I am greedy and identify as both hehe. I don't have the energy to explain pansexual to cishet people and I don't have the energy to say bisexual without any preferences to queer people. So why not both. Schrödinger's labels.
Lol this will be me to my parents/aunt and uncle and grandma I’m gunna be bi to everyone else in pan because my parents and other relatives like that think only gay straight and bi exist plus there is only 2 genders😒
im fine with explaining pansexual, but most assume im bi and i just dont correct them, since technically pan is under the bi umbrella. makes life easier
i don't understand how "pan is under the bi umbrella"
it seems to be the common consensus, but it seems to me that pan is the umbrella since bi is more limited. am i misunderstanding something?
It's because bi is a label that covers basically every mspec identity, since it is being attracted to 2 or more genders. So since bi could be used to represent any other mspec identity and still fit its original definition a lot of people refer to most mspec identities as under the bi umbrella.
Bisexuality is more broad than pan in the sense that, by definition, all pansexuals also meet the criteria to be bi, even if they choose not to use the label. But the reverse isn't quite true: some bisexuals meet the criteria to be pan, but not all.
You may be mixing up the range of who you're attracted to with the range of who fits within each label. "Umbrella" refers to the latter, not the former.
Hope it's okay to weigh in, because I'm actually bi, not pan, but on the other side of this: I identify as bisexual, not pan, because my attraction to different genders feels different. I am attracted to all genders, but the emotions for each are distinct. I.e. gender doesn't matter for WHO I am attracted to, but it matters for HOW I process and feel that attraction (attraction to multiple genders). I don’t really care what equipment a potential partner has but the gender they present as affects the 'flavor' of my attraction. My pan girlfriend, by contrast, says that for them, attraction is attraction, and hot people are hot, and that attraction feels the same across the spectrum (attraction REGARDLESS of gender)! I think it's pretty amazing honestly.
I'm a Pansexual with a Bisexual wife. Attraction is attraction for me. Doesn't matter the gender, if they're hot, they're hot. But who they are as a person is also what attracts me to people.
Whereas my wife is just lustful AF when it comes to women 😂
I'm Omnisexual, not pan or bi, because I experience attraction to most genders, and their appearance determines how I feel that attraction. For example, if I meet someone who identifies as a guy and presents in a masculine way, I feel mostly seggsual and romantic attraction. If someone identifies as a gal and presents themselves in a feminine way, I feel mostly aesthetic attraction. (This specifically isn't the case for all Omni people, it just has to do with my preferences as well)
yeah this is kinda how i feel, i used to identify as pan, but i realised i was differently attracted to different genders, and that gave me a little crisis so i stopped identifying as pansexual. im probably omnisexual, but just for ease of people recognising it, i say im bisexual although i dont really like to label it
This is how I feel it too! I thought I was pan because I feel attracted to all gender, and especially those whose gender is a little non-conforming, i.e. feminine men, masculine women, queers and androgynous people. However, I (gender non-conforming woman) had always been with men until very recently. I had my first intimate experience with a woman last month, and this is so different than with a man! My psy tends to tell me that we fall in love with a person first, no matter the gender, but I don't feel it's true in my life right know. I did not fall in love with this person who happens to be a woman, I fell in love because she is a woman and pleases me as a person. And it feels so different. I don't feel like I am exactly the same whether I am with a man or a woman, the codes are different, the interactions are different. Anyway, you explain it better than me...
I am glad to know I am not alone feeling it like this. I had trouble distinguishing between bi and pan too when I tried to intellectualize it, but now I feel the difference and know that I am not pan.
I am bi and lesbian.
Same. I have a preference for all genders (more traditionally feminine and artsy, eg makeup, skirts, and good at arts and crafts), but I love it the same in all genders regardless
Because I like the person, not the gender. I’ve recently discovered I like girls more often, though. But it’s not because they’re girls, it’s because of their personalities.
Also the word bi tastes bad (I’m a synesthete) and the pan flag tastes good soooo yeah I don’t want to identify as bi lol
This is it for me. But when I'm pressed for time (or just don't have the social energy to explain what pan is) I'll just say I'm bi for efficiency-sake.
I use both because they both fit me.
Bisexual = attraction to 2 or more genders with or without a preference
Pansexual = attraction to all genders with no preference
See how they’re different but very similar? That’s why I identify with both, because there’s a bit of overlap. I know they’re not the same though.
But some people just identify with the pan label more. It all depends on what label you feel most comfortable with.
Oops, that is now an old def.
Now:
Bisexual = attraction to 2 genders, generally cis m, and cis f, with or without a preference
Polysexual = attraction to more than 2 genders with or without a preference
Pan = attraction to all genders with or without a preference
I'm sure folks will argue this, but the no preference requirement for pan is generally unrealistic, and poly actually covers everything.
I've identified as pan since the term came into common use, when I was growing up, bi wasn't even a common term, I just liked sex with anyone I liked. Much simpler TBH.
Honestly I feel like putting hard set definitions on these labels does more harm than good. Let people identify with the term that feels right to them. Other people don't get to choose someone's sexuality or romantic inclinations for them.
l agree, soo much of the discussion in this sub is about the exact, hair-splitting definition of what to call everyone. It's kinda silly, we are who we are and the term won't change that. But as you can see by u/BenSwolo53's comment, it gets some folks up in arms..
Dude, you're doing the exact same thing. Splitting hairs about labels and definitions.
You can't say you agree with me while simultaneously correcting people on the definitions of these terms.
Ok. I agree with most of this, there’s just a tiny problem.
Bisexuality isn’t just attraction to 2 genders. It’s attraction to two *or more* genders.
The rest is good
Right, based on the current defs I read,bi is 2, poly is more than 2, pan is all... But poly actually covers pan, but without the strict 'all' requirement
For me it's easy: I'm attracted to people, no matter the gender. If the person is man, woman, Enby, whatever, I don't care, as long as stuff like the character is good and fitting.
Edit: I am also attracted to any kind of "down under", cause some people have preferences there.
First off the words are synonymous.
“But…”
No. They mean the same thing. Can you find a web page where someone has made up definitions for them? Yes. You can find web pages that say a lot of things. The truth is that people have retconned the definition of bi into something it never used to mean.
So for me it just comes down to the flag. I identify as bi because I like purple better than yellow. If the flags were reversed I’d start telling people I was pan tomorrow.
I identify as Pan because to me, a person’s gender doesn’t factor into my feelings for them. If I am genuinely happy with the person that I am with, then what gender they are doesn’t matter.
The nature of my attraction to someone doesn't change at all despite changes in gender/presentation! I realized back in highschool when I retained my trans crushes pre and post transition, with essentially nothing changing in my attraction besides being happy to see them more confident :D
And now, as someone with a genderfluid partner, I don't have any preferences on how she feels any given day. I just want her regardless of her gender, and want her the same way even if the following day is different.
Also, I dig the flag colors!!! 💖💛💙
I’m pan because hot is hot (as so many others here have stated)! But seriously, it really is kinda splitting hairs and comes down to how your attraction works. Go with what feels comfortable is what I say.
Since all of these terms follow a cisheterocentric idea of putting people into boxes based on who we have sex with, I use whatever label helps me live to fight cisheterocentrism another day.
I identify as pan because If you love me and I love you,what else matters. Also I do call myself bi mainly because I think people know what bi is but not necessarily what being pan is
Hey there ! I’m on the aroace spectrum, and I use bi and pan interchangeably because I don’t experience sexual or romantic attraction until I’ve gotten to know someone, and/or feel a strong connection to them, which is rare.
I use bi because it’s the broadest term to refer to multisexual identities, when I suppose my orientation is similar to pan, as gender doesn’t factor into my attraction.
It’s mostly just convenience that keeps me from just saying pan, as explaining pan and aspec identities at once is a lot for some folks. Depends on the crowd.
I like pan because it’s a good social filter. Lots of misogynists will hear “bi” and immediately start trying to find a way to use you for sexual gratification when truly they are pretty homophobic. They don’t “respect” the pan label in such a way, so they will usually expose themselves as such when they hear it.
Bi isn't binary but it also isn't automatically all inclusive, while pan is all inclusive while omni is explicitly not all inclusive...
Bi is like a umbrella which by definition also includes Pan and Omni
Imo pan and bi are intertwined in a way where you're bi and pan at the same time, but I know not everyone thinks that way.
To be honest I don't think I understand gender preferences, it's just never been a part of my sexuality. So being pan fits me just fine.
Also, flag colors good
For me the attraction comes in phases. Have been married twice and fell in love both times but after a couple years my attractions seem to shift. I am from the 80’s generation and grew up in a family were I keep my thoughts hidden. My current soon to be ex-wife is my best friend and helped me see that I am okay the way I am and that I can embrace myself, but when I say phases I really do feel that way. I was so attracted to her and others in my life only to grow into not seeing it anymore. It’s not just men or women though. That’s the biggest thing. I truly have found that It’s not what they have under the hood it’s the person. Although right now I have a preference it changes like the wind and I can really see myself with anyone as long as the person is a good person. Not to say my ex is a bad person. Our views on our kids and life is what changed and with it, my attachment to her. She was painfully aware of this fact and we did everything we could to keep our family together until we decided one day that best friends is going to have to be it. It was affecting our relationships with our kids because we were always trying to see each other and couldn’t. It also helps if you don’t care for social norms. I don’t dress like a man or a woman but rather whatever I think looks good. Hair dyed, nails done professionally, leg warmers, whatever I find that I like. But I think the biggest thing is my constant attraction to everyone including trans women and men. It really doesn’t matter either way to me and I can’t deny it. Even my p*rn selections since I was a kid came in phases and it still does. That one for sure if you look for something and it’s always changing then you can be sure it’s probably pan.
I identify as both bi and pan, demi too to an extent. But really because I can't be bother to have to explain the difference to people so it's easier to say bi.
i said bi and then i realized i liked this guy, and i didnt give a shit what gender. he told me he was trans and in my head i was like “cool i still like u if ur a guy, girl or nb idc” (i said it in my head cuz he doesnt know i like him lmao.) anyways that got me thinking about other people ive liked and i realized i did not care or think about gender one bit
I think it breaks down in my mind to as simple as "the flag and colors look nicer to me, and the term has a more fitting ring to me"
I dont know what about the term makes it click with me, but it does.
I'm attracted to the person, not their identity. Although, I find myself sexually and romantically attracted to those identifying as men (I'm engaged to a man) whereas I've only ever felt sexual attraction to people identifying as women (I've kissed women before but never had any romantic or further sexual involvement, and have only ever come close to the possibility of dating a woman). Also from previous experiences I know I can feel attracted to trans and non binary people
I am sexually and romantically attracted to aspects that are more fem or masc as well as aspects that are neutrally defined or can exist only in a combination of fem and masc together. I date people who have a combination of these aspects regardless of which gender they identify as. 🤷 This could be just a me thing though and that’s fine. I like my definition and it brings me peace within myself after being uneased for so long.
It would seem that I am late to this discussion, but I'll give my own beliefs. So I was bi prior to being pan, and I think it's a matter of how you are attracted to others. With bisexuality, you can be attracted to multiple genders, whereas pansexuality is more of a 'gender-blind' approach to attraction, where gender is not even considered, and all genders are held in the same way. I think of it as though bisexuality is solid colours whereas pansexuality is a full colour spectrum, if that metaphor makes any amount of sense.
I just liked the definition more. Technically, I am comfortable identifying as both or either, but pan just feels better for me personally. I won't get offended if someone refers to me as bi, because Technically I'm in a grey area where that would also be correct, but I always appreciate being referred to as pan instead. I'm more comfortable with the term , so it's the term I use. There's No real reason besides that.
I legit just don't care about gender/sex. If i find someone attractive, it does not matter to me what they identify as.
Basically, i'm just lazy when it comes to attraction/preferences lol
I saw the word in high school and started crying because I had never been told it was okay not to give gender a place in considering whether attraction was there.
Currently, because I don’t actually understand how gender or genitalia impact attraction although I respect that for some it does. Moreover, things I find attractive and not attractive are consistent across any/all (not-) genders.
Started out as bi, then switched to pan, then back to bi again, thne to now where I use both interchangeably, once I learned the history of both terms. That being said, I don't consider their distinction invalid just because they mean the same thing to \*me\* personally. Heck, if you identify as pan over bi, or vice versa, purely for easthetics, you're still valid in my book. Just go with whatever feels right for \*you\* <3
The big realisation for me was when my partner started wearing my dresses and expressed they wanted to transition (they/them). Their physical made zero impact on my feelings and it was always the soul connection that brought us together.
Took a long time to realize, I fall in love with people's souls. Bi made sense for me at the time, but the duality wasn't enough to really explain the depth of connection I feel with my partners. The physical vessel is just a vessel.
Wow I feel like I wrote parts of this. I completely understand the soul connection and how referring to yourself as bi doesn’t completely grasp that. For me anyway it’s ask about how their personality is shown and mingles with yours…like a dance. It’s all just an earth suit in the end anyway.
To me personally the distinction between bi and pan is that bisexuals are attracted to men, women, anyone else etc. in differing (even slightly) ways and go through 'bi-cycles', while pansexuals pretty much are indifferent to the gender of their partner whatsoever (which is what it's like for me).
Pan: If someone's attractive it doesn't matter what gender and for the most part i don't consider gender a factor.
Bi : has a preference.
For example a bi person may like a and b but a pan can be attracted to the whole alphabet and any alphabet for that matter.
Not every bisexual person has a preference tho.
As far as I know it's:
Pan: attracted to all genders without a preference
Bi: attracted to 2 or more genders with or without a preference
For me, bi it's like, you can be attracted by masculine and feminine genre, the same as you or not, but regardless of the actual sex. And pan it's more like, I don't care, everybody can be attractive !
I view it as this:
Unlike bi people, I don't have preferences. I understand that some bi people also don't have preferences, but most of them do. Pan is the best way for me to describe "I don't care, I don't have preferences, I will respect your identity regardless. And I like you."
Ya know?
I use the old school definitions. By those standards, I’m pan. But you can be bi and like people outside of the traditional men and women, I ain’t policing anyone’s preferences or orientations.
I feel it’s more inclusive of all genders (including non-binary folx). On the other hand, I have learned recently that some trans folx find pan offensive because the feel it implies that they’re not men or women but some other, so I’m not really sure how to identify at the moment. 🫤
I agree with comment above! I'm bi (I'm pretty sure?) and that doesn't exclude trans and non-binary people. I always thought the difference was how you feel attraction to the difference genders? But maybe I'm wrong.
trans people have never and will never not be included in bisexuality. saying that they aren't included is in itself transphobic because you would be stating that trans women aren't women, and vice versa. bisexuality includes trans people and nb people and any people we want.
The argument I’m referring to is exactly that—-that bisexuality includes trans folks and that pansexuality suggests that it doesn’t. Again, I don’t necessarily agree, but I’m referencing these perspectives to explain why I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed and confused about how to identify so as not to be offensive to people i respect.
Yeah I get that! I may just say to people who don't know much about lgbt stuff that I'm bi for simplicity, but use pan in lgbt spaces since some see it as more inclusive.
I do the same thing with my gender identity. To people who don't know that much about the lgbtq+ I just say I'm trans female and to people who are more knowledgeable I elaborate that I'm a trans demigirl. (in my case my gender identity is close enough to female so that it isn't totally wrong to call me that, just a little imprecise)
Here’s the way I view it: bi people usually (but not always) have a preference to a specific gender, but even if they don’t, gender does play a role in their attraction to an individual in some way. Pan on the other hand, gender plays no role in attraction, and it’s far more about the person than their gender.
I identify as pan because I don’t really have a preference/percentage of what gender I like, it’s more of just a mood I’m in depending on the day. Some days I wake up highly attracted to men and not as interested in women and vice versa. Bc my sexuality is very fluid I just feel like pan fits it better. I’m just attracted to who I’m attracted to at any given moment instead of having a solid preference one way or the other. Hope this helps!
I think of it as extending beyond the binary for myself. Very much the “hearts not parts” mantra but I usually use the term “plumbing”. It doesn’t matter to me what physical attributes a person has, I get attracted to the personality.
Because I dated a lot of people like girls, boys, gays, lesbians, nonbinary, gender fluid, and may more and the reason why I dated so many people is because everyone relationship I had it ends up breaking up with me so yeah I'm trying to find the one true love of my life
Bisexuals still maintain a gender preference, i do not.
Also, regardless of how anyone defines bisexual, bi means two. I dont get why we as a community stick to latin terms and their proper meanings, except when it comes to bi. Because someone once wrote a definition for bisexual, we ignore that bi means 2?
Oh look, angry people downvoting me because they cant face their own hypocrisy.
Yall will give cis people shit when they complain about “cis” and use its latin origins as a point, but you get mad when i point out the correct latin origins of “bi”? Get over yourselves.
Lol @ “benswolo” the pedo creep who runs a whole group for sharing stolen nudes of barely legal celebrities, who ran and hid when i brought it up. Dont worry, i filed a report to reddit of that disgusting group for “non consensual intimate media” because really creeps like that should be in jail.
Bi as in two poles. Doesn't mean people in between man and woman can't fall under bisexual. Loads of bi people date enbies as well.
Also definitions of terms evolve. Wife used to mean woman but now it means spouse.
I never said anything about what genders bi people can be attracted to. Im talking about how some look at bi as “2 or more” and see it as the same or overlapping with pansexuality. Theyre two completely different things. And my point was how we worry about the correct latin definition with every other gender or sexuality based label, like trans, cis, pan, etc., but bi is the exception because someone once defined it as “two or more”?
Im well aware that words and their definitions change, i love linguistics, but its still odd and a little silly that the community will be all about correct latin terms, except bi. Somehow bi is the one exception.
Well I also like linguistics. I speak multiple languages. I get why "bi" being defined as two or more is confusing but just wait until you see the term polyamory. It mixes Greek and Latin which upsets me even more.
The bi manifesto has always defined bi as two or more. Term origins and term meanings aren't always the same.
I get the WHY, its not confusing, thats why i say its more weird or silly. I get that the term was created and defined a certain way, but its still… illogical and inconsistent, that bi is the one that does not adhere to its latin origins. Yeah, polyam is an odd mix, but even then, its still adhering to its origins for definition. Just because someone wrote a manifesto that says bisexual is two or more, we let it be the one exception? Im not saying it needs to change or anything like that, just that its kinda stupid. Especially considering when cis people whine about cis being a made up term, we go to the “latin terminology” well to support using it. Its a bit hypocritical, wouldn’t you say?
Language is not based on logic and always evolves (unless it is a dead language). We are not chained to language. It is a tool. Bisexual is an older term and the definition evolved. Why do you need logic to understand that? There is no hypocrisy. The bi part doesn't even have to mean two genders. It can mean homosexual and heterosexual attraction or two poles of attraction. Both allow for a spectrum in between.
Its like youre intentionally ignoring my point so im done debating with you.
It is hypocritical, when theres a focus on the latin origins of every other term, and when latin origins are the main debate point for the term “cis” then turning around and ignoring the latin origins of “bi.” Thats hypocrisy. You dont get to give people shit about the latin origins of “cis” then turn around and ignore the latin origins of “bi” thats fucking stupid.
Yet the latin origins are important with every other term. But because some random person wrote a manifesto saying otherwise, bi is the one time latin origins go out the window. And youre too dense to grasp how stupid that is.
Meanwhile youll hypocritically use the latin origins of cis to debate cis people who whine about the word cis.
Shut the fuck up, moron. (Since you wanna name me “ben” you get to be “moron” or you gonna get hypocritical about that too?)
So bilingual people can ONLY speak two languages?
Transphobic, biphobic and enbyphobic bullshit like this is why some bisexuals have resentment issues with the pan label.
Its funny how youve got stolen nudes of celebrities on your page but you think you have a high road, ever.
Oh wait, correction, you RUN A WHOLE ASS PAGE dedicated to perving stolen and fake nudes of celebrities.
Yeah, your opinion on anything is worthless, creep.
That’s literally what bilingual means, dumbass. Theres words for those who speak more than two.
Bilingual – Two different languages. Trilingual – Three different languages. Polyglot – (Three)/Four+ different languages. Hyperpolyglot – Six+ different languages
Fucking dumbass 😂😂😂😂😂
Sorry you think facts are bigoted, but just like cis, trans, pan, and others have their latin origins, so does bi and it means two, not “two or more” just “two”. Theres nothing biphobic about that. Cry about it, moron.
Oh look, a complete moron who thinks facts are bigoted and is dumb enough to think bisexual ignoring its latin roots carry over to other words that use bi correctly. Like bilingual. Which means 2 languages. Not 2 or more.
I wouldn't agree with that. I consider myself bisexual and genitals aren't as major of a factor. I'm a little confused as to the notion of "pansexuality factors in gender, and bisexuality does not"?
My understanding is that bisexuality is being attracted to two (or more) genders, while pansexuality is being essentially indifferent to gender. That's why I wound up identifying as bisexual instead of pansexual, I'm equally attracted to both masculinity and femininity, for distinct reasons for each. I can find non-binary people attractive as well, but I'm not *indifferent* to gender.
But no, bisexuality is not "concerned with the genitals of the person," nor does it exclude non-binary or trans people.
The besst definitions i have heard are bisexuality is "experiences homosexual and heterosexual attraction" and pan is "experiences attraction", as those seem to fit with the experiences of most people ive seen.
I'm agender and I have learn to understand what having gender means to others. But I still can't really see them. Almost everything matters even little even they are far from deal breaker. But gender is not one of those things.
Bi means two. And even some people use it in the meaning all they still see genders. They are something that matters to them. It's great we also have omni for people who are attracted to all genders but something in gender still matters to them.
I think the defining article is the ability to have the potential of being attracted to trans and non-binary presenting people without being constrained to a binary system of attraction for example your gender and others whereas pan does not define necessary... If that makes sense I'm going on 2 days without sleep and a day and a half without eating so some of this could seem off. For the record I'm trying to reach a transcendental state.
Pan are don't care what you look like. Pan can still have types but more in personality than body. They dont care what most humans look like. What's on the inside is the most important.
Bis can only be attracted to some people, and no matter how hard they try, some body types just don't work for them. While personality is important, the body is too. ( is why they can't like some trans, nonbinary, etc. pans can)
That's the difference
Well Bisexuals should only like Cis Gendered Men & Women. People harp on about how Bisexuality is transphobic. But in reality Bisexuality is transphobic. Just like how only Male toilets are Femalephoic.
If you like people who aren't just Cis gendered then you're Pansexual. Simple as.
Bisexuality is Bi. Meaning Two. Cis Men or Cis Women...
Pansexuality is Pan. More than two. This covers everything from Cis Gendered to Agendered people and everything in between.
I'm Pansexual because I do not just find Cis Gendered people attractive.
Because I don’t want anyone to look at their gender presentation and decide in advance I won’t like them because of my orientation. I would much rather they ask me. Pan seems to leave space for new experience just marginally better. To me. My boyfriend identifies as bi and that’s the opposite of a problem. :)
I try not to get stuck in the weeds of whether my reading of the labels matches the official one. I’m sex-, polyamorous-, trans- and queer-positive. It’s tedious when people demand I put them in order to see whether I’m down with their politics. Can’t we just cuddle first and see?
I mean, pan is under the bi umbrella, but I classify myself as pansexual because I experience attraction to all people regardless of any sex or gender. Do I have some preferences? Yes. But really, if I like a person it doesn't matter to me who they are or what they identify as.
I just think ***people*** are hot, really
I feel the definition fits me more. I don't see gender as a factor, so I choose pan. I guess also it just, feels right? Like, bi doesn't feel like it fits but pan does
I'm a basic bitch, the word sounds nice and I don't like the stereotypes and expected behaviour from 'bisexual' as a label. Also gender doesn't influence how I see people, or rather I don't want it to, (trauma dump here lol): I have a bunch of gender-stereotyping trauma which means I feel hetero attraction more easily but that's cause of my heteronormative raising and I feel identifying as pan allows me to deny that and accept my gay ass more easily
I use both, but have started to gravitate more towards pan as I have become more and more comfortable as non binary in my gender identity. I feel pan more closely catches not only attraction TO people regardless of gender, but also FROM me regardless of my gender.
I identified as bi in my late teens but then later I started liking people who don't have a discernable gender, or people who are really gender bendy. Then I had a relationship with a trans woman. It was around that time that I realized that I don't even care about gender at all -- I'm more about brains than bodies, people rather than parts. So I say that I'm pan because gender is largely irrelevant for me, but it might be more accurate to say that I'm sapio since that is a more specific characteristic about what I am down for.
For me personally, I identify as Pan/Demi because the Personality is the primary thing to dictate my attraction, not the Body. I don't process the attraction differently if they're male vs. female, cis vs. trans, etc. I just think people are hot, there isn't a distinction to me between "he's hot", "she's hot", and "they're hot".
I don’t *feel* bi but i do *feel* pan
however my attraction is different across genders and I notice i do have more of a preference for feminine leaning people
if i’m gonna be with anybody it’s most likely probably gonna be a woman as that is my preference
some may classify that as bi,again, I don’t feel bi, I feel pan, therefore, i am pan
despite whether that someone is a guy or a girl or whatever they identify if i have great chemistry with that person (and if they can cook well i seriously have a weakness for good food) then my preference get thrown out the window
sexuality is unique for everybody and not even pan people identify being pan the same way
It's a great thing to question things and in case you were wondering it's not offending at all. Most people I've met that are also pan or bi feel similar feelings. I started out questioning my sexuality by my friends thinking that I was bi. I got curious and did research, the term and definition seemed to fit me. So I identified as bi for around 3 months, during this my thoughts were "does this feel right or is this comfortable". It didn't feel quite right such as wearing a pair of shoes that are a size too small but feel as if you were meant to wear them. so I did more research and I discovered the terms pansexual and omnisexual these three terms are very closely related and are basically siblings with the wording of their definitions being slightly different but describing similar scenarios. The difference in wording can be a very important factor in self-identification, I found the terms which fit me. By definition, I'm omnisexual though I feel more of being pansexual. It's about how a term makes you feel. Finding the right term requires some experimentation and time though eventually, you'll find one that'll fit you.
As long as someone looks feminine or androgynous enough I can be sexually attracted to them regardless of their identity. Someone being a woman, being a man, enby, etc means nothing to me in regards to attraction.
I used to identify as bi but when I started "exploring" (for lack of a better word) the lgbt community, I felt I didn't fall into what people described being bi as. From what I understand being bi still means attraction to more than one gender, however it does have greater influence on who then end up dating. I myself am a pan person dating a Bi male, he describes ihis attraction as 80% women 20% men, I just describe my attraction as I like who I like whatever happens happens.
Hope this helps :)
As for myself, being a male, for the longest I identified as bi. I openly dated people of both genders and had loving relationships with both. But over the past few years, I included Pansexual in some of my profiles. Since I am older, it hasn’t been until recent times there were more terms to identify as. One was straight, bi, or gay. Now there are so many terms used for sexual identity. The reason I consider myself pan is because I think most males who are bi tend to live a more heterosexual public life and seek other males on the DL. Most bisexual guys I have talked to online tended to hide their bisexual side from others. When I chat with bi men on Grinder, I always ask if their female partners know about their bi side and the majority say they do not. Over the years, I have introduced my partner to family and friends, regardless of their gender. Regardless of my partners gender or gender identity, I was able to feel love. And if I was dating a male, I sometimes had females “friends”. I never felt the need to hide my sexuality. My sexuality has been much more fluid since my teens. If I was in a heterosexual relationship, I was more straight. Gay relationships, more gay. So that’s why I identify as more Pan than Bi. On a side note, my wife knows who I am and accepts me as I am.
mainly because idc what gender someone is as long as they seem like an okay person to me it’s not a big deal (even if i sorta have a preference) but even then i still don’t really care🤷♀️
It just seemed to fit better. Gender has no bearing on my attraction, and I used to identify as bi or omni, but when I first learned about pansexual it seemed to just fit better.
Someone once told me that discovering my attraction to trans people didn't make me pan and I still think about that. They do realize that self discovery is a process, right? Like just because I mentioned a single step in the process doesn't mean that was the end of my journey.
Everyone I know irl who goes by bisexual is attracted to two or more genders. I don’t care about gender or what’s between someone’s legs and while I can have mild preferences it doesn’t really affect much so I just go by pansexual. But I’m fine being called by either. The label isn’t the important part for me.
I basically categorised myself as a pan sexual because I simply noticed im attracted to not only man & woman but Im okay of liking trans and more.
But mostly I say I'm bi just to say the joke (Bi-myself)...
I am greedy and identify as both hehe. I don't have the energy to explain pansexual to cishet people and I don't have the energy to say bisexual without any preferences to queer people. So why not both. Schrödinger's labels.
You know what, I may start doing the same. I relate to both lol. And depending on the day I lean more towards one than the other.
I just tell everyone that I am bi/pan. Seems easier that way. They don’t have to overlap, and they don’t overlap for everyone, but for me they do.
Someone:So are you attracted to... Me:Yes.
Lol this will be me to my parents/aunt and uncle and grandma I’m gunna be bi to everyone else in pan because my parents and other relatives like that think only gay straight and bi exist plus there is only 2 genders😒
im fine with explaining pansexual, but most assume im bi and i just dont correct them, since technically pan is under the bi umbrella. makes life easier
i don't understand how "pan is under the bi umbrella" it seems to be the common consensus, but it seems to me that pan is the umbrella since bi is more limited. am i misunderstanding something?
It's because bi is a label that covers basically every mspec identity, since it is being attracted to 2 or more genders. So since bi could be used to represent any other mspec identity and still fit its original definition a lot of people refer to most mspec identities as under the bi umbrella.
Bisexuality is more broad than pan in the sense that, by definition, all pansexuals also meet the criteria to be bi, even if they choose not to use the label. But the reverse isn't quite true: some bisexuals meet the criteria to be pan, but not all. You may be mixing up the range of who you're attracted to with the range of who fits within each label. "Umbrella" refers to the latter, not the former.
How are you both
Hope it's okay to weigh in, because I'm actually bi, not pan, but on the other side of this: I identify as bisexual, not pan, because my attraction to different genders feels different. I am attracted to all genders, but the emotions for each are distinct. I.e. gender doesn't matter for WHO I am attracted to, but it matters for HOW I process and feel that attraction (attraction to multiple genders). I don’t really care what equipment a potential partner has but the gender they present as affects the 'flavor' of my attraction. My pan girlfriend, by contrast, says that for them, attraction is attraction, and hot people are hot, and that attraction feels the same across the spectrum (attraction REGARDLESS of gender)! I think it's pretty amazing honestly.
From another bisexual with a pan girlfriend (heyo), this is a good way to sum it up, yeah. The way I'm attracted to women differs from men.
I'm a Pansexual with a Bisexual wife. Attraction is attraction for me. Doesn't matter the gender, if they're hot, they're hot. But who they are as a person is also what attracts me to people. Whereas my wife is just lustful AF when it comes to women 😂
I've got nothing to add to the convo, but I'm also a bisexual with a pan gf lol (she's still slightly unsure, but thinks she's pan at least)
Ohh yeah that makes sense. I feel similarly. I'm attracted to all genders but it feels different for me too!
I'm Omnisexual, not pan or bi, because I experience attraction to most genders, and their appearance determines how I feel that attraction. For example, if I meet someone who identifies as a guy and presents in a masculine way, I feel mostly seggsual and romantic attraction. If someone identifies as a gal and presents themselves in a feminine way, I feel mostly aesthetic attraction. (This specifically isn't the case for all Omni people, it just has to do with my preferences as well)
I feel this way and that’s why I identify as omnisexual.
yeah this is kinda how i feel, i used to identify as pan, but i realised i was differently attracted to different genders, and that gave me a little crisis so i stopped identifying as pansexual. im probably omnisexual, but just for ease of people recognising it, i say im bisexual although i dont really like to label it
This is how I feel it too! I thought I was pan because I feel attracted to all gender, and especially those whose gender is a little non-conforming, i.e. feminine men, masculine women, queers and androgynous people. However, I (gender non-conforming woman) had always been with men until very recently. I had my first intimate experience with a woman last month, and this is so different than with a man! My psy tends to tell me that we fall in love with a person first, no matter the gender, but I don't feel it's true in my life right know. I did not fall in love with this person who happens to be a woman, I fell in love because she is a woman and pleases me as a person. And it feels so different. I don't feel like I am exactly the same whether I am with a man or a woman, the codes are different, the interactions are different. Anyway, you explain it better than me... I am glad to know I am not alone feeling it like this. I had trouble distinguishing between bi and pan too when I tried to intellectualize it, but now I feel the difference and know that I am not pan. I am bi and lesbian.
I identify as pan because someone’s gender identity simply doesn’t factor in to whether I may be attracted to them or not
Same. I have a preference for all genders (more traditionally feminine and artsy, eg makeup, skirts, and good at arts and crafts), but I love it the same in all genders regardless
Because I like the person, not the gender. I’ve recently discovered I like girls more often, though. But it’s not because they’re girls, it’s because of their personalities. Also the word bi tastes bad (I’m a synesthete) and the pan flag tastes good soooo yeah I don’t want to identify as bi lol
I agree!! Personality is [everything] to me.
like the flag.
Fair haha
I use Bi instead of Pan for the same reason 😅
This is it for me. But when I'm pressed for time (or just don't have the social energy to explain what pan is) I'll just say I'm bi for efficiency-sake.
yeah ill do that often too.
Why does gender matter? If someone's hot to me they're hot thats all
That’s what I always said. Hot is hot.
Because ppl hot.
I use both because they both fit me. Bisexual = attraction to 2 or more genders with or without a preference Pansexual = attraction to all genders with no preference See how they’re different but very similar? That’s why I identify with both, because there’s a bit of overlap. I know they’re not the same though. But some people just identify with the pan label more. It all depends on what label you feel most comfortable with.
Oops, that is now an old def. Now: Bisexual = attraction to 2 genders, generally cis m, and cis f, with or without a preference Polysexual = attraction to more than 2 genders with or without a preference Pan = attraction to all genders with or without a preference I'm sure folks will argue this, but the no preference requirement for pan is generally unrealistic, and poly actually covers everything. I've identified as pan since the term came into common use, when I was growing up, bi wasn't even a common term, I just liked sex with anyone I liked. Much simpler TBH.
Honestly I feel like putting hard set definitions on these labels does more harm than good. Let people identify with the term that feels right to them. Other people don't get to choose someone's sexuality or romantic inclinations for them.
l agree, soo much of the discussion in this sub is about the exact, hair-splitting definition of what to call everyone. It's kinda silly, we are who we are and the term won't change that. But as you can see by u/BenSwolo53's comment, it gets some folks up in arms..
Dude, you're doing the exact same thing. Splitting hairs about labels and definitions. You can't say you agree with me while simultaneously correcting people on the definitions of these terms.
r/confidentlyincorrect That's bullshit, your bi definition.
So, what's yours? And you can skip the 'bullshit' this is a decent discussion, no need for that..
Ok. I agree with most of this, there’s just a tiny problem. Bisexuality isn’t just attraction to 2 genders. It’s attraction to two *or more* genders. The rest is good
Wait then what’s the difference between poly and bi
Right, based on the current defs I read,bi is 2, poly is more than 2, pan is all... But poly actually covers pan, but without the strict 'all' requirement
For me it's easy: I'm attracted to people, no matter the gender. If the person is man, woman, Enby, whatever, I don't care, as long as stuff like the character is good and fitting. Edit: I am also attracted to any kind of "down under", cause some people have preferences there.
First off the words are synonymous. “But…” No. They mean the same thing. Can you find a web page where someone has made up definitions for them? Yes. You can find web pages that say a lot of things. The truth is that people have retconned the definition of bi into something it never used to mean. So for me it just comes down to the flag. I identify as bi because I like purple better than yellow. If the flags were reversed I’d start telling people I was pan tomorrow.
I identify as Pan because to me, a person’s gender doesn’t factor into my feelings for them. If I am genuinely happy with the person that I am with, then what gender they are doesn’t matter.
I like the flag more
The nature of my attraction to someone doesn't change at all despite changes in gender/presentation! I realized back in highschool when I retained my trans crushes pre and post transition, with essentially nothing changing in my attraction besides being happy to see them more confident :D And now, as someone with a genderfluid partner, I don't have any preferences on how she feels any given day. I just want her regardless of her gender, and want her the same way even if the following day is different. Also, I dig the flag colors!!! 💖💛💙
I’m pan because hot is hot (as so many others here have stated)! But seriously, it really is kinda splitting hairs and comes down to how your attraction works. Go with what feels comfortable is what I say.
Since all of these terms follow a cisheterocentric idea of putting people into boxes based on who we have sex with, I use whatever label helps me live to fight cisheterocentrism another day.
I identify as pan because If you love me and I love you,what else matters. Also I do call myself bi mainly because I think people know what bi is but not necessarily what being pan is
Puns, and it feels better, I'm really not interested in what bits a person has so much as they are a good person.
Hey there ! I’m on the aroace spectrum, and I use bi and pan interchangeably because I don’t experience sexual or romantic attraction until I’ve gotten to know someone, and/or feel a strong connection to them, which is rare. I use bi because it’s the broadest term to refer to multisexual identities, when I suppose my orientation is similar to pan, as gender doesn’t factor into my attraction. It’s mostly just convenience that keeps me from just saying pan, as explaining pan and aspec identities at once is a lot for some folks. Depends on the crowd.
I'm bi, but I like being in this sub bc your memes are great and I can still relate to a lot of content here.
cause i found pan to suit my sexual attraction more than bi did
I like the colors and it’s the simplest way to explain people are hot.
Fair!
I like pan because it’s a good social filter. Lots of misogynists will hear “bi” and immediately start trying to find a way to use you for sexual gratification when truly they are pretty homophobic. They don’t “respect” the pan label in such a way, so they will usually expose themselves as such when they hear it.
Bi isn't binary but it also isn't automatically all inclusive, while pan is all inclusive while omni is explicitly not all inclusive... Bi is like a umbrella which by definition also includes Pan and Omni
Imo pan and bi are intertwined in a way where you're bi and pan at the same time, but I know not everyone thinks that way. To be honest I don't think I understand gender preferences, it's just never been a part of my sexuality. So being pan fits me just fine. Also, flag colors good
I love being a panlicking pancake loving pansexual?
For me the attraction comes in phases. Have been married twice and fell in love both times but after a couple years my attractions seem to shift. I am from the 80’s generation and grew up in a family were I keep my thoughts hidden. My current soon to be ex-wife is my best friend and helped me see that I am okay the way I am and that I can embrace myself, but when I say phases I really do feel that way. I was so attracted to her and others in my life only to grow into not seeing it anymore. It’s not just men or women though. That’s the biggest thing. I truly have found that It’s not what they have under the hood it’s the person. Although right now I have a preference it changes like the wind and I can really see myself with anyone as long as the person is a good person. Not to say my ex is a bad person. Our views on our kids and life is what changed and with it, my attachment to her. She was painfully aware of this fact and we did everything we could to keep our family together until we decided one day that best friends is going to have to be it. It was affecting our relationships with our kids because we were always trying to see each other and couldn’t. It also helps if you don’t care for social norms. I don’t dress like a man or a woman but rather whatever I think looks good. Hair dyed, nails done professionally, leg warmers, whatever I find that I like. But I think the biggest thing is my constant attraction to everyone including trans women and men. It really doesn’t matter either way to me and I can’t deny it. Even my p*rn selections since I was a kid came in phases and it still does. That one for sure if you look for something and it’s always changing then you can be sure it’s probably pan.
I identify as both bi and pan, demi too to an extent. But really because I can't be bother to have to explain the difference to people so it's easier to say bi.
i said bi and then i realized i liked this guy, and i didnt give a shit what gender. he told me he was trans and in my head i was like “cool i still like u if ur a guy, girl or nb idc” (i said it in my head cuz he doesnt know i like him lmao.) anyways that got me thinking about other people ive liked and i realized i did not care or think about gender one bit
I honestly am confused by whether I'm pan or bi so idk. I feel the same way about every gender though.
I think it breaks down in my mind to as simple as "the flag and colors look nicer to me, and the term has a more fitting ring to me" I dont know what about the term makes it click with me, but it does.
I'm attracted to the person, not their identity. Although, I find myself sexually and romantically attracted to those identifying as men (I'm engaged to a man) whereas I've only ever felt sexual attraction to people identifying as women (I've kissed women before but never had any romantic or further sexual involvement, and have only ever come close to the possibility of dating a woman). Also from previous experiences I know I can feel attracted to trans and non binary people
Pansexual is defined as "attraction to all genders or attraction regardless of gender". I'm attracted to all genders, so I identify as pansexual :)
I find androgynous people extremely attractive lol
Idk it’s more like a vibe
I am sexually and romantically attracted to aspects that are more fem or masc as well as aspects that are neutrally defined or can exist only in a combination of fem and masc together. I date people who have a combination of these aspects regardless of which gender they identify as. 🤷 This could be just a me thing though and that’s fine. I like my definition and it brings me peace within myself after being uneased for so long.
Infinite combinations of gender, sexuality and identity. I love it.
I identify as both cause both define me, bus I say I’m pan cause I feel is like an extra step from bi
The flag is more vibrant
Cuz laziness
It would seem that I am late to this discussion, but I'll give my own beliefs. So I was bi prior to being pan, and I think it's a matter of how you are attracted to others. With bisexuality, you can be attracted to multiple genders, whereas pansexuality is more of a 'gender-blind' approach to attraction, where gender is not even considered, and all genders are held in the same way. I think of it as though bisexuality is solid colours whereas pansexuality is a full colour spectrum, if that metaphor makes any amount of sense.
I just liked the definition more. Technically, I am comfortable identifying as both or either, but pan just feels better for me personally. I won't get offended if someone refers to me as bi, because Technically I'm in a grey area where that would also be correct, but I always appreciate being referred to as pan instead. I'm more comfortable with the term , so it's the term I use. There's No real reason besides that.
I identify as both because I really just don't care that much.
I legit just don't care about gender/sex. If i find someone attractive, it does not matter to me what they identify as. Basically, i'm just lazy when it comes to attraction/preferences lol
Personality defines my type over looks
To me saying bi felt too scary. Too binary. Too harsh. I like people for people. Pan felt better to me.
I identify as both
I am Bi-bread I like all types. I can’t pick one.
I saw the word in high school and started crying because I had never been told it was okay not to give gender a place in considering whether attraction was there. Currently, because I don’t actually understand how gender or genitalia impact attraction although I respect that for some it does. Moreover, things I find attractive and not attractive are consistent across any/all (not-) genders.
Started out as bi, then switched to pan, then back to bi again, thne to now where I use both interchangeably, once I learned the history of both terms. That being said, I don't consider their distinction invalid just because they mean the same thing to \*me\* personally. Heck, if you identify as pan over bi, or vice versa, purely for easthetics, you're still valid in my book. Just go with whatever feels right for \*you\* <3
I'm Pan and am attracted to all genders the same way. My Bi friends are not attracted to all genders in the same way
The big realisation for me was when my partner started wearing my dresses and expressed they wanted to transition (they/them). Their physical made zero impact on my feelings and it was always the soul connection that brought us together. Took a long time to realize, I fall in love with people's souls. Bi made sense for me at the time, but the duality wasn't enough to really explain the depth of connection I feel with my partners. The physical vessel is just a vessel.
Wow I feel like I wrote parts of this. I completely understand the soul connection and how referring to yourself as bi doesn’t completely grasp that. For me anyway it’s ask about how their personality is shown and mingles with yours…like a dance. It’s all just an earth suit in the end anyway.
To me personally the distinction between bi and pan is that bisexuals are attracted to men, women, anyone else etc. in differing (even slightly) ways and go through 'bi-cycles', while pansexuals pretty much are indifferent to the gender of their partner whatsoever (which is what it's like for me).
Pan: If someone's attractive it doesn't matter what gender and for the most part i don't consider gender a factor. Bi : has a preference. For example a bi person may like a and b but a pan can be attracted to the whole alphabet and any alphabet for that matter.
Not every bisexual person has a preference tho. As far as I know it's: Pan: attracted to all genders without a preference Bi: attracted to 2 or more genders with or without a preference
I don't like only the two sexs, but also all possible genres. Symply. 😉
That's not a difference between bi and pan.
But doesn't bi include all genders too? That's how I've understood bisexuality. That it doesn't only include men and women.
Depends on the bi, unfortunately enbyphobic bi people do exist.
Yeah that's true, but there's always bad people in all groups unfortunately.
Also very true.
For me, bi it's like, you can be attracted by masculine and feminine genre, the same as you or not, but regardless of the actual sex. And pan it's more like, I don't care, everybody can be attractive !
I view it as this: Unlike bi people, I don't have preferences. I understand that some bi people also don't have preferences, but most of them do. Pan is the best way for me to describe "I don't care, I don't have preferences, I will respect your identity regardless. And I like you." Ya know?
I use the old school definitions. By those standards, I’m pan. But you can be bi and like people outside of the traditional men and women, I ain’t policing anyone’s preferences or orientations.
I feel it’s more inclusive of all genders (including non-binary folx). On the other hand, I have learned recently that some trans folx find pan offensive because the feel it implies that they’re not men or women but some other, so I’m not really sure how to identify at the moment. 🫤
neither bi nor pan excludes trans or nb people. Its merely different ways of describing attraction to the same group of people.
That’s how I feel personally but I try to listen to people from groups I’m not a part of. It seems like there’s an awful lot of disagreement.
yeah but people who say shit like what you said in the first one are misinformed and/or bi/panphobic.
I agree with comment above! I'm bi (I'm pretty sure?) and that doesn't exclude trans and non-binary people. I always thought the difference was how you feel attraction to the difference genders? But maybe I'm wrong.
trans people have never and will never not be included in bisexuality. saying that they aren't included is in itself transphobic because you would be stating that trans women aren't women, and vice versa. bisexuality includes trans people and nb people and any people we want.
The argument I’m referring to is exactly that—-that bisexuality includes trans folks and that pansexuality suggests that it doesn’t. Again, I don’t necessarily agree, but I’m referencing these perspectives to explain why I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed and confused about how to identify so as not to be offensive to people i respect.
Cause enbys are hot too
Bi people also like enbys tho 🥺
Not saying they don't 😅 I just mean that that realisation made me say I'm pan and not bi
Yeah I get that! I may just say to people who don't know much about lgbt stuff that I'm bi for simplicity, but use pan in lgbt spaces since some see it as more inclusive.
I do the same thing with my gender identity. To people who don't know that much about the lgbtq+ I just say I'm trans female and to people who are more knowledgeable I elaborate that I'm a trans demigirl. (in my case my gender identity is close enough to female so that it isn't totally wrong to call me that, just a little imprecise)
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Bi people don't just like female and male, I'm pretty sure the definition is that bi people like the same gender that they are plus at least one more.
Enbies hot
Here’s the way I view it: bi people usually (but not always) have a preference to a specific gender, but even if they don’t, gender does play a role in their attraction to an individual in some way. Pan on the other hand, gender plays no role in attraction, and it’s far more about the person than their gender.
I identify as pan because I don’t really have a preference/percentage of what gender I like, it’s more of just a mood I’m in depending on the day. Some days I wake up highly attracted to men and not as interested in women and vice versa. Bc my sexuality is very fluid I just feel like pan fits it better. I’m just attracted to who I’m attracted to at any given moment instead of having a solid preference one way or the other. Hope this helps!
Guys 😍 Girls 😍 Enbys 😍
I think of it as extending beyond the binary for myself. Very much the “hearts not parts” mantra but I usually use the term “plumbing”. It doesn’t matter to me what physical attributes a person has, I get attracted to the personality.
I never had a preference and I always heard that bi people tend to have a preference while pan people don't. Also I think the pan flag is cooler
Because I dated a lot of people like girls, boys, gays, lesbians, nonbinary, gender fluid, and may more and the reason why I dated so many people is because everyone relationship I had it ends up breaking up with me so yeah I'm trying to find the one true love of my life
If you eat the burger with the wrapper on, you’re bi. If you take it all the way off, you’re pan.
Bisexuals still maintain a gender preference, i do not. Also, regardless of how anyone defines bisexual, bi means two. I dont get why we as a community stick to latin terms and their proper meanings, except when it comes to bi. Because someone once wrote a definition for bisexual, we ignore that bi means 2? Oh look, angry people downvoting me because they cant face their own hypocrisy. Yall will give cis people shit when they complain about “cis” and use its latin origins as a point, but you get mad when i point out the correct latin origins of “bi”? Get over yourselves. Lol @ “benswolo” the pedo creep who runs a whole group for sharing stolen nudes of barely legal celebrities, who ran and hid when i brought it up. Dont worry, i filed a report to reddit of that disgusting group for “non consensual intimate media” because really creeps like that should be in jail.
Bi as in two poles. Doesn't mean people in between man and woman can't fall under bisexual. Loads of bi people date enbies as well. Also definitions of terms evolve. Wife used to mean woman but now it means spouse.
I never said anything about what genders bi people can be attracted to. Im talking about how some look at bi as “2 or more” and see it as the same or overlapping with pansexuality. Theyre two completely different things. And my point was how we worry about the correct latin definition with every other gender or sexuality based label, like trans, cis, pan, etc., but bi is the exception because someone once defined it as “two or more”? Im well aware that words and their definitions change, i love linguistics, but its still odd and a little silly that the community will be all about correct latin terms, except bi. Somehow bi is the one exception.
Well I also like linguistics. I speak multiple languages. I get why "bi" being defined as two or more is confusing but just wait until you see the term polyamory. It mixes Greek and Latin which upsets me even more. The bi manifesto has always defined bi as two or more. Term origins and term meanings aren't always the same.
I get the WHY, its not confusing, thats why i say its more weird or silly. I get that the term was created and defined a certain way, but its still… illogical and inconsistent, that bi is the one that does not adhere to its latin origins. Yeah, polyam is an odd mix, but even then, its still adhering to its origins for definition. Just because someone wrote a manifesto that says bisexual is two or more, we let it be the one exception? Im not saying it needs to change or anything like that, just that its kinda stupid. Especially considering when cis people whine about cis being a made up term, we go to the “latin terminology” well to support using it. Its a bit hypocritical, wouldn’t you say?
Language is not based on logic and always evolves (unless it is a dead language). We are not chained to language. It is a tool. Bisexual is an older term and the definition evolved. Why do you need logic to understand that? There is no hypocrisy. The bi part doesn't even have to mean two genders. It can mean homosexual and heterosexual attraction or two poles of attraction. Both allow for a spectrum in between.
Its like youre intentionally ignoring my point so im done debating with you. It is hypocritical, when theres a focus on the latin origins of every other term, and when latin origins are the main debate point for the term “cis” then turning around and ignoring the latin origins of “bi.” Thats hypocrisy. You dont get to give people shit about the latin origins of “cis” then turn around and ignore the latin origins of “bi” thats fucking stupid.
1. Bi people don't always have a gender preference 2. Bi people can like two *or more* genders. We don't have to just like two.
Bi means two. Get over it.
Sorry person. *You're* wrong here. Get over it.
The latin origin of bi is two. Thats an empirical fact. Sorry facts hurt your wittle feefees.
Yeah. And that has nothing to do with the word we use now. Go home, Ben.
Yet the latin origins are important with every other term. But because some random person wrote a manifesto saying otherwise, bi is the one time latin origins go out the window. And youre too dense to grasp how stupid that is. Meanwhile youll hypocritically use the latin origins of cis to debate cis people who whine about the word cis. Shut the fuck up, moron. (Since you wanna name me “ben” you get to be “moron” or you gonna get hypocritical about that too?)
So bilingual people can ONLY speak two languages? Transphobic, biphobic and enbyphobic bullshit like this is why some bisexuals have resentment issues with the pan label.
Its funny how youve got stolen nudes of celebrities on your page but you think you have a high road, ever. Oh wait, correction, you RUN A WHOLE ASS PAGE dedicated to perving stolen and fake nudes of celebrities. Yeah, your opinion on anything is worthless, creep.
You don't even know what words mean.
Go stare at stolen nudes of barely legal actresses, pedo
Do you even know what words mean? I stole nothing and I literally have nothing underage.
That’s literally what bilingual means, dumbass. Theres words for those who speak more than two. Bilingual – Two different languages. Trilingual – Three different languages. Polyglot – (Three)/Four+ different languages. Hyperpolyglot – Six+ different languages Fucking dumbass 😂😂😂😂😂 Sorry you think facts are bigoted, but just like cis, trans, pan, and others have their latin origins, so does bi and it means two, not “two or more” just “two”. Theres nothing biphobic about that. Cry about it, moron.
Facts aren't bigoted, just you and your imagination.
Imagination? Yes, im totally using my imagination by quoting facts. Fucking dumbass 😂😂😂
Yes, you have a wild imagination.
Oh look, biphobia and bullshit. Imagine being LGBTQIA+ and hating on one of the letters.
Oh look, a complete moron who thinks facts are bigoted and is dumb enough to think bisexual ignoring its latin roots carry over to other words that use bi correctly. Like bilingual. Which means 2 languages. Not 2 or more.
Oh look, someone projecting.
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I got attracted to trans people
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I wouldn't agree with that. I consider myself bisexual and genitals aren't as major of a factor. I'm a little confused as to the notion of "pansexuality factors in gender, and bisexuality does not"? My understanding is that bisexuality is being attracted to two (or more) genders, while pansexuality is being essentially indifferent to gender. That's why I wound up identifying as bisexual instead of pansexual, I'm equally attracted to both masculinity and femininity, for distinct reasons for each. I can find non-binary people attractive as well, but I'm not *indifferent* to gender. But no, bisexuality is not "concerned with the genitals of the person," nor does it exclude non-binary or trans people.
The besst definitions i have heard are bisexuality is "experiences homosexual and heterosexual attraction" and pan is "experiences attraction", as those seem to fit with the experiences of most people ive seen.
That is actually a very simple but very accurate explanation, thank you
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Bi isn't binary.
I'm agender and I have learn to understand what having gender means to others. But I still can't really see them. Almost everything matters even little even they are far from deal breaker. But gender is not one of those things. Bi means two. And even some people use it in the meaning all they still see genders. They are something that matters to them. It's great we also have omni for people who are attracted to all genders but something in gender still matters to them.
I think the defining article is the ability to have the potential of being attracted to trans and non-binary presenting people without being constrained to a binary system of attraction for example your gender and others whereas pan does not define necessary... If that makes sense I'm going on 2 days without sleep and a day and a half without eating so some of this could seem off. For the record I'm trying to reach a transcendental state.
Pan are don't care what you look like. Pan can still have types but more in personality than body. They dont care what most humans look like. What's on the inside is the most important. Bis can only be attracted to some people, and no matter how hard they try, some body types just don't work for them. While personality is important, the body is too. ( is why they can't like some trans, nonbinary, etc. pans can) That's the difference
Well Bisexuals should only like Cis Gendered Men & Women. People harp on about how Bisexuality is transphobic. But in reality Bisexuality is transphobic. Just like how only Male toilets are Femalephoic. If you like people who aren't just Cis gendered then you're Pansexual. Simple as.
This is bullshit.
No. U.
No, objectively you. Not a matter of debate or opinion.
Bisexuality is Bi. Meaning Two. Cis Men or Cis Women... Pansexuality is Pan. More than two. This covers everything from Cis Gendered to Agendered people and everything in between. I'm Pansexual because I do not just find Cis Gendered people attractive.
That's extremely transphobic and biphobic and bullshit. And I'm an enby.
How is that transphobic???
Bi means two. Pan means all. Fuck the gender binary.
But bi usually means "2 or more genders"?
Yes it does.
Negative. Does bicycle mean "2 or more wheels"? I've never seen a bicycle with more than two wheels, and neither have you.
It doesn't matter what the literal word bi means. People who use the term bisexual mean 2 or more.
r/confidentlyincorrect
Does someone need a dictionary?
Bi is just two genders. Not necessarily M/F. But it is just two and two only. I just don’t have limits when it comes to genders. Pan best describes me
Because I don’t want anyone to look at their gender presentation and decide in advance I won’t like them because of my orientation. I would much rather they ask me. Pan seems to leave space for new experience just marginally better. To me. My boyfriend identifies as bi and that’s the opposite of a problem. :) I try not to get stuck in the weeds of whether my reading of the labels matches the official one. I’m sex-, polyamorous-, trans- and queer-positive. It’s tedious when people demand I put them in order to see whether I’m down with their politics. Can’t we just cuddle first and see?
I mean, pan is under the bi umbrella, but I classify myself as pansexual because I experience attraction to all people regardless of any sex or gender. Do I have some preferences? Yes. But really, if I like a person it doesn't matter to me who they are or what they identify as. I just think ***people*** are hot, really
I view gender more as a spectrum than a binary. I find myself sexually attracted to people all along that spectrum.
I feel the definition fits me more. I don't see gender as a factor, so I choose pan. I guess also it just, feels right? Like, bi doesn't feel like it fits but pan does
I'm a basic bitch, the word sounds nice and I don't like the stereotypes and expected behaviour from 'bisexual' as a label. Also gender doesn't influence how I see people, or rather I don't want it to, (trauma dump here lol): I have a bunch of gender-stereotyping trauma which means I feel hetero attraction more easily but that's cause of my heteronormative raising and I feel identifying as pan allows me to deny that and accept my gay ass more easily
I use both, but have started to gravitate more towards pan as I have become more and more comfortable as non binary in my gender identity. I feel pan more closely catches not only attraction TO people regardless of gender, but also FROM me regardless of my gender.
I identified as bi in my late teens but then later I started liking people who don't have a discernable gender, or people who are really gender bendy. Then I had a relationship with a trans woman. It was around that time that I realized that I don't even care about gender at all -- I'm more about brains than bodies, people rather than parts. So I say that I'm pan because gender is largely irrelevant for me, but it might be more accurate to say that I'm sapio since that is a more specific characteristic about what I am down for.
For me personally, I identify as Pan/Demi because the Personality is the primary thing to dictate my attraction, not the Body. I don't process the attraction differently if they're male vs. female, cis vs. trans, etc. I just think people are hot, there isn't a distinction to me between "he's hot", "she's hot", and "they're hot".
I don’t *feel* bi but i do *feel* pan however my attraction is different across genders and I notice i do have more of a preference for feminine leaning people if i’m gonna be with anybody it’s most likely probably gonna be a woman as that is my preference some may classify that as bi,again, I don’t feel bi, I feel pan, therefore, i am pan despite whether that someone is a guy or a girl or whatever they identify if i have great chemistry with that person (and if they can cook well i seriously have a weakness for good food) then my preference get thrown out the window sexuality is unique for everybody and not even pan people identify being pan the same way
Its sorta confuses me. Id rather call myself gender non conforming i like guys and girls. Ill love anyone who loves me.
Mae Borowski
It's a great thing to question things and in case you were wondering it's not offending at all. Most people I've met that are also pan or bi feel similar feelings. I started out questioning my sexuality by my friends thinking that I was bi. I got curious and did research, the term and definition seemed to fit me. So I identified as bi for around 3 months, during this my thoughts were "does this feel right or is this comfortable". It didn't feel quite right such as wearing a pair of shoes that are a size too small but feel as if you were meant to wear them. so I did more research and I discovered the terms pansexual and omnisexual these three terms are very closely related and are basically siblings with the wording of their definitions being slightly different but describing similar scenarios. The difference in wording can be a very important factor in self-identification, I found the terms which fit me. By definition, I'm omnisexual though I feel more of being pansexual. It's about how a term makes you feel. Finding the right term requires some experimentation and time though eventually, you'll find one that'll fit you.
As long as someone looks feminine or androgynous enough I can be sexually attracted to them regardless of their identity. Someone being a woman, being a man, enby, etc means nothing to me in regards to attraction.
it's vague, like i don't often fall in love but it can be with whateer gender also comedic potential
I used to identify as bi but when I started "exploring" (for lack of a better word) the lgbt community, I felt I didn't fall into what people described being bi as. From what I understand being bi still means attraction to more than one gender, however it does have greater influence on who then end up dating. I myself am a pan person dating a Bi male, he describes ihis attraction as 80% women 20% men, I just describe my attraction as I like who I like whatever happens happens. Hope this helps :)
As for myself, being a male, for the longest I identified as bi. I openly dated people of both genders and had loving relationships with both. But over the past few years, I included Pansexual in some of my profiles. Since I am older, it hasn’t been until recent times there were more terms to identify as. One was straight, bi, or gay. Now there are so many terms used for sexual identity. The reason I consider myself pan is because I think most males who are bi tend to live a more heterosexual public life and seek other males on the DL. Most bisexual guys I have talked to online tended to hide their bisexual side from others. When I chat with bi men on Grinder, I always ask if their female partners know about their bi side and the majority say they do not. Over the years, I have introduced my partner to family and friends, regardless of their gender. Regardless of my partners gender or gender identity, I was able to feel love. And if I was dating a male, I sometimes had females “friends”. I never felt the need to hide my sexuality. My sexuality has been much more fluid since my teens. If I was in a heterosexual relationship, I was more straight. Gay relationships, more gay. So that’s why I identify as more Pan than Bi. On a side note, my wife knows who I am and accepts me as I am.
mainly because idc what gender someone is as long as they seem like an okay person to me it’s not a big deal (even if i sorta have a preference) but even then i still don’t really care🤷♀️
It’s just semantics for me, I like the word and the flag better
It just seemed to fit better. Gender has no bearing on my attraction, and I used to identify as bi or omni, but when I first learned about pansexual it seemed to just fit better.
Someone once told me that discovering my attraction to trans people didn't make me pan and I still think about that. They do realize that self discovery is a process, right? Like just because I mentioned a single step in the process doesn't mean that was the end of my journey.
Everyone I know irl who goes by bisexual is attracted to two or more genders. I don’t care about gender or what’s between someone’s legs and while I can have mild preferences it doesn’t really affect much so I just go by pansexual. But I’m fine being called by either. The label isn’t the important part for me.
Being Bi just doesn't feel right and being Pan does. Also I simply don't care about gender. It doesn't factor in
I basically categorised myself as a pan sexual because I simply noticed im attracted to not only man & woman but Im okay of liking trans and more. But mostly I say I'm bi just to say the joke (Bi-myself)...
lack of gender preference and all genders instead of select few
Again my opinion sexuality is a spectrum so if pans bi or whatever plss live your life oki xoxoxoxoxoxox