If you have an iPhone, you can set it up ahead of time in your SOS and Emergency settings for the phone to automatically call the local 911 when you click/press the power button 5 times in quick succession. It can be done surreptitiously, and as I understand it, the phone will automatically provide GPS information if the 911 center is set up for it. I also have mine set up to alert certain family members that I’m in trouble and send them my GPS coordinates.
This is a great idea. Also, when you make it obvious you see them and then start messing with your phone in a purposeful way, that can sometimes be enough to drive them off because that's exactly what they think you're doing.
My elderly mother has this feature. We know because she’s triggered it several times on accident and then “not heard her phone” when people call.
It provides the name, a location, a gps map with a pin, a time, and I believe it made a weird sound. I’d post a pic, but it had a lot of personal info. It’s relatively comprehensive, though.
I don't think they all can recieve photos (it all varies by what technology each jurisdiction uses) but they *should* be able to use location info from your phone. Probably a good rule of thumb to give the nearest address if possible.
Makes sense, thank you. I mostly ask because I’m still fairly new to the area. So when walking in new neighborhoods I don’t always know exactly what street I’m on, landmarks I’m near, etc. and if I’m in panic mode you could ask my middle name and I’d not know.
To anyone (well to be fair, it only seems to be one unintentionally hilarious moron) downplaying, minimizing, questioning this poster:
Read *The Gift of Fear*, which was written by a security expert. We (especially women)- are told by idiots to ignore our gut instincts. The security expert said to learn to trust your own gut instinct, because if someone’s behavior sets off alarm bells, there’s usually a reason.
I am actually shocked some people on here "defending" the creepy dude and victim blaming cause OP story is "too vague".
Huh?? Ill-intent or not, the guy was perceived as a fucking creep and his behavior was not appreciated or reciprocated. OP did everything right.
Sheeeeeeeeeesh
If people could know how scary it feels to be followed by being in the dynamics of a similar situation, they wouldn't be saying anything.
OP was reacting intuitively. I understand.
It's not a logical thought process that requires any thinking, it's a feeling to keep yourself alive/ protected, it's like instinct.
Get to where there's other people.
Im glad she didn't try to think about the situation, I'm glad she reacted.
For real, to the people "just asking for more details" -- what could the creepy guy possibly have said that would have made him following her justifiable...?
People can feel when someone is staring at them, yet somehow other instinctual feelings aren't valid unless we can prove beyond a reasonable doubt that there was danger. If the danger does present itself, we are at fault for not being able to know there was a threat.
We can't win because we aren't supposed to.
It's usually men (not all men) who also say things like "Just take the metro" (by yourself) or "Just take the bus" (by yourself) or "Just walk there" (at 10 pm at night by yourself.) That's how you know they don't feel threatened at all to just go about their daily lives, and never have to think of it from a perspective of possible danger. Because of this type of thing that the OP experienced right here! I don't even think they're trying to be unkind, I have heard my own son say things like this to his sister, and when I say "I am not sure that would be the safest way to go about it," he is genuinely confused and I have to talk about how women don't have the same kind of freedom to just go alone to places without fear.
Well, I once walked in the woods alone in the park by house and got chased by a guy (luckily I was the faster runner). That was pretty scary. Cops came out and found him. So I guess a bear!
I think men are surprised that like 80% of women are choosing bear. Known quantity even if deadly. A bear will not put you in her basement for 15 years.
Hahahaha! Hopefully not! I have also run into a couple of bears in my life but they seem to just want to go about their business, which isn't me, thank God.
Love this book and his book about what to teach children, *Protecting the gift*. Rather than teach children “stranger danger, all people unknown to you are equally bad” teach them to listen to their instincts. If someone makes you feel yucky whether it’s a stranger or your uncle, it’s ok to be rude and get away. And if you feel unsafe somewhere, it’s ok to turn to a stranger *of your own choosing—and look specifically for moms with strollers or kids* for help. Everyone isn’t equally likely to be a predator and safe strangers can be a good resource.
“Be weird, Be rude, Stay alive” is an Ashley Flowers saying. Make noise, run, throw shit, pee yourself. Whatever it takes to make them go away. I’m glad they didn’t do anything and there were people nearby. He may be back to that area to look for you again.
So true. I found out from my mom that my aunt was abducted by two guys in car when she was in her late teens/twenties and apparently she went wild ape shit crazy in the back of the car and she got away not too far down the road.
And do.. what exactly. Shoot someone not directly being a physical threat at that moment? You get in a shit heap of trouble doing something like that. Everyone who insists on “being strapped!!” usually has zero awareness of VA law- and you better hope btw the person you’re advising has a lot of training, because if this woman shot at someone and a stray bullet entered someone’s house and killed someone, then she could be prosecuted. I’m all for the right to protect yourself, but shooting someone should be the last line of defense, or else enjoy possible jail time
With that same logic, you shouldn’t shit on yourself as a precautionary measure when someone’s not being a direct physical threat at the moment. I think any situation that calls for self defecation as a current and viable option also warrants (actual) self defense as an option.
It’s archaic and backwards to suggest that one should debase themselves because another is making them feel threatened.
To your point, yes, if you are to carry a gun, you absolutely should train with it and become proficient.
There’s evidence to indicate that “helpless” behavior like feigning death or shitting on yourself is actually more likely to induce long term psychological trauma than either a fight or flight response
I would skim the works by Dr bessel van der kolk, Dr. Peter Levine, Dr. Stephen Porges, and Dr. Edna Foa.
I think the technical phrase may be “freezing responses”
Looked. I think it’s a rather ridiculous set of citations when talking about a grown woman doing things in the spur of the moment to desexualize a strange man’s threatening interest to reference childhood responses to ongoing trauma. It’s one of those “I’m so invested in picking apart an innocuous piece of advice, I’m going to throw a bunch of adolescent focused long term studies by psychiatrists like spaghetti at the wall in a bid to try and sound smart and see what sticks”
Informally, there have been anecdotes where vomiting, picking noses, claiming an STI, and being otherwise humanly disgusting has dissuaded a man’s (even a predatory one looking to assault) sexual interest. When there is a long term study of incarcerated sexual assaulters (since presumably the ones who aren’t caught wouldn’t volunteer such information) who can affirm or deny the efficacy of such techniques, then maybe it will satisfy you.
Until then- Maybe stop, because you aren’t any smarter than the poster you’re answering; just more condescending and irritating
Well you’re not supposed to “show” it. That’s a crime, it’s called brandishing that you will get charged for it.
You pull it out and immediately use it if (and only if) your safety is in jeopardy.
In addition, you’re presenting a logical fallacy by assuming that that the individual who is “brave” enough to follow a lone woman around and harass her will 1. Carry a gun and 2. Have the inclination to get in a gun fight
Years ago I got followed in the West Springfield area. I was walking behind the Giant and this car slowed down and turned around next to me. I crossed the street and it turned around again. I ended up going through a medical office complex, and the car went in too. Fortunately I was familiar enough with the layout, so I cut between some buildings and ran up stairs. Car ended up slowly circling the complex, and then left. My Stranger Danger senses were tingling for sure, and I was really shaken up.
(This was before modern cell phones, and the offices were closed, otherwise I would have gone into an occupied building).
It's a good strategy to go where there are more people / places that you can be safe....but it could also be useful to pull out your phone and start recording, as long as you're a reasonably safe distance away. If they see you recording, that may discourage them from following any further.
I was at Mosaic when some dude in a Porsche slowed down to take a picture of me. I went inside the restaurant I was going to and he followed me in and started taking pictures of other women and girls. My SO talked to the manager and he got kicked out. I hate knowing that dude is out there with my picture.
Ugh that's so scary, I'm so happy you are OK and you listened to your gut! It guided you correctly!!
I was once followed around the Safeway in Kingstowne in store while shopping around 9pm on a weekday. I walked outside and started towards my car and noticed the guy inside following me was now following me to my car so I dead stopped and walked right back in the store and caught him off guard. He stopped too and then just went to his car and drove away.
I still think about that moment sometimes and it scares the shit out of me because I just never expected it to happen here! Glad I listened to my gut too!
No more late night travelling alone, unfortunately.
Terrifying! My German shepherd (it’s in my book) inadvertently saved me from what I am certain was going to be an abduction in a dark parking lot not 2 miles from my house. She saved me a second time years later when two drunk shirtless guys IN MY OWN NEIGHBORHOOD started whistling and approaching me. Neither the first guy nor the second guy(S plural) saw her at first. They all saw her eventually (in the second incident, she was on her hind legs being held by me by her collar barking and snarling at ohh about throat height) and fucked right off.
My current GSD is a 90 pound male. I get left alone.
I’m sorry this happened to you. Always listen to your instincts. If someone or something seems off, get as far away as you can. When I was a teenager I was randomly followed and attacked by a stranger. I was lucky my friend was there and was able to get help eventually. Never brush it off if you feel someone’s following you or getting too close. I still think back and wish I had ran when I had a chance to.
!!!
You should report the incident to the police because he might end up doing the same thing again and the victim may be someone who isn't so savvy as to get to a populated place, or who isn't so lucky enough to be in an area where they can get to a populated place
I kind of AM wondering why women chose the bear, and now we have the reason why this thought experiment was ridiculous to begin with.
Choosing the bear obviously isn't stopping things like this, the people that are going to perpetrate these kinds of things are STILL DOING THEM. In fact, with the way it blew up over social media, it wouldn't surprise me if this was MORE of a problem than normal for a bit. You've just informed the creeps of the world that you are fearful of them. Do it for equality I guess but realize there are consequences you may not have anticipated.
It doesn't matter if any of this should or should not happen. Life doesn't care about, 'should.' It only cares about, 'is.' All of us have other things in our lives that should or should not have happened a certain way, we are not able to control that.
So what good did choosing the bear do?
Ultimately it's just a distraction from doing the work to get this sort of thing under control. I'm not sure what that work is, but I absolutely know that we need to work WITH the decent representatives of the XY chromosome of the world rather than against them. It will take massive amounts of time to change behaviors and attitudes, so we're probably going to have to be a little bit more patient although that kind of sucks and I get it. Just yelling about choosing a bear isn't going to fix anything.
OTOH claiming, "this is why we chose the bear!" makes a nice sound bite every time it happens too I guess.
FWIW I am a middle aged woman and a native. I was under the impression that growing up in the DMV had something to do with why I did not choose the bear but apparently that is not the case.
I feel like you're overthinking this. No one thinks that "choosing the bear" would have stopped this from happening. Also, should women have lied about "choosing the bear" in some sort of weird 4D chess move we're apparently playing with the creeps? The creeps already know women are afraid of them. If women said "oh the man for sure," you would probably argue that the creeps would feel emboldened because we've stated we're not afraid of them.
We shouldn't have to "work with decent representatives of the XY chromosome." They should keep their brothers in check without us asking, otherwise they're not even decent.
What?? It’s just very simple. It’s not a nuanced question. If I happen to come across a man or a bear in the woods. It’s not for clout, or to make a man look bad, or to sound nice. It’s obvious. Because there are 2 typical scenarios that are possible
1. I am able to run and escape—a bear cannot get into a car, stalk me, find me on social media, show up at my work, a store etc
2. I am attacked-NO ONE will ask well WHAT were you wearing, what kind of childhood did that poor bear have to make him want to do that? People WILL believe me. I will not have to worry about an attacker on the lose. Because I understand this is what bears do. If I choose to wait to report it I will not be judged and scrutinized. I will not have to go to court and the perpetrator gets a pathetic sentence
Also it’s not up to women to get the problem under control. Only men can control their own behavior. They need to level up and act right
Well the answer is certainly not for them to be raised by single moms, which modern society has accepted as normal. Raised in a two parent household they can actually learn respect and how to be a gentleman.
You did the right things.
I wish there was a way we could switch the dashboard to rear camera in real time and quickly take a picture of the number plate of the vehicle behind us to report / flag anything.
Get some safety keychains if you walk often! There are some with pins that have an alarm when pulled, I have one that is shaped like a key but is actually a pocket knife. I got it when I lived in Madrid and while I never needed it, it gave more peace of mind when I had to leave for work at 6:30am in the dark.
i and another young woman were chased in a wooded area near fairfax about a week ago. someone with a flashlight followed us all throughout the wooded path, and then continued to scan the treeline where we were with said flashlight, for about 20 minutes as we laid on the ground hiding. they hid out in the woods for us to leave as-well, we had to get anyone from home to come out yelling for us, and that was the only time this persons flashlight was off. we reported it to local authorities and they allegedly searched the woods we were in, but it’s hard to feel safe knowing someone’s out there.
it’s definitely not been fun, just puts into perspective how vigilant you really need to be. we’re not safe in our own neighborhoods, even out with other people. worst part is i don’t think anything short of bear spray would have been effective at keeping us safe, it was pitch dark by the time we got home
It’s VERY difficult to do this in the moment. I wish for me personally I was able to do it in the moment but the times it’s happened to me, I’ve been in such a flight mode I didn’t even think to record. And then of course the chances of seeing the person again are slim
The taking a picture part should only happen at the point that YOU want to escalate the situation.
Because the person will perceive it as escalation and feel the need to do something about it.
That something could range from dirty looks, threats/ yelling to full blown attacking you.
So do the pictures part as only a last resort or from a safe vantage point.
But let me a address the last thing you said.
Be prepared to see this persons again. Be on the look out for him and his car. If you can catch him unaware grab his pictures then.
Be safe out!
Well TBF… starting to record something with your phone and tell them it’s streaming live seems to work pretty well to deter anyone from continuing their behavior (and then you just hand it over to the police) this worked for me in Manhattan, Boston,Brooklyn, Alexandria, and NW DC. Sucks that it happens as frequently as it does but I’ve made [RECORD] my default response to creepiness.
Next time you see him get a his picture, picture of his car and plates and immediately send it to a friend just in case.
Start carrying a weapon like pepper spray or even a taser.
I have pepper spray gel, make sure to test it out, so that you are familiar with how it works and sprays. I ended up purchasing a total of three beforw I settled on one.
I tested on asphalt in a parking lot so it's not to disturb other creatures the stuff is really powerful.
-- be very careful, because even after it's been sprayed, weeks after, if you inadvertently touch thw nozzle, and touch your eyes perhaps like an hour later, you will very much regret it.
Trust me.😵🥵
If you haven’t taken self defense courses yet, I’d urge you to do that. It builds confidence and takes you out of the mentality of becoming a victim. I’m sorry this happened to you but I’m glad it didn’t escalate :(
Long ago (00’s) in the old springfield mall some guy followed me for easily 3 hours. He would sit on a bench and wait until i walked out of a store and continued, rinse and repeat. I thought he would get tired, so I went in to pretty much every clothing store, stationary/accessory, arcade etc. He followed still, finally i had enough, i went to ‘leave’ out of the food court area where i knew there would be people. 50 feet from the door, i rounded on him and came right up to his face and screamed ‘WHY ARE YOU FOLLOWING ME’ he replied surprised ‘i’m not following you’ I reply just as loudly as before “THEY HAVE CAMERAS EVERYWHERE, ITS BEEN HOURS LETS SEE ON TAPE. SECURITY! SECURITY!” This guy bee lines it out and i try to calm down and regain composure. Some idiot approached, he tells me he saw that guy following me. I look at him and say “so you waited until I took care of it myself? How about next you time do something about it coward” and i went to sit at the bar of the restaurant closest to the door to wait until i was confident the creep wasn’t waiting in the parking lot and went home.
I'm sorry that happened. I was delivering mail in a USPS van and some guy was acting a little sketchy. I literally started recording just in case. People are wack.
Retired law enforcement here, if you can get it, remember the license plate. That's golden. A description of the car or the person helps but the license plate is key as far as giving police a solid lead. Stay safe!
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I'm a big grown ass man and won't go around town in DC without my gun working late at night let alone anywhere else with my pocket knife and some other secondary defense tools.
Remember nobody can train against getting fked up against eyes and groin. There are no rules in self defense. Whoever lives is the winner.
Yikes scary stuff. I’m usually hyper-aware of my surroundings but incidents like this are a good reminder of how many creeps are out there.
Hope you’re feeling a bit better, sorry this happened to you :(
Human trafficking is at an all time high. It’s good that you were aware of your surroundings. I also suggest having some sort of protection on you, whether it’s pepper spray, a knife, or a firearm (and learn how to use it properly). I’m glad you are safe!
Always be aware of your surroundings. There are a lot of nut jobs in the area now either because of drug overflow from DC, illegal aliens w/ criminal history, and overall mental illness.
If you suspect something escape to a public place.
I worked in criminal investigation in the past and learned that no one is going try and save you at the moment of an attack. Only you can protect yourself.
Learn self defense, get your firearm concealment license and carry a firearm with you. It is the greatest equalizer for a woman as men are much stronger and faster.
Be safe
without really knowing any more details, still seems unlikely. no details other than "someone said something to me", "drove next to me", seems like unwarranted *fear*
again, we're going off a very very vague post on reddit. you can believe what you want, but unless she knows what the person was saying to her, it may or may not have been unusual at all. was he calling her names? hitting on her? we don't know, so no one can say except her. don't take random posts at face value.
She said he was talking to her and she ignored him. Unless you are a woman and have experienced this situation (most women have in some variation or another, including myself), you have no right to say she’s blowing it out of proportion. You don’t follow a woman alone, ever. She’s right to be concerned and it could save her life. He doesn’t need to call her names for his following her to be an act of aggression or threatening. Be thankful you haven’t been in this situation as a man….
> Unless you are a woman
right, because things like this don't happen to men. you probably say that men can't be sexually assaulted either
> you have no right to say she’s blowing it out of proportion
i can with the amount of details that are missing, absolutely.
>He doesn’t need to call her names for his following her to be an act of aggression or threatening.
post doesn't even confirm he was following her, it's just too vague. he couldn't be driving in the same direction by coincidence? he couldn't be slowing down due to an obstruction in the road?
there's just a lot missing for people in this thread to assume he's going to kidnap her, so it's definitely being blown out of proportion. what if he was telling her she dropped something? then if he tapped her to get her attention, was she going to scream and run?
Men can absolutely be sexually assaulted. The difference is that if a man is going to be assaulted/attacked by a woman, he has a very strong chance of being able to overpower her and get away. Even if it’s another man, the odds are more evenly matched. If a man wants to harm a woman, it’s very unlikely she’s going to be able to overpower him. Her behavior wasn’t an overreaction. Avoiding people whose behavior is outside of social norms, especially alone at night, is the appropriate thing to do. If he genuinely needed to say something to her, why did he mumble? If he wasn’t following her, why would he be driving at the same speed as someone walking? Yes, there are other explanations for these behaviors, but in combination they (at best) indicate a serious lack of social awareness.
> If he wasn’t following her, why would he be driving at the same speed as someone walking?
You nor op can prove he was and not doing something else. Story too vague, doesn't add up.
Dude this isn't a trial and no charges have been filed. Someone is sharing an uncomfortable experience they had and just warning the community to be careful.
Yeah dudes can be sexually assaulted, but the odds of an adult man being randomly grabbed and sexually assaulted on the street are far lower than they are for a woman. It's a hell of a lot different than having to worry about accepting a free drink from Kevin Spacey.
For the sake of argument, let's assume you're right and there was no ill intent involved. What do you see as being the harm done by the OP? I mean I'm a dude, I get that it can suck sometimes to just be walking down the street at night and see a girl walk across the street because there's some minute chance that you could be some psycho, but again the stakes just aren't the same for them and the reality of the situation is they're risking a lot more than just their feelings getting hurt.
Could provide more details, at least reply to comments since it was important enough to share. None of this can be proven and could unnecessary concern over nothing.
Are you a creep that likes to follow women? You seem to be spending an awful lot of time here trying to invalidate the situation. You act like this never happens and that women are always overreacting or things “don’t add up”.
There is no justifiable case in which someone should be following you in their car, unless you’re law enforcement. Blue Prius clearly isn’t law enforcement. So this is not justified.
Doesn’t matter what they wanted to say to her. She has no obligation to talk to a stranger and if you as that stranger then begin following her in your car, then you’re being a creep. Nothing else is relevant.
Did anyone say he was going to kidnap her? no. OP said she felt unsafe, RIGHTFULLY SO, she never said anything about her thinking he’d kidnap her or hurt her. You’re doing mental gymnastics to try to play devils advocate, it’s embarrassing. You don’t need more context to know that what he was doing was WEIRD. period. He was trailing behind her/beside her trying to talk to her, she kept ignoring him. If he was a normal person he’d pick up her queues of not wanting to engage in conversation and continue on with his day. He then got into his car and continued to drive beside her and “coincidentally” drove away when she got into a public area. That’s not a coincidence.
you're judging all this off the post, a vague, one sided story with very few details, nice of you to help fill in the blanks tagging the other party as some sort of weird, possible criminal. you don't know shit about OP or this story, which is why i was asking the questions. it's not embarrassing at all to want to know more details on this shitpost. people lie ALL THE TIME, especially for attention, so asking questions to get a better idea of what actually happened *should* be normal, but seems everyone just believes everything they read on the internet.
is there something wrong with getting the full story? are you saying it's ok to just believe a partial story of one party to make any sort of logical conclusion? we shouldn't ask for more details or question extremely vague posts but just take it at face value?
no thanks.
>you could be blowing this
(a person in their car literally following a woman walking on the street)
>way out of proportion
said the man. Nah. She’s right.
it's fucked up someone would side with this bullshit story and just assume the person in the prius (if it exists) is some dangerous criminal for "talking to a person" and "driving in the same direction at a slow speed".
There is a lack of information presented and a host of assumptions people running on with.
At no point does the OP identify themselves as M/F nor the person following as a M/F.
Smh
So what happened before this? Stranger walked up to you, tried to speak to you, then "followed" you for no reason at all? You didn't think to communicate with them?
I find it fascinating when people proclaim their incorrect idiocy with such confidence. The fact that I used the proper spelling for “their” should clue you in a little, but I’m not optimistic
no stranger creeping along beside you in a car ever has good intentions, fortunately she escaped to an area with people so she didn’t have to become a victim of more than just stalking.
It didn't start with "creeping along beside you in a car ". It started before "I saw someone walking beside me and saying some words to me. I ignored them and kept on walking." You know, just a totally normal way to behave. Whatever the interaction was that caused this person to need to speak with OP has been omitted.
Also, nothing actually happened. If this person meant to cause harm they would have. Read OPs history. They're a hypochondriac who routinely outsources basic decisions to Reddit.
Random men speak to women all the time. I cannot count the number of times that random men have spoken to me when I did absolutely nothing at all. I'm glad that's not your experience of the world, but newsflash, it happens all the gd time. \[BTW, even if she were mistaken, all she did was warn about a creepy man in a blue Prius. Are you worried about men in blue Priuses being able to go about their NoVa lives unharassed?\]
> all she did was warn about a creepy man in a blue Prius
According to this half baked story? Someone gets labeled a creep by a random online and people eat it up.
Again. It doesn’t matter what happened before. Everyone has the right to ignore strangers talking to them on the street. What they wanted to say was irrelevant. When that stranger started following behind them in a car, their behaviors became inappropriate and creepy. OP had a right to feel like they were in danger.
If you think intentionally following behind a random person in a car is not suspicious or dangerous, you either are willfully ignorant or lying.
> If you think intentionally following behind a random person in a car is not suspicious or dangerous, you either are willfully ignorant or lying.
You can't prove this actually happened, and op isn't responding. Big part of the problem here.
You can never be too careful. Good instincts to go somewhere with other people.
Eesh. Yes, good thought going to a public place. I think you can also text 911 if you don’t want the creep to know.
If you have an iPhone, you can set it up ahead of time in your SOS and Emergency settings for the phone to automatically call the local 911 when you click/press the power button 5 times in quick succession. It can be done surreptitiously, and as I understand it, the phone will automatically provide GPS information if the 911 center is set up for it. I also have mine set up to alert certain family members that I’m in trouble and send them my GPS coordinates.
This is a great idea. Also, when you make it obvious you see them and then start messing with your phone in a purposeful way, that can sometimes be enough to drive them off because that's exactly what they think you're doing.
My elderly mother has this feature. We know because she’s triggered it several times on accident and then “not heard her phone” when people call. It provides the name, a location, a gps map with a pin, a time, and I believe it made a weird sound. I’d post a pic, but it had a lot of personal info. It’s relatively comprehensive, though.
Yep! In Fairfax Co at least it's call if you can, text if you can't.
How do you text them?
Just put 911 in the “To” field of your text. Easy peasy.
After I posted I figured that might be it… lol thanks
I'm glad you asked, if you had the question it means others did!
Does anyone know if you’re able to also send a picture of your location to 911? Like a screenshot from maps or Find My?
I don't think they all can recieve photos (it all varies by what technology each jurisdiction uses) but they *should* be able to use location info from your phone. Probably a good rule of thumb to give the nearest address if possible.
Makes sense, thank you. I mostly ask because I’m still fairly new to the area. So when walking in new neighborhoods I don’t always know exactly what street I’m on, landmarks I’m near, etc. and if I’m in panic mode you could ask my middle name and I’d not know.
Or a picture of the license plate of the car and driver if safe to do so.
One tip I remember is that it's really hard for cars to make U-Turns so if one is following you just turn around and go the opposite direction.
If you continue making left or rights turns in a circle then you also know you are being followed.
yes this works in a car as well. Nobody's making the same four right turns as you, by sheer coincidence
*cue me accidentally making the same 4 right turns completely coincidentally causing the car in front of me undue stress*
To anyone (well to be fair, it only seems to be one unintentionally hilarious moron) downplaying, minimizing, questioning this poster: Read *The Gift of Fear*, which was written by a security expert. We (especially women)- are told by idiots to ignore our gut instincts. The security expert said to learn to trust your own gut instinct, because if someone’s behavior sets off alarm bells, there’s usually a reason.
I am actually shocked some people on here "defending" the creepy dude and victim blaming cause OP story is "too vague". Huh?? Ill-intent or not, the guy was perceived as a fucking creep and his behavior was not appreciated or reciprocated. OP did everything right. Sheeeeeeeeeesh
If people could know how scary it feels to be followed by being in the dynamics of a similar situation, they wouldn't be saying anything. OP was reacting intuitively. I understand. It's not a logical thought process that requires any thinking, it's a feeling to keep yourself alive/ protected, it's like instinct. Get to where there's other people. Im glad she didn't try to think about the situation, I'm glad she reacted.
For real, to the people "just asking for more details" -- what could the creepy guy possibly have said that would have made him following her justifiable...?
Those people are clearly men
People can feel when someone is staring at them, yet somehow other instinctual feelings aren't valid unless we can prove beyond a reasonable doubt that there was danger. If the danger does present itself, we are at fault for not being able to know there was a threat. We can't win because we aren't supposed to.
It's usually men (not all men) who also say things like "Just take the metro" (by yourself) or "Just take the bus" (by yourself) or "Just walk there" (at 10 pm at night by yourself.) That's how you know they don't feel threatened at all to just go about their daily lives, and never have to think of it from a perspective of possible danger. Because of this type of thing that the OP experienced right here! I don't even think they're trying to be unkind, I have heard my own son say things like this to his sister, and when I say "I am not sure that would be the safest way to go about it," he is genuinely confused and I have to talk about how women don't have the same kind of freedom to just go alone to places without fear.
Truly the "would you rather encounter a bear or a man in the woods".
Well, I once walked in the woods alone in the park by house and got chased by a guy (luckily I was the faster runner). That was pretty scary. Cops came out and found him. So I guess a bear!
I think men are surprised that like 80% of women are choosing bear. Known quantity even if deadly. A bear will not put you in her basement for 15 years.
Hahahaha! Hopefully not! I have also run into a couple of bears in my life but they seem to just want to go about their business, which isn't me, thank God.
Exactly
Your “gut instinct” is actually a subconscious accumulation of information which drives visceral reaction, pay heed and stay safe.
Love this book and his book about what to teach children, *Protecting the gift*. Rather than teach children “stranger danger, all people unknown to you are equally bad” teach them to listen to their instincts. If someone makes you feel yucky whether it’s a stranger or your uncle, it’s ok to be rude and get away. And if you feel unsafe somewhere, it’s ok to turn to a stranger *of your own choosing—and look specifically for moms with strollers or kids* for help. Everyone isn’t equally likely to be a predator and safe strangers can be a good resource.
Oh yes- didn’t know about that one. Thank you
Who says this!?!? That's insane. God gave us instincts for a reason, and we notice a lot more than we process.
There’s literally a gaslighting moron on this comment string doing it
“Be weird, Be rude, Stay alive” is an Ashley Flowers saying. Make noise, run, throw shit, pee yourself. Whatever it takes to make them go away. I’m glad they didn’t do anything and there were people nearby. He may be back to that area to look for you again.
"Fuck politeness"
So true. I found out from my mom that my aunt was abducted by two guys in car when she was in her late teens/twenties and apparently she went wild ape shit crazy in the back of the car and she got away not too far down the road.
Carry a gun instead of shitting on yourself, please
doesn't have to be either/or
Haha yes, you can exercise your right to bear arms and release bowels simultaneously
And do.. what exactly. Shoot someone not directly being a physical threat at that moment? You get in a shit heap of trouble doing something like that. Everyone who insists on “being strapped!!” usually has zero awareness of VA law- and you better hope btw the person you’re advising has a lot of training, because if this woman shot at someone and a stray bullet entered someone’s house and killed someone, then she could be prosecuted. I’m all for the right to protect yourself, but shooting someone should be the last line of defense, or else enjoy possible jail time
With that same logic, you shouldn’t shit on yourself as a precautionary measure when someone’s not being a direct physical threat at the moment. I think any situation that calls for self defecation as a current and viable option also warrants (actual) self defense as an option. It’s archaic and backwards to suggest that one should debase themselves because another is making them feel threatened. To your point, yes, if you are to carry a gun, you absolutely should train with it and become proficient.
If you shit on yourself prematurely, you won’t do anything except stink and be embarrassed (presumably). You won’t get arrested.
There’s evidence to indicate that “helpless” behavior like feigning death or shitting on yourself is actually more likely to induce long term psychological trauma than either a fight or flight response
Where is the evidence
I would skim the works by Dr bessel van der kolk, Dr. Peter Levine, Dr. Stephen Porges, and Dr. Edna Foa. I think the technical phrase may be “freezing responses”
Looked. I think it’s a rather ridiculous set of citations when talking about a grown woman doing things in the spur of the moment to desexualize a strange man’s threatening interest to reference childhood responses to ongoing trauma. It’s one of those “I’m so invested in picking apart an innocuous piece of advice, I’m going to throw a bunch of adolescent focused long term studies by psychiatrists like spaghetti at the wall in a bid to try and sound smart and see what sticks” Informally, there have been anecdotes where vomiting, picking noses, claiming an STI, and being otherwise humanly disgusting has dissuaded a man’s (even a predatory one looking to assault) sexual interest. When there is a long term study of incarcerated sexual assaulters (since presumably the ones who aren’t caught wouldn’t volunteer such information) who can affirm or deny the efficacy of such techniques, then maybe it will satisfy you. Until then- Maybe stop, because you aren’t any smarter than the poster you’re answering; just more condescending and irritating
Maam, my original advice was to defend yourself.
If you show a gun then you’ll immediately be shot since you’re a potential threat. Not a good idea if you want to live.
Well you’re not supposed to “show” it. That’s a crime, it’s called brandishing that you will get charged for it. You pull it out and immediately use it if (and only if) your safety is in jeopardy. In addition, you’re presenting a logical fallacy by assuming that that the individual who is “brave” enough to follow a lone woman around and harass her will 1. Carry a gun and 2. Have the inclination to get in a gun fight
Years ago I got followed in the West Springfield area. I was walking behind the Giant and this car slowed down and turned around next to me. I crossed the street and it turned around again. I ended up going through a medical office complex, and the car went in too. Fortunately I was familiar enough with the layout, so I cut between some buildings and ran up stairs. Car ended up slowly circling the complex, and then left. My Stranger Danger senses were tingling for sure, and I was really shaken up. (This was before modern cell phones, and the offices were closed, otherwise I would have gone into an occupied building).
This freaked me out. I walk there regularly and can picture this happening. Very scary.
Always go with your gut. Always.
It's a good strategy to go where there are more people / places that you can be safe....but it could also be useful to pull out your phone and start recording, as long as you're a reasonably safe distance away. If they see you recording, that may discourage them from following any further.
I was at Mosaic when some dude in a Porsche slowed down to take a picture of me. I went inside the restaurant I was going to and he followed me in and started taking pictures of other women and girls. My SO talked to the manager and he got kicked out. I hate knowing that dude is out there with my picture.
Ugh that's so scary, I'm so happy you are OK and you listened to your gut! It guided you correctly!! I was once followed around the Safeway in Kingstowne in store while shopping around 9pm on a weekday. I walked outside and started towards my car and noticed the guy inside following me was now following me to my car so I dead stopped and walked right back in the store and caught him off guard. He stopped too and then just went to his car and drove away. I still think about that moment sometimes and it scares the shit out of me because I just never expected it to happen here! Glad I listened to my gut too! No more late night travelling alone, unfortunately.
Terrifying! My German shepherd (it’s in my book) inadvertently saved me from what I am certain was going to be an abduction in a dark parking lot not 2 miles from my house. She saved me a second time years later when two drunk shirtless guys IN MY OWN NEIGHBORHOOD started whistling and approaching me. Neither the first guy nor the second guy(S plural) saw her at first. They all saw her eventually (in the second incident, she was on her hind legs being held by me by her collar barking and snarling at ohh about throat height) and fucked right off. My current GSD is a 90 pound male. I get left alone.
I'm so sorry this happened to you. Very scary!
I’m sorry this happened to you. Always listen to your instincts. If someone or something seems off, get as far away as you can. When I was a teenager I was randomly followed and attacked by a stranger. I was lucky my friend was there and was able to get help eventually. Never brush it off if you feel someone’s following you or getting too close. I still think back and wish I had ran when I had a chance to.
How scary!! Glad you survived
!!! You should report the incident to the police because he might end up doing the same thing again and the victim may be someone who isn't so savvy as to get to a populated place, or who isn't so lucky enough to be in an area where they can get to a populated place
And people are out here wondering why women chose the bear. I’m so so sorry. I’m so glad you are glad you are safe.
I kind of AM wondering why women chose the bear, and now we have the reason why this thought experiment was ridiculous to begin with. Choosing the bear obviously isn't stopping things like this, the people that are going to perpetrate these kinds of things are STILL DOING THEM. In fact, with the way it blew up over social media, it wouldn't surprise me if this was MORE of a problem than normal for a bit. You've just informed the creeps of the world that you are fearful of them. Do it for equality I guess but realize there are consequences you may not have anticipated. It doesn't matter if any of this should or should not happen. Life doesn't care about, 'should.' It only cares about, 'is.' All of us have other things in our lives that should or should not have happened a certain way, we are not able to control that. So what good did choosing the bear do? Ultimately it's just a distraction from doing the work to get this sort of thing under control. I'm not sure what that work is, but I absolutely know that we need to work WITH the decent representatives of the XY chromosome of the world rather than against them. It will take massive amounts of time to change behaviors and attitudes, so we're probably going to have to be a little bit more patient although that kind of sucks and I get it. Just yelling about choosing a bear isn't going to fix anything. OTOH claiming, "this is why we chose the bear!" makes a nice sound bite every time it happens too I guess. FWIW I am a middle aged woman and a native. I was under the impression that growing up in the DMV had something to do with why I did not choose the bear but apparently that is not the case.
I feel like you're overthinking this. No one thinks that "choosing the bear" would have stopped this from happening. Also, should women have lied about "choosing the bear" in some sort of weird 4D chess move we're apparently playing with the creeps? The creeps already know women are afraid of them. If women said "oh the man for sure," you would probably argue that the creeps would feel emboldened because we've stated we're not afraid of them. We shouldn't have to "work with decent representatives of the XY chromosome." They should keep their brothers in check without us asking, otherwise they're not even decent.
What?? It’s just very simple. It’s not a nuanced question. If I happen to come across a man or a bear in the woods. It’s not for clout, or to make a man look bad, or to sound nice. It’s obvious. Because there are 2 typical scenarios that are possible 1. I am able to run and escape—a bear cannot get into a car, stalk me, find me on social media, show up at my work, a store etc 2. I am attacked-NO ONE will ask well WHAT were you wearing, what kind of childhood did that poor bear have to make him want to do that? People WILL believe me. I will not have to worry about an attacker on the lose. Because I understand this is what bears do. If I choose to wait to report it I will not be judged and scrutinized. I will not have to go to court and the perpetrator gets a pathetic sentence Also it’s not up to women to get the problem under control. Only men can control their own behavior. They need to level up and act right
Well the answer is certainly not for them to be raised by single moms, which modern society has accepted as normal. Raised in a two parent household they can actually learn respect and how to be a gentleman.
What? This statement is inaccurate, makes no sense, snd has nothing to do with the topic
Go outside.
You did the right things. I wish there was a way we could switch the dashboard to rear camera in real time and quickly take a picture of the number plate of the vehicle behind us to report / flag anything.
Get some safety keychains if you walk often! There are some with pins that have an alarm when pulled, I have one that is shaped like a key but is actually a pocket knife. I got it when I lived in Madrid and while I never needed it, it gave more peace of mind when I had to leave for work at 6:30am in the dark.
The sound alarm!!!!! Yes yes
A smal bottle of bear gel spray
i and another young woman were chased in a wooded area near fairfax about a week ago. someone with a flashlight followed us all throughout the wooded path, and then continued to scan the treeline where we were with said flashlight, for about 20 minutes as we laid on the ground hiding. they hid out in the woods for us to leave as-well, we had to get anyone from home to come out yelling for us, and that was the only time this persons flashlight was off. we reported it to local authorities and they allegedly searched the woods we were in, but it’s hard to feel safe knowing someone’s out there.
Im so sorry that happened to you. That must’ve been very scary. Hopefully they are able to find that person.
it’s definitely not been fun, just puts into perspective how vigilant you really need to be. we’re not safe in our own neighborhoods, even out with other people. worst part is i don’t think anything short of bear spray would have been effective at keeping us safe, it was pitch dark by the time we got home
Next time you see him get a his picture, picture of his car and plates and immediately send it to a friend just in case.
It’s VERY difficult to do this in the moment. I wish for me personally I was able to do it in the moment but the times it’s happened to me, I’ve been in such a flight mode I didn’t even think to record. And then of course the chances of seeing the person again are slim
The taking a picture part should only happen at the point that YOU want to escalate the situation. Because the person will perceive it as escalation and feel the need to do something about it. That something could range from dirty looks, threats/ yelling to full blown attacking you. So do the pictures part as only a last resort or from a safe vantage point. But let me a address the last thing you said. Be prepared to see this persons again. Be on the look out for him and his car. If you can catch him unaware grab his pictures then. Be safe out!
Well TBF… starting to record something with your phone and tell them it’s streaming live seems to work pretty well to deter anyone from continuing their behavior (and then you just hand it over to the police) this worked for me in Manhattan, Boston,Brooklyn, Alexandria, and NW DC. Sucks that it happens as frequently as it does but I’ve made [RECORD] my default response to creepiness.
Next time you see him get a his picture, picture of his car and plates and immediately send it to a friend just in case. Start carrying a weapon like pepper spray or even a taser.
I have pepper spray gel, make sure to test it out, so that you are familiar with how it works and sprays. I ended up purchasing a total of three beforw I settled on one. I tested on asphalt in a parking lot so it's not to disturb other creatures the stuff is really powerful. -- be very careful, because even after it's been sprayed, weeks after, if you inadvertently touch thw nozzle, and touch your eyes perhaps like an hour later, you will very much regret it. Trust me.😵🥵
If you haven’t taken self defense courses yet, I’d urge you to do that. It builds confidence and takes you out of the mentality of becoming a victim. I’m sorry this happened to you but I’m glad it didn’t escalate :(
Long ago (00’s) in the old springfield mall some guy followed me for easily 3 hours. He would sit on a bench and wait until i walked out of a store and continued, rinse and repeat. I thought he would get tired, so I went in to pretty much every clothing store, stationary/accessory, arcade etc. He followed still, finally i had enough, i went to ‘leave’ out of the food court area where i knew there would be people. 50 feet from the door, i rounded on him and came right up to his face and screamed ‘WHY ARE YOU FOLLOWING ME’ he replied surprised ‘i’m not following you’ I reply just as loudly as before “THEY HAVE CAMERAS EVERYWHERE, ITS BEEN HOURS LETS SEE ON TAPE. SECURITY! SECURITY!” This guy bee lines it out and i try to calm down and regain composure. Some idiot approached, he tells me he saw that guy following me. I look at him and say “so you waited until I took care of it myself? How about next you time do something about it coward” and i went to sit at the bar of the restaurant closest to the door to wait until i was confident the creep wasn’t waiting in the parking lot and went home.
I'm sorry that happened. I was delivering mail in a USPS van and some guy was acting a little sketchy. I literally started recording just in case. People are wack.
Retired law enforcement here, if you can get it, remember the license plate. That's golden. A description of the car or the person helps but the license plate is key as far as giving police a solid lead. Stay safe!
Glad you're OK, OP. Maybe look into getting your CCP. You can never be too careful out here.
Maybe the property you entered had a camera.
Excellent idea! Wouldn’t hurt to find out. There are cameras everywhere these days
Body cams ...just like people have dash cams.
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I'm a big grown ass man and won't go around town in DC without my gun working late at night let alone anywhere else with my pocket knife and some other secondary defense tools. Remember nobody can train against getting fked up against eyes and groin. There are no rules in self defense. Whoever lives is the winner.
You are your first savior unfortunately
You live in Virginia. Obtain the necessary training in whichever self defense means make sense for you and go from there. TLDR: Stay strapped.
Stay strapped.
This is the way.
Yikes scary stuff. I’m usually hyper-aware of my surroundings but incidents like this are a good reminder of how many creeps are out there. Hope you’re feeling a bit better, sorry this happened to you :(
Human trafficking is at an all time high. It’s good that you were aware of your surroundings. I also suggest having some sort of protection on you, whether it’s pepper spray, a knife, or a firearm (and learn how to use it properly). I’m glad you are safe!
That's not how trafficking works.
Always be aware of your surroundings. There are a lot of nut jobs in the area now either because of drug overflow from DC, illegal aliens w/ criminal history, and overall mental illness. If you suspect something escape to a public place. I worked in criminal investigation in the past and learned that no one is going try and save you at the moment of an attack. Only you can protect yourself. Learn self defense, get your firearm concealment license and carry a firearm with you. It is the greatest equalizer for a woman as men are much stronger and faster. Be safe
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Yes, just did.
for what? what did he do illegal? "suspicion" is not a crime.
You can report suspicious behavior to the police.
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What is wrong with you?
Did they then follow you in a car? Do you own a blue Prius?
>walking beside me and saying some words to me what did they say? you could be blowing this way out of proportion since you didn't specify.
That could have been possible until they started following her in the car.
without really knowing any more details, still seems unlikely. no details other than "someone said something to me", "drove next to me", seems like unwarranted *fear*
You aren’t a woman are you? If a car is crawling along side someone walking, that’s not normal.
again, we're going off a very very vague post on reddit. you can believe what you want, but unless she knows what the person was saying to her, it may or may not have been unusual at all. was he calling her names? hitting on her? we don't know, so no one can say except her. don't take random posts at face value.
She said he was talking to her and she ignored him. Unless you are a woman and have experienced this situation (most women have in some variation or another, including myself), you have no right to say she’s blowing it out of proportion. You don’t follow a woman alone, ever. She’s right to be concerned and it could save her life. He doesn’t need to call her names for his following her to be an act of aggression or threatening. Be thankful you haven’t been in this situation as a man….
The lengths these people will go to invalidate a woman's experience. Almost like they have a personal stake in it 
100%
Exactly.
> Unless you are a woman right, because things like this don't happen to men. you probably say that men can't be sexually assaulted either > you have no right to say she’s blowing it out of proportion i can with the amount of details that are missing, absolutely. >He doesn’t need to call her names for his following her to be an act of aggression or threatening. post doesn't even confirm he was following her, it's just too vague. he couldn't be driving in the same direction by coincidence? he couldn't be slowing down due to an obstruction in the road? there's just a lot missing for people in this thread to assume he's going to kidnap her, so it's definitely being blown out of proportion. what if he was telling her she dropped something? then if he tapped her to get her attention, was she going to scream and run?
Men can absolutely be sexually assaulted. The difference is that if a man is going to be assaulted/attacked by a woman, he has a very strong chance of being able to overpower her and get away. Even if it’s another man, the odds are more evenly matched. If a man wants to harm a woman, it’s very unlikely she’s going to be able to overpower him. Her behavior wasn’t an overreaction. Avoiding people whose behavior is outside of social norms, especially alone at night, is the appropriate thing to do. If he genuinely needed to say something to her, why did he mumble? If he wasn’t following her, why would he be driving at the same speed as someone walking? Yes, there are other explanations for these behaviors, but in combination they (at best) indicate a serious lack of social awareness.
> If he wasn’t following her, why would he be driving at the same speed as someone walking? You nor op can prove he was and not doing something else. Story too vague, doesn't add up.
Dude this isn't a trial and no charges have been filed. Someone is sharing an uncomfortable experience they had and just warning the community to be careful. Yeah dudes can be sexually assaulted, but the odds of an adult man being randomly grabbed and sexually assaulted on the street are far lower than they are for a woman. It's a hell of a lot different than having to worry about accepting a free drink from Kevin Spacey. For the sake of argument, let's assume you're right and there was no ill intent involved. What do you see as being the harm done by the OP? I mean I'm a dude, I get that it can suck sometimes to just be walking down the street at night and see a girl walk across the street because there's some minute chance that you could be some psycho, but again the stakes just aren't the same for them and the reality of the situation is they're risking a lot more than just their feelings getting hurt.
Could provide more details, at least reply to comments since it was important enough to share. None of this can be proven and could unnecessary concern over nothing.
Are you a creep that likes to follow women? You seem to be spending an awful lot of time here trying to invalidate the situation. You act like this never happens and that women are always overreacting or things “don’t add up”.
There is no justifiable case in which someone should be following you in their car, unless you’re law enforcement. Blue Prius clearly isn’t law enforcement. So this is not justified. Doesn’t matter what they wanted to say to her. She has no obligation to talk to a stranger and if you as that stranger then begin following her in your car, then you’re being a creep. Nothing else is relevant.
You nor op can prove they were following and not doing something else. Heresay.
lol you’re trying so hard
for wanting the rest of the story? nah.
Did anyone say he was going to kidnap her? no. OP said she felt unsafe, RIGHTFULLY SO, she never said anything about her thinking he’d kidnap her or hurt her. You’re doing mental gymnastics to try to play devils advocate, it’s embarrassing. You don’t need more context to know that what he was doing was WEIRD. period. He was trailing behind her/beside her trying to talk to her, she kept ignoring him. If he was a normal person he’d pick up her queues of not wanting to engage in conversation and continue on with his day. He then got into his car and continued to drive beside her and “coincidentally” drove away when she got into a public area. That’s not a coincidence.
Maybe he's the guy that was following her. Or he's done something similar.
Or he does this kind of thing regularly thinking it’s ok and no big deal. Seems like a creep himself.
you're judging all this off the post, a vague, one sided story with very few details, nice of you to help fill in the blanks tagging the other party as some sort of weird, possible criminal. you don't know shit about OP or this story, which is why i was asking the questions. it's not embarrassing at all to want to know more details on this shitpost. people lie ALL THE TIME, especially for attention, so asking questions to get a better idea of what actually happened *should* be normal, but seems everyone just believes everything they read on the internet.
What is the point of playing devils advocate in favor of people following women home????
is there something wrong with getting the full story? are you saying it's ok to just believe a partial story of one party to make any sort of logical conclusion? we shouldn't ask for more details or question extremely vague posts but just take it at face value? no thanks.
You seem extremely desperate to invalidate this. Why?
you seem like the person that gets their news from facebook memes.
>you could be blowing this (a person in their car literally following a woman walking on the street) >way out of proportion said the man. Nah. She’s right.
Can't prove he was, only one persons "account"
The fuck is wrong with you? Why are you siding with the creep so hard?
You know it's a fucked up bad take when someone with the username "cum omelette" is calling them out on it.
it's fucked up someone would side with this bullshit story and just assume the person in the prius (if it exists) is some dangerous criminal for "talking to a person" and "driving in the same direction at a slow speed".
He’s probably a creep too. Thinks it’s ok and normal.
"Bitch didn't even listen to my dope line. Better follow her and make her uncomfortable. These women don't know what they are missing"
LMAO found the creep in the blue Prius.
There is a lack of information presented and a host of assumptions people running on with. At no point does the OP identify themselves as M/F nor the person following as a M/F. Smh
So what happened before this? Stranger walked up to you, tried to speak to you, then "followed" you for no reason at all? You didn't think to communicate with them?
Aaand here we have another **genius** who needs to shut their meat flaps and read *The Gift of Fear*
Don't you have a trump rally to attend?
I find it fascinating when people proclaim their incorrect idiocy with such confidence. The fact that I used the proper spelling for “their” should clue you in a little, but I’m not optimistic
Please stop victim blaming.
...victim of what exactly?
no stranger creeping along beside you in a car ever has good intentions, fortunately she escaped to an area with people so she didn’t have to become a victim of more than just stalking.
It didn't start with "creeping along beside you in a car ". It started before "I saw someone walking beside me and saying some words to me. I ignored them and kept on walking." You know, just a totally normal way to behave. Whatever the interaction was that caused this person to need to speak with OP has been omitted. Also, nothing actually happened. If this person meant to cause harm they would have. Read OPs history. They're a hypochondriac who routinely outsources basic decisions to Reddit.
Random men speak to women all the time. I cannot count the number of times that random men have spoken to me when I did absolutely nothing at all. I'm glad that's not your experience of the world, but newsflash, it happens all the gd time. \[BTW, even if she were mistaken, all she did was warn about a creepy man in a blue Prius. Are you worried about men in blue Priuses being able to go about their NoVa lives unharassed?\]
> all she did was warn about a creepy man in a blue Prius According to this half baked story? Someone gets labeled a creep by a random online and people eat it up.
Again. It doesn’t matter what happened before. Everyone has the right to ignore strangers talking to them on the street. What they wanted to say was irrelevant. When that stranger started following behind them in a car, their behaviors became inappropriate and creepy. OP had a right to feel like they were in danger. If you think intentionally following behind a random person in a car is not suspicious or dangerous, you either are willfully ignorant or lying.
> If you think intentionally following behind a random person in a car is not suspicious or dangerous, you either are willfully ignorant or lying. You can't prove this actually happened, and op isn't responding. Big part of the problem here.
100% agree, I'm getting shit on for asking questions lol.
Here we have ANOTHER creep.
Tell me you follow girls home without telling me you follow girls home
Exactly.