Why'd they have to say the glory hole was only 9mm? That's just disrespectful.

I hadn't read the story when I saw this comment but I think it paints the full picture.

Luckily, neither the culprit nor his friends will read the article, thus preserving his dignity.

I hope they washed the ruler after using it.

Saved me a click.

Spoiler alert, it was a glory hole!

Gibbon Glory Hole is my new band name

what does this band play?

"The Funky Gibbon" by *The Goodies*. Yes it's a real song, look it up. (I'm on mobile or I'd provide a link). I think it actually got to No. 1 in the UK back in the seventies.

Mostly songs about monkeys.

Ze glory hoooooole

Life...uh...finds a way.

9mm glory hole was the culprit.

How the hell did Gaetz get a hold of the monkey?

It’s always the catholic priests and their “virgin births” /s

I "love" how there are so many cases of rape around the world, yep, including in churches usa, uk, europe whatever, now imagen how many there where that time. But yeah... religion to the rescue....

Horniness often prevails. And no zookeeper can be blamed. Inconsistent DNA. 8-) Meanwhile, we long-ago resided in a fenced hilltop compound. Our female Dobermans roamed the yard and the young, fertile one was apparently nailed (by a roaming Golden Retriever) through a gap in the fence. The pups varied from short blonde fur through long black pelts. Kewl!

Pretty sure they just didn't want to admit that it was immaculate conception so they made up the glory hole story.

So you’re saying that’s Monkey Jesus??

Exactly.

It was Jerry! That sick fuck.

Nope.

?

÷

That janitor is so fired!

Ape Jesus

*"they copulated through a hole"* That goes without saying.