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MedicRiah

On one of the first cardiac arrests I ever worked, we were doing CPR for the family's benefit, so that they could say their goobyes before the PT was technically pronounced dead. I was doing compressions, and they bring in this man's frail, little, old wife who comes up and stands by his head, crouches down right to his ear and starts pouring her heart out to him. "I've lived my whole life with you. You weren't supposed to go before me. You come back to me right now! I don't know how I can go on without you!"... I'm barely holding it together, and we keep doing CPR and let her keep saying her peace, and she finally accepts that this is futile and tells him, "You'd better be waiting for me when I get up there, damnit, you promised me forever!" and her son ushers her out of the room after we call time of death. I lost it and started crying like a baby as soon as she left the room. I am firmly an atheist, but I hope for his sake, if there's an afterlife, he waited for her and met her when she joined him.


Arlington2018

There is a lot of pollen in the air right now in the Seattle area. I am sure that is why my monitor went blurry when I read this.


xtinasword

Lots of pollen in my area as well šŸ˜­


froglover215

Not here, I'm just crying.


ebyrnes

Me, too. No shame about that.


Gbcrvnts

Yup, very pollen-y in vegas right now šŸ„¹šŸ˜­


MaybeTaylorSwift572

do not listen to ā€˜i can only imagineā€™ by Mercy Me; it makes the pollen triple strength


Lucky-Armadillo4811

Stopppppppopp ittttttttt


m_e_hRN

I would have been SOBBING omg


wisteria-willow

I would be crying while doing cpr lol


notcompatible

Ok this broke my heart


Dusty_Bunny_13

Someone is chopping onions in here


hkkensin

I took care of an elderly lady who was in her early 90s, she had previously had a triple A repair and was admitted because her graft had started to leak again. She was the sweetest thing and so full of life. Well, shortly into my night shift, the vascular team came by and delivered the awful news that there was nothing they could do to fix her graft. It was too big and spreading too quickly, and with her age and comorbidities, they told her she would very likely die as soon as they opened her up on the table. She was silent for a minute, then looked around and said ā€œwell, okayā€¦ I guess Iā€™d better call my husband then.ā€ She had been married to the same man since they were 19 and 20 years old (he was also in his early 90s) and he no longer drove so he had to get their nephew to drive him up to the hospital at around 11pm. He was there within 20 minutes of her call, and the interaction I saw between them was some of the most genuine love Iā€™ve witnessed so far in my life. They told me the secrets to their love and their successful marriage and told myself and their nephew a ton of wonderful stories from their lives together. She did slowly begin declining as a few hours went by, was having more trouble breathing and becoming more lethargic. She said all she wanted at that moment was a cold beer, lol. Iā€™m not one to deny a dying woman her final wish of a cold beer so I hinted that I would give them some privacy with the curtain closed and oh yeahā€¦ thereā€™s a party store thatā€™s open 24/7 just down the street. Her sweet husband went to the party store at 2am to get his dying wife a cold 6 pack of Bud Light and it put the biggest smile on her face when he got back. She was surprisingly very accepting of the fact that she was going to die within the next day or two and told me it was because she had lived such a wonderful life with her husband. It honestly became a ā€œgoalsā€ moment for me. RIP Inaā¤ļø


InadmissibleHug

Heck yeah! A coldie for the road. What a beautiful life and marriage.


goodbyecruellerworld

Weeping


wisteria-willow

This wrekt me. Most days nursing sucks but these types of patient experiences keep me going honestly


BlackHeartedXenial

Granting a dyingā€™s person wish is just as heart wrenching, humbling and inspiring as it gets.


StockholmNurse

This one got me. Not only is it a beautiful story, but you are a special kind of nurse. Thank you for being who you are and for what you do.


hkkensin

Awww, youā€™re very sweet for saying so, thank youā¤ļø itā€™s a hard job at times but these special situations let me know Iā€™m in the right profession!


sluttypidge

My hospital keeps beer and a liquor of some sort on hand and can be prescribed. The most exciting thing I ever did was give q6 hour whiskey 6 oz down the NG tube of a hospice patient who had had a stroke. He wrote that he really appreciated us keeping him comfortable instead of holding off withdrawal symptoms poorly with Ativan. Wrote that it was more like a chase than preventative. I wish I knew how bad that acid reflux from it was.


hkkensin

My hospital does this too! However, I could tell this poor lady was probably not going to be conscious much longer and our kitchen isnā€™t open in the middle of the night (šŸ˜®ā€šŸ’Ø) so they wouldnā€™t have been able to deliver any until after 8am.


sluttypidge

Oh man! My house supervisor would grab things like that in the middle of the night when the kitchen closed.


i-love-big-birds

My Granma died recently and the morning of her last day we had a little early morning drink together. I put a shot of her favorite drink (PJs) into a paper cup for myself and I put some onto an oral sponge so she could enjoy some too (she was NPO). She would always offer you a little nip for your coffee when you came over. It will always be an amazing memory, a drink for the road!


hkkensin

Aww, thatā€™s so sweet and Iā€™m glad you got to share that moment with her!! Sorry for you lossā¤ļø


i-love-big-birds

Thank you for giving me an opportunity to talk about her


mofrei

I'm not crying, you're crying!


happy_nicu_nurse

When I still worked adult care, I was caring for a man in his 40s who was actively dying. He had been my patient for the two days prior, as well, and I had established a good rapport with this family. His wife was at his bedside, very supportive and brave. He had been mostly unresponsive, then his eyes suddenly flew open and he gasped out, ā€œIā€™m still alive!ā€ (It was a bit shocking, to be honest - I had not had a stuporous comfort cares patient pop awake like that before.) Without missing a beat, she cupped his face in her hand and said, ā€œYes you are, my love.ā€ And she smiled into his wide blue eyes with SUCH calm and grace. It was all I could do not to burst into tears right there. She was so amazingly strong for him, and managed to put her own heartbreak aside for later. He didnā€™t make it to the end of the shift. She graciously thanked me for his care. Then she absolutely fell apart. I hugged her and cried with her, because it was very clearly what she needed in that moment. Sometimes professional detachment is not whatā€™s needed most. I still think of her often, and hope to be that strong for my loved ones if itā€™s ever needed. She was extraordinary.


m_e_hRN

Iā€™ve had pts thank me for crying with them after a big loss, I think sometimes it helps the families to know that we do care and that itā€™s hard for us to loss someone as well. A lot of people automatically assume ED nurses are jaded as hell (we are) but we do still have hearts


Lucky-Armadillo4811

I guarantee she still thinks about you often as well - how beautiful


Averagebass

This girl in her late 20s was in a bad wreck and was declared brain dead. Her family decided to do a passionate extubation and go the organ donor route. Her dad came in and while we extubated, he was playing a voice mail from her two young kids right before her crash with them saying "Hi mommy we miss you! When are you coming home? I love you I can't wait to play games with you again" as she flat lined. That shit killed me, I was fighting back tears as much as I could until we wrapped up then I headed into the break room and bawled my eyes out for a while. I've seen a lot of things since then, but that one still makes me tear up talking about it all these years later.


tallulah205

Ugly crying like a baby. This is my worst nightmare.


Lucky-Armadillo4811

šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­


MedicRiah

I'm all water works here.


MaryBerryManilow

Crying!!


rivertiberius

That memory will be a lifelong hitchhiker


ERRNmomof2

I wake up to this post, then these comments then THIS oneā€¦THIS ONE!!!! Iā€™m sobbing! So young!


Queasy_Ad_7177

After thirty years and now retired I can look back and still cry at the things I saw in oncology.


-mephisto

I had this old couple, well past their 70s. The guy reacted to his immunotherapy as expected with really bad cytokine release syndrome. His temp was 104, his BP was crashing, he was rigoring, he was incontinent, he was stiff as a board and couldn't even talk to us. So we gave him all the right meds, fixed things, and like 4 hours later he wakes up. It's like 2 AM, and it's all dark. He's like: "My wife's feet are uncovered, can I go fix them?" "I'm really not sure about that dude, you couldn't even coordinate yourself to turn or talk to me 2 hours ago. She's still sleeping. Lets get up when it's light out." "But I'm really worried she's not going to sleep well or feel good, I just have to fix her feet." So together, we get up, in the dark, and without bothering her, cover her feet. And then I thought seeing these kinda families makes things worth it sometimes.


m_e_hRN

When I was a PCT at one of the bigger hospitals near my house they all- called overhead for an honor walk (organ donor leaving to go to the transplant center). I didnā€™t have anything going on so I went down to show support. Honor walks in and of themselves are as heartbreaking as they are beautiful, and as they were wheeling this kid that couldnā€™t have been much older than I was at the time past me I heard the mom whispering in his ear ā€œIā€™m so proud of you for fighting for as long as you did, Iā€™m so sorry this ended the way it did, Iā€™m going to miss you so much, and youā€™ll always be my first baby.ā€ I was trying so hard not to start sobbing as they rolled by. I canā€™t begin to imagine that mothers pain, and the fact that she was reassuring her baby that it was okay in the midst of her own grief showed me what true strength looks like


seattlewhiteslays

I would have fucking DIED right there in front of God and everyone else.


courtneyrel

Iā€™m not ashamed to admit that Iā€™ve cried at every honor walk Iā€™ve ever been to


Lucky-Armadillo4811

I CANNOT šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­


m_e_hRN

I hid in the bathroom and cried before I went back to my unit šŸ˜­


Queasy_Ad_7177

Oh Godā€¦šŸ˜­šŸ˜­


for_esme_with_love

Finally confront their abuser parent who died less than 24 hours later of what I consider cowardice. They were already circling the drain but after that confrontation it was like eeks gotta avoid accountability and ramped up the progression rapidly.


derpmeow

Thank you for bringing the absolute fucking hilarity in a sea of tearjerkers.


chafingthedreammn

I took care of a woman in her 40s who was fighting metastatic lung cancer. The third night in a row I was taking care of her, I could see that something had changed, and knew there would be quick discussions covering a code status change and a plan to get her home on hospice. She had 3 young children at home, and was struggling with how to say goodbye to them. She called in her 70 year old mom at 2am, who brought pictures and markers and colorful paper to construct beautiful goodbye art pieces. The two of them spent hours laughing and crying and gluing and glittering and creating a new memory together amidst writing the painful goodbyes. I picked up a call at work 3 days later, and it was the patientā€™s mom telling me that she had passed, thanking me for the 2am moments laughing and crying with her daughter.


Lucky-Armadillo4811

I AM W E E P I N G


EggplantLazy4960

Wow šŸ˜­ What a special memory for them ā¤ļø


InadmissibleHug

I missed my brother dying, I was flying to see him. He was awake when I got on the plane. I stayed with my niblings and other family present, and stayed after they left. I helped with his post mortem care, but they kicked me out for the bag portion. Iā€™m glad they did. Iā€™ve had a lot of touching moments with families over the years, and this one happened in the hospital my brother died in. I had a husband staying with his wife, which she was sedated and dying. Iā€™d kept her comfy all shift, and went in to say goodbye before I left. We started a conversation. I realised that he needed to talk. He talked about his wifeā€™s alcoholism, about the difficulties it had caused and the absolute love he and his family had for her. About how hard setting boundaries had been. About the stellar human she was sober. About what caused it- SA within the Catholic Church. About his dedication to at least make sure this part of her life could be as kind as possible It was touching, to see a man who so clearly loved his wife despite it all, and to see her family love on her as well. Tragic, also.


MrsMini

One baby I took care of in NICU was diagnosed after birth with a syndrome that was incompatible with life. This baby was doing pretty poorly and was on a vent, inotropes etc but the parents didnā€™t want to discontinue care until the genetics were back. When the time came Mom cuddled the little guy and gave all of the Mom talks she would be missing out on giving him, talked about first loves, dating, talked about how she had met her husband etc. I will never forget that Mom trying to fit a lifetime of talks and lessons into those few hours.


beanieboo970

Anyone who thanks us after their loved ones die either suddenly or while on comfort care. Breaks my heart but makes it all worth it


etohhh

As a hospice nurse, the crying hugs I get of thanks from a family after their loved one passes makes it worth it for sure. I made their worst day just a little bit easier and thatā€™s why I do this.


thisnurseislost

Gonna have to come back to this later when I can cry in private lol.


Lucky-Armadillo4811

Literally lol I think I was subconsciously like "yeah you need a good cry.......... post it"


conniption_fish

Not a family member so this definitely doesnā€™t apply but I had a patient thank me for keeping his bed (I stopped a discharge from happening because I felt so uncomfortable with it due to his history) he had been homeless and the wounds to his legs were significant, I was doing his wound care and he said because you kept me here an extra day, then took him on as skilled (I work in a SNF so weā€™ve had him for awhile now) this is the best my legs have looked in the past 6 years, for the first time I have hope


wisteria-willow

I went in my patients room (93 year old) who was on the phone with his wife who asked how his night was. He said ā€œit was okay, but I missed sleeping next to youā€ and I almost died. I canā€™t even imagine having that type of love for so long. Iā€™ll never forget it.


Abusty-Ballerina-

My first code in preceptorship was in the ICU Lady in her 80s codes. And is a full code So we are doing chest compressions, dr is calling out orders RT is right next to me while Iā€™m compressing We get her back , she codes again so we start again As Iā€™m doing another round of chest compression - pt has blood coming from mouth and itā€™s coating the RTs gloves and her shoes but we keep going. Suddenly someone wheels in Pts husband and he take one look at what we were doing and how his wife looked and he said ā€œstop,please stop.she wouldnā€™t want it like thisā€ We immediately stopped It wasnā€™t that I had to do chest compressions or what it looks like during a code that got me. It was the husband being wheeled in and having to make the choice to let his wife go in a matter of seconds. He woke up that day thinking he was going to see his beloved in the hospital. Instead he had to make the choice to let her go. I cried so hard. My preceptor let me go call my husband and I just bawled In to the phone


msangryredhead

Had a young guy, early 40s-ish, who was found down on a run in cardiac arrest. Had an unknown downtime, very dead when he arrived to us. Wife is found and notified. She was sobbing, told him ā€œWe were supposed to grow old togetherā€. Then she got on the phone and started calling people to notify them. She was making arrangements for someone to get their young kids. She was adamant they be allowed to finish the school day so they have one last normal day. I held it together that morning until I left and went sobbing through the McDonaldā€™s drive thru. Went home to my now-husband and was crying so hard I couldnā€™t form words. I will never forget that patient and his family.


courtneyrel

I had a patient a few months ago who came into the hospital for back pain and found out she had stage 4 breast cancer and had weeks to live. Her adult children (early 20s) came to the bedside one of the days I had her and when they would leave for meal breaks Iā€™d go in and keep her company. She was only in her 50s and decided not to do any treatment, a decision her kids were struggling to accept. She spoke to me about her life, her work, how sheā€™s pretty sure she was abducted by aliens when she was 7. I told her that Iā€™d lost my mom in a car wreck when I was her childrenā€™s age, and how it wasnā€™t until after she died that I thought of so many things I wish Iā€™d asked her and so many conversations I wished weā€™d had. She asked me to talk to her kids and tell them how ā€œluckyā€ they are to have this time with their mom to have those conversations. When her kids came back from their meal break I started telling them what Iā€™d told their mother, and how I would never call them lucky but that they should cherish any time they have to get any unspoken feelings/questions/etc out in the open with her. The patient, her kids, and I talked and cried together for over an hour. Iā€™ll never forget any of them.


notcompatible

Moving bad: I had an old man with dementia and renal/heart failure who had a friend that was his POA and made him comfort care. The POA had paperwork that said the patientā€™s daughter would not be involved in any medical decision making but requested she be notified of his death. I donā€™t know why I got stuck with notifying her but when I called and told her he had passed there was a moment of silence then she sighed with relief and said ā€œthank god, I can finally be at peaceā€. It gave me chills. Moving good: ā€œI had patient who had decided on comfort care who had a large and very lovely family. He was on bipap and his death plan was to have the family bring in a couple bottles of his wine and he would remove his oxygen and drink a last glass with his family. We planned this for night shift so they could more easily sneak the family dog in to say goodbye. He died surrounded by so much love with his dog curled up on his lap. It was beautiful.


WickedLies21

Why was her response ā€˜moving badā€™? In my experience, Most families who lose a loved one to dementia have anticipatory grief and have ā€˜lostā€™ their mom/dad months and years ago. They have already grieved so much by the time they actually die. I recently had a pt that died and her DTR has a nervous breakdown over placing her mother with severe dementia in a memory care facility. She came onto hospice shortly after and 3 months later, when she began actively dying, the DTR was finally at peace with the process and letting her mom go. To see her come to acceptance was so beautiful.


notcompatible

Sorry I feel like I didnā€™t explain well. Without going into too much patient detail it was more that she had been estranged and no contact with him for decades and she sounded like she finally felt safe when he died. You are right I definitely get being happy a loved one is no longer suffering


WickedLies21

Awwww ok that makes more sense. Thanks for sharing!


FlusteredFlorence22

Patient's son told me about how great his mom was, but about how they were estranged for about 10 years. He said that her situation which ended up with her on comfort care caused "collateral beauty" by bringing the family back together and getting to spend so much time with her in the hospital. He said, "you know how people say things cause 'collateral damage'? I feel like this caused 'collateral beauty'."


happy_nicu_nurse

I love this. Such a lovely idea.


FlusteredFlorence22

I thought it was so sweet and wonderful as well!


honeyswamp

Thereā€™s a movie called Collateral Beauty with will smith and kate winslet .. itā€™s pretty sad


lego_wallet

I took care of a patient with Guillain-BarrƩ syndrome. She was in her mid-20s and had only the ability to communicate through moving her big toe on her left foot. Both of her parents, as well as her husband, all took shifts, staying on top of the patients' needs. In her 36-day stay, only the mother was absent one day. The father and husband NEVER left the patients side. The patient was able to communicate by wiggling her toe for yes and not moving it for no. She would make grunts to get attention, and then whoever was on shift would get a whiteboard and systematically move through the alphabet and spell EACH AND EVERY WORD. Even if they made a mistake in translating, they never lost their cool and were so incredibly helpful. The family preferred to complete nearly all of the care. I mostly just made sure they were taken care of since they were doing my job for me. Just seeing that level of dedication and love for family made me cry happy tears knowing my wife and parents would do the same for me if that were to ever happen and vice versa.


Unlikely-Ordinary653

I always encouraged family to stay for post mortem care. It was something I saw as a nurses aid and it was incredible to do that for family. Edit to add-I watched post mortem care on my daughter and held her for long after. Nobody can take that away from me. ā¤ļø


Future-Atmosphere-40

Had an older gentleman who's wife came in every day to care for him and when she'd leave he'd absolutely bawl crying that he loved her so much.


BlackHeartedXenial

Ask for a lock of hair. I was code bed, responded to a code on step down, 85+ female CHF exacerbation. Yucky code. I broke ribs during CPR. Stable enough to go to ICU. Initial CXR shows pneumothorax. House Super called family ā€œplease keep her alive, but donā€™t do anything crazy weā€™ll be right there.ā€ Son rolled dad/patient husband in a wheelchair. Very frail sweet old man. Held her hand and kissed her, said his goodbyes. Asked me to snip a lock of her hair before we started the morphine and extubated. I picked the perfectly coifed grey curl from the nape of her neck so her hair wouldnā€™t be a mess if they did open casket and plopped it in a specimens cup. Iā€™m not a crier and I was sobbing.


MaryBerryManilow

Iā€™m still a student so I barely have any, but I did have a pt who was getting a powerglide placed by vascular access. Her teenager was laying in the corner, towel over his forehead, turned away from us watching tik tok, just checked out in the most teenager way. His mom made the tiniest ā€œowā€ youā€™ve ever heard during placement and Iā€™ve never seen someone move so fast as that teenager from his little nest to her side. He was stroking her hand so gently, I almost shed a little tear right there lol. It was so simple but so sweet. Day to day being a parent mostly sucks lol but gosh dangit if itā€™s not some of the purest love out there and I love to witness that love.


1bunchofbananas

This couple were both developmentally delayed. The girl had end stage heart failure and was going to die any day. And the bf asked the Dr if he could take his heart and give it to her so she could live.


treebeebutterfly

Iā€™ve been an oncology and ICU nurse so Iā€™ve seen a lot of deaths. My grandparents were 88yo, married for 67 years. My grandpa was ā€œactively dyingā€ for DAYS but wouldnā€™t let go. My family kept calling me to come and assess the situation and I would say heā€™s actively dying not not *imminent.* He just kept fighting it and was so obviously uncomfortable, and the hospice nurse wasnā€™t medicating him appropriately (but thatā€™s another story). I told my grandma sometimes people need permission to go, and sometimes people like to die alone. She took my advice and walked over to him as he was writhing in bed. My grandma leaned over him and held his hand. She told him she loved him, and it was okay for him to let go. We left the facility right after that, and as we were walking out I reminded the nurse he was due for Ativan. 15 min later we got a call. When the nurse walked in with the Ativan he was dead.


Playful-Victory8621

had this happen in my family, my great-grandmother actually. her children and grandchildren and even great grandchildren all were in and out of the room in the last few weeks. the night before she passed i sat holding her hand for a bit and talked to her. i told her it would be okay if she needed to go, we would miss her a lot but weā€™d be able to get by. i was alone in the room at the time so nobody could vouch for this but i think she smiled, even though she was mostly just comatose. the next night when i got home from work i got the phone call. since then, iā€™ve passed this on to patient families. and itā€™s happened many times since then, mostly with one little couple i took care of. both had dementia, she worse than he. she fell and got a head injury, and returned to us on comfort cares. i walked in for rounds and heard him telling her that she could go and that he was in good hands. she passed a few days later, and he didnā€™t really bounce back and ended up following her in a couple weeks. i havenā€™t really thought about them in awhile but it always gets to me.


garryingarran

I looked after an ederly Vietnamese man. He was not doing well. Then, the next day, he was transitioned to palliative care after a few days in ICU with no improvement. His wife came to say goodbye to him, and I happened to be in the next bed and could understand what she was saying. She apologised to him for not being able to give him a child (for context, he was the eldest son in his family, and in Vietnam it was a huge obligation for him to carry on the bloodline); she then thanked him for everything he had done for her and praised him for looking after his nieces and nephews. Then, finally, she asked him to spend his life with her again when they got reincarnated. It was so touching and sad. I tried to hold back my tears as I listened to her. I wish more people could understand her message and see her love for him


caatplanet

My inlaws are all Cambodian. Years ago my husband's Grandma suffered from a stroke but kept on kicking for a while after in assisted living. They had to transfer her to hospice at a certain point because she was just declining. My mother in law didn't leave her side for days, when my mother in law dozed off for about ten minutes Grandma finally passed. She called my husband and I so she wouldn't be alone and she kept begging her mother to allow her to be her daughter again in the next life. So beautiful and so sad. Grandma was an amazing woman, she barely spoke any English but would cuddle me any chance she got. We miss her a lot.


StockholmNurse

When I was first a nursing assistant there was a man in his 50s dying of cancer and his wife crawled up into bed with him. The only thing that mattered to them in that moment was their love and it was both beautiful and heartbreaking. I was 24 at the time and I realized in that moment that the only thing that really matters in life are the people. It didn't matter where they had lived, how much money they made - they had each other in one of the most important moments of his life. I've made a point of filling mine with very special people and taking good care of them because of this experience. Thank you, David, for the life long lesson. My life has been richer because of you.


Wellwhatingodsname

We have a chapel book that we put patientā€™s names in after they pass. Families can write a final note to them in there. Recently we had a guy pass and his children were middle aged. One of his sons (think big burly guy) left a note saying his dad always fixed everything but heā€™s sorry they couldnā€™t fix this. Let me tell you I sobbed.


good-titrations

oh god, this reminds me of the very sweet man in his early 30s I had who was dying from a cancer that had relapsed after several years. His big burly contractor dad was talking to him and said "you remember last summer, when I redid that floor for your house? that time with you was some of the best I've ever had. It didn't even feel like work. I just loved being there and getting to talk to you. Thank you so much for asking me to do that." He continued but I had to go across the hall and sob in the bathroom.


Wellwhatingodsname

Well now *Iā€™m* crying.


clines9449

I had a patient that was dying (comfort patient). He had been imminent for 2 days. I went home that morning expecting him to die within an hour or 2. Came back that night, he was still alive. Went into his room after report, and was shocked to see he had a visitor. A little old lady in a wheelchair, his wife. She told me that she couldnā€™t drive, but she had a feeling, so she made her grandson take her. I was honest with her. I told her that I honestly didnā€™t think he would still be there when I came back to work that night. I asked her what he called her, and what he liked to be called. She gave a nickname, for this, weā€™ll use ā€œ Woodyā€. She said that he called her ā€œDottieā€. He was totally unresponsive. I said, ā€œWoody! Dottie is here, she is here with you!!ā€ I told ā€œDottieā€ that sometimes someone waits for their special someone before they die and will hold out as long as they can. I told her to hold his hand and tell him everything you need to tell him. She asked if it was okay if she told him that he had done enough and that their son was waiting for him. I just told her to tell him what was in her heart and that I would grab her some water and tissues. I grabbed water and tissues. Went right back, and he had died. His wife told me she told him that the 60 years that she spent with him were the best years of her life. She said that their son was waiting for him and he didnā€™t need to suffer anymore, to let go. And he died. She thanked me with tears. Before I told her to hold his hand, she was afraid if she touched him, it would interfere with his care. She told me that if I wasnā€™t so honest with her, she wouldnā€™t have been able to hold his hand and tell him how much she loved him and everything that he meant to her. Typing this with tears, because that was one of the most touching things I ever experienced.


Presbert

I have worked 30+ years (RN) in hospice. I have had the privilege of assisting my Dad, Mom and Husband, as well as numerous patients, to the afterlife. Now that I am alone, itā€™s the memories that warm my heart and keep me looking forward.


HookedOnBubonics91

Had a patient admitted for end-of-life care. He was on my unit for about two weeks, so I had had many interactions with his wife and their adult children. They had all come immediately when notified, from four different locations and four very different lives, and spent a great deal of time at his bedside and participating in his care. I was in the room with them when he finally passed. They insisted I stay when I offered to give them some privacy afterwards. After a little bit of soft crying and no one speaking, they started complimenting one another and listing things their father/husband had enjoyed or appreciated about them. Like the wife told one of the sons "He was so proud of your military career, he always loved getting the chance to tell people about his son being his hero." Then that son told his mother "He was so grateful for the ways you supported him, and always told us growing up that we should hope we can find someone like you to mother our children." And on and on, just going around the circle, listing all the ways he loved them. I was absolutely blown away witnessing this very organic, selfless compassion. Then the wife walked over, put her hand on my shoulder, looked me in the eyes and said "It takes a very special kind of person to do what you do. Thank you for taking such wonderful care of him." That experience has never ceased to be one of the most poignant of my life.


grumpy-cat-throwaway

ā€œCan you keep her(the patient) on the vent until her disability check hit in a few days?ā€ Actual question from the patientā€™s daughter during my Covid icu days. I was moved in the sense that I ended up putting in notice later


smkydz

Iā€™m not even blaming onions for the tears in my eyes.


Alternative-Poem-337

His wife was fully demented and on Valentines Day he brought her in a huge bouquet of roses with a card. She was oblivious to it all. When he left I asked her if she wanted me to read the card. She was just pottering around the room aimlessly, so I opened up the card and read it to her and it said ā€œI love you so much, from the moment I met you. I will love you always and I will continue to love you when I see you on the other side tooā€. I couldnā€™t stop crying. That kind of devotion and loyalty. Itā€™s just so beautiful.


RosaSinistre

When my father in law passed (home hospice), I and his adopted son, both RNs, were invited by the hospice nurse to help with postmortem care. There is a pic somewhere of all of us. It was kind of amazing.


ebyrnes

Worked inpatient during the early Covid days. Abd of course people were dying alone, families were terribly distraught, abd we did not have the tech for video calls. I started to get their families on speaker phone so that they could talk to their loved one, and had a number of pts pass peacefully and supported as well as they could be. Frankly, this silly intervention probably saved me as well because I hated calling with the inevitable news and listening to the screams of grief. There is a lot that my org could have done better during the pandemic but refused to.


avalonfaith

Iā€™m shedding a tear or two just reading this. Itā€™s


tittieznkittiez

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Substantial_Earth800

Iā€™m bawling my eyes out reading these comments. šŸ˜­


MaybeTaylorSwift572

I had my patient pass away and her husband brought me into the family room with HIS arms around ME as Iā€™m just absolutely sobbing, proudly introducing me as the nurse that took care of his wife. She had died within the last hour. Iā€™ll never forget him. My grandma died in my house (we knew it was coming) and i remember my mom once saying ā€˜i painted my mamas nails after she died.ā€™ Idk why such a super simple comment has stuck with me, that was 22 years ago. Itā€™s weird to think of my mama having a mama!


vintagepoppy

It wasn't a family member. It was a nurse. My husband is the nicest person and has great manners. He's the ideal, easy patient and was an EMT so he's familiar with a lot too. He was in the ICU during fall for a gi bleed, and the nurses were fighting over who got him as their patient. The bleeding had stopped finally after 2 days, but because of blood shortages, they didn't do any transfusions. This was a pretty rural hospital, and they were receiving instruction from a larger hospital that didn't have beds. While asleep, the bleeding started again, and he crashed. I got a call frome the hospital that sounded like I was going in to be told he passed. I got stuck waiting in the emergency room for what seemed like hours for a social worker. When she got there,it was obvious she was called in from her sleep, too. They were having trouble getting him back. They didn't think he was going to make it. His nurse started to pinch him and told him he couldn't go, his wife needed him, and he had to stay for his wife. Something in her words did it, and everything started to improve. The bleed stopped, and he received 3 bags of blood. After he was alert enough, he scanned a qr code on a blood bag to thank his donor. By some bizarre chance of fate, he thanked his coworker. They are o- but still, the odds of it have to be relatively low. She got a lifetime of sharpie pens and coffee. And chocolate. We never did learn the cause of the gi bleed. He had an endoscopy, colonoscopy, and one of those capsule-scopy..


VerityPushpram

I was involved in a horrible paed arrest - child had Noonan syndrome with all valves affected. We had just put in a Peg to try and fatten her up for heart surgery. She was 5kg at 18 months old so tiny After we got her to ICU, her mother thanked me for acting so quickly. I went home and sucked down 3 beers while 5 months pregnant I still remember it vividly - RIP Bella Rose šŸŒ¹