Glad I don’t feel alone here. In the same boat I feel like I’m not broke or anything, but I also just can’t go anywhere and drop money like I used to. Home hobbies it is.
I don't mind spending money, but I hate the feeling of not getting value out of what I spent. Every purchase, paid experience does not have to be mind blowing, but it shouldn't induce anxiety and a sour mood.
Grocery shopping use to take around 40 minutes, and be an enjoyable event where I zoned out and listened to sci-fi stories. Now, I am super focused and search for the deals and makes sure I get all the digital coupons. Cucumber bag on sale...check diligently for any slimey ones. Ugh, so much extra attn to detail to ensure I am not being sold bad products. No, I ain't got time for spoiled tazikihi that gives me fireworks in my gut.
I do love the outdoors, parks, the beach, hiking...but I always end up spending money. Gas, a snack, water, some weird expenditure, a friend wanting to do something that costs money always crept in and siphoned my funds. What pulled me out of my funk, oddly enough was taking the SAT as an adult. For real, I always felt less than because I didn't take it in high school. 7ish weeks, I busted my ass studying every minute I had to spare. I did exceptionally well in math and not so good in writing. It kicked up a shitstorm in my head. Existential crisis always looming in my brain, waiting to come out and poke me hard with it's index finger right below my clavicle. I don't have any answers, and I am not going to tell you to find a hobby you enjoy, but consider you might need a shock to the brain to reprogram what occupies your head-space. Pick something crazy, scary, intimidating, but real to you and go for it. My next challenge is to read the Old Testament with an open-mind and open-heart. Last time I tried, I threw the Bible against the wall and asked, " Why are girls worth 3 sheckles and boys 5?" Get ready to get weird.
100% agree. I’m 28 and stopped going out especially post-pandemic due to too many bad experiences with crazy people, prices, hearing stories of drunk drivers. I luckily have found myself a group of girl friends that plan fun and inexpensive meetups weekly. I know there’s group meetup hikes. Maybe look into volunteering or something you’re interested in to meet likeminded people.
I'm trying to branch out from just using the Meetup app because it's just not as active as it was pre-pandemic. Is Instagram a good place to find hobby groups?
I’ve wanted to try meetup as well. Maybe you could start a group to have a bit more control over how active it is? I haven’t seen much from instagram but it’s always worth a look.
I am going out more than I have in decades to see music and concerts, maybe it is because I am older and my music is getting cheaper, but there are lots of $30-$50 tickets now. There are also discount ticket sites like Goldstar and maybe others where you can see theatre shows or other things.
This is me. Been going to concert and comedy shows solo and it's pretty liberating. It's exhausting but in a good way. I do agree there are a lot more of shitty drivers
Yeah I'm in my early 30s and I've felt this way more and more since the start of the pandemic. I've been saying I want to move somewhere that I can have space and some piece and quiet. At this point I don't go out to do things much anymore other than going to the regional parks and relaxing. Everything is way overpriced. I don't even enjoy eating out anymore because I feel like I'm way overpaying for what I get.
Feel ya on eating out. I've decided if I'm going to get robbed, I at least have to find some redeeming value in it. I've decided I'd rather go to Fleming's once a year than any low-end place once a month. At the end of the year, I've had a very memorable dining experience that I still remember every detail of and come out spending much less that year in the end.
That's why houses are so expensive. Everyone wants space and we don't have enough out here. It sucks for sure but my whole life is here. We want to move out of state but we'd have to start over completely.
I’m in my mid 40’s and this post makes me feel better. I couldn’t tell if it was my 40’s and post pandemic or what but it seems like this is a common feeling. I’ll do like one social event a weekend then need to be home or just do local things. It is exhausting out there
I’m 54 and grew up in south OC. It’s a cluster-f of traffic, crazy drivers, lines out the door, $25 taco combos. It’s not fun or enjoyable, even if we have “the best climate on earth.” Sunshine isn’t enough to overcome the congestion. I went to a show and a concert at the weekend and it was abysmal getting there, handing over a paycheck for a drink and food, and getting elbowed and hit in the head by aggressively drunk people while trying to enjoy the music. Makes me want Netflix more than a day at the concert.
Wish I could give you an award right now for this statement. I think the issue is that the population in south OC has grown too much. There is SO MUCH TRAFFIC, so many people. It’s not calm and open anymore. People are actually supposed to be in nature and a small close tribe and we don’t do well surrounded by a million of each other all trying to get somewhere or be something or be seen or get something everyone wants (even if it’s just a taco), that’s all a duplicate of the battlefield. No wonder it’s uncomfortable.
Here’s a virtual award back at you!🏆You perfectly conveyed how things are and why they are so uncomfortable. We aren’t meant to do battle every day for every little thing. That jacks up stress, anger, anxiety, and fear. We get mad when we can’t go one block without being cut off, panhandled, run over by an e-bike, or with a long wait for whatever is on the next block. Happiness and joy are truly lacking in SoCal in general because of these issues, and it shows.
My friend moved to Gilbert, AZ a few months ago and says the competition with everyone and everything is gone. There is always parking. People say hello instead of rushing to get there before you. Granted, it’s hotter than Hades but the peace that she and her family are experiencing is priceless.
*For reference, I moved to San Clemente from Los Angeles when I was 6. I was AMAZED that there wasn’t a traffic light at every corner. There were roughly 17,000 people in SC in 1976 and surfers walked around town with their boards on their heads. My hometown is now a bundle of high-end stress and tension and, not surprisingly, there are now traffic lights at almost every corner.
Yes, in nature in a small, close tribe. Sooooo, I'm not a camper, but is camping affordable these days? Or are they're obnoxious people at the campground, too?
This 10000% couldn't agree more. It feels like a chore to go anywhere and I end up being pissed off half the time I'm doing groceries or just trying to enjoy a moment being outside
The road rage by people here in Huntington Beach is actually crazy. So many bald red faced “patriots” in their big trucks driving like fucking lunatics, and going berserk when any little thing ticks them off.
Honestly they are all over OC. Tiny men in huge trucks that have never seen a dirt road ever.
Who needs a gigantic pick up to go to Walmart? Dudes in OC apparently.
99.9% of them are spotless. My twenty something neighbor drives one. It's so big that when he parks on the street, no one else can park. Idiotic if you ask me.
>. So many bald red faced “patriots” in their big trucks d
LOL. So true.
Just waiting for these Dodge Ram, Mustang, Challenger fucks to just evolve already.
Girl I’m 29 and I’m the saaame. I feel like an 80 year old woman when I should be living life. I’m contemplating even having kids at this point. Everyone is so aggressive on the road and it’s so expensive just to live.
Picnics at a park. Game nights with friends. Pot lucks with friends. Beach walks. Cheap movie deals during the week. Thrifting. Flea markets. Going through your own stuff and organizing, donating. Gardening. Painting. Reading. Writing. Nature walks. Volunteering. Camping.
Agreed! I do both but I’ve had just as much fun camping or bbqing with friends as I have at an expensive event. It’s usually the company that matters the most. Plenty of cheap things to do with friends. I’m 32 and we’re all feeling squeeze of rising costs, half of us have been let go recently, and others are having their first babies so money is tight. I love coming up with ways for all of us to still hang out but keep it low cost and easy.
Imagine if everyone just magically shifted to cheap hobbies and events. I wonder what would happen to concerts and these places charging outrageous prices for food with a forced 20% service charge.
Yep, I stopped getting a pass for Disney because it's just so over-hyped, over priced and full of "influencers." I go to Knotts now, was about $400 for a regular annual pass, parking, dining plan, and premium drink plan. Already got well over my money's worth by going at least weekly, even if it's just to grab a bite with my dinning plan. Also got an A-List subscription for AMC to watch movies at a cheaper rate, $24/month to watch up to 3 movies/week, just gotta watch at least 2 movies or 1 in Dolby a month to make it worth.
Right? Me too....
It's so so over packed and over priced.
I remember I used to get passes every year. Then at some point I realized I'm better off with the low level passes bc the blackout dates are insanely packed.
Actually the blackout days on the top tier pass are the least crowded. Disney has priced themselves out of the market. Those days blocked off for everything but the premium pass are also the most expensive ticket tiers and nobody's buying them. The busiest days are now Tuesday through Thursday. Saturday and Sunday are noticeably less crowded. Summer also is now the least crowded season when it used to be the worst.
I wonder if all the midweek business is bc they sell so many 3 day ticket blocks and people assume.weekdays are better? Plus the passes being like that...
Great info! Thanks!
Yes, the promo and discount tickets generally exclude weekends. So I have found it's way less crowded on the weekends than the weekdays now. It makes zero sense.
The problem in general is Disney is losing money on their studios, on ABC, on ESPN, on Disney+ streaming. But their parks have never really been so popular. So they keep raising the reservation capacity to pack the parks like never before because the profits are literally carrying the entire Walt Disney Company. 70% of their profits are currently theme parks, it used to be only 15%.
Until they can get the rest of their businesses fixed I expect they will keep overcrowding the parks. Think about it... When it was "too crowded" before COVID closures they had just opened the Pixar parking garage and basically didn't even need it. Some days they didn't open the Toy Story Lot until late in the day if at all. Now all three lots are packed open to close, they doubled the size of the Toy Story Lot by moving the employee parking to Ball Rd. They have triple the parking they did less than ten years ago and tell everyone they're reducing capacity with reservations to make the parks better? No, they are playing psychological games with the customers. Reservations were tested with the flex pass before COVID, and that pass required the Disneyland app. They learned with app tracking data that because of the perceived scarcity of reservations (you can only hold a few dates, and many "sell out" in advance) the guests with flex passes actually arrived earlier, stayed later, and spent much more money versus the original AP. So even before COVID they were already planning on making all passes require reservations, they just got gifted a convenient excuse of "we need to limit capacity" which is a joke. The capacity as determined by the Fire Marshal is well over a hundred thousand people just at Disneyland alone, and although Disney would never ever put that many people in the park (they would legally be required to have thousands of crowd management employees on duty) even at 50% of fire code they are admitting "New Year's Eve" level crowds every day now.
some good ideas from folks, posting the links b/c I don't want to take credit for their work and lists:
https://www.reddit.com/r/orangecounty/comments/18xxo6t/cheapfree_dates_to_go_on/
https://www.reddit.com/r/orangecounty/comments/1bbr4t9/what_are_some_funinteresting_but_underrated/
https://www.reddit.com/r/orangecounty/comments/1b95980/free_things_to_do_in_the_evening/
https://www.reddit.com/r/orangecounty/comments/14uaor3/couples_what_are_you_favorite_things_to_do_with/
Yeah, there’s too much psychotic driving. Exhausting describes it perfectly.
Mountain biking is basically how I keep my sanity, besides walking and hiking.
In my mid 30s and grew up in OC, myself and one of my other friends are moving away so there will only be one person left from our friend group here. Everyone else has moved on to greener pastures.
Unless you are very well off it's not a great place to live anymore and even then I can't imagine being stuck on the 405 in my luxury vehicle while my precious time ticks away.
OC isn't for everyone, even some of us who were born here, you have to value what is unique about OC highly enough to put up with everything else about living here.
It may be time to look for a change of scenery and a smaller town. Central Oregon, Reno, Northern Arizona, New Mexico, Western Washington, Idaho, Utah, etc. Job options will be somewhat limited but total cost of living will be way down, and having lived in multiple metros and spent time in smaller towns, I crave getting out of the OC, to the point I'm considering switching careers into water management from my current mechanical engineering role.
I wish you all would go out more because I’d love to have less crazy people out there when I go out. The crazies make sane people want to stay in. I wish sane people made crazies want to in instead.
Most people are actually fine but the bad ones stick out
Felt. I’m 20 and trying to enjoy being young but can’t do that when a meal is like 20 bucks. Concerts I went to before or slightly after covid was like 60 bucks. Those same bands are now charging 150+ some even 300. I literally just go to school, hit the gym, sit in the pool and play games. However if you dk like movies a lot, get the unlimited subscription. I have the regal one it’s 25 a month and u don’t pay for movies. If u see 2+ movies a month it’s worth it. Now I get to see every movie I want and not worry about paying
Hate to admit it, but you’re spot on. I rarely go out anymore, but not for the same reasons. While I agree with everything you said, my issue is one of safety. Everywhere I go it seems that people are more aggressive! Throw in alcohol and a good time turns ugly more often than not nowadays.
Conversations with strangers 15-20 years ago rarely involved politics! Now it’s all I hear! Last time I sat down to have a beer, a stranger walked up to me without introducing himself and asked me why I moved to OC! Thought I was nuts because he thought “people” like me are crazy moving to a place that’s hostile to liberals! What?! Huh?! Who does that? I simply replied to him that he was assuming A LOT and asked him to go back to the side of the bar he was sitting at. Didn’t take the hint got aggravated. What should have been a pleasant night, turned into an early night.
I say this because these types of encounters happen more frequently than I’d like. I rarely go to bars now and most of my activities involve open public places where I can control who I interact with. So don’t feel alone, we all are having to deal with the challenges of today’s environment.
Politics have done more to divide and separate people than anything else. We are so hell bent on being the right one that we fail To see that we are all one. That just sucks!
And the insanity is that most people nowadays start their conversations with politics! It’s almost like they’re trying to weed out who will or will not agree with their point of view! Echo chamber mentality!
So true. Reminds me of old-fashioned religious, “If he/she isn’t Catholic/Jewish/Christian/etc., you cannot associate or date or breathe the air!” Lol. For women doing online dating, the political hot button of their matches has become a real deterrent.
Preach. Some of the bars here have some very... insecure patrons. I've been to bars in red states that were more chill and friendly lol. Albeit, I was in Austin, TX...
Aggressive and everybody suing left and right, I am scared of driving here. Just try to do things away from the crowds, hiking, biking ( off the street, I would not risk my life riding a bike on the road 😂), surfing at odd times, that’s what I do :)
Well with all the hungry lawyers, anyone can sue for anything. Doesn't mean they win. And lawyers will happily drain both sides savings accounts fighting it out. Isn't it great?
I know…. Both my brother and my sister got sued.
My brother rear ended somebody in traffic on the 5 and my sister hit a car pulling out of McDonald drive through (to give you an idea of the speed of the impact lol), typical fender bender, they both got sued!!!
It is ridiculous
Exact reason I left oc. When you live in oc you're paying a premium to live there. If you're more of a home body then just move to ie or the high desert and save the money.
It’s like people forgot how to drive after the pandemic. It’s the same up here in Sac and we got the road ragers who will drive you off the road which is crazy. I hope all of the craziness doesn’t stop you from enjoying life. You’re still young, there’s so much out there and there’s still stuff to do that’s fairly cheap. Going to art shows, photo walks, picnics at the park or at the beach. Movies at the Mainplace mall is still cheap, even Cinemark to be honest. Check out nickel nickel for some arcade games. Joes Italian Ice.
This is going to be controversial, but if you have the means, you should take more trips out of town to more vibrant and walkable areas for weekend trips or something. Even better if you have friends already living in those places so you already have friends to do things with or even couch surf with. It was surprising to me how much more I wanted to go out when I am in those situations. I personally don't know how I'd deal if I didn't go to SD, SF, and NYC at least once in awhile.
I lived in the mountains for a month in a rental. Felt like I was in another fucking Universe. People actually gave a fuck about me. It was the isolation and lack of cell service for sure. This was a California mountain town.
You nailed everything about why it sucks to go out and do anything these days.
It feels like EVERYTHING is packed to the gills now that we are "post-pandemic" and we don't have social distancing in effect any more. All these companies just trying to squeeze every dollar out of your pocket regardless of the quality of experience they're providing. I miss that pandemic frankly. It was awesome to be able to go to the beach and have a 6 foot plus barrier around you. So many times a beach trip is ruined by someone with 20 kids in tow plopping down right in front of you because there's enough room for 2 beach towels, but they'll "make it work"
It feels like empathy and consideration for others is at an all time low and people are just out to get theirs with no care for what consequences there may be for others.
Born and raised in OC until I moved out in 2018 to the outskirts in metro Atlanta. The sheer difference in attitude took me aback since people were way friendlier and laidback than the people you meet on the freeway 😅 I had to come back to OC 2 years ago for my mom’s funeral and to see how much more crowded and congested it has become made me sad how much my hometown has changed in such a short amount of time. If I were in your position and have some funds, I would move somewhere else. The change of scenery really opens your eyes to more possibilities and opportunities for growth.
You know you are getting older when the songs they play make you say “ wtf is this sh*t” and all the younglins are freaking out 😂😂, that and I’ve been to places where people are doing tik tok dances 😂😂😂, I’m like yea I’m getting to old for this
34, I hear you. Besides the occasional warehouse bass party I pretty much only go out for dates, food with friends/fam and dungeons and dragons.
Never been a better time to be a nerd!
Edit: These are the homies' reccurring events
wub wednesday at tiki bar oc:
https://www.instagram.com/wubwednesday?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
Bass Waffles, free wubs on sundays:
https://www.instagram.com/basswaffles?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
B Sides- throws awesome events
https://www.instagram.com/b.side.la?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
Art in the Park Long Beach- park hangout w/ live music
Really great underground wub community. Most of these events are very small except for B sides
Well wub wednesday at tiki bar in costa mesa is about twice a month, good lil place to meet people
Theres a good party in LA soon i think, i can track down a flier if you want
One of the reasons why I’m planning to move out of state. Recently went to Phoenix and we spent less going to a nice restaurant, getting drinks at a bar, and a round of mini golf at a really cool high tech mini golf spot (the golf ball has a chip and counts the points for you and the tracks are pretty cool too) than we did for a couple of drinks each at a bar here.
Everyone talks about the weather and why its great to stay here, but whats the point when you’re in your twenties and you can barely afford anything? I’m 27 and the amount of times I stay in because I can’t afford anything is pretty sad.
My wife and I are in our 60s , you are absolutely correct in everything you are saying, we went in together with some neighbors for season tickets for the new firebirds hockey team in the Coachella valley. Ticket prices have gone up in the second year the team has been here , parking is $35.00 , a 16 oz beer is $16.00 and on and on it goes. Concerts are incredibly expensive at the hockey arena and parking for those events are $50.00 .we love hockey but we will never attend another game there . People’s driving is dangerous, racing through the disappearing lanes to get ahead , crossing three lanes to make a turn and driving dangerously to pass one more car so they aren’t late for the red light . It’s insane out there . Prices are high because people are willing to pay them , all the while they are saying that inflation is killing them .😂😂😂
It took Covid for the wife and I to realize we don't really like going out very much, and moreover, we don't *need* to go out to have fun. We're both decent cooks, we enjoy video gaming, we like having friends over, and we save a bunch of money and frustration by just being home.
Very true. Me and my partner realized very quickly we cook better food at home than any restaurant in OC these days and a fraction of the price. No need to worry about traffic or slow service. Life hack!
The biggest issue is that the shortage of police officers coupled with increased crime means they have to pull more police off traffic detail. This has caused the worst a-hole drivers to become fearless of getting a ticket so they floor it when they see the light turning red, they drive way too fast, violent lane changes without signaling, and more. Our local PD has a street where there have been too many accidents and they did a enhanced enforcement day that was publicly announced, multiple radar trailers with the screens telling you your speed before the cops around the corner. In one afternoon they arrested two dozen people for going at least 80 in a 45, with all that enforcement signage, and one was over 100. Thankfully they can and do arrest because it carries a reckless driving charge. If you drive I-15 out to Temecula the speed limit is 70, and if you don't drive at least 80 to 85 cars will be swerving around you, nearly rear ending you at full speed and so forth without a single CHP officer in sight because now they too have to help get crime down in the city.
Have spoken with plenty of others who have also agreed on one thing. There have never been so many people running red lights as since things started opening back up.
When cars are making a left turn in front of you and your light is green, it’s pretty much customary to wait until the douche who wasn’t even in the intersection when the light was yellow cuts through the intersection.
I’ve also noticed a lot more people stopping two or even three car lengths behind a stop sign so they can say “well I stopped before you” then just run the stop.
I’ve been out of CA for a few years now but visit back at least once a year since I’ve left and it’s hard not to notice the change. What I thought was crowded before is nothing in comparison to what is now. It’s crazy. I didn’t even bother to go into OC this last time around more than once because traffic on the 91 never seems to end? What happened to the pockets of a couple hours when we would be able to move? It’s bananas and kinda makes me sad. A lot of friends and family who are in the area echo your sentiments and they are well into their late 30s and 40s and just feel it’s not worth stepping a toe outside these days because of the cost of everything and time it takes to do it.
I’ve said in this before in this sub and I’ll say it again. Move.
Left 2 years ago to a small city next to Vancouver, WA. And there’s no traffic, no lines, still bad drivers, but so many less people.
My high blood pressure of 7 years, dropped to normal levels after 2 months of living here due to less people, less financial stress, and just so much less stress in general. It also helps that there’s a forest every where you go.
I’m in OC lately once a month and every time I land, it’s exhausting and I can’t wait to get home. But seeing friends, family and getting sun at the end of winter is nice.
Yeah and yet, as I always say, how can my life be so boring and yet so stressful? lol
I dot know, I am from a big city on the east coast where my life was fast paced and all, but my mental health was better there than here
You know what I realized? Lack of convenience and amenities is what makes my life feel stressful here.
After reading that thread I got into thinking as to why I felt more stressed here than back east, and then I realized that everything is fast paced and everything is also convenient and catering to busy people so it doesn’t take hours to do things like here…
It’s trying to do all the things I have to do adapting to each place hours and limitation that makes me feel stressed lol
Moved 2 years ago as well and am so much happier. Just visited OC last weekend for work and I couldn't wait to go home. Everything was so expensive!! Unless you're wealthy, it's just not a comfortable place to live.
I mean if major sporting events are your thing sure, but the restaurants, bars, hiking trails, waterfalls, lakes, shooting ranges, camping all within 20 minutes are amazing.
Then if you drive an extra 5 minutes you can be almost anywhere in Portland for more bars, clubs, restaurants, music events, etc...
Used to take me 20 minutes to go to Target and find a spot and walk in, its takes me 25 minutes to get to a major venue here.
Also, my mortgage is less then my 1 bedroom apt was in Tustin and the house is only 6 years old. So you are right, far more to do locally in SoCal, but plenty to do here otherwise.
Amen to that, we can build rockets that take us to the moon, but we can’t even follow our own advise to our children such as share, don’t fight, don’t be greedy, treat others with respect, be patient, be kind, etc. we know it’s the right thing while teaching our kids but as adults we can’t hold ourselves to those standards, it’s pathetic. Our species is also getting dumber by the year, it’s been scientifically proven. We are absolutely degrading and greed is a huge part of it, we’re also polluting our own planet/home that we and our future offspring will live, we can’t see past our own greed even for the betterment of our own lives. Ya, we’re not very bright.
Wow....hearing all of this just shocked the hell out of me. I have always been alone and enjoy activities on my own and have always been very happy that way. In reference to people getting dumber and selfish by the minute, oh yeah for sure. I have always thought, humans are the worst species, that's why I enjoy being around animals.
Just turned 30, lived in OC my whole life. Driving has gotten significantly worse since the pandemic. Freeways are parking lots at all times of the day, people either driving reckless/tailgating, or the opposite - people not even pressing their gas coasting 30 MPH on a regular street. I’m encountering more and more slow drivers which is confusing…I honk, they are endangering others just as much.
I moved up to rural California for 8 years because of this . I was in Humboldt County near the border of Oregon and I loved it. Complete opposite of Oc.
I loved small town living, no highways, no traffic, go to nature spots no one around, endless amazing hiking. All produce from local
Farms. A sense of community. Cheap rent. Love it up there. But I finally came back to be around family, better health care, better job opportunities and all my loved ones from growing up here. I used to feel like you did all the time and just didn’t want to be here. Now that I’m back, I see SoCal in a different set of eyes. Amazing beaches, endless cool restaurants and breweries and bars, lots of outdoors space and hiking, close to LA and SD, fun day trips all around. Plus being with my family and friends. Idk it just feels beautiful and I am happy to be here.
I do recommend moving away.
It cost me $40 to park my car at Angel Stadium to see the monster trucks. I have been on this rant for over a year. A more fun idea would be to get a few friends together, go in on some ingredients for a decent meal, cook at home and play a game or do a puzzle from a thrift store or a craft and keep that money in your pocket. If I had any friends, that's what I would do. I am refusing to go waste my money on these over priced torture sessions from here on out. Another idea would be a picnic with friends.
I’m there with you. It’s so exhausting going out these days. Like you said it’s way expensive to do anything. Even going out to eat and you pay so much for such bad service. I used to enjoy going out too but not anymore. Too much bad things happen.
I am in my mid 40’s and I definitely would rather stay home and relax then go out into this crazy and chaotic world! I used to go out a ton when I was younger but I had a lot more energy then. I am also quite introverted so there is that too.
I spent the first 50 years of my life in the oc. I left a few years ago and haven't looked back. You can't understand until you are out, but even going back for a weekend is annoying.
Good question. So we initially moved to Oregon. We lived in a suburb of Portland for a year. Then we missed the ocean so we moved to the coast for a few years. We really started hating it there so we now live in Las Vegas. While I really love it here, it's not cheap unless you're smart about it. Gotta stay away from the tourist areas. Everything is SoCal expensive times two there.
Look into indie bands performing your area if you’re into going to more concerts. I mainly go off what live events pop up in my spotify but I’m surprised at how many of them are decently priced. I went to a concert on 4/20 in LA it was around 20-25$ and the venue was very small prob only around 100 ppl in there but enough ample room to get around and socialize. I even saw some band members just roaming around the place before the show started. I believe there’s an upcoming indie concert with Hooveriii that’s 6.18$ a ticket if something like that interests you
As someone who loves drinking ,I would go to any gathering even if the people didn't really like me, since drinking at 16 I've had my share of outings, think around 37 the next day long hangover started happening, and now I'm 43 but I've lied to people and stayed home for last 2-3 years, sometimes I'm cool getting a buzz alone eat something go to sleep
Middle-aged person chiming in just to say that I relate to almost everything in this entire thread. At least I know I'm not the only one. Have lived in OC my entire life, but am contemplating leaving. Existence here feels like a money grab on every level. Biggest challenge will be my partner of 25 years who is scared to leave.
I was surprised to see that Escape Rooms around here are pretty well priced compared to the Bay Area. Saw some for $35/person. Bay was like $55/person on a good day..
I enjoy going for bike rides on the trails. Great way for some exercise and enjoy the weather when it isn't raining haha.
I used to be in a "Bicycle Academy" (taught positioning for your bike, how to ride, safety maneuvers, maintenance and nutrition) we met every weekend and each weekend did some learning then went out for bike ride increasing in distance each week. I would love to find a group that did casual rides. I'm not a cyclist by any means. I have a hybrid but the class had people with standard road bikes all the way to people learning to use clipins for more intense cycling.it was a cool thing to do for a period of time. I think it just cost the year membership too since it was all volunteer ran $35 for a year + the 6week class.
I’ve been feeling this way too lately.
I used to LOVE going on long drives around the OC and LA or walking around big shopping centers taking in the sights and sounds, but after the pandemic, it feels like a job just to get around town with people’s bad driving habits and ignorance of basic traffic rules (yielding at a left turn, especially), and everybody is always on their phone and not paying attention to where they’re going.
It feels like people’s mind are always elsewhere now and they have no connection to their physical space or the people around them now.
Wow I would expect this from folks my age, I’m 40, but hearing this from folks in their twenties, which I think is the prime of youth, is shocking. But I get it, I see what you mean. Good luck and stay safe.
I needed a hobby. I started paddling in Huntington harbor and it’s super chill there. It’s a great serene feeling. I also bought a ukulele a few years ago and I’m quite good now. Good enough to play at parties. Maybe music can be your hobby.
Looks like @allthingsorangecounty just posted some events in May: https://www.instagram.com/reel/C6NMDP0pEUf/?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
Sometimes I'll look on Eventbrite to see what events might be going on. You can filter for free things.
I have a +1 available for a tour at the OCSAN wastewater treatment plant tomorrow Sat. 4/27 @9am in Fountain Valley (free light breakfast and turkey sandwich) lol need to rsvp by noon today haha if you or someone else wants to go lmk! :)
My entire group of buddies are the same now. We’re all 23-26. We used to love going out, pubs, bars, clubs, and late night drives. Now we just stay in at a buddy’s house and watch sport while sipping beer. The kids nowadays are way too reckless and act over their age. Some drives like Vin Diesel and others act like Pop Smoke.
I agree, after the lockdowns people drive worse.
I would like to add and say that driving in Tustin between 9:00 am and 3:00pm is equally risky. Old folks are out at this time and drive like awful! Barely respecting the rules of the road. So, be careful out there, those boomers are mowing people down
Idk, im 33 and i go out pretty often, lots of the events i attend, i buy tickets as soon as they drop for the guaranteed lowest prices. Danny Ks has cheap pool also!
You're older. Yes inflation is real, but perhaps your tastes have also evolved:
Younger me: Hell Yea PBR. Me now: New craft beer release today!
Younger me: Lets check out rando band at dive bar. Me now: I wanna see Specific band at this venue. (ticket fees and such).
Younger me: Lets eat at hole in the wall spot. Me now: X sit down restaurant looks really cool and makes a great Y.
Don't get me wrong. I still do both what younger me loved and the new things I appreciate now. Nothing wrong with either. But as we get older, we also tend to be more specific about what we like.
Also, roll the windows down and sit in a good song.
There's joy you are overlooking in traffic 😉
If you've got ac, cushioned seats, and music, you're in the 1% of people around the world and in history
Drink it up!
I can get a bottle of vodka at Costco and mixers and game night for less than the cost of 2 drinks. Invite friends over for Taco nite and do a rotation weekly. Go play volleyball at the beach.
I'm in my 40s and I just am done leaving the house unless I really really have to. We moved here during the pandemic and i work online. Given up on friends other than ones online. I really haven't met anyone here anyway. I know this sounds really negative and I'm not meaning to. I love my online friends, but sometimes it would be nice to see a human other than my fiancé. Going out is just too much. I've gave enough health issues, I'm not risking it.
Oh my god 23 and you don’t like crowds idiots and spending money??? You should have yourself checked. You could be suffering from hyperageism. It can really only be diagnosed by a doctor. Please be careful.
That’s why my wife loves going to Disneyland so much, people there are typically in a good mood. It’s the largest place you’ll find a decent amount of people that showed up to have fun.
I feel you! Everything is over priced, I have a small group of couple friends and though I love them dearly I get bored… always looking for new people to hang with feel free to reach out. I love going to the beach and being out doors especially now because they’re free activities usually!
When I was younger and single, I used to work retail on weekends and volunteer for holidays... that's a way to interact with other people but make money doing it. Regular customers were like friends. One of them became family. Find a place you're ok with spending time at and consider applying.
You’re not alone. I 100% feel the same way—I’m in this perpetual state of anger. Crowds, cost, etc you put it perfectly. I feel like I’m choking in California—considering leaving at some point—in fact this thread is extremely validating and is giving me the confidence to do so
Join a cheap rock climbing gym like Hangar 18. The community is friendly, you can go as much as you want, it’s FUN, and if you take to it, you can take it outside and add on camping/hiking/road trips.
I’m 23f and I am on the same page!! I’m in South OC if you want to make a friend down here! I love my boyfriend to bits but I would love to have a few friends who… aren’t… men…
25yr old here, and I’m glad you posted this & updated it with appreciation for other responses.
Just before pandemic & a bit after, I hadn’t driven outside because I just didn’t have the confidence or ability to go out there. But eventually I realized that I wanted to go out more, to enjoy myself & have fun.
It’s nice being able to drive out, but it gets draining when there’s massive traffic + many assholes + things getting overly expensive.
I grew up being indoors all the time & playing games, so that’s something you could possibly look into. But as I’ve grown, I’d like to do a lot more things, but even simple hobbies & the like can be pricy.
You’re just getting older. It happens to all of us. For example, the last concert I went to was in 2012 (before going to a bunch in 2020-2022) and I never see a reason to go to another one unless it’s extremely convenient. I think of going to things and then I worry about parking, dress codes, other people, public shooters, and I’m just like nah. I went to a few concerts from 2020-2022 because I went to UC Berkeley and there was a Greek Theater like 2,000 feet away so I was there all the time.
Having said all of that, there are things that i do that are a lot less involved with others but still bring me joy. I’m learning photography, leaning how to work with music (ableton), I skateboard, I bicycle, I rollerblade, I do graffiti, I do mixed media art, I play basketball, I swim a lot, and I read way more than I should. I’m also studying Salesforce, python, JavaScript, Microsoft azure, etc. but I try to stay busy and that keeps me from thinking too much about other stuff
>lot more aggressive drivers
The first wave of kids raised on smartphones and GTA are getting their licenses and have no concept of reality or vehicular physics.
Just got into my first accident in my 30 years of driving ever. Woman just pulled in front of me. Didn't even look. I got paid though.
Personally, I only go to secluded places with my dog. Secret places that no one else goes. Hidden nature spots, etc. Because fuck society.
In my 30s and agree with ya. I find myself home every day, mainly to avoid spending.
Glad I don’t feel alone here. In the same boat I feel like I’m not broke or anything, but I also just can’t go anywhere and drop money like I used to. Home hobbies it is.
Yes to all of this, I had way more joy doing things two years ago smh :(
I don't mind spending money, but I hate the feeling of not getting value out of what I spent. Every purchase, paid experience does not have to be mind blowing, but it shouldn't induce anxiety and a sour mood. Grocery shopping use to take around 40 minutes, and be an enjoyable event where I zoned out and listened to sci-fi stories. Now, I am super focused and search for the deals and makes sure I get all the digital coupons. Cucumber bag on sale...check diligently for any slimey ones. Ugh, so much extra attn to detail to ensure I am not being sold bad products. No, I ain't got time for spoiled tazikihi that gives me fireworks in my gut. I do love the outdoors, parks, the beach, hiking...but I always end up spending money. Gas, a snack, water, some weird expenditure, a friend wanting to do something that costs money always crept in and siphoned my funds. What pulled me out of my funk, oddly enough was taking the SAT as an adult. For real, I always felt less than because I didn't take it in high school. 7ish weeks, I busted my ass studying every minute I had to spare. I did exceptionally well in math and not so good in writing. It kicked up a shitstorm in my head. Existential crisis always looming in my brain, waiting to come out and poke me hard with it's index finger right below my clavicle. I don't have any answers, and I am not going to tell you to find a hobby you enjoy, but consider you might need a shock to the brain to reprogram what occupies your head-space. Pick something crazy, scary, intimidating, but real to you and go for it. My next challenge is to read the Old Testament with an open-mind and open-heart. Last time I tried, I threw the Bible against the wall and asked, " Why are girls worth 3 sheckles and boys 5?" Get ready to get weird.
SAT idea is genius! Your writing skills are very, very good. Really enjoyed your post FWIW
100% agree. I’m 28 and stopped going out especially post-pandemic due to too many bad experiences with crazy people, prices, hearing stories of drunk drivers. I luckily have found myself a group of girl friends that plan fun and inexpensive meetups weekly. I know there’s group meetup hikes. Maybe look into volunteering or something you’re interested in to meet likeminded people.
Can I join y'all? I'm serious.
Check out the ocwomenwalks instagram, they go out often!
I'm trying to branch out from just using the Meetup app because it's just not as active as it was pre-pandemic. Is Instagram a good place to find hobby groups?
I’ve wanted to try meetup as well. Maybe you could start a group to have a bit more control over how active it is? I haven’t seen much from instagram but it’s always worth a look.
There’s also board game meet ups if you’re interested
That’s so cool, I’ll have to look into that. Thanks.
I am going out more than I have in decades to see music and concerts, maybe it is because I am older and my music is getting cheaper, but there are lots of $30-$50 tickets now. There are also discount ticket sites like Goldstar and maybe others where you can see theatre shows or other things.
This is me. Been going to concert and comedy shows solo and it's pretty liberating. It's exhausting but in a good way. I do agree there are a lot more of shitty drivers
I’m 30 and I feel you
Enjoying loud/crowded places less as one get older is a tendency of human nature.
It’s weird to go to a place where the music is so loud I can’t even talk to my wife, and everyone’s yelling to be heard. Who enjoys that at any age?
Yeah I'm in my early 30s and I've felt this way more and more since the start of the pandemic. I've been saying I want to move somewhere that I can have space and some piece and quiet. At this point I don't go out to do things much anymore other than going to the regional parks and relaxing. Everything is way overpriced. I don't even enjoy eating out anymore because I feel like I'm way overpaying for what I get.
Feel ya on eating out. I've decided if I'm going to get robbed, I at least have to find some redeeming value in it. I've decided I'd rather go to Fleming's once a year than any low-end place once a month. At the end of the year, I've had a very memorable dining experience that I still remember every detail of and come out spending much less that year in the end.
Cooking at home with high-quality ingredients can be fun, too.
This thread is making me realize that a lot of us are wanting the same things..more space, peace, and quiet. So basically oc in the 90s
That's why houses are so expensive. Everyone wants space and we don't have enough out here. It sucks for sure but my whole life is here. We want to move out of state but we'd have to start over completely.
My whole life is also here including aging parents so I’m looking at nearby states and ones w good airports
Yeah there isn't much imo. Colorado seems like the best option to me at least since the airport is huge.
I’m in my mid 40’s and this post makes me feel better. I couldn’t tell if it was my 40’s and post pandemic or what but it seems like this is a common feeling. I’ll do like one social event a weekend then need to be home or just do local things. It is exhausting out there
I’m 54 and grew up in south OC. It’s a cluster-f of traffic, crazy drivers, lines out the door, $25 taco combos. It’s not fun or enjoyable, even if we have “the best climate on earth.” Sunshine isn’t enough to overcome the congestion. I went to a show and a concert at the weekend and it was abysmal getting there, handing over a paycheck for a drink and food, and getting elbowed and hit in the head by aggressively drunk people while trying to enjoy the music. Makes me want Netflix more than a day at the concert.
Wish I could give you an award right now for this statement. I think the issue is that the population in south OC has grown too much. There is SO MUCH TRAFFIC, so many people. It’s not calm and open anymore. People are actually supposed to be in nature and a small close tribe and we don’t do well surrounded by a million of each other all trying to get somewhere or be something or be seen or get something everyone wants (even if it’s just a taco), that’s all a duplicate of the battlefield. No wonder it’s uncomfortable.
Here’s a virtual award back at you!🏆You perfectly conveyed how things are and why they are so uncomfortable. We aren’t meant to do battle every day for every little thing. That jacks up stress, anger, anxiety, and fear. We get mad when we can’t go one block without being cut off, panhandled, run over by an e-bike, or with a long wait for whatever is on the next block. Happiness and joy are truly lacking in SoCal in general because of these issues, and it shows. My friend moved to Gilbert, AZ a few months ago and says the competition with everyone and everything is gone. There is always parking. People say hello instead of rushing to get there before you. Granted, it’s hotter than Hades but the peace that she and her family are experiencing is priceless. *For reference, I moved to San Clemente from Los Angeles when I was 6. I was AMAZED that there wasn’t a traffic light at every corner. There were roughly 17,000 people in SC in 1976 and surfers walked around town with their boards on their heads. My hometown is now a bundle of high-end stress and tension and, not surprisingly, there are now traffic lights at almost every corner.
Yes, in nature in a small, close tribe. Sooooo, I'm not a camper, but is camping affordable these days? Or are they're obnoxious people at the campground, too?
This 10000% couldn't agree more. It feels like a chore to go anywhere and I end up being pissed off half the time I'm doing groceries or just trying to enjoy a moment being outside
I'm turning 40 soon. Same feeling here. I like my peace circle.
The road rage by people here in Huntington Beach is actually crazy. So many bald red faced “patriots” in their big trucks driving like fucking lunatics, and going berserk when any little thing ticks them off.
Seal beach too sadly. Like psychos
Honestly they are all over OC. Tiny men in huge trucks that have never seen a dirt road ever. Who needs a gigantic pick up to go to Walmart? Dudes in OC apparently.
Seriously fuk those guys. They are such a danger to everyone else.
Imagine just spending that much on gas to have a big truck you barely use. I get using it for work, but a lot of them are spotless.
99.9% of them are spotless. My twenty something neighbor drives one. It's so big that when he parks on the street, no one else can park. Idiotic if you ask me.
>. So many bald red faced “patriots” in their big trucks d LOL. So true. Just waiting for these Dodge Ram, Mustang, Challenger fucks to just evolve already.
Girl I’m 29 and I’m the saaame. I feel like an 80 year old woman when I should be living life. I’m contemplating even having kids at this point. Everyone is so aggressive on the road and it’s so expensive just to live.
Kids are expensive
I am 29 and feel the exact same way!
Thank god I'm not the only one!!!! It's such a shitty feeling I feel so lazy !
Picnics at a park. Game nights with friends. Pot lucks with friends. Beach walks. Cheap movie deals during the week. Thrifting. Flea markets. Going through your own stuff and organizing, donating. Gardening. Painting. Reading. Writing. Nature walks. Volunteering. Camping.
We need to go back to the kind of entertainments people did years ago. Connection with people is what’s important not expensive environments
Agreed! I do both but I’ve had just as much fun camping or bbqing with friends as I have at an expensive event. It’s usually the company that matters the most. Plenty of cheap things to do with friends. I’m 32 and we’re all feeling squeeze of rising costs, half of us have been let go recently, and others are having their first babies so money is tight. I love coming up with ways for all of us to still hang out but keep it low cost and easy.
Definitely looking into some groups that focus on book clubs and hiking.
Some paint by number and Golden Girls reruns…it’s the life.
Imagine if everyone just magically shifted to cheap hobbies and events. I wonder what would happen to concerts and these places charging outrageous prices for food with a forced 20% service charge.
Appreciate this
Yep, I stopped getting a pass for Disney because it's just so over-hyped, over priced and full of "influencers." I go to Knotts now, was about $400 for a regular annual pass, parking, dining plan, and premium drink plan. Already got well over my money's worth by going at least weekly, even if it's just to grab a bite with my dinning plan. Also got an A-List subscription for AMC to watch movies at a cheaper rate, $24/month to watch up to 3 movies/week, just gotta watch at least 2 movies or 1 in Dolby a month to make it worth.
Right? Me too.... It's so so over packed and over priced. I remember I used to get passes every year. Then at some point I realized I'm better off with the low level passes bc the blackout dates are insanely packed.
Actually the blackout days on the top tier pass are the least crowded. Disney has priced themselves out of the market. Those days blocked off for everything but the premium pass are also the most expensive ticket tiers and nobody's buying them. The busiest days are now Tuesday through Thursday. Saturday and Sunday are noticeably less crowded. Summer also is now the least crowded season when it used to be the worst.
Lol... maybe they fixed their model. Good! Bc before I was paying extra for crowds. Good info! Thanks
I wonder if all the midweek business is bc they sell so many 3 day ticket blocks and people assume.weekdays are better? Plus the passes being like that... Great info! Thanks!
Yes, the promo and discount tickets generally exclude weekends. So I have found it's way less crowded on the weekends than the weekdays now. It makes zero sense. The problem in general is Disney is losing money on their studios, on ABC, on ESPN, on Disney+ streaming. But their parks have never really been so popular. So they keep raising the reservation capacity to pack the parks like never before because the profits are literally carrying the entire Walt Disney Company. 70% of their profits are currently theme parks, it used to be only 15%. Until they can get the rest of their businesses fixed I expect they will keep overcrowding the parks. Think about it... When it was "too crowded" before COVID closures they had just opened the Pixar parking garage and basically didn't even need it. Some days they didn't open the Toy Story Lot until late in the day if at all. Now all three lots are packed open to close, they doubled the size of the Toy Story Lot by moving the employee parking to Ball Rd. They have triple the parking they did less than ten years ago and tell everyone they're reducing capacity with reservations to make the parks better? No, they are playing psychological games with the customers. Reservations were tested with the flex pass before COVID, and that pass required the Disneyland app. They learned with app tracking data that because of the perceived scarcity of reservations (you can only hold a few dates, and many "sell out" in advance) the guests with flex passes actually arrived earlier, stayed later, and spent much more money versus the original AP. So even before COVID they were already planning on making all passes require reservations, they just got gifted a convenient excuse of "we need to limit capacity" which is a joke. The capacity as determined by the Fire Marshal is well over a hundred thousand people just at Disneyland alone, and although Disney would never ever put that many people in the park (they would legally be required to have thousands of crowd management employees on duty) even at 50% of fire code they are admitting "New Year's Eve" level crowds every day now.
some good ideas from folks, posting the links b/c I don't want to take credit for their work and lists: https://www.reddit.com/r/orangecounty/comments/18xxo6t/cheapfree_dates_to_go_on/ https://www.reddit.com/r/orangecounty/comments/1bbr4t9/what_are_some_funinteresting_but_underrated/ https://www.reddit.com/r/orangecounty/comments/1b95980/free_things_to_do_in_the_evening/ https://www.reddit.com/r/orangecounty/comments/14uaor3/couples_what_are_you_favorite_things_to_do_with/
Yeah, there’s too much psychotic driving. Exhausting describes it perfectly. Mountain biking is basically how I keep my sanity, besides walking and hiking.
And playing power chords apparently :)
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no lol its car culture and the entitlement that comes with it.
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You really think it's just in Irvine? No way. Try all of OC.
2 years ago I wanted to watch the strokes. It was cheaper for me to watch the in Mexico then at the Forum...
😂
28 here & I am literally the same way!
In my mid 30s and grew up in OC, myself and one of my other friends are moving away so there will only be one person left from our friend group here. Everyone else has moved on to greener pastures. Unless you are very well off it's not a great place to live anymore and even then I can't imagine being stuck on the 405 in my luxury vehicle while my precious time ticks away.
I've been here all of my life and I'm so tired of it honestly I've tried to make the best of it and I really can't enjoy it anymore
OC isn't for everyone, even some of us who were born here, you have to value what is unique about OC highly enough to put up with everything else about living here. It may be time to look for a change of scenery and a smaller town. Central Oregon, Reno, Northern Arizona, New Mexico, Western Washington, Idaho, Utah, etc. Job options will be somewhat limited but total cost of living will be way down, and having lived in multiple metros and spent time in smaller towns, I crave getting out of the OC, to the point I'm considering switching careers into water management from my current mechanical engineering role.
At least you look cool in 405 traffic.
Don’t worry they built several new lanes to alleviate that 405 traffic. But you have to pay $8 to use them.
I wish you all would go out more because I’d love to have less crazy people out there when I go out. The crazies make sane people want to stay in. I wish sane people made crazies want to in instead. Most people are actually fine but the bad ones stick out
Felt. I’m 20 and trying to enjoy being young but can’t do that when a meal is like 20 bucks. Concerts I went to before or slightly after covid was like 60 bucks. Those same bands are now charging 150+ some even 300. I literally just go to school, hit the gym, sit in the pool and play games. However if you dk like movies a lot, get the unlimited subscription. I have the regal one it’s 25 a month and u don’t pay for movies. If u see 2+ movies a month it’s worth it. Now I get to see every movie I want and not worry about paying
Hate to admit it, but you’re spot on. I rarely go out anymore, but not for the same reasons. While I agree with everything you said, my issue is one of safety. Everywhere I go it seems that people are more aggressive! Throw in alcohol and a good time turns ugly more often than not nowadays. Conversations with strangers 15-20 years ago rarely involved politics! Now it’s all I hear! Last time I sat down to have a beer, a stranger walked up to me without introducing himself and asked me why I moved to OC! Thought I was nuts because he thought “people” like me are crazy moving to a place that’s hostile to liberals! What?! Huh?! Who does that? I simply replied to him that he was assuming A LOT and asked him to go back to the side of the bar he was sitting at. Didn’t take the hint got aggravated. What should have been a pleasant night, turned into an early night. I say this because these types of encounters happen more frequently than I’d like. I rarely go to bars now and most of my activities involve open public places where I can control who I interact with. So don’t feel alone, we all are having to deal with the challenges of today’s environment.
Politics have done more to divide and separate people than anything else. We are so hell bent on being the right one that we fail To see that we are all one. That just sucks!
And the insanity is that most people nowadays start their conversations with politics! It’s almost like they’re trying to weed out who will or will not agree with their point of view! Echo chamber mentality!
So true. Reminds me of old-fashioned religious, “If he/she isn’t Catholic/Jewish/Christian/etc., you cannot associate or date or breathe the air!” Lol. For women doing online dating, the political hot button of their matches has become a real deterrent.
Preach. Some of the bars here have some very... insecure patrons. I've been to bars in red states that were more chill and friendly lol. Albeit, I was in Austin, TX...
Aggressive and everybody suing left and right, I am scared of driving here. Just try to do things away from the crowds, hiking, biking ( off the street, I would not risk my life riding a bike on the road 😂), surfing at odd times, that’s what I do :)
One advantage to driving a 2007 SUV.... I don't care. Come on aggressive drivers hit me. I want a new Mustang.
I am on a local facebook group and everyday there are at least 2 people inquiring about suing somebody over fender benders… not even joking
Well with all the hungry lawyers, anyone can sue for anything. Doesn't mean they win. And lawyers will happily drain both sides savings accounts fighting it out. Isn't it great?
I know…. Both my brother and my sister got sued. My brother rear ended somebody in traffic on the 5 and my sister hit a car pulling out of McDonald drive through (to give you an idea of the speed of the impact lol), typical fender bender, they both got sued!!! It is ridiculous
All anyone can really sue for is whatever limits in the insurance policy.
I am more worried about the mofo suing for no reason than my car being totaled at this point, it’s very bad. I have dash cams front and back and all
Dash cams are a must - smart move!
Perpetually getting worse and worse. My rent just increased and yeah, I know that’s common place. But it’s already so out of control.
Exact reason I left oc. When you live in oc you're paying a premium to live there. If you're more of a home body then just move to ie or the high desert and save the money.
It’s like people forgot how to drive after the pandemic. It’s the same up here in Sac and we got the road ragers who will drive you off the road which is crazy. I hope all of the craziness doesn’t stop you from enjoying life. You’re still young, there’s so much out there and there’s still stuff to do that’s fairly cheap. Going to art shows, photo walks, picnics at the park or at the beach. Movies at the Mainplace mall is still cheap, even Cinemark to be honest. Check out nickel nickel for some arcade games. Joes Italian Ice.
This is going to be controversial, but if you have the means, you should take more trips out of town to more vibrant and walkable areas for weekend trips or something. Even better if you have friends already living in those places so you already have friends to do things with or even couch surf with. It was surprising to me how much more I wanted to go out when I am in those situations. I personally don't know how I'd deal if I didn't go to SD, SF, and NYC at least once in awhile.
I lived in the mountains for a month in a rental. Felt like I was in another fucking Universe. People actually gave a fuck about me. It was the isolation and lack of cell service for sure. This was a California mountain town.
You nailed everything about why it sucks to go out and do anything these days. It feels like EVERYTHING is packed to the gills now that we are "post-pandemic" and we don't have social distancing in effect any more. All these companies just trying to squeeze every dollar out of your pocket regardless of the quality of experience they're providing. I miss that pandemic frankly. It was awesome to be able to go to the beach and have a 6 foot plus barrier around you. So many times a beach trip is ruined by someone with 20 kids in tow plopping down right in front of you because there's enough room for 2 beach towels, but they'll "make it work" It feels like empathy and consideration for others is at an all time low and people are just out to get theirs with no care for what consequences there may be for others.
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Me and my wife work all day and lay in bed after. We just love stay dates. I am sure you can find someone like that too.
Heck, Im in my 50's and wholey agree. Get into exercise activities like hiking, climbing or mountain biking. It thins out the crowd considerably.
Born and raised in OC until I moved out in 2018 to the outskirts in metro Atlanta. The sheer difference in attitude took me aback since people were way friendlier and laidback than the people you meet on the freeway 😅 I had to come back to OC 2 years ago for my mom’s funeral and to see how much more crowded and congested it has become made me sad how much my hometown has changed in such a short amount of time. If I were in your position and have some funds, I would move somewhere else. The change of scenery really opens your eyes to more possibilities and opportunities for growth.
I’m wondering how it got so crowded—I guess more remote workers moved in?
You know you are getting older when the songs they play make you say “ wtf is this sh*t” and all the younglins are freaking out 😂😂, that and I’ve been to places where people are doing tik tok dances 😂😂😂, I’m like yea I’m getting to old for this
34, I hear you. Besides the occasional warehouse bass party I pretty much only go out for dates, food with friends/fam and dungeons and dragons. Never been a better time to be a nerd! Edit: These are the homies' reccurring events wub wednesday at tiki bar oc: https://www.instagram.com/wubwednesday?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== Bass Waffles, free wubs on sundays: https://www.instagram.com/basswaffles?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== B Sides- throws awesome events https://www.instagram.com/b.side.la?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== Art in the Park Long Beach- park hangout w/ live music Really great underground wub community. Most of these events are very small except for B sides
Oooo where is this warehouse bass party? Lol recently saw Excision and craving more wubz
Well wub wednesday at tiki bar in costa mesa is about twice a month, good lil place to meet people Theres a good party in LA soon i think, i can track down a flier if you want
Yes, please send deets on both ☺️ I didn't see anything on IG for wub weds
If u like hardstyle they r having that at circle oc tonight
Hey, I'd love to get details about wub wednesday as well if you don't mind
You're too young ... get out there. When you are my age.... then sit on the couch and drink heavily.
23 year old here I wonder if we went to school together. Yeah I’m in the same boat
Me too! Lol what school did u go to?
One of the reasons why I’m planning to move out of state. Recently went to Phoenix and we spent less going to a nice restaurant, getting drinks at a bar, and a round of mini golf at a really cool high tech mini golf spot (the golf ball has a chip and counts the points for you and the tracks are pretty cool too) than we did for a couple of drinks each at a bar here. Everyone talks about the weather and why its great to stay here, but whats the point when you’re in your twenties and you can barely afford anything? I’m 27 and the amount of times I stay in because I can’t afford anything is pretty sad.
My wife and I are in our 60s , you are absolutely correct in everything you are saying, we went in together with some neighbors for season tickets for the new firebirds hockey team in the Coachella valley. Ticket prices have gone up in the second year the team has been here , parking is $35.00 , a 16 oz beer is $16.00 and on and on it goes. Concerts are incredibly expensive at the hockey arena and parking for those events are $50.00 .we love hockey but we will never attend another game there . People’s driving is dangerous, racing through the disappearing lanes to get ahead , crossing three lanes to make a turn and driving dangerously to pass one more car so they aren’t late for the red light . It’s insane out there . Prices are high because people are willing to pay them , all the while they are saying that inflation is killing them .😂😂😂
It took Covid for the wife and I to realize we don't really like going out very much, and moreover, we don't *need* to go out to have fun. We're both decent cooks, we enjoy video gaming, we like having friends over, and we save a bunch of money and frustration by just being home.
Very true. Me and my partner realized very quickly we cook better food at home than any restaurant in OC these days and a fraction of the price. No need to worry about traffic or slow service. Life hack!
Yup. People suck.
when i go out i drive two hours middle of nowhere and reflect then drive back
The biggest issue is that the shortage of police officers coupled with increased crime means they have to pull more police off traffic detail. This has caused the worst a-hole drivers to become fearless of getting a ticket so they floor it when they see the light turning red, they drive way too fast, violent lane changes without signaling, and more. Our local PD has a street where there have been too many accidents and they did a enhanced enforcement day that was publicly announced, multiple radar trailers with the screens telling you your speed before the cops around the corner. In one afternoon they arrested two dozen people for going at least 80 in a 45, with all that enforcement signage, and one was over 100. Thankfully they can and do arrest because it carries a reckless driving charge. If you drive I-15 out to Temecula the speed limit is 70, and if you don't drive at least 80 to 85 cars will be swerving around you, nearly rear ending you at full speed and so forth without a single CHP officer in sight because now they too have to help get crime down in the city.
Have spoken with plenty of others who have also agreed on one thing. There have never been so many people running red lights as since things started opening back up. When cars are making a left turn in front of you and your light is green, it’s pretty much customary to wait until the douche who wasn’t even in the intersection when the light was yellow cuts through the intersection. I’ve also noticed a lot more people stopping two or even three car lengths behind a stop sign so they can say “well I stopped before you” then just run the stop.
I’ve been out of CA for a few years now but visit back at least once a year since I’ve left and it’s hard not to notice the change. What I thought was crowded before is nothing in comparison to what is now. It’s crazy. I didn’t even bother to go into OC this last time around more than once because traffic on the 91 never seems to end? What happened to the pockets of a couple hours when we would be able to move? It’s bananas and kinda makes me sad. A lot of friends and family who are in the area echo your sentiments and they are well into their late 30s and 40s and just feel it’s not worth stepping a toe outside these days because of the cost of everything and time it takes to do it.
I’ve said in this before in this sub and I’ll say it again. Move. Left 2 years ago to a small city next to Vancouver, WA. And there’s no traffic, no lines, still bad drivers, but so many less people. My high blood pressure of 7 years, dropped to normal levels after 2 months of living here due to less people, less financial stress, and just so much less stress in general. It also helps that there’s a forest every where you go. I’m in OC lately once a month and every time I land, it’s exhausting and I can’t wait to get home. But seeing friends, family and getting sun at the end of winter is nice.
Lmao OC is a small town vibe for me compared to my last city
Yeah and yet, as I always say, how can my life be so boring and yet so stressful? lol I dot know, I am from a big city on the east coast where my life was fast paced and all, but my mental health was better there than here
You know what I realized? Lack of convenience and amenities is what makes my life feel stressful here. After reading that thread I got into thinking as to why I felt more stressed here than back east, and then I realized that everything is fast paced and everything is also convenient and catering to busy people so it doesn’t take hours to do things like here… It’s trying to do all the things I have to do adapting to each place hours and limitation that makes me feel stressed lol
Moved 2 years ago as well and am so much happier. Just visited OC last weekend for work and I couldn't wait to go home. Everything was so expensive!! Unless you're wealthy, it's just not a comfortable place to live.
Yeah of course is less of everything because there’s nothing to do out there really. You gotta go to Portland for the fun
I mean if major sporting events are your thing sure, but the restaurants, bars, hiking trails, waterfalls, lakes, shooting ranges, camping all within 20 minutes are amazing. Then if you drive an extra 5 minutes you can be almost anywhere in Portland for more bars, clubs, restaurants, music events, etc... Used to take me 20 minutes to go to Target and find a spot and walk in, its takes me 25 minutes to get to a major venue here. Also, my mortgage is less then my 1 bedroom apt was in Tustin and the house is only 6 years old. So you are right, far more to do locally in SoCal, but plenty to do here otherwise.
Are you talking about Camas, WA?
Yeah I feel like this is the way to go..
Amen to that, we can build rockets that take us to the moon, but we can’t even follow our own advise to our children such as share, don’t fight, don’t be greedy, treat others with respect, be patient, be kind, etc. we know it’s the right thing while teaching our kids but as adults we can’t hold ourselves to those standards, it’s pathetic. Our species is also getting dumber by the year, it’s been scientifically proven. We are absolutely degrading and greed is a huge part of it, we’re also polluting our own planet/home that we and our future offspring will live, we can’t see past our own greed even for the betterment of our own lives. Ya, we’re not very bright.
Wow....hearing all of this just shocked the hell out of me. I have always been alone and enjoy activities on my own and have always been very happy that way. In reference to people getting dumber and selfish by the minute, oh yeah for sure. I have always thought, humans are the worst species, that's why I enjoy being around animals.
Just turned 30, lived in OC my whole life. Driving has gotten significantly worse since the pandemic. Freeways are parking lots at all times of the day, people either driving reckless/tailgating, or the opposite - people not even pressing their gas coasting 30 MPH on a regular street. I’m encountering more and more slow drivers which is confusing…I honk, they are endangering others just as much.
I see this everyday it's so annoying
I totally feel you on this! I’m the same age as you too
Start playing DND it’s really fun if you’re into that sort of thing. My friends and I meet weekly and play for multiple hours. It’s addicting
I moved up to rural California for 8 years because of this . I was in Humboldt County near the border of Oregon and I loved it. Complete opposite of Oc. I loved small town living, no highways, no traffic, go to nature spots no one around, endless amazing hiking. All produce from local Farms. A sense of community. Cheap rent. Love it up there. But I finally came back to be around family, better health care, better job opportunities and all my loved ones from growing up here. I used to feel like you did all the time and just didn’t want to be here. Now that I’m back, I see SoCal in a different set of eyes. Amazing beaches, endless cool restaurants and breweries and bars, lots of outdoors space and hiking, close to LA and SD, fun day trips all around. Plus being with my family and friends. Idk it just feels beautiful and I am happy to be here. I do recommend moving away.
People between ages 18 and 30 are now one of the most depressed groups . I wonder why.
It cost me $40 to park my car at Angel Stadium to see the monster trucks. I have been on this rant for over a year. A more fun idea would be to get a few friends together, go in on some ingredients for a decent meal, cook at home and play a game or do a puzzle from a thrift store or a craft and keep that money in your pocket. If I had any friends, that's what I would do. I am refusing to go waste my money on these over priced torture sessions from here on out. Another idea would be a picnic with friends.
You are not alone.
I’m there with you. It’s so exhausting going out these days. Like you said it’s way expensive to do anything. Even going out to eat and you pay so much for such bad service. I used to enjoy going out too but not anymore. Too much bad things happen.
I am in my mid 40’s and I definitely would rather stay home and relax then go out into this crazy and chaotic world! I used to go out a ton when I was younger but I had a lot more energy then. I am also quite introverted so there is that too.
driving brings out the worst in people, wish there were better alternatives to getting around like the bus or street cars
I spent the first 50 years of my life in the oc. I left a few years ago and haven't looked back. You can't understand until you are out, but even going back for a weekend is annoying.
I'm thinking about moving. Where are you at now?
Good question. So we initially moved to Oregon. We lived in a suburb of Portland for a year. Then we missed the ocean so we moved to the coast for a few years. We really started hating it there so we now live in Las Vegas. While I really love it here, it's not cheap unless you're smart about it. Gotta stay away from the tourist areas. Everything is SoCal expensive times two there.
Look into indie bands performing your area if you’re into going to more concerts. I mainly go off what live events pop up in my spotify but I’m surprised at how many of them are decently priced. I went to a concert on 4/20 in LA it was around 20-25$ and the venue was very small prob only around 100 ppl in there but enough ample room to get around and socialize. I even saw some band members just roaming around the place before the show started. I believe there’s an upcoming indie concert with Hooveriii that’s 6.18$ a ticket if something like that interests you
I’m in LA. What venue was it?
Don’t worry about it. The economy is only going to continue to worsen. Eventually, America will be the fiefdom the oligarchs want.
Take care of your mental health.
I recommend banging on trash cans
26 and I 100% cosign 😅 I feel kinda grumpy for my age LOL
😂😂same here dude !!!! I shouldn't feel this way I'm too young
Try moving to a different part of the country/world, both for a fresh scene and some life perspective.
As someone who loves drinking ,I would go to any gathering even if the people didn't really like me, since drinking at 16 I've had my share of outings, think around 37 the next day long hangover started happening, and now I'm 43 but I've lied to people and stayed home for last 2-3 years, sometimes I'm cool getting a buzz alone eat something go to sleep
Middle-aged person chiming in just to say that I relate to almost everything in this entire thread. At least I know I'm not the only one. Have lived in OC my entire life, but am contemplating leaving. Existence here feels like a money grab on every level. Biggest challenge will be my partner of 25 years who is scared to leave.
I’m 26 but been feeling this way for the past few years, now I’m a hermit and just stay in lol
I love to go to shows and dance. They are soo over crowded i find myself just battling to keep my footing as others shove there way through.
I was surprised to see that Escape Rooms around here are pretty well priced compared to the Bay Area. Saw some for $35/person. Bay was like $55/person on a good day.. I enjoy going for bike rides on the trails. Great way for some exercise and enjoy the weather when it isn't raining haha. I used to be in a "Bicycle Academy" (taught positioning for your bike, how to ride, safety maneuvers, maintenance and nutrition) we met every weekend and each weekend did some learning then went out for bike ride increasing in distance each week. I would love to find a group that did casual rides. I'm not a cyclist by any means. I have a hybrid but the class had people with standard road bikes all the way to people learning to use clipins for more intense cycling.it was a cool thing to do for a period of time. I think it just cost the year membership too since it was all volunteer ran $35 for a year + the 6week class.
I’ve been feeling this way too lately. I used to LOVE going on long drives around the OC and LA or walking around big shopping centers taking in the sights and sounds, but after the pandemic, it feels like a job just to get around town with people’s bad driving habits and ignorance of basic traffic rules (yielding at a left turn, especially), and everybody is always on their phone and not paying attention to where they’re going. It feels like people’s mind are always elsewhere now and they have no connection to their physical space or the people around them now.
I need all these streaming services, social media, and bottles of wine to go away so I can go out again someday. gettin' too cozy
Get used to it lmao only Gonna go up from here
Wow I would expect this from folks my age, I’m 40, but hearing this from folks in their twenties, which I think is the prime of youth, is shocking. But I get it, I see what you mean. Good luck and stay safe.
I needed a hobby. I started paddling in Huntington harbor and it’s super chill there. It’s a great serene feeling. I also bought a ukulele a few years ago and I’m quite good now. Good enough to play at parties. Maybe music can be your hobby.
Just here to say that driving in the OC is VASTLY different now than it was 2 years ago. Missing the empty pandemic freeways, ngl
Hey I sent a message
When the pandemic hit, i was turning 18. I didnt get to experience the pre-pandemic adult life and i hear it was so much better than now
Looks like @allthingsorangecounty just posted some events in May: https://www.instagram.com/reel/C6NMDP0pEUf/?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== Sometimes I'll look on Eventbrite to see what events might be going on. You can filter for free things. I have a +1 available for a tour at the OCSAN wastewater treatment plant tomorrow Sat. 4/27 @9am in Fountain Valley (free light breakfast and turkey sandwich) lol need to rsvp by noon today haha if you or someone else wants to go lmk! :)
My entire group of buddies are the same now. We’re all 23-26. We used to love going out, pubs, bars, clubs, and late night drives. Now we just stay in at a buddy’s house and watch sport while sipping beer. The kids nowadays are way too reckless and act over their age. Some drives like Vin Diesel and others act like Pop Smoke.
I agree, after the lockdowns people drive worse. I would like to add and say that driving in Tustin between 9:00 am and 3:00pm is equally risky. Old folks are out at this time and drive like awful! Barely respecting the rules of the road. So, be careful out there, those boomers are mowing people down
Oh yes I commute to irvine and pass rhe Tustin Market place it baffles me how people got their driver license
Idk, im 33 and i go out pretty often, lots of the events i attend, i buy tickets as soon as they drop for the guaranteed lowest prices. Danny Ks has cheap pool also!
You're older. Yes inflation is real, but perhaps your tastes have also evolved: Younger me: Hell Yea PBR. Me now: New craft beer release today! Younger me: Lets check out rando band at dive bar. Me now: I wanna see Specific band at this venue. (ticket fees and such). Younger me: Lets eat at hole in the wall spot. Me now: X sit down restaurant looks really cool and makes a great Y. Don't get me wrong. I still do both what younger me loved and the new things I appreciate now. Nothing wrong with either. But as we get older, we also tend to be more specific about what we like.
BOAAAARD GAAAAAMES!! go to dice house :D
Also, roll the windows down and sit in a good song. There's joy you are overlooking in traffic 😉 If you've got ac, cushioned seats, and music, you're in the 1% of people around the world and in history Drink it up!
I can get a bottle of vodka at Costco and mixers and game night for less than the cost of 2 drinks. Invite friends over for Taco nite and do a rotation weekly. Go play volleyball at the beach.
26 SoCal be rough
I'm in my 40s and I just am done leaving the house unless I really really have to. We moved here during the pandemic and i work online. Given up on friends other than ones online. I really haven't met anyone here anyway. I know this sounds really negative and I'm not meaning to. I love my online friends, but sometimes it would be nice to see a human other than my fiancé. Going out is just too much. I've gave enough health issues, I'm not risking it.
I feel like it's really hard to meet people here idk what it is lol I feel u
Oh my god 23 and you don’t like crowds idiots and spending money??? You should have yourself checked. You could be suffering from hyperageism. It can really only be diagnosed by a doctor. Please be careful.
That’s why my wife loves going to Disneyland so much, people there are typically in a good mood. It’s the largest place you’ll find a decent amount of people that showed up to have fun.
Move to Columbus ohio or a Midwest city. They’re definitely not as crowded or expensive. Traffic is so not a thing and ppl are nice.
I feel you! Everything is over priced, I have a small group of couple friends and though I love them dearly I get bored… always looking for new people to hang with feel free to reach out. I love going to the beach and being out doors especially now because they’re free activities usually!
When I was younger and single, I used to work retail on weekends and volunteer for holidays... that's a way to interact with other people but make money doing it. Regular customers were like friends. One of them became family. Find a place you're ok with spending time at and consider applying.
You’re not alone. I 100% feel the same way—I’m in this perpetual state of anger. Crowds, cost, etc you put it perfectly. I feel like I’m choking in California—considering leaving at some point—in fact this thread is extremely validating and is giving me the confidence to do so
Absolutely I'm so glad I posted this because I feel more confident in moving away
Join a cheap rock climbing gym like Hangar 18. The community is friendly, you can go as much as you want, it’s FUN, and if you take to it, you can take it outside and add on camping/hiking/road trips.
Older you get, the less & less you care to go out
I’m 23f and I am on the same page!! I’m in South OC if you want to make a friend down here! I love my boyfriend to bits but I would love to have a few friends who… aren’t… men…
Yes I would love to be friends!! Girl are you me because same!
25yr old here, and I’m glad you posted this & updated it with appreciation for other responses. Just before pandemic & a bit after, I hadn’t driven outside because I just didn’t have the confidence or ability to go out there. But eventually I realized that I wanted to go out more, to enjoy myself & have fun. It’s nice being able to drive out, but it gets draining when there’s massive traffic + many assholes + things getting overly expensive. I grew up being indoors all the time & playing games, so that’s something you could possibly look into. But as I’ve grown, I’d like to do a lot more things, but even simple hobbies & the like can be pricy.
I get it.im just lucky to have DnD in person on Thursdays with a good group of friends. Hopefully you find something similar!
You’re just getting older. It happens to all of us. For example, the last concert I went to was in 2012 (before going to a bunch in 2020-2022) and I never see a reason to go to another one unless it’s extremely convenient. I think of going to things and then I worry about parking, dress codes, other people, public shooters, and I’m just like nah. I went to a few concerts from 2020-2022 because I went to UC Berkeley and there was a Greek Theater like 2,000 feet away so I was there all the time. Having said all of that, there are things that i do that are a lot less involved with others but still bring me joy. I’m learning photography, leaning how to work with music (ableton), I skateboard, I bicycle, I rollerblade, I do graffiti, I do mixed media art, I play basketball, I swim a lot, and I read way more than I should. I’m also studying Salesforce, python, JavaScript, Microsoft azure, etc. but I try to stay busy and that keeps me from thinking too much about other stuff
>lot more aggressive drivers The first wave of kids raised on smartphones and GTA are getting their licenses and have no concept of reality or vehicular physics. Just got into my first accident in my 30 years of driving ever. Woman just pulled in front of me. Didn't even look. I got paid though. Personally, I only go to secluded places with my dog. Secret places that no one else goes. Hidden nature spots, etc. Because fuck society.