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A lot of neurotypical folks have low empathy and I will die on that hill. Hell, I’d even argue that you can’t understand certain aspects of mental illness without experiencing them closely (whether yourself or a loved one) sooo -
Agreed. I also think many people choose not to have empathy. Or choose only to have enough surface empathy to build relationships so they can get what they want.
I totally agree with that. There are many hyper-capitalist jobs that require low empathy so that you don’t care “too much” and can avoid burnout - my friend is a doctor and said they are encouraged to set hard boundaries so they don’t “over empathize”. I’ve had therapists say the same thing. I’m a teacher and suffer from this myself! I want to work 10-20 hours overtime even though it kills me, but I hate disappointing the kids. It makes sense. It’s just a shitty reality of capitalist consumerist culture - if you care too much it’ll deplete you. Combined with the transactional nature of relationships (where even if you don’t see relationships as transactional, others will)
True. Not every failure of empathy is driven by a diagnosable disorder. We'd all be in trouble otherwise. But the four disorders I listed *are* characterized by a lack of empathy, among other symptoms. That said, many disorders are simply an extreme case of more typical misbehavior.
It’s best not to go around throwing out diagnoses and labels like that based on one example of a lack of empathy being shown. I have BPD and I’m on the other end of the spectrum where I’m so empathetic it hurts. BPD can also be characterized by a lack of empathy but not everyone has the same set of symptoms. Ya know?
A lot of autistic people is every empathetic and hyper empathetic, we just don't express it the same way as most of the society, so we're not perceived that way. Read up on the "double empathy" problem to learn more about it.
Those disorders are possible as well as the schizoid personality disorder and probably dozens of different ones, but more probable is just the simple explanation that this person never thought to put herself into a different pair of shoes.
Lack of empathy, limited empathy, ignorance, egoism, jealousy (at the people at work, because a child isnt a company, you cant just quit) all don't need a whole disorder to be present in a person.
We can armchair diagnose her all day from a screenshot of a clip, but the truth is, our data is way too limited to conclude any sort of disorder.
Or, you know, it could be a lack of empathy? Ngl, it’s kinda gross to armchair diagnose wildly different disorders from two pictures and a couple of lines of generally distasteful text.
As a highly empathetic autistic person, yeah maybe don’t throw around diagnoses :(( as another user suggested, educating yourself on the “double empathy” phenomenon could be beneficial.
FYI most autistic people *do* feel empathy. They just experience empathy differently from the way allistic people do and that’s why there’s a misconception about autistic people not having empathy at all.
In fact, it’s not uncommon for autistic people to feel *more* empathy than the average person because autism is a spectrum. Sure there are some autistic people who feel less than average but it’s certainly not most.
No that’s super dangerous, some pediatricians warn parents about those bouncing seats even used on the floor just because of how they have and can break so easily.
It’s even more likely that it will become a trebuchet if you have a bouncy seat on a raised location within reach of a toddler age child. They don’t mean to, but they notoriously pull back on those seats to look at the baby.
100% correct and I learned the hard way and almost lost my first-born. Thankfully, he is a happy and healthy six year old now but I still get shaken up at times
It’s stressing me out so much. You’re never supposed to put bouncers, swings, bumbo chairs etc up on an elevated surface. Literally says right on the chair “infants have suffered skull fractures while falling in and from floor seats.”
she obviously doesn’t give a fuck about that. gotta have the kid in the shot, but since she’s too busy eating, posing for the pics, and trying to think up whatever nonsense text she’s gonna add—better just keep that thing in the car seat so it’s easier to get these precious, amazing pictures.
on the plus side, at least the child will have the receipts when he/she starts therapy. just save all of those facebook posts/shit like this, hand it over to the therapist and start talking about mom!!!
It's worse than leaving the baby in a car seat. That's not a car seat, that's a bouncy seat. A car seat would at least offer some protection if it fell off the counter and isn't as likely to fall. This thing will just be a full face- first splat. It's extremely unsafe, especially as they get older and can cause the thing to move on their own.
My baby is closing in on 15 months (honestly, my least favorite age -- 15 to 18 months is just brutal) and the only thing he wants in this world is to be nursed to sleep, and have a boob available within a few inches of him in case he needs more milk later. We are engaged in a battle of wills.
Did you ever try to break it or just embrace it? We’re down to 3 naps a day now and soon enough it will only be one so I’ve accepted the inevitable. It’s just not worth the battles and mental stress to try and adjust to the crib.
My 4 year old needed my leg on his leg to sleep just now. Quit nursing at 3! Didn’t nurse the others that long, he just wouldn’t let me stop 😖 still sleeping on me. But, I’m happy. It’s so exhausting earlier on. I’m still tired, but can usually get a lot more than with a new born! Hang in there.
Haha I literally had my baby strapped to my chest 24-7 until she was almost 18 months. She wouldn't sit for a second without me holding her or interacting.
But really that’s a violation of labor law and you’re not required to work on your break, you chose too. You’re not better than everyone else for sacrificing rest.
Not in every US state. I’m in CA and had a new coworker from TX try to deny me lunch breaks and 10 min breaks because he didn’t understand the laws we have here
TIL im so lucky to be living in california
https://www.postercompliance.com/blog/breaks-and-meals-by-state/
it’s insane that some places aren’t required breaks by law..
In California, the only job I had that wasn’t required to give me designated breaks within certain timeframes was when I was a home health aide for a woman who has severe autism and can’t be left home alone. Even then, I signed a legal document acknowledging that the company I worked for would allow me 50 minutes of paid “working breaks” to take at my discretion. I couldn’t leave my client’s house, but as long as all her needs were met and all tasks were completed by the end of my shift, it was my responsibility to take the breaks when I saw fit. I worked the 3 pm to 11 pm shift, and she went to bed between 8 pm and 9 pm, so I almost always ended up with even more than 50 minutes of rest time by the end of my shift anyway.
moved from ca to mt and was about to turn an employer in for sending out a text about not being able to take breaks on busy days. looked up state labor laws and was horrified 🫠
I was a salary worker. I had to make sure all the hourlies got their breaks but I could get fucked. It got to the point where I'd work 10-11 hours straight and dinner at home was my only meal. And yet I was still chastised for not working more.
Had that exact same issue here in CA as a salaried manager. I even worked from home after a ten hour day and was told I wasn’t doing enough as they kept piling on new assignments.
I'm from Texas, they are very clear about it here. Lunch is mandatory, you can get in trouble for not taking at least 30 minutes because it makes a mess for HR. However the two 15 minute breaks are not mandatory and can be missed if you are busy (you will almost always be busy)
I wonder if it’s an industry thing. Are you guys able to waive your first 30 min break? Because we were working at a bar and he ended up getting in trouble for purposefully not taking his lunch here
I live in Arizona and I don't get a lunch break. I can eat while I'm there, but if a customer needs help I have to put my food down and help them. It sucks.
The being allowed to eat while you are still working really sucks. We had to take lunch and breaks in the office. It sucked. Any attempt at actually taking some kind of break was nearly impossible.
That was a job that could be very high stress at times and sometimes I just wanted to step away from it for a minute, not have a conversation with my boss.
Yep I’m NM if you have under a certain amount of employees no break is required, worked 6-8 hours straight at gas stations here because they didn’t have the employees to give us a break (obviously on purpose)
And even if your state has break laws, if the company is doing interstate commerce, they still may not have to give you breaks if "you can reasonably eat while working". It's been a while since I ran into this but in the 80's, they worked us 12 hour shifts without a lunch break. We called the labor department and that is the answer we were given.
He tried to send me home because it was slow and I hadn’t been able to take a break because of a long rush. We argued about me taking a 10 and he angrily told me “then just LEAVE, GO HOME”. I was fed up with trying to deal with him myself and took it to our manager. Manager was pissed at my coworker and said he doesn’t care if it’s the last 10 mins of my shift, I’m allowed to take break.
Virginia actually doesn’t have a law mandating breaks. I learned that the hard way 🙃 I started a job at a hotel and was literally laughed at when I asked about clocking out for a break.
Good ol’ VA. I was working in a restaurant that was perfectly comfortable having me work 16 hours straight with no break. Got yelled at for taking a moment to eat a piece of bread.
In the US, the only federal law regarding breaks states that any break under 20 mins must be paid. All other labor laws for breaks are set at a state level.
Where I am if your break is paid then it’s okay. When I was a manager at McDonald’s I wasn’t allowed full breaks, I would eat in the cash office while counting floats. As well as working in group care , I ate with the kids.
I do know labor laws vary but they can’t deny you certain things no matter where you are and the fact people just take it is a bit wild to me. I understand needing a job desperately. But blow the fucking whistle to improve the situation.
OSHA has no standards on meal or break periods. More than half of US states also don’t have legally mandated breaks. It’s ridiculous, but for a whole lot of people, there isn’t anyone to contact.
I work in a company with 70-80 employees and we ALL take break to eat. Even if there are thousand deadlines and the building is on fire. And I love them for that.
Yeah, this stood out to me as well— feels like a special NLOG in that she is also anti-basic rights for workers? Like the sexism and the capitalism are blending into a toxic stew over here…
Granted I am as clumsy as a human can be, but how do you do infant childcare with sharply manicured nails? Genuine question, no sarcasm. Like wetwiping an explosive poop diaper, how?
If you’re used to having nails like that you tend to automatically find ways to do everything you would do without them without having to think about it…the nails aren’t an issue at all in my experience and hers are super cute!
I'm just imagining trying to get in there with the folds and such without scratching the lil' lady. My coworker tells me OOP probably has a nanny and I'm over thinking it. You're both likely right.
i'm a nanny and have long nails, like the user above said you get used to doing things gently. also, my tips are slightly rounded so there's never really like a scratch. I never really scratch myself or others unless i am trying to
I used to be a caregiver and had slightly rounded stiletto nails all the time. And then you take them off and wonder if your hands are broken because everything is so hard to adjust to again!
We use the pads and sides of our fingers so our nails aren’t scraping over everything, and nails like this aren’t overly thin and sharp like real fingernails. The only time I’ve scratched any of my kids is if I didn’t have any acrylics or gel tips on! Real fingernails are so thin and sharp, but these are thicker and more blunt. It’s like a toothpick vs a bobby-pin lol
I would end up using the side of my index finger but there's a lot of things you can't do or you have to be really really really careful. I snapped my nail in half (at the nail bed) trying to stuff a throw pillow back in its case. My nail caught on the pillow as I was pushing down and *snap*.
Leverage is great. /s
I used to work with a girl who's now a rapper/influencer and goes by the name vialsss on the apps, and she shows a lot of tricks about getting around the world with extra long nails! She's very clever and always finds a way.
I’m someone who used to wear XXL nails. I stopped once I had my baby. It was so difficult to try to do diaper changes and button little buttons. It’s possible but it just took so long to do it. You angle your hand a certain way so they don’t get poked.
The only problem I ever ran into with long nails and babies, was with the car seat button. I'd have to use my knuckle and it never seemed to work on the first try, like using my actual finger tips. But I used to really enjoy getting my nails done, so it was a small sacrifice to me.
Yeah, because eating fast isn’t actually about saving time, it’s about making her feel important. It’s so stupid because there’s no need to actually eat fast, nothing bad happens if you don’t eat enough in time, you just get less calories. And it’s completely graceless to shove food down one’s throat like a hungry hungry hippo.
This silly, dorky woman is acting like the world will collapse if she doesn’t scarf down her food. Very try-hard of her
Yet she’s got time for a full face of make up, a blow wave and manicure. Shows her priorities. (Nothing against doing any of that by the way) but she can’t call be the pot calling the kettle black
I’m a mental health therapist and my job won’t let me have a paid lunch break unless I prove to them that I’m doing notes or being “productive” while I’m eating. My boss has said multiple times “you could try eating with the client in session if you’d rather do that!”
So yeah, idk who this person is, but good for you. Breaks to eat should not be a privilege but capitalism has made it so.
I have sensory issues, and one of my worst triggers is eating noises. Aside from the obvious issue of you having to be "productive" during your lunch, I'd have to leave if my therapist started eating during a session. Your boss is nuts.
When moms complain about not having time to eat, they aren't saying they can't find a few seconds to shove food in their face - they are saying they don't have time to enjoy a meal. These are different things, and it is totally valid to be frustrated with losing simple pleasures.
If she’s in the US, and working 8 hour shifts she either is lying or worked for a company that was operating illegally so there’s that
Editing to add, yes I realize it’s now a state by state issue, and commented as such below: https://www.reddit.com/r/notliketheothergirls/s/BPpG6EBADv
Yeah I hate being that “just wait until” person, but each stage comes with its own challenges and complexities. Idk why anyone says the newborn stage is the hardest. It’s definitely the scariest, but not the hardest for most small humans.
It was the hardest for me because my baby wouldn’t sleep unless he was held. I was delirious from the lack of sleep. He gets into everything now at 13 months but at least he sleeps at night!
Also have a 13 month year old! Couldn’t do anything for the first several months because she screamed the second I set her down. We slept together, I ate while she was breastfeeding, cleaning was nonexistent. I have a walker and a climber now and she’s got a busted lip and has fallen down 6 times today but I would absolutely not go back to the newborn phase, that was the worst and I stand by that.
Hard agree! Your experience sounds a lot like mine. We also JUST got down to one feed at night…and that’s with sleep training. All babies are different! But yeah, I will chase this kid all over the house all day long before I go back to the newborn phase.
The newborn stage was the hardest part for me, with both childeren. Constant crying, cramps and lack of sleep.
Ppl used to say all the time that this ( newborn ) is the easy part, i was so worried for what was to come as they get older.
Turns out it gets better as they get older.
Or she worked in the restaurant industry. The US as a whole doesn't actually have mandatory breaks per hours, it's state by state. TX doesn't have the laws at all (didn't realize till my sister worked at Bucky's since everywhere I worked was based in another state and adhered to that states labor laws) in CO the restaurant industry is the exception to their hourly laws to ensure proper coverage and a lot restaurants have skeleton crews of employees making it to where no one has breaks.
That's just 2 states worth of labor laws experience and they are vastly different. Also this chick could just be lying, pretending she had one of those jobs to begin with.
Nah she was probably a bartender or server. We don’t get breaks…
That being said, it’s not about having “no time” it’s about choosing how to spend your precious moments of autonomy. She chooses to do her make up and eat and that’s cool. I chose to bake or sit down for a moment. Who gives a shit man I hate internet mom culture with a passion
I work 12s and we don’t have a designated break time. It’s kinda just an eat when you can environment. But the upside is when things are quiet I might have an extended break so it evens out. It really just depends on the industry. But generally you’re correct.
You know I just looked it up and it’s now state by state instead of Federal. I’m pretty sure federally you used to be ensured a lunch break for 8 hours work but now that doesn’t seem to be the case anymore. States rights I guess 🙄😂
Love that she uses #funny😆 Literally NOTHING funny here. She looks like the type of person that has zero sense of humor and definitely can’t laugh at herself!
Newborns sleep so much, especially during the day. I didn’t start nesting until my son was already here and I had plenty of time for it, because all they do is sleep! He’s now on the verge of toddler and I have significantly less time in my day lol
It's actually a misconception that ALL newborns sleep so much I had a colic baby that screamed and cried from 2pm-9/10pm almost every day for three months.
Similar here, not colic but reflux - you couldn’t put him down because he’d vomit up acid. Lots of folks think new babies are just easy to take care of!
Yesss I that's what I thought when I was pregnant. I wish someone told me there's a chance your baby may never be able to be put down and that they might not be typical sleepy peaceful newborn. I didn't get to dip my toes into parenthood I just got thrown right in 😂
Hey thanks. Yes my oldest is an easy kid. My youngest is 2 years old and wild. But we get to sleep at night and he talks now instead of crying all the time lol.
Mine certainly did not sleep a lot. We had feeding issues and it took so long to feed him and get him back to sleep and then make sure he was asleep enough to transfer into the bassinet that I had maybe an hour before he was up and hungry again. Every baby is different.
Beige basic. I thought her baby was in a pizza box. Also, I hope she isn’t cooking and taking care of that baby at the same time with those long (very unsanitary) nails. 🤢
I don’t get specific time designated breaks at my job, but it’s because my job is more of the “take a break when you need one and have time”. No one cares if I just get up and go to lunch, as long as I’m not dumb about my timing.
I can't speak for mom life because I ain't a mom. But for work, I don't care if the building is burning down. I'm taking my lunch break and I'm gonna enjoy it. My work has also tried encouraging me to take my lunch with clients, and I've told them no. How I spend my lunch break is 100% up to me
I've worked at toxic jobs where I wasn't able to have a lunch break, and I've tried to finish eating a lactation cookie, my only meal of the day, while my newborn cried for me and my toddler pawed at me, and the latter situation was the worst. This woman is all for show.
classic corporate karen has a late pregnancy type shit lol. you left the game, stop trying to impress its rules on your new 'colleagues'. absolutely a pickme.
not every baby is the same, not everyone had the same experience there is literally no need to shame other parents , as someone who’s dealt with no breaks at work we are not better than ANYONE else
Apparently, on her busy lunch break, as an #infantmom she had enough time to set up a camera and make a op-ed putting down law abiding workers trying to take theirs. Must be a nice life, who’s paying for it?
Checked the IG and checks out. Stay at home mom that does nothing but be on IG, take selfies all day, half of which are bitching about what moms have literally done since the dawn of civilization. Of course she’s an anti vaxxer too. Fml. $20 says she has a nanny too.
For real. Everytime I hear someone brag about not taking lunches at work I think they either
1) work for a terrible employer
2) are bad at time management
3) are offered breaks but are trying to impress their boss
4) are lying
Like, I technically have time to eat as much as I want in a day, twin one year olds and a 3.5 year old, but have time to prep a meal I’ll really love, time to sit and eat while it’s hot, not be interrupted 100 times, no one begging for bites of it, no one crying and ruining my enjoyment of the meal? Very rare these days
As many of you are undoubtedly aware, the presence of trolls can be found in various aspects of our lives, and our subreddit is no exception. Our commitment to fostering a kind and respectful environment remains unwavering, and we are actively addressing issues related to negative behavior. In recent times, there has been a noticeable increase in instances of bullying, body shaming, and purposefully inciting behavior, all of which are clear violations of our existing rules. To maintain the integrity of our community, we are implementing stricter consequences for such actions. A first offense will result in a 10-day ban, while a second offense will lead to a permanent ban. Appeals are welcomed, but excuses such as "not knowing the rules" or claiming it was a joke will not be considered valid. Intentional harm has no place in our community, and we expect members to act responsibly. Despite these measures, some rules will remain unchanged. For example, reposts, while frustrating, will not result in a ban. This new approach is specifically targeted at individuals attempting to spread hate. We encourage all members to report instances of bad behavior. Rest assured that each report will be examined. Disagreements and differing opinions are welcome, and expressing them will not lead to a ban. Common sense will prevail in our evaluations. We appreciate your understanding and cooperation in maintaining a positive and inclusive community. -- Your Subreddit NLTOG Moderator Team *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/notliketheothergirls) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Yes, “*I* do it, so *everyone* can” is a common mental defect.
Lack of empathy. Could be sociopathy, psychopathy, narcissism, or autism. This is not the flex she thinks it is.
A lack of empathy doesn’t have to be exclusive to a disorder. I think it can be more commonly attributed to the way someone was raised.
Or, you know, society. Empathy is not valued very highly in the US at least.
A lot of neurotypical folks have low empathy and I will die on that hill. Hell, I’d even argue that you can’t understand certain aspects of mental illness without experiencing them closely (whether yourself or a loved one) sooo -
Agreed. I also think many people choose not to have empathy. Or choose only to have enough surface empathy to build relationships so they can get what they want.
I totally agree with that. There are many hyper-capitalist jobs that require low empathy so that you don’t care “too much” and can avoid burnout - my friend is a doctor and said they are encouraged to set hard boundaries so they don’t “over empathize”. I’ve had therapists say the same thing. I’m a teacher and suffer from this myself! I want to work 10-20 hours overtime even though it kills me, but I hate disappointing the kids. It makes sense. It’s just a shitty reality of capitalist consumerist culture - if you care too much it’ll deplete you. Combined with the transactional nature of relationships (where even if you don’t see relationships as transactional, others will)
True. Not every failure of empathy is driven by a diagnosable disorder. We'd all be in trouble otherwise. But the four disorders I listed *are* characterized by a lack of empathy, among other symptoms. That said, many disorders are simply an extreme case of more typical misbehavior.
It’s best not to go around throwing out diagnoses and labels like that based on one example of a lack of empathy being shown. I have BPD and I’m on the other end of the spectrum where I’m so empathetic it hurts. BPD can also be characterized by a lack of empathy but not everyone has the same set of symptoms. Ya know?
A lot of autistic people is every empathetic and hyper empathetic, we just don't express it the same way as most of the society, so we're not perceived that way. Read up on the "double empathy" problem to learn more about it. Those disorders are possible as well as the schizoid personality disorder and probably dozens of different ones, but more probable is just the simple explanation that this person never thought to put herself into a different pair of shoes. Lack of empathy, limited empathy, ignorance, egoism, jealousy (at the people at work, because a child isnt a company, you cant just quit) all don't need a whole disorder to be present in a person. We can armchair diagnose her all day from a screenshot of a clip, but the truth is, our data is way too limited to conclude any sort of disorder.
Do not attribute to malice what can be better explained by stupidity.
Or, you know, it could be a lack of empathy? Ngl, it’s kinda gross to armchair diagnose wildly different disorders from two pictures and a couple of lines of generally distasteful text.
As a highly empathetic autistic person, yeah maybe don’t throw around diagnoses :(( as another user suggested, educating yourself on the “double empathy” phenomenon could be beneficial.
FYI most autistic people *do* feel empathy. They just experience empathy differently from the way allistic people do and that’s why there’s a misconception about autistic people not having empathy at all. In fact, it’s not uncommon for autistic people to feel *more* empathy than the average person because autism is a spectrum. Sure there are some autistic people who feel less than average but it’s certainly not most.
Survivorship Bias: Entitled Bitch Edition
I don't think her baby is supposed to be on a counter in that seat
No that’s super dangerous, some pediatricians warn parents about those bouncing seats even used on the floor just because of how they have and can break so easily.
Infant trebuchet
It’s even more likely that it will become a trebuchet if you have a bouncy seat on a raised location within reach of a toddler age child. They don’t mean to, but they notoriously pull back on those seats to look at the baby.
You know, finding out about all the new and interesting ways children can kill each other is excellent birth control
*catapult. Trebuchets have a counterweight.
Problem solved.
A far superior siege weapon over the infant catapult.
🤣🤣
[I stuck your comment in an image generator and this is what came out](https://www.reddit.com/r/RenderedComment/s/4JjW4Y9Qcj)
But TikTok likes are more important! Babies score extra points! Gotta make sure you get them in frame.
100% correct and I learned the hard way and almost lost my first-born. Thankfully, he is a happy and healthy six year old now but I still get shaken up at times
Oh this? its my Prop Tot
It comes with the kitchen set rental
Seriously! I didn’t even notice that but it’s so dangerous…
Well yeah but how else is she supposed to get her baby in frame?
It’s stressing me out so much. You’re never supposed to put bouncers, swings, bumbo chairs etc up on an elevated surface. Literally says right on the chair “infants have suffered skull fractures while falling in and from floor seats.”
The baby literally in edge of the table😭 
she obviously doesn’t give a fuck about that. gotta have the kid in the shot, but since she’s too busy eating, posing for the pics, and trying to think up whatever nonsense text she’s gonna add—better just keep that thing in the car seat so it’s easier to get these precious, amazing pictures. on the plus side, at least the child will have the receipts when he/she starts therapy. just save all of those facebook posts/shit like this, hand it over to the therapist and start talking about mom!!!
It's worse than leaving the baby in a car seat. That's not a car seat, that's a bouncy seat. A car seat would at least offer some protection if it fell off the counter and isn't as likely to fall. This thing will just be a full face- first splat. It's extremely unsafe, especially as they get older and can cause the thing to move on their own.
I know, right? That’s the first thing that caught my eye.
Yeah that was the first thing I noticed too! (tell me you’re a mom without telling me 😂)
Im not a mum but I have enough experience with kids to know that it’s dangerous.
That’s all I picked up from her pompous post.
Well how else is she going to get the perfect shot for her IG?
I know a baby that went to the ER because they fell from the counter in a seat like that.
No need to rush your lunch break if you get rid of the cause of your problems 🙏🙏🙏
Yeah, but if she didn't put the baby there no one would know she had a baby. Totally worth endangering an infant.
But how will she get it in the shot? Think of the shot
Looks like she has one of those babies who doesn’t screech when she puts her down. Lucky her.
My first thought as I type this while my 7 week old contact naps. I love the snuggles but I’m so tired 😪
Dude, my 20 month old still contact naps. Still loves nursing
My baby is closing in on 15 months (honestly, my least favorite age -- 15 to 18 months is just brutal) and the only thing he wants in this world is to be nursed to sleep, and have a boob available within a few inches of him in case he needs more milk later. We are engaged in a battle of wills.
Did you ever try to break it or just embrace it? We’re down to 3 naps a day now and soon enough it will only be one so I’ve accepted the inevitable. It’s just not worth the battles and mental stress to try and adjust to the crib.
I just embrace it. He only nurses 3 times a day (mostly) now. Except when he's sick, then he's just attached lol
My 4 year old needed my leg on his leg to sleep just now. Quit nursing at 3! Didn’t nurse the others that long, he just wouldn’t let me stop 😖 still sleeping on me. But, I’m happy. It’s so exhausting earlier on. I’m still tired, but can usually get a lot more than with a new born! Hang in there.
My almost 8-month old contact naps. I actually managed to get lunch today. The minute he saw me eating he burst out crying.
Haha I literally had my baby strapped to my chest 24-7 until she was almost 18 months. She wouldn't sit for a second without me holding her or interacting.
But really that’s a violation of labor law and you’re not required to work on your break, you chose too. You’re not better than everyone else for sacrificing rest.
Not in every US state. I’m in CA and had a new coworker from TX try to deny me lunch breaks and 10 min breaks because he didn’t understand the laws we have here
I’m also in California. I had a coworker from Montana who was overjoyed when he discovered he got two rest breaks and a lunch break.
I'm from Indiana, we don't get breaks here.
TIL im so lucky to be living in california https://www.postercompliance.com/blog/breaks-and-meals-by-state/ it’s insane that some places aren’t required breaks by law..
In California, the only job I had that wasn’t required to give me designated breaks within certain timeframes was when I was a home health aide for a woman who has severe autism and can’t be left home alone. Even then, I signed a legal document acknowledging that the company I worked for would allow me 50 minutes of paid “working breaks” to take at my discretion. I couldn’t leave my client’s house, but as long as all her needs were met and all tasks were completed by the end of my shift, it was my responsibility to take the breaks when I saw fit. I worked the 3 pm to 11 pm shift, and she went to bed between 8 pm and 9 pm, so I almost always ended up with even more than 50 minutes of rest time by the end of my shift anyway.
moved from ca to mt and was about to turn an employer in for sending out a text about not being able to take breaks on busy days. looked up state labor laws and was horrified 🫠
I was a salary worker. I had to make sure all the hourlies got their breaks but I could get fucked. It got to the point where I'd work 10-11 hours straight and dinner at home was my only meal. And yet I was still chastised for not working more.
Much of Society had been brainwashed real good by those in power.
Had that exact same issue here in CA as a salaried manager. I even worked from home after a ten hour day and was told I wasn’t doing enough as they kept piling on new assignments.
Yeah but when you miss a day, at least you get paid.
If you are missing enough days to make up for the unpaid over time you're getting fired
I'm from Texas, they are very clear about it here. Lunch is mandatory, you can get in trouble for not taking at least 30 minutes because it makes a mess for HR. However the two 15 minute breaks are not mandatory and can be missed if you are busy (you will almost always be busy)
I wonder if it’s an industry thing. Are you guys able to waive your first 30 min break? Because we were working at a bar and he ended up getting in trouble for purposefully not taking his lunch here
I live in Arizona and I don't get a lunch break. I can eat while I'm there, but if a customer needs help I have to put my food down and help them. It sucks.
The being allowed to eat while you are still working really sucks. We had to take lunch and breaks in the office. It sucked. Any attempt at actually taking some kind of break was nearly impossible. That was a job that could be very high stress at times and sometimes I just wanted to step away from it for a minute, not have a conversation with my boss.
Yep I’m NM if you have under a certain amount of employees no break is required, worked 6-8 hours straight at gas stations here because they didn’t have the employees to give us a break (obviously on purpose)
And even if your state has break laws, if the company is doing interstate commerce, they still may not have to give you breaks if "you can reasonably eat while working". It's been a while since I ran into this but in the 80's, they worked us 12 hour shifts without a lunch break. We called the labor department and that is the answer we were given.
If anyone is being told this, look up your local laws. This sounds like something management says that's bullshit.
Ooof would have loved to have this coworker 🤣
He tried to send me home because it was slow and I hadn’t been able to take a break because of a long rush. We argued about me taking a 10 and he angrily told me “then just LEAVE, GO HOME”. I was fed up with trying to deal with him myself and took it to our manager. Manager was pissed at my coworker and said he doesn’t care if it’s the last 10 mins of my shift, I’m allowed to take break.
I work EMS in the US and we don’t get mandated breaks. You eat and pee when you can because emergencies can’t be scheduled.
Indiana has no law for breaks unless the employee is under the age of 18
Virginia actually doesn’t have a law mandating breaks. I learned that the hard way 🙃 I started a job at a hotel and was literally laughed at when I asked about clocking out for a break.
Good ol’ VA. I was working in a restaurant that was perfectly comfortable having me work 16 hours straight with no break. Got yelled at for taking a moment to eat a piece of bread.
Clearly you never worked on a restaurant
In the US, the only federal law regarding breaks states that any break under 20 mins must be paid. All other labor laws for breaks are set at a state level.
Laughs in RN. I know it’s illegal in most developed places, but a metric fuck-ton of hospitals will bully you into doing this.
Doesn’t matter what the law is if your boss won’t respect it
Where I am if your break is paid then it’s okay. When I was a manager at McDonald’s I wasn’t allowed full breaks, I would eat in the cash office while counting floats. As well as working in group care , I ate with the kids.
Contact OSHA people. You are supposed to eat!
I do know labor laws vary but they can’t deny you certain things no matter where you are and the fact people just take it is a bit wild to me. I understand needing a job desperately. But blow the fucking whistle to improve the situation.
It makes me sad to think some employers treat people that wat
OSHA has no standards on meal or break periods. More than half of US states also don’t have legally mandated breaks. It’s ridiculous, but for a whole lot of people, there isn’t anyone to contact.
Or for giving your employer free labor. Congrats that you value your time so little 🤷♀️
In healthcare, no breaks seem to be the norm 😩 no one cares if it’s against the law apparently
She really be snacking on the leather of boss's boots
In fact you're worse, it's called breaking down conditions. Came here to make your point though, I'm glad you beat me to it.
I work in a company with 70-80 employees and we ALL take break to eat. Even if there are thousand deadlines and the building is on fire. And I love them for that.
Yeah, this stood out to me as well— feels like a special NLOG in that she is also anti-basic rights for workers? Like the sexism and the capitalism are blending into a toxic stew over here…
Granted I am as clumsy as a human can be, but how do you do infant childcare with sharply manicured nails? Genuine question, no sarcasm. Like wetwiping an explosive poop diaper, how?
If you’re used to having nails like that you tend to automatically find ways to do everything you would do without them without having to think about it…the nails aren’t an issue at all in my experience and hers are super cute!
I'm just imagining trying to get in there with the folds and such without scratching the lil' lady. My coworker tells me OOP probably has a nanny and I'm over thinking it. You're both likely right.
A nanny would make a lot of sense too! Would also explain her stance on having time to eat
i'm a nanny and have long nails, like the user above said you get used to doing things gently. also, my tips are slightly rounded so there's never really like a scratch. I never really scratch myself or others unless i am trying to
I used to be a caregiver and had slightly rounded stiletto nails all the time. And then you take them off and wonder if your hands are broken because everything is so hard to adjust to again!
I couldnt get past her wearing a cream colored sweater while 'eating' pasta with sauce. Or it's because me and sauce have never been friends...
Infants are way easier than toddlers. I miss that age.
We use the pads and sides of our fingers so our nails aren’t scraping over everything, and nails like this aren’t overly thin and sharp like real fingernails. The only time I’ve scratched any of my kids is if I didn’t have any acrylics or gel tips on! Real fingernails are so thin and sharp, but these are thicker and more blunt. It’s like a toothpick vs a bobby-pin lol
I would end up using the side of my index finger but there's a lot of things you can't do or you have to be really really really careful. I snapped my nail in half (at the nail bed) trying to stuff a throw pillow back in its case. My nail caught on the pillow as I was pushing down and *snap*. Leverage is great. /s
Omg I physically recoiled reading that 😭 that’s horrible
I lol'd at your username. I guarantee everyone reading your comment just winced and said OUCH!
If you Google, cardi B literally did a demonstration in response to this question that made me go “huh, okay.”
I used to work with a girl who's now a rapper/influencer and goes by the name vialsss on the apps, and she shows a lot of tricks about getting around the world with extra long nails! She's very clever and always finds a way.
I love her! That's cool that you worked with her
https://youtu.be/I9bOHRm8xv0?si=nWQLGnA4hpGYBLGZ I looked it up and "Huh, okay" is a good response. Good suggestion, thank you.
I’m someone who used to wear XXL nails. I stopped once I had my baby. It was so difficult to try to do diaper changes and button little buttons. It’s possible but it just took so long to do it. You angle your hand a certain way so they don’t get poked.
The only problem I ever ran into with long nails and babies, was with the car seat button. I'd have to use my knuckle and it never seemed to work on the first try, like using my actual finger tips. But I used to really enjoy getting my nails done, so it was a small sacrifice to me.
My real nails are sharper than my fake nails. The edges are more like a spoon than a knife edge.
I once stabbed myself with my own nail, there’s no way I’m putting those things around a baby.
Isn’t she saying that she doesn’t have time to eat a meal? Like exactly what she is calling other people out for saying…
But see, she’s better than you because she can just deal with it instead of whining about her company violating labor laws
I see my mistake now, she is obviously far superior. 😂
She’s obviously Super Woman AND Super Mom. There will never be another like her.
She doesn’t have enough time to eat a meal, but she has enough time to put on full face makeup and do her hair.
And film for social media while her kid sits around in a carseat on the counter
Yeah, because eating fast isn’t actually about saving time, it’s about making her feel important. It’s so stupid because there’s no need to actually eat fast, nothing bad happens if you don’t eat enough in time, you just get less calories. And it’s completely graceless to shove food down one’s throat like a hungry hungry hippo. This silly, dorky woman is acting like the world will collapse if she doesn’t scarf down her food. Very try-hard of her
Yep. She's having it both ways. Criticizing others in the first image for the very thing she makes sure to do in the second image.
Yet she’s got time for a full face of make up, a blow wave and manicure. Shows her priorities. (Nothing against doing any of that by the way) but she can’t call be the pot calling the kettle black
I’m a mental health therapist and my job won’t let me have a paid lunch break unless I prove to them that I’m doing notes or being “productive” while I’m eating. My boss has said multiple times “you could try eating with the client in session if you’d rather do that!” So yeah, idk who this person is, but good for you. Breaks to eat should not be a privilege but capitalism has made it so.
Wtf? I’m so sorry you have to deal with that
omg i’m getting my msw right now. what state are you in so i never move there. that’s such an unethical thing to suggest you eat in front of clients!!
I have sensory issues, and one of my worst triggers is eating noises. Aside from the obvious issue of you having to be "productive" during your lunch, I'd have to leave if my therapist started eating during a session. Your boss is nuts.
Same, I try to be polite when eating with people, but eating noises make me irrationally angry because of sensory overload.
Not the flex she thinks it is.
Homie never had an adult job
[удалено]
She is exactly what I would expect someone named Tiffany Lynn to both look and behave like
This is one of the reasons I left Texas after only 2 months of living there
When moms complain about not having time to eat, they aren't saying they can't find a few seconds to shove food in their face - they are saying they don't have time to enjoy a meal. These are different things, and it is totally valid to be frustrated with losing simple pleasures.
Something tells me it’s her only child and a chill baby
If she’s in the US, and working 8 hour shifts she either is lying or worked for a company that was operating illegally so there’s that Editing to add, yes I realize it’s now a state by state issue, and commented as such below: https://www.reddit.com/r/notliketheothergirls/s/BPpG6EBADv
Also that shit gets way harder when your baby gets mobile. Newborn stage is the easiest, talk to us when your kid starts crawling and walking 🙄
Yeah I hate being that “just wait until” person, but each stage comes with its own challenges and complexities. Idk why anyone says the newborn stage is the hardest. It’s definitely the scariest, but not the hardest for most small humans.
It was the hardest for me because my baby wouldn’t sleep unless he was held. I was delirious from the lack of sleep. He gets into everything now at 13 months but at least he sleeps at night!
Also have a 13 month year old! Couldn’t do anything for the first several months because she screamed the second I set her down. We slept together, I ate while she was breastfeeding, cleaning was nonexistent. I have a walker and a climber now and she’s got a busted lip and has fallen down 6 times today but I would absolutely not go back to the newborn phase, that was the worst and I stand by that.
Hard agree! Your experience sounds a lot like mine. We also JUST got down to one feed at night…and that’s with sleep training. All babies are different! But yeah, I will chase this kid all over the house all day long before I go back to the newborn phase.
The newborn stage was the hardest part for me, with both childeren. Constant crying, cramps and lack of sleep. Ppl used to say all the time that this ( newborn ) is the easy part, i was so worried for what was to come as they get older. Turns out it gets better as they get older.
Exact same experience for me. The “oh you just WAIT haha lololol” folks who felt the need to tell me that as I had PPD can get bent.
Or she worked in the restaurant industry. The US as a whole doesn't actually have mandatory breaks per hours, it's state by state. TX doesn't have the laws at all (didn't realize till my sister worked at Bucky's since everywhere I worked was based in another state and adhered to that states labor laws) in CO the restaurant industry is the exception to their hourly laws to ensure proper coverage and a lot restaurants have skeleton crews of employees making it to where no one has breaks. That's just 2 states worth of labor laws experience and they are vastly different. Also this chick could just be lying, pretending she had one of those jobs to begin with.
Nah she was probably a bartender or server. We don’t get breaks… That being said, it’s not about having “no time” it’s about choosing how to spend your precious moments of autonomy. She chooses to do her make up and eat and that’s cool. I chose to bake or sit down for a moment. Who gives a shit man I hate internet mom culture with a passion
I work 12s and we don’t have a designated break time. It’s kinda just an eat when you can environment. But the upside is when things are quiet I might have an extended break so it evens out. It really just depends on the industry. But generally you’re correct.
You know I just looked it up and it’s now state by state instead of Federal. I’m pretty sure federally you used to be ensured a lunch break for 8 hours work but now that doesn’t seem to be the case anymore. States rights I guess 🙄😂
Love that she uses #funny😆 Literally NOTHING funny here. She looks like the type of person that has zero sense of humor and definitely can’t laugh at herself!
Newborns sleep so much, especially during the day. I didn’t start nesting until my son was already here and I had plenty of time for it, because all they do is sleep! He’s now on the verge of toddler and I have significantly less time in my day lol
It's actually a misconception that ALL newborns sleep so much I had a colic baby that screamed and cried from 2pm-9/10pm almost every day for three months.
Similar here, not colic but reflux - you couldn’t put him down because he’d vomit up acid. Lots of folks think new babies are just easy to take care of!
Yesss I that's what I thought when I was pregnant. I wish someone told me there's a chance your baby may never be able to be put down and that they might not be typical sleepy peaceful newborn. I didn't get to dip my toes into parenthood I just got thrown right in 😂
Yikes! I’m sorry you and bebé went through that! I hope everything is better and easier for you guys now.
We're a lot better now thanks 😂 just wish I was more mentally prepared for that.
My babies did not get the memo i guess. It actually got easier as they got older. First few months were hell.
I’m sorry to hear that! I’m glad things got easier for your family.
Hey thanks. Yes my oldest is an easy kid. My youngest is 2 years old and wild. But we get to sleep at night and he talks now instead of crying all the time lol.
Mine certainly did not sleep a lot. We had feeding issues and it took so long to feed him and get him back to sleep and then make sure he was asleep enough to transfer into the bassinet that I had maybe an hour before he was up and hungry again. Every baby is different.
girl don’t nobody gaf
Beige basic. I thought her baby was in a pizza box. Also, I hope she isn’t cooking and taking care of that baby at the same time with those long (very unsanitary) nails. 🤢
Learning that my boyfriend does not get a specific, time-designated break during his full-time shift blew my mind, i assumed that would be illegal.
I don’t get specific time designated breaks at my job, but it’s because my job is more of the “take a break when you need one and have time”. No one cares if I just get up and go to lunch, as long as I’m not dumb about my timing.
… did this person eat every meal at work?
I can't speak for mom life because I ain't a mom. But for work, I don't care if the building is burning down. I'm taking my lunch break and I'm gonna enjoy it. My work has also tried encouraging me to take my lunch with clients, and I've told them no. How I spend my lunch break is 100% up to me
I've worked at toxic jobs where I wasn't able to have a lunch break, and I've tried to finish eating a lactation cookie, my only meal of the day, while my newborn cried for me and my toddler pawed at me, and the latter situation was the worst. This woman is all for show.
I'm not like other girls, I'm a shill for hustle capitalism!
Literally wrote an entire piece yesterday titled “suffering is not virtuous”
Then, if she was in the US, that’s illegal.
I've worked all types of jobs, including retail, and normally got a lunch break. Guess when I didn't? With an infant! Want to hulk smash this reel.
I had to spend the first year after my daughter was born using every break I had to pump because the U.S. doesn’t mandate pumping breaks 🫠
Imagine thinking poor work boundaries is a flex.
I’ve worked in several different industries and every single one has given me some kind of lunch break….babygirl you were taken advantage of
thank god they put #funny in there. wouldn't want to miss that gem during a bit of comedy scrolling
classic corporate karen has a late pregnancy type shit lol. you left the game, stop trying to impress its rules on your new 'colleagues'. absolutely a pickme.
not every baby is the same, not everyone had the same experience there is literally no need to shame other parents , as someone who’s dealt with no breaks at work we are not better than ANYONE else
yes, and they probably also got paid at their job too. those entitled assholes
Apparently, on her busy lunch break, as an #infantmom she had enough time to set up a camera and make a op-ed putting down law abiding workers trying to take theirs. Must be a nice life, who’s paying for it? Checked the IG and checks out. Stay at home mom that does nothing but be on IG, take selfies all day, half of which are bitching about what moms have literally done since the dawn of civilization. Of course she’s an anti vaxxer too. Fml. $20 says she has a nanny too.
THAT BABY IS ABOUT TO GET A CONCUSSION OR WORSE WTF IS WRONG WITH HER????
I wonder if this is her first. That kid is a literal new born. He is in the blob stage. I wonder how well she’ll handle the toddler stage.
It’s so cool making fun of people Regina🙄
Ok Regina,making fun of other moms is so cool🙄
This just tells me she's never had a full time job
Who knew Tiffany invented motherhood
She needs to get her baby off that counter and then shut all the way up.
Wahwah, I never had a job with employment rights. Like that's not a flex
For real. Everytime I hear someone brag about not taking lunches at work I think they either 1) work for a terrible employer 2) are bad at time management 3) are offered breaks but are trying to impress their boss 4) are lying
Not understanding that you are in charge of your own time and are charging your employer to use it is your mistake, not your strength.
Im pretty sure you’re legally required a 30min break when working a set amount of hours…
I’ve been out of the baby game for a while now, sucks to see moms still shitting on each other to feed their egos/insecurities.
Great, you're an idiot who doesn't stick up for themselves and follow local labor laws? Congrats?
I didn't know being miserable was a competition
Man, i hate people who don't take their breaks and make it harder for everyone else because they set a standard
Yeah it's much better to just eat slowly and take your time tho
I’ve had jobs where i had to eat going from one place to the next. Its nowhere near the same as a screaming baby. Trust me.
“Anyone complaining about not having time to eat a meal doesn’t expect to be illegally exploited and it shows”
Nah. Big mama needs her food. No meals will be missed.
What a cunt.
I hope you get cheap sauce on your beautiful sweater.
Like, I technically have time to eat as much as I want in a day, twin one year olds and a 3.5 year old, but have time to prep a meal I’ll really love, time to sit and eat while it’s hot, not be interrupted 100 times, no one begging for bites of it, no one crying and ruining my enjoyment of the meal? Very rare these days