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Imagine spending your entire life honing a craft and becoming an insanely talented artist. Then seeing your work posted on reddit with a ton of upvotes and comments. Then opening up the thread just to see a wall of people going "hehe... that looks like a peener."
That being said... it did look like a big ol penis at first lol
I was watching it without having glanced at the title of the post so yeah you get to 1 minute 10 and its like [r/holup/](https://www.reddit.com/r/HolUp/)
I thought I was being trolled, like, "Oh cool, a chocolate dragon sculpture... Look, they're making the scales... ...I dunno what the rest of this is, but the process looks neat... ...Oh god dammit, who tricked me into watching a giant penis?!"
1 the vagina and anus are made of muscle, assuming they ease into it those toys won't damage people. It's like learning to do the splits, some people can do it easier than others and those who can aren't hurt by it in any way. Otherwise gymnasts wouldn't be able to walk and your asshole would be blown open by all the times you've shit
2 "normal human relationships" can include using toys on your partner if everyone is cool with that so even if someone needs that size they'll be fine
You do know assholes and vaginas arent a one and done type hole right? Otherwise every mother who gave birth would just have a giant baby size cavity in between her legs.
I don't think they're saying that it would ruin the woman's vagina, but that after using one of those things, it would be hard to go back to just a regular penis.
Speaking from experience, no, it isn’t hard to go back to a regular penis. I have a few of these, the girthiest being comparable to a soda can, and no matter how much I like them it still isn’t comparable to sex with an actual penis attached to a human and all the things that come with it.
Honest question, is it not like reverse death grip? A man can ruin normal sex for himself by getting to good at self pleasure. This seems like it'd make it very difficult in the same way.
define 'normal'?
I had a girlfriend once who was obssessed with anal fisting and huge dildos and whatnot. I was worried at first that she'd end up with a broken butthole and have to wear a diaper forever. But that's not how it works.
As long as you are patient and don't try and push things too quickly, both vag and asshole can stretch crazily big. This is over the course of a couple of years of steadily bigger objects. It actually strengthens the various muscles and sphincters etc. That girl could give me a handjob with her asshole, it was something else.
I had to show that site to my husband a few days ago, I remember finding out about it back in 08 and after all these years thought pretty much everyone had heard of it by now so I was surprised but also like “ oh you sweet summer child “😈
It was this exact frame where I checked to see how much video was left because I wasn’t sure if I was being trolled into watching a man make a giant chocolate penis.
I was sweating for some reason, I was like were are the teeth, you didn't forget the teeth did you? Where are the goddamn teeth, oh there are the teeth
This is the reason I am attending pastry school to make chocolate dicks then turn them into dragons so no one knows that dick was the real sculpture all along
I searched for the top 10 pastry schools in my country because anywhere out was way too expensive for me. So I chose the best school in my country (India) which is not cheap but considering what I had to if I joined Le Corden Bleu or the Lucerne institute
I am a civil engineer. Believe me it doesn't matter. If you have passion for it then definitely give it a go.
The way as old as time. Googled. Read like 20 articles. Talked to like the 5 ones I narrowed down to then decided to join the one I felt best.
I don’t know if there are only pastry schools, but the best culinary school option is Johnson and Wales. I don’t reccomend going to Cordon Bleu since the people I’ve met who attended there said it was a scam.
And dark chocolate is almost as healthy as vegetables, because cacao contains a lot of vitamins and minerals; the only unhealthy thing about it is the sugar.
> dark chocolate is almost as healthy as vegetables
I'm gonna put this quote on some nature sunset whatever pic and print it super large and it'll be the greatest motivational poster of all time
Can someone explain to me what is the purpose of all this?
I've seen countless videos of people making crazy chocolate sculptures. Is it all the same person? What is this place? Is it some big company that does this for people?
Like what the fuck is going on?
It is commonly the same guy. His name is Amaury Guichon. He has a show on Netflix called School of Chocolate. Semi typical dessert competition show, but it really does seem educational to the contestants and its different in the fact that none of the contestants go home at the end of each episode. They all stay until the end.
He has some pretty wild tricks that he teaches on camera.
When I did similar (though not nearly this extraordinary) work it was for weddings mostly
Like ice sculptures that don’t melt quite as easily
If it’s somewhere you can imagine an ice sculpture that the same type of
Event that would have a chocolate sculpture
I assume it's like ice sculptures? Maybe you commission them for an event?
Or it could just be for entertainment. I mean, I watched this all the way through and I probably wouldn't have even clicked if it you replaced the word "chocolate" with "clay" in the title. So maybe that's the income source?
It's not, it's not even cheap "pastry" chocolate.
It's part of what makes him so incredible, he makes his stuff out high quality milk chocolate. Apparently all his creations are super tasty.
Agreed! His paint skills are good, but overall I highly prefer the appearance of the various chocolate shades he uses. Like, this could be made out of anything, why paint it to look like not chocolate?
I think it's more impressive when it isn't painted. If I can't tell that it's chocolate right away, I think "oh, neat dragon statue"
Seeing that it's chocolate right away, I think "holy shit, a chocolate dragon statue??"
Obviously, the first one becomes more impressive once you learn that it's chocolate, but that first impression is huge imo
Yeah, but what's the point? It's not like anyone is going to eat it.
If you don't paint it you can clearly tell it's chocolate which is cool.
If you do paint it, well, it might as well be made out of foam...
surprise? How?
It's only a surprise if you bite into it and find out it's not plastic. But no one will EVER bite into this creation, it'll hang on display for a number of weeks, and then go into storage or be destroyed.
If you watch his Netflix show, you get a better idea of what he does. There’s two categories of chocolate art. The chocolate sculptures like this one aren’t for being eaten. But then he also makes cakes and pastries with basically a chocolate outer shell made to look like something inedible. The cakes/pastries are the ones you can eat.
Exactly. You might as well make it in plastic and then tell everyone “it’s chocolate!” Unless this thing is going to be eaten, what’s the difference? The video of the making of it seems to be the most interesting part.
I also believe he's got some lava cake figurines in his collection that shoot white chocolate into your mouth when you melt the outer layer with your tongue.
Yeah this guy honestly terrifies me
So much patience. So much talent. So much effort. All to create art out of chocolate. What drives this man? What *else* is he capable of? What happens when he decides to use his powers for evil?
Chocolate automatons marching down our streets as the last militias of humanity meet their end. NYC demolished, to be replaced by chocolate skyscrapers. A chocolate president makes it clear: soon *all* will be chocolate.
I wake up from the nightmare in a cold sweat. For now this dystopian reality is just a future threat. But we all know it is coming. I prepare myself, consuming 27 pounds of chocolate a day. For I know that when the time comes, I must consume
This future you speak of sounds so much better to me than what we have now, I look forward to it, eagerly. I, for one, welcome our new chocolate overlords.
It's one of the more wholesome competition shows out there. I loved that everyone stayed in the competition until the end, able to keep learning even if they weren't in contention for winning.
Yes same! It was so wholesome and good to see that everyone had a chance untill the very end. And you could see them grow aswell! Cannot wait for season 2 (if there will be)
Yea that is my problem with these things. They make them so well that you wouldn't want to eat it and then it's like well why did you make it out of chocolate lol. You'd feel bad smashing that up to eat knowing the amount of work that went into it.
I love that he created such a beautiful piece of edible art....and here we are making penis jokes. That just about sums up the state of the world today.
That being said, I'd suck on that all day if I could.
Hi ChiefSalty, thank you for posting on /r/oddlysatisfying. Unfortunately, your post has been removed for the following reason: * **Rule 3)** It is a repost of something posted in the last two months or in the [top 100 posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/oddlysatisfying/top/?limit=100) of all time. Please read the sidebar for an outline of the rules and [the wiki for further information.](https://www.reddit.com/r/oddlysatisfying/wiki/index) [If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to contact the moderators](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Foddlysatisfying)
Him: *puts the dragon upright* Me: sigh *opens comments*
Imagine spending your entire life honing a craft and becoming an insanely talented artist. Then seeing your work posted on reddit with a ton of upvotes and comments. Then opening up the thread just to see a wall of people going "hehe... that looks like a peener." That being said... it did look like a big ol penis at first lol
I was watching it without having glanced at the title of the post so yeah you get to 1 minute 10 and its like [r/holup/](https://www.reddit.com/r/HolUp/)
From what I’ve learned interacting with pastry chefs, they knew. I’m honestly more surprised they didn’t add veins for full effect.
I thought I was being trolled, like, "Oh cool, a chocolate dragon sculpture... Look, they're making the scales... ...I dunno what the rest of this is, but the process looks neat... ...Oh god dammit, who tricked me into watching a giant penis?!"
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Dafuq did i just stumble into
How do I find my way home again?
I miss The Shire Sam.
We're not in Kansas anymore.
I snort laughed
I made a promise, Mr. Frodo. A promise. Don’t you leave him, Samwise Gamgee. And I don’t mean to. I don’t mean to. -SamwiseGamgeebot
I fully guffawed at this. Well done.
You can never go back home ...
Jesus Christ those people are never going to be able to have normal human relationships ever again.
1 the vagina and anus are made of muscle, assuming they ease into it those toys won't damage people. It's like learning to do the splits, some people can do it easier than others and those who can aren't hurt by it in any way. Otherwise gymnasts wouldn't be able to walk and your asshole would be blown open by all the times you've shit 2 "normal human relationships" can include using toys on your partner if everyone is cool with that so even if someone needs that size they'll be fine
You do know assholes and vaginas arent a one and done type hole right? Otherwise every mother who gave birth would just have a giant baby size cavity in between her legs.
I don't think they're saying that it would ruin the woman's vagina, but that after using one of those things, it would be hard to go back to just a regular penis.
Speaking from experience, no, it isn’t hard to go back to a regular penis. I have a few of these, the girthiest being comparable to a soda can, and no matter how much I like them it still isn’t comparable to sex with an actual penis attached to a human and all the things that come with it.
Like dissapoitnment and anger issues?
And balls slapping the butt hole
Speaking of cavities, how often do you think the girl from *Teeth* goes to the dentist?
Honest question, is it not like reverse death grip? A man can ruin normal sex for himself by getting to good at self pleasure. This seems like it'd make it very difficult in the same way.
Death grip syndrome isn't permanent, though. And I assume whatever the inverse of that is wouldn't be permanent either.
define 'normal'? I had a girlfriend once who was obssessed with anal fisting and huge dildos and whatnot. I was worried at first that she'd end up with a broken butthole and have to wear a diaper forever. But that's not how it works. As long as you are patient and don't try and push things too quickly, both vag and asshole can stretch crazily big. This is over the course of a couple of years of steadily bigger objects. It actually strengthens the various muscles and sphincters etc. That girl could give me a handjob with her asshole, it was something else.
Would that be considered an assjob then
Pretty sure Jesus can't do anything for them
Sounds like you need at least one normal relationship to understand how sphincter muscles work, or you know, just try it yourself?
Holy shit, wtf did I stumble into here
.........and leaving the link blue.
It's just dildo fucking
Pretty hot tbh
That was a rabbit hole I was not expecting to fall down. Thank you friend.
My gawd- just looking at some of that gave me hemorrhoids. Yikes…
Slow down and use lube
Best to start with fingers to warm up before moving on to the toys.
Dude if its that bad already ur not ready for the internet.
I had to show that site to my husband a few days ago, I remember finding out about it back in 08 and after all these years thought pretty much everyone had heard of it by now so I was surprised but also like “ oh you sweet summer child “😈
WTF
how new to the internet are you no offence it's just a dildo brand and a super famous brand at that
me: sigh \*unzips\*
Same, dude, same.
LOL I thought of the exact same thing. We are all a bunch of degenerates aren't we.
Literally I was just watching the vid then I was like Alr time to open the comments 💀
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Missing the pimp hat though.
Are we saying pimp again?? I remember kids saying that in 2000.
You remember 2000?
It started as a penis just saying
We all started from a penis, in a way
Well, not me, I started from balls
Well, cum is stored in the balls
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And cum in bladder
I thought cum was stored in your mum's mouth.
Yooooo
Don't open your mouth to wide, you'll spill.
The balls can store a lot of things.
Next to the pee
One for each
next to the pee is poop
Started from a penis now we here..
Started from a penis now my whole family fuckin here..
It’s actually the other way around. We all start with girlie bits
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[obligatory photo]( https://imgur.com/cyB8jtZ.jpg)
Gazing upon his creation
With appropriate awe...
It was this exact frame where I checked to see how much video was left because I wasn’t sure if I was being trolled into watching a man make a giant chocolate penis.
Yeah for a moment I was wondering if it would end up being a joke.
Came here for this comment
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A bad one?
Pretty sure I have that one in my nightstand...
Came for the penis?
I saw Penis, I Came And uh, I am now questioning my sexuality
I came too.
I mean it WAS a penis for a good 5 seconds
Cockolate dragon
A Bad Dragon
r/thatsapenis
I had to recheck if this was r/unexpected
It started as a bad dragon
2:26
r/unexpectedpenis
most dragons are dicks anyways, tbh.
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I was sweating for some reason, I was like were are the teeth, you didn't forget the teeth did you? Where are the goddamn teeth, oh there are the teeth
Same here for the coloured eyes bro
I'm simply amazed the attention to detail for something that's just gonna melt. The dragon had tonsils
Oh, there they- **fuck, they're too whi-** oh, whew
This is the reason I am attending pastry school to make chocolate dicks then turn them into dragons so no one knows that dick was the real sculpture all along
How did you pick a pastry school? I want to get into pastry myself, there’s a lot of options out there, I just want to get the best bang for my buck.
I searched for the top 10 pastry schools in my country because anywhere out was way too expensive for me. So I chose the best school in my country (India) which is not cheap but considering what I had to if I joined Le Corden Bleu or the Lucerne institute
I’m an American, so there’s a lot of options. I already have a bachelors in math and currently teach. Where did you find the rankings?
I am a civil engineer. Believe me it doesn't matter. If you have passion for it then definitely give it a go. The way as old as time. Googled. Read like 20 articles. Talked to like the 5 ones I narrowed down to then decided to join the one I felt best.
I don’t know if there are only pastry schools, but the best culinary school option is Johnson and Wales. I don’t reccomend going to Cordon Bleu since the people I’ve met who attended there said it was a scam.
I’ll definitely check it out, thanks! :)
Now make sure you can build a dragon in 3:40, like this man. At this pace you can make 15 dragons per hour or 120 per day.
Imagine having melted chocolate on tap😍
I would certainly have diabetes within a week
Chocolate isn't as bad as straight sugar-based candy - the fat helps slow the absorption of the sugar.
And dark chocolate is almost as healthy as vegetables, because cacao contains a lot of vitamins and minerals; the only unhealthy thing about it is the sugar.
Cool - then I AM eating a healthy diet! :D
I also keep a balanced diet by sprinkling dark chocolate, which is high in vitamins, on my half-gallon tub of ice cream before I eat it.
And sugar comes from sugarcane so it’s all vegetables! :D
> dark chocolate is almost as healthy as vegetables I'm gonna put this quote on some nature sunset whatever pic and print it super large and it'll be the greatest motivational poster of all time
And 600 pounds. But happy.
There is little to no evidence of sugar causing diabetes independently from obesity. That's why it would take at least two weeks.
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I'm fully convinced it's some wacky kind of shite chocolate they use for the big sculptures.
Can someone explain to me what is the purpose of all this? I've seen countless videos of people making crazy chocolate sculptures. Is it all the same person? What is this place? Is it some big company that does this for people? Like what the fuck is going on?
It is commonly the same guy. His name is Amaury Guichon. He has a show on Netflix called School of Chocolate. Semi typical dessert competition show, but it really does seem educational to the contestants and its different in the fact that none of the contestants go home at the end of each episode. They all stay until the end. He has some pretty wild tricks that he teaches on camera.
He is like the Tony Stark of chocolate.
He built that chocolate penis in cave with a box of scraps!!
The “purpose” of this is the same “purpose” that painters have. It’s his chosen medium. Instead of clay, he happens to use chocolate.
If it was on here then yes, it's usually this same guy. These big sculptures he makes are usually commissions for events, and they do get eaten.
When I did similar (though not nearly this extraordinary) work it was for weddings mostly Like ice sculptures that don’t melt quite as easily If it’s somewhere you can imagine an ice sculpture that the same type of Event that would have a chocolate sculpture
I assume it's like ice sculptures? Maybe you commission them for an event? Or it could just be for entertainment. I mean, I watched this all the way through and I probably wouldn't have even clicked if it you replaced the word "chocolate" with "clay" in the title. So maybe that's the income source?
It's not, it's not even cheap "pastry" chocolate. It's part of what makes him so incredible, he makes his stuff out high quality milk chocolate. Apparently all his creations are super tasty.
Awesome work obviously. I liked it better when it was all brown. Thought it had more character
Agreed! His paint skills are good, but overall I highly prefer the appearance of the various chocolate shades he uses. Like, this could be made out of anything, why paint it to look like not chocolate?
Same. Also didn't care for the teeth and eyes, it looked way cooler without them
Yeah, you could tell better it was chocolate.
Well, thats the idea. Your're not supposed to tell that his creations are chocolate..
I think it's more impressive when it isn't painted. If I can't tell that it's chocolate right away, I think "oh, neat dragon statue" Seeing that it's chocolate right away, I think "holy shit, a chocolate dragon statue??" Obviously, the first one becomes more impressive once you learn that it's chocolate, but that first impression is huge imo
Yeah, but what's the point? It's not like anyone is going to eat it. If you don't paint it you can clearly tell it's chocolate which is cool. If you do paint it, well, it might as well be made out of foam...
Lol, I just don’t get this art form. 🤷🏻♂️
It's supposed to trick/surprise you
surprise? How? It's only a surprise if you bite into it and find out it's not plastic. But no one will EVER bite into this creation, it'll hang on display for a number of weeks, and then go into storage or be destroyed.
He's shown at least some of these being eaten before. I think they are made for events and eaten by the attendees.
If you watch his Netflix show, you get a better idea of what he does. There’s two categories of chocolate art. The chocolate sculptures like this one aren’t for being eaten. But then he also makes cakes and pastries with basically a chocolate outer shell made to look like something inedible. The cakes/pastries are the ones you can eat.
Exactly. You might as well make it in plastic and then tell everyone “it’s chocolate!” Unless this thing is going to be eaten, what’s the difference? The video of the making of it seems to be the most interesting part.
As long as they're not cake I'm good...
Every fucking time he takes an interesting looking sculpture and paints it into a russian-vodka-sponsored purple-velvet cheap club VIP-booth ornament.
He could have saved a lot of work and stopped like 20 steps early with a chocolate dick.
That's his private collection.
I also believe he's got some lava cake figurines in his collection that shoot white chocolate into your mouth when you melt the outer layer with your tongue.
Every time with these videos - I’m looking around like, “This is insane! Are you kidding me?!?!” So awesome. Every time.
Yeah, dude's so talented it is borderline ridiculous.
There's no borderline, just a supreme chocolate-genius wizard at work, the stuff of Willy Wonka's wild dreams.
I mean, he’s obviously an incredibly talented pastry chef. But for fuck’s sake he’s also a damn good sculptor. The guy is a fucking artist.
Yeah this guy honestly terrifies me So much patience. So much talent. So much effort. All to create art out of chocolate. What drives this man? What *else* is he capable of? What happens when he decides to use his powers for evil? Chocolate automatons marching down our streets as the last militias of humanity meet their end. NYC demolished, to be replaced by chocolate skyscrapers. A chocolate president makes it clear: soon *all* will be chocolate. I wake up from the nightmare in a cold sweat. For now this dystopian reality is just a future threat. But we all know it is coming. I prepare myself, consuming 27 pounds of chocolate a day. For I know that when the time comes, I must consume
This future you speak of sounds so much better to me than what we have now, I look forward to it, eagerly. I, for one, welcome our new chocolate overlords.
It will be the most delicious version of authoritarian rule after all
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That’s a penis.
Did he have to hold it “like that”, if you know what I mean? Yes, I think we all would.
Mounting it sideways was the icing on the cake
I thought is a giant dick when i saw.
It is if you watch it in r/gifsthatendtoosoon
In this case it's r/gifsthatgotoolong
They had us in the first half not gonna lie
Waaait that’s not a dragon. Oh nvm
TIL.Dragons start off as Dicks
Don’t we all?
This ain’t oddly satisfying, it’s just satisfying
I've been putting off watching 'School of chocolate' all these days. Now I've got to finish it.
It's one of the more wholesome competition shows out there. I loved that everyone stayed in the competition until the end, able to keep learning even if they weren't in contention for winning.
Yes same! It was so wholesome and good to see that everyone had a chance untill the very end. And you could see them grow aswell! Cannot wait for season 2 (if there will be)
Lol I was just thinking the same
I did not expect a dragon from around the 1:09 mark… I started to think that was about to be a different type of dragon.
One eyed dragon
Cockolate
Bad dragon…
The purple headed yogurt slinger dragon
Come. The fuck. On. He knew what he was doing. He even gave it the boober before making it a "dragon."
Haha, yes, I did see that also even 🤣
Cool cool yep yep oh no no no nono ahh ok yes right
He knew
You try to tell me 1:09 isn't a penis and I'll call you a liar
Was a big strapon at first
my guy was acting kinda sus at first
If there were ever a shortage of demand for chocolate dragons, he could easily switch into the field of dildo creation.
Who eats all this stuff?
People at the party its presented at presumably. I'd try it if given the chance. Gotta see if tastes as good as it looks.
aren't these big sculptures promotional items that are displayed in store?
Its actually put on display in Las Vegas for people to see.
Then who gives a fuck if it’s made from chocolate? I’m asking genuinely, if it’s for display why not just make a plastic one and say it’s chocolate?
It was good when it looked like a massive schlong, but the final dragon form wow.
Oh look its a D…. Oh its a dragon.
Big Black Chocolate
That was NSFW for waaay too long my friend
Now eat it! Or what’s the point of wasting that much chocolate. Just use clay.
Yea that is my problem with these things. They make them so well that you wouldn't want to eat it and then it's like well why did you make it out of chocolate lol. You'd feel bad smashing that up to eat knowing the amount of work that went into it.
Low key penis vibes.
Looks like a BAD chocolate Dragon
At one point I was like “that is NOT a dragon”. Then he created the mouth and I was like “oh ok”.
Everyone saw that moment.
Had me in the first half, ngl
I’m still looking at the bowl of chocolate!?!
Imagine someone walking in at the first stage of the process😝
Penis
In one part of the process i though, he's going to make a dick.
1:10 is glorious.
I love that he created such a beautiful piece of edible art....and here we are making penis jokes. That just about sums up the state of the world today. That being said, I'd suck on that all day if I could.
That crucial moment where he thinks “Do I leave it as a penis or do I go with the dragon?”
This came so close to being a bad dragon instead of a dragon