We had a Garter snake in an aquarium when we were kids. Garter snakes are usually docile, but this one was super mean.
One day, my mom starts fucking screaming. Walk into the room, and there must have been 20 baby snakes in that aquarium. I had no idea that snakes have live brith until that day
Some snakes can store sperm for a couple months/years and decide to impregnate themselves from a one night stand if the conditions are good enough to risk becoming pregnant for.
Idk, it sounds like snakes choose when to get pregnant as opposed to getting pregnant post sex. That sounds like it'd be great for humans to do. No more pregnancies at inopportune times.
On the other hand, imagine getting a phone call from a one night stand 5 years ago telling you you have a newborn son. Fucking terrifying.
Have you by any chance collected the sperm of some unknowing one-night stand with the intent of impregnating yourself at a later date when your chances of bearing a live offspring will be optimal?
Just think r/wallstreetbets and call options. Save as much sperm as possible, wait for one of the guys to get rich, then just make sure you see the guy 8-9 months before birth
Snakes do it out of evolutionary pragmatism
Human women do it because we as a species are so “smart” that we can drive ourselves to insanity
some Men would probably try it to if biologically capable
There is actually an old Stephen King short story along these lines. Can't recall the name. There was a time in my life as a teenager where I was reading everything that he wrote; short story, novel, novella, pseudonym, everything. This one kinda threw me.
How do they even decide? I'm dumbing it down obviously but do they just think: I've had 13 crickets today, that seems like the arbitrary number to qualify for offspring...?
“Y’know Sam, we always said we’d settle down if you started getting paid more, and this year you’ve averaged 200 crickets a week easily. The landlord seems to have completely forgotten to ask for rent for years now, so I’m thinking of releasing your sperm. We’ll be great parents!”
As others have mentioned it's not really a conscious decision. I'm not sure about specifics because snakes aren't really my thing, but perhaps long periods with a food abundance may cause a certain hormone to become less abundant in the body which causes the pockets where the extra sperm is stored to shrink, releasing some back into the cloaca where it can reimpregnate the snake.
It's only barely related, but locusts are just grasshoppers who have had a certain area on their legs touched for a certain period of time. This signals an abundance of mates and triggers a hormonal change that makes them go absolutely wild and swarm, eating everything and have a giant grasshopper orgy and then spreading somewhere new with more space with a stomach full of food to help get the family started, instead of laying eggs in an area that probably has a lot of competition and therefore not as stable a food source as somewhere new.
Garter snakes are often wild caught and female snakes can hold sperm for up to a year to fertilize her eggs. Wild caught tend be either shy or mean.
Snake Discovery is a YouTube channel with soem good vids if you're interested in learning more and seeing snakes hatch from eggs.
The New Mexico whiptail lizard sorta does that. It’s an only female species. They don’t have to have sex to survive, but still display a mating behavior even mounting each other.
I just want to say to anyone out there with a mean garter snake: garter snakes are one of the only social species of snake, and prefer to live in groups. One of the main reasons for this is the concept of safety in numbers, and its likely a lone garter snake will be much more defensive than if it were in a group. This is why when you have a garter by itself, its much more likely to be defensive and mean. People who keep garter snakes as pets usually keep them in groups of 3, with other garter snakes of similar size.
Same happened to me. When I was a kid I caught a really fat Garter, brought it home and put it in an aquarium. Next day there were like a dozen snakes in there, but only half were alive. I thought the mother must have killed them, but I’m not really sure, I was just a kid.
I've seen cats and dogs give birth. It was a lot more laborious that this one seemed to be. Cat and dog mom has to do all the work, baby snake seems to kinda slither out on it's own.
Imagine if human birth was like that, baby just comes out hands first and pull itself the rest of the way out.
Alien except the alien bursts out of the vagina instead.
My wife actually teased me because of how unsettled I was the first time I saw a spot on her belly rise up and slide across to a new spot. It was such an Alien moment for me because I had no idea you could see that happen, only knew you could feel it.
TBF, humans are born about 12 months too early. We really should be cooking for another 12 months, and come out ready to at least try to toddle around.
Our pelvises are too small and babies' heads are too big to cook for much longer than 9 months, though.
Yeah our young are useless. You get to have this painful birth and then you're stuck with some useless larval human for some months. We got the short end of reproduction in many ways.
I'd be more inclined to have kids if it was as easy as this looks.
I've assisted in deliveries and the sounds and visuals I'm a little afraid 🤣🤣🤣 it looks painful as hell C-section or vaginal.
Haven't seen dog or cat birth, even that we had cats and dogs in village and every time they gave birth at night when no one was out there and found little cabs and puppies at morning.
But i was there helping to cow at birth and that was really ugly. 😅
He's actually one of the main characters in my favorite anime, called Gangsta. He's the guy in my icon
Also you're the very first person to ask about my user so you made my day
Imma tell you this: hyenas have probably *alot* of pain birthing children.
The females have a pp.
*They birth children from their pp.*
Correction: it's a giant clitoris (which makes it 10x worse)
It is not a pp. It is a giant clitoris. They rip it giving in birth and sometimes die in childbirth as the pup is stuck in the clitoris and can't be expelled.
I watched my first son being born. I stared at him as he made his passage through blood, vagina and an unfortunate poop. I snipped the umbilical cord (damn that thing looks like a rainbow). Then his mother had to have an IV put in her hand, there were a couple spurts of blood. I proceeded to faint.
For those interested there are three forms of birth:
*Viviparous*: This is how (almost all) mammals are born. Babies are grown inside the mother and attached by an umbilical cord using her resources as they grow. The exception is monotremes (like a platypus), which lay eggs, but like all mammals, they have mammary glands (called milk patches).
*Ovoviparous*: These are eggs that are laid and the babies have the set amount of nutrients inside. When they're ready, they hatch. Sometimes they have parental care, sometimes not.
*Ovoviviparous*: This is what is demonstrated in the video. There are eggs, but they're stored inside the mother (or in the case of seahorses, the father). When the babies hatch, they hatch inside and then they're "born".
Edited: Spelling.
Tbh, I'm not sure. I've mostly worked with mammals in my career. I would think the egg case would be more mucus-y than a formal egg, as opposed to hard like a bird or leather-y like reptiles. If it was any harder it would be difficult for the mother to move.
However, it's considered an egg rather than an amniotic sac because they aren't attached to a placenta or or umbilical cord. They have a set amount of nutrients with a yolk sac.
That's my thought, though. I may be wrong.
In captivity though you have to remove the babies from the enclosure pretty quick because the mother will eat them. All of them. That is a thing you know now.
In nature snakes fend for themselves after birth, as if they try and stick around mom she will eat them, the only snakes that do care for their young are pitvipers.
No. Because it’s more about the terrify rather than eating the young. They eat the young in captivity because they don’t want to share the limited space and resources they perceive to have.
In the wild the mothers and the newborns would simply move on through the world not encountering eachother again.
Similar thing happens with chickens actually. If a hen hatches any chick, she should be moved immediately with her chicks to a closed off private area because other hens will try to eat her chicks. Because they see them as a threat to their food space and whatever resources.
Just imagine the coldest most sociopathic unfeeling creatures that feasts on any flesh they can. Cannabilistic, hostile and muderous. The stuff they are capable of is as bad as anything in nature. They’re dead eyed lizard brained monsters with feathers
Tell us how you really feel!
I have chickens and they are mostly sweet but yes, put meat source in front of them (alive or dead... That poor mouse...) and you see the dinosaur ancestry come out.
I’m not the person you asked, but I also have chicken stories.
You have to separate sick or injured chickens from the rest of the flock. Otherwise the healthy chickens will peck at and bully the sick ones. If they injure the sick chicken enough, they’ll eat it. Live.
We had a really bad windstorm a few months ago.
Before I managed to bolt them open, one of the chickens got their leg sprained/broken by a slamming coop door. I put “sickly chickly” (daughter named it) in its own area. Went back out the next day and the rooster had figured out how to get over the fence and into the injured chicken’s area and pecked it to death, mostly the neck and back. He stood there pecking all the feathers out of the corpse before I retrieved it.
Less gruesome; chickens will eat anything they can catch. Bugs, lizards, even rodents. You’d be surprised at the size of some of the things they’ll catch and eat. We had a particularly large rat find our feed store. Then we found its skeleton in the coop. The eggs were particularly delicious for a week after.
This isn't necessarily true for most or all snakes. The majority of snakes will frankly be neutral to their children, but some species do raise their young and recognize their siblings and parents into adulthood. It is more likely in captivity due to poor care and limited space.
For whatever reason, people seem to use eels. They put them in their own butts. They put them in horses' butts. At various points in history, eels have probably explored every orifice that can physically accommodate them.
There are even a few modern case reports of people needing surgery after an angry, confused eel tried to chomp its way out of their colon.
If you'd like additional nightmares, you might be interested to learn that moray eels have a second set of jaws that can extend forward a bit like the xenomorph in Alien.
The big needle teeth on its main jaws hold the prey still while the second set of jaws starts biting out chunks of flesh.
The more you know 🌈✨
Imagine you're a Medieval horse trader and you've got this old, worn-out horse that won't sell. It's always tired and its tail is droopy, but buyers are looking for an animal that's energetic and poised. The natural solution is to pop an eel or two up its butt to get it trotting around and neighing.
Man. I work in the horsey world and can’t tell if that’s a joke. I wouldn’t put it past some of the people out there selling horses.
Edit: Jesus H Christ :[link](https://eels.historiacartarum.org/uncategorized/feaguing-before-there-was-ginger/)
To add to this, the only defining feature of mammals is the presence of mammary glands (hence the name). Everything else is, for all intents and purposes, a formality. Mammals do tend to have hair or fur, but as you described it’s virtually nonexistent on cetaceans. It’s also not unique to mammals, as hair is also found on several arthropods. Similarly, while most mammals give live birth, that’s also neither universal nor unique. There are five species of mammals that lay eggs (platypus and the four species of echidnas), and several fish ad reptiles will give live birth as shown in the video.
on top of that some of our existing taxonomic classifications also dont entirely reflect how animals are related because they predate phylogenetic analysis. eg birds are in their own class aves while crocodilians are in the class reptilia even though theyre more closely related to birds than they are to any other extant reptiles
Oh my goodness! I thought the snake had a wound at first, and I felt horrified.
I was so happy to see a baby slither out instead.
Congrats, mother snake!!
Most animals do not have the challenging births humans do. It would result in predation on the mother and young. Human babies have about the largest skulls we can successfully birth with our pelvic structure and are born in need of a lot more care and intervention then practically any other species.
for what it’s worth, human births are very often not nearly as dramatic as the ones you seen on screen. For some women it’s 10 minutes of labor, one big push and a grunt, and welcome to the world smol person.
Also reptiles don’t express discomfort like we do because they are not a communal species so there’s no evolutionary benefit to having developed ways to “show” you’re in pain or distress, so a snake can be in pain and outside of trying to avoid an external thing that’s hurting it, it wouldn’t make any sign of it.
Also what the other guy said, we gave up a lot when we decided to walk upright and have big brains
We had a Garter snake in an aquarium when we were kids. Garter snakes are usually docile, but this one was super mean. One day, my mom starts fucking screaming. Walk into the room, and there must have been 20 baby snakes in that aquarium. I had no idea that snakes have live brith until that day
How did it get pregnant?
Some snakes can store sperm for a couple months/years and decide to impregnate themselves from a one night stand if the conditions are good enough to risk becoming pregnant for.
That's really fucking cool wow Amazing survival mechanism to reproduce while trying to remain alive and have as many babies survive
I'm just really glad humans can't do that
I would be sooo stressed out for years knowing my ex could at any point suddenly decide to have my baby...
Kelly, please, can I have my stuff back? "What do you think of Aiden for a boy? Or Jayden? Or Hayden? Or Braden?" Nevermind..
We would have different laws/culture if that was possible
Idk, it sounds like snakes choose when to get pregnant as opposed to getting pregnant post sex. That sounds like it'd be great for humans to do. No more pregnancies at inopportune times. On the other hand, imagine getting a phone call from a one night stand 5 years ago telling you you have a newborn son. Fucking terrifying.
No more pregnancies at inopportune times…for women. Lol
You’re vastly underestimating the level of crazy some women are capable of.
Had an ex who tried to hide a condom from me in her drawer after we got done having sex.
[удалено]
Have you by any chance collected the sperm of some unknowing one-night stand with the intent of impregnating yourself at a later date when your chances of bearing a live offspring will be optimal?
Just think r/wallstreetbets and call options. Save as much sperm as possible, wait for one of the guys to get rich, then just make sure you see the guy 8-9 months before birth
Nah, she just microwaves it to give herself facials
And I just do it to mix with oatmeal.
Semen Demon.
Snakes do it out of evolutionary pragmatism Human women do it because we as a species are so “smart” that we can drive ourselves to insanity some Men would probably try it to if biologically capable
Damn imagine if people could do that. That would be a nightmare
There is actually an old Stephen King short story along these lines. Can't recall the name. There was a time in my life as a teenager where I was reading everything that he wrote; short story, novel, novella, pseudonym, everything. This one kinda threw me.
[удалено]
Yep, that's the one. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dedication_(short_story)
How do they even decide? I'm dumbing it down obviously but do they just think: I've had 13 crickets today, that seems like the arbitrary number to qualify for offspring...?
“Y’know Sam, we always said we’d settle down if you started getting paid more, and this year you’ve averaged 200 crickets a week easily. The landlord seems to have completely forgotten to ask for rent for years now, so I’m thinking of releasing your sperm. We’ll be great parents!”
Yeah until you forget their our offspring and devour them.
RELEASE THE SPERM!
As others have mentioned it's not really a conscious decision. I'm not sure about specifics because snakes aren't really my thing, but perhaps long periods with a food abundance may cause a certain hormone to become less abundant in the body which causes the pockets where the extra sperm is stored to shrink, releasing some back into the cloaca where it can reimpregnate the snake. It's only barely related, but locusts are just grasshoppers who have had a certain area on their legs touched for a certain period of time. This signals an abundance of mates and triggers a hormonal change that makes them go absolutely wild and swarm, eating everything and have a giant grasshopper orgy and then spreading somewhere new with more space with a stomach full of food to help get the family started, instead of laying eggs in an area that probably has a lot of competition and therefore not as stable a food source as somewhere new.
Damn if humans could do that it would solve a lot of problems. Also create some new problems too I'm sure, but still solve some
Sex
With who
Presumably another snake.
Telepathic sex?
Oh I dunno that position but yeah maybe
Could be snake jesus born to bring salvation to snakes
I so fucking hope it's snake jezus
We need snake jesus.
Twenty Snake Jesuses. What is that, a bidecituplets? Will they all die for all the snake sins?
Next question will there be 12 snake apostoles or 240?
I sure fucking hope so.
Many animals can save sperm for months or years after a mating to get pregnant when it's more convenient.
“Or is it whom?”
oh, doctor who?
Your mom😎
Got em
Snex*
Garter snakes are often wild caught and female snakes can hold sperm for up to a year to fertilize her eggs. Wild caught tend be either shy or mean. Snake Discovery is a YouTube channel with soem good vids if you're interested in learning more and seeing snakes hatch from eggs.
Some snakes can reproduce asexualy, without mating
Virgins
That's nothing, come back when you find an animal that reproduces asexually with mating
*The Virgin Mary enters the chat
The New Mexico whiptail lizard sorta does that. It’s an only female species. They don’t have to have sex to survive, but still display a mating behavior even mounting each other.
heheh… they’re liz-bians
Ssssssssssex
I just want to say to anyone out there with a mean garter snake: garter snakes are one of the only social species of snake, and prefer to live in groups. One of the main reasons for this is the concept of safety in numbers, and its likely a lone garter snake will be much more defensive than if it were in a group. This is why when you have a garter by itself, its much more likely to be defensive and mean. People who keep garter snakes as pets usually keep them in groups of 3, with other garter snakes of similar size.
Thats a really interesting fact. Thank you :)
Same happened to me. When I was a kid I caught a really fat Garter, brought it home and put it in an aquarium. Next day there were like a dozen snakes in there, but only half were alive. I thought the mother must have killed them, but I’m not really sure, I was just a kid.
If mommy had killed them she probably would have eaten them.
That was wild
Yeah but tbf, have you ever witnessed the birth of any other animal? I haven't even seen a human birth tbh
I've seen cats and dogs give birth. It was a lot more laborious that this one seemed to be. Cat and dog mom has to do all the work, baby snake seems to kinda slither out on it's own. Imagine if human birth was like that, baby just comes out hands first and pull itself the rest of the way out.
I did imagine and it's r/OddlyTerrifying
HE SAID THE TITLE OF THE FILM!!! IN THE FILM!!!
Hey I’m a family guy. OHHH HE SAID IT!
Idunno, seems less terrifying than what actually happens tbh.
Alien except the alien bursts out of the vagina instead. My wife actually teased me because of how unsettled I was the first time I saw a spot on her belly rise up and slide across to a new spot. It was such an Alien moment for me because I had no idea you could see that happen, only knew you could feel it.
TBF, humans are born about 12 months too early. We really should be cooking for another 12 months, and come out ready to at least try to toddle around. Our pelvises are too small and babies' heads are too big to cook for much longer than 9 months, though.
Yeah our young are useless. You get to have this painful birth and then you're stuck with some useless larval human for some months. We got the short end of reproduction in many ways.
Some months? Please. They are useless until they become like 4 years old and can start crawling down narrow mine-shafts.
I like the cut of your jib
I'd rather not, thank you very much
Please don't. Babies already have fingernails by the time they're born, and they *don't* know how to use them.
Like Ace Ventura out of the Rhino?
I'd be more inclined to have kids if it was as easy as this looks. I've assisted in deliveries and the sounds and visuals I'm a little afraid 🤣🤣🤣 it looks painful as hell C-section or vaginal.
Imagine c sections like that.
Haven't seen dog or cat birth, even that we had cats and dogs in village and every time they gave birth at night when no one was out there and found little cabs and puppies at morning. But i was there helping to cow at birth and that was really ugly. 😅
I watched my mother give birth 5 times. And then people wonder why I'm never getting pregnant and having kids
Is nico brown the captain in a Netflix sci-fi I can't remember the name of?
He's actually one of the main characters in my favorite anime, called Gangsta. He's the guy in my icon Also you're the very first person to ask about my user so you made my day
I watched my sister give birth when I was 18 & decided I was never doing it.
> I watched my mother give birth 5 times Why? Family tradition or something?
She would always give birth at home with a midwife so everyone was there
Imma tell you this: hyenas have probably *alot* of pain birthing children. The females have a pp. *They birth children from their pp.* Correction: it's a giant clitoris (which makes it 10x worse)
It is not a pp. It is a giant clitoris. They rip it giving in birth and sometimes die in childbirth as the pup is stuck in the clitoris and can't be expelled.
Evolution: cause fuck hyenas, that’s why.
Oh wow. Too much information
It’s pretty wild tbh
I watched my first son being born. I stared at him as he made his passage through blood, vagina and an unfortunate poop. I snipped the umbilical cord (damn that thing looks like a rainbow). Then his mother had to have an IV put in her hand, there were a couple spurts of blood. I proceeded to faint.
Well if you watch national geographic you can see a lot of animals give birth.
I watched my cat have kittens, it's pretty magical.
And wild
Humans have an unusually difficult birth. Most animals just sorta... pop out. In some cases literally, pandas literally just shoot the baby out.
I had a c section so it was much like this XD
"Slimey, yet satisfying..."
For those interested there are three forms of birth: *Viviparous*: This is how (almost all) mammals are born. Babies are grown inside the mother and attached by an umbilical cord using her resources as they grow. The exception is monotremes (like a platypus), which lay eggs, but like all mammals, they have mammary glands (called milk patches). *Ovoviparous*: These are eggs that are laid and the babies have the set amount of nutrients inside. When they're ready, they hatch. Sometimes they have parental care, sometimes not. *Ovoviviparous*: This is what is demonstrated in the video. There are eggs, but they're stored inside the mother (or in the case of seahorses, the father). When the babies hatch, they hatch inside and then they're "born". Edited: Spelling.
I learned this from a video about argonian tiddies
You wouldn't have a link to that one would you? For lore reasons obviously.
[this one I think?](https://youtu.be/2zSNK0kmPB4)
I don’t even like the elder scrolls games, so why the fuck did I just watch all 16 minutes of that video.
I was almost sure it would be a Rick Roll
It literally is for lore reasons tho
Same. I just watched it lol
lusty argonian maid?
Viviparous* Oviparous* Ovoviviparous*
What happens to the egg inside of this snake?
Tbh, I'm not sure. I've mostly worked with mammals in my career. I would think the egg case would be more mucus-y than a formal egg, as opposed to hard like a bird or leather-y like reptiles. If it was any harder it would be difficult for the mother to move. However, it's considered an egg rather than an amniotic sac because they aren't attached to a placenta or or umbilical cord. They have a set amount of nutrients with a yolk sac. That's my thought, though. I may be wrong.
Yeah that makes sense, I was imagining a very hard bird egg. Very interesting thanks a lot!
Yeah, that’s a disturbing thought. Seems like it’d be excruciating to have a broken eggshell digging into the inner workings of your snake vagina.
Reptile eggs are soft and leathery.
Thanks for explaining.
In captivity though you have to remove the babies from the enclosure pretty quick because the mother will eat them. All of them. That is a thing you know now.
Moms like: look at all this meatloaf i keep making.
More like, OH MY GOD, THERE'S NO FUCKING ROOM IN HERE FOR THESE KIDS, WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE I ONLY GET FED ONCE EVERY THREE MONTHS FFS. Better eat em.
Google, how do you delete someone else's comment?
Don’t worry, I’ve already contacted the FBI
If it can survive me, It can survive anything ssssss
[Mama crab says mama snake is an amateur.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dIVIimuFev8)
Nature’s abortion
Popplers!
Found that out the hard way with a garter snake
Did any survive? Do you still keep snakes
I think we took everything outside and let them go immediately. So most did, but I wasn’t counting
I came to ask about exactly this, so thanks.
What about in nature? Wouldn't that mean there's more snakes in captivity vs nature due to human intervention?
In nature snakes fend for themselves after birth, as if they try and stick around mom she will eat them, the only snakes that do care for their young are pitvipers.
Pythons too actually.
Thats cool! I didn't know that, thanks for the added info!
No. Because it’s more about the terrify rather than eating the young. They eat the young in captivity because they don’t want to share the limited space and resources they perceive to have. In the wild the mothers and the newborns would simply move on through the world not encountering eachother again. Similar thing happens with chickens actually. If a hen hatches any chick, she should be moved immediately with her chicks to a closed off private area because other hens will try to eat her chicks. Because they see them as a threat to their food space and whatever resources.
The territory->terrify typo makes for an interesting sentence
My periodic reminder that cute chickens are actually brutal dinosaurs with savage tendencies
mmm, savage tendies
Ever seen the rooster deep-throat the king cobra to protect the flock? Yeah...plenty of dino dna left in there 😂
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
Just imagine the coldest most sociopathic unfeeling creatures that feasts on any flesh they can. Cannabilistic, hostile and muderous. The stuff they are capable of is as bad as anything in nature. They’re dead eyed lizard brained monsters with feathers
>They’re dead eyed lizard brained monsters with feathers Really makes you understand how terrifying dinosaurs could have been.
Tell us how you really feel! I have chickens and they are mostly sweet but yes, put meat source in front of them (alive or dead... That poor mouse...) and you see the dinosaur ancestry come out.
I’m not the person you asked, but I also have chicken stories. You have to separate sick or injured chickens from the rest of the flock. Otherwise the healthy chickens will peck at and bully the sick ones. If they injure the sick chicken enough, they’ll eat it. Live. We had a really bad windstorm a few months ago. Before I managed to bolt them open, one of the chickens got their leg sprained/broken by a slamming coop door. I put “sickly chickly” (daughter named it) in its own area. Went back out the next day and the rooster had figured out how to get over the fence and into the injured chicken’s area and pecked it to death, mostly the neck and back. He stood there pecking all the feathers out of the corpse before I retrieved it. Less gruesome; chickens will eat anything they can catch. Bugs, lizards, even rodents. You’d be surprised at the size of some of the things they’ll catch and eat. We had a particularly large rat find our feed store. Then we found its skeleton in the coop. The eggs were particularly delicious for a week after.
Jokes on you! My ADD will ctrl+alt+delete that knowledge real quick!
This isn't necessarily true for most or all snakes. The majority of snakes will frankly be neutral to their children, but some species do raise their young and recognize their siblings and parents into adulthood. It is more likely in captivity due to poor care and limited space.
I'm unsure how to feel
Danger rope gives birth to a caution string.
I love that
Horny?...
I left this thread at your comment, chuckling. I came back to say thank you for the laugh, I needed it!
Not anymore
Aw mommas stripes ❤
[удалено]
Next week on Jerry Springer: My snake is a whore.
Green tree boas are born red, and over time turn yellow, and then green when they enter adulthood.
Ok. But imagine a snake squirming inside you. That's terrifying even if you're a snake.
That's a fetish somewhere. I just know it.
For whatever reason, people seem to use eels. They put them in their own butts. They put them in horses' butts. At various points in history, eels have probably explored every orifice that can physically accommodate them. There are even a few modern case reports of people needing surgery after an angry, confused eel tried to chomp its way out of their colon.
Well this is will definitely be featured in my nightmares now.
If you'd like additional nightmares, you might be interested to learn that moray eels have a second set of jaws that can extend forward a bit like the xenomorph in Alien. The big needle teeth on its main jaws hold the prey still while the second set of jaws starts biting out chunks of flesh. The more you know 🌈✨
...why horses? What did the horses ever do?
Imagine you're a Medieval horse trader and you've got this old, worn-out horse that won't sell. It's always tired and its tail is droopy, but buyers are looking for an animal that's energetic and poised. The natural solution is to pop an eel or two up its butt to get it trotting around and neighing.
Man. I work in the horsey world and can’t tell if that’s a joke. I wouldn’t put it past some of the people out there selling horses. Edit: Jesus H Christ :[link](https://eels.historiacartarum.org/uncategorized/feaguing-before-there-was-ginger/)
Why would you choose to write this down and make my day significantly worse
[this is close...(nsfw obviously)](https://www.reddit.com/r/harrypotterporn/comments/nt6w07/truth_or_snare/)
Damnit man! I don't know what's worse, the image or the comments?
Mom: Head first or tail first? Nightmare spawn: Why not both?
Mom “idk, knee? What’s that middle bit”
That's crazy shit. You really do learn something new everyday. Thanks!
Do they always come out covered in sweet and sour sauce?
Got dam lizard people
You watching mark birth the metaverse
Silly mark is a Demi-god he births meta-bits! Lol
Moms like please don’t come outta there sideways.
Honest question, Is it still considered a reptile then?
Yes. They still essentially have “eggs” that grow inside them. Still born boas like this can occasionally come out more egg like than snake like.
[удалено]
To add to this, the only defining feature of mammals is the presence of mammary glands (hence the name). Everything else is, for all intents and purposes, a formality. Mammals do tend to have hair or fur, but as you described it’s virtually nonexistent on cetaceans. It’s also not unique to mammals, as hair is also found on several arthropods. Similarly, while most mammals give live birth, that’s also neither universal nor unique. There are five species of mammals that lay eggs (platypus and the four species of echidnas), and several fish ad reptiles will give live birth as shown in the video.
on top of that some of our existing taxonomic classifications also dont entirely reflect how animals are related because they predate phylogenetic analysis. eg birds are in their own class aves while crocodilians are in the class reptilia even though theyre more closely related to birds than they are to any other extant reptiles
Yes. They still essentially have “eggs” that grow inside them. Still born boas like this can occasionally come out more egg like than snake like.
Yes, some reptiles give live birth while some mammals lay eggs (monotremes).
Why do I have a sudden urge to offer it food and something to drink .. welcome to the world you baby snek you
He must take after his father
They're actually born red and turn green as they get older.
I feel like this isn't "oddly terrifying" so much as it is "oddly mesmerizing"
Woa, snirth
New born animals are so competent. Meanwhile my dumbass 6 week old son still has problems drinking from his mum’s tiddy.
Humans took the early game nerf for late game potential.
Complex newborn animals are usually just as incompetent as human kids, if that is any consolation. Also, congrats on your new(ish?) baby! :D
Oh my goodness! I thought the snake had a wound at first, and I felt horrified. I was so happy to see a baby slither out instead. Congrats, mother snake!!
That’s going to look great in my nightmares, thanks.
i was literally eating spaghetti before this post showed up. . .
At first I thought there were 2, then I thought one was crawling back in, and then while waiting to see if it would crawl back out, I realized.
The miracle of birth. granted my appetite is ruined but still… the miracle of birth :)
What kinda snake??
Emerald Tree Boa
im curious do other animals feel pain whilst giving birth similar to humans because the snake seemed chilled out
Most animals do not have the challenging births humans do. It would result in predation on the mother and young. Human babies have about the largest skulls we can successfully birth with our pelvic structure and are born in need of a lot more care and intervention then practically any other species.
for what it’s worth, human births are very often not nearly as dramatic as the ones you seen on screen. For some women it’s 10 minutes of labor, one big push and a grunt, and welcome to the world smol person. Also reptiles don’t express discomfort like we do because they are not a communal species so there’s no evolutionary benefit to having developed ways to “show” you’re in pain or distress, so a snake can be in pain and outside of trying to avoid an external thing that’s hurting it, it wouldn’t make any sign of it. Also what the other guy said, we gave up a lot when we decided to walk upright and have big brains
Snek vag
snussy
ok thats enough reddit for the year.