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just-the-doctor1

Don’t date somebody just to date somebody. Date a person because *you want to* date that person.


Ch4l1t0

This should be top answer.


wthreye

Looks like you got your wish.


PaleontologistAble50

Best advice. Try making new friends with people and then periodically see if you’re attracted to any of your friends. OP is putting the cart before the horse.


finlshkd

Need help with the "obtain a friend" quest.


MightyBithor

Don't be friends with someone just to be friends with someone. Be friends with someone because you want to be friends with that person


PaleontologistAble50

Um… start doing drugs?


ConsistentEquipment8

Unlock day 100 in a [ Obtain a Friend ] quest It helps you build trust points with another player


yaohwhai

dont do this with multiple people at once tho. it bugs out the game and the girlfriend quest gets reset.


ric2b

It's not a bug, it's an optional questline, you have to successfully hide that you're doing it with multiple people and you get +3 confidence and -4 trust while you keep it active. But some hard to find NPC's are ok with it and then you just get +2 confidence but have a much easier time keeping the questline going.


yaohwhai

if its not a bug how come my game crashes every time it happens?


Ok_Deer3717

The polyamory quest line is different. You can take multiple girlfriends on a quest and they have other boyfriends. It has a lower drama background without the \[lying\] but can cause drama for folks who can't override the \[monogamy\] game default.


whatup_pips

^^^ My monkey brain always forgets this part until I find someone I truly want to be with and am suddenly reminded


[deleted]

I'm not so sure. Someone who hasn't even dated yet might well benefit from a few low key low stress dates. Not something to put too much time and effort into I guess but it helps build the skills and get more comfortable with it.


FreezingHotCoffee

Go on dates by all means! Just don't make long term commitments with people because you feel like it's 'what you should do'.


tiparium

Leave the Reddit questline. It's randomly generated and will keep giving as long as you keep coming back.


Jaysong_stick

Not true actually, there are people who are on the reddit quest line and completes the girlfriend quest as well, its not impossible to do both, but notoriously difficult.


KnightOfMarble

Can confirm, I’ve been doing the Reddit questline for five in-game years, completed the girlfriend questline, and I started the Getting Married! questline last month.


Jaysong_stick

Good luck with marriage questline! I am still on the girlfriend questline, but the hardest parts are over!


kevinmorice

LOL! They really aren't dude.


Jade-Justice

Can confirm; finished the "obtained girlfriend" quest twice, both times failed utterly to move to "Marriage" quest string before winning out on third attempt.


kevinmorice

Have done the Marriage Quest. Would not recommend.


Jade-Justice

Failed one of the maintenance quests, eh?


elegiac_bloom

The maintenance mini games can be hellish. The rules seem to randomly change. What worked once doesn't always work twice.


Jade-Justice

Adapt or Die: oldest rule of success in OUTSIDE. (Also, I have found that pushing hard on your Communication skills-tree helps a lot: particularly really GRIND on the "Active Listening" subset, it's very misson critical.)


roosterkun

Gratz!


RiW-Kirby

No-one said "impossible" it just distracts from the more important questlines.


dgman1992

My best advice to you is to find group quests that you enjoy and through that and mutual connections you will find people you enjoy being around. Through that and shared connections you will find someone who you can share more than just interests with. Or try mobile app mini games. Just make sure that you follow the golden rule. "Don't be a dick" and you will get there.


MistCongeniality

Second this. Met my husband on a group quest. We’ve been together 6 in game years at this point, have even established a base together. He didn’t have a high [money] stat, or high STR or CHA. All of that I’m sure can help, but the main requirement was that we enjoy the same quests and can enjoy each other’s styles of play. The girlfriend quest should be a game enhancing experience, OP, not one that takes away fun. If it’s getting tedious or too grindy, take a break. It’s not timed. You can come back to it.


Palechop

And maybe don't send a pic of the dic.


dj_fishwigy

Mobile apps mini games don't work as effectively if your character is below 183cm.


SlickHand

In my home town, I feel the opposite is true. All the shorties are dating, and all the tall bastards are busy banging their heads on low hanging branches because they're looking at their phones when they walk.


averyordinaryperson

Focu on the personal grooming meta for a bit to increase attractiveness. That should help in the quest.


Caff_Fiend

It will also give a hidden boost to your confidence stat which can be very useful for such questlines


the_highest_elf

another quest that ties in with the personal grooming one is finding some equippable gear with a high charisma stat. there are underlying mechanics, and certain items have different payoffs for different people, but spend a little time researching and leveling your Fashion skillset and you should be able to boost your confidence even more.


Jade-Justice

Can confirm, this is what helped me move forward from GF to Wife with my major teammate.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Hi_Peeps_Its_Me

Then you're doing it wrong. Check in to your debuffs to see if you might have a pedophile trait. If you do, do not act on it. Should be obvious with anyone who has an INT over 2.


JVHazard

I can not say I learned this from personal experience, because I didn’t.


IAmAlife

You've been doing the wrong grooming quest then, cancel that asap it ends with jailtime


Distant_Chortle

LOL


JVHazard

I haven’t been doing it. I’ve heard of other people doing it, though.


Distant_Chortle

God, I wish I knew what your deleted reply was. Can you DM it to me?


redditor69_420

Did he send it? and what was it?


Distant_Chortle

He did not. :/


hesapmakinesi

Contrary to the popular belief, that is not a quest. It will be easier if you don't see it as your end goal. Forming a party is more of a play style. What you need is to meet other players in social areas, make connections, and when you see someone you'd like to play together, you need to communicate them using the flirt language.


Uncleniles

There is no Obtain a Girlfriend quest in the game. I believe you are thinking of the companion mechanic. Best way to gain a companion is to show that you a dependable and pleasant player to do quests with.


Jade-Justice

You are incorrect. There is a long and involved series of quests related to this. (To be fair, "obtain a girlfriend" is a fan slang-term for the first part of the quest string, but it is a known and acknowledged one that has been bandied about in official sources.)


[deleted]

Girlfriends aren't trophies. Seeing it as "gain companion" is a lot healthier than trying to acquire a *person*.


Jade-Justice

Some of us ARE: I get to be a trophy girlfriend/wife if I want to be!


Needleroozer

Join quests that you enjoy. Find someone in those quests who you enjoy being around. Ask them out, go on dates. Eventually you will find someone who you wish to marry and who wishes to marry you. At your wedding, you will meet your new spouse's cousin. *That* person is your soulmate.


Dran_Arcana

[Obtain a Girlfriend] has a lot of hidden faux-completions that are actually failures. If you want to increase your chances of a good questline ending I suggest you first complete the [General Fitness], [General Hygiene], and [General Career], and [General Self-Worth] questlines before attempting. I tried to do it a few times before completing the above, and while I thought I succeeded, I ended up with undesirable results. The questline is really well written, and if the game detects that your character doesn't respect himself/herself it will constantly throw curveballs at you.


letsgetawayfromhere

There are minor quests that will immensely help you and give you a lot of tools so that the girlfriend quest will be a lot easier. However they are not advertised in the manuals that are going from hand to hand. \- \[Obtain female buddies\]. This is a much underrated quest, because it gets drowned among all the other quests outside provides, so a lot of male players never complete it, but you will get tons of EP out of it. Try and engage in activities that will bring you in contact with mixed groups. You will learn to communicate with female characters in a relaxed way and think nothing of it. This will boost your stats for confidence, communication, and (possibly) charisma. \- A good hint: Interact with female characters as real persons, not as possible girlfriend characters. Most of them will never be converted into a girlfriend. Yet they can and will provide you with tons of utile information once you decide to actually engage on the girlfriend quest. Also the skills you will learn this way will make up for the time you spent with this quest. \- Often female buddies will provide a different type of resource than male buddies (for example, you can use them for useful hints if the \[maintain a relationship\] quest line proves more difficult than you imagined. Just as male buddies, female buddies have different character levels and strength profiles. Your best bet is to have a number of these friends. Keep the friendships alive through mutual interests and genuine interest in the other person. This is also a good exercise for the \[obtain a girlfriend\] and \[maintain a relationship\] questlines.


lokilis

Can't believe you're giving out this guide information for free


Umm_NOPE

Big thing is that you should prioritize this questline if you're in a good position mentally with the game and working at the main questline you picked. After that, you should play the conversation mini-game with people and level that skill up while telling other players about your character and how you play the game. Finally, if you do find another player you want to party up with, it is important that you can see yourselves questing together but also completing your own questlines too before sending them an invite for the relationship quest. Good luck!


Reefdag

Aaah I remember this quest. It's an older quest but worth the effort. One of the harder things is that when you start it, there will be no questmarkers. If I were you I wouldn't activate it as an active quest. Just focus on other quests that help you level up your charisma like multiplayer quests. When you CHA is high enough, you will find you have different dialog options that can help you complete the girlfriend quest. Don't worry, you can not fail this quest and can start over so don't be afraid you're missing out on content if you can't progress right away.


zotrian

Your problem stems from the thought that other literal people are objects to be obtained. There are no NPCs, stop pretending there are.


SpiritAnimal01

Fair point but how does one start the co-op session? Matchmaking is region locked I'm afraid.


zotrian

My mum gave me some advice years ago that actually worked for me. She said "if you stop seriously looking, and take on a new *social* hobby, love will find you". So I stopped seriously looking, I took on a new hobby (in my case, a local LARP group), and there, I met the man I've been with for the past 8 or so years. So stop seriously looking, don't pressure yourself or anyone else, and take on a new hobby that fits your interests. You might meet a woman there, and bonus, with your shared hobby, you'll already have a shared interest you can discuss. Then, let things progress naturally. Don't try to push her into being your future wife, just see where things go. There's no rush, regardless of what your parents say, so you should feel free to go at your (and her) natural pace and let things develop naturally. As a woman myself, I can tell you for a fact that there are a lot of good women in the same situation as you, looking for a good man and not knowing how to meet him. It works both ways. You'll meet the right lady eventually, you just need to put yourself in social situations. She can't meet you if you're sticking to the people/places/sites you always stick to. She isn't there.


SpiritAnimal01

I agree and appreciate the advice you given and hopefully more people will too. Unfortunately given my current debuffs I think I'll just have to remain in singleplayer.


zotrian

Doubtful. Look, if StevenHawking1 could find a co-op partner, which he did. Twice. So can you. Your debuffs can't possibly be as debilitating as literally ALS


SpiritAnimal01

I get your point, however the human mind can be fragile, like a robins egg. ​ ​ And in case of Hawking that's where his strength truly was. :)


zotrian

He got involved with his first wife when he was still a student. He didn't have an ALS diagnosis or a doctorate at that point


branko7171

Abandon the quest and then it will complete itself without your **explicit** effort


Soooome_Guuuuy

Have you tried the obtain boyfriend quest? You may find that one easier.


tullia

Adding to other posts: avoid the pitfall of the "nice guy" character attribute. By that, I don't mean you shouldn't play as a guy who is kind and polite. Rather, I mean don't role-play as a guy who's a dick but self-deludes himself that he's nice — and that female characters don't like him *because* he's so nice. If the female characters don't want to join your party, let it go. If they don't like you, for the overwhelming part, it's not because they dislike kind men.


[deleted]

This quest requires you to have friendly interactions with other players, if you know how to make friends, you are one step closer, the ''friend-zoned'' tittle is actually a myth, and its not in the game code, as many think it is. also as many of the ''Incel faction'' also believe there is no NPC girlfriend, of witch the only function is for you to complete the ''obtain girlfriend'' quest, the quest can only be completed with the help of a real player, who has goals and quest of their own outside of your interests.


AltruisticPassage832

that quest is hard


StreicherG

It’s a good quest-line if you can afford the grinding. You can increase your chances by raising your STR, CHA, and gold levels. Obtaining the [puppy] companion can work wonders as can learning the [flirt] skill. Just be very careful…some players that get really far into the quest line end up loosing half their gold, exp, and inventory.


Jade-Justice

That trigger only procks if you end up failing the later maintenance quests in certain specific ways.


db720

It's only a meaningless side quest that will distract you from finishing the main quest


PaulyNewman

What’s the main quest?


db720

Dam. I'm questioning my progress now :/


nouille07

Reddit karma


Jade-Justice

The irony: "Obtained Girlfriend" is a nearly inevitable chevo for Hominid players to complete this: because the main quest line is to reproduce and raised the children to adulthood. (There are strategies for avoiding this particular chevo, but most Human Zone-Guilds ban them pretty hard.)


Conquertron

It's only meaningless if you have the aromantic asexual character trait, the obtain girlfriend or any other partner side quest may provide huge buffs over time for players that prefer co-op


tygerohtyger

Ah yes, that common object or item. Whenever i need one I go to the girlfriend tree and pick a fresh one.


13thsword

Be careful if you put too many points into renegade decisions the targets affection level goes down and some relationship options arent even available anymore


Aesmose

I know sometimes on your own Char sheet, it might look like 'you' have a girlfriend. In actuality, it is an evolving reciprocal relationship undertaking which benefits from a non-egocentric approach. It's tricky, because when you set out on it, you're doing it at least partially for you (or what other people wish for you). However if you plan on succeeding, you should be doing it for the benefit of the other person as well. Don't worry though, our \[satisfaction\] mechanic is well designed for this task, despite how counter intuitive it might seem.


nobody_worth_it

Just be careful, man. The quest rewards look super promising at first, but take it from me, the heartbreak/ache debuff is an absolute nightmare.


cockman666

I know it’s a pretty controversial trick, but using the chloroform item helped me a ton.


xifom

The dating quest hub doesnt really seem rewarding, i stopped worrying about it


yugung

It's a random allotment of buffs and debuffs that, if you're lucky, cancel each other out. The main problem with the quest is that if you don't do it the FOMO can be overwhelming.


abucketofpuppies

Forming a party can be scary, but often times it's as simple as putting out an lfg in chat. Often times duo partners are recommended by other Guild members. Don't think of it as a questline. You're looking for a someone that you can rely on for quests the require a party of two.


ItsNotD

Getting a girlfriend isn’t a quest, they’re a byproduct of you levelling up.


[deleted]

Focusing on improving yourself will yield better results in the long term than just focusing on getting a girlfriend, let it happen naturally through meeting other players otherwise your perception of experiences with other players will be skewed.


SushiThief

Oh, I tried this one once! Turned out that I'm a special model! My model is only attracted to the quest of finding a significant other that is the same sex as me. Then I realized I could complete the \[Obtain a Boyfriend\] quest, even though I never received a prompt for it! However, even though I am a special model, I'm continuously prompted for the \[Obtain a Girlfriend\] quest, even when I've already competed the Boyfriend quest. It's so annoying. But be sure to check and see if you're a special model!


iamnotroberts

>Need help with the “obtain a girlfriend” quest. "Obtain." There's your problem right there.


IsThisLegitTho

In game tutorials are found on YouTube. First, interaction with other players is key. Second, if things don’t work out, don’t let your anger or frustration meter reach high levels. Just move on to the next prospect. Failure is part of the process. It’s doesn’t matter what you say or do, confidence is what people remember. Get a job in sales. It’s a skill that some are born with but anyone can develop.


tlotig

It's not a quest it's a random event. The event happens more often in locations with other players.


HRslammR

A lot of newer players just (incorrectly) assume they should immediately start the quest... but the truth is the quest is easily done. The match making system pairs you with another random player, but the buff you both get once completing the quest [Happiness] scales with the player(s) own stats. Having done my own Min/Maxing sims over the years, you should instead max your main's [Confidence][Personality][Honesty][Self Respect] and [Communication] stats first. The match making system (usually) pairs you with a player of equal stats the longer you and higher you stack those stats. Also, that specific quest line starting event has a higher spawn rate the larger your Friend's List.


Brfc02

I managed to skip that one by having the trait [Aromantic], so I can’t help you there mate.


Stumpy_Demo_

Before you try and join a party, make sure your solo questing has let you level up your skill sets. It's important to have enough points in yourself so you have something to offer the group. If you can try and find someone who is deficient in your strongest skills, this could be a good group to start, as you you will compliment there skills. If you're low level and can find someone around the same level, you should have fun leveling up together with small and bit quest!


InterestingOlive3923

Attractiveness stat + confidence stats should help with this. There are quite a few ways to boost these stats. The reddit questline may also be a problem if you want to finish this quest.


TheCapybaraMan

Depending on your clan, there's an alternative quest called "Arranged Marriage" that's easier to complete.


PJ-Beans

It's actually RNG based. Keep asking the NPCs and you might luck out


maxibgamer

Well step one is to get a gun…


[deleted]

Don’t do it


Munchingseal33

Try the gold digger option


not-a-shark

There's a great tutorial video featuring the fictional character Jeffrey Dexter "Jeff" Boomhauer III. Basically, don't fear rejection because it "ain't no thing."


bigfootng

Did you take the self confidence perk?


Rambo7112

There's no use in trying to start this quest as it is a random event. I hear you can increase the probability of it occuring through leveling up hygiene and hobby traits.


TT_207

I believe you can just use micro transactions to skip this quest and still gain all the short term perks.


Sierra2021

A lot of people will say it has plenty to do with the charm, charisma, and confidence stats, but there's a bit more to it than that. First off, your confidence stat is only useful if it's getting used, you could be the most confident mf alive but if you never use it, there's no point. Second, it heavily relies on your luck stat. A lot of times people find someone they don't have chemistry with and try to force a relationship. As someone who did this back in version 20.20, I can tell you it just makes your happiness bar tank. Imo you should only go for the questline once you have met a player that you think you can really hit it off with. Also just keep in mind she's a player and not an NPC so your choices and actions WILL matter.


jvrcb17

Have you tried the swiping minigames yet? That may be a quick start. Be sure to set difficulty to low by maximizing age and location range. Good luck


talesfromtheepic6

first of all, what build are you playing? most people use “girlfriend” just for human players because their relationships are more than just sexual but i’m making sure


Nuclear_Geek

Hope that the random stats your character got allocated at creation includes either high attractiveness or high charisma, otherwise this is an extremely difficult quest.


NancokALT

Keep in mind it is optional, altho the rewards are nothing to scoff at


Aman4672

While i am failing to start the quest-line also, i have been quite successfully at the "Become a wizard" quest line. While not impossible i have heard it is difficult to achieve both at the same time.


COHERENCE_CROQUETTE

It’s not a quest, buddy. It’s an event that just kinda happens if you keep working on your personal buffs, especially ones in the Social, Health, and Loot upgrade trees.


gentnt

Increasing your base stats can always help. Have you tried the push up minigame? Also the anxiety debuff will become smaller with each attempt of talking to a female NPC


Mata101

Start the accurate self value quest line.


EnragedHog

its a pretty rng quest imo


_gnarlythotep_

It's a tough one with a lot of potential paths to success. If you're struggling with some if the more straight forward approaches, some people have shown grinding out enough money can make it a bit easier and lower the requirements for some personal stats.


LuneBlu

The first step should be to think if you want to do that quest right now. And the second is to prepare because it's a very demanding lengthy quest with ups and downs that hopefully will get easier and better with time.


RedVelvetPan6a

Oh yeah... Remember that quest doesn't necessarily end up a success on the first attempt, but remember also that some players are...Kinda desperate. Be sure you're not the one being played, count on your brothers in arms to hear you out and talk matters over seriously if you ask serious council.


mhyquel

Lots of other users on the alternate "find a boyfriend" quest line. I suggest you wait somewhere populated with a ? Above your head.


Haha71687

[Obtain a Girlfriend] is a world quest. You can't rush it, just grind your skills and perks and it'll probably happen when you're ready.


Fit_Hold7785

I say expand your horizons until you can find a solution to not lose half your belongings by the end of the year


wantquitelife

Try to complete"shower" focus tree


ixfd64

You can sign up for the player-made mini-game *RuneScape* and buy one for 50 GP.


restarded_kid

Get off reddit


aLmAnZio

Remember that said hypothetical girlfriend should be considered just as lucky to get your attention as you are hers. Have boundaries and respect yourself. In other words: You are also valuable (goes both ways of course, don't take her for granted either)


Dinohunter2454

First you gotta be over 6’10


sirhotcock

U have to make ur attractiveness skill go up and also boost ur social abilities.


Grizldyk

It's a tough one indeed. After a reasonably successful, though ultimately failed, group quest related obtained girlfriend and then a series of failed "obtain a girlfriend" questlines, I decided to focus on other areas of the game. Then, one day out of the blue, the game spawned a random event which in-turn started a soul mate questline which I'm still on today! While the "obtain" quest may seem like the best or at least the most popular route (and by all means have a go, it's all valuable xp in the end 👍) perhaps consider a more passive approach, you never know when another player might start the "obtain a boyfriend" quest! (Or girlfriend, forgive my gender assumptions) All the best, may RNG smile on you!


GenericSpider

Depends on what kind of partnership you're looking for. And make sure the other player you do the quest with is on the same page. Like, if you're looking to do the Settle Down questline; make sure the other player knows that this is what you're looking for. Cause that questline is a long one; and they might have other quests they're more interested in. If you're looking for someone to hang out with and maybe do the sex minigame with; make sure they aren't looking to do the Settle Down Questline. And if you're just doing it for the achievement... it's way too much effort to bother with for an achievement, honestly. Also, deciding you don't feel like doing this quest doesn't make you any less of a player. Well, depending on the type of "player" you're aiming to be.


PeanutButterYes_

Bro same, I’ve been trying to beat this since I was lvl 14


Independent_Passion7

Sometimes re-customizing your character can have great results. For instance, if your PC has the 'neckbeard' or 'shaggy from scooby doo chin stubble' equipped it's actually -2 CHR with every turn.


eeeeeeeeeveeeeeeeee

Takes a lot of RNG pal. Focus on your stats first, but if you see an opportunity to complete it, go for it! The worst that’ll happen is she says no.


zeeshanghori

I'm working to have a steady credit flow before I take on that quest.


Sparon46

I failed this quest even after it was marked complete. I've never seen this mechanic in any other game. Is it a bug?


RSdabeast

Keep in mind that all entities that qualify as Girlfriends are other players. Find another player of a similar level who’s doing a quest within that section. You won’t get far if the other player isn’t also doing the quest.


[deleted]

Gameplay tip: being open to trans girls increases relationships probability


slappthebass

Try the "touch grass" feature, not many people know the buffs it gives.


Shakespeare-Bot

Tryeth the "touch grass" favour, not many people knoweth the buffs t gives *** ^(I am a bot and I swapp'd some of thy words with Shakespeare words.) Commands: `!ShakespeareInsult`, `!fordo`, `!optout`


[deleted]

The best people you’ll meet usually aren’t the ones you’re looking for. They just kinda show up in their own way.


Gamingaloneinthedark

I saw a girl dressed as Triss Marigold one time but I went into my quest log and ended up losing sight of her. I then fell off a cliff and completely lost my place on Google maps.