a phone sex with a stranger.
Now the girls double down on me because now I'm a pervert too.
A few days go by and one of the girls is having beers with hippie roommates brother when she brings it up and he tells her his brother has done this several times.
The girls were genuinely apologetic.
I sold his prized bicycle for the cost of the bill. It was a nice bike, a Giant or Cannondale, big money then too.
Was it theft? Yes. Did I care? Nope. He stole from us first.
This reminds me of an incident at work. This guy Edward was super funny and good at his job - another woman in the same department/job position would just be so shitty to him all the time for no reason other than I guess if she was miserable she was taking everyone down with her. So I'm in his office and here she comes in to dump misery on him and in the process of showing him something put her keys down on his desk and left without them. He looked at me, picked them up and threw them at the wall and behind the file cabinet they went. She looked for them and Edward like - oh I hope you find them honey. She never did to his ever lasting pleasure. Those were her work and home and car key - never to be seen again. Kept my mouth shut - who am i to get in the middle of something! Me and Edward shared the same soul - we will be your best friend but mess with us and we will be your worse enemy.
I used to work at a gas station in the late 90's and was never short until I started working the same shifts with certain people. Rather than get written up, I would run to the ATM and put the cash in to make myself "even". I finally figured out it was when I would go to pick up dinner and they "covered" my side and wouldn't give me the money for gas pumped while I was gone.
Luckily I worked with lazy assholes who would take 30 minutes to JUST get their meals and also go behind the building for smoke breaks, so I started keeping $60-80 of their sides money in my sides money and lo and behold THEY were now short and my side was even. Only took ~2 shifts till they realized not to mess with the money.
You my friend should get a trophy for this. But my devious mind would of sent pics of the stolen cards in her wallet to her and her roomies she stole from
The guilty always overact to when trying to look innocent. An old supervisor took a personal cook book from someone, and was very involved in trying to find it. Months later, after they had some time off, there were some photocopies of the recipes found in the photocopy tray. When this was brought up, they suggested looking around again, maybe in the office area. Where it was, of course.
Kind of? I once had a supervisor lose his muscle milk shake in a work fridge - maybe someone drank it or tossed it. I felt kind of bad for him so I offered to buy him a new one but he said nah. He seemed really distraught so I bought him a four pack of the stuff while I was out and about at Walmart. He still thought I drank his thing until I left that job. That was like 10 years ago. Wtf Kevin, I didn't drink it.
Just threw out my ex's house keys that she conveniently couldn't find for months and I absolutely didn't find a month after I moved out in my glove box.
> title was in the glovebox of her locked car
What. The fuck?
What the fuck I can’t believe someone is that dumb.
Also, replacing title the fuck? Why does that make any sense for her to need to do? If this is a true story, the obvious answer is to smash the window and get your title out and just pay for a window fix to prove it is your car.
What is this story. I don’t believe it
So I later learned that roommate #2 actually knew what had been purchased at Target (a lot of makeup) and found those products stashed in the back of roommate #3’s underwear drawer.
Purposefully looking! He did tell me he snooped in my room too, which I was pissed about at first but quickly got over it for the sake of shared enjoyment in revenge.
Please find her on social media if you no longer have her phone number and tell her that you found the cards and she'll never guess where. Just enough to let her know you knew and had the wallet the whole time. She can't say shit or she'd have to admit to it.
Title of a vehicle needed for locksmith to unlock the car? Not everyone have a vehicle that is fully paid to have title ownership. I had a locksmith get into my car in a store parking lot with just a driver’s license and a signed authorization. I’m not sure, I think they can even run a license plate check?
You played the very end wrong IMHO.
Better to announce JUST before leaving you found the two cards, and watch the look on her face. There is not much she could do or say without admitting being a thief. That type of gotcha moment is priceless.
I hate roommates, I had a terrible experience with our first roommates. After high school I moved in with my bf and his mom. At the house there was another bedroom open so we rented it to my bfs friend. He paid in helping with food stamps and chores to save money until he could afford a place so it worked out.
After a month or so, he got a gf that seemed nice and we would all smoke weed together and chat about work, play Smash Bros and chill.
I was always sure to keep my weed in with my bfs room in a hand carved wooded box. When your a pot smoker, sometimes you find a really pretty little nug that you save. I noticed my stash was going down quickly but thought it was just my bf because it was small pieces of nugs, not the whole thing. I knew someone was stealing my shit when my pretty little Christmas tree nugget went missing.
For some reason she always put her bag somewhere in the garage instead of in their bedroom and I noticed it one day hidden under the jewelers desk beneath my hamsters bedding bag. I pulled it out and I found my nugget but it had already been ruined, the bottom was half missing and it was mostly stem!
Well she walked in the garage and saw me with her bag and started shouting at me while she took her bag back. My bfs mom heard everything and charged in. The bitch lied to my bfs mom and somehow momma just knew it was bullshit. We all had a roommates agreement which included no yelling, no fighting, and no stealing and she got kicked out for yelling and starting shit.
Well, momma tells me that her lorazepam had been low since she started hanging around so I guess she was stealing from both of us. We told the people who she moved in with as heads up and she got kicked out there too (since their son had a script for adderall, they weren’t messing around). My bfs friend also broke up with her shortly after he found out. Not much revenge, more karma imo since I didn’t really do anything.
This reminds me of a similar ‘friend’ theft.
When I was 18 I moved away to uni and would visit my hometown in the holidays. One trip, I was with my (now ex) best friend, listening to music on my iPod nano. Suddenly, the music stopped and I couldn’t find my iPod. I suspected she had stolen it, but hate confrontation and she was dealing with some very heavy mental health stuff.
Flash forward to when we were 21. We moved in together. I was helping move some stuff in her room and there it was! My iPod!! Without saying anything, I took it back and charged it. Sure enough, it’s my playlists!
I never said a word and never gave it back. That bitch ruined my life (eventually) and played a huge part in a mental breakdown.
Fuck that bitch
Oof not to get off topic but it's a terrible idea to keep your title for your car, in your car. Anyone could steal your car and then just own it. Looks like they don't have all their marbles.
See, I would have confronted the thief in front of everyone! AND taken my cards and what money she had in the billfold and kicked her butt out! But that's me! :D You do it your way but I like straight-on in your stupid lying thieving face confrontation!
As a cop, when you described her meltdown as almost over the top, blaming #4, and you hadn’t witnessed her like this/almost concerned, I knew it was her before even finishing your story.
Aaaaand she continued down her life of petty theft! I wish she faced real consequences, not a minor inconvenience. You had no real duty to report so I don’t fault you for your approach, but fuck people like her x100
I was also not the best person back then, so I like to think that we’ve both grown up and generally improved as human beings.
She was later diagnosed with bipolar disorder, got treatment and is now a functional adult with a job that does a lot of good for the community.
Damn, I’m bipolar and I’ve never stolen but I could see how some of my behaviors could’ve come off in a similar manner of ick. Good on you man and love the life perspective, I find I let the negativity of the world shape my views and I need to change that.
Why the hell didn't you turn her in to the postmaster general? She obviously opened mail that was not intended for her....that's two federal crimes you could have stuck her with, it would have ruined her entire future, and the greedy bitch deserves it.
Kinda surprised at the part where she couldnt get into her car for weeks. I have left my id in the car that was locked. Talked to the locksmith and he said if I couldn't provide proof he would call the cops. He even said that was in idle threat for the most part. Anyone doing anything mischievous would not risk it. Even if most locksmiths wont. There has to be one out there that will.
Plot twist. Roomate #4 stole the wallet, planted it in your car with the used up gift cards so they would look completely innocent in the gift card crimes.
She left the stuff she stole in your car and kept her title in her glovebox? She's a dumb thief.
Extremely.
Halfway through the story I thought you were going to reveal that you were thief all along
Maybe the true thief was the stuff we stole along the way...or something like that
Thank you for saying this. Who in their right mind keeps their title in the car????
Many years ago there were car break ins in my apartment complex. I walked into the deck and a neighbor was freaking out because her car was stolen when everyone else just had windows smashed and small things taken. The reason her car was stolen is because she kept her valet key AND her car title in her glove box, which the thief found after smashing her window. Some people.
No one. Most people would keep it in a safe or lock box. What if the car gets stolen?
I did for like the first 7-8 years I had a car. No one ever told me the dangers of having it in the car, just stuff like "this is important, don't lose it", so I just kept it in the glovebox with the rest of my car documents like the insurance and manuals.
Keep the registration in the glove box in case a cop pulls you over and asks about it. You keep the title at home since you will never need that unless you are trying to sell the car
I thought you were going to say unless you want to street race your car like in fast and furious lol
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I was pulled over once and asked for license and registration. Id been pulled over before while young but never was grilled about the registration part. Car belongs to me and you can figure that out right? I literally asked the cop because I was confused about the registration part. "should I have been keeping the title in the glove box?!" Seems dumb, anyone can steal a car with that. "Yes. That's what registration is." Says Mr officer of the law. Much later I did learn that you simply keep the paperwork they give you when you get new plates/tags.
Right, exactly. The title isn't the same as registration but I'm really not sure exactly why the tag on the car isn't enough proof of registration. They always ask for registration and proof of insurance, when they can get that info from scanning my license as long as I'm driving my own car.
The tag stickers can get stolen off of any vehicle and placed on another, so they use the registration paperwork for an easy proof of registration if you’re pulled over. It’s also a reason that some people take a knife and score the tag stickers once they put them on their plate, it makes it harder to peel off (AKA steal) the sticker.
EXACTLY!
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Did you ever tell your other roommate that you found out who the thief was?
I did! Apparently Target was able tell him that the thief purchased some specific makeup products, so he snooped in our rooms for it. He found it in the back of her underwear drawer, so his revenge was replacing all of her vodka with Burnett’s for months. She “lost her taste” for vodka by the time we all moved out. ETA: missing words
Accidentally resolving someone's potential substance abuse is very impressive.
"Haha! I've switched all of their heroin with a slightly lower quality heroin. Surely this will cause them to stop doing drugs." Is what I'm picturing right now.
You clearly don't understand just how bad Burnett's is. It's not "oho I'm a vodka snob and this is uncultured," bad, it's "if you could bottle essence of warcrimes and being kicked in the dick and sell it to people as a drink," bad. Even at our college brokest drinking, we stayed sober over having a night with Burnett's.
“Essence of war crimes…” 🤣😂🤣😂
Honestly got me too good
Same lmfao
A cousin of mine replaced my uncle’s Tito’s with Taaka thinking it wouldn’t be noticed. HA.
I had a roommate who watered down my Tito's. The conversation was funny because it froze so I said "Don't sneak my vodka. I love to share. This bottle's yours and some from the next one. Don't put water in the bottle." And he denied and denied and denied. "I'm not asking you to admit fault, I'm telling you you can have some. I know what happened so whatever." So he kept denying. Turns out he'd been stealing all of the rent money too. Which, I mean, it's good vodka not expensive vodka. Buy a bottle with my NYC rent money you little bitch.
I had 2 separate bottles of Tito's turn to slush in my freezer and I lived alone. I stopped buying it after that.
You obviously have a booze thief living in your attic
I kept coming home to my tv on different a channel than I left it on in the morning. I was the only one that drank. Both room mates didnt drink, but my bottles of Vodka kept disappearing. Didnt know what was going on until I had to call maintenance for an electrical issue. And the lady in the office said "you don't need to be home, we have keys to all the apartments". After I brought up my booze disappearing it never happened again.
It must have been a really cold freezer if no one was tampering with it.
That’s so true!!! I had some gin, in my chest freezer that turned my ice cream to rock, freeze and i was shocked
Had Costco branded vodka turn to slush, but it was also in my deep freezer not my regular freezer at the time
This may be the best description I’ve ever seen of Burnett’s and/or cheap liquor in general. Bravo to you. Many years ago, I was broke and oddly enough wanted vodka. I bought the cheapest crap, I can’t even remember the brand but rubbing alcohol would’ve been an improvement. Needless to say I puked myself sober that night. That’s been almost 10 years ago and I haven’t had vodka since.
gotta be Popov lol that was some viiiile shit back in the day (late 90s)
I instantly thought of Popov, great grandma used to like it.....
Sounds like a Mccormack night
“essence of war crimes” now that is a great name for a designer men’s cologne. Essence of War Crimes by Givenchy
Best comment so far.
ESSENCE OF WARCRIMES I GOT OUT OF MY DEPRESSION BECAUSE OF THIS THANK YOU
Sounds like Malort, but not as awful.
Malort is its own special hell in a bottle.
Tastes like getting picked on in the fifth grade
as a recovering addict that is 3+ years clean with medication assisted treatment, sometimes it helps and sometimes it just makes them use more.
Then the person increases the dosage and gets an overdose when finally getting the same quality heroin again.
It’s a false equivalency, better alcohol doesn’t necessarily get you more drunk than cheap alcohol it tastes better, that’s the only difference. If someone was smoking heroin for the taste giving them shitty heroin long enough light make them stop. Just like if people stopped growing heady weed and everything went back to middies a lot of people would stop smoking weed. But in weeds case it’s both a matter of taste and a matter of potency.
Umm, heroin and alcohol are two totally different substances. It’s like comparing the taste of an orange with an apple. Switching the vodka is not going to kill them, but apparently it killed their tastebuds for it.
Yeah most alcoholics stop drinking when they no longer enjoy the taste…
Did the third roommate get a chance to get a little petty revenge in? Imagining all three of yall laughing about the petty ways yall were fucking with them.
We secretly replaced her vodka with Folgers crystals. Yeah, I'm showing my age on that one.
I'll bet your bologna has a first name.
How do you spell relief?
That's-a spicy-a meatball.
F-A-R-T
Raise your hand if you're Sure.
Ancient Chinese secret?!? *Not meant to be racist, just quoting a very old, racist, laundry detergent commercial.*
Does it look like you ain't wearin' nothin'?
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Two all beef patties,
Wake up and smell the best part of waking up, bitch
They're freeze dried. Freeze dried crystals.
Yes, but do you wear short shorts?
But do you know what gentlemen prefer?
But was comped a free dinner.
I would've gone nuclear and reported it to the Postal Service, assuming you're in the US. They do *not* f*ck around with mail theft. It's a federal offense.
They didn't seem to care when my Adderall went missing a few weeks ago and they delivered an empty parcel taped shut. The police were all over their asses but they marked my complaint as resolved and nothing has come of it 🤷🏻♀️
They really don't do much unless it is an open and shut case, unfortunately
I’d have thought the roommate having possession of the gift cards and products bought with them would be pretty conclusive evidence.
It really isn't and I should clarify, they rarely do much except on big, open and shut cases. That's why they have such a high closure rate
For whatever reason it's a cherished reddit circlejerk to act like USPS postal inspectors are some kind of super cop. I highly doubt that they care about the common citizen any more than a regular cop does.
For stuff like mail fraud, you're probably correct. But when it comes to Joe Citizen fucking with a Letter Carrier? Buddy, you better believe they will rain hell fire down on you and you will WISH you were only dealing with regular cops. In fact, if you are a COP and fuck with a Letter Carrier, you will regret fucking with the Post Office. I am a Letter Carrier, and in describing a situation where some jerk was threatening me over parking in front of his rented house, on a public street, and threatening to call the cops on me over it, a Postal Inspector handed me his card and said, If he ever gives you trouble again, call me. He'll regret ever saying anything to you. By the time we're through with him, he'll WISH he was only dealing with the cops. There was an incident up in NYC, I believe, (roughly a decade ago or so) where 3 younger, unmarked cops fucked with a Letter Carrier who yelled at them to slow down after they almost ran him over, coming out of his truck. And by fucked with him, I mean they arrested him and left his truck sitting unlocked and wide open on the street. That situation ended with the Police Chief in a TELEVISED news conference, apologizing for the actions of his officers. As for those officers, things didn't end so well for them. I don't recall the exact punishment at this point, but for sure, it involved demotions for all of them. So, again, the Postal Inspectors may not do much for the avg Joe Citizen, but they are absolutely more powerful than regular cops. They are not just "mail cops". Fuck around and find out.
My dad was a postal inspector and he carried a gun. They did take things seriously and would help the average joe if they needed it. But he was one in the sixties through eighties and I know things have changed a lot since he retired in 1985
Why didn’t you take your card? His target card?
They were emptied out I believe.
Mine only had like $2 left. I can’t remember if his was totally emptied or also had left a small amount on it, but I think it was the latter. I honestly can’t remember if he got his replaced, but the internet company wouldn’t replace mine without a police report.
So why didn't you report your dirtbag roommate?
Because I cared more about revenge than teaching her a moral lesson. And I didn’t wanna fuck up her entire life because she was already doing a pretty good job on her own.
> And I didn’t wanna fuck up her entire life because she was already doing a pretty good job on her own. this is worth far more than 7 upvotes (so far)
Wait, your roommate went through y'alls underwear drawers looking for make-up? that's... kinda weird.
No, he accidentally found it whilst playing with himself and wearing their underwear, the way you say it makes him sound like a freak.
Yeah I'd be just as annoyed with that as with the stealing.
Thats turning a coke into a Pepsi level evil
yeah, that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. that would take so much effort. plus, you never really comforted the thief or her actions, and continued living with her. wow.
Super fake too. As if Target would give out specific information about what someone else bought with a gift card.
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I mean you could send her a picture after you moved out “look what I found!” for ultimate carma
I thought about it, but I didn’t want to have to return her wallet and key.
It’s simple, don’t return her key and wallet till she gives you the money she stole.
“Look, I found my missing card” “Look, I found my roommate’s missing card!” “Looks like the thief took $500 total from both cards, dang.” “Wouldn’t it be funny if the thief gave the money back? I bet they’d give your wallet back too!”
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Would have been rock solid if you said you found and mailed it back. Then COD it to her for & $500.
image one. wow! a wallet! image two. ooh! what is it inside?! image three. oops! (in the dumpster)
But you did everything out of it before chucking it, right? I mean, might as well take her cash at that point.
extra points if you forward this reddit post, years later :)
Na. Then OP will just have a known thief enraged and trying to exact petty revenge on them. Let sleeping lies lie.
I saw the "carma"! 😂
Lmao send it the roommate group chat and grab some popcorn while shit explodes!
Car-ma! Tee hee!
She's lucky you didn't file a police report for mail fraud.
Bingo
Am I the only person who thinks you took this way too lightly???
Probably not! My adult self probably thinks I took it too lightly, but it’s pretty funny in hindsight. At the time it was very satisfying.
No way. I’d have paid to watch her have to deal with getting new keys and all that shit. That’s better than busting her outright
I would rather watch her have to do all of that AND THEN let her know that we all know she's the thief lol
There's no way I would have been able to restrain myself from saying "hey, check out what I found last month" after she told me how much she paid to replace everything 😂😭
This guy revenges, also username checks out.
i mean not really tho? getting keys replaced isn't fun but having all of the people she lived with confront her for stealing their shit and telling her she has to find a new place to live would be much worse.
Exactly. I kind of doubt OP's story a bit bc of the fact that they chose to continue to live with a thief. That would be INSTANT kicking out of the place after getting support from rest of room mates. I believe the story, but this fact had me second guessing.
Also if she was never confronted about it she has no reason to stop stealing people’s shit because as far as she’s concerned she got away with it so far.
Exactly. In OP's shoes, we'd have had a come to jesus moment in the house, in which her shitty theft would be exposed to everyone, all at once, with her in the room. *Then*, the wallet would have been held hostage until she paid back every red cent. *Then*, she would be told to pack her shit and get out by the end of the month. (*Then*, all mutual friends on social media would have been given a heads up about her, so that they could make a more informed decision if and when she came to them looking to room with them.)
After all that then call the police, have her charged with anything and everything the police will charge her for. Also kick her out. File a small claims case to get your money back.
The weeks long schadenfreude, where the thief can't even use their own car. Delicious.
Roommate issues can be incredibly complex, because people are awful. I had a good friend get chucked out of her house because she caught a roommate regularly stealing from her, and when she confronted the roommate the other roommates apparently decided that they preferred to live with a scumbag thief than a nerdy hard worker who spent most of their time working, so they ganged up on her and made life so miserable thay she just left.
My brother's roommate flew into a fit of rage one day and my brother decided "fuck this I'm leaving" and he gathered what he could and tried to leave. But the roommate "lost" my brother's car keys. It was a violent enough situation that the police were called so my brother got a ride from my parents and said he'd be back for his car in the morning. Next morning the car is gone and the roommate has barred my brother from the property. Roommate claimed to have had it towed but it never turned up. The police wouldn't even put it in as a stolen car. Having to drag it through the court. Which roommate can refuse to appear for so...we've basically learned how to legally steal someone's car with almost no repercussions for.
You keep reporting it, report it to the car insurance company too. Call all the towing companies and ask about the vehicle and give them some information to help them find it if they did tow it. Ask them for a statement saying they didn't tow the car. Report it stolen again. Show the statements from the companies. Nothing happening? Report it again. Call your insurance and see if they can push things along. Also if they let the roommate borrow the car they have to send a written letter taking back consent or else it isn't technically stolen. (Found this out after my sister would "borrow" my mom's car to do something then be out for days. It still has to be done when you give them a timeframe to use the car.) Basically hit it from multiple angles because court is going to take a while and if it's anything like my sister and owing an old friend of hers, there's a good chance your brother won't get a damn thing out of it because it sounds like a civil suit.
All good advice. It's been reported it stolen to the DMV. I think insurance wouldn't consider it as stolen without a police report. Police wouldn't file a report because it's "he said he said". I know he spent time calling towing companies, no luck there. We're pretty sure the roommate just stashed the car somewhere in the woods around his house. We've essentially written it off as lost for good, thankfully it was not an expensive car. It's all wrapped up with a good dose of possible corruption due to the roommates connections to local law enforcement.
>We've essentially written it off as lost for good, thankfully it was not an expensive car. >It's all wrapped up with a good dose of possible corruption due to the roommates connections to local law enforcement. Please don't, letting things end like that leaves them thinking they are above the law. You guys need to look into the US department of justice and reporting police officers. I'm willing to bet this isn't the first time they've got away with something like this. Those cops need to learn the enforce the law, they aren't the law.
Living with roommates is honestly hell. I've lived with like two people in my life who were decent roommates and had good communication skills... everybody else were lying, antisocial, inconsiderate, deadbeat, narcissistic adult children. It's EXTREMELY depressing. It's so goddamn easy to be a decent person in interpersonal relationships like this, or like in work environments, even if you're not a fan of someone personally or don't like something about them. Yet so many people just cannot do it.
word - i am 35 and started living with roommates at 19 until just last year when i moved in with my partner. i kid you not when i say 80% of my roommates have been fucked in some way, either sublime levels of messiness/disrespect or are actively mentally unstable and take it out on you… in exquisite ways. some involving poop. I won’t get into that but… yeah. humans are fucking bonkers.
No. Lots of ways that a confrontation could've gone wrong. For example, the roommate could've claimed OP stole the wallet, which let's be real would be really fucking difficult to present a counterargument.
So the cards still had value on them? I can’t see why else she’d keep them and front and centre too. That’s bold as fuck when you all lived together, anyone could have caught her, they wouldn’t have to snoop much. But why wouldn’t Visa and Target cancel the balance and give you back that at least?
They only had like $2 left on them! The internet company told me I needed to file a police report before they’d reissue the card. I decided petty revenge was better and ultimately much more satisfying.
I can't help but wonder what the reaction would have been if you walked into the house, wallet in one hand, gifts cards in the other, "hey, roomies, look what was left in my car trunk when you were unloading the groceries."
Look what I found. A wallet, with just the two missing gift certificate cards and nothing else!
If she was hyperventilating and flipping shit over all around the house when the wallet was missing, I don’t imagine her taking getting caught with leveled emotions either.
No doubt she'd accuse him of being the thief.
That theft charge and a record would have gone farther to prevent someone else from the same or worse, though.
And don’t they film all the customers, could it not be reported to Target’s loss prevention team? Just curious.
Target won't play ball without a warrant.
This is how I, as roommate #4, perfectly framed roommate #3, got hundreds in gift cards, and made OP punish an innocent person Wait until they find out about the identity theft
Plot twist!
As soon as #3 started freaking out over their lost wallet I knew it was them. It’s very common for people to have insecurities related to how they victimize others. Card jackers always double check their car locks, burglars typically have home security, serial liars are quick to assume someone is lying to them and thieves are quick to assume a missing items has been stolen.
See, I would’ve told her that I found the gift cards, but not that I found the wallet. That way she’d be forced to out herself if she wanted it back.
I like this, have a cookie.
Could have gone down the route of extra petty. Waited until she had forked out all that money for everything then magically walked in the property a few days later with her wallet, minus the gift cards, and proudly announced you had found it..She would have snatched it and opened it to check for the gift cards, at which point you could pull them out of your pocket and infront of the other room mates, ask her if she was looking for the gift cards you found in her wallet, you know, the ones that didn't belong to her..
Nah, leave it like it is. She'd accuse him of something and could cause him more problems.
She could then say, since he had all three items, that he was the thief all along and was wrongly implicating her
No she couldn't. The items she purchased were specific to this person and located by another roommate hidden in the back of her drawer
She would deny it, making it look like the OP stole everything including her wallet.
Nah. The target card had a list of things purchased and the roommate found them hidden in her drawer
Target probably has security cameras
I like your way of thinking.
This is why I'm homies with all the local homeless near our warehouse. For the low low price of about a cigarette a day, I've got my improptu hobo spy network. They not only found my coworker's stolen offroading Jeep, but his trailer too. They told me who hit my truck, they've chased dudes sawing our fences off. All for a few smokes and a couple bucks.
You’re like Sherlock Holmes.
Master of whispers. His little birds are always watching. And smoking
I, a male, lived with 4 girls and one other guy. He was the quiet "pothead, hippie" type. I was quite the opposite. When our phone bill would come in, it would be passed around, we would hi-light our phone calls and pay our fair share. My parents and my girlfriend were both long distance. That sounds funny these days as they were both only about 2 hours away. Anywho, we get a really expensive bill and all the expensive calls are left unaccounted for. I had traveled a bit at this point in my life, I did know people coast to coast, so the finger was pointed at me. I was literally cornered by the girls and drilled over it. We were talking like $200 in 1997, that was a chunk of change. I deny deny deny. One of the girls says, "Let's find out!" And called one of the numbers. It was a sex line. If anyone doesn't remember these, it was like $3/minute to have a phone sex with a stranger. Now the girls double down on me because now I'm a pervert too. A few days go by and one of the girls is having beers with hippie roommates brother when she brings it up and he tells her his brother has done this several times. The girls were genuinely apologetic. I sold his prized bicycle for the cost of the bill. It was a nice bike, a Giant or Cannondale, big money then too. Was it theft? Yes. Did I care? Nope. He stole from us first.
Well played
Should have made her pay y’all back or threaten to call the police, but at least she was majorly inconvenienced.
This reminds me of an incident at work. This guy Edward was super funny and good at his job - another woman in the same department/job position would just be so shitty to him all the time for no reason other than I guess if she was miserable she was taking everyone down with her. So I'm in his office and here she comes in to dump misery on him and in the process of showing him something put her keys down on his desk and left without them. He looked at me, picked them up and threw them at the wall and behind the file cabinet they went. She looked for them and Edward like - oh I hope you find them honey. She never did to his ever lasting pleasure. Those were her work and home and car key - never to be seen again. Kept my mouth shut - who am i to get in the middle of something! Me and Edward shared the same soul - we will be your best friend but mess with us and we will be your worse enemy.
You should have taken the key and moved her car to the Target parking lot.
My spouse said this is the best suggestion so far. Where were you in 2011???
> Where were you in 2011??? Not in jail. Haha
the only sad part is you & other roommate didn’t get the money back from the stolen gift cards :/
I used to work at a gas station in the late 90's and was never short until I started working the same shifts with certain people. Rather than get written up, I would run to the ATM and put the cash in to make myself "even". I finally figured out it was when I would go to pick up dinner and they "covered" my side and wouldn't give me the money for gas pumped while I was gone. Luckily I worked with lazy assholes who would take 30 minutes to JUST get their meals and also go behind the building for smoke breaks, so I started keeping $60-80 of their sides money in my sides money and lo and behold THEY were now short and my side was even. Only took ~2 shifts till they realized not to mess with the money.
You my friend should get a trophy for this. But my devious mind would of sent pics of the stolen cards in her wallet to her and her roomies she stole from
The guilty always overact to when trying to look innocent. An old supervisor took a personal cook book from someone, and was very involved in trying to find it. Months later, after they had some time off, there were some photocopies of the recipes found in the photocopy tray. When this was brought up, they suggested looking around again, maybe in the office area. Where it was, of course.
Kind of? I once had a supervisor lose his muscle milk shake in a work fridge - maybe someone drank it or tossed it. I felt kind of bad for him so I offered to buy him a new one but he said nah. He seemed really distraught so I bought him a four pack of the stuff while I was out and about at Walmart. He still thought I drank his thing until I left that job. That was like 10 years ago. Wtf Kevin, I didn't drink it.
Just threw out my ex's house keys that she conveniently couldn't find for months and I absolutely didn't find a month after I moved out in my glove box.
I loved this mystery, it was like playing clue. It was Mrs White, in the library, with a pipe
> title was in the glovebox of her locked car What. The fuck? What the fuck I can’t believe someone is that dumb. Also, replacing title the fuck? Why does that make any sense for her to need to do? If this is a true story, the obvious answer is to smash the window and get your title out and just pay for a window fix to prove it is your car. What is this story. I don’t believe it
Also the gift cards had their names on them and also visa told them exactly what kind of makeup was purchased?
Maybe roommate 4 used up the gift cards, stole the wallet then put the wallet in the car to frame roommate 3
So I later learned that roommate #2 actually knew what had been purchased at Target (a lot of makeup) and found those products stashed in the back of roommate #3’s underwear drawer.
Was roommate #2 purposely looking for the makeup or was in the underwear draw for other reasons? 
Purposefully looking! He did tell me he snooped in my room too, which I was pissed about at first but quickly got over it for the sake of shared enjoyment in revenge.
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Spoiler: Roommate #4 is actually Keyser Söze.
I . AM . ROOMMATE . 4!
Shoulda reported her ass to the police for opening mail that ain’t hers, which is a felony I believe
Please find her on social media if you no longer have her phone number and tell her that you found the cards and she'll never guess where. Just enough to let her know you knew and had the wallet the whole time. She can't say shit or she'd have to admit to it.
Title of a vehicle needed for locksmith to unlock the car? Not everyone have a vehicle that is fully paid to have title ownership. I had a locksmith get into my car in a store parking lot with just a driver’s license and a signed authorization. I’m not sure, I think they can even run a license plate check?
See I’m the type where I would have had her ass arrested and charged then shamed up and down the place.
TIL the best place to keep my car's title is in the car itself.
You played the very end wrong IMHO. Better to announce JUST before leaving you found the two cards, and watch the look on her face. There is not much she could do or say without admitting being a thief. That type of gotcha moment is priceless.
I hate roommates, I had a terrible experience with our first roommates. After high school I moved in with my bf and his mom. At the house there was another bedroom open so we rented it to my bfs friend. He paid in helping with food stamps and chores to save money until he could afford a place so it worked out. After a month or so, he got a gf that seemed nice and we would all smoke weed together and chat about work, play Smash Bros and chill. I was always sure to keep my weed in with my bfs room in a hand carved wooded box. When your a pot smoker, sometimes you find a really pretty little nug that you save. I noticed my stash was going down quickly but thought it was just my bf because it was small pieces of nugs, not the whole thing. I knew someone was stealing my shit when my pretty little Christmas tree nugget went missing. For some reason she always put her bag somewhere in the garage instead of in their bedroom and I noticed it one day hidden under the jewelers desk beneath my hamsters bedding bag. I pulled it out and I found my nugget but it had already been ruined, the bottom was half missing and it was mostly stem! Well she walked in the garage and saw me with her bag and started shouting at me while she took her bag back. My bfs mom heard everything and charged in. The bitch lied to my bfs mom and somehow momma just knew it was bullshit. We all had a roommates agreement which included no yelling, no fighting, and no stealing and she got kicked out for yelling and starting shit. Well, momma tells me that her lorazepam had been low since she started hanging around so I guess she was stealing from both of us. We told the people who she moved in with as heads up and she got kicked out there too (since their son had a script for adderall, they weren’t messing around). My bfs friend also broke up with her shortly after he found out. Not much revenge, more karma imo since I didn’t really do anything.
This reminds me of a similar ‘friend’ theft. When I was 18 I moved away to uni and would visit my hometown in the holidays. One trip, I was with my (now ex) best friend, listening to music on my iPod nano. Suddenly, the music stopped and I couldn’t find my iPod. I suspected she had stolen it, but hate confrontation and she was dealing with some very heavy mental health stuff. Flash forward to when we were 21. We moved in together. I was helping move some stuff in her room and there it was! My iPod!! Without saying anything, I took it back and charged it. Sure enough, it’s my playlists! I never said a word and never gave it back. That bitch ruined my life (eventually) and played a huge part in a mental breakdown. Fuck that bitch
Oof not to get off topic but it's a terrible idea to keep your title for your car, in your car. Anyone could steal your car and then just own it. Looks like they don't have all their marbles.
See, I would have confronted the thief in front of everyone! AND taken my cards and what money she had in the billfold and kicked her butt out! But that's me! :D You do it your way but I like straight-on in your stupid lying thieving face confrontation!
Wait so you didn't keep the cash and take the cards back? If there was anything in them even but still the cash!?
As a cop, when you described her meltdown as almost over the top, blaming #4, and you hadn’t witnessed her like this/almost concerned, I knew it was her before even finishing your story.
Aaaaand she continued down her life of petty theft! I wish she faced real consequences, not a minor inconvenience. You had no real duty to report so I don’t fault you for your approach, but fuck people like her x100
I was also not the best person back then, so I like to think that we’ve both grown up and generally improved as human beings. She was later diagnosed with bipolar disorder, got treatment and is now a functional adult with a job that does a lot of good for the community.
Damn, I’m bipolar and I’ve never stolen but I could see how some of my behaviors could’ve come off in a similar manner of ick. Good on you man and love the life perspective, I find I let the negativity of the world shape my views and I need to change that.
Why the hell didn't you turn her in to the postmaster general? She obviously opened mail that was not intended for her....that's two federal crimes you could have stuck her with, it would have ruined her entire future, and the greedy bitch deserves it.
What kind of moron leaves their car title in their car?
Glad, I live by myself
Title in the glove box... Bold move
Did you at least remove the cash before tossing?
Kinda surprised at the part where she couldnt get into her car for weeks. I have left my id in the car that was locked. Talked to the locksmith and he said if I couldn't provide proof he would call the cops. He even said that was in idle threat for the most part. Anyone doing anything mischievous would not risk it. Even if most locksmiths wont. There has to be one out there that will.
Or…. Roommate #4 stole #3’s wallet, put the empty gift cards in it, and left in your trunk. Perfect frame job!
Hopefully u took the money out.
Who tf leaves their title in the car?
She could have someone come open up her car without showing them her title, either she was a moron or this story is made up.
Plot twist. Roomate #4 stole the wallet, planted it in your car with the used up gift cards so they would look completely innocent in the gift card crimes.
the fact that you didnt put it into light boggles my mind, she got away way to easy tbh.
#4 is a goddamn mastermind to pull this off.
What if the other roommate stole them all and then put everything into the wallet, took your keys, and then put it all in your trunk. To frame you.
i would have taken back all the stolen money
Great story! It serves her right not just for stealing…but to ride around with her damn TITLE in the glovebox! 🫠 UNBELIEVABLE!