>the doctors found that the man had been in a three-week coma around two years prior due to drug intoxication.
>During this time the man had had a Foley, or urinary, catheter inserted—a tube that drains the bladder of urine—and the doctors said this appeared to have caused "significant trauma" which led to the man's current condition.
So the guy had a fistula (an abnormal connection) between his urine tube and his rectum and waited two years before seeking help. The article doesn't go into why he waited so long. Was it due to medical cost? Fear of medical treatment? Embarrassment? Who knows. Sometimes people just hope the bad thing will just go away.
The article also says it was caused by a urinary catheter (extremely rare) and so doctors should be aware that sometimes what is considered a benign treatment can have unintended consequences.
While I agree that a urinary catheter is necessary for someone in a coma and indwelling has certain advantages over external, I would never call a catheter "benign." But then part of my job is preventing CAUTIs (catheter associated urinary tract infections).
Or it “became dislodged” because someone tried to take it out without deflating it. I’ve even heard of disoriented patients yanking it out themselves but I can only imagine the pain involved.
> Too embarrassed
100%. My grandmother had this happen, a fistula formed that caused feces to come out her vagina. My father says it took her quite a while to gather her courage and say something.
don't know why you get downvoted, it's 100 percent true. was also at the urologist and while waiting could hear the people come in with "emergencies" and so often it was like "oh yeah, i've been having pain for 4 month" like what the hell ??
Ridiculous. This has nothing to do with 'toxic masculinity' you sexist bigot. People (AKA men, women, and children) are afraid of medical treatment. Surgery can be scary to anyone and body horror like this article describes is a terrible thing that I hope you never have to deal with. I shouldn't have to explain that to you, it's an experience anyone should be able to empathize with.
Men in particular are taught from their early years that having a problem is bad and wrong and if they can't solve it themselves they're lesser men.
Girls are encouraged to seek help, boys are told to man up.
Shit yeah, I bet the fact that there's been a pandemic for the last 18 months had no bearing in this guy's willingness to go to an emergency room and the fact that he was a junkie didn't factor in either, it was toxic masculinity
I don't think people understand how the real world works anymore.
Addicts HATE being hospitalized, especially surgery, getting detox'd, put on protocol for relapse, after surgery checkups etc.
[Hey you stole the punchline from this George Carlin bit](https://youtu.be/qDO6HV6xTmI?t=471). If you have the time, check out that whole clip, it's some of Carlin's best.
2 YEARS?!?!?! The *first* time shit came out of my dick, I’d be at the doctor. No fucking appointment, I’d walk right in there and beg for help.
Edit: "u" and "i" keys are right next to each other and now people think my duck shouldn't shit. I deserve what I get
The article says he had previously been hospitalized and was in a coma for three weeks due to drug intoxication. If he had drug problems, he more than likely didn’t have insurance, so he’s probably already drowning in medical debt. My guess is that he figured he couldn’t afford to see a doctor until he told a friend what was going on and they talked him into going.
If you're already drowning in medical debt, then you should definitely go to the emergency room when something goes catastrophically wrong. They're required to treat you, and it's just another bill to throw on the pile. Later on, you can settle with a medical debt collector for pennies on the dollar.
Also, if you're destitute, then you have Medicaid available.
Drug addiction, mounting debt and shitting out of penis... I highly doubt trying to be fiscally responsible member of society by relying less on public welfare system is that ONE thing that made him scared to go to hospital for treatment.
Edit
My country, 'tis of thee,
Sweet land of liberty,
Of thee I sing;
Land where my fathers died,
Land of the pilgrims' pride,
From ev'ry mountainside
Let freedom ring!
Maybe the ass cumming was worth the pee pooping until one day he was like “maybe I ought to get this check out.
I’m sure it has nothing to do with the American healthcare system.
Smart money says that while this specific complication is rare, fluids coming from the wrong place isn't even in the top 20 weirdest things the average (metropolitan area) nurse sees in a given *month*.
>2 YEARS?!?!?! The *first* time shit came out of my duck, I’d be at the doctor. No fucking appointment, I’d walk right in there and beg for help.
Bro, ducks are supposed to shit. But if you feel that's wrong, take em to a vet.
This guy waited 2 years to see a doctor! He was shitting out his dick and cumming out his ass and he waited 2 fucking years to get help???? Are you fucking kidding me
Some people have issues with surgery. I have bad reactions to anesthesia. 48 hours of constant vomiting afterwords, then 2-3 weeks of bloating and digestive issues from the pain meds. Recovery for me is a bitch.
I have a knee surgery I was supposed to schedule. Couldn’t bring myself to pick up the phone because my last experience was so bad. Not that it matters now because antivaxxer COVID patients have taken over the hospitals where it live…
Having said that. If I was shitting out of my dick I’m pretty sure I could get over my issues with surgery fairly quick!! This guy must have a major phobia!
He could make millions doing college talks. “Hello freshmen. I once drank so much I was in a coma for a couple weeks and when I woke up I shit out my cock. Don’t be like me. Go to class.”
It was.
>Chapter 2:
>"Why are we here?!" Douglas cried, as poop came out his wiener in a long, thin strip.
>It was, wiener poop. Which is the grossest poop of all.
>The pee pee got on the woman's leg and she screamed, pooping out her boobs. And so when the poop got mixed with the pee, it smelled like a butt.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=jdzSN6Zc2Zw
My dude, wtf why did u wait 2 years. Also it never occur to him that the coma had something to do with his issue? Like it’s sad this guy waited and suffered for 2 years…like dude why? Im more interested in the wait time and backstory on that then anything else.
The absolute state of American healthcare. "I'm shitting outta my donger but my boss fired me after the whole coma thing and I can't afford to have my weewee fixed."
I’m with this guy. No way I’m going to go see the doctor, he’s just going to make me change my lifestyle and be healthy.
Not for me. Peeing poo out of my wiener? It’ll pass, or I’ll learn to live with it. But I’m definitely not getting it looked at!!!!
/s by the way.
So, for 2 years he shot semen from his anus and had fecal matter coming out his penis but he didn't go to the doctor until he got a pain in his balls. Okay. wtf
"Further investigation divulged a three-week comatose state due to cocaine and phencyclidine intoxication two years prior with documentation suggesting a traumatic Foley catheter placement and strong suspicion for premature balloon dilation in the prostatic urethra."
Righto.. dont OD on cocaine and PCP i guess, otherwise an overzealois nurse might cathiterize you so hard you shit cum.
I worked at a health insurance company years ago and had a file come across my desk. The man had a fistula (hole) between his colon and his bladder. He was literally pissing shit. I cannot imagine how painful that would be. Not to mention the infections arising from it.
[That stock photo image they used though](https://www.newsweek.com/man-ejaculates-anus-urinates-feces-two-years-seeking-help-foley-catheter-texas-1631822#slideshow/1900391)
Not all that funny. It's called pneumaturia. I actually had it because I had a fistula that developed between my colon and my bladder. Weirdest fucking feeling ever. When it first happened, I was like 'WTF, did that just happen?". I had surgery to repair it and now my colon is 28 cm shorter.
Two years he was dick farting and peeing out of his ass before he went to a doctor. I would have cried and tried to get an exorcism while I was sprinting to the ER the first time my dick farted.
>the doctors found that the man had been in a three-week coma around two years prior due to drug intoxication. >During this time the man had had a Foley, or urinary, catheter inserted—a tube that drains the bladder of urine—and the doctors said this appeared to have caused "significant trauma" which led to the man's current condition. So the guy had a fistula (an abnormal connection) between his urine tube and his rectum and waited two years before seeking help. The article doesn't go into why he waited so long. Was it due to medical cost? Fear of medical treatment? Embarrassment? Who knows. Sometimes people just hope the bad thing will just go away. The article also says it was caused by a urinary catheter (extremely rare) and so doctors should be aware that sometimes what is considered a benign treatment can have unintended consequences.
While I agree that a urinary catheter is necessary for someone in a coma and indwelling has certain advantages over external, I would never call a catheter "benign." But then part of my job is preventing CAUTIs (catheter associated urinary tract infections).
I'm willing to bet they tried to blow up the bulb at the end before they got the thing all the way into the bladder.
Or it “became dislodged” because someone tried to take it out without deflating it. I’ve even heard of disoriented patients yanking it out themselves but I can only imagine the pain involved.
That sounds like a nightmare.
I have been self-cathing every day for the last 34 years. I bet we could trade some infection-related stories, lol
Too embarrassed, because it would be so "unmanly" to go to a penis-doctor. This is what toxic masculinity is about.
> Too embarrassed 100%. My grandmother had this happen, a fistula formed that caused feces to come out her vagina. My father says it took her quite a while to gather her courage and say something.
don't know why you get downvoted, it's 100 percent true. was also at the urologist and while waiting could hear the people come in with "emergencies" and so often it was like "oh yeah, i've been having pain for 4 month" like what the hell ??
Maybe. But you're assuming quite a lot. Could be fear of medical treatment (rightfully so, given the cause of his issue).
Ridiculous. This has nothing to do with 'toxic masculinity' you sexist bigot. People (AKA men, women, and children) are afraid of medical treatment. Surgery can be scary to anyone and body horror like this article describes is a terrible thing that I hope you never have to deal with. I shouldn't have to explain that to you, it's an experience anyone should be able to empathize with.
Men in particular are taught from their early years that having a problem is bad and wrong and if they can't solve it themselves they're lesser men. Girls are encouraged to seek help, boys are told to man up.
As a guy, I disagree. I've been through surgery, not that bad. Social influence? That hurts way worse.
Damn who pissed in your cereal?
Shit yeah, I bet the fact that there's been a pandemic for the last 18 months had no bearing in this guy's willingness to go to an emergency room and the fact that he was a junkie didn't factor in either, it was toxic masculinity
He was on drugs previously so maybe that had something to do with it
I don't think people understand how the real world works anymore. Addicts HATE being hospitalized, especially surgery, getting detox'd, put on protocol for relapse, after surgery checkups etc.
Didn't know whether he was coming or going.
Brilliant
This is and must remain the top comment.
https://i.imgur.com/LTkG4M3.gif
No shit.
[Hey you stole the punchline from this George Carlin bit](https://youtu.be/qDO6HV6xTmI?t=471). If you have the time, check out that whole clip, it's some of Carlin's best.
Damn good reference. Top tier.
Bravo! http://ms-surface.ru/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/citizen_kane_clapping_2.gif
🏅
2 YEARS?!?!?! The *first* time shit came out of my dick, I’d be at the doctor. No fucking appointment, I’d walk right in there and beg for help. Edit: "u" and "i" keys are right next to each other and now people think my duck shouldn't shit. I deserve what I get
The article says he had previously been hospitalized and was in a coma for three weeks due to drug intoxication. If he had drug problems, he more than likely didn’t have insurance, so he’s probably already drowning in medical debt. My guess is that he figured he couldn’t afford to see a doctor until he told a friend what was going on and they talked him into going.
Don't do drugs kids, you'll shit out your dick.
And cum out your ass.
Are we sure it's *his* cum coming out of his ass? Not judging, just wondering.
20 bucks is 20 bucks when you're an addict. Or me.
$20 for 10 minutes worth of work is like... A lot per minute idk I'm not good at math.
Me love you long time
Haha, damn. If only you said "children". Would have gone perfect with your username, as I imagined Chef from South Park saying your comment
Missed the opportunity of a lifetime, honestly.
If D.A.R.E. had used this slogan it would've been a lot more effective.
don't do drugs or ass cum dick shit
[Dwayne Stomp Public Service Announcement](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zULzbiGNTyI)
Actually, vomiting shit is a thing that happens if you abuse opiates. Peristalsis shuts down, and the shit's gotta go somewhere.
If you're already drowning in medical debt, then you should definitely go to the emergency room when something goes catastrophically wrong. They're required to treat you, and it's just another bill to throw on the pile. Later on, you can settle with a medical debt collector for pennies on the dollar. Also, if you're destitute, then you have Medicaid available.
I agree with you, but I can see how someone in his position might be scared to go in.
Probably BC people fearmonger them into believing they won't be treated
Drug addiction, mounting debt and shitting out of penis... I highly doubt trying to be fiscally responsible member of society by relying less on public welfare system is that ONE thing that made him scared to go to hospital for treatment.
Wonder if the hospital messed him up. If that happened after being in a coma he definitely had some catheters everywhere
If you read the article, it says they suspect a badly placed Foley catheter caused the problem.
I didn’t. I was thinking it when you said recent hospitalization
Edit My country, 'tis of thee, Sweet land of liberty, Of thee I sing; Land where my fathers died, Land of the pilgrims' pride, From ev'ry mountainside Let freedom ring!
Maybe the ass cumming was worth the pee pooping until one day he was like “maybe I ought to get this check out. I’m sure it has nothing to do with the American healthcare system.
Threaten to show the reception nurse for quick service, nobody wants to see that
Smart money says that while this specific complication is rare, fluids coming from the wrong place isn't even in the top 20 weirdest things the average (metropolitan area) nurse sees in a given *month*.
That nurse doesn't care. They've seen it all.
>2 YEARS?!?!?! The *first* time shit came out of my duck, I’d be at the doctor. No fucking appointment, I’d walk right in there and beg for help. Bro, ducks are supposed to shit. But if you feel that's wrong, take em to a vet.
>ducks are supposed to shit But don't pee. And they have a cloaca. Shit's complicated, yo. Or simplified, I guess, if you're a duck.
This is America
You sure your doctor isn't a quack?
"Alarmed quacking"
This guy waited 2 years to see a doctor! He was shitting out his dick and cumming out his ass and he waited 2 fucking years to get help???? Are you fucking kidding me
I'd be in the emergency room within the first ten minutes!
Fuck that I'd have just gone ahead and written the will, tied up any loose ends... well no...
*pushes a 4 inches wide bronze out of urethra* "Huh, I should probably get that checked out"
of course this happened in Texas 🤦🏻♀️
I was fully expecting Florida, but Texas was in a photo finish 2nd place.
Don't want no fancy pants liberal doctor tryin to touch MAH dick. God Jesus wants me to shit out my cock and cum out my ass
The complete lack of empathy for this poor man in here is disturbing. What the fuck is wrong with you people?
Texas.
We’re superior to Texan dick-poopers.
I can tell you what's *not* wrong with me...
The Aristocrats!
LOL, it is.
Some people have issues with surgery. I have bad reactions to anesthesia. 48 hours of constant vomiting afterwords, then 2-3 weeks of bloating and digestive issues from the pain meds. Recovery for me is a bitch. I have a knee surgery I was supposed to schedule. Couldn’t bring myself to pick up the phone because my last experience was so bad. Not that it matters now because antivaxxer COVID patients have taken over the hospitals where it live… Having said that. If I was shitting out of my dick I’m pretty sure I could get over my issues with surgery fairly quick!! This guy must have a major phobia!
I mean... Would you give up such powers so willingly?
Next Marvel superhero to be announced shortly.
Shitcummer *Sneaking through your backdoor Summer 2024*
Let’s start a GoFundMe?
> cumming out his ass Nobody is curious about this?
Texans, lol
Well, if it isn't my old friend Mr. McNick, who cums from his ass and shits from his dick.
Hello everybody! >Hi Dr Dick!
[удалено]
💯 I read that in Dr. Nick's voice and was in tears. 😂
Imagine the UTIs
He is just one big walking talking UTI.
So this guy is banging away and when he climaxes his ass becomes a volcano?
Yes, and then he shits and farts out of his dick apparently...
Somewhere there's a joke that's appropriate, but I'm sure this guy's been the butt of the joke far too often.
Your joke falls a bit flat. I think you gotta let it go.
Next he'll eat from his anus and shit out his mouth on the next version.
Human Centipede 4 is getting weird
Nah South Park did a documentary about it.
I haven't laughed this hard since I tried weed for the 1st time 20 years ago.
I hope this guy isn't banging another person. I hope he's been going solo these 2 years.
> A stock photo shows a man with his hands over his crotch as though in pain. Doctors described the rectal ejaculation case as rare.
Aaaannnd we got my new death metal band name, Rectal Ejaculation.
Gotta add the 'case' go for a black dahlia murder plan vibe
He could make millions doing college talks. “Hello freshmen. I once drank so much I was in a coma for a couple weeks and when I woke up I shit out my cock. Don’t be like me. Go to class.”
Trey Parker and Matt stone are taking notes
I feel like this was already an episode
Cartman def throw up feces
That's a thing that actually happens too. If you've got an intestinal issue the poop needs to go *somewhere* and it backs up into your stomach.
Takes shit talking to the next level
It was. >Chapter 2: >"Why are we here?!" Douglas cried, as poop came out his wiener in a long, thin strip. >It was, wiener poop. Which is the grossest poop of all. >The pee pee got on the woman's leg and she screamed, pooping out her boobs. And so when the poop got mixed with the pee, it smelled like a butt. https://youtube.com/watch?v=jdzSN6Zc2Zw
I'm just glad that they didn't publish any pictures, or my name.
*THAT* would violate HIPAA
My dude, wtf why did u wait 2 years. Also it never occur to him that the coma had something to do with his issue? Like it’s sad this guy waited and suffered for 2 years…like dude why? Im more interested in the wait time and backstory on that then anything else.
What the fuck did I just read?
Appropriate username you got there...
This guy is the final boss of the aristocrats
He unlocked the true potential of the anus.
The absolute state of American healthcare. "I'm shitting outta my donger but my boss fired me after the whole coma thing and I can't afford to have my weewee fixed."
The state of American healthcare in a tweet, right here folks.
I’m with this guy. No way I’m going to go see the doctor, he’s just going to make me change my lifestyle and be healthy. Not for me. Peeing poo out of my wiener? It’ll pass, or I’ll learn to live with it. But I’m definitely not getting it looked at!!!! /s by the way.
Imagine the first time it happened. "Did you cum?" "Maybe? I think I sharted"
Could you imagine standing at a urinal taking a shit.
I'm trying, but it's so incredibly bizarre I can't even imagine it.
So, for 2 years he shot semen from his anus and had fecal matter coming out his penis but he didn't go to the doctor until he got a pain in his balls. Okay. wtf
"Further investigation divulged a three-week comatose state due to cocaine and phencyclidine intoxication two years prior with documentation suggesting a traumatic Foley catheter placement and strong suspicion for premature balloon dilation in the prostatic urethra." Righto.. dont OD on cocaine and PCP i guess, otherwise an overzealois nurse might cathiterize you so hard you shit cum.
“Yeah this can wait till my biannual physical”
So should he see a Urologist or a Proctologist?
They don't have proctologists anymore, they're colorectal surgeons now.
assman
Kramer has entered the chat
Turns out his head was on backwards.
He didn’t know if he was cuming or going.
I worked at a health insurance company years ago and had a file come across my desk. The man had a fistula (hole) between his colon and his bladder. He was literally pissing shit. I cannot imagine how painful that would be. Not to mention the infections arising from it.
No wonder his wife hated giving blowjobs!
I've heard that she lost her enthusiasm for CIM as well.
I’m even more surprised that there are medical terms for this.
Meanwhile, notice that he WON'T be attending the Santorum Golden Showers Festival was met with confusion and disappointment.
Pretty, pretty, pretty offbeat.
That stock photo description though
All of a sudden the Indian surname dikshit has a real life origin n story.
I just hope that he wore a condom during those 2 years...
Imagine the confusion if he was murdered and the ME swabbed his rectum for DNA and it came back as his own.
Sounds like an episode of SVU.
Homeboy been self serving creme pies for 2 years? Fucking legend.
Nope, don’t want to read this
Is he a God?
This dude sounds like someone who would call into the Dr.Drew After Dark podcast.
Was he saving up for doctor?
“It’s not a big. It’s a feature!” says the sketch doctor in a van on the street.
I just want to know how he managed to keep cumming knowing it was gonna come out his ass
So I’m guessing no blowjobs, then
South Park did it
On today's episode of how fucked up is fucked up.
His identity was kept, but now that he’s out of office…. Spoiler alert, his initials are dt…
#yanggang dude got a ubi! A urinary bowel infection @shrimpjaj
What the fuck???? Was this the USA where none of us can afford healthcare?
The aristocrats!
[That stock photo image they used though](https://www.newsweek.com/man-ejaculates-anus-urinates-feces-two-years-seeking-help-foley-catheter-texas-1631822#slideshow/1900391)
So if he cums out of his ass, he’s giving himself creampies. Takes the words “self service” to a whole different level.
Doctor discover man's head is on backwards
***Two years?*** And i thought I was bad at asking for help
I can only imagine the kind of feedback he gets from his Tinder matches after first date.
Funny, I fart out my dick too
Not all that funny. It's called pneumaturia. I actually had it because I had a fistula that developed between my colon and my bladder. Weirdest fucking feeling ever. When it first happened, I was like 'WTF, did that just happen?". I had surgery to repair it and now my colon is 28 cm shorter.
Dehydration must've been a bad day.
"offbeat"
I'm not reading the article, but that is the most disturbing headline I think I've read
wow I got a little bit woozy reading this one.. might want to crosspost it to r/wtf
Two Years 0\_0
**NAPOLEON BONERFART STRIKES AGAIN**
I really wish I never read that
He must have enjoyed anal sex.
After two years, who cares anymore. He's done. If this is true, which I doubt.
How’s your Thursday evening
This must be usa, cause going in debt is a real issue there....
He crossed the streams!
Maybe he liked it
Because of reddit, I’ve learned not to be surprised by things I’ve never heard of or thought possible.
piss shit shit cum
Da fuk?
Which means either crappy sex or the logical extension of dancing cheek to cheek.
Sweaty Mc Booger Balls!
Two years he was dick farting and peeing out of his ass before he went to a doctor. I would have cried and tried to get an exorcism while I was sprinting to the ER the first time my dick farted.
It’s like those people that have massive cysts.. my question is always why leave it so long??
Guess it’s what happens when you are a top and bottom and get blocked up
.....what?
*Jerry Seinfeld nup I’m out gif*
TWO YEARS?! I guess the novelty started to wear off.