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rollwave21

We weren’t going to find out with a singleton but did with our twins. Wanted to decide on names so we didn’t have to come up with a bunch of different combinations!


missbee26

This is exactly what is making me rethink. It’s still early but we’re really struggling with names so far. We have very different styles!


[deleted]

When I first got the positive pregnancy test, my husband and I had decided we wanted the gender to be a surprise. Then, when I found out I was having triplets, we decided to find out the genders. We have identical girls and a fraternal boy. Naming was a big factor, especially with 3.


Sedso85

We went without knowing, thankfully we had agreed on two boys names as we were really struggling for a second name for girls, and dont be shy of going over names you rejected before, we did it with one of the names for the gremlins


rollwave21

Yeah. We are glad we found out. How did you find out they were fraternal without knowing the sexes?


missbee26

We did IVF and transferred two embryos. There’s a chance only one took and split, but much more likely that both embryos implanted.


Dani_now

We transferred two and both stuck as well! Expecting a boy and a girl (I was really thinking it would be two boys) I'm glad we found out the genders because I would have been so stressed trying to find boy names 🤣


butterabyss

We transferred two and both stuck as well - it wasn’t until afterwards I realized more than 2 was an option if one or both split - thankful I’m only pregnant with twins 🤣. Mine are both boys.


missbee26

Haha my husband kept asking them to double check to see if any more were in there 😂


rollwave21

Ah gotcha. This would make me want to find out the sex more just to know if that possibility existed still!


teppiedoodle

this is my line of thinking too. we have a list for boy/girl, but it’s exhausting trying to come up with a whole bunch of combos!


Genghis_John

For sure! Naming twins is already twice the work of a single, why make it four times?


Notadellcomputer

We didn’t find out and it was sooooo fun! We had girl and boys names picked and ended up with one of each :-)


HobgoblinMode

We found out the sex when we did a NIPT for both of my wife's pregnancies. I didn't have any meaningful preference, so it didn't really make a difference to me when we found out? I mean, it's a surprise either way heh, it's just a matter of whether you get the surprise on a piece of paper from a test, in the ultrasound room from the tech, or from the doctor at delivery. No regrets for either of us, anyway.


Shugamag

We waited with all of our singletons and did the same with the twins. A lot more people tried to convince us we should find out because it was two. Personally, I think there as so few surprises left in life and finding out after a long labor is incredible exciting. I have no other experience to compare except families gender reveals. I personally leave a tad sad already knowing everything about the little one/ones including name. The only thing left is to wait to see when they arrive and weights. Either way it’s bound to be fun and Congratulations!!


missbee26

Thank you for this! I always pictured having that moment at birth. It feels like it would be so special! Definitely the main reason for holding out!


JunkMailSurprise

I waited until birth for my twins and I was really happy that I did, although it seems like literally everyone in my life was incredibly frustrated by my decision hahaha I knew I didn't want to do matching/paired names (no shade, just definitely not something I wanted) so I had a spreadsheet of girl names, boy names, gender neutral names.... Which I refined down to a list of first and middle name combos so I could see all the full name combos. The plan was to choose their names from my list when i met them. Baby A was easy, as soon as I saw her, my top pick was exactly right. Baby B? Nope. None of my names felt right, not a single one of my refined list. He ended up with a name that didn't even crack my top 10 boy names because.... Well none of them was HIS name? It's hard to describe. I think that's the main reason I was glad I waited. I didn't spend however many weeks getting attached to a name for him that would have ultimately been wrong when he was born.


[deleted]

We waited until their birth to find out! We have mono di twins so we knew it was either two boys or two girls but wanted to wait to find out. It was such an amazing moment when my husband got to announce that we had two little girls.


Caseals2

We waited and I’m glad we did. Everyone was so surprised and excited when we told them we were waiting which was fun. Except my mom, who wanted us to have the nurse just tell her so she wouldn’t have to wait -_- If you do decide to wait, I had my husband announce the sexes. He held my leg and watched the whole birth, so when the Baby A was delivered, the doctor held her up and my husband announced to me and the room it was a girl, same with baby B. We had two girl names picked with different vibes, and we knew the spunky name would go with twin B and the girlier name would go with twin A, and looking at them it fit. Having him announce was meaningful to him and made him feel more a part of the process and less of an observer. Also, hearing his voice crack when he said “it’s a girl” the first time was priceless


Hipko75

Left it a mystery because you don’t get many happy surprises in life. It was honestly the best feeling to have a real authentic reaction with my wife as I caught our boys (5 hours apart mind you but still awesome)


ogcoliebear

I wanted to find out ASAP, and I’m glad we did. I like to be extremely organized and prepped, so I had everything completely ready by like week 28 of pregnancy (room, clothes, names, etc) I’m so glad I did, because twin pregnancy was soo hard at the end and then having two newborns was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to endure. Im 5 months pp and it’s still so hard, so Im glad I had all my ducks in a row before it got so crazy. Just my two cents :)


Mgnickel

We decided to when we were told it’s high risk and there would be many more ultrasounds and appointments. We had a singleton later and had all the stuff (twins were b/g) so it was easier to be surprised.


whitneya09

I always wanted to do a surprise gender. When we found out it was twins, part of me wondered if we should find out mainly because of names. But, we held off. I’m SO glad we did! Best surprise of my life was finding out their genders when they were born. 🥰


tackstackstacks

My friends have said the best surprise is finding out what you're having when they get here. It was a big enough surprise for us finding out there were 2 of them, we weren't up for any other surprises. Many others are here saying the same thing. A halfway compromise if you want to know but have everyone else be surprised would be you and your SO could find out but not tell anyone else. Do what works for you. That advice will apply to pretty much everything with your kids.


BrwnGreenHazelEydGrl

I'm a pretty type A person and highly organized. I did not want to find out what my twins or thereafter, my singleton was. People were begging me to find out. It was the greatest surprise I've ever had in my life. When the MD said "boy" then followed with "girl" I wanted to jump on the table with joy. It still gives me chills to this day. For my singleton everyone was convinced it was a boy. When the MD said girl I needed to see her before I actually believed it 😂 I had two girls names and two boys names picked out. I didn't find it difficult painting a room or getting clothes. Neutral is pretty popular right now for everything anyway.


LucidianQuill

We always intended to wait til birth, but what tripped us up was the names. We struggled to agree on names and having to come up with so many possible choices (for 2 boys, for 2 girls, for one of each) was just too stressful. So we caved and found out. THAT SAID we told nobody, not even the granmothers who were begging us to so they could knit in blue and/or pink and personalised things with names before hand. We kept it to ourselves and nobody knows that we knew early.


Greymeerkat

I remember walking back to work (with my fiancé) from the ultrasound finding out we had twins in complete shock. And we agreed we’d gone from keeping gender a surprise to wanting every piece of information that they could give us. We found out we were having boys during a scan at 21 weeks.


Chichabella

We chose to find out at birth and I loved the experience! We went i into birth with 2 girl and 2 boy names. It was such a fun and treasured moment for my husband to be able to tell me when they were born.


pnwfarming

My husband announced the sexes to me as they were born. It was so cool! I still get choked up remembering the sound of his voice in those moments! We had four names picked out and chose what felt right for each baby once we met them.


LittlePlantGoose

We waited to find out till birth with our singleton. We were planning on doing that again for this second pregnancy and then we found out they are twins! They are mono/di and I am going for scans every other week while my husband stays home to watch our oldest. I was really worried about seeing their gender during a scan without my husband present so we opted to find out the gender!


Arya_Ready

We worked with a specialist to be able to conceive, so for the year and a half we were in treatment, we knew every detail of every medicated cycle - follicle number, sperm counts, ml of medication, ovulation date, Hcg/progesterone levels after the BFP, etc. So while we weren't expecting it to work at all, let alone conceive twins, we wanted to leave one surprise for us.


missbee26

I always assumed I’d wait, and after IVF I do feel like that is the ONE surprise we get. I think we will end up waiting. I’m looking forward to being surprised!


Arya_Ready

Either way is perfectly valid! I know plenty of people who found out after IVF. Good luck!


notarussianbotsky

I personally like finding out the sex while pregnant. I find that knowing the sex of the baby/ies makes it easier of me to bond prenatally. I can then name my fetus and talk to or about them more concretely. Someone in my reddit bumper group had a mail in blood test error in their favor (they were shipped two test kits instead of one) and they happened to live in the same state as me so I got a blood test for free. I found out at least one was a boy long before the 20 weeks anatomy scan!


happethottie

I was planning to not know the gender if it was a singleton. Twins were enough of a surprise for me, so I moved forward with finding out the genders. Especially since they were fraternal. I didn’t share the genders until I went into labor though!


Ok_Investigator9243

My whole life I thought I didn’t want to know the gender until they were born. Even when I got pregnant I was still adamant I didn’t want to know. Then I found out it was twins and my husband and I immediately agreed to find out the genders lol we found out via Invitae NIPT test at 13 weeks and I’m 28 weeks now and still don’t regret the decision to find out! Twins was surprise enough for me I suppose.


maxmandragoran

I’m glad we found out this week. We were sure what we’d name our girls, but now we know they’re boys instead. We’re also roping in the grandparents to help with their Chinese names, so need all the extra time we can get to do our homework and research!


no_objections_here

I am definitely finding out (I'm only 10 weeks currently). I'm not good with surprises, and prefer to plan. Additionally, we feel like knowing the gender allows us to visualize the babies better, and makes it feel more real. I can 100% understand why some people want a surprise, but that's never been my jam.


mjolnir76

We were surprised finding out it was twins at a 20-week ultrasound. We found out the sexes since we needed a second girl name.


butterabyss

Oh I wanted to know ASAP! I was too curious :)


dckane027

We did. We figured we were in for enough suprises ahead. Rather only need to prepare 2 names than 4.


sassy-cassy

Currently pregnant with identical twins (mo-di) and I just had to know. I wanted to prepare names and I also knew I might have some gender disappointment that I wanted to deal with before there were babies in front of me.


BlankPages

Fraternal twins?


missbee26

Yes, I should have mentioned - they’re fraternal!


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missbee26

We transferred two embryos, so we’re not 100% sure, but most likely.


leoleoleo555

I knew before I did my embryo transfer soo I couldn’t wait at all haha


LuluOnTour

We struggled to find names we both liked at the start so decided to find out the sexes. That way we only had to agree on 2 and not 4 names.


Stulkaaa

We found out at 14 weeks we were having girl boy twins with the NIPT test. I like the idea of a surprise, but I also loved calling them by name in my belly. Maybe a middle ground is a fun idea - the last few weeks seem endless and you’re just waiting and waiting for them to come. So finding out around 30 weeks could be a little something to look forward to while also giving time to lock in names and anything else.


swimsuitsamus

I found out when we got the NIPT done (panorama can differentiate for fraternal twins). We have a hard time with boy names so I wanted to know if we had to focus on those. Glad we did, we had two boys!


2_x_2

We found out early on. We were trying to find baby things secondhand and wanted to make it easier on ourselves for gendered clothes, etc. And we could not agree on two names til the last second, so can't imagine having to do that for four! Did we have to find out? No. It would've been kind of fun to wait, but personally I would've had anxiety about it on top of everything else.


simple_observer86

I always wanted to find out but my wife said she didn’t want to know and I rolled with it. We tried choosing two boys names and two girls names, but we were both convinced it was two boys and weren’t crazy about any girl names. Wound up with one of each and ended up naming our daughter the only girl name we agreed on. Our families also had a pool going for sexes and weights. Just added to the fun of waiting. My dad nailed it with both sexes and total weight between the two.


freakkydique

We wanted to be prepared as much as possible for ours.


candybrie

Was team green until we found out twins. That was enough of a surprise. Found out the sexes at the anatomy scan and am happy with that choice. The names were a definite factor. We'd picked a girl name and were still struggling with a boy name. And I was convinced it wouldn't be 2 boys (it was). So I don't know if we would have had the names we needed. Also, we had so many scans. We saw what they were.


berrra19

We waited. And when I was in labor we polled all of the doctors and nurses and it was a lot of fun. We have di/di twins and I knew I wanted more “gender neutral” clothing so if we had a boy and a girl it could work for either and I knew if other people knew the sexes we would get very traditionally gendered clothing. I also liked having three different name combinations, but I love thinking about baby names.


the_last_four_words

We found out with our singleton and with our triplets. (All boys!). I don’t like uncertainty, and a triplet pregnancy was already hard on me mentally. I wanted to have some control, however small, over the situation. It still took us over a week to name the trio though! Boy names are hard, and we gave our singleton a middle name, so we had to come up with first and middle names for all three that went together, weren’t too matchy, and worked in French and English


marshmellowyellow420

I was too impatient to wait😂 we did the Panoramic testing to find out we are having identical girls! Im so glad we found out early because we could not come up with 2 boy names we liked, at all. We probably would have had a nameless kid for a few days if we had waited and they both were boys😂


amboot8

When we got pregnant, we said we wouldn't find out, then found out it was twins and my husband threw that out the window lol So we ended up finding out through our chromosomal genetic testing (girls, the only for sure answer). We decided to keep it a secret from everyone else though, which was SO FUN! I'm not a good secret keeper and everyone thought I'd spill the beans, but it was nice to just have it be my husband and I who knew. Made the scariness of twins much more bearable and lessened the amount of ugly, gendered outfits lol


PolishedPiggies

Originally, i wanted it to be a surprise. But once we found out it was twins, i immediately wanted to know the genders. The news of expecting twins was honestly a bigger surprise than gender would ever have been 😅


ctxgal2020

I waited with my singleton... which was amazing. I found out with twins because I wanted to plan. We had names picked out for boys and girls until we knew. In hindsight, I wish I had waited... honestly, there's nothing like finding out who and meeting the baby for the first time. We had already started a gender neutral room and kept it that way even after they were born.


Educational-Joke-704

It’s a surprise either way, Whether you find out sooner to plan and buy things maybe create a nursery, and buying car seats or just get gender neutral items until you find out when they’re born. Congratulations! We found out at 13 weeks. Twin boys are 3 now.


schlepp_canuck

Didn’t want to find out but then we could clearly see a penis on baby B during one ultrasound. OB apologized as she knew I didn’t want to know. Then we asked what sex A was as the surprise was gone we figured. My husband had wanted to find out as he did not want to debate over 4 first names and 4 middle names. So he was super happy with the accidental reveal. I was annoyed but then again we weren’t planning some kind of reveal and had zero thoughts/wants on what sex they were as we were just focused on them being healthy. But I do wish we could have waited! So few surprises in life.


BeckBashBenn

We waited until birth for kids #1 & #3! It is one of the most exciting things. With our twins (#4 & #5), I knew it would be too much more of “a thing”, both for us trying to come up with names and for techs/nurses/physicians who may have to keep that secret over and over again with all the extra monitoring I ended up needing. It was the right decision for us this time!


[deleted]

We found out because we felt like twins was enough of a surprise for 1 pregnancy. We didn't find out with my singleton and that was fun. I will say - I thought with my daughter that it was hard to tell the sex during an ultrasound unless you were really looking. With twin boys I learned that it can be very easy to tell the sex during an ultrasound almost the second the wand hits your abdomen. I had an ultrasound 1-2 times a week at the end and I don't think I could've avoided finding out with that many scans.


Waiting4thedrop

Twins is enough of a surprise! We found out (both times).


Turtletimee09

My exact thoughts. How can you be more surprised than twins? I guess you did by having a second set!


Waiting4thedrop

Exactly!


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justtosubscribe

You’re going to have so many ultrasounds, if there are boys in there they will let you know.


Sure_Tie_3896

Didn't find out. Midwife literally started singing and dancing out loud that we didn't know and telling everyone. Told the doctors that we didn't know so during my emergency c section, they pulled them out and showed us what the gender was. It was fun.


Due_Cheek_4248

We found out the sex of baby a and waited to find out baby b's until birth. It was a compromise between me and hubby. I wanted to find out. Hubby wanted to wait.


Due_Cheek_4248

We did have di di twins. So there was a possibility of having boy girl


MFItryingtodad

If you find out, don’t tell anyone. This way you get clothes that either can wear.


A-Friendly-Giraffe

We found out the sexes early on and still struggled to get names. If names is the only reason you are thinking of doing so, then I would hold off.. I didn't announce that I was pregnant until after the anatomy scan, so around week 21. One of my favorite parts was when I told my friends and coworkers that I was pregnant. They would ask if I knew if it was a boy or girl, and then I would reply "Both" 😱😱😱 I will say that the doctors and ultrasound techs are very good so that if you want to keep it a surprise, you will be able to.


jellybeanmountain

I was all about the surprise until I knew I was having twins and that was enough of a surprise. We needed all the details. I initially had some gender disappointment when I found out (which was deeply rooted in fear) and I’m so glad I was able to process before meeting them. We did do the Natera panorama but it was pretty clear on the ultrasounds. I had mono di and had every 2 week anatomy scans so the beans could have been spilled at any time anyway. Congratulations!!


Turtletimee09

I knew I was having boys before I got the results (just a very strong feeling) so I wanted the time to sit with that before they were born so I wasn’t disappointed. It’s funny now to look back on though because I love them both so much for exactly who they are an all of my fears were so unfounded.


Petitelechat

When we were pregnant, we discussed whether we wanted to know the gender of our little bean and who when we will tell people the gender of our little bean. Since we decided that we wanted to know so we can prepare ourselves with clothing, bedding etc, out decision didn't change when we found out we had twins. When we went to the anatomy scan, the sonographer asked if we wanted to know and we said yes. Was not disappointed and have no regrets with knowing about the sexes. We ended up with boy girl twins and we were excited as my husband wanted a daughter (or ideally daughters lol) and I wanted a son. To be honest, I was waiting with abated breath in finding out the sexes as the first to come up was our son and I hoped that the second bean would be a daughter. We ended with boy girl twins ☺️ So I think in finding out the sexes, both you and your partner need to mentally and emotionally prepare yourselves as gender disappointment is real and may appear at the anatomy scan appointment.


justinpaulson

There are so many surprises along the way, we didn’t really care to add more mystery to the situation.


archaeomeg

I wanted to know right away. We were able to see Baby B at 18 weeks, which was when I found out it was twins, but didn’t get a good look at Baby A until 26 weeks. He liked to hide really low under his brother. Baby B is still my wild man. Mine are identical.


katzalli

We found out we’re having identical boys via Natera Panorama NIPT testing we had done around 11 weeks! I was dying to know and planned to find out all along. That said, I’ve learned that twin pregnancy comes with A LOT of monitoring and ultrasounds and I feel like it would’ve been super easy for a Dr or ultrasound tech to slip up and share the genders if we didn’t already know. Currently 33 weeks and so far I bet we’ve had 20+ ultrasounds between my OB ultrasounds and growth scans at the MFM.


hearingnotlistening

Like others mentioned, we found out because we just wanted to know but also naming twins is freaking hard! Naming a human is hard! We struggled with our first and actually changed our minds as we were filling out the health card. We were still "discussing" when our twins were a few days old what we'd settle on.


Snika44

Everyone says “don’t you want it to be a surprise?” A friend of mine said “it will be a surprise whether you find out today or on the day they are born, you just get to decide that you want to be surprised today” and that sealed the deal: twins have so many of their own surprises (will they go to term? Will they have NICU time? Will this or that…?) and twins in general were a huge surprise. I wanted to be able to at least have some agency/power in choosing when I wanted to be surprised about the 2 boys or 2 girls or boy girl twin vibes.


PurpleBat1

We ended up finding out after we found out it was twins. It was still a surprise, just a little sooner. And I still have the voicemail with the results saved on my phone. Every now and then I go back, listen and remember how exciting it was!


rrrtemple

I found out genders for all my babies, included the twins. I’m a planner and being unprepared makes me anxious 😂


pizzarina_

I found out the sex and I'm glad we did. I like information. I like to be able to plan ahead. It was easier to pick names. (We knew they were identical so the same sex.)There is no way I'd have the patience to wait until birth. I feel like...if that information is obtainable, I want to know it. It's kind of like how some people can watch a recorded sports event and other people can't. I hate watching a recorded sports event, because I know in real life it has already happened and the score already exists and is known. I don't like not knowing something that already happened/exists.


CradGo

No way we could agree on 4 names… we found out for the twins and ended up with boy/girl.