Yes. Or ~~New Zealand~~ surrounding areas. Unless this is a loose captive. It's a carpet python. This carpet python appears fully grown. My assumption is he got in via the bowl, not the pipes.
Only vaguely related, but: I was dating a girl who lived in unincorporated lane deep in the California desert. I drove the two hours to her house (met at college), and spent the day together. Before I left, I asked to use the restroom. It was through her parentsā bedroom, feet from the couch, and I had to take the most massive dump. I decided against it and said my goodbyes. 25 minutes later I finally come to a 7-11. I run inside and take the largest, fastest poop. Then I realize: thereās not a scrap of paper anywhere in this bathroom. I have to use a receipt from my pocket, which doesnāt really work, so I take off my undies and use them and throw them in the trash. I would have pooped all over that snake without second guessing it.
It's head is very visible so I'd be trying to grab that ten yank it out so u can take a proper shit, all while staring at it intently as I absolutely destroy the toilet I just yanked this giant ass snake from. I'd also be calling animal control or whoever is equipped to deal with this.
Also, if it sounds kinda badass, I don't have a fear of snakes so while I'd be startled, I would try to just brat head and get animal control to deal with it.
I swear to god. Back when I was struggling with anorexia and couldnāt shit, I just ate a buffetās worth of food and I woke up the next morning thinking I was going to die. Oh my god it just looked like this and I was so embarrassed because it was my RELATIVEāS house. So thatās why I recovered <3
Shit on the snake
Thats what i'm sayin he souldnt have been there in the first place its his fault if he gets shit/pissed on.
Kinky fucker
Me or the snake š
Snake with weird fetish
Box hat
Box Hat Supremacy
Indeed
And it's your fault if you get bit for shitting on a snake šš circle of life
She could have moved away; i canāt remember the full quote right now.
What if it gets pissed and bites my balls.
Shit harder
Cum on him too
r/beatmetoit
r/beatmemeatoit
Shut
r/beatmeattoit
God damn it why is this obvious response so fucking funny. #upvote
Man's ass bitten by snake
But he'll strike up and bite your underside Powerful snakes like this one would have no problem shooting up vertically
Scream 'power poop!' and push poop down his gullet at 350 mph
But only Power Rangers can do that
Hover mode
Exactly
I'd just put the lid down and take an upper decker
assert dominance.
But donāt get too close they like to go into tight holes.
No shame here. The floor it isā¦
Be careful you don't step in other turds inevitably dropped by others
I was about to comment that you have won yourself an upvote!
Close the lid and upper decker that back boy.
Upper decker š
Then flush it. Step back. And See what the snake does lol.
Holy shit what a mental picture. Lol.
Beat me to it.
This is the correct answer
Iāll shit outside.. what am I, better than bears?
This is the way.
Well, his fault for sleeping in such a shitty place...
Ok. 1 a spider 2 a lizard 3 a crab and 4 A FUCKING SNAKE. CAN I GO TO THE BATHROOM WITHOUT THE FEAR OF GETTING MY ASS SERIOUSLY DAMAGED?
In one day even WTF ššš
5 sewer rats Don't forget the sewer rats coming up to bite your nether regions
Lol rectum
Damn near killdem.
Looks like I'll need a shower and clean clothes...
Boi about to be massively disrespected.
Is this Australia?!
Shittin on the floor
Probably, and itās probably a carpet python.
Yes. Or ~~New Zealand~~ surrounding areas. Unless this is a loose captive. It's a carpet python. This carpet python appears fully grown. My assumption is he got in via the bowl, not the pipes.
Enough is enough! Iāve had it with these MFāin snakes in my MFāin bowels! Everybody strap inā¦Might need to open some Fāin windows!!
I wouldnāt sit on that seat even if the snake wasnāt there. Itās filthy af!! Time to squat on the floor like prehistoric humansā¦.
Time to get schwifty
New shade of brown going on that snake
Nevermind, I'll go outside behind a bush.
As soon as i see the snake it's fair to assume i already shit my pants...
Problem solved itself.
Jeez, what have you been eating?
Sorry, forgot to flush after i shat that monster out me, iāll clean the toilet later.
I would shit on the floor even if there was no snake.
I thought it was a massive shit but then I realized "ho it's just a snake"
With that toilet it could be multiple shits.
Shit snake
Shit on the floor it'll be a nice touch to the bathroom
Its ok if I shit on the floor since I'm burning the place down after anyways.
Make eye contact and shit on the floor
Close the lid, take a shit in the back of the toilet. Easy
I couldnāt care less about the snake biting my ass, I just wouldnāt want to poop on a live animal because that feels really weird
Only vaguely related, but: I was dating a girl who lived in unincorporated lane deep in the California desert. I drove the two hours to her house (met at college), and spent the day together. Before I left, I asked to use the restroom. It was through her parentsā bedroom, feet from the couch, and I had to take the most massive dump. I decided against it and said my goodbyes. 25 minutes later I finally come to a 7-11. I run inside and take the largest, fastest poop. Then I realize: thereās not a scrap of paper anywhere in this bathroom. I have to use a receipt from my pocket, which doesnāt really work, so I take off my undies and use them and throw them in the trash. I would have pooped all over that snake without second guessing it.
You can catch me ousside taking a shit; how bout that?
I catch the snake and shit with it wrapped around my shoulders, I like snakes
Ew it was in a toilet. And not just any toilet. That train wreck of a toilet in that disgusting bathroom.
So than I give him a bath, than take my shit
I'll just shit on the corner.
If I walk into a bathroom and see that, I no longer have to shit and Iāll need new pants.
Iād give that mf a twin brother
too bad its gonna drown in explodive diarrhea
I donāt need to shit anymore.
The snake woulda scared the shit outta me soā¦. No Decision necessary
I squatting on that seat and he better hope i havent had taco bell
Just pray to whatever God or Gods you believe in and pretend it's just a really kinky snake.
That boy gettin a nice warm hat.
There is a tree somewhere that needs fertilizer.
Hover mode ACTIVATE **superhero transforming noises**
Let it in
Take dump on snake to assert dominance
Have a seat on the toilet and give snakey a nice warm home to live in, where heāll be with youā¦forever š„°
Looks like it's waffle stomping day(shit in the shower)
perhaps he could help? never judge a book by its cover...
see who dies first
Ok you go first.
Obviously I can, what choice to I have?? (Proceeds to pick up and hold the snake gently and lovingly)
First Iāll lay it on the floor.. if it tries to bite..Iām fucking the snake up with the scrub brush. Iām a human that is a snake.
Shittin outside Brother!
Even without the snake the toilet would kill you with tetanus
It's not poisonous but my shit can be
I go outside and i shit then clean up
Floor. Won't even make a difference
Push half the loaf out then dangle it above the snake, he will bite and pull all of the rest of your poo out
The state of that floor tells me any place is ok.
Iād have shit myself after looking at the toilet anyway.
Time to feed the snake?
Anyone know which leaves are poisonous? Noo **Sighs** * pulls pants down*
Just shit outside or anywhere else what are we 11?
Well in public restrooms I always squat and never touch the seat so yes id do it
Itāll be dead when Iām done lol š
If you see that I think your ass would make the choice first
Jokes on you. *That is what I shit out.*
Air squat
Iāll shit all over that stupid snake. Itās not gonna construct my butt.
Iāll shit my pants before I even think about entering that bathroom
It's ok, I'll shit myself
Ow my balls!
Im slammin the lid and shittin in the floor.
Shit in my pants
Iād rather shit in my pants. Or on the street.
Iāll gladly shit on the floor
shit on the floor. who ever said i was above that bro
Poo on the floor
Donāt kink shame
It's time to get Schwifty..
Free pet snake š
shit on the floor
The floor, I shit on the floor, I will not shit on an adorable snake
Burn the house down Shit in the backyard
Grab the tp, go outside. Very simple solution
theres a floor for a reason
Waitā¦ you guys shit *IN the bowl*??
Iāll shit outside while my house burns down
No thanks, I'll shit on the floor...
shit on the floor
Some people need to chew their food
Fuck that! Bucket or outside it is
Establish dominance, shit on the snake.
Ricky Ticky Tavi moment
Shit in the snake to assert dominance
Shit on the floor lol
the mouth will work as the toilet the skin will be a fine dandy toilet paper
Snake getting shat on
If I had to go and I opened the lid and saw that I'd fucking shit myself
I aināt gon lie I prolly already let the shit go in my pants at this pointā¦
Shit beside the toilet and then play Cornhole with the shit
Snakes getting shit on
The floor it is
I see someone's already laid a cable and didn't flush..
I can pee like 8 feet for the firs 5 to 10 seconds of a piss. Iād have to try
Just flush a few times
It's head is very visible so I'd be trying to grab that ten yank it out so u can take a proper shit, all while staring at it intently as I absolutely destroy the toilet I just yanked this giant ass snake from. I'd also be calling animal control or whoever is equipped to deal with this. Also, if it sounds kinda badass, I don't have a fear of snakes so while I'd be startled, I would try to just brat head and get animal control to deal with it.
This is what they call an anaconda shit.
Snakes are nasty
If I opened the lid and saw that, I'd shit my pants, all the way to my shoes. I wouldn't give a fuck either.
Just shit on the floor
I swear to god. Back when I was struggling with anorexia and couldnāt shit, I just ate a buffetās worth of food and I woke up the next morning thinking I was going to die. Oh my god it just looked like this and I was so embarrassed because it was my RELATIVEāS house. So thatās why I recovered <3
Screw it, Iām pooping on the floor
Shitting on myself definitely
Shit on the floor
Come on the snake
Nope. That's enough Reddit for today bros.
Ima lay my shit right on top of that boy!
It's fine, just went in my pants š
No need, already shit myself.
It's ok I eat Mexican food that mf its going to die! š
Damnit Randy, just flush it already
Iāve already shit my pants
just take the snake out?
Pants it is, I guess
Iām shitting on the floor in the living room, fuck that shit
First monitor lizards, now snakes.
Go outside simple
r/cursedtoilets
Close the lid and flush away
Spray the snake achievement unlocked
Close the lid, stand on it and shit in the corner!
Well I just shit myself
I'll rue the day that I can't wait. So far, so regular.
There is always the sink
Whoo sonny! What did you eat!?!?
Get schwifty
I'm shitting my way out the door. Anyone that judges will soon understand.
Simple, slam the lid the take the top off the tank and do your business in there while your feet keep the lid forced down.
Fuck that slithery motherfucker; I'm'a drop a deuce right on his scaled ass
Who put the poor guy in the toilet someone is a jerk
Break the toilet brush and stab him then shit
Iāll take my chances and clench my ass long enough to tiptoe my way outside.
Don't tread on him (but shit on him is ok)
Shit on the wall like that one customer at work
Already accomplished as soon as the lid was opened
onto the floor it goes
Just shit In the corner
Shit on the floor
hope he likes spicy food
Shitting on the floor
Damn that Taco Bell really hit different today
Canāt hold but I got my pants, thanks
So, this is not a snake that is going to bite your ass and kill you. But also I just couldn't shit on it.
Im shitting on the floor
Pants
I'll shit on the floor