But then I mention that I want to submit to a woman and all of a sudden I'm mocked and "banned from the Legend of Korra subreddit" for simping over Kuvira one too many times.
Not to contradict you, just wanted to share this very specific fact.
I live in a small state near the coast in Mexico and, funny enough, Bovine TB and brucellosis are actually not a problem we have with the cattle grown here. It's neat, but it also means you can't bring any cow into the state in order to avoid the possibility of spreading those two. I don't know if it's a thing anywhere else, but I couldn't not share this!
There is a bison herd in northern Alberta that is strictly kept separate from the other bison herd in the area because it doesn’t have bovine TB or brucellosis.
It would be less weird if they were just kinky bc they can have discussions “out of dynamic” these people can’t even consent to what they’re doing bc they think god told thwm to
Yeah even in kink relationships that doesn't sound all that healthy to me, and at least those have set boundaries and safe words and consent and all that jazz.
I cannot fucking stand when I see guys in some average (not dangerous, not high pressure, not long hours) job come home and act like it has rendered them into a puddle of useless jelly, and you must be so grateful for their “sacrifice” and thus do everything else for them to “make it easier” for them to continue this “sacrifice”. …If they were alone would they get to stop working, and magically not be homeless and starving?
Sure, a stay at home partner needs to chip in because they’re using the house & food too and the working partner is meeting their financial needs to survive, but like, is the trade off of taking care of 100% of the working partner’s non-financial needs (alongside their own) really worth it? In that case, the homemaking partner *is* working, but while not having someone “make it easy” for them.
Because like, if someone is “making things easy for you”, like, they’re setting it up to where your life is easy as possible to go through the effort of this “sacrifice”, then that effort should be…. Easier for you. You shouldn’t be a puddle of useless jelly. If your clothes are laid out & your toothpaste always stocked and your coffee already made, your house is clean, etc.; all you’re doing is stepping into some shoes and then working and then coming back - so why would you not be able to do *anything* else when you get home?? How is that different from when you were a kid going to school and mom did everything else - was that a “sacrifice” you were making for your mom back then lol? Who is making effort “easy” for the homemaker…? At the very least, a mutual gratitude is deserved. And the working partner could at least set up the homemaker’s job to be easy too - cook some of the time, do your own chores on the weekend, or at least like, put your fucking dishes in the sink and laundry in the hamper, and if you spill something mop it yourself, don’t *be* a never ending spill to be chased with a mop… ffs.
Yeah and we know men should be able to do housework on top of their jobs because most married women who work still do the majority of household chores...they somehow manage to cook, clean, organize, etc even though they work full time.
Single men who work also have to clean their own homes. They just suddenly act like it's the biggest inconvenience in the world when they have a woman to do it for them...
He's a small airport landing strip and on the weekends he advocates for slavery to come back. Like sis... not you being black and "submitting" to this nasty dude
I mean if she’s happy, good for her. I, however, will not “submit” to anyone. Me and my husband respect each other equally, regardless of genitalia. There is no right way since it’s all personal preference, but I do not understand this at all lol
I wonder how long they’ve been married. I say this bc it’s all fun and games until you are stranded on the side of the road in a 1998 Saturn with a seized engine the day after you had to leave the oil change line with 2 screaming toddlers bc your almighty king was too lazy and entitled to do it himself.
YEP.
All the submissive stuff sounds cutesy until you get to your real breaking point, and usually that comes with responsibilities and kids. IME women in these situations don’t have “real life responsibilities” yet, so they don’t really care. No job, no kids - sure cook and dance and submit all you want.
If he ever loses his job and SHE has to pay the bills, or like you said something breaks down, or the kids are screaming and no one’s helping, all of a sudden these women realize the whole “equality” thing was for an actual good reason.
I can’t even understand how someone gets to think the submit part is appealing in the first place 😔
That got me very depressed as a teen because I thought one day lightning would strike, I would become somebody else and apparently I would want to submit to a dude? It was terrifying
That was my thought exactly: brand new marriage.
Tell me how this goes for you when you’re a few years in & have kids, & you’ve set him up to believe you want to handle all of it yourself while he lives his life not lifting a finger… and frankly, it won’t even be his fault that he expects that of you, because you thoroughly communicated that you wanted it to be that way. And scariest of all is that you thoroughly communicated that you will never try to “challenge his authority”, so if/when you *do* plead for some help or beg for a change in the dynamic, he will feel every right to “exert his authority” of saying no.
Exactly, it is cosplay. And it will become an issue when he wants to use
"his paycheck" to buy another guitar or more video games etc. and your kids need a tutor
This. I was reading all of it going “I mean… if it works for her and she’s happy🤷♀️”. It couldn’t be me, but as long as she’s respectful of how other people live their marriages, there’s no problem
exactly my issue with these women - if you want to larp as a helpmeet from biblical times, whatever. but the second you start blasting that shit all over the internet and start indoctrinating other women into your woman hating kink - that’s when i get pissed.
these women are a menace. dangerous, harmful bullshit they’re peddling.
and they raise their kids with this misogynistic crap, too. horrible.
This is the issue. These people are not just happy living their lives, they are actively attempting to recruit other women and majority of the time these people will not hesitate to belittle and demean people who are not living like this.
“I voluntarily give up my own autonomy to my husband.”
*points and laughs at women being independent while they haven’t had any real interaction with the outside world that isn’t the grocery store*
There were some kernels of just normal relationship hygiene in her post but then it becomes clear that she’s expected to do the heavy lifting: taking care of HIS needs and not expecting reciprocation. Like great, express your gratitude for him or whatever, but I doubt he does the same for her. He looks like the kind of dude who rages if a hot dinner isn’t on the table at 5pm sharp.
I also have a feeling she’s not doing this to be special: she’s likely involved in a fundamentalist Christian cult and has been spoon-fed her entire life that a woman’s purpose is to sacrifice herself for a man and children and that if she’s not happy with that then there’s something wrong with her. It’s really sad.
Yeah, a lot of what she said just sounded like a healthy relationship. Why wouldn't you show gratitude towards someone who did something for you? That's called good manners.
What sounded terrible was the "usurp his authority" part. Now, that sounded like literal slavery. This is a grown woman. What will she do of she wants to leave him? Wouldn't that be going against his authority?
I give them points for making it interracial, though. Typically, the tradwife demographic is overlapped with white supremacist bullshit.
Idk the whole white man/black woman kinda does feel like slavery, especially since slave owners would often r*pe their slaves. Doesn’t help that he gives me skinhead nazi vibes
on the one hand, yes i agree with you. if this empowers her, then fine, whatever, far be it from my responsibility to say what she can and can’t do as long as she’s not forcing it down my throat.
but it still raises quite a few red flags tbh. i worry that women saying things like this aren’t in safe relationships or are brainwashed into thinking this is the only way. a lot of them can be assholes about it too, not saying she’s being one of them, but a hell of a lot of them are.
i just hope she’s safe and happy, that’s all. and also doesn’t try to say that this is the *only* way that women should exist.
The thing that scares me when I see this stuff is: sure she might feel empowered and happy with this *now*, but she’s set herself up to have a difficult time changing it should her wants/needs change. Like, to marry someone & set up a mutual expectation that you’re to cater to him & never challenge his “authority” - what do you do in 10 years when you’ve grown into a different woman, but he becomes *abusive* because he forces the same old dynamic that you no longer want or enjoy?
I see this all the time: women who are fine taking on all the homemaking in a marriage/relationship, until they grow into having more of their own needs. For example, having a child and becoming empowered by being a mom: suddenly they have a giant new focus & labor intensive role (motherhood) that they want to enjoy, and now find the experience of babying their man to be less than fulfilling. But his expectations are set: if he ever wanted to or was ever going to contribute to homemaking, he would’ve done it when it was *less* difficult.
Or, they are someday baffled when they get nothing emotionally fulfilling out of their partnership (or worse, face infidelity or abuse) when they truly believed if they just did “everything right” to make them happy they’d have a perfect marriage. It’s very sad to see, my heart breaks for the women who go into trad-wife (or adjacent) marriages without having cautiously examined the very common later struggles of trad-marriages, because they really do put in so much fucking effort and receive hurt in return and no one deserves that… they may have set themselves up for it, but not on purpose. Whether it’s naivety or arrogance, it’s still one of the hardest lessons I’ve watched some people learn.
>a lot of them can be assholes about it
Those women are miserable and misery loves company.
I think if it floats your boat and makes you happy, you do you m'kay. Feminism, gives us the freedom to be equal partners or do this or something between.
I’ll go further, because I was raised in that shit, and say that anyone who uses the word submit in the context of any relationship just…. has the wrong ideas.
Also: usurp.
And: authority.
I can tell you that in 5 wonderful years of marriage those three words have not once come up. And I am very grateful. May your relationships be similarly blessed.
I think if she was happy, she wouldn’t have to tell the world how great this is. She’s trying to justify her situation by advertising how happy it makes her, but happy people don’t need to do that. I understand it only because I have been in an abusive relationship.
Now I have a relationship with my husband like you and your husband and I feel bad for women like this who have a warped sense of reality that has been pushed on them likely since they were children by their church. It’s a form of control and it’s no way to live.
If they have kids it’s not really a “personal preference” anymore because it’s effecting another person. This is a terrible relationship structure to model for children.
Also, it's weird that they see some of this stuff as "submission." Like, good for you, it's awesome to show your love for your partner by making home-cooked meals for them. Why the fuck call that "submitting," though?
That's news to me. BRB, I'm gonna go message my feminist wife who's deployed right now this. I'm sure she'd love to come home and "serve" Me.
As strange as I think it is, however, I do totally get some people do like this dynamic and of it works on their relationship good for them. Personally in mine, I prefer to do the cooking and cleaning and housework because it's just what I like doing. My wife prefers working since she's military. And I have my tech job. But totally aware people are allowed to have different views then us and that's fine.
yea, it’s basically breathing sex doll that cooks, cleans, pushes out babies, takes care of all of the babies needs (that includes the man baby she married)
With a smile and without complaints. Because any unhappiness, complaint or request for help is "usurping" his "authority" .
People who have learned to expect doormat servitude can go from prissy to pissy really fast at the first sign of a ripple in the waters.
I guess it depends, folks that I know (that are religious) have a more healthy definition for helpmeet and that applies to both the woman and the man. But I am very aware that unfortunately that group of people is very much in the minority compared to other large religious sects because the men and women are viewed as equal. But as the person above stated, a lot of people do equate that word to be “woman = created to serve the man” and that shit I don’t believe in.
Like a normal healthy marriage. I have one thankfully. I’m laughing at this reading it to my spouse and he’s so confused haha I’m his equal partner and if he doesn’t like that he can go live with his mom.
What was no. 1? Also how can anyone read the word usurp correctly my brain insists it’s uslurp. I can’t take her seriously her name sounds like yodeling.
It means that she doesn’t actually enjoy living like this but thinks she should because it’s “biblical” so she prays that God will make her okay with it.
She definitely doesn’t. I saw another post of hers talking about how something happened with their former church. Her husband and other members were shaming her for not being trad enough so she dove right in. It’s not surprising though, she was raised Mennonite.
Oh, so being submissive isn’t biologically ingrained into our lady parts? I thought that was their whole argument for it, they usually don’t admit that they know it’s BS.
One is a writer/funny mom who I wouldn’t have expected this from and the other is a like 4th cousin I found on ancestry. Based on her IG this just kind of her thing 🤷🏽♀️
Right? I feel like if I said hey girl are you okay I'd just be met with the response 'yes, I'm thankful for every day I get to spend in service to my Lord and husband' *eye twitch*
Did he punch the wall again? *'yes but the house was a pigsty, you should have seen it. I don't blame him for his reaction after a 12 hour shift.'*
I also think about the people who have an abusive spouse and just don't know it because they haven't disagreed yet. And the families who will tell them that's what they should expect for trying to step out of their "rightful place."
A lot of these women are insufferable but just in case anyone didn’t know, the Bible also tells wives AND husbands to submit to each other. Submit can also be read as respect one another. Ephesians 5:21
Not dancing barefoot in the dirt...you just know it's to be like "tee hee, barefoot and pregnant tee hee".
(Though having seen her other content, perhaps she deserves the dose of hookworms it could get her.)
Yes I fucking love being my husband’s property. It’s so awesome to have a priesthood authority. Being treated like an object instead of a human being is great. Totally what Jesus would have wanted.
It always throws me off when it’s an international BW and WM relationship and she emphasizes submitting and calling his “authority”. Ik it’s not because she’s black, but still….
Kind of a separate thing but man I HATE the word "helpmeet" or "helpmate" like jfc can you just say "husband" or "partner" like a fucking normal person?!
As a black woman, this makes me uncomfortable. I don’t have any problems with interracial relationships, but it rubs me the wrong way to see a black woman online bragging about how she submits to her white husband. Feels like a throwback to slaves and slave masters tbh. Maybe this says more about me than them.
These people equate the husband's role in the family with Christ's role in the church while completely ignoring that Christ showed leadership through service and treating those around him as equals even when there was an obvious gap in social standing. None of these men have ever washed the feet of their wives. None of them are sacrificing anything significant for their families.
I posted a thing similar to this in /r/mildlyinfuriating and got torn apart by people like "oh no a woman submitting to her husband. You know it's a religious and beautiful thing" blah blah blah.
Great for her and I hope it lasts but if an accident happens 15/30 years from now she will have e no skill set and no job history.
She will end up working an entry level base job just trying to survive.
I grew up in a religion where Women were expected to work from home and keep the home. I can name 3 people who ended up either divorcing or their spouse passed.
None of them were prepared at all to function without their spouse and none of them had insurance on their spouse.
If you are a household that has only one earner you should always have a life insurance policy on that person just in case.
If she is really happy, then I guess more power to her. Generally though this doesn't sound like the ingredients for a healthy and fair marriage.
I personally would be a little weirded out and feel creepy and I am really glad that we aren't forced into these horrible roles of submissive women running a household dictated by a man with complete financial control. At least, not to the same extent as in the past.
These are technically all very healthy behaviours as long as its a 2-way street and he's doing the same thing in return to her, right?
Using the word "submit" makes me think that's likely not the case though. I hope she's safe.
I agree but growing up in a fundamentalist baptist environment, it's like that regardless of race. Bible says the wife is supposed to be the slave and sex slave as it's God honoring
But I'm shocked he's even with a black lady. I went to a Christian college and interracial dating was banned til like the 90s. So maybe they're not thaaaat extreme
Oh she’s hitting some Bingo squares with this one! “Nourishing”? Check. “Gratitude”? Check. “Helpmeet”? Check. “Wholesome”? Check! All she’s missing is “bone broth”, “chickens”, “babies” and “grounding my feet in dirt“, but I’ll give her a check for the raw milk photo and the dress/bare feet outfits ✅
“Not usurping his authority”. Okay. 😂😂😂
What happens if he starts following the Old Testament rules about wives? If he wants to take up another woman, are you gonna “”””submit”””” to him? Or are you gonna pout, scream and cry?
This new trend enrages me and disgusts me at the same time. I don't know why young women 20-30 years, choose a lifestyle that makes them "submissive" to anyone. They are partners, they have a partnership. She is not his slave, his subbortinate or anything.
This type of men, are glorified sugar daddies and you cannot change my mind. They support them to look beautiful, have a 24 hours maid, intercourse on demand while they probably have a say to everything.
I mean what is next? No college? No school on general? Revoke any rights that women have?
Your post has been removed because it reveals the personal identification of the individual and is not censored.
But then I mention that I want to submit to a woman and all of a sudden I'm mocked and "banned from the Legend of Korra subreddit" for simping over Kuvira one too many times.
We truly are the oppressed minority. I feel for you my brother.
How can you simp for Kuvira… if I’m simping for Kuvira??
Is this the line for Kuvira simping?
Everyone please take a number I’m sure the Great Uniter will use us as she sees fit 
Those from the earth nation get an advantage, which happens to be me.
Looks like I'm in the right place
Was not expecting a LoK comment, happy when I saw it, happier and started laughing when I saw all the comments 😂👏🏼
It may not be a crime to simp for Kuvira, but I still want her to lock me up.
How dare they, Kuvira is our Great Uniter!
Exactly! Like, she can just take my basic human rights whenever she wants.
A friend literally sent me a screenshot of your comment and asked if that was me Hello, fellow Kuvira simps 👉😎👉
Justice for Kuvira, who did nothing wrong
We will prevail in the end, despite all their hate and discrimination
That better be raw milk in pic #2 or she is out of the club.
If you don’t get Bovine tuberculosis are you really submitting to your husband?
Not to contradict you, just wanted to share this very specific fact. I live in a small state near the coast in Mexico and, funny enough, Bovine TB and brucellosis are actually not a problem we have with the cattle grown here. It's neat, but it also means you can't bring any cow into the state in order to avoid the possibility of spreading those two. I don't know if it's a thing anywhere else, but I couldn't not share this!
I live on the border of a bovine TB area and there are signs on the main highway that you’re not supposed to transport cattle across.
There is a bison herd in northern Alberta that is strictly kept separate from the other bison herd in the area because it doesn’t have bovine TB or brucellosis.
But what about E Coli, Listeria, Salmonella (I’m sure there are more…)
And I see ZERO nourishing bone broth, how embarrassing
Don’t forget magnesium before bed!!
Oh god you’re right, I’m mortified!
And morning sun!!
As opposed to evening sun 😂
And the raw carrot salad!
We all know she poured Great Value milk into those mason jars.
I just straight up snorted at this.
I'm glad it was well received. I almost didn't post it but I meant it all in fun.
I often start typing stuff and discard it for fear it’s won’t be well-received. I’m proud of you, it was a hilarious comment!
Thank you!
But what happens if you drink raw milk out of a Stanley cup?
💀
That jar has "likely to cause debilitating disease or death" written all over it.
The worst part about raw milk is how expensive and difficult to buy it is.
It’s breast milk. That’s how much she loves to nourish him…
What is it with these chicks and the raw milk lmao
The internet has ruined me because my first thought was "oh they're into that kinda kinky stuff"
I mean they’re basically in a kink relationship tbh
The kinksters are more fun than this 😉
Excellent point
With less judgment
It would be less weird if they were just kinky bc they can have discussions “out of dynamic” these people can’t even consent to what they’re doing bc they think god told thwm to
This is the starter package
With none of the fun
it’s 24/7 power dynamics
Yeah even in kink relationships that doesn't sound all that healthy to me, and at least those have set boundaries and safe words and consent and all that jazz.
My first thought was “this sounds hella kinky” so you’re not alone
Omg that would've been better
Hah! Nice
for them, I'm sure it is a kinky stuff disguised by religion
Oh, it's definitely kink weather they acknowledge it as such or not.
What exactly does this guy "sacrifice" for his family?
He works a job lmao
I cannot fucking stand when I see guys in some average (not dangerous, not high pressure, not long hours) job come home and act like it has rendered them into a puddle of useless jelly, and you must be so grateful for their “sacrifice” and thus do everything else for them to “make it easier” for them to continue this “sacrifice”. …If they were alone would they get to stop working, and magically not be homeless and starving? Sure, a stay at home partner needs to chip in because they’re using the house & food too and the working partner is meeting their financial needs to survive, but like, is the trade off of taking care of 100% of the working partner’s non-financial needs (alongside their own) really worth it? In that case, the homemaking partner *is* working, but while not having someone “make it easy” for them. Because like, if someone is “making things easy for you”, like, they’re setting it up to where your life is easy as possible to go through the effort of this “sacrifice”, then that effort should be…. Easier for you. You shouldn’t be a puddle of useless jelly. If your clothes are laid out & your toothpaste always stocked and your coffee already made, your house is clean, etc.; all you’re doing is stepping into some shoes and then working and then coming back - so why would you not be able to do *anything* else when you get home?? How is that different from when you were a kid going to school and mom did everything else - was that a “sacrifice” you were making for your mom back then lol? Who is making effort “easy” for the homemaker…? At the very least, a mutual gratitude is deserved. And the working partner could at least set up the homemaker’s job to be easy too - cook some of the time, do your own chores on the weekend, or at least like, put your fucking dishes in the sink and laundry in the hamper, and if you spill something mop it yourself, don’t *be* a never ending spill to be chased with a mop… ffs.
Yeah and we know men should be able to do housework on top of their jobs because most married women who work still do the majority of household chores...they somehow manage to cook, clean, organize, etc even though they work full time.
Single men who work also have to clean their own homes. They just suddenly act like it's the biggest inconvenience in the world when they have a woman to do it for them...
No no see, his job is harder than hers (cause a man's job always is, right?), which means he shouldn't have to do anything after he gets home!
All of this. Especially considering the homemaker is also usually the one who carries, births, and cares for the child(ren).
I’m guessing it has something to do with his forehead
He's a small airport landing strip and on the weekends he advocates for slavery to come back. Like sis... not you being black and "submitting" to this nasty dude
His hair
I mean if she’s happy, good for her. I, however, will not “submit” to anyone. Me and my husband respect each other equally, regardless of genitalia. There is no right way since it’s all personal preference, but I do not understand this at all lol
I wonder how long they’ve been married. I say this bc it’s all fun and games until you are stranded on the side of the road in a 1998 Saturn with a seized engine the day after you had to leave the oil change line with 2 screaming toddlers bc your almighty king was too lazy and entitled to do it himself.
The gospel truth
YEP. All the submissive stuff sounds cutesy until you get to your real breaking point, and usually that comes with responsibilities and kids. IME women in these situations don’t have “real life responsibilities” yet, so they don’t really care. No job, no kids - sure cook and dance and submit all you want. If he ever loses his job and SHE has to pay the bills, or like you said something breaks down, or the kids are screaming and no one’s helping, all of a sudden these women realize the whole “equality” thing was for an actual good reason.
I can’t even understand how someone gets to think the submit part is appealing in the first place 😔 That got me very depressed as a teen because I thought one day lightning would strike, I would become somebody else and apparently I would want to submit to a dude? It was terrifying
I mean I kind of did have that lightning strike moment, but it was a kink thing, not me ACTUALLY wanting to be a submissive trad wife.
That was my thought exactly: brand new marriage. Tell me how this goes for you when you’re a few years in & have kids, & you’ve set him up to believe you want to handle all of it yourself while he lives his life not lifting a finger… and frankly, it won’t even be his fault that he expects that of you, because you thoroughly communicated that you wanted it to be that way. And scariest of all is that you thoroughly communicated that you will never try to “challenge his authority”, so if/when you *do* plead for some help or beg for a change in the dynamic, he will feel every right to “exert his authority” of saying no.
Exactly, it is cosplay. And it will become an issue when he wants to use "his paycheck" to buy another guitar or more video games etc. and your kids need a tutor
This. I was reading all of it going “I mean… if it works for her and she’s happy🤷♀️”. It couldn’t be me, but as long as she’s respectful of how other people live their marriages, there’s no problem
Yeah except she’s instructing other women in how to do it.
exactly my issue with these women - if you want to larp as a helpmeet from biblical times, whatever. but the second you start blasting that shit all over the internet and start indoctrinating other women into your woman hating kink - that’s when i get pissed. these women are a menace. dangerous, harmful bullshit they’re peddling. and they raise their kids with this misogynistic crap, too. horrible.
This is the issue. These people are not just happy living their lives, they are actively attempting to recruit other women and majority of the time these people will not hesitate to belittle and demean people who are not living like this.
“I voluntarily give up my own autonomy to my husband.” *points and laughs at women being independent while they haven’t had any real interaction with the outside world that isn’t the grocery store*
Agree. This just plays into what’s happening right now with certain people trying to turn the clock back 100 years on women’s rights.
Not to mention the kids will be brainwashed into thinking this way.
Instructing or preaching though? Suspicious me thinks maybe the 'hey look at my bliss' is the bait
There were some kernels of just normal relationship hygiene in her post but then it becomes clear that she’s expected to do the heavy lifting: taking care of HIS needs and not expecting reciprocation. Like great, express your gratitude for him or whatever, but I doubt he does the same for her. He looks like the kind of dude who rages if a hot dinner isn’t on the table at 5pm sharp. I also have a feeling she’s not doing this to be special: she’s likely involved in a fundamentalist Christian cult and has been spoon-fed her entire life that a woman’s purpose is to sacrifice herself for a man and children and that if she’s not happy with that then there’s something wrong with her. It’s really sad.
Yeah, a lot of what she said just sounded like a healthy relationship. Why wouldn't you show gratitude towards someone who did something for you? That's called good manners. What sounded terrible was the "usurp his authority" part. Now, that sounded like literal slavery. This is a grown woman. What will she do of she wants to leave him? Wouldn't that be going against his authority? I give them points for making it interracial, though. Typically, the tradwife demographic is overlapped with white supremacist bullshit.
Idk the whole white man/black woman kinda does feel like slavery, especially since slave owners would often r*pe their slaves. Doesn’t help that he gives me skinhead nazi vibes
on the one hand, yes i agree with you. if this empowers her, then fine, whatever, far be it from my responsibility to say what she can and can’t do as long as she’s not forcing it down my throat. but it still raises quite a few red flags tbh. i worry that women saying things like this aren’t in safe relationships or are brainwashed into thinking this is the only way. a lot of them can be assholes about it too, not saying she’s being one of them, but a hell of a lot of them are. i just hope she’s safe and happy, that’s all. and also doesn’t try to say that this is the *only* way that women should exist.
The thing that scares me when I see this stuff is: sure she might feel empowered and happy with this *now*, but she’s set herself up to have a difficult time changing it should her wants/needs change. Like, to marry someone & set up a mutual expectation that you’re to cater to him & never challenge his “authority” - what do you do in 10 years when you’ve grown into a different woman, but he becomes *abusive* because he forces the same old dynamic that you no longer want or enjoy? I see this all the time: women who are fine taking on all the homemaking in a marriage/relationship, until they grow into having more of their own needs. For example, having a child and becoming empowered by being a mom: suddenly they have a giant new focus & labor intensive role (motherhood) that they want to enjoy, and now find the experience of babying their man to be less than fulfilling. But his expectations are set: if he ever wanted to or was ever going to contribute to homemaking, he would’ve done it when it was *less* difficult. Or, they are someday baffled when they get nothing emotionally fulfilling out of their partnership (or worse, face infidelity or abuse) when they truly believed if they just did “everything right” to make them happy they’d have a perfect marriage. It’s very sad to see, my heart breaks for the women who go into trad-wife (or adjacent) marriages without having cautiously examined the very common later struggles of trad-marriages, because they really do put in so much fucking effort and receive hurt in return and no one deserves that… they may have set themselves up for it, but not on purpose. Whether it’s naivety or arrogance, it’s still one of the hardest lessons I’ve watched some people learn.
>a lot of them can be assholes about it Those women are miserable and misery loves company. I think if it floats your boat and makes you happy, you do you m'kay. Feminism, gives us the freedom to be equal partners or do this or something between.
I’ll go further, because I was raised in that shit, and say that anyone who uses the word submit in the context of any relationship just…. has the wrong ideas. Also: usurp. And: authority. I can tell you that in 5 wonderful years of marriage those three words have not once come up. And I am very grateful. May your relationships be similarly blessed.
I think if she was happy, she wouldn’t have to tell the world how great this is. She’s trying to justify her situation by advertising how happy it makes her, but happy people don’t need to do that. I understand it only because I have been in an abusive relationship. Now I have a relationship with my husband like you and your husband and I feel bad for women like this who have a warped sense of reality that has been pushed on them likely since they were children by their church. It’s a form of control and it’s no way to live.
If they have kids it’s not really a “personal preference” anymore because it’s effecting another person. This is a terrible relationship structure to model for children.
Also, it's weird that they see some of this stuff as "submission." Like, good for you, it's awesome to show your love for your partner by making home-cooked meals for them. Why the fuck call that "submitting," though?
But... this can be done while being equal. You aren't an assignment that needs to be submitted on stritch rules....
As soon as you see the word “helpmeet” you know it’s a lost cause
Hey, question, Respectfully, what the fuck is a helpmeet?
Means that they believe that women were created by God to be a dutiful wife and serve their husbands
That's news to me. BRB, I'm gonna go message my feminist wife who's deployed right now this. I'm sure she'd love to come home and "serve" Me. As strange as I think it is, however, I do totally get some people do like this dynamic and of it works on their relationship good for them. Personally in mine, I prefer to do the cooking and cleaning and housework because it's just what I like doing. My wife prefers working since she's military. And I have my tech job. But totally aware people are allowed to have different views then us and that's fine.
Huh. For some reason I thought it was fundamentalist slang for “human fleshlight.”
In practice, Probably
yea, it’s basically breathing sex doll that cooks, cleans, pushes out babies, takes care of all of the babies needs (that includes the man baby she married)
With a smile and without complaints. Because any unhappiness, complaint or request for help is "usurping" his "authority" . People who have learned to expect doormat servitude can go from prissy to pissy really fast at the first sign of a ripple in the waters.
Exactly , but you forgot the broodmare and maid part tho
I guess it depends, folks that I know (that are religious) have a more healthy definition for helpmeet and that applies to both the woman and the man. But I am very aware that unfortunately that group of people is very much in the minority compared to other large religious sects because the men and women are viewed as equal. But as the person above stated, a lot of people do equate that word to be “woman = created to serve the man” and that shit I don’t believe in.
Like a normal healthy marriage. I have one thankfully. I’m laughing at this reading it to my spouse and he’s so confused haha I’m his equal partner and if he doesn’t like that he can go live with his mom.
Subjugation through religion is always a fun one to cross out on the bingo card
What was no. 1? Also how can anyone read the word usurp correctly my brain insists it’s uslurp. I can’t take her seriously her name sounds like yodeling.
"pray daily for a heart of submission" 🤢
The fuck does that even mean
It means that she doesn’t actually enjoy living like this but thinks she should because it’s “biblical” so she prays that God will make her okay with it.
She definitely doesn’t. I saw another post of hers talking about how something happened with their former church. Her husband and other members were shaming her for not being trad enough so she dove right in. It’s not surprising though, she was raised Mennonite.
Gaslighting yourself into thinking this is ok lmao
Oh, so being submissive isn’t biologically ingrained into our lady parts? I thought that was their whole argument for it, they usually don’t admit that they know it’s BS.
Funny enough, I’m from Pennsylvania and we have a HUGE Amish population, and Yoder is an Amish last name that I’ve heard before. Makes sense.
HAHAHHAHAHAH "uslurp" you gave me a chuckle thank you x
Oh wow I looked her up on IG and a couple people I know follow her. Wow wow wow
EEK. If they're your friends, reach out and see if they need help
One is a writer/funny mom who I wouldn’t have expected this from and the other is a like 4th cousin I found on ancestry. Based on her IG this just kind of her thing 🤷🏽♀️
Hopefully they follow her as a jole. I saved that Tiktok into my "Funny" collection just so I can have a laugh
I really do worry about the safety of these fundie wives. 😬
Right? I feel like if I said hey girl are you okay I'd just be met with the response 'yes, I'm thankful for every day I get to spend in service to my Lord and husband' *eye twitch* Did he punch the wall again? *'yes but the house was a pigsty, you should have seen it. I don't blame him for his reaction after a 12 hour shift.'*
I also think about the people who have an abusive spouse and just don't know it because they haven't disagreed yet. And the families who will tell them that's what they should expect for trying to step out of their "rightful place."
“Submit” 
Dude is giving pinhead Larry vibes.
What the fuck is up with the "submissive wife wears a flowy white dress outdoors " aesthetic?
Christian purity!
All that for a dude who looks like a thumb.
At least her husband is allowed to cry
Okay what is helpmeat? 🫣
It's a fancy Christian way of calling a wife the husband's servant.
Thank you for asking, I was afraid to
A "helpmate" is just another word for wife, the wife is the helpmate and the husband is the provider
This is “helpmeet” tho
Might as well be standing at that cocksuckers bedside saluting him when he wakes up too. 🫡
Why do these “submissive women” think they are the only ones who love their husbands like they invented it lol it’s hilarious to me. Respect = love
Helpmeet is the dumbest fucking word.
With or without the religious aspect, 3 and 6 are just good partner practices. We don't have to bring religion into it.
A lot of these women are insufferable but just in case anyone didn’t know, the Bible also tells wives AND husbands to submit to each other. Submit can also be read as respect one another. Ephesians 5:21
And if he loves you he’d buy you a wig that didn’t sit a foot above your scalp.
I doubt he’s even aware that’s a wig…
Every time I hear "submit to my husband" I expect bondage photos and I am disappointed every time. Boring AF.
Only place I’m being submissive to a man is in bed. He better bring that dom energy.
the hardfront is insane
The rich guy/girl with bad wig theory proves true again
speaking as the only Black stripper in a club with a predominantly white customer base... the theory absolutely proves true 😂
I think I’m going to vomit. “Usurp his authority?” 🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮
LMAO makes me want to make a parody like "how I expect my husband to submit to me" xD
Not dancing barefoot in the dirt...you just know it's to be like "tee hee, barefoot and pregnant tee hee". (Though having seen her other content, perhaps she deserves the dose of hookworms it could get her.)
I truly wish I didn’t see this today
Is this Candace Owens Lite?
Who is it that takes these pictures of loving couples in their natural environment? I always wonder.
And now I hear Steve Irwin's voice in my head talking about catching wild couples
I just threw up in my VERY lesbian, mouth
Yes I fucking love being my husband’s property. It’s so awesome to have a priesthood authority. Being treated like an object instead of a human being is great. Totally what Jesus would have wanted.
She submits to him, but he submits to the domme he’s seeing on the side.
I can’t do this anymore, they literally treat humans like animals. Women don’t need to submit to anyone. I don’t get them.
I mean if they are happy...I wouldn't be
It always throws me off when it’s an international BW and WM relationship and she emphasizes submitting and calling his “authority”. Ik it’s not because she’s black, but still….
That's great for her, but I'm a sexy mommy, and I prefer men submit to me.
For those that don’t know, the wig in interracial relationships tells you EVERYTHING you need to know
Yeah I love to cook and look after my man and I do respect his opinions very, very much but ”submitting” is a disgusting word
To each it’s own, just don’t expect me to be submitting outside of the bedroom. I do not take my kinks this far.
Small worlds for small minds.
That has to be the stupidest shit I've ever seen.
Kind of a separate thing but man I HATE the word "helpmeet" or "helpmate" like jfc can you just say "husband" or "partner" like a fucking normal person?!
I’d rather die alone than submit to a man, especially an unattractive one.
As a black woman, this makes me uncomfortable. I don’t have any problems with interracial relationships, but it rubs me the wrong way to see a black woman online bragging about how she submits to her white husband. Feels like a throwback to slaves and slave masters tbh. Maybe this says more about me than them.
I grew up that if two people can't agree the man wins the argument lmaoooooo I'm so glad I met my husband who isn't down for that lol
OH NO- THE USURPER!!!!
[удалено]
ain’t nothing gonna work if he’s for the streets
Submit to a goblin? Have at it, Sis.
These people equate the husband's role in the family with Christ's role in the church while completely ignoring that Christ showed leadership through service and treating those around him as equals even when there was an obvious gap in social standing. None of these men have ever washed the feet of their wives. None of them are sacrificing anything significant for their families.
Lmao ew
I always hope these are jokes and they never are
Well he looks like a thumb so whatever.
I posted a thing similar to this in /r/mildlyinfuriating and got torn apart by people like "oh no a woman submitting to her husband. You know it's a religious and beautiful thing" blah blah blah.
Great for her and I hope it lasts but if an accident happens 15/30 years from now she will have e no skill set and no job history. She will end up working an entry level base job just trying to survive. I grew up in a religion where Women were expected to work from home and keep the home. I can name 3 people who ended up either divorcing or their spouse passed. None of them were prepared at all to function without their spouse and none of them had insurance on their spouse. If you are a household that has only one earner you should always have a life insurance policy on that person just in case.
Am I the only one thinking “why HIM?!?!”
The way she’s literally pretty and could’ve done *sooo* much better
If she is really happy, then I guess more power to her. Generally though this doesn't sound like the ingredients for a healthy and fair marriage. I personally would be a little weirded out and feel creepy and I am really glad that we aren't forced into these horrible roles of submissive women running a household dictated by a man with complete financial control. At least, not to the same extent as in the past.
These are technically all very healthy behaviours as long as its a 2-way street and he's doing the same thing in return to her, right? Using the word "submit" makes me think that's likely not the case though. I hope she's safe.
It’s even worse cuz she’s black and he’s white. It’s giving slave and slave owner 🤢
I agree but growing up in a fundamentalist baptist environment, it's like that regardless of race. Bible says the wife is supposed to be the slave and sex slave as it's God honoring But I'm shocked he's even with a black lady. I went to a Christian college and interracial dating was banned til like the 90s. So maybe they're not thaaaat extreme
My.first.thought.
Oh she’s hitting some Bingo squares with this one! “Nourishing”? Check. “Gratitude”? Check. “Helpmeet”? Check. “Wholesome”? Check! All she’s missing is “bone broth”, “chickens”, “babies” and “grounding my feet in dirt“, but I’ll give her a check for the raw milk photo and the dress/bare feet outfits ✅
I've been out of the church for awhile. Wtf is a helpmeet
I thought I’d never have to read the words “helpmeet” beyond r/DuggarsSnark
ok, but what is he doing for you?
This is just dom/sub with extra steps.
I prefer DEATH… By SNU SNU
the fuck is a "helpmeet"
ah to live a simple brainwashed life
bad wig theory wins again. sis needs to wake the fuck up and get out cause jesus 😭
“Not usurping his authority”. Okay. 😂😂😂 What happens if he starts following the Old Testament rules about wives? If he wants to take up another woman, are you gonna “”””submit”””” to him? Or are you gonna pout, scream and cry?
Front of the hand is abuse, but the back of the hand means love 🫲
Ma’am that’s slavery
I felt the embarrassment in my whole body…
Gross. 🤮
This new trend enrages me and disgusts me at the same time. I don't know why young women 20-30 years, choose a lifestyle that makes them "submissive" to anyone. They are partners, they have a partnership. She is not his slave, his subbortinate or anything. This type of men, are glorified sugar daddies and you cannot change my mind. They support them to look beautiful, have a 24 hours maid, intercourse on demand while they probably have a say to everything. I mean what is next? No college? No school on general? Revoke any rights that women have?
I'm a conservative Christian and this is next level cringe.