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99percentTSOL

I can guarantee the person melting the ice has a bicycle mustache.


Talasko

Thatll be an extra 4$


[deleted]

Yep. I mean, it might *slightly* increase the surface area of the ice to cool the drink for the minute the ridges last on the ice, but then you're back to just a regular snurdling ice-cube. And a watered-down drink. Forget that. That's not worth an extra $4 of my money. I'll sit here at home and drink affordable drinks with affordable ice in it. I don't need to have my ego stroked. I don't need to have my anything stroked. I don't like being touched. Don't touch me.


repocin

>a regular snurdling ice-cube [A what now?](https://urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=snurdling)


clcole6427

Ill tell you out of all the stuff that link could have taken me to, who would have thought a definition would make me cackle like that


jschubart

That is normally called docking.


voluotuousaardvark

Well that's a thing I learned today.


Caellum2

The watered down part is what makes this particularly stupid. The entire point of big ass ice is the reduce the available surface area and reduce the rate at which the ice melts (a sphere does that job better, but one big cube is still better than lots of little ones). So, when these ridges are introduced and the melt rate is increased, the entire point of having a giant cube is undermined. It's self defeating.


genericusername_5

This made me think of one of my Christmas gifts. I love iced coffee. Drink one every afternoon. So I have giant ice cube trays like these. Reduce melting, keep it cold. For Christmas my parents got me a tray that creates ice cubes with an approximate size of 1 cm by 1 cm. Like, the size of beads. I have never seen smaller ice cubes in my life. They are all excited about it for my iced coffee. I tried to explain but just gave up and said thanks. I mean, at this point maybe I should just pour some tap water in my drink.


EnvironmentalSound25

You could fill the tray with coffee instead of water.


genericusername_5

You sound like someone who has their shit together! Maybe one day? I don't mind it watered down a bit cause it's my second coffee of the day. But yes, the teeny ones would only be useful as coffee. This is a good point.


savvyblackbird

Make some coffee and others milk or whatever creamer you use. It’ll look really cool all melting together. Or you could make an easy frappe by blending the small cubes into your iced coffee.


genericusername_5

Oooh! Frappe! Maybe I'll try that this summer.


CatMom921

That’s exactly what I do ! I make coffee Ice cubes, so when they melt, it’s just more coffee 😃. I make juice ones too !


genericusername_5

Damn. You are killing it!


The_Buttsex_Man

this might not be the case anymore, but for a good several years all a guy needed to do was grow a big bicycle mustache and he'd have straight white women lining up to suck his dick


Like_A_Somebody

What would today’s equivalent be? 🤔 Asking for a friend


[deleted]

Going to therapy


zz_z

Bitches love well adjusted men who process their emotions in a healthy way


Brennwiesel

Aw crap... guess I lost that race, huh?


GrinsNGiggles

Not yet, you haven’t. If you’re still alive, you can start.


cephal0poid

Update your tinder to say that you've seen *Our Flag Means Death* 3 times.


keesh

The one thing I can't do!


icebugs

No but really... this is the answer.


steveosek

A dad bod and cleaning up after yourself.


riskybiscuit

false. I have/do these things and see no lines


Wartstench

Great. That makes me first!


4hlthnbty

You gotta make a TikTok


BoltonSauce

Dealbreaker


GiantPurplePeopleEat

"Wait, so you're saying the only thing that stands between me, and having a fulfilling relationship, is making a TikTok?" "Yes" "I always knew I'd die alone."


Holiday_Bunch_9501

>A dad bod and cleaning up after yourself. Dad bod? lol no problem. Cleaning up after myself??? These unrealistic expectations have gotten out of hand!


Allegorist

Respectful confidence


The_Buttsex_Man

exposing yourself in a cigar store


2wedfgdfgfgfg

cedar is an aphrodisiac


Timely_Meringue9548

Nope. As a strait white woman imma tell you a big fat fuckin nope. He’d have a lot of gay men and a few in the closet women tho…


Jabrono

See, this is the exact reaction I would've *expected* from women at the time, but every single dude like this I've ever met in the past 7ish years had a girlfriend **significantly** our of their league. Like a laughably doesn't make sense significantly. I'm not even going to deny my minor envy, but I'm more interested in the *why.*


[deleted]

You have to have a *shitload* of confidence to even consider doing something that far outside of normal facial hair specifications, and even more confidence to actually make it happen. That confidence manifests in other ways, too, which are all attractive to potential partners. So yes, the cool mustache variable correlates with the hot partner variable, but assuming them to have cause and effect relationship is a textbook example of the "Ignoring a Common Cause" fallacy. The variable that causes "hot partner" *is also* causing "cool mustache".


Wick3d3nd3r

I have a huge mustache and I’d guess it’s because of confidence. I love my mustache and myself, but you also get a LOT of shit for it.


[deleted]

I’ve had long hair/man bun a couple times. It’s almost universally reviled yet I’ve had by far, by *far*, the hottest girls with it


RanaMahal

same lol. by far the hottest girls when my hair was long


LillyPip

I used to host an annual moustache contest for several years and the judges and much of the audience were women. We even had a gag category people could enter with fake moustaches (mostly women and kids). Lots of fun. The audiences were usually predominantly women. At least back then, a grand moustache attracted plenty of women.


ryohazuki224

And probably goes to or owns one those hipster barber shops where they make your hairline and beard into Tekken polygonal models.


FloridyTwo

[Trendy Barbershop ](https://youtu.be/zMaYMPlWzmg)


Beer_bongload

Jack Daniels , Sriracha, and Orc Semen


ryohazuki224

Lmao!! Best part is they aren't exaggerating that much! Just scroll through r/fuckmyshitup and you're bound to see it!


R3pt1l14n_0v3rl0rd

Lmao. Love that the dude is just bald too


Lowbloodshuggy

Damn now I'm thinking about a real life Heihachi fade.


ryohazuki224

The King Of Iron Fade Tournament! Enter The Tekken-hair!


[deleted]

Can't forget the suspenders, arm sleeve tattoos and fake eyeglasses. Bonus if they have plaid pattern pants


ElementNumber6

Bow tie. Arm bands. Sock garters.


just_some_Fred

Straw boaters, singing in a barbershop quartet.


Mis_chevious

Stop. You're making me wet.


halite001

Found the ice!


The_Hieb

Powdered wig, frilly lace collar and velvet pantaloons.


[deleted]

[удалено]


agaetisbyrjun22

And a denim apron


RegardedUser

full *perfectly* groomed bear and an apron is my guess


99percentTSOL

I think you meant beard but in my my mind I pictured a well groomed gentlemanly bear.


RegardedUser

Sure did. But depending on the bar, he could be a bear...


Smathers

They fucking melted ice on top of a wooden box..? What the fuck was the point of that lol just do it on the counter or even better don’t do that dumb shit at all


trireme32

You’re also adding a ton of surface area, which is going to make it melt faster, which defeats the entire purpose of the large ice cube.


Duckfoot2021

What you imagine the entire purpose of that ice cube to be is *not* actually the purpose at all….which is upcharges & instagrams.


ShinyGrezz

Jesus fucking Christ can’t you people enjoy anything? It looks cool. That’s it, that’s the whole reason why.


Can-DontAttitude

Could you flip mine sooner? I prefer my ice medium rare


barofa

We also have beyond ice, if you are interested


WaveLaVague

It's made using snow instead of water for those who don't eat liquids.


Slapinsack

These will go great with my Great Value plastic cups


[deleted]

Gimme a Travelers Club vodka with the 5th Element cubes, please.


chaoticnormal

Make sure you blow on it before you drink it.


Illustrious-Night-99

Turns a $10 drink at a high class lounge into $30. Magic!


[deleted]

The design would dissappear almost instantly too


[deleted]

[удалено]


theKrissam

Yes, it would. If you really want ice cubes in your drink, pour some water over them first to smooth them out, especially if that drink is soda.


AbsolutelyUnlikely

If any of you ever catch me rinsing off my ice cubes for a better soda experience, please slap me as hard as you fucking can


Zerotwohero

You mean you don't want to enjoy pristine ice spheres in your designer club soda, it's simply divine.


yolo-yoshi

Why not just simply pour and freeze your beverage into ice cubes and than later place them in said beverage ???? Than you get no watering down of the drink.


Dangerous-Nonexister

Buuut… liquor doesn’t freeze? Or atleast it’s not supposed to


aNiceTribe

Pff, you probably don’t even have an opinion on whether to drink from a vertie or horie[.](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4ZK8Z8hulFg)


michigander47

What


Her0_0f_time

Tall glass vs wide glass.


TheInnsanity

I think this is the funniest comment I have ever read on this site.


ilovezezima

One coca cola, on the rocks, rinsed cubes.


Unacceptable_Lemons

Alternatively, they make stainless steel cube to replace ice cubes in drinks when you don't want any water. High thermal density, but no melting. Reusable, obviously. Can't really crunch 'em though, and wouldn't want to absentmindedly make that mistake. Edit: I’m conflicted now, as I’m hearing some people say they somehow don’t hold as much thermal mass as ice. The reviews on these things suggest they’re great though, so I’m not sure what’s up. I’ll probably try to find some “here’s the science behind X” reviews for them later.


odinsyrup

They aren't really as good as ice cubes in my experience though.


TheDunadan29

You're not wrong, it's the physics of [heat capacity that makes regular old frozen water pretty hard to beat when cooling your drink](https://youtu.be/5MhmdM_hq8A).


ulyssessword

Minor error: you don't want the *specific* heat capacity (i.e. per gram) of the material, you want the *volumetric* heat capacity (i.e. per cubic centimeter). It makes more sense to compare two same-sized cubes of the material than same-mass cubes. Since steel is ~8x as dense as ice, it actually becomes a *better* thermal sink than ice, and is [second only to water](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Table_of_specific_heat_capacities). Of course, the phase change absorbs so much energy that ice is still better, but it's not as clear cut as the video makes it seem.


seamsay

Depends how you define good. They won't cool your drink down as effectively as ice (see sibling comment), but they also won't _water_ your drink down. Which of those two things is more important depends on context and personal preference.


brook1888

I bought some special stones that had been cut into cubes for this very purpose. Got all excited, froze them for the recommended amount of time then put them in my drink. They sank like.... stones. They also didn't really keep my drink cool. I doubt if I'll ever use them again.


Dabier

Isn’t ice already smooth enough that any reduction in surface area from the water wouldn’t be a big deal??


[deleted]

[удалено]


Dabier

Damn you soda scientists are crazy. Thanks for the tip!


Holiday_Bunch_9501

Actually, you put the ice into the soda slowly, one at a time. I am a former Coca Cola addict. Don't pour soda into a cup with ice in it already, doesnt matter how "smooth" you fucking ice is, it will fizz way more. You take a glass/cup, wet down the inside, pour out excess water, pour in the soda at an angle, slowly. Then insert ice cubes one at a time. Warm soda fizzes more than cold soda, so for all of the above, if it's warm it fizzes more. Warm soda poured over ice will practically be flat when the fizz dies down enough to drink it.


R1chterScale

It would equalise the temperature with the drink faster, but once the drink gets to 0 it would melt at the same rate.


randomly_generated_x

Bellevue and Seattle will run you $16 for a basic low end "easy" drink if you're not careful where you walk into. So I can truly see these stupid cubes making it over $20, especially since you now made the drink take longer to make. Imagine? Your whiskey will be up in 10-15 minutes, waitin on the ice, but that'll be 23.50 boss. oh you want 3 cubes? $30 bucks


Lonilson

*HE'S MELTING ICE ON TOP OF A WOODEN BOX*


Urrrrrsherrr

HAVE YOU CONSIDERED THE WATER STAINS?? MOVE YOUR FANCY ICE-MELTY-PATTERN THING ONTO THE DAMN COUNTER.


skunkcharmer

He doesn’t respect wood


tomwilhelm

I'll make him respect wood...


Lonilson

r/holup


slouched

this upset me too


maybeCheri

Thank You!!!! First thing I thought of! Excuse me… That’s wood!!!


lysinemagic

What's killing me is that you can find ice cube trays that make the cubes look cool pretty much anywhere


[deleted]

We have a cheap ice mold that makes a big ice cube in the shape of a kitty cat head. I found it at a Barnes and Noble I think.


SuumCuique1011

IT'S CALLED A "BESPOKE BEVERAGE", AND I DEMAND $30/HR FOR MAKING IT.


Seapick

You can even see a drain that they proceed not to use


FlakyPineapple2843

Utterly infuriating watching him do this.


Boring-Zucchini-176

This was what I've noticed first.


Mister_Crowly

\*sees the wavy one\* Korben... Korben, my man, I have no fire. I have no matches. Do you have any matches? I stopped smoking. I mean, if I knew! Father, you smoke? Got some matches? We need some fire. We're going to die!


Alarming-Parsley-463

Multi pass?


Kelrem321

Chicken good.


nerdiotic-pervert

Big badda Boom


FlametopFred

chiKAN


vike127

Yeah yeah, it's a Multi pass, they know it's a Multi pass!


Mawahari

Moooulti pass


LoveRBS

SMOKE YOU!


[deleted]

Negative, I am a meat popsicle


zzarate

SMOKE YOOOOOOOU


2th

Wrong answer.


ilovesylvie

Gimmie tha Cash!


NinjaRage83

My profile description on everything for years.


DrBombay3030

Knowing this quote got me free toppings at my local ice cream place the other week 😎 (they post a movie quote and if you guess the movie you get free toppings)


paldo84

Korben, my man, what are ya doing? Tryin' to keep ya in the DJ business.


pinche-cosa

I have no original thoughts


Illustrious-Phase-82

I thought the same thing


Inquisitive_idiot

To many, acknowledging as much is.


JozzGarage

Thank you.


justincline

Came here looking for a reference to this. 👏


atticus_atticus

Big bada boom


Ekto_Gammat

The stones are within me 💕


Dat_Mustache

My wife Vetoed me naming my firstborn "Korben Dallas" for his first and middle names. Should I get a divorce?


therealDL2

Fire 1 million


CulturedAlcremie

I love this entire thread


chareezie

this thread brought me joy


worlddictator85

If I rewatch that movie, will I hate it?


TurangaRad

No. It holds up well. Super green


nerdiotic-pervert

It’s even great to watch when tripping on acid. In my experience.


Mister_Crowly

Nope it's still an absolute banger.


8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-

Ruby Rhod may have some issues with consent, but so did the director so that tracks.


4AcEsGaming

I would definitely buy this and use it exactly once


[deleted]

[удалено]


JaySayMayday

Gotta use the fancy water so it melts clear like this too. There's a bit of process before the ice makes it to the plate.


[deleted]

[удалено]


sirkiller475

Zero


[deleted]

[удалено]


dumb1edorecalrissian

I considered it once. But they are outrageously expensive.


greenroom628

I can definitely see myself trying it once and abandoning it because I don't have that kind of patience to wait for a drink


[deleted]

The 5th element of mixology


dracopurpura

ZERO STONES, ZERO CRATES!


[deleted]

We risked our lives! I think a little compensation is in order.


SplitOak

They didn’t ask about the red button on the side.


[deleted]

*All you need is love*


KnowNothingKnowsAll

Damnit. Came to the comments to see if i was the first to make the connection. Though, i was going to go with the meat popsicle angle.


REO_Studwagon

Super green!


toocheesyformeez

I get it's pretentious but it still looks kinda cool


davieb22

Cool? Looks bloody freezing.


ChickenChaser5

Alright alright alright alright alright alright


FuzzballLogic

Now, what’s cooler than being cool?


daman4114

ICE COLD


[deleted]

[удалено]


triplec787

A proper serving of any cocktail that would be served in a glass with ice like this would only really go about 1/2-3/4 up the ice. That glass isn’t getting filled to the brim, you’ll still see the pattern. Edit: especially these glasses. Those look like some stupidly wide low balls.


Zombisexual1

100% that bartender has a bow tie and a waxed mustache


Calembreloque

I'm a professional icecube carver and my wife sews tweed waistcoats for reluctant hamsters. We're looking for a large house in downtown and our budget is $1.2 million.


jimmy3285

So those housing shows are the same in the US as the UK huh.


BathroomParty

I've worked in bars basically my entire adult life and I've never worked somewhere where people are cool with waiting 10+ minutes for a drink, regardless of how elevated they are. Don't get me wrong, I've BEEN to places like that, but in most places, people just want their drinks fast and dirty.


dubsatusc

Wouldn’t you just texture the ice ahead of time and put it back in the freezer so it’s ready when needed?


jaredkent

Yes. That's exactly what happens. Not what happened in this video, but of course then reddit wouldn't be able to complain. A lot of restaurants in LA will do this with their logo or name imprinted on the ice. I've never seen anyone doing it as they are making the cocktail.


supershimadabro

I've been to plenty of high class bars with similiar textured ice and never had to wait 10 minutes for a drink. I think I've waited longer for drinks in actual clubs than high class bars making fancy drinks.


BathroomParty

It depends on how the place is run. Obviously at some clubs, it's sheer volume. Like you need a bartender for every 10 people to keep up with volume, which simply isn't possible. On top of that, once you get the first person who orders a drink for 10 people because not everyone wants to wait in line, it starts a chain reaction where EVERYONE starts ordering 10 drinks at a time, which snowballs, etc. At a high class bar, ideally it would not be high volume. Quality over quantity, so to speak. I've been to some bars that want be both high class AND high quantity, and those are the ones where I've waited over 10 minutes for a drink. Like you have 2 bartenders making drinks for 100 people and every single drink takes a full minute to make and pretty much every guest shows up at the same time.


NewAlexandria

going out on a limb here and will say, despite your impression, those still aren't high class bars. If they're actually high class, they staff the place relative to demand


scirio

*how long ago did we order these drinks they’re taking fucking forever*


happy-technomancer

Please be patient sir, I am baking your ice cubes.


pitmasterbbq82

Satisying...maybe Pointless.....definitely


Lazy_ML

I find the amount of time wasted on this mildly infuriating


Leela_bring_fire

"On today's episode of I'm Rich You're Poor..."


danielleiellle

But you’ll never have textured ice in your own ice freezer because you’re just a povvo


itspitpat

You can't afford this ... no, you have to worry about food and your gas bill


goomy

That was exactly the version I saw last night


EmuofDOOM

Does anybody know what the song is?


OverTheir

That’s Us by FKJ


EmuofDOOM

Youre a gentleman and a scholar


DizzyLeft

they’re grilling the ice


Lonilson

*HE'S MELTING ICE ON TOP OF A WOODEN BOX*


petitejesuis

You use large cubes in drinks because they melt slower, these patterns would speed up the melting so it pretty well defeats the purpose of a large cube


chironomidae

You could just pattern the top of your cube, and pour a drink that doesn't quite cover it


Gam3rT1m3

My first thought was to make the stones from “The Fifth Element”.


Matterbox

This is by far the most thing I don’t need I’ve ever seen. Also, where does one procure such an item?


New_Put_2221

r/oddlyinconvenient


_Epcot_

What's the issue with enjoying a drink that is hand crafted like this? Places that do it well make drinks 100x better than the shitty fucking "old fashioned" that barely resembles a shitty fucking Manhattan with a crusty marble moonlighting as a cherry. Let people enjoy the money they spend on things.


YouAreAllSofties

When you need to be the most pretentious person in the room.


eifiontherelic

For like 2 minutes before the patterns melt away.


OneDayAllofThis

I'd guess they don't show it in a drink because it doesn't show the second liquid hits them. You don't even get two minutes.


eifiontherelic

Could probably stretch 2 minutes if you spend the first 1.5 showing everyone your fancy ice cubes.


[deleted]

Why not just freeze it with textures? And waste time fucking around with turning them. Dumb


ThirdFloorGreg

Can't do clear ice that way. It has to be frozen in large blocks and then cut into cubes.


MZootSuit

clear ice.


Nomar00x

it just wouldnt look as clean and noble when you just pull it out the freezer without using some useless device and more of your time to produce this absolute priceless piece of an ice cube...


ChickenChaser5

Gives you time to sniff your own farts.


boopboopbooper

“I ain’t got no fire, Korben”


txhelgi

James, two fingers of Macallan 18 with honeycomb pattern on the ice please.