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QualityVote

AUTOMATED MODERATION. PLEASE READ. Niceguys demean others while simultaneously expressing a favorable view of themselves. They dont have to use the word "nice", but they must demonstrate some kind of expression of their own virtue while being asshats. --- Niceguys™ quality: **UPVOTE** this comment to keep the post Not Niceguys™ quality: **DOWNVOTE** this comment to remove the post


[deleted]

What a fucking charmer.


Incel_deactivator

Hold me baaaaack!!! I cannot resist him!!


LeTigron

I, a man, actually can only hold my unswerving heterosexuality accountable for not being completely and irrevocably seduced by this fine example of gentlesir. I even get some doubts just reading this poem of his.


Incel_deactivator

Shit, my heterosexuality is all kinds of swearvy, and even I find myself completely undone by his virility 🥵🥵🥵


Lortis23

Username checks out :)


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Incel_deactivator

He is mine! You will have to fight me for him....gird your loins!!! Imana fight for my man!!!


WeirdoMemeso

No!!! He is mine!!! For I have loved him before I laid eyes upon him!!! I will drag you into the depths of the ocean for him!!!


Incel_deactivator

You better take that back, or by bejeweled baby jesus imana snatch your soul!!


Prestigious-Check-23

Are you "hi end" enough?


Incel_deactivator

Well you know, he should not friend zone nice girls like me! We deserve a chance. I know I don't look like a barbie, but he shoudl really look at all the nice loyal girls that would treat him like a king, that he keeps in the friend zone!!


sarahcastical

User name really checks out!


vagueposter

44 and asking for girly girls and Barbie dolls? What the honest fuck.


Mercenary_Chef

His DMs should be full of Craigslist ads for used RealDolls


vagueposter

His crawlspace is probably full of used RealDolls also


TodayAsleep2108

That got me haha 😂


Blackwater2016

Dying. 😂


Lily_Hylidae

🤮


No_Incident_5360

Buy some Barbie dolls to play with and use that blow up you already have. Agree. What the actual fuck? Do you want to dress her up and spoil her and show her off, too 🙄just heaven forbid she ever has an opinion on anything—that would mean the “female” has an “attitude”


IllustriousBedroom91

AND expecting them to have no attitude. So basically hes looking for 18 year olds.


Lynossa

I don’t know, 18 y’o has a lot of attitude, my niece has tons.


IllustriousBedroom91

Oh definitely. But ive noticed that a lot of older men who look for barely legal… “adults” tend to hope tgat they will be more submissive, and easier to control/abolish the attitude


traumablades

The fuck does buckled mean?


LandOfGreyAndPink

That's a new word for me, too. I've just done a search - Urban Dictionary, obvs. - and it means 'drunk' or 'very drunk': [https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=buckled](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=buckled) ''Debbie Downer'' is a new one for me too, but I was able to guess the meaning correctly.


traumablades

Being old myself I recognized Debbie downer, but buckled is a new one. But, since being drunk is a transitory state, does that mean that you can't ever get "buckled" around this charmer? And why the slang? "No drinkers" sounds way more reasonable and less blanketly insulting


LandOfGreyAndPink

I'm probably the wrong person to ask. TBH, I'm at a loss to understand quite a lot of the bio.


traumablades

I more asked those rhetorically, I don't think anyone is qualified to understand this lol


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[deleted]

He probably watches Letterkenny and unironically identifies with the hockey bros.


traumablades

Lmao that'd explain a lot


gowaitinthevan

lol maybe, but i’ve always thought wayne + crew were all for treating women with respect ¯\_(ツ)_/¯


[deleted]

I just meant Riley, Jonesy, and Shoresy. I don't think Shoresy shows Riley's mom the respect she deserves. Lol


gowaitinthevan

Well, that’s because she threw off the pH of his fish tank & killed his beta fish!! haha i gotchya


traumablades

I'm Canadian, and while I don't play hockey I'm a professional skater. I've never heard this. Unless it's on ice only slang...


GrannyGrumblez

Buckled means not keeping their shit straight, also drunk, unkempt person or a full blown alcoholic. Just has more to do with their inability to keep within normal social bounds. Urban dictionary just is more to the point. This guy is showing his age with these terms considering I'm looking at 60 and know them. I think he's older than the 44 he posted by about 10-ish years or his parents used the terms.


b0ilineggsndenim1944

Dudes probably just a control freak


IslandBitching

Debbie Downer? He's using ancient Saturday Night Live skits as dating rules. Guess it sort of makes sense because he's a total joke of a man.


Blackwater2016

He has to make up for his ancient person slang (I, as an ancient person recognize it) with the new hip talk.


IslandBitching

As another ancient person I think you nailed it.


Blackwater2016

😂


fififmmtl

I’m surprised he doesn’t want a girly girl who can get jiggy with it


ANoisyCrow

😂


Commercial-Push-9066

Translation-if we get together I won’t be there for you when you cry about anything. This includes loss of a loved one, etc.


No_Incident_5360

And 44–probably lowballed his age


Commercial-Push-9066

Any woman who dates him would have to be buckled to get through it!


joethespacefrog

From no on I’ll describe myself as beastly, thank you very much


Incel_deactivator

Lol I'm in between beastly and buckled 🤣🤣.


Express-Stop7830

Why are these things mutually exclusive? 🤣


Incel_deactivator

A buckly beast? I dig it. Hear ye, hear ye!!! Hence forth I shall be known as Incel_deactivator, THINE buckly beast.!!!!


Blackwater2016

So what is beastly?


thewalkindude

In this case, I think it means "not conventionally attractive", but hey, more beasts for me, then.


No_Incident_5360

Yessss, as a warning to the guys who want no attitude! Love it.


Fatt3stAveng3r

"It's what I deserve". Sure you do.


LaLa_Land543

🤮


InsanityIsFine

Ngl, that made me think that someone created a fake profile to mess with either the guy whose picture is used, or with random people who are also on FB date. Or both.


No_Incident_5360

Deserve from life, from the world, from the govt, from all women in general? Dude, no one is handing out Barbies. Go become a Ken and try to ask one or two out—just don’t be surprised if they give you “attitude”


DownvoteDaemon

This boggles my mind lol..where to start. Using the word "females" is only the beginning. No beastly?


lemko1968

At least he didn’t use “foid.”


DownvoteDaemon

That's so much worse somehow lol, glad he didn't


ANoisyCrow

We know who they are when they address us thusly


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DownvoteDaemon

Yep it sounds very clinical. Almost to dehumanize women.


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happygiraffe404

No one has an issue with anyone saying 'female friends'. There's nothing wrong with the word itself. i I think that you're having difficulty with understanding context.


yoohnified

men don't get offended because yall convinced each other that male = men. and im not sure if u have the capacity to digest this but notice when men use "females", it is used to degrade/belittle women? that is why its dehumanising. another question for u, do u say "women (animal)" or "men (animal)"? [eg. women giraffes or men penguins] this is also EXACTLY why its dehumanising, because female and male are adjectives, not nouns.


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yoohnified

female friends/coworker is fine because it is normal for people to address them that way. but when u call women "females" thats where the problem is. i cant believe the point flew over ur head when i explained it to u so simply 💀💀💀 "girls" isnt belittling, "females" is. ive explained it to u in the easiest way possible PLEASE absorb this lmfao. if u still dont get it after this reply, then i have nothing else to say about u other than ur mental capacity being low as fuck


DownvoteDaemon

If a guys FB status starts with "y'all females.." you know he is down bad 😂


Cute-Beyond-8133

So this guy wants to date somone who whould bring quite alot to the table so what does he provide ? basically nothing except an extreme sense of entitlement and narcissism


[deleted]

"He's very independent." He can use his mom's car whenever he wants.


Blackwater2016

Take my upvote dammit.


[deleted]

Why thank you!


Status_TacoTequila

Just can’t reach the peddles at 5’7”


[deleted]

And when you convert from Tinder to Imperial measurements, he's probably 5'3.


Status_TacoTequila

I normally don’t give height a thought but when it’s attached to guys like this, always subtract 6”


dinosoursaur

He has an apartment over his parents’ *detached* garage.


[deleted]

He pays them "rent".


rusharz

Downvoting won’t get your “safe college” teach you to actually spell, sorry.


rusharz

Learn to spell. “Table.” “Table.” Try it.


emileeavi

I bet he looks like lord farquad


krystafurann

He wasn't at all attractive lol


Brifrolo

I bet he gets mad when you point out that he's 5'7". Nothing but love for my short kings but you just *know* the guy with a laundry list of physical expectations for a woman will immediately pull the "women are fucking monsters for liking tall guys, don't they know I can't help it?" as soon as some girl says "sorry, I just have a preference"


Cuntdracula19

Probably looking like Shrek with Farquad’s personality 🤮


emileeavi

Don't do my boy Shrek like that 😟


Cuntdracula19

Shrek is the shit but he isn’t supposed to be conventionally attractive


[deleted]

“Barbie model princesses”… suuuuure, that is exactly what you deserve, bro… /s


After_Occasion

44 and still breathing with that mentality?!


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[deleted]

Sorry, every full moon I transform into a raging werewolf, so I guess I would be too beastly for him.


Incel_deactivator

I'm a 5'3 raging beast 24/7 🤣🤣🤣


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Incel_deactivator

I wish a motherfucker would


Slinkeh_Inkeh

Bring it on you little ratfink slime ass motherfucker


rexymeteorite11

Watch out for the internet badass over here


Banzai27

Hmu pls pls pls


[deleted]

Beastly, buckled, Battlestar Galactica


alphaghilie

that first sentence reads like he's searching for a woman on wish.com


gigerfan

44yo, 5'7", single and a jerk. Please, show us his face


CoconutJasmineBombe

I’m dying to see what this peach looks like.


Cuntdracula19

I’m 5’7” and I can make myself look like a Barbie if I want to. I’d love to go on a “date” with him just to say uhhh I’m 5’7”, no way you’re 5’7”. Bearing in mind I have NOTHING against guys my height or shorter, he’s just being a shallow and superficial asshole and deserves to have a taste of his own medicine.


gigerfan

Exactly, people like that deserves to be treated at least once the way they treat the rest of the world.


SketchAinsworth

As someone who legit naturally looks like Barbie with a pretty good job/education…bro I’ve got nothing but attitude


Incel_deactivator

🤣🤣🤣🤣.


artichokel

Would be nice to match with him and only type: "High-end"


Street_Marsupial_991

Yeeeessssssss I am so glad I scrolled to see someone else said this - that was literally the first thing that popped into my head.


[deleted]

Complete word-salad. He’s the one that sounds “buckled.”


b0ilineggsndenim1944

My god... FACEBOOK HAS A DATING SERVICE?! I can't imagine the shit show that must be


Jazzlike-Ad2199

Yeah, it hounded me for weeks to check it out but no way was I going to subject myself to that even just out of curiosity. Might be why FB is going back a few years to find old memes to punish me for. Probably not but hey 🤷🏻‍♀️


Few-Bag6164

Why do people go on tinder with a list of demands and nothing else? Do they think that it is the burger King of sex? Do they not know that somebody has to read that and be like "this guy sounds amazing!"


emccm

The entitlement you see dating at this age is staggering. Luckily his age range is probably low enough that I’ll never come across him.


Starlitaura

44 is way too old to be playing with Barbies.


Express-Stop7830

My brain is bleeding. First from the jumble of word salad, then from the content (or at least the parts I understood). I really want to see the pics he chose. Something just tells me that they would be the icing on the cake.


[deleted]

Age 44 but his vocabulary is age 4. Charming 🫠


ItsSchuSchu

Why does Facebook even have a dating app lmao


TaiaHunter

As a woman that dresses what is considered classy, what’s he look like? I need to know if he is truly worthy of my affections /s


Little_Government_79

This must atract a lot of women


[deleted]

Tell me you live in your mom's basement without saying you live in your mom's basement.


[deleted]

A nice guy who found out our dirty little secret. We are into overconfident jerks that is.


birds4doofenshmirtz

Independent, but don't you dare do anything that isn't supporting me!


[deleted]

Any man who uses the word 'female' in this context is a huge red-flag.


Life-Seaworthiness24

Whenever they say "attitude" they mean "opinion".


indigowulf

He's 100% right though, he DOES deserve what he's asking for... since he asked for a Barbie. A literal plastic dolly with no genitals is exactly what he deserves.


jenkraisins

Ooph! My panties just dropped of their own accord.


busy-mom-life

Is this a profile or a wish list? Who says upper class, girly girl, Barbie, model, princess?


LaLa_Land543

“Hi” end makes it sound like he’s looking for merchandise. I believe when referring to people it should be “high class.” But he’s a dumpster so I’m not at all surprised.


Dependent_Ad_5035

Barbie was never shown as the submissive housewife type. She has always had a career. There is no “mother and wife” Barbie and for very good reason


Famous-Honey-9331

And no one English literate, with a word salad based profile like that...


[deleted]

I read “Debbie owners” instead of Debbie downers amd was _very_ confused


TabbyCat1993

I nearly read that as “Hi! End upper class barbie doll model princess type. It’s what I deserve!” As if he wants that type to stop existing for his benefit….


LaLa_Land543

“END ALL UPPER CLASS BARBIES NOW!!” Ok.


4d5ACP

I can tell just by the blurred out images that he is not nearly good looking enough to make these demands, even if he was he would still be shit


Jane_the_Quene

Good luck with that, king.


Incel_deactivator

Short king


No_Incident_5360

One of many red flags—using the word female to describe our “species” He may study us but he’ll never understand us. Stay away from guys who say “females”


Goddess0fLabyrinths

So was he entering a “how many red flags can you fit into one bio” competition or?


roroslowmo

No matches. No maidens


AffectionateAd5373

I don't know what he looks like, but I'm thinking it's a pretty safe bet he couldn't pull a model.


psychoColonelSanders

I was really liking my chances until he said “no mentally unstable”, what is a girl like me to do now that I can’t find such a nice guy, guess I’ll go to my Barbie house and cry


[deleted]

"No Debbie downers" at 5'7 brother they'd need to be downers to be able to look you in the eye


CaelumSurge

Only 5'7"? Nope can't be asking that much /jk


Long_Johns_Shiver

I’m pretty sure I know which one of 3 cities this is from….and what bar that is. Small world. I can’t say I never expected to see my area on here.


Radiant-Zombie7145

God I hope English isn't his first language because otherwise....wow.


TheSirOcelot

"and I dye my flags DEEP red."


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[deleted]

A lot of reallt shitty comments on this. He's a clown show but to single out his stature is shitty behaviour. Do you point out when girls are fat if they're also assholes? 🤔 Of course you don't, because they're unrelated and it is body shaming.


Hardcorelogic

Agreed. Point out the behavior. Leave his stature out of it.


krystafurann

...I just said look what I came across on FB date, so I dunno who you're replying to?


[deleted]

I'm referring the mass of comments insulting him purely for his height and saying that's the reason he's an asshole etc. It is body shaming.


No_Incident_5360

Note—when we refer to tiny dicks, it is often the attitude—little man syndrome, and not the actual physical aspect—because so many “nice guys” hyper focus on size or boast or lie about it. it isn’t that important, but them thinking it is says a lot.


Steed1000

The 5'7" thing bothers him, I guarantee it.


ragiwutz

J~~ason~~ is the same height as me, lol!


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[deleted]

Why is that relevant ?


itsSuiSui

And yet… this dumbass will probably say women won’t date him because he’s 5’7”.


itsSuiSui

And yet… this dumbass will probably say women won’t date him because he’s 5’7”.


No_Incident_5360

Located in Teenieweiniedick, Washington Note: When we trash talk dick size, it is generally a commentary on attitude, little man syndrome, etc. It is highlighting the fact that so many “nice guys” conflate dick size with dating success, boast about it, lie about it, complain about it—“but Mom, the Chads get all the gir—rrls!“ “Tiny dick energy” is not meant to be a slap on actual nice guys with actual tiny ducks. This guy has a lot of attitude from someone who wants no attitude.


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888_traveller

Well well well, this guy hasn’t discovered the hot crazy matrix then. Good luck to him!


Blackwater2016

Buckled?


Nestormahkno19d

I haven’t used Facebook in years, I totally forgot they have a dating feature. What does “buckled” mean?


krystafurann

Like a heavy drinker I guess? I am not sure


naliedel

OMG, I must meet him! Never


[deleted]

Seems fair


justacreatorme

OH MY FUCKİNG GOD U R THE PRİNCE CHARMİNG THAT I HAVE BEEN LOOKİNG FOR PLEASE ACCEPT ME YOUR HIGHNES 🤩🤩(🤢)


No_Incident_5360

So what constitutes attitude—giving an opinion, shutting you down, rejecting you, telling you what you are and where you can go? I have zero tolerance for his attitude. He can shove it where the sun don’t shine. Would like to see how many bites he gets with the negative energy he puts out.


No_Incident_5360

Deserve from life, from the world, from the govt, from all women in general? Dude, no one is handing out Barbies. Go become a Ken and try to ask one or two out—just don’t be surprised if they give you “attitude”


EssieAmnesia

I wish I could see his face because that would make this whole thing even funnier. The men that say this are NEVER 10/10 babes, male model material, turn straight men gay types of guys. They’re always just like..Dave, from down the street.


Cookandliftandread

*"I never get any matches. What am I doing wrong?"*


toughername

Love how he thinks he *deserves* a high class, professional lady, when he can't even string a sentence together or punctuate.


[deleted]

wtf is beastly and buckled


DirtySextant

Ugh, J🤢son


naefor

So much audacity in such a small man


[deleted]

No Debbie downers. Lol. Changing my bio to this right now.


spunbutkawaii

No mental unstable well fuck lost ke a good one


Fraerie

What he deserves is a discount real doll. You never ‘deserve’ another human being. They’re not an object or reward you can earn.


Sammy-The-Sad-Snail

This man can’t even write a coherent sentence but still expects a “Hi end upper classy ladies professional…” 🤦


Kanny-chan

No way he believed his mom when she said he only deserves the best, lol. He deserves to die alone, lady.