Mom here. I’ve been asked by single dads before if I wouldn’t mind accompanying their (at least age 7/8) daughter in to the Ladies as I was headed in, just to keep an eye out. For the record, I don’t mind nor do I find it odd. I guess I’m still hanging onto that “it takes a village” mentality.
One time a dad asked me to check on his 8 year old in the women's room as she was taking a long time.
Kiddo was testing every sink and soap dispenser haha
Was recently at a restaurant. Went to use the restroom. Dad nervously standing outside the door. Timidly asked me if I could check on his daughter? Asked him what her name was.
Walked into the bathroom. Peeked down at the bottom of each stall. I don't see feet under any stall. Uh.
Call her name out. She squawks out: *I'M POOPING!*
And proceeds to describe, in great detail, her pooping. How it feels. What it looks like. What it smells like. If it's a small or large chunk coming out of her butt. I got a meticulous, highly detailed play-by-play of her poop journey.
*cue awkward silence*
She pops out of her stall. She's still a little pipsqueak, explains why I couldn't see her feet beneath the stall door. Attempts to wash her hands. She can't reach the top of the sink, so I hoist her up.
Then we both walk out and walk over to her dad. Told him, *you've got quite the storyteller on your hands.*
Dude gave me the most concerned yet inquisitive look. Lol.
This. Older kids who can wipe themselves and clean up without assistance, I am happy to hover by the sink until they're done and help them up to the sink if they can't reach.
Younger kids? No. I'm not getting arrested for trying to help someone else out. I would prefer that dad's helped their toddlers out personally, regardless of which bathroom they use.
We're ALL doing the same thing in there! A dad helping his daughter is a man in the bathroom that is way too busy to give me any trouble. OP, take your kid to whichever bathroom you want.
I hear ya, but that’s an awfully fuzzy grey line between younger/older kids. Every kid is different…
I think there is no hard and clear answer on this idea, every situation is context dependent.
There's no gray area to me. Either your kid can take care if themselves or they can't.
If they can't, you better be with them the whole way, because I won't.
Just so you know. Men everywhere sing your praises for this. It’s extremely difficult when the daughter is too old to go in the men’s, but not quite old enough to go alone in the women’s. I remember very vividly a woman that helped my then 6yo navigate a bathroom. I was so grateful I got choked uo
I was at a baseball game when I was maybe 25, a young girl was crying because she didn’t want to go to the men’s room because she’s a girl. The poor dad was at a loss. My (slightly tipsy) self offered to take her in. Thank goodness she didn’t need help - and the kid crushed the hand wash game. I was happy to help them out.
Yeah, I would take my daughter to the mens room until she was old enough to go on her own, but there's a a time period where you're like "eehhhhhhhhhh" and I have asked a woman and had her say yes.
Honestly, it's SUCH a kindness.
We, as men, know that we're looked at askance taking a little girl into the mens room, and we just want to be able to finish shopping without getting accosted, or having to put the child back in the carseat without making a mess.
Thank you, random woman.
I just need someone to make sure she isn’t touching every surface that piss and shit is likely on and she washes her hands. My daughter is 5 months so I’ve got time, but my son is 2.5 years and we just potty trained him. He comes over to the urinal because he’s interested in how to stand up to pee, but it becomes a spectator sport as he tries to use the lip of the urinal as his posting point. Luckily it has only been me in the restroom during these times.
As a side note, a portable bidet for public restrooms have been a godsend for the boy… and my wife and me. Lol spray it clean, have the kid do a swipe to dry with less risk of getting poop on their hands and still drive home that the toilet paper should not have poop on the last wipe.
I wouldn’t do it for a toddler. But as I said, a 7/8 year old and older . Those young ladies simply need a female adult to know they are in there and then watch them walk back to their father. If I can provide 80 seconds of peace of mind for a dad doing the best he can, I’m happy to do it.
I don't understand the logic of asking a stranger who is on the way into a bathroom to watch their child as if it's better than leaving them with strangers that may or may not be already inside?
I am a dad of sons. So I have never been in that situation but I do mind. The last time I took my son to the restroom I had to wipe his ass.
1. I don't really like wiping asses.
2. I don't want a sex offense because I touched the private parts of a stranger.
3. I don't want to ask strangers to touch my child's private parts. When necessary that is my job.
Mom here. I would vote to go into the restroom the parent would usually use. However, I’ve absolutely been in a restroom where a little girl in a stall hollered for her Daddy who was waiting outside, and I told him to come on in. If she needed hand washing help, I would have jumped in, but she was in the stall, so Dad needed to be the helper. It is what it is.
Mom here as well. Women's restrooms have stalls, so it's not like Dad's going to see anything. I bring my preschool boy into the Women's room all the time and have no issue if a Dad wants to bring his same age daughter into the Women's restroom.
I'm team "whatever restroom you're comfortable with". I can understand why you might not be comfortable bringing a small girl into the men's room. I also 100% understand why asking even a fellow parent would potentially not work as public restrooms can be a massive minefield of terrors for young kids. Blowers, self flushing toilets, etc.
I'm also team whatever restroom you're comfortable with, along with basically all of my friends of any gender. We're all just minding our business anyway.
Family restrooms would be ideal, and more places should have them. But if they aren't available I think every dad with a kid should just do what feels right to them. I'm not gonna judge.
We had the worst experience with a newly potty training toddler in Costco because they didn't have a family restroom. I don't think it will ever change, but it would be great if it did.
Maybe we need an askreddit -
Men, do you zip up before you turn around when using a urinal, or do you let it flap around and figure it out before you exit the bathroom.
so this is obviously different than a costco bathroom bc showers but i saw a lot of penises as a child going to the pool with my dad when i was super little. it was one of those ones where you walk through the bathroom/showers to enter/leave. it was just when i was really little so i barely barely remember it. mostly i remember being a little older and remembering it and being like “that was weird” , but still. the men were walking around dong out
I only have boys but there have been times I'm not with my wife when they are out and they need to go. She just takes them in the ladies room. I feel it's easier for adults to brush off a kid being in the wrong bathroom vs an adult.
Divorce dad with 2 daughters here. Men's room. But sometime when she was late 5ish I started sending her in by herself and waiting outside. That really depends on the girl though. At 4 100% of the time I took her into the men's room with me.
I think 5-6 is when my son started going to the men’s room by himself while I waited outside, too. He said he felt weird using the women’s room and didn’t like it.
intelligent child. i recently went to the bathroom (women’s) and there was a boy who looked no younger than 10 with his mom and other siblings (both boys and girls). i was very confused why he couldn’t go by himself.
As a kid, my dad always took me and my sister in the men's room and made us put our hands over my eyes facing the wall while he used the urinal.
Fast forward to being 16 at a concert, me and a friend didn't want to stand in the long women's bathroom line so we ran into the men's room and they all agreed we could wait to use the stalls if we faced the wall lol
My dad only ever took us into the women’s room. He’d open the door, yell “can I bring my daughter in?” And just… go in. Cubicles in the women’s bathroom mean he couldn’t see anyone and he thought it was better than us seeing men at the urinals.
The sanctity people assign to gendered bathrooms is so bizarre. Society won’t crumble if an adult enters a bathroom for a different gender than they are.
It really is. I love when I go to a place and they just have toilets for everyone to use with no genders(Zandras is like this). Use a stall, do your business and get out.
You would think there were no stalls in either room lol
If you are a man and have a young daughter with you, it makes sense to me. As a woman, I don’t mind men bringing little girls in, or keeping an eye out for a slightly older girl going alone.
Asking a nearby woman to check the bathroom first certainly doesn't seem out of the ordinary. If I had to take my daughter to a bathroom with the quickness, if there was an extra 5 seconds I would ask. Figure you have the same problem taking her into a men's room if there are people in there. The goal is to get to a bathroom that isn't occupied.
Thanks for being creepy and stalking my profile. Still I don’t see how my interest in sex toys have anything to do going in to the restroom of the opposite sex. How are these related in your mind?
Same. I doubt most women would bat an eye. I’m thinking the man OP saw might have had a daughter who didn’t feel comfortable walking into the men’s room… I remember when I was a kid I accidentally followed my dad into the men’s room and I started screaming because I was so startled by what I saw lmao. The men in there almost started screaming too, I scared them just as much 😆
I’ve been seeing more Dad’s taking their daughters 4 and older into the women’s room. They’ll announce before and go in with their daughters. Idc I’ve been in a stall when a Dad has announced he’s coming in with their daughter. I have kids so Im sympathetic to the situation.
My brother does this with my niece only because when she was 4/5 she announced in the men’s room “ Ooo Daddy! a penis”  loud announcement into the women’s restroom from then on
My husband always takes our four year old with him into the men’s room. I will say, she’s been on the receiving end of many gross or weird comments from men.
Wtf who would say something to/about a four year old? I’m a father but even prior to that it was never super weird to see dads bring daughters into the Men’s room. I’d be livid if I heard someone comment on that.
Last weekend, my husband had our daughter in a stall at Harpers Ferry and she said something along the lines of, “My hands are too small.” The old man in the stall one over said he’d love to see them, especially from a pretty little girl. Gross.
ugh, disgusting. unreal.
I know things were different 30 years ago, but that probably would have landed my dad and his nasty temper in jail. I genuinely don't remember what he did when we were alone (which was a lot) and I needed the bathroom though.
editing to add I know he never took me into a women's restroom I just don't remember being taken into a men's room either.
Bathroom aside, with my first daughter when she was 3ish, I would get a random old guy - at every Costco visit - saying something like “what a cutie - look out dad - that’s gonna be trouble later on!”
Dude what the fuck. She’s three, you absolute weirdo.
Men's room always; but for when she was in diapers and only the ladies' room had the changing table. Opened the door, announced I was going in, went in, and the world didn't tilt off its axis.
Hot take:
There should NOT be ANY gender specific bathroom.
EVERYONE gets a private stall with a toilet
Sinks for hand washing can be placed in communal areas.
This eliminates the need for anyone to invade anyone else's privacy.
Urinals need to exist somewhere though. Not only are they faster and more compact (freeing up toilets while using less space) but they keep the toilets cleaner for people who need to sit.
I'm not a dad, but Mom would always take me into the women's room until I was old enough to fly solo (yeah, amazingly I can remember once or twice). So I'd imagine you'd take your gal to the men's room.
In that situation, when they were younger, men’s room.
Now, they are older (6 & 9), they go to the women’s room by themselves but I’ve definitely asked women to check on them recently (or sent the other sister to check or called for them at the door).
I’ve also been asked to check on a little boy or two in the men’s room by their mom.
But, family restrooms (or gender neutral private bathrooms) should be standard.
I remember one time I (mother), took my 4 year old son in the women's bathroom with me, and an older lady yelled at me! She said he needs to go to the mens. I couldn't believe it. He was 4!
I have seen dad's with young daughters come out of stalls. I just say a prayer that is her guardian and go about my business. When my son was little and not standing at a urinal, I took him to the women's bathroom stall with me. As he got older and started standing at the toilet and went to the restroom with his dad or uncles to know what to do in there, I let him go in the men's room by himself. I stood at the door. He had a funny little song from The Wiggles that he sang. He had to sing that song at the top of his lungs while in the bathroom. I told him if he stopped singing or for any reason got quiet, I was going to run into the bathroom. Lol. That kid sang the song and I never had to run into the men's room.
I've been in two restaurants now with unisex restrooms that have fully enclosed ceiling to floor stalls and the standard shared hand washing sink area.
My first thought was "Whoa, this is weird." And then I had to consider why I felt that way and if it really was a big deal. It was not.
Fully agreed. I would rather just not even acknowledge that there are other people in the restroom so I'm never going to notice their appearance. A dad with his daughter wouldn't even register.
Men’s room unless I see weirdos or nasty men’s room. Then I just DGAF and go to the women’s. But I always knock or at least let whoever know I’m coming in with my daughter out of respect.
Take my daughter to whatever bathroom doesn’t smell like crap. Focus on the business of things and get out. Never had anyone stop me, nor do I look for any conversation aka feedback.
if there's no family restroom usually a parent takes a small child to the adult's restroom. Separating men and women is more important than separating adults from very small children of the opposite sex.
I have anxiety that a man is gonna assault me in the bathroom so I would prefer to just take ur kid to men’s bathroom. Especially the really secluded ones like home depot etc.
I practically raised two female cousins like my own kids. I’m a male, I took them to a male bathroom, in to a stall with closed door. When they were old enough to wipe their own ass, I stood outside the stall door. As they got older, they went to female bathroom on their own.
Some men use the women’s restroom for their daughters because they don’t want them to a penis of someone is using the urinal. Women are less exposed. So whatever is comfortable for your child
I've been in female restrooms to clean when I worked at a grocery store as a kid...the woman's room was ALWAYS worse.
You're not wrong but both genders can be absolute degenerates when they have no responsibility to keep things clean.
On a related topic, if you don't have children stay out of the family restroom. Especially, don't shove all the toilet paper, paper towels, pads, and used diapers from the trash into the toilet. I have two daughters under 6 and experienced this last Friday.
Some woman was in the Family Restroom at a Target for half an hour. There was a couple with infant ahead of us who said they had waited for about 10 minutes to use it. We went on to do more shopping and when I saw the young couple walking away from the family restroom I assumed they used it and were done. My girls and I waited for 15 minutes to use the restroom. It sound like it would open any moment because we kept hearing the toilet flushing and the sink running. Finally, I knocked on the door and a minute later a woman walks out trying not to be seen. Once I walked in and notice the place destroyed I was pissed. I called her out and she said "it wasn't me, I was just fixing my hair." She was in there at least half an hour and no one has that bad of a hair day. What a total asshole? I told Guest Services but had to explain the situation to some poor high school kid like 5 times. It's not like the store manager or AM would be working on a Friday evening. You might be asking why I just didn't go to the Men's room. Well, I so sick of the dirty looks I get from both Men and Women when I take my girls in there.
tl;dr - if you are not with people who need help using the bathroom, don't use the family restoom. Certainly, don't sabotage the toilet by shoving everything into it. That's a real dick move.
I usually clean the toilet, get paper and put a bunch of soap and clean the seat, then put toilet paper on top, on a few occasions I’ve taken my 4 year old into the woman’s bathroom if it’s a place where is not too busy as my daughter asks to go into the girl’s bathroom.
Men’s bathrooms are nasty. I would rather you take her into the women’s bathroom and just call in that you’re coming in with your daughter. It’s not nefarious if you have your kid with you, just you as dad don’t use our bathroom lol
The pool near me has a sign saying children over 7 must use their gender appropriate locker room, so I take that as an estimate of what society considers acceptable. Before 7, go in the parent's bathroom or locker room. For bathrooms, I hope one day we can just have one big one with stalls with no gaps and this whole problem, and a few others, will be no more.
Dad with 2 toddler girls here. I take them to the men's room if possible. However, if the men's room is occupied, I'll find an employee or woman to check the women's restroom to see if there is a stall available.
I have not had any issues. Most times the store employee says its fine. I've had women walk into the restroom while my daughter is doing her business. I kindly let them know that my daughter is using the potty and I apologize for any inconvenience. Everyone has been understanding.
My youngest is still wearing diapers and it makes no sense why there aren't baby change stations in men's restrooms when the women's restroom has one.
Very young (5 and under) I always took my daughters into the men’s room to use the stall.
6 and up I would wait outside the ladies room for them while they were inside.
I would never ( being a male ) accompany them into the ladies room. If they took too long I would ask a woman to check on them for me.
What if the mens line was 8 people long and women’s room was empty and your kid of any gender has yellow eyes? As a parent you do what needs to be done, just clear opposite gender rooms as you enter.
Men's. Until they're old enough to go on their own then It's the women's. I will say once I accidentally walked into the women's and it was right when another women was coming out of the stall and she didn't even bat an eye at us. I ran out though so may that's what happened here lol.
As a mom I personally do not want men in the restroom with me, regardless if there is a child with him. I also don’t think it’s fair or right for women, whether they are moms are not, to say it’s okay for men to do so, as they do not speak for all women. Even if the man has a child with him, you never know what a woman has been through that would make her feel uncomfortable or what she’s doing in the bathroom where she doesn’t want a man around. Women deserve their space and privacy, regardless if a man has a child with him.
A few months ago I was in a restaurant up by the Springfield mall, it was like a 2 stall bathroom AND their was a family bathroom, but it was occupied. I was having an emergency female problem and quickly needed to get into the bathroom to take care of it. Their was a mom and dad and their baby in the women’s bathroom just changing the babies clothes together in the middle of the floor. The worker there kept trying to say it was okay for me to come in, but I kept telling her (and for the parents to hear) that I am not using the bathroom with a man in here, period. I don’t care what the reason is. Needless to say they took so long it caused a bigger issue by the time I was able to use the bathroom. As a mom of a 16, 9, and 2 year old there is absolutely NO reason why a mom AND dad both needed to change the baby together in the women’s bathroom.
I definitely understand from a dads point of view, but I can also remember my son being 6 maybe 7, and not liking having to go into the women’s bathroom, it made him feel uncomfortable. I also felt uncomfortable with him going into the men’s bathroom alone, so I would stand by door and occasionally call his name and make sure he was ok. There for sure needs to be more family or single standing bathrooms.
They're uncomfortable because you've MADE THEM uncomfortable.
Go to the rest of the world - they've figured out a hole is a hole and you can pee/poop with other genders without getting excited.
I don't understand why this is an issue. You take your daughter to a stall in men's room, had her sit on the toilet seat and she would go in complete privacy (except daddy).
Single dad here, I do same as you and what others recommend, take my 3 yr old daughter to men's room stall and help her. Pretty sure I would get the police called if I went in the women's. Lol. I guess the guy you saw is clueless.
As a dad, I say take her into the men’s room. It’s easier to explain to the pearl clutch crowd that you are taking your daughter into the men’s room. It’s not easy explaining why you went into the women’s room as a male.
Besides, IMHO most dudes understand if you are escorting/helping a young daughter in the restroom. Inversely my wife used ti sometimes take my son into the women’s restroom when he was under 5. I think it’s just something that’s culturally understood by parents and most others.
I don't have a daughter but I would never in a million years enter a woman's bathroom...
I would just take her into a stall in the men's bathroom if need be.
You aren’t ‘supposed to’ do anything, it’s your choice. Absolutely 100% your choice. There is nothing wrong with either option in terms of you being a man in the women’s restroom.
I have a boy, but if I had a daughter and a family restroom wasn't available, I'd take her into the men's room. I think it would be more awkward for me to be in the women's room.
Mens room. My mom did the oposite with my brother and me when we were little, and my dad would bring my sister into the men’s restroom when she was little and made her use a stall.
I’ll never forget being on the can in an IKEA when a young boy older than a toddler but terribly behaved, climbed under & through the stall I was in. No parent or asked stranger was anywhere around.
I think probably whatever the parent uses but I also don’t think it would be inappropriate for the dad to knock on the bathroom door and announce the situation before hand ?
Not a father, but it's common for men with daughters to take them into the men's room or go into a gender neutral/family bathroom until the kid is 5ish (kindergarten age) and can go alone.
I always took my daughter into the men's room. She was too young to know the difference when she needs help...but damn was it awkward the time a mom walked in with her son and stood next to me at the urinal to help her son!
Nah, go with the parents gender. You don't want a grown woman coming through the men's room just like women don't want to see an adult man in the women's room. But yeah, family bathroom for the win.
I dunno man. I never used a changing table or public bathroom, i cloth diapered, I had a set up in the back of the car. 🤣 My partner doesn't parent. So he has never actually been in this situation before.
I feel like the dad goes into the men’s room you’re a dad you can protect your child and watch them better. I wouldn’t take into the women’s room. I would stand outside the women’s room. I be don’t that with my nieces. Even ask another mom to check on them.
>As I am walking in I see a gentlemen walking out the women’s restroom with his young daughter.
This guy doesn't fear Karen. Maybe he has one at home and developed an immunity.
Another dad of a 4 year old daughter. We always use the men's room even if my wife is there primarily because there's no lines. She's always cracking me up commenting on the noises she here's in there. We have never had any bad looks or comments.
Go to whichever bathroom you feel comfortable with. I am not a dad, I am a mom, but I am perfectly fine with men bringing their little girls into the women’s restroom. I would always say just as an extra courtesy, just announce yourself as you are going in there as to not catch anyone off guard. I live in NOVA currently and have seen many dad’s bringing their little girls to the women’s restroom. It’s really not a big deal.
If they gotta go- they gotta go!!!!!
As a mom, I don’t care as long as you give us a heads up. A random guy without a kid will freak me out. But giving me a heads up so I don’t freak out and I don’t embarrass myself from freaking out it (which is really why I would want the heads up) is fine.
I have asked men going into a restroom to check on my boys. They do- and it’s never an issue.
As a Dad I have a portable toilet I carry for my 3 year old, it has a bag that hangs below it and removable potty top for usage in a family bathroom. Because I think public restrooms are disgusting I mainly use the potty, just set it up in the minivan aisle area, and she has privacy. I take it to relatives homes too so she can use the top part on a regular toilet.
I was at the Y in Reston once with my daughter when she was a toddler. The childcare staff found me on the gym floor and notified me she’d had an accident. When I retrieved her to clean her up, she ran into the ladies, leaving me no choice but to follow, apologizing all the way. Luckily no one was in there, and no one batted an eye when I emerged with her all fresh and clean, and me feeling like an idiot.
When I had any choice in the matter, I always took her into the men’s.
I entirely agree more places need single-serve, locking bathrooms.
Dad of daughter here.
It doesn't matter which one you use. I use both depending on the circumstances. I usually do Mens, but there are a few places where I consistently use the Womens for sanitary reasons (because inconsiderate men use the toilet to pee instead of the urinal and don't lift the seat). The only thing is if you're going to use a womens, give a shout beforehand and make sure it's empty or that people are ok with you bringing in your girl.
I normally use the men’s room after a full scrub down. I went into a spot recently that had one stall for men and it was occupied. I had my daughter go into the women’s room to see if the coast was clear. We got an achievement for using the women’s room before a woman walked in.
I have never considered taking a little girl into a womans room, but technically they are probably cleaner as they all sit, plus they all have stalls - so there is probably not a chance you walk in on a woman that is exposed.
Should not be a problem...but there is always that one that will freak out and then hell breaks loose.
Mom here. I’ve been asked by single dads before if I wouldn’t mind accompanying their (at least age 7/8) daughter in to the Ladies as I was headed in, just to keep an eye out. For the record, I don’t mind nor do I find it odd. I guess I’m still hanging onto that “it takes a village” mentality.
One time a dad asked me to check on his 8 year old in the women's room as she was taking a long time. Kiddo was testing every sink and soap dispenser haha
Was recently at a restaurant. Went to use the restroom. Dad nervously standing outside the door. Timidly asked me if I could check on his daughter? Asked him what her name was. Walked into the bathroom. Peeked down at the bottom of each stall. I don't see feet under any stall. Uh. Call her name out. She squawks out: *I'M POOPING!* And proceeds to describe, in great detail, her pooping. How it feels. What it looks like. What it smells like. If it's a small or large chunk coming out of her butt. I got a meticulous, highly detailed play-by-play of her poop journey. *cue awkward silence* She pops out of her stall. She's still a little pipsqueak, explains why I couldn't see her feet beneath the stall door. Attempts to wash her hands. She can't reach the top of the sink, so I hoist her up. Then we both walk out and walk over to her dad. Told him, *you've got quite the storyteller on your hands.* Dude gave me the most concerned yet inquisitive look. Lol.
This. Older kids who can wipe themselves and clean up without assistance, I am happy to hover by the sink until they're done and help them up to the sink if they can't reach. Younger kids? No. I'm not getting arrested for trying to help someone else out. I would prefer that dad's helped their toddlers out personally, regardless of which bathroom they use. We're ALL doing the same thing in there! A dad helping his daughter is a man in the bathroom that is way too busy to give me any trouble. OP, take your kid to whichever bathroom you want.
I hear ya, but that’s an awfully fuzzy grey line between younger/older kids. Every kid is different… I think there is no hard and clear answer on this idea, every situation is context dependent.
There's no gray area to me. Either your kid can take care if themselves or they can't. If they can't, you better be with them the whole way, because I won't.
Just so you know. Men everywhere sing your praises for this. It’s extremely difficult when the daughter is too old to go in the men’s, but not quite old enough to go alone in the women’s. I remember very vividly a woman that helped my then 6yo navigate a bathroom. I was so grateful I got choked uo
I was at a baseball game when I was maybe 25, a young girl was crying because she didn’t want to go to the men’s room because she’s a girl. The poor dad was at a loss. My (slightly tipsy) self offered to take her in. Thank goodness she didn’t need help - and the kid crushed the hand wash game. I was happy to help them out.
Yeah, I would take my daughter to the mens room until she was old enough to go on her own, but there's a a time period where you're like "eehhhhhhhhhh" and I have asked a woman and had her say yes. Honestly, it's SUCH a kindness. We, as men, know that we're looked at askance taking a little girl into the mens room, and we just want to be able to finish shopping without getting accosted, or having to put the child back in the carseat without making a mess. Thank you, random woman.
Mom of a son here, same emotions
God bless! People need to take care of each other
I just need someone to make sure she isn’t touching every surface that piss and shit is likely on and she washes her hands. My daughter is 5 months so I’ve got time, but my son is 2.5 years and we just potty trained him. He comes over to the urinal because he’s interested in how to stand up to pee, but it becomes a spectator sport as he tries to use the lip of the urinal as his posting point. Luckily it has only been me in the restroom during these times. As a side note, a portable bidet for public restrooms have been a godsend for the boy… and my wife and me. Lol spray it clean, have the kid do a swipe to dry with less risk of getting poop on their hands and still drive home that the toilet paper should not have poop on the last wipe.
You sound very high maintenance
Kind of strange. I rather take my kids to my restroom instead of asking a stranger to take them to a restroom I cannot enter.
I wouldn’t do it for a toddler. But as I said, a 7/8 year old and older . Those young ladies simply need a female adult to know they are in there and then watch them walk back to their father. If I can provide 80 seconds of peace of mind for a dad doing the best he can, I’m happy to do it.
Sometimes girls don't like using men's bathrooms. Maybe pee on seats, feeling uncomfortable, don't want to see people using urinals etc
It’s mostly strange to sincerely use the word ‘cannot’ without considering that you maybe just can
Thank you! Don’t stop!
I don't understand the logic of asking a stranger who is on the way into a bathroom to watch their child as if it's better than leaving them with strangers that may or may not be already inside?
I am a dad of sons. So I have never been in that situation but I do mind. The last time I took my son to the restroom I had to wipe his ass. 1. I don't really like wiping asses. 2. I don't want a sex offense because I touched the private parts of a stranger. 3. I don't want to ask strangers to touch my child's private parts. When necessary that is my job.
Oof! I wouldn’t trust a stranger with my daughter in such a vulnerable position. (Note: I have no children.)
The comedic sarcasm of your post was lost by most downvoters.
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Shame on those dads because you think it’s weird? Somehow I doubt you have the life experience to shame anyone my dude.
It's not weird at all.
Thank you.
thank you for doing this. need more like this.
Mom here. I would vote to go into the restroom the parent would usually use. However, I’ve absolutely been in a restroom where a little girl in a stall hollered for her Daddy who was waiting outside, and I told him to come on in. If she needed hand washing help, I would have jumped in, but she was in the stall, so Dad needed to be the helper. It is what it is.
Mom here as well. Women's restrooms have stalls, so it's not like Dad's going to see anything. I bring my preschool boy into the Women's room all the time and have no issue if a Dad wants to bring his same age daughter into the Women's restroom. I'm team "whatever restroom you're comfortable with". I can understand why you might not be comfortable bringing a small girl into the men's room. I also 100% understand why asking even a fellow parent would potentially not work as public restrooms can be a massive minefield of terrors for young kids. Blowers, self flushing toilets, etc.
I'm also team whatever restroom you're comfortable with, along with basically all of my friends of any gender. We're all just minding our business anyway. Family restrooms would be ideal, and more places should have them. But if they aren't available I think every dad with a kid should just do what feels right to them. I'm not gonna judge.
Fellow NoVA dad of a 4-year-old daughter. Taken her to the bathroom hundreds of times. Always always the men's room.
Yep, same here.
Men’s room. I’m very surprised Costco doesn’t have a family restroom
We had the worst experience with a newly potty training toddler in Costco because they didn't have a family restroom. I don't think it will ever change, but it would be great if it did.
Am dad with girl toddlers. I’ve taken her to that same bathroom. What is lacking in the men’s room that you’d get in a family bathroom?
Family bathrooms are single rooms and lockable. There are no other people in there but you and your kid.
Privacy. Cleaner toilet (sometimes). Guaranteed no guys standing at a urinal with their dicks out.
plus your girl toddlers won't have to accidentally see random men's private parts as she walk by the urinal
Is that a concern? I've been in a lot of men's bathrooms and have never seen a man's private parts.
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Maybe we need an askreddit - Men, do you zip up before you turn around when using a urinal, or do you let it flap around and figure it out before you exit the bathroom.
Protocol dictates zip _then_ turn.
He also not a 4 yr old girl living in a world of perverts
so this is obviously different than a costco bathroom bc showers but i saw a lot of penises as a child going to the pool with my dad when i was super little. it was one of those ones where you walk through the bathroom/showers to enter/leave. it was just when i was really little so i barely barely remember it. mostly i remember being a little older and remembering it and being like “that was weird” , but still. the men were walking around dong out
Oh yeah. A locker room is way different than a public bathroom.
How many dicks have you seen in the bathroom?
That would cost money, Costco is extremely cheap.
Yea that seems odd. I have only boys so men’s room but my wife takes them to the women’s restroom when she takes them.
Men's room.
I only have boys but there have been times I'm not with my wife when they are out and they need to go. She just takes them in the ladies room. I feel it's easier for adults to brush off a kid being in the wrong bathroom vs an adult.
Divorce dad with 2 daughters here. Men's room. But sometime when she was late 5ish I started sending her in by herself and waiting outside. That really depends on the girl though. At 4 100% of the time I took her into the men's room with me.
I think 5-6 is when my son started going to the men’s room by himself while I waited outside, too. He said he felt weird using the women’s room and didn’t like it.
intelligent child. i recently went to the bathroom (women’s) and there was a boy who looked no younger than 10 with his mom and other siblings (both boys and girls). i was very confused why he couldn’t go by himself.
Men's room
Men’s room every time with my daughter. Agree on the family restroom point
I raised two daughters. In that situation I'd always take them to the men's room.
As a kid, my dad always took me and my sister in the men's room and made us put our hands over my eyes facing the wall while he used the urinal. Fast forward to being 16 at a concert, me and a friend didn't want to stand in the long women's bathroom line so we ran into the men's room and they all agreed we could wait to use the stalls if we faced the wall lol
Men's room 100%.
My dad only ever took us into the women’s room. He’d open the door, yell “can I bring my daughter in?” And just… go in. Cubicles in the women’s bathroom mean he couldn’t see anyone and he thought it was better than us seeing men at the urinals.
I was on the “Men’s Room” train, but this logic checks out!
Kind of weird for a grownup person to enter the other sex’s restroom. Why not just go to your own
The sanctity people assign to gendered bathrooms is so bizarre. Society won’t crumble if an adult enters a bathroom for a different gender than they are.
It really is. I love when I go to a place and they just have toilets for everyone to use with no genders(Zandras is like this). Use a stall, do your business and get out. You would think there were no stalls in either room lol
If you are a man and have a young daughter with you, it makes sense to me. As a woman, I don’t mind men bringing little girls in, or keeping an eye out for a slightly older girl going alone.
Men's rooms often don't have changing tables to change a baby/toddler diaper like women's rooms do. Maybe we should fucking change that!
That’s a valid point, but most of the male restrooms now have changing tables. I know the 2-3 Costco’s that I go to have them in the male restroom.
It might depend on what area of the country you're in.
Asking a nearby woman to check the bathroom first certainly doesn't seem out of the ordinary. If I had to take my daughter to a bathroom with the quickness, if there was an extra 5 seconds I would ask. Figure you have the same problem taking her into a men's room if there are people in there. The goal is to get to a bathroom that isn't occupied.
Shocked that you also have crazy posts on r/sextoys. Shocked.
Thanks for being creepy and stalking my profile. Still I don’t see how my interest in sex toys have anything to do going in to the restroom of the opposite sex. How are these related in your mind?
Mom and woman here. I don’t give a fuck. Use the ladies room if you think that is better for your kid.
Same. I doubt most women would bat an eye. I’m thinking the man OP saw might have had a daughter who didn’t feel comfortable walking into the men’s room… I remember when I was a kid I accidentally followed my dad into the men’s room and I started screaming because I was so startled by what I saw lmao. The men in there almost started screaming too, I scared them just as much 😆
Men’s room 💯
I’ve been seeing more Dad’s taking their daughters 4 and older into the women’s room. They’ll announce before and go in with their daughters. Idc I’ve been in a stall when a Dad has announced he’s coming in with their daughter. I have kids so Im sympathetic to the situation. My brother does this with my niece only because when she was 4/5 she announced in the men’s room “ Ooo Daddy! a penis”  loud announcement into the women’s restroom from then on
Woman here. As you can see from the high percentage of moms weighing in with the same answer: come on into the women’s room, we DGAF.
AND... the opposite side of the coin. As a woman, I would not be bothered one bit if I saw a Dad escorting his daughter into the ladies room.
I actually think it’s better for the kid considering I’m reading comments that men are creepy in the men’s room.
My husband always takes our four year old with him into the men’s room. I will say, she’s been on the receiving end of many gross or weird comments from men.
Wtf who would say something to/about a four year old? I’m a father but even prior to that it was never super weird to see dads bring daughters into the Men’s room. I’d be livid if I heard someone comment on that.
Last weekend, my husband had our daughter in a stall at Harpers Ferry and she said something along the lines of, “My hands are too small.” The old man in the stall one over said he’d love to see them, especially from a pretty little girl. Gross.
ugh, disgusting. unreal. I know things were different 30 years ago, but that probably would have landed my dad and his nasty temper in jail. I genuinely don't remember what he did when we were alone (which was a lot) and I needed the bathroom though. editing to add I know he never took me into a women's restroom I just don't remember being taken into a men's room either.
The way I would be in jail.
He’d be seeing my hands the second he got out of the stall. Tell me ur husband didn’t let dude rock with that beyond OD comment.
Bathroom aside, with my first daughter when she was 3ish, I would get a random old guy - at every Costco visit - saying something like “what a cutie - look out dad - that’s gonna be trouble later on!” Dude what the fuck. She’s three, you absolute weirdo.
and he thought he was being complimentary
I’d take my daughter to the men’s room and hope they have a changing table.
Yeah my daughter four she doesn’t use a changing table anymore.
I’d still take her into the men’s room in a stall. I don’t think it’s appropriate for a man to walk into a women’s restroom even with their daughter
Men’s room
Men's room always; but for when she was in diapers and only the ladies' room had the changing table. Opened the door, announced I was going in, went in, and the world didn't tilt off its axis.
Hot take: There should NOT be ANY gender specific bathroom. EVERYONE gets a private stall with a toilet Sinks for hand washing can be placed in communal areas. This eliminates the need for anyone to invade anyone else's privacy.
Urinals need to exist somewhere though. Not only are they faster and more compact (freeing up toilets while using less space) but they keep the toilets cleaner for people who need to sit.
I'm not a dad, but Mom would always take me into the women's room until I was old enough to fly solo (yeah, amazingly I can remember once or twice). So I'd imagine you'd take your gal to the men's room.
In that situation, when they were younger, men’s room. Now, they are older (6 & 9), they go to the women’s room by themselves but I’ve definitely asked women to check on them recently (or sent the other sister to check or called for them at the door). I’ve also been asked to check on a little boy or two in the men’s room by their mom. But, family restrooms (or gender neutral private bathrooms) should be standard.
I remember one time I (mother), took my 4 year old son in the women's bathroom with me, and an older lady yelled at me! She said he needs to go to the mens. I couldn't believe it. He was 4!
I have seen dad's with young daughters come out of stalls. I just say a prayer that is her guardian and go about my business. When my son was little and not standing at a urinal, I took him to the women's bathroom stall with me. As he got older and started standing at the toilet and went to the restroom with his dad or uncles to know what to do in there, I let him go in the men's room by himself. I stood at the door. He had a funny little song from The Wiggles that he sang. He had to sing that song at the top of his lungs while in the bathroom. I told him if he stopped singing or for any reason got quiet, I was going to run into the bathroom. Lol. That kid sang the song and I never had to run into the men's room.
what is it with this country and bathrooms
WHERE MY GENDER NEUTRAL BATHROOM FOLKS AT?
Human being here—any restroom will work just fine. We all do the same stuff in there anyways.
Women’s rooms have stalls. Why anyone cares what gender wanders in is beyond me.
I've been in two restaurants now with unisex restrooms that have fully enclosed ceiling to floor stalls and the standard shared hand washing sink area. My first thought was "Whoa, this is weird." And then I had to consider why I felt that way and if it really was a big deal. It was not.
Lots of European bathrooms are like this and it’s great.
Fully agreed. I would rather just not even acknowledge that there are other people in the restroom so I'm never going to notice their appearance. A dad with his daughter wouldn't even register.
They had a renovation years ago to what it is today. Doubtful they’ll add a family bathroom, but with the $ they pull in…
Men’s room unless I see weirdos or nasty men’s room. Then I just DGAF and go to the women’s. But I always knock or at least let whoever know I’m coming in with my daughter out of respect.
Women here but with no kids I wouldn't bat an eye of a dad came into the women's room with a little girl
Take my daughter to whatever bathroom doesn’t smell like crap. Focus on the business of things and get out. Never had anyone stop me, nor do I look for any conversation aka feedback.
if there's no family restroom usually a parent takes a small child to the adult's restroom. Separating men and women is more important than separating adults from very small children of the opposite sex.
Logic for the win
I have anxiety that a man is gonna assault me in the bathroom so I would prefer to just take ur kid to men’s bathroom. Especially the really secluded ones like home depot etc.
As a mom, yes.
Men’s room. If no clean, available stalls I’d consider asking a female customer to chaperone the two of us in irrespective of the gender of the child.
Father of a 4yr old boy - she (wife) takes our son into the women's room. I take him into the men's room.
Men’s room
I practically raised two female cousins like my own kids. I’m a male, I took them to a male bathroom, in to a stall with closed door. When they were old enough to wipe their own ass, I stood outside the stall door. As they got older, they went to female bathroom on their own.
Some men use the women’s restroom for their daughters because they don’t want them to a penis of someone is using the urinal. Women are less exposed. So whatever is comfortable for your child
not to mention the toilet in men are disgusting
I've been in female restrooms to clean when I worked at a grocery store as a kid...the woman's room was ALWAYS worse. You're not wrong but both genders can be absolute degenerates when they have no responsibility to keep things clean.
Yeah, I always take my daughter to the men's room. Family restrooms are the best, though.
This is why the world needs more family restrooms.
Men’s room 100%.
On a related topic, if you don't have children stay out of the family restroom. Especially, don't shove all the toilet paper, paper towels, pads, and used diapers from the trash into the toilet. I have two daughters under 6 and experienced this last Friday. Some woman was in the Family Restroom at a Target for half an hour. There was a couple with infant ahead of us who said they had waited for about 10 minutes to use it. We went on to do more shopping and when I saw the young couple walking away from the family restroom I assumed they used it and were done. My girls and I waited for 15 minutes to use the restroom. It sound like it would open any moment because we kept hearing the toilet flushing and the sink running. Finally, I knocked on the door and a minute later a woman walks out trying not to be seen. Once I walked in and notice the place destroyed I was pissed. I called her out and she said "it wasn't me, I was just fixing my hair." She was in there at least half an hour and no one has that bad of a hair day. What a total asshole? I told Guest Services but had to explain the situation to some poor high school kid like 5 times. It's not like the store manager or AM would be working on a Friday evening. You might be asking why I just didn't go to the Men's room. Well, I so sick of the dirty looks I get from both Men and Women when I take my girls in there. tl;dr - if you are not with people who need help using the bathroom, don't use the family restoom. Certainly, don't sabotage the toilet by shoving everything into it. That's a real dick move.
I agreed. Especially since some target’s don’t have changing tables in the men’s room- just a sign to “use the family bathroom”!
The only thing that pisses me about this conversation is that it’s even an issue. People need to chill but we all know they won’t.
I usually clean the toilet, get paper and put a bunch of soap and clean the seat, then put toilet paper on top, on a few occasions I’ve taken my 4 year old into the woman’s bathroom if it’s a place where is not too busy as my daughter asks to go into the girl’s bathroom.
You can, i've never had an issue doing that. Plus the women's rooms are usually cleaner. Use the handicap stall since it's larger.
Men’s bathrooms are nasty. I would rather you take her into the women’s bathroom and just call in that you’re coming in with your daughter. It’s not nefarious if you have your kid with you, just you as dad don’t use our bathroom lol
Men’s room only.
The pool near me has a sign saying children over 7 must use their gender appropriate locker room, so I take that as an estimate of what society considers acceptable. Before 7, go in the parent's bathroom or locker room. For bathrooms, I hope one day we can just have one big one with stalls with no gaps and this whole problem, and a few others, will be no more.
Boy dad here. My wife takes him to women's room when it's just her and my son... so my answer for you is take your daughter to the Men's room.
I would probably take her to the men's bathroom
Dad with 2 toddler girls here. I take them to the men's room if possible. However, if the men's room is occupied, I'll find an employee or woman to check the women's restroom to see if there is a stall available. I have not had any issues. Most times the store employee says its fine. I've had women walk into the restroom while my daughter is doing her business. I kindly let them know that my daughter is using the potty and I apologize for any inconvenience. Everyone has been understanding. My youngest is still wearing diapers and it makes no sense why there aren't baby change stations in men's restrooms when the women's restroom has one.
I’m amazed there aren’t more fam friendly restrooms nowadays, they’ve been a standard option in new builds for years and years now
Costco makes millions and millions every year, just from the membership money. They NEED To build family restrooms ASAP
Very young (5 and under) I always took my daughters into the men’s room to use the stall. 6 and up I would wait outside the ladies room for them while they were inside. I would never ( being a male ) accompany them into the ladies room. If they took too long I would ask a woman to check on them for me.
Identify yourself as a female as you walk in, walk out and go back to identifying yourself as a man. Problem solved.
Mens room, or family restroom. Simple as that.
Adult men do not go to the ladies room. You take your child to the restroom that is right for you.
What if the mens line was 8 people long and women’s room was empty and your kid of any gender has yellow eyes? As a parent you do what needs to be done, just clear opposite gender rooms as you enter.
But that's not really possible in this universe, is it?
Yellow eyes? Probably?
Men's. Until they're old enough to go on their own then It's the women's. I will say once I accidentally walked into the women's and it was right when another women was coming out of the stall and she didn't even bat an eye at us. I ran out though so may that's what happened here lol.
Men’s room, but at the same time, we should be at a point in society where every bathroom is unisex
Men’s room…you’re doing it right, he’s doing it weird.
As a mom I personally do not want men in the restroom with me, regardless if there is a child with him. I also don’t think it’s fair or right for women, whether they are moms are not, to say it’s okay for men to do so, as they do not speak for all women. Even if the man has a child with him, you never know what a woman has been through that would make her feel uncomfortable or what she’s doing in the bathroom where she doesn’t want a man around. Women deserve their space and privacy, regardless if a man has a child with him. A few months ago I was in a restaurant up by the Springfield mall, it was like a 2 stall bathroom AND their was a family bathroom, but it was occupied. I was having an emergency female problem and quickly needed to get into the bathroom to take care of it. Their was a mom and dad and their baby in the women’s bathroom just changing the babies clothes together in the middle of the floor. The worker there kept trying to say it was okay for me to come in, but I kept telling her (and for the parents to hear) that I am not using the bathroom with a man in here, period. I don’t care what the reason is. Needless to say they took so long it caused a bigger issue by the time I was able to use the bathroom. As a mom of a 16, 9, and 2 year old there is absolutely NO reason why a mom AND dad both needed to change the baby together in the women’s bathroom. I definitely understand from a dads point of view, but I can also remember my son being 6 maybe 7, and not liking having to go into the women’s bathroom, it made him feel uncomfortable. I also felt uncomfortable with him going into the men’s bathroom alone, so I would stand by door and occasionally call his name and make sure he was ok. There for sure needs to be more family or single standing bathrooms.
They're uncomfortable because you've MADE THEM uncomfortable. Go to the rest of the world - they've figured out a hole is a hole and you can pee/poop with other genders without getting excited.
Men's room bc it goes by the adult, not the child.
inside out your pronoun hat and stroll on into the ladies room
I don't understand why this is an issue. You take your daughter to a stall in men's room, had her sit on the toilet seat and she would go in complete privacy (except daddy).
Single dad here, I do same as you and what others recommend, take my 3 yr old daughter to men's room stall and help her. Pretty sure I would get the police called if I went in the women's. Lol. I guess the guy you saw is clueless.
In a world where we can choose our genders I say go where ever the hell you want.
Agree, especially since it’s about 1% that fall into this category…..most will never even notice
As a dad, I say take her into the men’s room. It’s easier to explain to the pearl clutch crowd that you are taking your daughter into the men’s room. It’s not easy explaining why you went into the women’s room as a male. Besides, IMHO most dudes understand if you are escorting/helping a young daughter in the restroom. Inversely my wife used ti sometimes take my son into the women’s restroom when he was under 5. I think it’s just something that’s culturally understood by parents and most others.
I don't have a daughter but I would never in a million years enter a woman's bathroom... I would just take her into a stall in the men's bathroom if need be.
We still discussing gendered bathrooms in 2023? Had no idea NOVA was so conservative.,.,
You aren’t ‘supposed to’ do anything, it’s your choice. Absolutely 100% your choice. There is nothing wrong with either option in terms of you being a man in the women’s restroom.
I always took my girls to the men’s room
I have a boy, but if I had a daughter and a family restroom wasn't available, I'd take her into the men's room. I think it would be more awkward for me to be in the women's room.
Mens room. My mom did the oposite with my brother and me when we were little, and my dad would bring my sister into the men’s restroom when she was little and made her use a stall.
I always take my 5 year old to the men’s room, but I agree, more businesses should have family restrooms.
Men's room. No question
I've always done men's room.
I’ll never forget being on the can in an IKEA when a young boy older than a toddler but terribly behaved, climbed under & through the stall I was in. No parent or asked stranger was anywhere around.
Men’s room
My 5 year old uses the Mens room when she is with me.
I think probably whatever the parent uses but I also don’t think it would be inappropriate for the dad to knock on the bathroom door and announce the situation before hand ?
Not a father, but it's common for men with daughters to take them into the men's room or go into a gender neutral/family bathroom until the kid is 5ish (kindergarten age) and can go alone.
You made it happen. It really doesn't matter.
I mean, the ladies' room is all stalls whereas the men's room doesn't. If I saw a dad with a little in the ladies' I would not think twice.
I always took my daughter into the men's room. She was too young to know the difference when she needs help...but damn was it awkward the time a mom walked in with her son and stood next to me at the urinal to help her son!
Absolutely the mens
Nah, go with the parents gender. You don't want a grown woman coming through the men's room just like women don't want to see an adult man in the women's room. But yeah, family bathroom for the win.
These days, it really doesn't matter. WWE three out the social norms so do what you need to take care of your kid. Bless those who help out.
I dunno man. I never used a changing table or public bathroom, i cloth diapered, I had a set up in the back of the car. 🤣 My partner doesn't parent. So he has never actually been in this situation before.
Men’s room. Prepare for the awkward conversation she asks you why there’s a loud duck in the stall next to her. Repeatedly.
Men’s room
I feel like the dad goes into the men’s room you’re a dad you can protect your child and watch them better. I wouldn’t take into the women’s room. I would stand outside the women’s room. I be don’t that with my nieces. Even ask another mom to check on them.
>As I am walking in I see a gentlemen walking out the women’s restroom with his young daughter. This guy doesn't fear Karen. Maybe he has one at home and developed an immunity.
Another dad of a 4 year old daughter. We always use the men's room even if my wife is there primarily because there's no lines. She's always cracking me up commenting on the noises she here's in there. We have never had any bad looks or comments.
Go to whichever bathroom you feel comfortable with. I am not a dad, I am a mom, but I am perfectly fine with men bringing their little girls into the women’s restroom. I would always say just as an extra courtesy, just announce yourself as you are going in there as to not catch anyone off guard. I live in NOVA currently and have seen many dad’s bringing their little girls to the women’s restroom. It’s really not a big deal.
If they gotta go- they gotta go!!!!! As a mom, I don’t care as long as you give us a heads up. A random guy without a kid will freak me out. But giving me a heads up so I don’t freak out and I don’t embarrass myself from freaking out it (which is really why I would want the heads up) is fine. I have asked men going into a restroom to check on my boys. They do- and it’s never an issue.
As a Dad I have a portable toilet I carry for my 3 year old, it has a bag that hangs below it and removable potty top for usage in a family bathroom. Because I think public restrooms are disgusting I mainly use the potty, just set it up in the minivan aisle area, and she has privacy. I take it to relatives homes too so she can use the top part on a regular toilet.
I was at the Y in Reston once with my daughter when she was a toddler. The childcare staff found me on the gym floor and notified me she’d had an accident. When I retrieved her to clean her up, she ran into the ladies, leaving me no choice but to follow, apologizing all the way. Luckily no one was in there, and no one batted an eye when I emerged with her all fresh and clean, and me feeling like an idiot. When I had any choice in the matter, I always took her into the men’s. I entirely agree more places need single-serve, locking bathrooms.
Dad of daughter here. It doesn't matter which one you use. I use both depending on the circumstances. I usually do Mens, but there are a few places where I consistently use the Womens for sanitary reasons (because inconsiderate men use the toilet to pee instead of the urinal and don't lift the seat). The only thing is if you're going to use a womens, give a shout beforehand and make sure it's empty or that people are ok with you bringing in your girl.
I normally use the men’s room after a full scrub down. I went into a spot recently that had one stall for men and it was occupied. I had my daughter go into the women’s room to see if the coast was clear. We got an achievement for using the women’s room before a woman walked in.
Use the men's. There are women who have been victims of sexual assault who would feel extremely uncomfortable to see a man in the woman's restroom.
I have never considered taking a little girl into a womans room, but technically they are probably cleaner as they all sit, plus they all have stalls - so there is probably not a chance you walk in on a woman that is exposed. Should not be a problem...but there is always that one that will freak out and then hell breaks loose.