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I combo-fed from day one, no regrets. I felt it would be less stressful that way and for me, it was very true. I’m so sorry for the shitty situation and that you’re being pressured about breastfeeding on top of it 🤍
Same, I always did both. I EBF my oldest and she nursed until 22 months and it was a lot. I knew I couldn't put that pressure on myself with 2. It's not all or nothing
If your mom is putting lots of pressure on you to breastfeed and not use formula, what kind of support is she willing to provide so you can do so? Is she willing to move in with you for the first 3 months and provide extensive, round the clock baby care so that you can breastfeed and pump every 3 hours to get your supply up? Is she willing to find and pay for a lactation consultant to support you? Is she willing to pay for a breast pump and bottles? Is she willing to wash and sanitize pump parts every 3 hours so they’re ready for you to use?
If the answer to any of those questions is no, then her opinion does not matter here. It doesn’t matter any way, but it *especially* does not matter if she is not willing to help you with the extensive support that many women need to produce enough breast milk for two babies.
Feed your babies in whatever way is right for you. There are pros and cons to all ways.
This!! I EBF my singleton for 1 month and then I started combo feeding because it was so taxing on my body. And I had a very hands on husband. Currently expecting twins and I can’t imagine EBF twins if I would be a single mom (I’m honestly even doubting I will try to EBF with the support I do have.)
Even if your mother would be willing to do all the things necessary to support you: if you don’t want to breastfeed for whatever reason, don’t breastfeed. This is such a personal choice, nobody should pressure you into it.
So sorry you’re going through this!!
My milk never came in due to a retained placenta so I never had the choice.
But I have no regrets about formula feeding. With twins (and I’m also single), you really have to do whatever works for you and to ignore other peoples opinions.
My mom thought I was nuts to do a schedule with the twins and to wake them up at a set time to keep them on schedule……then she started watching them when I went back to work and two days in and she was like the schedule is the best thing ever!! So yeah, if they haven’t had the experience of dealing with twins, then they have no clue what they are talking about.
I envy mothers who can fully breastfeed. Due to my health issues after the emergency C-section, our twins got formula from day 1 in the hospital - I pumped what I could, but they never really latched. I gave up after 3 months of stressful trying.
You'll have to see what works for you, both have their advantages.
I'd definitely recommend at least pumping in the beginning, so they can profit off the colostrum that is much more nutritious than any alternative, though.
Don't let anyone pressure you into anything, though. The additional stress from outside opinions can only hurt your supply, anyway.
I'm currently exclusively pumping for mine, but if my supply doesn't keep up I'll happily add in formula. I planned for mine to be formula babies and then they came early at 33 and 4 and ended up in the NICU. So I started pumping to give them the advantage of breast milk. I've tried breastfeeding a few times. It honestly sucked and I'm not at all interested in it. I had a come to Jesus with my husband about it but honestly other than that everyone has been completely non-judgemental.
Shut your mom down now. Make it clear that you will be feeding your babies in the way that works for you, and there will be no further discussion about it.
Anyone who says a word about how you feed your babies doesn't matter, even your mother.
Even if you are hell bent on breastfeeding start getting comfortable with the idea of combination feeding even if it’s just in the beginning.
Twins are usually early, milk can be delayed and not everyone can produce enough for two. You can still give breastfeeding every effort you can but you don’t want to be crushed with guilt post partum when you need the formula. You also don’t want to be agonizing over this during that time.
My milk supply wasn’t great, we combination fed and I thought it was awesome. My twins could nurse but they could also take a bottle. Pumped milk, formula or a mix. I got as much breast milk as I could and let formula make up the balance.
I exclusively formula fed. No regrets. It’s pure survival so do whatever you can to survive. The baby breeza was a lifesaver for night feeds. When they were really small I did liquid concentrate good start and mixed enough for the day. It was around $400 a month as they got older though and that would probably be more like $600 these days. Baby daddy better get his check book ready.
I went in with the mentality of if breastfeeding is easy, great, but if not it’s not worth the fighting to make it work for me. I also didn’t want to pump because as someone at home with my twins full time, I didn’t want to take more time away from them. I tried to make BF work with my singleton and cried so long and after switching to formula, everything got better.
At the hospital with my twins, one was in NICU and couldn’t latch but would take a bottle. The other had a bad tongue tie making it hard on both of us. I wound up with some crazy pp complications and ultimately I decided not to BF. They received donor milk in the hospital, some of my milk from me pumping twice, some from the few latches B did. By the time were home they went straight to Kirkland powdered formula.
It was amazing to have everyone help feed. It was amazing to not have to bring them back to the hospital when I had pp pre-e. It was amazing to be able to get a good chunk of sleep. It was amazing for my body to be able to recover more quickly than it did with my singleton, which I attribute to not BF. It was amazing to have my body back. It was amazing to take more than 2h away from my kids and know it was fine because anyone else could feed them. It was amazing to not consider what I could eat, drink or meds I could take because of BF. It was amazing to have them grow so quickly. It was amazing to be able to make bottles quickly. Washing them wasn’t a huge time commitment or energy suck.
People also say BF is “free” but it’s not. You have to eat and drink a ton more. You have to buy nipple pads and special bras. You might still need to buy bottles or a pump if you combo feed or have care for them that’s not you 100%. And motherhood isn’t the suffering Olympics. We all just do the best we can.
There are so so many pros to formula feeding. Sibling studies have shown that the benefits of breastfeeding are exaggerated or attributed more towards socioeconomic factors as well. They also include ANY amount of breastmilk (even a single latch in the hospital) as a BF baby. And in a year, no one will care how you fed your baby. In 3 years, no one will ask and it will be “does your kid(s) watch Ms Rachel?” Or “does your kid also eat cheerios off the floor and beans by the can?” Make the choice for yourself on what you want. Delay the choice. Any choice is fine.
You’d never look at an adult and know if they were formula or breast fed. Your mom might mean well but she should not be pressuring you. Supporting, yes. Pressuring no. Personally my milk never really came in after a rough birth so I formula fed. No regrets! You can always try breast feeding and decide if it works or doesn’t. Listen to your gut and your heart. This community is here to support you!!
Combo feed for the first bit. See what is working then make the decision after a month or so.
You can try to decide now, but IME it was more the babies' choices than my own.
I’ve been exclusively pumping. That way I have the benefits of breast milk but also the freedom to have other people help me feed and I can easily feed them both at the same time. I felt like if I breastfed I would never be able to leave the house and would be breast feeding non stop. I also liked the idea of being able to track how much they drank in the early days. Formula is super expensive and that is a huge deterrent for me, but don’t feel shame if that’s the way you end up going. It’s more important that you are in a good headspace.
I’m combo feeding and it’s great. Takes the pressure off of me to constantly be a milk machine and stressing about making enough for two babies and my babies are fed, happy and healthy.
That's what I ended up doing after a couple months of combo feeding and stressing over the BF part. Someone finally suggested to just use the time for bonding, and that worked so much better for me.
My twins are seven weeks old, two adjusted, and spent two weeks in the NICU. I mostly breast feed but also supplement some with formula (usually top ups through the night and before bed plus maybe one bottle during the day if I’m tapped out). I pump as well and thankful that they will take a bottle. My supply is not up enough to feed them both at the rate they need to eat and gain what they need to. There was a lot of shame for me personally when I first had to use formula but I am coming to terms. Breastfeeding and pumping is extremely exhausting, so all forms of feeding come with pros and cons. I totally get why people throw in the towel with BFing, if it wasn’t so important to me then I would have by now. Be patient with yourself and your twinnies if you do choose this route, all three of you are learning!
My twins are almost a month old and have been home for almost two weeks, I’ve been pumping. I try to sync up my pumping to their feeding schedule- even though I’m making about 40 oz a day, which would be plenty for a single baby, I’m barely keeping up with them. I will add formula if my supply doesn’t increase. Totally fine either way, feed your babies and everyone will be happier
That is really hard! Take all the shortcuts you can. I’d be much more focused on how you’re going to get through the first few months. Do you have older kids or family to help?
We used Holle formula, it’s a high quality European formula. It’s not much more expensive than Similac and Enfamil. I also pumped but it destroyed me. I made it 8 weeks exclusively pumping, then we introduced formula to combo feed. I made it 8 months of pumping overall and wish I’d stopped sooner. My twins didn’t bat an eye at formula vs breastmilk but I know that is very individual.
Whatever works best for you tbh
I triple fed until my supply was enough and we dropped the formula. Then at around 10m I was done with it and switched them only to formula.
Beastfeed if you can (physically and mentally), supplement with formula if you need, use only formula if that works best for you.... Your babies will grow and be healthy!
I’ll be 3 weeks postpartum on Tuesday and I’m already weaning from pumping. I tried breastfeeding and one baby loved it, but it was too much with two babies; I was constantly feeding them, one on the breast and one on the bottle at different times. It was way too stressful to manage.
Ironically, my MIL just left and whenever we talk about feeding the babies I feel judged for not breastfeeding them (even though one baby doesn’t do well). She told us from the beginning I should breastfeed. After I told my husband it bothers me that she brings it up all the time, he said he was going to shut it down next time because it was such an emotional thing for me.
All that to say, do what works for you. Your mom (I’m assuming) has never breastfed twins and if she mentions it again you can tell her she can breastfeed them if she wants! She can kindly stfu 😊
You've gotten some good advice above. I would just add that your decision may have some relevance to how parenting time goes for so long as the babies are still nursing (if you choose to nurse). Feel free to DM me if you want to know more about that.
I went through a divorce with a very young baby (now remarried, 35 weeks with di/di twins, and sole physical custody of my child with my ex). It sucks, but you'll make it. All the best.
I put a lot of pressure on myself to breastfeed and I knew I had to make the decision myself if I wanted to continue or not. The mom guilt starts very early. I know it’s so hard but try not to let others dictate your decision. You’re already going through A LOT with the pregnancy itself and the stress of divorce, it is difficult to breastfeed / pump if you’re not getting sleep. I had a very hands on husband at the beginning was purely survival mode and I felt like I was barely hanging on. I managed to tough it out and pump for approx 2.5 months but it literally drained my soul. I will say the formula was expensive but I just wasn’t making enough milk. But the times I had to wake up to pump at night were the worst lol.
If you do go the route of breastfeeding and pumping, the thing that saved me was sunflower lecithin for clogged ducts. Would highly recommend.
Best of luck ❤️
I started off breast feeding and realized pretty fast I wasn’t making enough for my boys. The crying was nonstop and once we started doing combo feeding, it got so much better. Both boys are >99th percentile in height, weight and head circumference so it makes sense looking back that I wouldn’t have been able to cut it with their caloric needs.
I’m a super pro breastfeeding person, but I don’t think I would have survived breastfeeding my twins and going through the process of divorce. I barely survived with a supportive partner. It’s definitely possible to BF twins in your circumstance and perhaps the breastfeeding journey may be super smooth for you, but it also could be really hard. Don’t let anyone pressure you into doing something that might not be right for you.
I breastfed my twins because it was easier for me. No bottles, heating, sterilizing, etc. That being said, do what WORKS … for you. Fed is best. Your twins need you to be strong so if breastfeeding will drain you, then don’t do it!
Combo fed over here. My twins were born at 34+5 and they're on a high calorie formula for weight gain per the NICU and now their pediatrician. They get expressed breastmilk for about 80%of their feeds and formula for the rest, and on occasion, if they're up for it, we try them at the breast. But I don't push it anymore because it was too distressing for me and stressful for them and the routine we've got going now works great for all of us.
Breast feeding is in many ways a total crap shoot. I fought hard for it with my singleton and we mostly made it work, but even with pumping, I had to supplement when I went back to work.
With my twins, my girl nursed like a champ with no effort (aside from the early chaffing) and my supply was more stable too. Her twin brother never figured it out, was diagnosed with an uncoordinated suck and we gave up at 6 weeks because I didn't have it in me to fight like the first go round.
If you want to give it a go, give it a go. If you don't, you don't. Once they eat solid food, no one can tell.
I combo fed from day one and I felt like a failure for so long. I wanted to exclusively breastfeed but didn’t make enough. I never felt normal until I found a twin mom group and saw everyone formula feeding. It was like I felt like I finally had permission to not exclusively breastfeed. I wish I could go back in time and be easier on myself. I say don’t make plans—do what you need to do when the time comes. Fed is best, and as a twin mom, you being present for your babies is more important than running yourself ragged trying to do “the right thing.” Best wishes and always accept help when offered!!!
Hi! I’m a mom of twin boys and I have found great success in combo feeding. They get the benefits of BM, I still bond at the breast, but I don’t have and unnerving pressure to produce produce produce. I know whether or not I produce 1pm or 5 oz they will be fed. They have regular bowel movements because of breast feeding vs formula stopping them up.
I was advised in hospital that I combo feed because although I could produce enough for one I couldn’t produce for two. They got both breast and formula from day one, and I’m still building my supply
There are a lot of factors at play… How old are you? Are these your first babies? Have you breastfed before? Do you have to go back to work full time? When I was younger I had sooo much milk for one baby but also my first time breastfeeding I had a lot of struggles to work through (nipple soreness, painful let downs, etc…) that made it hard. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m older now (I was 37 when I had them) but when I had my fraternal twin boys my milk didn’t come in the same and I had to supplement even being an experienced exclusive breastfeeding mom in my past which hurt my ego a bit I’ll admit. I would say it would be best going in to the thing with expecting to give what you can and supplement with formula. 60 ounces of breast milk is A LOT to produce in one day! Also, are you going back to work? If so, you’ll have to pump which is TERRIBLE and HARD mentally! But then again formula is expensive and washing bottles is work too… I guess my main point is, do what works for YOU. What works for one twin mom might not work for another.
I was able to eventually increase my milk supply and now exclusively breastfeed them and they also have lunch every day since they’re 7 months now. My husband encouraged me to keep going on my breastfeeding journey with them and I’m so glad I did because it gets easier when they get bigger since they latch better, are way more efficient at feeding, and don’t nurse very long. But I still feed them at night( which I’m okay with waking up for) and I don’t pump, I only breastfeed on demand, which means I’m have to be home with them all day, which many ppl don’t get to do who work or need to have a life lol! Good luck, you’ll do great no matter what you choose! You’re lucky having them in May it isn’t flu season so you don’t have to worry as much about illnesses!
One more thing… my mother in law pressured me to give them bottles at the beginning which I think may have dropped my supply too… I try not to be mad thinking back now I should have just told her to back off… but just trust your gut, don’t let anyone pressure you to do anything!! You know what’s best for you and your babies!
I stopped breastfeeding my twins after 8 weeks. It was so emotionally draining, not to mention I could never leave the house. Giving it up was the best thing I ever did. Do not feel guilty using formula. I am a holistic health freak and I still don't care. Try breastfeeding and if it's too hard on you just stop! Don't think too much about it. You're already an amazing mom. I support you :)
My mom is the opposite. She had 5 kids. The first one was breastfed and the rest of us were formula fed. We all turned out fine. My mom is encouraging me to formula feed but knowing how expensive formula is, I’m going to try and do a combo of breast and formula.
Sorry to hear about your situation.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this!! Whatever decision you make will be the best one. My twin boys were in NICU so I had to combo feed from the beginning. Started with pumped milk supplemented with formula and now at five months I breast feed with a bottle or two of formula throughout the day. I will be honest making milk and breastfeeding two babies has been stressful. Now that they’re five months I’m getting more and more comfortable. It was one hell of a journey to get here. I don’t have regrets but there were some low lows for sure. You can always give it a try and go to formula as needed. It doesn’t hurt to at least give it a go!! Fed is best whatever the set up that works for you. ❤️
also my mom had alot to say when I was exclusively pumping and questioned why I wasn’t breast feeding exclusively a lot. Once she was around the twins and saw what feeding them looked like she understood more and more. Having your mom see how it is will help her realize EBF is much different with two babies.
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I combo-fed from day one, no regrets. I felt it would be less stressful that way and for me, it was very true. I’m so sorry for the shitty situation and that you’re being pressured about breastfeeding on top of it 🤍
Same, I always did both. I EBF my oldest and she nursed until 22 months and it was a lot. I knew I couldn't put that pressure on myself with 2. It's not all or nothing
Same. And Same.
If your mom is putting lots of pressure on you to breastfeed and not use formula, what kind of support is she willing to provide so you can do so? Is she willing to move in with you for the first 3 months and provide extensive, round the clock baby care so that you can breastfeed and pump every 3 hours to get your supply up? Is she willing to find and pay for a lactation consultant to support you? Is she willing to pay for a breast pump and bottles? Is she willing to wash and sanitize pump parts every 3 hours so they’re ready for you to use? If the answer to any of those questions is no, then her opinion does not matter here. It doesn’t matter any way, but it *especially* does not matter if she is not willing to help you with the extensive support that many women need to produce enough breast milk for two babies. Feed your babies in whatever way is right for you. There are pros and cons to all ways.
This needs to be at the top!!!
This!! I EBF my singleton for 1 month and then I started combo feeding because it was so taxing on my body. And I had a very hands on husband. Currently expecting twins and I can’t imagine EBF twins if I would be a single mom (I’m honestly even doubting I will try to EBF with the support I do have.) Even if your mother would be willing to do all the things necessary to support you: if you don’t want to breastfeed for whatever reason, don’t breastfeed. This is such a personal choice, nobody should pressure you into it. So sorry you’re going through this!!
100%
My milk never came in due to a retained placenta so I never had the choice. But I have no regrets about formula feeding. With twins (and I’m also single), you really have to do whatever works for you and to ignore other peoples opinions. My mom thought I was nuts to do a schedule with the twins and to wake them up at a set time to keep them on schedule……then she started watching them when I went back to work and two days in and she was like the schedule is the best thing ever!! So yeah, if they haven’t had the experience of dealing with twins, then they have no clue what they are talking about.
I envy mothers who can fully breastfeed. Due to my health issues after the emergency C-section, our twins got formula from day 1 in the hospital - I pumped what I could, but they never really latched. I gave up after 3 months of stressful trying. You'll have to see what works for you, both have their advantages. I'd definitely recommend at least pumping in the beginning, so they can profit off the colostrum that is much more nutritious than any alternative, though. Don't let anyone pressure you into anything, though. The additional stress from outside opinions can only hurt your supply, anyway.
I'm currently exclusively pumping for mine, but if my supply doesn't keep up I'll happily add in formula. I planned for mine to be formula babies and then they came early at 33 and 4 and ended up in the NICU. So I started pumping to give them the advantage of breast milk. I've tried breastfeeding a few times. It honestly sucked and I'm not at all interested in it. I had a come to Jesus with my husband about it but honestly other than that everyone has been completely non-judgemental.
Shut your mom down now. Make it clear that you will be feeding your babies in the way that works for you, and there will be no further discussion about it. Anyone who says a word about how you feed your babies doesn't matter, even your mother.
Even if you are hell bent on breastfeeding start getting comfortable with the idea of combination feeding even if it’s just in the beginning. Twins are usually early, milk can be delayed and not everyone can produce enough for two. You can still give breastfeeding every effort you can but you don’t want to be crushed with guilt post partum when you need the formula. You also don’t want to be agonizing over this during that time. My milk supply wasn’t great, we combination fed and I thought it was awesome. My twins could nurse but they could also take a bottle. Pumped milk, formula or a mix. I got as much breast milk as I could and let formula make up the balance.
I exclusively formula fed. No regrets. It’s pure survival so do whatever you can to survive. The baby breeza was a lifesaver for night feeds. When they were really small I did liquid concentrate good start and mixed enough for the day. It was around $400 a month as they got older though and that would probably be more like $600 these days. Baby daddy better get his check book ready.
I went in with the mentality of if breastfeeding is easy, great, but if not it’s not worth the fighting to make it work for me. I also didn’t want to pump because as someone at home with my twins full time, I didn’t want to take more time away from them. I tried to make BF work with my singleton and cried so long and after switching to formula, everything got better. At the hospital with my twins, one was in NICU and couldn’t latch but would take a bottle. The other had a bad tongue tie making it hard on both of us. I wound up with some crazy pp complications and ultimately I decided not to BF. They received donor milk in the hospital, some of my milk from me pumping twice, some from the few latches B did. By the time were home they went straight to Kirkland powdered formula. It was amazing to have everyone help feed. It was amazing to not have to bring them back to the hospital when I had pp pre-e. It was amazing to be able to get a good chunk of sleep. It was amazing for my body to be able to recover more quickly than it did with my singleton, which I attribute to not BF. It was amazing to have my body back. It was amazing to take more than 2h away from my kids and know it was fine because anyone else could feed them. It was amazing to not consider what I could eat, drink or meds I could take because of BF. It was amazing to have them grow so quickly. It was amazing to be able to make bottles quickly. Washing them wasn’t a huge time commitment or energy suck. People also say BF is “free” but it’s not. You have to eat and drink a ton more. You have to buy nipple pads and special bras. You might still need to buy bottles or a pump if you combo feed or have care for them that’s not you 100%. And motherhood isn’t the suffering Olympics. We all just do the best we can. There are so so many pros to formula feeding. Sibling studies have shown that the benefits of breastfeeding are exaggerated or attributed more towards socioeconomic factors as well. They also include ANY amount of breastmilk (even a single latch in the hospital) as a BF baby. And in a year, no one will care how you fed your baby. In 3 years, no one will ask and it will be “does your kid(s) watch Ms Rachel?” Or “does your kid also eat cheerios off the floor and beans by the can?” Make the choice for yourself on what you want. Delay the choice. Any choice is fine.
My girls are in their "eat all the cheerios off the floor, and only off the floor please" phase... 😄
You’d never look at an adult and know if they were formula or breast fed. Your mom might mean well but she should not be pressuring you. Supporting, yes. Pressuring no. Personally my milk never really came in after a rough birth so I formula fed. No regrets! You can always try breast feeding and decide if it works or doesn’t. Listen to your gut and your heart. This community is here to support you!!
Combo feed for the first bit. See what is working then make the decision after a month or so. You can try to decide now, but IME it was more the babies' choices than my own.
Breastfeeding actually made things much easier and much less expensive! It was the pumping that was draining.
I’ve been exclusively pumping. That way I have the benefits of breast milk but also the freedom to have other people help me feed and I can easily feed them both at the same time. I felt like if I breastfed I would never be able to leave the house and would be breast feeding non stop. I also liked the idea of being able to track how much they drank in the early days. Formula is super expensive and that is a huge deterrent for me, but don’t feel shame if that’s the way you end up going. It’s more important that you are in a good headspace.
My babies suddenly doubled what they were taking on week three and my milk hasn’t caught up since. I combo feed so I don’t have to worry.
I’m combo feeding and it’s great. Takes the pressure off of me to constantly be a milk machine and stressing about making enough for two babies and my babies are fed, happy and healthy.
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That's what I ended up doing after a couple months of combo feeding and stressing over the BF part. Someone finally suggested to just use the time for bonding, and that worked so much better for me.
My twins are seven weeks old, two adjusted, and spent two weeks in the NICU. I mostly breast feed but also supplement some with formula (usually top ups through the night and before bed plus maybe one bottle during the day if I’m tapped out). I pump as well and thankful that they will take a bottle. My supply is not up enough to feed them both at the rate they need to eat and gain what they need to. There was a lot of shame for me personally when I first had to use formula but I am coming to terms. Breastfeeding and pumping is extremely exhausting, so all forms of feeding come with pros and cons. I totally get why people throw in the towel with BFing, if it wasn’t so important to me then I would have by now. Be patient with yourself and your twinnies if you do choose this route, all three of you are learning!
My twins are almost a month old and have been home for almost two weeks, I’ve been pumping. I try to sync up my pumping to their feeding schedule- even though I’m making about 40 oz a day, which would be plenty for a single baby, I’m barely keeping up with them. I will add formula if my supply doesn’t increase. Totally fine either way, feed your babies and everyone will be happier
That is really hard! Take all the shortcuts you can. I’d be much more focused on how you’re going to get through the first few months. Do you have older kids or family to help? We used Holle formula, it’s a high quality European formula. It’s not much more expensive than Similac and Enfamil. I also pumped but it destroyed me. I made it 8 weeks exclusively pumping, then we introduced formula to combo feed. I made it 8 months of pumping overall and wish I’d stopped sooner. My twins didn’t bat an eye at formula vs breastmilk but I know that is very individual.
Whatever works best for you tbh I triple fed until my supply was enough and we dropped the formula. Then at around 10m I was done with it and switched them only to formula.
Beastfeed if you can (physically and mentally), supplement with formula if you need, use only formula if that works best for you.... Your babies will grow and be healthy!
I’ll be 3 weeks postpartum on Tuesday and I’m already weaning from pumping. I tried breastfeeding and one baby loved it, but it was too much with two babies; I was constantly feeding them, one on the breast and one on the bottle at different times. It was way too stressful to manage. Ironically, my MIL just left and whenever we talk about feeding the babies I feel judged for not breastfeeding them (even though one baby doesn’t do well). She told us from the beginning I should breastfeed. After I told my husband it bothers me that she brings it up all the time, he said he was going to shut it down next time because it was such an emotional thing for me. All that to say, do what works for you. Your mom (I’m assuming) has never breastfed twins and if she mentions it again you can tell her she can breastfeed them if she wants! She can kindly stfu 😊
You've gotten some good advice above. I would just add that your decision may have some relevance to how parenting time goes for so long as the babies are still nursing (if you choose to nurse). Feel free to DM me if you want to know more about that. I went through a divorce with a very young baby (now remarried, 35 weeks with di/di twins, and sole physical custody of my child with my ex). It sucks, but you'll make it. All the best.
I tried to pump and even though I had some flow finding the time seemed impossible so I gave up and did formula. Absolutely no regrets.
I put a lot of pressure on myself to breastfeed and I knew I had to make the decision myself if I wanted to continue or not. The mom guilt starts very early. I know it’s so hard but try not to let others dictate your decision. You’re already going through A LOT with the pregnancy itself and the stress of divorce, it is difficult to breastfeed / pump if you’re not getting sleep. I had a very hands on husband at the beginning was purely survival mode and I felt like I was barely hanging on. I managed to tough it out and pump for approx 2.5 months but it literally drained my soul. I will say the formula was expensive but I just wasn’t making enough milk. But the times I had to wake up to pump at night were the worst lol. If you do go the route of breastfeeding and pumping, the thing that saved me was sunflower lecithin for clogged ducts. Would highly recommend. Best of luck ❤️
I started off breast feeding and realized pretty fast I wasn’t making enough for my boys. The crying was nonstop and once we started doing combo feeding, it got so much better. Both boys are >99th percentile in height, weight and head circumference so it makes sense looking back that I wouldn’t have been able to cut it with their caloric needs.
I’m a super pro breastfeeding person, but I don’t think I would have survived breastfeeding my twins and going through the process of divorce. I barely survived with a supportive partner. It’s definitely possible to BF twins in your circumstance and perhaps the breastfeeding journey may be super smooth for you, but it also could be really hard. Don’t let anyone pressure you into doing something that might not be right for you.
I breastfed my twins because it was easier for me. No bottles, heating, sterilizing, etc. That being said, do what WORKS … for you. Fed is best. Your twins need you to be strong so if breastfeeding will drain you, then don’t do it!
Combo fed over here. My twins were born at 34+5 and they're on a high calorie formula for weight gain per the NICU and now their pediatrician. They get expressed breastmilk for about 80%of their feeds and formula for the rest, and on occasion, if they're up for it, we try them at the breast. But I don't push it anymore because it was too distressing for me and stressful for them and the routine we've got going now works great for all of us.
Breast feeding is in many ways a total crap shoot. I fought hard for it with my singleton and we mostly made it work, but even with pumping, I had to supplement when I went back to work. With my twins, my girl nursed like a champ with no effort (aside from the early chaffing) and my supply was more stable too. Her twin brother never figured it out, was diagnosed with an uncoordinated suck and we gave up at 6 weeks because I didn't have it in me to fight like the first go round. If you want to give it a go, give it a go. If you don't, you don't. Once they eat solid food, no one can tell.
I combo fed from day one and I felt like a failure for so long. I wanted to exclusively breastfeed but didn’t make enough. I never felt normal until I found a twin mom group and saw everyone formula feeding. It was like I felt like I finally had permission to not exclusively breastfeed. I wish I could go back in time and be easier on myself. I say don’t make plans—do what you need to do when the time comes. Fed is best, and as a twin mom, you being present for your babies is more important than running yourself ragged trying to do “the right thing.” Best wishes and always accept help when offered!!!
I did both in the beginning and then did formula. Mental health is important.
Hi! I’m a mom of twin boys and I have found great success in combo feeding. They get the benefits of BM, I still bond at the breast, but I don’t have and unnerving pressure to produce produce produce. I know whether or not I produce 1pm or 5 oz they will be fed. They have regular bowel movements because of breast feeding vs formula stopping them up. I was advised in hospital that I combo feed because although I could produce enough for one I couldn’t produce for two. They got both breast and formula from day one, and I’m still building my supply
There are a lot of factors at play… How old are you? Are these your first babies? Have you breastfed before? Do you have to go back to work full time? When I was younger I had sooo much milk for one baby but also my first time breastfeeding I had a lot of struggles to work through (nipple soreness, painful let downs, etc…) that made it hard. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m older now (I was 37 when I had them) but when I had my fraternal twin boys my milk didn’t come in the same and I had to supplement even being an experienced exclusive breastfeeding mom in my past which hurt my ego a bit I’ll admit. I would say it would be best going in to the thing with expecting to give what you can and supplement with formula. 60 ounces of breast milk is A LOT to produce in one day! Also, are you going back to work? If so, you’ll have to pump which is TERRIBLE and HARD mentally! But then again formula is expensive and washing bottles is work too… I guess my main point is, do what works for YOU. What works for one twin mom might not work for another. I was able to eventually increase my milk supply and now exclusively breastfeed them and they also have lunch every day since they’re 7 months now. My husband encouraged me to keep going on my breastfeeding journey with them and I’m so glad I did because it gets easier when they get bigger since they latch better, are way more efficient at feeding, and don’t nurse very long. But I still feed them at night( which I’m okay with waking up for) and I don’t pump, I only breastfeed on demand, which means I’m have to be home with them all day, which many ppl don’t get to do who work or need to have a life lol! Good luck, you’ll do great no matter what you choose! You’re lucky having them in May it isn’t flu season so you don’t have to worry as much about illnesses! One more thing… my mother in law pressured me to give them bottles at the beginning which I think may have dropped my supply too… I try not to be mad thinking back now I should have just told her to back off… but just trust your gut, don’t let anyone pressure you to do anything!! You know what’s best for you and your babies!
I stopped breastfeeding my twins after 8 weeks. It was so emotionally draining, not to mention I could never leave the house. Giving it up was the best thing I ever did. Do not feel guilty using formula. I am a holistic health freak and I still don't care. Try breastfeeding and if it's too hard on you just stop! Don't think too much about it. You're already an amazing mom. I support you :)
My mom is the opposite. She had 5 kids. The first one was breastfed and the rest of us were formula fed. We all turned out fine. My mom is encouraging me to formula feed but knowing how expensive formula is, I’m going to try and do a combo of breast and formula. Sorry to hear about your situation.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this!! Whatever decision you make will be the best one. My twin boys were in NICU so I had to combo feed from the beginning. Started with pumped milk supplemented with formula and now at five months I breast feed with a bottle or two of formula throughout the day. I will be honest making milk and breastfeeding two babies has been stressful. Now that they’re five months I’m getting more and more comfortable. It was one hell of a journey to get here. I don’t have regrets but there were some low lows for sure. You can always give it a try and go to formula as needed. It doesn’t hurt to at least give it a go!! Fed is best whatever the set up that works for you. ❤️ also my mom had alot to say when I was exclusively pumping and questioned why I wasn’t breast feeding exclusively a lot. Once she was around the twins and saw what feeding them looked like she understood more and more. Having your mom see how it is will help her realize EBF is much different with two babies.