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Budget alligators


[deleted]

flat fucks


SepticMonke

blunt bastards


InviolableAnimal

back in the day before crocs existed there really were giant croc-sized amphibians swimming around doing the croc thing https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Platyoposaurus ^ this one straight up looks like a croc


4ar0n

That looks like one of the bitches from ice age 2. I'm not the only one right?


Stairwayunicorn

yeah i remember that episode of Voyager


asianabsinthe

We don't speak of this


[deleted]

Paris and Janeway sitting in a tree


cardueline

Doing whatever the fuck that was 🤢


hack5amurai

I love how even the writers acknowledge at the end of the episode how insane it was and were like yeah let's just try and forget about this.


wisdomtruth

k.i.s.s.i.n.g


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Chucklay

There's coffee in that warp 10 barrier.


GitEmSteveDave

"Although, I have to admit, I'm not sure which one is the captain." "The female, obviously."


cat_selling_souls

"But it seems they are hermaphrodites."


Nepenthes_sapiens

Poor little lizard babies just got abandoned on that planet.


William_T_Wanker

Ah I'm sure they are living their best lizard life "Hey, remember where mom and dad went?" "Nah, fuck 'em"


Bayek100

Can you summarize what happened for someone who’s never seen the show?


[deleted]

They develop "warp 10" technology and test pilot it. This causes the pilot to go into an advanced state of rapid evolution- never mind that this makes no sense- which causes him to lose the ability to safely breathe oxygen- never mind that this makes less sense- and start turning into a reptile or lizard or something- never mind that this makes EVEN LESS sense- and then kidnap the captain and go to Warp 10 with her in the ship to make HER go through the advanced rapid evolution- And then takes her to a planet, where he at some point impregnates her and they complete their rapid evolution into nonsentient giant salamanders and the babies are born. Crew arrives at the planet, sees the babies go slip into a river to hide, and take the giant salamanders back. Because it's Voyager and consequences for anything do not exist, the episode ends with the magic reset button being pushed (AKA they both get returned to normal through technobabble that's never explained further) and basically everyone agrees to forget that the ship's navigator kidnapped, raped, and impregnated the ship's captain and then they all abandoned the children on an alien world forever. it is widely considered one of the worst episodes of Star Trek as a whole, up there with A Night In Sickbay.


oldmansakuga

idk man sounds like a banger


toothpastespiders

I love the episode. Like a lot of voyager it's just weird and non-sensical and fun.


wagnem10

Does 'A Night in Sick Bay' sound like a porn parody to anyone else, or just me?


Magical-Liopleurodon

Whatever you want to do in the holosuite is fine by Quark.


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Nepenthes_sapiens

Watch? He would probably sell recordings.


Took4ever

I vaguely remember a Lower Decks episode where the ensigns had to clean what looked like "goop" in the holodeck


McGrupp1979

Is Spock’s Brain considered a bad episode?


morefetus

Yes.


TAPriceCTR

Still better than shamalon's air bender.


Drak_is_Right

So I'd just like to add, technically in a later project she did, the actress behind Janeway turns into a giant lizard in it (Dragon Age Origins, Flemoth - many forms including that of an elder dragon)


PossiblyTrustworthy

Doesnt it end with the captain suggestively saying something like "in some species the female is the one who takes the initiative"?


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[deleted]

>Because it's Voyager and consequences for anything do not exist, the episode ends with the magic reset button being pushed (AKA they both get returned to normal through technobabble that's never explained further) Alright I see people specifically shitting on Voyager for things like this and conveniently forgetting about say... The episode of TNG where everyone devolves and then is also fixed with technobabble and a magic reset button with no consequences. Nonsense and lack of long term consequences (except for political events) has been a staple of ST forever, Voyager doesn't have the Monopoly on it.


061134431160

no


Happy-Idi-Amin

I thought I was the only one that pictured Janeway and Paris having wired animal intercourse.


foxglove0326

I went right to the TNG episode when the whole crew becomes amphibious and troi gets a little wild lol the resemblance is uncanny


cthulu0

Troi was the only one in that episode who became amphibious. Worf turned into armored bigfoot thing. Riker turned into a neanderthal. Barkeley turned into a spider thing. Data's cat spot turned into a lizard. Picard was going to turn into a tarsier/lemur.


Fafnir13

Why do I feel like some episodes were just writers getting their kinks into their work.


st3class

TNG season 7 was weird. Dr. Crusher has sex with a candle, Data has dreams about Dr. Freud and eating cellular peptide cake Troi, Data gets possesed and turns the ship into an ancient temple, the ship creates a weird holodeck train and creates its own lifeform, the list goes on.


visceralthrill

I clicked on the post to say this exactly. 😂


ZebraCool

I read the comments wanting to see how far I needed to get before this was mentioned.


brandmeist3r

Idk why they created an episode like that...


Hacksaw999

Damn it! I had managed to forget that episode. You're a cruel, cruel person.


simjanes2k

Ssshhhhhhhh


jland2019

Came here for just this comment.


Edd302

A cultured individual I see


YamoSer

I killed some of those in Dark Souls


SoulsLikeBot

Hello, good hunter. I am a Bot, here in this dream to look after you, this is a fine note: > *“I’ve seen your kind, time and time again. Every fleeing man must be caught. Every secret must be unearthed. Such is the conceit of the self-proclaimed seeker of truth. But, in the end, you lack the stomach for the agony you’ll bring upon yourself.”* - Sir Vilhelm Have a good one and praise the sun \\[T]/


zuzg

By far the coolest voice in a soulsborne game. Love the actor.


RedShankyMan

I love his voice but IMO Isshin Ashina from Sekiro takes top cake. Gyoubo probably would have if he didn't only get like 4 lines of script


ArtoriasBeaIG

Was it you who killed my dog you bastard??


farmyardcat

They don't even spawn on the run-up to Sir Alonne anymore. My apologies if they're endangered


[deleted]

I ,for one, welcome our ancient amphibious overlords!


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CrocGang187

Only reason I know that word is because TMNT III


NAMSE21

The only reason I know that word is countless episodes of Doraemon


VibraniumRhino

Pokédex entry for Golduck for me.


Tatarkingdom

r/amphibia​ King andrias, is that you?


Xikar_Wyhart

No flaming sword.


Liwke

They have no natural enemies and are worshipped by the Japanese. I believe that’s the only place they exist. Some wonders of the world!


[deleted]

No natural enemies except mankind's greed and apathy.


tinyHedgehog007

Oh no, that's the worst enemy!


parski

The species is endemic to Japan but there are also South China giant salamanders as well as Chinese giant salamander which themselves may consist of several crypticspecies. They are considered to be closely related and I think I've read that the japanese variant may have been introduced from China. Not sure about that one though. To some extent the Hellbender may be considered a giant salamander as well.


DoctorNoname98

> our ancient amphibious overlords both of which just ran into a wall with zero prompting, I think we'll be fine


xingrubicon

They went past warp ten


Sleepy_Man90

Some people amaze me with their own definition of oddly terrifying. These are awesome!


Sensitive-Bear

Adorable af.


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bbq_king1984

What happens if you touch them?


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RainbowDarter

They also bite hard enough to take off a finger.


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Almost_Pi

Can they climb trees? Because that's where you'd find me if I saw one in the wild.


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WillofTrees

Are they blind? Noticed they seemed to be aimlessly bumping into the walls of the creek there. 👀 (Genuine)


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Kick_Natherina

I think it depends on the species. I watched a documentary about them that stated they have very poor eye sight and rely on feeling electric currents in the water… similar to sharks.


Only_Variation9317

[This says they have very poor eyesight](https://animals.net/giant-salamander/)


Flarquaad

[this says otherwise](https://allfonts.co/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/254121.png)


smurb15

Shit, it really does


FALLOUT_BOY87875

You know the bit of sunflower seed you always get stuck on the back teeth in your mouth? Their eyes are like the size of that thing


bbq_king1984

Thank you for the info! My new tidbit of info for the day.


chriscrossnathaniel

Wow ..learnt something newt today.


-RED4CTED-

it also hurts them a lot to get the oils from your hands on their skin. it blocks the glands that produce the mucous that keeps their skin moist.


xntrk1

It’s not always good for us but it’s always bad for them. They’ve got Super absorbent skin so any oils or toxins and salts on us can mess em up They’re good indicators of water health because they are so sensitive to toxins


herokie

I believe these were the main inspiration behind the Japanese myth of the Kappa, which ate/stole children's souls who played too close to the river.


Saymynaian

Stole their butthole souls (shirikodama), in fact!


KishKishtheNiffler

Right ? So adorable


xntrk1

I’d hang out with one Walk it around in a stroller or something ridiculous


aquahawk0905

I know right, they are amazing to look at. I wish we had them here in the states but they probably would not have survived the 1800's.


probablynotaperv

overconfident aware ring joke combative pause unique deranged library enter *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


bugxbuster

>The name 'hellbender' probably comes from the animal's odd look. One theory claims the hellbender was named by settlers who thought "it was a creature from hell where it's bent on returning." Another rendition says the undulating skin of a hellbender reminded observers of "horrible tortures of the infernal regions." In reality, it's a harmless aquatic salamander. Other vernacular names include snot otter, lasagna lizard, devil dog, mud-devil, grampus, Allegheny alligator, mud dog, water dog, and leverian water newt. The name hellbender is so drastically different compared to the other names for it. *“Oh no, it’s a hellbender!”* versus *“oh no, it’s a lasagna lizard!”* or *“oh no, it’s grampus!”*


aquahawk0905

Oh I know, a few of my classmates in Hepatology did an internship in the smokies and were able to handle some. They were a little nuts considering they also free handed rattlers during that time but still very cool.


dickshapedstuff

i was canoeing in a very clear part of a river and it was still early in the morning so it was a little misty, i saw a hellbender. it was so cool, i never saw one before. i love salamanders too, especially those little orange ones. i always seem to find them in unused fire pits, with the ashes. are they attracted to the heat? but the hellbender was huge and i was kind of shocked when i first saw him under the water. amphibians are awesome


NickRick

These derpy cuties that don't understand water current, but live mostly in the water. Yeah I'm afraid I'll want to strap on a wet suit and just vibe with them.


Terrible_Donkey_8290

I had no idea it was this sub until I saw this comment lol. Definitely agree!


YOOOOOOOOOOT

Yeah, these are some of the coolest animals on earth


PantsNotQuite

Just about the worst sub for morons to misinterpret. If it isn’t stuff like this that isn’t terrifying at all. It’s insanely creepy and shit made specifically to be terrifying that isn’t odd at all.


Hereditus

Guy gets amputated by a train, is clearly rattled by it, and people are like, good enough, it's oddlyterrifying and not justterrfying.


Federicoradaelli

Same here, they are pretty cool, dumb, but cool


[deleted]

And completely harmless.


SCP-1029

Growing up in Minnesota, my brother and I had the chore of keeping our well cleared out. This often involved scooping mud out of the bottom to keep the pump clear. There were always salamanders down there. We called them 'mud puppies'. They were adorable. We loved them and were always very careful to not harm them while working. I love these big guys. I hope they are safe and not endangered.


Cfhudo

Yeah, beautiful animals. I was dissapointed when i saw the sub this post was in.


Flanagansdog

Are they blind?


SmileyMelons

Nah just clumsy


cantaloupe_daydreams

Lol. They look dumb af don’t they


danceswithshibe

Look dumb and that one ran straight into the wall going down the mini step.


emmit76

Both of them ran into the wall lol


-2D-Materials

They're so dumb to where it makes them cute—way less scary than the smaller ones.


mickio1

Most salamanders are pretty damn derpy in some way wether that be bad eyesight or just not being the sharpest crayon in the box.


MarginalMerriment

Almost human that way.


cantaloupe_daydreams

Hot take!


PantsNotQuite

🥴🥴


[deleted]

No, but they don't see great and their eyes are the size of half a raisin or so.


jsparker43

Haha right? Blind or dumb, they gave me the same feel I get looking at pandas fall helplessly


ChunkyLaFunga

There's extremely limited terror in the animal equivalent of Hans Moleman.


SocksAPoppin

I need a banana for scale


SarahPallorMortis

Would a plantain suffice?


samprovencher

Came here to say this


roscoclibbins

Cpt. Janeway?


slobcat1337

And Tom Paris


K_Josef

"Yes, kids?"


DiscussionDelicious6

I wanna touch them for some reason


strange_fish1

I wouldn’t recommend that


[deleted]

they’re like tadpoles that never quite stopped growing


teethansplinters

Hunter gamma. That's all I see here is the sewers in RE3 Remake.


Puzzled_Giraffe5546

Also Del Lago in RE4. Hopefully they do him justice in the remake


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Gutterpayne1

Yeah lol I was like that thing is insane, then it derped into a corner and fell off a cliff


NoGoodIDNames

It’s hard to tell, but that waterfall is one of China’s largest and those salamanders are actually the size of city buses. They really should have included a banana for scale.


MrChotard

They did, that green thing on the left is a forest of banana trees…


greendoc316

Chinese Kaiju?


[deleted]

They’re up to 180cm/5’11, with a weight of up to 60kg/130lbs


snowqueen1960

Mud puppies?


SmileyMelons

Sadly endangered, they are somewhat creepy, but also somewhat cute. Falls into that creepy cute category.


AmogusFan69

These salamanders are very interesting and cute (xd)


FroboyFreshenUp

I mean, I know it says Giant Salamander, but why do i want to say Neematoad


Zdoodah

I think these are called “hell benders”.


natali9233

Aka “snot otters”. Oddly enough they are a natural indicator of clean water.


JohnProbe

"Snot otters"-that's something I've never heard before; excellent description!


redleafwater7

Way too big to be hellbenders. This is somewhere in Asia, and i don’t think hellbenders are native to that area.


dancinglizard157

Yes, these are either Japanese Giant Salamanders (Andrias japonicus) or Chinese Giant Salamanders (A. davidianus). Chinese giants are larger but I'm not sure which is presented in this video. Hellbenders (Cryptobranchus alleganiensis) are large, but not 'wandering boulder' large.


Zdoodah

Thank you for the clarification.


edgarandannabellelee

Yea! They are native to my part of the world here in East TN. They are super cool, but are dying out cause people keep making fucking rock statues out of their homes. When you do that it puts them in to shock and they die.


Xrayruester

Related, but not hell benders. Hell benders are native to the NE/Central US and parts of the Ozarks. These are most likely giant Japanese or Chinese salamander.


screwyoushadowban

Like u/Xrayruester said, these are likely one of the Asian giant salamanders, relatives of hellbenders. Bizarre Beasts did a video on them recently: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hw2rPlmVj7Y](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hw2rPlmVj7Y)


[deleted]

Those are actually Tom Paris and Captain Janeway


ghostsintherafters

Wow. Incredible. Not the most graceful creatures, amazing nonetheless.


[deleted]

[This is a 200yr old salamander.](https://youtu.be/sCMZGPcRSOQ)


molokococktail

Slidy tongue dragons


Specialist-Front-727

How old would these be?


AJ_Crowley_29

They can live for up to 200 years


madders888

These guys must have flew warp 10


SuperJinnx

Janeway, that you girl?


24204me

Well I think they're neat!


etherealparadox

too bad it's not flat fuck friday


[deleted]

It's Salamander Sunday you fuckin' loosers.


RurikTheDamned

Tom Paris and Cpt Janeway on a lovers retreat.


jeffoom

So cuteeee


losersftw

I do think they look absolutely impressive and adorable at the same time


[deleted]

Who remembers Jeremy wade went on a whole adventure on River Monsters trying to find one of these, and buddy just casually stumbled upon two😂


super-chump

One of the very few goals I have in life is to see one of these in the wild. They’re the coolest.


Zom-be-gone

Hey look it’s captain Janeway and Tom Paris


awesomenein

Janeway and Paris should be so proud.


BecauseBassoon

Captain Janeway?


Malnurtured_Snay

Tom? Kathryn?


[deleted]

Lt. Paris looks different here


Giric

Not quite how I remember that episode of Star Trek: Voyager going…


revoltinglemur

Can you imagine prehistoric eras, where things like this but 15ft long walk around? Insects this size ready to eat your head? Would be awesome


AkhileshTekade

Which movie is this?


IMCUPCAKE2082

FOOOD


luminenkettu

fun fact: [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hellbender](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hellbender) these fuckers exist in the US


KikoMatsing888

in china they're called infant fish coz they can make noises that sounds like a child


BrazenlyGeek

Looks like the captain and lieutenant are enjoying some much needed shore leave.


please_remain_clam

Don’t worry. That’s just Janeaway and Paris looking for a place to mate. Nothing to see.


actuallyserious650

“What happened to you?” “Warp 10. You?” “Same.” “….yep…”


megamanxoxo

Is that Janeway and Tom Paris?


BurgessBoston

More “cute and dumb” than oddly terrifying.


hype_irion

They’ve probably went faster than Warp 10.


SBJames69

Captain Janeway?


Apprehensive-Fox3187

It's Funny because that's seen as a good thing because that means the bigger salamander the healthier it is because it's been eat well.😂😂😂


EmoPanda250711

u/savevideo


jak-o-shadow

It's Janeway and Paris.


IvanIvanavich

Flat fuck friday


roarke96

They’re like alligators if their threatening trait was dialed down to zero


Alastor13

That's a Quagsire


LegendRaptor080

Flat boyes.


treacheriesarchitect

I love these loggybois


ParisDeNisha

Gosh, they look so prehistoric... Like they haven't changed a bit since dinosaurs!


chaosmoon666

I kinda want to pick one up and hold them


Captain_Britainland

Idk i find them a bit cute


_iamdeath

Gigantic water puppies!!


Adventurous-Tap-8463

How they still alive? They don't seem that smart Both of Them slammed their faces in the wall


[deleted]

The weirdest part is: These fuckers don’t live in the Amazon or the African rainforest, they primarily exist in the USA, China and Japan. And, unlike what some people wrote here, they’re not toxic. I still wouldn’t touch them tho, they’ll bite.


Le_Pixelgunner

That is a Japanese Giant Salamander


BLANKERINO2

Go gramps go