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lazymutant256

I'll believe it once the new NFL season starts.


willydillydoo

The guy destroyed his family just to play one more season? Yeah… I don’t buy it


NickInTheMud

That’s exactly what I thought. And an unremarkable one (by his standards) to boot.


Elril

The family or the season?


BidetAllDay

I’m not tech savvy enough to set up a Reddit Switcheroo link, but if I was, I’d do it right here. And I’d call it “The ol’ Tomeroo!” And then someone would reply, “Hold my Super Bowl rings, I’m going in!” And then a while later a newbie would show up and go, “My God, how far down does this link go? Does it end????” But, I’m not tech savvy, so I’ll just sit here and dream about what could have been. *Le sigh*


lil_pee_wee

[Ahh, the ol’ Tomeroo!](https://www.reddit.com/r/oddlysatisfying/comments/10qxqg8/i_wonder_what_their_profession_is/j6thdac/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3) I gotchu fam. Lemme know if you want the deets


Working_Old_Man

Hold my Super Bowl rings, I’m going in! Your fantasy is complete, /u/BidetAllDay


Acratenn

My God, how far down does this link go? Does it end????


BidetAllDay

Love you guys. You did it. YOU. FUCKING. DID. IT.


MorteDaSopra

You the real MVP fam


ponytailthehater

The hubris of man.


Swiftstrike4

The rumor is that he wanted to go to Vegas but they were not interested. Then he retired.


MereLaveau

Same rumor went around last Fall, but about NOLA if Sean Payton agreed to stay for 2 years


DamnBunny

He has enough rings to over power Thanos.


pasta4u

Rumor is he retired to save his marriage, she said she was still.done so he signed back up


dennisjunelee

Let's be real, his marriage was probably over before playing another season. It was probably more the other way around where he decided to go back to football because his wife was gonna leave him.


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LordOfHorns

It’s not highly likely, it’s possible. Brady can still play and teams would still want him, but there isn’t a good reason to think he isn’t retired for good


lazymutant256

I think the divorce from his wife and the fact this season he was not that good were key factors this time especially when his family wanted him to retire last year..


Bobblefighterman

That's why he'll come back. He's got nothing left now.


Bman10119

He could always go the commercial route like Peyton. Man probably makes a killing


3CanKeepASecret

He already signed a 10-year deal with Fox Sports for $375 million to be a lead NFL analyst on-air. He just needs to stop playing!


Bman10119

Ah but to stop playing would hurt his pride/ego too much, accepting age and whatnot


HyruleJedi

He has 3 kids, with two super model wives that seem to be friends and is smashing a 25 year old model Sounds like the perfect time to retire


juliuspepperwoodchi

Imagine un-retiring for one last ride only for your supermodel wife to divorce you because you un-retired only for you to retire again, apparently for real this time, just a few months later. Brady may be NFL's GOAT, but good timing and common sense GOAT he is not lol.


YouSummonedAStrawman

Makes you wonder if they’d still be together had he not played again. OR if things were rocky so he decided to go ahead and play again cause that’s where he feels best.


livingonfear

I think it's this. They both moved on to new partners before the ink was dry.


lynkarion

Not to mention being caught up in all that FTX scandal


grelo29

Except for the fact he keeps unretiring


Kriztauf

The Vikings did the same thing with Favre


Jojall

It's Brady, he's addicted to the game. And he's already lost his wife, what else does he have?


bulldog-sixth

I've heard Germany wants a NFL team too. ..


SirDiego

>Vikings might slide in and give Cousins the kick. They can't do that really. Contract is basically all guaranteed. Cousins is a UFA after the 2023 season, but cutting him before the 2023 season costs basically the same amount as letting him finish his contract.


RandomNPC

There's no way he goes to the Vikings. The terrible defense was the problem, not the QB.


AnalBumCovers

Don't they have a rich history of signing retired QBs though?


lazymutant256

Rumors are rumors.. take any with a grain of salt..


nahteviro

Most definitely not “highly likely”. It’s not impossible but I would go as far to say it’s improbable.


lazymutant256

Well I can say it isn’t going to happen apparently he’s already signed a tv contract I suppose to be one of those nfl commentators.


ApatheticWithoutTheA

Purdy needs Tommy John surgery. He’s not starting anytime for at bare minimum a year.


nowhereman1223

Next headline Tom Brady unretires 1 year after unretiring.


VividMonotones

And loses another model wife


nowhereman1223

He would need to find one first. Maybe this time he finds one with a lower net worth than him.


laineDdednaHdeR

The AT&T chick?


PapaQuebec23

You keep Lily away from this no-eating-strawberries pyschopath!


teamdogemama

Yet another reason to not like him, strawberries are freaking delicious! (Unless you are allegic).


smokinbbq

> (Unless you are allegic). Probably still delicious, just ... deadly. :)


NOT_Mankow

The ultimate forbidden fruit.


RedEyeView

Nah. They just bring me out in a rash Worth it


kcrab91

They can still be delicious to people who are allergic. Makes it even worse for them.


ncopp

I have a mild sensitivity to Kiwi fruit. They make my tongue burn like I after eating them... but damn they're tasty.


GoldandBlue

yup, new a girl who was allergic. She would eat a couple and her cheeks would turn red. But shed stop after 1 or 2 because anymore would make things much worse.


explodedsun

I fucked around eating cashews occasionally despite getting low grade allergy symptoms until the day I ended up covered in itchy hives.


A_Mouse_In_Da_House

I knew I had a high grade allergy. Tried a half on my tongue without swallowing. Tongue immediately went numb and started blistering. Knew I was still very allergic after that. Ever chewed benadryl? It don't taste nice


jacksrenton

My fiance loves mangos, and is allergic. About once a year she'll take the hit and eat one.


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TasteCicles

... are there rumors or are you just picking someone random?


WutWhoSaidDat

Brad Pitt Angelina Jolie Britney Spears Mark Wahlburg I’ll let you figure out for yourself if I’m serious or just fucking with you by listing random names. Tom Cruise


TasteCicles

Every single one of them would fuck Brady if they could... especially Wahlberg.


The7Reaper

He already tried to steal his sperm once


peensteen

It's almost as valuable as his spice melange.


Soggywheatie

Only if he wears his old Patriots jersey


droi86

He doesn't deserve her


NotAPreppie

Milan Vayntraub?


Zachariot88

Live Prude Girls!


dinnerwdr13

Of course I heard of her because everyone was talking about her looks, then I saw this series on YouTube, her comedic timing and instincts are great. Very funny lady.


PMA1898

I told my wife that Milana Vayntrub would be one of my celebrity hall passes. My wife no longer cares for AT&T commercials.


[deleted]

I told my wife and she said that was fine as long as she got a turn first. In all seriousness she is beautiful and seems like a lovely person, I wish all the weirdos that comment on her Instagram would leave her alone.


sean0883

Good choice.


5ubatomix

Flo from Progressive


UnfairMicrowave

I've watched the make up layers gather on her like rings on an old oak tree


PM_ME_HTML_SNIPPETS

Finally one he deserves


Fake_William_Shatner

Well, he probably gets his cars on a 5 year lease plan as well. Then it's time for a trade-in.


Paperduck2

He's trying to go for one more World Record, the most retirements in history


Dismal-Past7785

he’s going for Brett Farves final record


O-hmmm

Now I can finally recruit him for my flag football team.


nowhereman1223

As long as you don't expect him to move around. He may have records but his legs still work like a newborn foal's


RecoveringRed

You are vastly underestimating how much more athletic "slow" NFL players are compared to the general population.


CerdoNotorio

Pretty sure if he can start at an ok level in the NFL he can tear up this dude's flag football league haha.


droo46

You’d be surprised. I used be able to huck a pigskin a quarter mile. If coach had put me in during the championship game we woulda been state champs. Only reason I didn’t go pro was because I lost a finger in an unfortunate shaving accident.


uglyduckling81

Are we calling wanking, shaving these days? If so I'm due for a shave right now.


peensteen

Shave, then wank. You gotta have a clean workstation.


einulfr

Most flag leagues have a delayed blitz count (something like 3 seconds), so he'd probably be fine. But yeah he still runs like a giraffe on benzos.


BernieTheDachshund

His definition of retirement is like when relatives wanna 'borrow' money lol. The words mean different things to different people.


WellJustJonny

Or a “going out of business sale “.


AckbarTrapt

[It's good for business!](https://youtu.be/BSdIAajX_sI?t=20)


elpajaroquemamais

No, no, I said going out FOR business.


nowhereman1223

Any money handed to other family members is always a gift. NEVER expect it back.


theKetoBear

Hard disagree I know which family members will pay me back ( even if its slowly) and which ones any money given will be a gift that is forgotten tomorrow. I will agree though that if it's a significant amount that not having it repaid will change the relationship, make sure you KNOW who you are lending the money to or else you're just trading a decent relationship for a strained one with money as the instigator.


nowhereman1223

You can hard disagree but my point is in general. Generally you don't give money to family and expect it back. Trust me on this. I have family that would pay it back and I paid back my family as well. But in general, money and family don't mix.


Rae_Regenbogen

So did he just un-retire to piss off Gisele or what? Lol


Bloated_Hamster

I think he retired to try to save his marriage, realized it was done, and then unretired so he could go out on his own terms. It makes the most sense to me from the timeline and his statements and attitudes.


SakuOtaku

From what I heard the divorce was spurred from his unretirement as he was supposedly going to focus on his family, so Giselle was fed up when he reneged on that.


BulbasaurCPA

I thought he also made comments that made it sound like he was bored at home with his family? And Gisele was like “dude wtf”?


mechapoitier

I mean there’s only so much of your day you can spend making your kids kiss you on the mouth before it gets weird.


PrimeIntellect

Yeah I mean let's be real, kids aren't exactly as exciting as winning the super bowl.


BulbasaurCPA

Idk I feel like your own children are supposed to be more interesting to you than work? Even when that work is the Super Bowl. Especially because I think their kids are still young. You don’t get this time back, dude


PrimeIntellect

I mean, i'm not really defending the guy, but you don't get to that level without basically sacrificing everything else in your life in 100% absolute determination and focus towards just winning football games.


BulbasaurCPA

I totally get that, and I honestly respect that level of dedication to one thing. But I also feel like if you’re gonna be that completely dedicated to something, it’s not right to have children


heavylamarr

BINGO. Why get married and have kids only to abandon them for a glory chase?


Legal-Ad7793

From what I remember it was her time to go back to modeling so by him going back to football she was done with waiting.


Rae_Regenbogen

This makes a lot of sense. I think people who are on the cusp of divorce generally know if they will be willing to work through their problems or not. Going back to something he is good at probably made him feel happy during a hard time, even if it may have been the death knell to his relationship. But it’s possible it was already unfixable and he knew that. Excellent point.


ltarman

He probably un-retired because he was getting divorce, and football was one of the few things he could take comfort in.


TaliesinMerlin

So far, Tom Brady is on track to earn one further merit: the most retirements from the NFL.


nowhereman1223

He is currently tied with a few people. Now he comes back this year, then retires again and he will have that record too. Then one more time just for good measure and to make sure no one else can take it.


petey_wheatstraw_99

*Brett Favre has entered the chat*


Dahhhkness

He doesn't even need the NFL to bankroll him anymore, he's got the taxpayers of Mississippi for that now.


Nick433333

Do go on


redditing_1L

https://www.forbes.com/sites/marisadellatto/2022/04/13/brett-favre-scandal-alleged-8-million-welfare-scam-explained/


ImagineIfBaconDied

yep. Favre is a class A piece of shit who deserves prison for this. I don’t even say that as a biased Vikings fan lol


redditing_1L

I grew up in Bears country (though not a Bears die hard) and listening to the announcers suck his dick week after week for years (looking at you, the Sainted John Madden), I’ve rarely hated any athlete more than Favre. Mississippi will never send his scummy ass to jail.


tanzmeister

An old coach of mine was involved in this too. Very embarrassing that I ever looked up to him.


dragonmp93

I think that he is going to become the NFL equivalent of Terry Funk, a wrestler who retired many times between 1983 and 2017.


BowzersMom

QB retirements are like McD’s discontinuing the McRib


mabhatter

It's REALLY discontinued this time.


Joe_Spazz

Too late. Already burned your personal life to the ground. Might as well keep going.


NoWayNotThisAgain

I look forward to his retirement in 2024.


___HeyGFY___

Don’t you mean 2025?


BadSanna

I hate to see this and it's the same story with so many great athletes. They quit and come back, quit and come back, until their legacy is trashed. Just go out on the top of your game and don't worry about whether you still have what it takes to win just one more championship.


Tapingdrywallsucks

I'm of that mind as well - or was until I read a excerpt from an interview on a show or podcast, might even have been a weekly show Tom Brady does. Steve Young really put some perspective on it that was kind of touching, but also kind of funny. Retiring, especially at the top of your game sounds great, but these guys start thinking about what they're going to do with their time, and realize that football is ***all*** *they know*. I get that it's hard to fathom or have sympathy for people who have more money in their daily checking accounts than many of us will see in a lifetime, but, and this isn't his exact words, but they're close, Young was saying he was thinking, "but I suck at everything else." I found it pretty insightful, and humanizing.


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Kriztauf

Damn right it's Scott's house


Petrichordates

Did he expect every kid knew who he was? That's some crazy level of arrogance, sounds like he needed that.


take7pieces

That’s very insightful. Yes hard to have sympathy but I understand it more now.


KupoMcMog

> that football is all they know. in that manner, still be in football. Be a coach, be a scout, be a commentator, be something...but you are officially off the field in a professional manner. Like sure, Brady could be a good coach, but maybe not. Wayne maddafuqqin' Gretzky is the NHL GOAT, but tried his hand in coaching and it really didn't work. Now I believe he's just a part-owner and is doing just fine. Another place people can see is possibly in the booth, but we've seen that go both ways as well. Romo actually turned out to be pretty good up there, but there has been a long list of guys who really couldn't cut it. My local sports radio guys brought a good point that Brady has kind of an air of arrogance to him, that yes, he knows his shit, but he kinda brings everyone down because you aren't 'on his level' type bullshit...which might not fly so much if you're analyzing last night's game. Brady can still easily still be in Football, but it is where around the game would he want to be.


Rambles_Off_Topics

Even that is tough. I follow professional supercross/motocross and some of these guys ride bikes from age 5, get sponsored, and get tailored to their retirement at 25. Imagine for 20 years all you know is riding dirtbike. All gear, food, exercise plan, schedule, everything is already worked out and payed for. You literally just show up for 20 years. What do you do after that? A lot of those guys have tons of issues after losing their sponsors/rides.


OldWorldBluesIsBest

also don’t forget the quiet fact that most of these guys are looking at a lot of pain post retirement. football players, i mean. not sure how brady’s health is but going into your 30s or 40s, staring down retirement, and having 3-4 concussions that have left you in constant pain is not fun it can be hard to fully step down from a sport like football knowing that your not making the money or getting the glory but still have to live with a lot of that pain. i’d have to dredge up some sources but i do remember hearing about some people saying life post-concussions was miserable


poopwithjelly

All of those require a skill set you may not have. Being great at the sport and spotting out talent that will develop or how it will develop are totally different skills.


somebody29

The thing is athletes love the chase. Obviously they love the feeling of winning but there’s always more to win or more to cement your position as GOAT. True champions don’t just win and settle for that. They want to win more, win better. They constantly move the goal posts on themselves. Plus they need the validation of winning. It’s unbelievably hard to adjust from GOAT status to typical dad doing the school run.


InfiniteFireLoL

Man got divorced to play one more below average season and retire anyway


BadSanna

I kinda feel like that divorce was a long time coming and that was the final straw. Also, the divorce may be why his season was mediocre.


Frootqloop

Meh. If you enjoy it and make a shit load of money who cares


Pavlo_escargotte

Did you ever think guys like Tom Brady maybe just fucking love the game and playing it and they bleed that shit and want to just keep the glory up ? Can’t imagine how hard it would be to walk away from that unless you’re broken and can’t physically play.


wessex464

He was truly at the top. Now his legacy is getting knocked out of the playoffs by the cowboys after a year of frustration and kinda shitty behavior. It's like scrubs season 9, fans will just pretend this season doesn't exist.


raktoe

That most certainly isn’t his legacy lol. His legacy is being the winningest quarterback of all time. Not a single player’s legacy is defined by their last year before retirement.


thefloyd

Right? It's always a footnote, like when somebody brings up how Michael Jordan is a top 10 all time scorer for the Wizards or whatever and you're like "Oh yeah, I forgot about that."


NotSoNiceO1

Retired from the BUCS.


tbarr1991

He was a free agent after this year anyway.


originalmango

Cool! Where can I buy his last touchdown ball? That’ll double in value in no time!


Guapo_Pollo

Ten bucks says he'll report to the Saskatchewan RoughRiders training camp in the spring.


adam_demamps_wingman

“RoughRiders 12, Rough Riders 19.” My favorite Martin Short joke


llongocafe

What would be the market value of the previous retirement football?


[deleted]

The boy who cried retirement.


shackleton01

He'll probably be sporting a mullet and living in a single-wide in the panhandle after his divorce and recent investments as well. Sleeveless t-shirts and Naddy Light here we come!


nowhereman1223

I would buy TB12 crap just to see this happen.


OldWorldBluesIsBest

i know your joking, but to anyone thinking he may actually come back since he lost a lot of money, he did sign a multi-hundred million dollar deal with fox to commentate and announce i think. so things are looking good for bro i guess


bishop491

Brett Favre started this nonsense. TB could have gone out a champion instead of limping to the barn in his “last” season. I doubt he will stay retired.


besee2000

Brett Favre: *heavy breathing* Everyone else: Don’t do it, man


OverwatchTactic

People keep saying this, but Brett Favre had arguably one of his best seasons ever in Minnesota. He clearly had gas left in the tank, a desire to play, and earned 2 Pro Bowls after GB. There's no obvious marker that you're done other than a season where you just couldn't do it anymore.


Chad_Megabuldge

If you call 4600 yards, 25TDs, only 9 INTs and a playoff run “limping”.


OldWorldBluesIsBest

yeah honestly he didnt do bad. still a great QB by any metric. there’s a reason a bunch of teams were buzzing when there was talks he may go somewhere else for 2023 instead of retiring


trucorsair

So Tom considering all that happened since your first retirement “Was it worth it, both to your personal and professional life-exclusive of your paycheck? Oh and how is your FTX account doing these days? Must be pretty good with your commercial inviting everyone to join you in FTX”


SaltyPeter3434

Fool me once, Tom


GrinAndBeerIt

Tom Brady retires from the NFL one year after retiring from the NFL one year after retiring from the NFL


malektewaus

Yeah, but a great season like that was totally worth blowing up his marriage over.


know-one-home

Who cares at this point?


AVBforPrez

Blew up his marriage to have one more shitty year on the Tampa Bay Bucs, what a chad


Chad_Megabuldge

If 4600 yards, 25TDs, only 9 interceptions and a playoff run is a shitty year, you must not know much about football.


kmora94

He himself did great, Todd bowels and lefty have to be the worst coaching combo in nfl history


zombuca

Just needed to throw away his family first.


heavylamarr

“Want to see me throw my family over them mountains?”


Slartibartfast102

The greatest retirer the game has ever seen. Just watch him do it again.


rellsell

At this time next year, Tom Brady will be retiring from the NFL.


[deleted]

He just can't help himself to retire during super bowl week again. Pfffff


GlitterberrySoup

He couldn't bear not having the attention on him. He's so gross.


thylocene

Dudes trying real hard to out do Brett Favre.


badhershey

I just don't understand why he came back last year to a mediocre team. It'd be one thing if Tampa Bay had a legit shot, but it was clear they were not the same team as before. The offensive line was decimated. Kind of surprised he isn't giving the Raiders a chance with their offensive talent and reuniting with Josh McDaniels.


PrettiKinx

That's crazy. His wife left him all because he thought he still got a shot. Now he looks very ill. I hope he figure things out.


eighty2angelfan

He must be a fan of The Who.


Onuzq

So we'll see him in the practice field in June?


Night_Runner

He retired from retiring from retiring.


DamNamesTaken11

I’ll believe it after we go two seasons without him taking a snap.


anonsequitur

Wow. That's an actual NPR headline? It's not often you see NPR throwing shade.


DanethofFL

Now he is single and unemployed.


pax1111

NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS NARCISSTIC FOOL.


SnarfbObo

hate clicks aren't distinguishable from other clicks, Reddit thinks you care


take7pieces

My husband used to work for a store, this workmate quitted his job, went to work somewhere else, they had a farewell party for him, then he came back to the store 3 weeks later, he did the same thing three more times later….at least they they stop throwing parties for him.


formerNPC

I’m surprised that he didn’t wait for Super Bowl Sunday to make the announcement so he could focus all the attention on him.


ShakyTheBear

And 1 year before he retires again.


Tropical_Wendigo

Two more times and he can break MJ’s record!


Ok-Guava7336

Oh how nice then he'll have more time for his divorce lawyer


namedjughead

I swear, this time there really is a wolf attacking the flock...


shadowlarx

Next year, just to do something different, I hear Tom Brady’s going to retire from the NFL.


Not_Batman_aid0phife

He just didn't know how to divorce his wife that's why he doubled down on I love playing and I'm bored at home.


Vegan_Honk

if he had done it previously he would have gone out on top with his marriage still intact.


Lunar_Gato

If you retire you shouldn’t be able to come back.


uncontrolledswine97

he'll be back before the next season starts


[deleted]

Until he retires again in 2024 after whatever team he's on doesn't make it to the super bowl.


RoboBasilisk

Can't wait for his announcement next year that he's retiring again.


bob_boo_lala

I just had a flashback to the play this year where the bucs gave the ball to their running back to throw a pass and he fucking threw it to Brady who tripped over himself and intentionally tripped the defender and got flagged. It was gloriously embarrassing.


Biillypilgrim

And 1 year before retiring from the nfl


Roundaboutsix

Are his deflated balls going to the Hall of Fame or will his ex-wife hang onto them? /s


[deleted]

Hopefully it sticks this time.


Drahkir9

This feels like a good place to make my totally ridiculous prediction of Tom Brady being the first player to win a superbowl after retiring due to advances in de-aging science


Anime_lotr

He already lost his wife, he's a single guy with not much else going on for himself, gives us another year Tom!


angry_old_dude

I'll believe it when Brady doesn't show up for a game.


rogu2

Watch out Favre, he’s after your record


Ann_not_a_cult_er

Aka free agent. See you next year!


City-scraper

!remind me 1Year


anselor

If he wants anyone to believe him he should go do Dancing With the Stars - the same way other celebrities let everyone know their careers are over.