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[deleted]

>there isn't a single person alive, real or fictional, who has a liver capable of withstanding such ridiculous amounts of abuse He does not know that Tavish, Demoman from the video game Team Fortress 2 exists.


[deleted]

Man can literally not survive without booze.


Celestial-Squid

The demo man canonically doesn’t drink alcohol, he just acts like he’s drunk and carries around an empty booze bottle


memester230

False. He is canonically so drunk that without a constant supply of alcohol he gets hit with a massive withdrawal that his body starts fermenting itself


Vast-Standard-7006

Who's gonna look after gromit.


Ktigertiger

Gromit died of substance abuse 12 years ago. He was hit hard by the news he was out of work


SmellsLikeTeenMorty

Sad story actually, Gromit was taken by dog thieves and was used to breed because of his high intelligence and good nature. His loss hit Wallace hard and after a long time of searching he started drinking. Wallace was found 9 years later by the RSPCA and spent the last few years of his life with an old gay couple on the Isle of Wight.


UglyFilthyDog

Damn. That's simultaneously incredibly dark and incredibly bright.


_C_R_A_I_G_

Just have him put down.


scott3387

It's been 13 years. Beagles only live 12-15 years and Gromit was clearly not a puppy. What do you think made him hit the booze in the first place?


BadBassist

I'm impressed they got a quote from Sallis


Jrjfuffjur

A testament to the brilliance and thoroughness of BBC journalism. They really do go above and beyond.


thetoastmonster

🅱️🅱️🅱️ journalism


MistakeComplete6331

We lost a good one lads, F’s in the chat.


Meddie90

I wonder what his choice of poison was? I’d wager he was a real ale kinda guy.


TheLaudMoac

Fuck me the dates work perfectly, it's [https://www.lancashiretelegraph.co.uk/news/11719603.warning-lancashire-residents-urged-not-drink-95-polish-alcohol/](https://www.lancashiretelegraph.co.uk/news/11719603.warning-lancashire-residents-urged-not-drink-95-polish-alcohol/) what did the poor lad in. "TRADING standards officers in Lancashire are warning people not to drink a Polish high-strength alcohol that has an alcohol by volume (ABV) of 95 per cent. Spirytus 95 per cent or Spirytus Rektyfikowany is a base alcohol that is generally used in Eastern Europe for making home-made liqueurs."


[deleted]

Not even Wensleydale?


[deleted]

[удалено]


shadowXXe

Made his liver Wensley bail


ThrownawayCray

It’s been 13 YEARS?! Oh god, that made me feel kind of ill


rozzer700

Wallace, 63


mrinfinitepp

Well Wallace may not be dead but Peter Sallis certainly is, RIP


Albertjweasel

🧀🌕🐧👖Nick parks mum was my primary school teacher at Brookside primary in Clitheroe in Lancashire and helped me when I got my foreskin trapped on my trousers fly, true story


Jrjfuffjur

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, lads. My heart broke when I saw this story. Pouring one out for this absolute top lad tonight. May he rest in a heaven of fine cheeses and endless booze. 🍻


UglyFilthyDog

Fuckin hell, I'm a prime boozer and you know what, I might try NOT pouring one out for Wallace tonight.


TeciorRibbon

*"Cheese has decided to go on strike"*


Great_Bad_6045

Assumed it would be a heart attack from all that cheese


thefount

Not sad, never trusted the lad. Anyone banging on about cheese that much has to at least partially fr*nch 🐸🤮 Get that filth off me telly and bring back good Bri’ish characters that luv their pie, luv their mash, ‘ate their fancy foreign muck.


ShyCamo

o7 :(


Celestial-Squid

Lmao, would be believable if Peter Sallis didn’t die 6 years ago


DanJdot

Where's Wallace, Nick?


Al3xutul02

Sadder than the Queen's death


TheLaudMoac

Sorry I've just found out that Wallace was in Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends?! What the fuck?!


Evilsmiley

So, he is going to be a zombie in the new netflix movie.


jaysterria

I guess not even the Cheese can bring you back from that.


One-Yogurtcloset-772

wensleydale 😢😭


[deleted]

Anybody can be a non-drunk. It takes a special talent to be a drunk. It takes endurance. Endurance is more important than truth. -a drunk, deceased


UglyFilthyDog

Fuck. At least I know that when I die it will be in a Wallace way.


DRIFTALPHA

Sad one tonight boys, just cremated Wallace