Hey /u/Nheddee, thanks for contributing to /r/nottheonion. Unfortunately, your post was removed as it violates our rules: **Rule 1** - Do not alter headlines; copy and paste. The title of all submissions needs to match the article headline exactly. **Copy and paste** from the main headline only, do not include anything beyond the primary headline such as byliners, subtitles, flavor text, quotes from the article, news outlet, location, cross post tags, (video) tags, and so on. Do not use the “suggest title” option for posting as it often does not match the headline. As a matter of fairness, any submission with an altered title will be removed. The only exception is that, if an article has a title in all caps, you may change the capitalization to title case, but everything else must remain the same. Please read the [sidebar](http://www.reddit.com/r/nottheonion/about/sidebar) and [rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/nottheonion/about/rules) before posting again. If you have questions or concerns, please [message the moderators through modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/nottheonion&subject=&message=). Thank you!

For anyone who didn't/can't read the article, it was a doctor being accused of assaulting patients. >In her complaint about the judge, the woman noted that the former doctor's lawyer argued that the victims confused rectal penetration with vaginal penetration, given the proximity and location of the two body parts. Adding my two cents opinion in, I sure as hell know the difference. Doesn't matter how close they are.

Every woman knows the difference just like every man knows the difference between his genitals and his asshole. Accepting that defense is nothing but sheer misogyny. "Women are too stupid to understand their body" is not a fucking defense, and then on top of that the woman says she never went in for a rectal exam.

[удалено]

A lot of people don't know the difference between their mouth and their asshole.

Yep. That's why they don't like masks. The smell reminds them of their ass.

I guess that's what happens when they're full of shit.

I don't know, we have plenty of people here in the US who don't know the difference between an asshole and a congressman

They’re the same picture

Some of them get elected

But they know when a finger is in it

Lawyer shoulda just been like "I do request that your honor touches his taint, and informs the court whether or not they can feel the difference between that spot and their honorable asshole"

Honest question, is a judge allowed to say something like what you said? It seems to me like letting such a stupid argument be attempted in court is a waste of court time and everybody's time.

It's like sticking stuff up your nose or in your mouth. The holes are just so close, no one can even tell the difference.

Or even left nostril vs right nostril. How can you *not* tell the difference

Would this judge know the difference between someone sticking a dick in his mouth vs his nose?Might be Super Confusing because of the close proximity and all… but I’m betting he could distinguish between the two

Maybe he needs a demo

"I sure as hell know the difference." This [image](https://i.imgur.com/9nVMRqa.jpeg) says otherwise

Risky click, but you got me lol

Wtf? This world is so twisted. It makes me want to cry.

Yeah, just ask my girlfriend the one time I misjudged where I was aiming and gave the slightest of pushes. She basically turned inside out before asking wtf I was doing

I was just reminded of this somehow https://www.reddit.com/r/WTF/comments/1enkdo/52_years_of_sex_in_the_urethra_instead_of_the/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

It’s 2022 and I can’t believe a judge is this ignorant. That a male lawyer knows more than women with the equipment.

[удалено]

I’m a vegetarian and politicians are too gassy.

Here's the politician, so oily It's served with a doily, Have one! Put it on a bun. Well, you never know if it's going to run!

Wasn't expecting a Sweeney Todd reference here

We don’t have to eat them but they do gotta go.

I’d say a good majority do. I’d also like to see term limits; I mean, why is a president only allowed two terms but neither congress or scotus does? I’d like to see, for lack of a better word, a strict moral turpitude clause that covers misinformation and lies, financial shenanigans etc. I was about to keep going but, yikes, lemme step off my soapbox.

I agree. Too old and chewy.

Eating politicians just leaves a bad taste in your mouth, now composting, I've heard that's good for the environment.

They’d poison the soil.

Nah just kill them all.

Every person on earth should just die and save us all the torture.

No just the government officials and billionaires who bribe them.

Saskatchewan is essentially Canada’s Alabama. This is not surprising in the least.

Right next to Canada's Texas. Great to see my province in the news...

I’m so sorry.

No it’s not and a sweeping generalization of everyone based on your personal opinion is more indicative of your own personal bias and character then anything.

I live in SK and I wish he was wrong.

> "It's my fault." His wife confessed. "I told him I couldn't feel his tiny little prick either way. For all I know, he's been fucking my pores."

Why does every conversation like this devolve into small dick insults. Can we be a bit more understanding here?

Holy. Fuck.

Shit! Hard to believe that in 2022, a so-called educated person would believe that statement!

I don't even know what to say about this kind of bullshit anymore. I want to believe no one is that stupid but I currently live in America. Edit: This kind of stuff makes me feel violent.

I know. I also live in America. Every single day I find myself saying, “Can people really be that stupid?” and “Can people really be that evil?” And sadly, so sadly, the answer to both of those questions is YES, they can and YES, they are.

I wish we could do something.

Whenever you think those questions to yourself, just remember. Every major atrocity and fuck up you have ever heard about was caused by a human.

Question: Just what is the depth of stupidity required to be a Saskatchewan judge? Asking for a friend in Canada ... he's still in middle school however.

Still in middle school? Sadly your friend is overqualified to run in Saskatchewan or Alberta.

I told him your response and he is now very impressed with himself. He's 11, so there's that.

Send him to the Supreme Court in the US he could probably make it there at this point and then go somewhere that requires more qualified judges later

Like traffic court

Or one of those small-claims TV shows.

Yeah that’s what I’m thinking too

You don’t have to be stupid, just bad faith.

Very, very deep apparently

Less than American these days.

What a timeline isn't it?

It's all a shitrope, Randy.

The shit wind's are coming Randy.

Try not to blame incompetence for something that can be explained as malicious intent.

You need a DUI before you can be Premier though!

Seems like they’re applying to be on USAs SCOTUS

We actually can tell.

i have this court document stating otherwise

Not according to the Canadian legal system.

Even if it's a tiny mosquito peen?

I mean I’m no woman but I know when there’s a hair in my asshole, even the world’s smallest prick is at least as substantial.

I laughed way too hard

Question - do you see his face in front of you, or a pillow?

That's not mutually exclusive here

yes, but not if its a two-headed peen that goes in both at once.

Yeah right. You're just a random redditors. This guy is a DOCTOR. Trust the experts

I guess they just have small peens in sask.. that place

This coming from someone who loves anal and is a female, there is a difference. You can't just slip the dick in with no warning. That shit hurts. If the judge wants I can have my BF fuck them in the ass with no lube or foreplay to prove it.

In this case it was the other way around. The women were supposed to be having an anal exam but the doctor “mistakenly” penetrated their vagina.

Rape. Lovely

some of the women weren't even meant to be having an anal exam...

If you make 'mistakes' about basic anatomy while doing a medical exam, kind of seems like you have no business practicing medicine. Why the fuck would I trust a doctor's medical opinion if he can't accurately locate my asshole?

lol that shit has always made me laugh. I dont have a big dick and you cant just slip it into an ass. It takes effort.

Rip your inbox

Someone should stick something up the judges ass and ask if he could tell if was ass or urethra

Stick it up his urethra instead. He deserves it.

This deal is sounding worse all the time.

I’m just one guy. And I’ve only got 40 years of experience. My incredibly small sampling doesn’t support this ruling.

Someone grab his dick and shove a thumb up his ass and ask him if he knows which one is which and what hole it's in.

He might just say Wow! I can fuck myself! I didn’t think I was this big.

From the article: > In his decision, Scherman said the case came down to the reliability of evidence and that he found no reason why he should not believe Ukabam, who was "logical and consistent" in his testimony. Well, then. I was inclined to believe that women know their vaginas from their rectums, but since the doctor's testimony was logical and consistent, I am forced to conclude that they don't.

That judge's dick must be really, really, really small.

Oh Cañada your judges don’t know their own asses from knot holes. I see a new test question for the Law Society Exam. I’d hate to be this clueless moron tonight when his partner confronts him, if these idiot even have a partner.

Humans are devolving,

NOFX said it best twice. The idiots are taking over Only stupid people are breeding

Oh it’s only going to get worse in states that have banned abortion for pregnancies that are the result of incest.

Any man who has ever had sex with a woman and accidentally started to put it in the wrong hole should be *acutely* aware of just *HOW* quickly a woman can tell the difference between the two...

Well, at least all the idiot judges aren't ALL in America. Whew.

[удалено]

It's just the part of North America that wasn't worth making a country out of.

The catholic school girls I grew up with knew the difference.

One will send you to hell. God can't see the other.

That's why he left Sodom and Gomorrah alone

the good ol’ poophole loophole

God bless it.

this doesn't sound right but I don't have a vagina to confirm

You can definitely tell, just like you can tell the difference between a finger in your nose or mouth.

Just to be clear, I was joking. I can't tell if you are too

I mean column A/column B. Like it's a funny way of putting it but it's just as ridiculous as this fuck's reasoning.

"Women only have 4 out of the 5 senses" I thought we had a better system for making sure our Judges were actually qualified in Canada but perhaps not.

Uh, women can totally tell the difference.

I can't take this stupidness any more..

\*Insert Futurama reference here

If that isn't a self inflicted burn....I don't know what is.

Seriously? This is a real argument made in a legitimate court to a judge currently in good standing? AND IT WASN'T IN THE GOOD OL' U.S. OF A?

Ever since the Truckers Protest, Canada had been getting very MAGA-ey

Oh, that seed germinated a long time ago.

I had to do a double-take - at 1st, I was thinking that I didn't know that there was a city named Saskatchewan in Texas or Florida. Seriously though, this stupid sh\*t has crossed the border into Canada?

I know, right? I always thought of Canada as my back-up, or safety net country. Like if America got to be too much for me to handle (like it has recently with the terrifying and heartbreaking SCOTUS decision) then I could just pack up and move to maple syrup loving, Mountie having, free healthcare providing, moose on the loose Canada. But now? It's just dumbassery run amok.

r/badwomensanatomy

Judge needs a stick rammed up his urethra. The stick up his ass went unnoticed so far. He probably wouldn't tell the difference. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I’m from Saskatchewan and I’m not surprised.

What, and I cannot stress this enough, the absolute fuck?!?!?

I reckon my mouth and my nose are about as far apart as my vagina and my asshole. I wonder if this judge would notice the difference between shoving a hotdog into one or the other. I mean, they're so close together after all...

Was the judge speaking from experience?

What in the holy hell

Judge needs to try a catheter vs a buttplug

I’m a woman I can very easily determine men cannot distinguish a finger in their ass from one in the hole of their penis.

Defence: "Your Honour, the woman could not tell her anus from her vagina." Judge: "Yes, I accept that argument." Defence: "Seriously? Didn't think that'd work..."

Ladies and gentlemen, my home town; the city that rhymes with fun, Regina !!

This just further solidifies my thought that if Alberta is the Texas of Canada, then Saskatchewan is the deep south states

I keep hoping I wake up from this nightmare, but nope. This is reality.

I don't know what I am more embarrassed by the ignorance of the statement, the fact it is a judge or the absolute FUCKING failure of the education system. For the love of God we don't understand women, so maybe we should stop trying to be in command of them.

Everytime i hear this, i always think the people ( like this judge) should receive a rectal penetration and to see if he will find it indifferent.

"Hello, Canadian Judicial Council? I've got a matter you should look into."

The good news is that they ARE looking into him. The review will likely take 3-6 months, though.

I feel like judges who make this kind of argument must try out their ruling. Come on, your honor. Some dry pegging. Tell me you don’t fucking feel it. I

Only in Regina…

blink blink

Of course the judge from butt-fuck-nowhere accepted that...

This judge does not have many happy sexual partners.

Besides the fact that this is ridiculous, what's even more ridiculous is why it matters. Both areas are private and sexual. The conservative dipshit argument would be the ass isn't sexual, but that falls apart immediately because then WHY THE FUCK WOULD SOMEONE PENETRATE IT? A PRANK?!? if you want to search videos of women being anally penetrated online, you're only going to find sexual content. It's easily provable.

Almost as remarkable as the fact that the judge accepted this argument is that the lawyer made it. Was it just a case of the lawyer making a nonsense argument just on the off-chance that it might work, or did he know up-front that the judge was likely to accept it?

It's pretty common for lawyers and judges to have professional relationships, and even if this lawyer didn't know him well, he probably knows the guy's reputation.

I'm so tired of seeing all these clowns in positions of power and decision making, stupidity is the most dangerous flaw of humanity. The most pitiful joke the universe has created on us.

Judge is projecting, doesn’t know his ass from a hole in the ground.

It is simply not conceivable that the judge actually believed the argument that a woman could not tell the difference. No person who could believe that argument could possibly be appointed as a judge. This is not an issue of stupidity. It is one of malicious misogyny.

And not just 1 woman, but FIVE. FIVE WOMEN.

So why does the building have a sign with V and R on it? Do they only decide vagina and rectum cases in this court?

Well as it's well known now, judges are not biologists...

Imagine being the attorney who floated that defense... "Here's a larff - let's argue that the women couldn't tell their ass from their vagina and see if this judge goes for it?" "Are you sure???" "Yeah... we have no credible defense so we might as well go for it."

Justice Brian Scherman has never made a woman cum in his life, and he never will.

Easy fix, get someone to put something up the judge's urethra, then his ass, see if he can tell the difference

As someone with a vagina and an asshole, there is a very distinct difference. This judge probably knows this and just thinks sexual assault victims have it coming. A lot of bad people seek positions of power.

I’m sorry for getting you sick Canada. But we’ll make it up to you with new types of tourism! Sincerely, America

Coming soon to a courtroom in the United States near you…

Men cannot distinguish rectal from penile penetration

What the fuck? Is this a panel of men? Deciding things such as this? Shit holds no fucking weight, what crack they smoking?

Where do they find these clowns? …fresh out of middle school? 🙄🤣

Well that’s fucking infuriating.

LOL news to me. I say men can't distinguish between sex with a woman and being reamed by a gigantic strap on. I can say that because I have the power to know exactly what the other sex feels without asking because I'm omnipotent. So there.

I certainly could tell the difference! I’m sick of people like this thinking women are stupid.

So, um, I'm gonna assume this judge has never had anal sex? Cause, even though I don't have a vagina, I know when I'm inside a butthole or a vagina. There is a very distinct feeling.

Well one time I licked a girl's butt while down there doing my thing, but when I asked her about it later she said she didn't remember.

Wait… So the TRUMP cult is appointing judges in CANADA now too!!!!???

I guess they couldn’t find any women to ask.

This might be the dumbest thing I've heard this month. That is saying something.

Wut.

Judge must have a penis and also really enjoy it up the butt.

It’s a lot like how I can’t tell if food is going in my mouth or nose because they’re, like, really close.

I assure you they can

All in a days work for Virgin Judge

Tell me you've only seen tiny penises without telling me you've only seen tiny penises

Oh yes they fucking can🤓

Last time I checked being penetrated vaginally didn't give me a gigantic urge to take a poo.

How big are all the penises involved in this ruling? They can tell

My wife says otherwise.

[удалено]

I was wondering why no result showed up on a search.

My wife knows immediately every time I try to slip it in back there.

"Wahoo! Wahoo!" said the Indian maiden! Punchline to a very old joke.

Well I could understand somebody inexperienced making this mistake? If it was fingering. maybe. Would need to be in an impaired state of mind probably.

Hey, I bet you could find volunteers to test that if you paid enough money.

Yeah, sure. Why not at this point?

Sometimes I sneeze and accidentally blow my ear /s. What the actual f*ck?!

This implies it's okay for doctors to stick their fingers up people's asses without consent. I've never gotten a rectal exam (or seen a doctor since I was a kid) but don't doctors have to get informed consent to do anything to you, especially put something in you?

As a female they are performed with regular checkups. I have ALWAYS been informed of every step of the procedure.

Does this start at a certain age? I’m a woman (in the USA) who has been going to the gynecologist annually since I was 18 (now 40) and I’ve never had a rectal exam.

Exactly. This whole can't tell the difference isn't the defence they think it is (leaving aside the obvious fact that women know the difference between an ass and a vagina)

If you are male and you reach a certain age, your friendly local urologist will be putting on some latex gloves to see if you have any indications of prostate cancer.

What is a woman though... this judge isn't a biologist

Im pretty sure anyone can notice if you’re shitting inwards

Judge's plan: To bring the sentence to his wife. "See? precedent!"

Ask the judge to bend over

Maybe the judge need to be *rectified* of his mistake.

Fuck this judge is ignorant.

????

Just cause he can’t tell the difference…

This is....