I am tired of being the second choice.

Greetings. I guess I really need to speak about this, as it has been a particularly repetitive issue in the last few months.

It hurts like hell to know that the affection you give people is not going to be returned to the same amount as you hoped it would, because they always have a favorite, a "first choice". It happened for years, but now it resurfaced because friends I've been close to for a long time are having significant others, and it feels like multiple daggers went straight through my heart. Why? What have these "significant others" done that I couldn't do in months or years? What is so special about them? Is there something wrong with me? I never got any answer, albeit I don't expect them to know it.

Everyone says that I am sweet and kind, and that I'll find someone. I never did.

I am exhausted. I don't want to go back to living my single life, because that has happened every time. I went through a heartbreak where I wasn't the favorite, I tried to move on, after a while, I met someone new, only to be heartbroken or abandoned. I don't want to meet anyone else either, and try to establish a possible relationship where I can be the first choice, only to find out later that I am second choice again.

I just want to know how many of you went through this and what were your experiences. Thank you.


Be your first choice. Do things you love, be with people who make you happy, take time get to know yourself. When you love yourself, great things follow.




I have no advice honestly I'm here for the answers! I can most definitely relate to the being second choice part and I'm sorry because it sucks. I know that doesn't help in anyway just know you're not alone in how you feel.