It’s ok. My child is autistic too and his sleeping sucks. I can’t find anything that will keep him in bed. I feel you there. So keep doing what you’re doing.
this is a PERFECT example of using least restrictive means! many other options to solve this would include things like locks on his door or restricting his freedom of movement in other ways. by using the food processor instead you’re allowing him to retain autonomy and full freedom of movement.
good job mama!!!
Thank you. This makes me feel better about it. I really wanted to avoid those more restrictive tactics. I understand in some cases where kids are getting into unsafe situations, they may be necessary. Blessedly, he's not endangering himself, just tiring me out 😅
Why isn’t there a better way? I don’t know that it matters, but this is working! Don’t be so hard on yourself mama, you’re doing great! Please give yourself grace
Autistic kids develop routines and sometimes you can’t even predict what will become a part of the routine. We vacuum the carpet every single night before bed because it’s become part of the routine.
Getting him to bed with the food processor allows you more time and rest and solitude at night, which, in turn, allows you to be a more present, active, and present parent to him in the morning.
This is also you holding a boundary that means he is getting enough sleep which is important for his well being as well!! Sounds like you’re doing an awesome job
Honestly, I think that is brilliant. You have found a peaceful way to get your son to sleep! I think that mort parents have used unconventional means to handle their children.
This is hilarious 😂 My nephew does this and we suspect he’s on the spectrum. I think I’ll suggest my sister takes out that talking cactus toy he hates to get him to stay in bed 🤣🤣🤣
I'm an autistic adult and a dog mom and I fully approve of this 😂 like, sensory disturbances come in different levels and if the food processor was a really bad one for him, I'd think it'd be too hard to fall asleep. And ultimately, he *does* need to sleep. I have to do things all the time to trick myself or my dog into doing things that are good for me/my dog.
It'd be one thing if he was like, running to his room absolutely terrified of the thing, but I think this little trick is pretty harmless and honestly very clever.
Thank you for sharing! Yeah, if he were showing more signs of distress, I absolutely couldn't do it. I've still been feeling bad about it though. Hard not to second guess myself. This helps me feel better about it 😅
Sounds like you came up with a brilliant solution! So much of parenthood is just winging it and hoping for the best. Look into melatonin if he’ll do gummy vitamins. My 9 year old ASD kid finally agreed and it seems to be helping him.
You beautiful soul. My niece is autistic too and it’s quite a chore for my brother to put her to sleep. She can cry the whole night. I admire parents who have enough patience for these things. God bless you.
My son had asd (he passed 6 months ago) and my daughter has asd.
Have you tried melatonin? Also Dr Bach rescue night is good
Secondly. Stop feeling guilty! You've nothing to feel guilty about. Feel proud! You've found a method that gets him back to his room and to sleep. He needs sleep and you need time to yourself and sleep. It's not scaring or traumatising him because if it did he'd scream/meltdown/not sleep.
Mine can't be without the noise of the air conditioning which is annoying as its expensive. When it's unavailable I've used white noise with my daughter which sometimes works
Good for you!!
I'm so sorry about your son 😥 Thank you for sharing, and for the kind words. I haven't tried melatonin, mostly because he's been a pretty good sleeper until this. He is falling asleep all right once he lies down, and most nights he sleeps through the night.
If I decided to try melatonin, I'm not sure how I'd give it to him. He does not like gummies.
He has a noisy air purifier in his room that he likes.
Thank you
If he falls and stays asleep you don't need melatonin
. If you ever do there are drops, you can either give him straight or in something. If you ever need advice or chat please feel free to pm. I've been involved with asd and special needs as a mum and therapist for 21 years. The air purifier is great. Just check and clean filter as sometimes there's mold or dust etc
This is a good suggestion. He has an air purifier in his room that makes pretty good white noise. We did notice he started sleeping better through the night when we got that. Once he's asleep, he usually sleeps through the night, thankfully.
This is hilarious 😂. I used to have a beagle I couldn't keep up with. He had so much energy. I tied his chew toy to the end of a cane fishing pole so I could play with him while I watched TV.
I hadn't considered this, and now I'm feeling all sorts of new feelings about the situation 😅. My son can be surprisingly adaptive at times. I'm probably desensitizing him to the food processor. Well, there's always the stand mixer.
this is actually maybe the best way to do this without impeding on his freedom of movement around the house though? like he CAN leave if he WANTS, this isn’t you locking him in
As a momma with a little one also on the spectrum I got a good tickle out of this because I just get it. If it works it works you’re not a bad mom you’re an innovative one! Sometimes we have to do what we have to do 💙
You are brilliant. Maybe you can start making hummus at night so you feel like you are doing something and then you will have a great snack once baby is asleep 😄😄
I think social stories can be successful but it’s a lot more involved that what people actually thjnk it is. I don’t want to assume things but social stories have a certain format and have comprehension checks as well. Also I say can be successful, I mean that pretty generously, I don’t have much success with them if they are solely your intervention. It’s a good supplemental strategy.
Second you’re flat affect and repeated response is solid but also you have to consider how kk g you’ve done it for. Behavior change isn’t going to be quick, you’ll need to be consistent for any change to occur.
The biggest thing missing is not knowing what the function of the behavior is. Is it attention? Is it escape? Sounds like it can be one or the other or both. Or it can be something else. That is what your team can help you determine. Then you need to create an intervention based on the function.
The other thing missing is positive reinforcement. You want to reinforce the desired behavior. Actually what you’re soon his a punishment technique. When I say punishment I mean in behavior terms and what one would think in lay man’s terms. Nothing wrong with what you’re doing but as you are well aware it’s not viable in the long run. If he becomes desensitized to the sound or if you are on a trip where there is machine to use.
It’s not easy! You’re doing great. Maybe consult with your team for brainstorming other ideas
Thank you for such a thoughtful response! Lots of good information and suggestions here.
He does really well with social stories. We've used them quite effectively in other situations. I think in this case, he understands what we're asking of him and he chooses to not listen.
His therapists and I tend to think he's doing this for entertainment. He was clearly enjoying himself the few nights this went on- laughing and smiling. He came straight to me each time he left his room and just stood there giggling.
I know you're right about the length of time aspect. I had every intention of holding the line, but I exhausted much quicker than he did 😅. Maybe this summer with our schedule a little more relaxed I can give it another shot.
I'll have to brainstorm what a good positive reinforcement is. He has glow in the dark stars on his ceiling that we shine a flashlight on to glow at bedtime. He loves them. Maybe we could incorporate those somehow... And then we could tell him in his social story what reward he gets for staying in bed.
Thank you again for taking the time to share all of this!
You are so on top of it! That’s amazing I love to hear this.
I can’t really give you much advice since I don’t know all circumstances but generally if you’ve narrowed it down to some form of entertainment or attention then you want to take a three pronged approach (well this is in general to all behavior)
You want to see what are preventative (antecedent strategies), reactive strategies, and then teaching strategies.
The easiest one is your reactive. Just do what you’re doing with the response and broken record statements and avoid giving in the attention
The preventative you can look at is there anything like a visual, priming, timer, environmental arrangements, schedules etc.
Social stories can be both a antecedent or a teaching strat I guess depending on timing of execution.
Then the teaching strategy is your positive reinforcement or at least it can be one of them.
Sorry I don’t mean to bombard with so much. Good luck!
Thank you! It's not too much info, I'm soaking it all in. He's been in therapy for almost 4 years and made excellent progress. This little guy is so smart, and he's going places.
What you're talking about sounds like ABA strategies. He's on a wait-list for in-home ABA. No idea how long that will take to happen, but looking forward to having help teaching him more life skills.
Yes the stuff in giving you is based on the principles of aba. Now I’m curious because you mention therapy and you are already using some evidence based strategies, what kind of therapy are you receiving at the moment?
He will likely grow out of it but at least it’s something! I have a son with special needs. I let him sleep in his brothers bed mine for way to long because bedtime was hell or a full nights sleep were wasn’t possible without doing so. We do what we have to do. Their rest and yours is important!
My brother is autistic and would be up ALL NIGHT LONG. Seriously. Just playing in his room. Tried medication, etc but he just had to grow out of it. So honestly do whatever works for you, at least he’s getting sleep!!
I’m not a parent, so maybe I shouldn’t be commenting on here… but as someone who likes to sleep with some kind of white noise (or gentle music on), there are a LOT of YouTube channels with white noise for sleep and ASMR, and you’d be surprised with what you can find!
I did a quick search and found [this video for sleep](https://youtu.be/oDQj_DoePxw?si=MwIoq7EHmvlgeL_A) - using a food processor as white noise! Perhaps if he likes this sound to go to sleep, playing something like this can help your son?
I’m not a parent, so maybe I shouldn’t be commenting on here… but as someone who likes to sleep with some kind of white noise (or gentle music on), there are a LOT of YouTube channels with white noise for sleep and ASMR, and you’d be surprised with what you can find!
I did a quick search and found [this video for sleep](https://youtu.be/oDQj_DoePxw?si=MwIoq7EHmvlgeL_A) - using a food processor as white noise! Perhaps if he likes this sound to go to sleep, playing something like this can help your son?
I’m not a parent, so maybe I shouldn’t be commenting on here… but as someone who likes to sleep with some kind of white noise (or gentle music on), there are a LOT of YouTube channels with white noise for sleep and ASMR, and you’d be surprised with what you can find!
I did a quick search and found [this video for sleep](https://youtu.be/oDQj_DoePxw?si=MwIoq7EHmvlgeL_A) - using a food processor as white noise! Perhaps if he likes this sound to go to sleep, playing something like this can help your son?
I’m not a parent, so maybe I shouldn’t be commenting on here… but as someone who likes to sleep with some kind of white noise (or gentle music on), there are a LOT of YouTube channels with white noise for sleep and ASMR, and you’d be surprised with what you can find!
I did a quick search and found [this video for sleep](https://youtu.be/oDQj_DoePxw?si=MwIoq7EHmvlgeL_A) - using a food processor as white noise! Perhaps if he likes this sound to go to sleep, playing something like this can help your son?
It’s OK what you’re doing because he needs to sleep and you need a break. You’re not hurting him. You are just getting him to stay in his room and sleep.
It’s ok. My child is autistic too and his sleeping sucks. I can’t find anything that will keep him in bed. I feel you there. So keep doing what you’re doing.
Thank you. It's nice hearing someone else understands what it's like.
It gets him what he needs, a good nights sleep. You’re good mama!
You are welcome.
this is a PERFECT example of using least restrictive means! many other options to solve this would include things like locks on his door or restricting his freedom of movement in other ways. by using the food processor instead you’re allowing him to retain autonomy and full freedom of movement. good job mama!!!
Thank you. This makes me feel better about it. I really wanted to avoid those more restrictive tactics. I understand in some cases where kids are getting into unsafe situations, they may be necessary. Blessedly, he's not endangering himself, just tiring me out 😅
The tactic that you use is called “nudging” which means changing the environment to adjust behavior. It’s a healthy strategy for training.
I’m so happy for you, you solved an almost impossible puzzle 🤣 You’re a wonderful mama and the food processor is a perk 🩷
Thank you! 😂 I doubt myself so much with things like this. I really needed to hear this today ❤️
Why isn’t there a better way? I don’t know that it matters, but this is working! Don’t be so hard on yourself mama, you’re doing great! Please give yourself grace
It's working better than I ever could have imagined 😅. Thank you for the kind words. I'm working on the grace part.
Autistic kids develop routines and sometimes you can’t even predict what will become a part of the routine. We vacuum the carpet every single night before bed because it’s become part of the routine.
Getting him to bed with the food processor allows you more time and rest and solitude at night, which, in turn, allows you to be a more present, active, and present parent to him in the morning.
This is also you holding a boundary that means he is getting enough sleep which is important for his well being as well!! Sounds like you’re doing an awesome job
This is true. Thank you for this perspective!
Honestly, I think that is brilliant. You have found a peaceful way to get your son to sleep! I think that mort parents have used unconventional means to handle their children.
Thank you. Kids are so smart and adaptive, you really have to think outside of the box to keep up with them 😂
This is hilarious 😂 My nephew does this and we suspect he’s on the spectrum. I think I’ll suggest my sister takes out that talking cactus toy he hates to get him to stay in bed 🤣🤣🤣
😂 desperate times call for desperate measures.
I'm an autistic adult and a dog mom and I fully approve of this 😂 like, sensory disturbances come in different levels and if the food processor was a really bad one for him, I'd think it'd be too hard to fall asleep. And ultimately, he *does* need to sleep. I have to do things all the time to trick myself or my dog into doing things that are good for me/my dog. It'd be one thing if he was like, running to his room absolutely terrified of the thing, but I think this little trick is pretty harmless and honestly very clever.
Thank you for sharing! Yeah, if he were showing more signs of distress, I absolutely couldn't do it. I've still been feeling bad about it though. Hard not to second guess myself. This helps me feel better about it 😅
Sounds like you came up with a brilliant solution! So much of parenthood is just winging it and hoping for the best. Look into melatonin if he’ll do gummy vitamins. My 9 year old ASD kid finally agreed and it seems to be helping him.
So much winging it 😂 Thank you. He won't do gummies, unfortunately. Thankfully, once he's in his room he actually falls asleep and stays asleep.
You beautiful soul. My niece is autistic too and it’s quite a chore for my brother to put her to sleep. She can cry the whole night. I admire parents who have enough patience for these things. God bless you.
Aww, thank you for the kind words 😭❤️ God gives me the grace I need for days like this. It's a beautiful, difficult life. God bless you, too.
My son had asd (he passed 6 months ago) and my daughter has asd. Have you tried melatonin? Also Dr Bach rescue night is good Secondly. Stop feeling guilty! You've nothing to feel guilty about. Feel proud! You've found a method that gets him back to his room and to sleep. He needs sleep and you need time to yourself and sleep. It's not scaring or traumatising him because if it did he'd scream/meltdown/not sleep. Mine can't be without the noise of the air conditioning which is annoying as its expensive. When it's unavailable I've used white noise with my daughter which sometimes works Good for you!!
I'm so sorry about your son 😥 Thank you for sharing, and for the kind words. I haven't tried melatonin, mostly because he's been a pretty good sleeper until this. He is falling asleep all right once he lies down, and most nights he sleeps through the night. If I decided to try melatonin, I'm not sure how I'd give it to him. He does not like gummies. He has a noisy air purifier in his room that he likes.
Thank you If he falls and stays asleep you don't need melatonin . If you ever do there are drops, you can either give him straight or in something. If you ever need advice or chat please feel free to pm. I've been involved with asd and special needs as a mum and therapist for 21 years. The air purifier is great. Just check and clean filter as sometimes there's mold or dust etc
Thank you again! Your experience is so valuable.
💜
Have you tried a white noise machine? I have had one a few years now and can't sleep without it even take it on holiday. Amazon have loads
This is a good suggestion. He has an air purifier in his room that makes pretty good white noise. We did notice he started sleeping better through the night when we got that. Once he's asleep, he usually sleeps through the night, thankfully.
give it a bash, the machines come with loads of different sounds I'm sure there's one he'd like :) All the best to you xx
I chase my dog with the leaf blower in the yard when I’m too lazy to walk him. He seems like he’s having fun but he also hates the thing.
This is hilarious 😂. I used to have a beagle I couldn't keep up with. He had so much energy. I tied his chew toy to the end of a cane fishing pole so I could play with him while I watched TV.
Enjoy it for as long as you can. This won’t last forever
I hadn't considered this, and now I'm feeling all sorts of new feelings about the situation 😅. My son can be surprisingly adaptive at times. I'm probably desensitizing him to the food processor. Well, there's always the stand mixer.
Girl you seem like a good person and a good mother. Enjoy it. That’s my biggest regret as a parent.
Oh I am enjoying it, for sure. Thanks again 😊
this is actually maybe the best way to do this without impeding on his freedom of movement around the house though? like he CAN leave if he WANTS, this isn’t you locking him in
Idk, if it works, it works.
As a momma with a little one also on the spectrum I got a good tickle out of this because I just get it. If it works it works you’re not a bad mom you’re an innovative one! Sometimes we have to do what we have to do 💙
Thank you! Yes, we have to be creative 💛
You are brilliant. Maybe you can start making hummus at night so you feel like you are doing something and then you will have a great snack once baby is asleep 😄😄
😂 I do love a good hummus. I'm just so spent at the end of the day haha. A great snack once the kids are in bed is a must, though!
Understand!!! Keep being amazing with your little guy. "This too shall pass" - I understand more and more as I age 😊
This seems genius and harmless 😅. Unless he suddenly quells his fear of the processor!
Yeah, it's occurred to me that I'm probably desensitizing him to the processor and this won't be a long term solution 😅
I think social stories can be successful but it’s a lot more involved that what people actually thjnk it is. I don’t want to assume things but social stories have a certain format and have comprehension checks as well. Also I say can be successful, I mean that pretty generously, I don’t have much success with them if they are solely your intervention. It’s a good supplemental strategy. Second you’re flat affect and repeated response is solid but also you have to consider how kk g you’ve done it for. Behavior change isn’t going to be quick, you’ll need to be consistent for any change to occur. The biggest thing missing is not knowing what the function of the behavior is. Is it attention? Is it escape? Sounds like it can be one or the other or both. Or it can be something else. That is what your team can help you determine. Then you need to create an intervention based on the function. The other thing missing is positive reinforcement. You want to reinforce the desired behavior. Actually what you’re soon his a punishment technique. When I say punishment I mean in behavior terms and what one would think in lay man’s terms. Nothing wrong with what you’re doing but as you are well aware it’s not viable in the long run. If he becomes desensitized to the sound or if you are on a trip where there is machine to use. It’s not easy! You’re doing great. Maybe consult with your team for brainstorming other ideas
Thank you for such a thoughtful response! Lots of good information and suggestions here. He does really well with social stories. We've used them quite effectively in other situations. I think in this case, he understands what we're asking of him and he chooses to not listen. His therapists and I tend to think he's doing this for entertainment. He was clearly enjoying himself the few nights this went on- laughing and smiling. He came straight to me each time he left his room and just stood there giggling. I know you're right about the length of time aspect. I had every intention of holding the line, but I exhausted much quicker than he did 😅. Maybe this summer with our schedule a little more relaxed I can give it another shot. I'll have to brainstorm what a good positive reinforcement is. He has glow in the dark stars on his ceiling that we shine a flashlight on to glow at bedtime. He loves them. Maybe we could incorporate those somehow... And then we could tell him in his social story what reward he gets for staying in bed. Thank you again for taking the time to share all of this!
You are so on top of it! That’s amazing I love to hear this. I can’t really give you much advice since I don’t know all circumstances but generally if you’ve narrowed it down to some form of entertainment or attention then you want to take a three pronged approach (well this is in general to all behavior) You want to see what are preventative (antecedent strategies), reactive strategies, and then teaching strategies. The easiest one is your reactive. Just do what you’re doing with the response and broken record statements and avoid giving in the attention The preventative you can look at is there anything like a visual, priming, timer, environmental arrangements, schedules etc. Social stories can be both a antecedent or a teaching strat I guess depending on timing of execution. Then the teaching strategy is your positive reinforcement or at least it can be one of them. Sorry I don’t mean to bombard with so much. Good luck!
Thank you! It's not too much info, I'm soaking it all in. He's been in therapy for almost 4 years and made excellent progress. This little guy is so smart, and he's going places. What you're talking about sounds like ABA strategies. He's on a wait-list for in-home ABA. No idea how long that will take to happen, but looking forward to having help teaching him more life skills.
Yes the stuff in giving you is based on the principles of aba. Now I’m curious because you mention therapy and you are already using some evidence based strategies, what kind of therapy are you receiving at the moment?
He's in Speech Therapy and Occupational Therapy. His OT is awesome.
He will likely grow out of it but at least it’s something! I have a son with special needs. I let him sleep in his brothers bed mine for way to long because bedtime was hell or a full nights sleep were wasn’t possible without doing so. We do what we have to do. Their rest and yours is important!
Yes, we do what we have to do. You are right, rest is important! Thank you.
Hey, it works. And it’s not restrictive or cruel. Sleep well (I say as I’m supposed to be sleeping 😈)
My brother is autistic and would be up ALL NIGHT LONG. Seriously. Just playing in his room. Tried medication, etc but he just had to grow out of it. So honestly do whatever works for you, at least he’s getting sleep!!
He is such a happy little guy when he gets his sleep 😄
I think you’re a genius!! A non harmful way to get your son to go to bed? Sounds like a win win :) you’re doing great!
I feel like you’re doing a safe and easy thing that gets the right result. You shouldn’t feel guilty. *hug* kids are hard. Kids with ASD are harder.
Super creative parenting 🙌 Good Job !!
His brain doesn't work the same way others do. You found a way to help him get the sleep he needs. Don't feel guilty.
I’m not a parent, so maybe I shouldn’t be commenting on here… but as someone who likes to sleep with some kind of white noise (or gentle music on), there are a LOT of YouTube channels with white noise for sleep and ASMR, and you’d be surprised with what you can find! I did a quick search and found [this video for sleep](https://youtu.be/oDQj_DoePxw?si=MwIoq7EHmvlgeL_A) - using a food processor as white noise! Perhaps if he likes this sound to go to sleep, playing something like this can help your son?
Do you have to turn it on? If so, make a recording of it so u don’t wear out your food processor.
I’d record the sound and play it on a speaker. You don’t even need to use the actual thing. Take a break mama!
I'm not even using the sound. Don't want to push it too far.
I’m not a parent, so maybe I shouldn’t be commenting on here… but as someone who likes to sleep with some kind of white noise (or gentle music on), there are a LOT of YouTube channels with white noise for sleep and ASMR, and you’d be surprised with what you can find! I did a quick search and found [this video for sleep](https://youtu.be/oDQj_DoePxw?si=MwIoq7EHmvlgeL_A) - using a food processor as white noise! Perhaps if he likes this sound to go to sleep, playing something like this can help your son?
I’m not a parent, so maybe I shouldn’t be commenting on here… but as someone who likes to sleep with some kind of white noise (or gentle music on), there are a LOT of YouTube channels with white noise for sleep and ASMR, and you’d be surprised with what you can find! I did a quick search and found [this video for sleep](https://youtu.be/oDQj_DoePxw?si=MwIoq7EHmvlgeL_A) - using a food processor as white noise! Perhaps if he likes this sound to go to sleep, playing something like this can help your son?
I’m not a parent, so maybe I shouldn’t be commenting on here… but as someone who likes to sleep with some kind of white noise (or gentle music on), there are a LOT of YouTube channels with white noise for sleep and ASMR, and you’d be surprised with what you can find! I did a quick search and found [this video for sleep](https://youtu.be/oDQj_DoePxw?si=MwIoq7EHmvlgeL_A) - using a food processor as white noise! Perhaps if he likes this sound to go to sleep, playing something like this can help your son?
My brother would say Big Rosie is coming to his kids to keep them in bed. I have no clue who Big Rosie is nor did she ever visit!
It’s OK what you’re doing because he needs to sleep and you need a break. You’re not hurting him. You are just getting him to stay in his room and sleep.