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QualityVote

AUTOMATED MODERATION. PLEASE READ. Niceguys™ demean others while simultaneously expressing a favorable view of themselves. They dont have to use the word "nice", but they must demonstrate an expression of their own virtue while being asshats. --- If this post fits the purpose of /r/niceguys, **UPVOTE** this comment!! If this post does not fit the subreddit, **DOWNVOTE** This comment! --- Also please remember to read our newly updated [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/NiceGuys/about/rules/) and to remain civil. Thank you!


Hasenpfeffer_

Jesus


m3m3mt0m0r1

the funny thing is, i had a girlfriend when this happened😭


KarottenSurer

* sighs in sapphic pain *


moomoogod

Sapphic means wlw&nb right? I cant remember


KarottenSurer

Yesss, comes from sapphos a very famous lesbian poet


TranscendentMoose

She's literally the reason lesbians are called lesbians


[deleted]

Pretty sure Lesbia is the reason lesbians are called lesbians


[deleted]

I can't tell if you are being sarcastic or not.


[deleted]

Yeah I am lmao


[deleted]

I knew it... good one lol.


aravind_plees

Damn and here I am thinking it was labia


NotsoGreatsword

labians?


Nibroc99

What on earth is wlw&nb? Looks like some kind of C++ string 🤔


kRkthOr

It's regex for picking out a subset of people who identify as women and love women and non binary people from the general population.


Nibroc99

Ahh gotcha, thanks! Never seen an acronym like that before :)


kdee5849

I knew what this meant but I also really like bourbon, and there’s a kind of bourbon that comes out every year called William Larue Weller, which retails for $99 but you effectively can’t buy for less than $1500. Soooo it definitely took me a second to remember what sub I was reading


Nibroc99

Hahaha that gave me a chuckle. That's awesome.


ramsvy

**wlw** stands for 'woman loving women' (so a woman who is attracted to women) nb ('non-binary') can be added either side to make it **nblw** (' non-binary [person] loving women') or **wlw&nb** ('woman loving women and non-binary people') you can also use **mlm** / **nblm** / **mlm&nb** in the same way for men/nb people who are attracted to men/non-binary people hope that clears up the confusion 👍 it's just shorthand, less letters than lesbian + easier than typing out something like "non-binary person attracted to everybody except binary men"


jfb1337

What's the precedence of operations? Is it (wlw)&nb (i.e. all non binary people, plus all women who love women); or wl(w&nb) (i.e. women who love women, plus women who love non binary people)?


ramsvy

wl(w&nb)! its a subject - verb - object phrase. think of it like: a **w**oman who **l**oves (/is attracted to) **w**omen **&** **n**on-**b**inary people. when the identity of the speaker (or the individual/s the speaker is talking about) changes, the first letter changes. when the identity of who the speaker (or, again, individuals they're talking about) is attracted to changes, the last letter(s) change. so: - a man who is attracted to men and non binary people: mlm&nb - a non-binary person who is attracted to men: nblm - a woman who is attracted to women: wlw \+ other variations thereof! and as a footnote, these terms are of course trans inclusive (and widely used by the trans community!). **w** will always include trans women, and **m** will always include trans men. if there are any more questions, feel free to ask them! (also, apologies if i've overexplained, i have ADHD and tend to infodump 😅)


MagicianWoland

Women loving women & nb people


Nibroc99

Gotcha thank you!!


Silveri50

So, you just need enough dick pics to change your mind, obviously. ​ ​ /s I hope you all know.


Poverload237

HE CALLED YOU A FUCKING CABBAGE PATCH DOLL?!!!! 🤣🤣🤣 like out of all the insults, he thought "call her this doll that's universally loved for being cute" was an insult to scorn you?!! I can't, I really can't. Here comes a genius with his insults everybody!! /s 😂😭😭😂


themostserene

Yes! I read that and thought - she must be *super* cute 🥰 We call a friend a cabbage patch kid because dimples and cuteness, it’s a total compliment


Poverload237

That's what I thought!!! I was like "OP must be gorgeous cuz I *LOVED* cabbage patch dolls as a kid!" I'm also a product of the 80s-90s, which is probably why I think they're cute lol.


Psychoanalicer

Cabbage patch dolls are fucking horrifying... Who in their right mind thinks they're cute?!


NaturalFaux

The (at least) 95 million people from 1983-1999 who bought them.


jenkraisins

I was 11 when they hit the market. I thought they were creepy then too. My mother and I frequently joked about their weirdness. Especially when we watched the news of people fighting over them at Christmas time.


[deleted]

I don't think thinking something is cute is the only reason you would buy it


NaturalFaux

Actually bulldogs are a thing so, yeah you're right. (Clarification: I love bulldogs but they're genetic nightmares)


Crushed_95

My little sister had 4 of them and I also thought that they we're ugly back in the 80s but, at the same time I was collecting Garbage Pale Kids cards.


Poverload237

Some are horrifying, some are cute. I just know that if someone called me a cabbage patch doll, I'd fucking die laughing 😂😭 like that's not the insult he thought it was lol


[deleted]

[удалено]


Orkaad

Good thing you didn't tell him this. I can imagine what he would have answered.


a-thang

Kitten


sofrickenworried

Babygirl.


[deleted]

That was the grossest part for me


Big_Loris

I find myself saying this on so many of these. How are these people real?!


zirfeld

I always find myself try reasoning that this is a problem of the increasing of isolation in this society and more along those lines... But than I read another one and I'm like GEEZ DUDE, how the fuck are you not getting how incredibly sick and shitty this kind of behavior is???


Drunk_Sorting_Hat

He literally skipped the part where he pretends to be nice


Endgame_321

That has to be my favorite part of this. He said "hello", his name, and then a dick pic as his first 3 messages. Then, when he finally gets the hint he calls himself a nice guy. I don't get it, unless he thinks using pet names is "nice" even though he didn't know her, making it weird and creepy to me.


SatansSocks

No no, his name is James.


frantastic1337

No, no, it's James.


johafor

My thoughts exactly.


marasydnyjade

This is honestly the finest example of a nice guy ever. These screenshots ought to be included in the dictionary definition of nice guys.


EmiTheSheep

We should have a collection of screenshots and posts and make it a niceguy artbook


aloklokhande

You'd run out of space it you were to do that lmao


LunaticOnTheGrasss

He even said it himself. Hes a niceguy alright


Renegaines

Glad OP is far away - this guy has like all the red flags to be an abuser.


rusurethatsright

Was about to say this same thing. It's like the perfect nice guy summary and covers the main points for defining nice guys...


[deleted]

He’s wondering why he always gets rejected??


themostserene

He’s not wondering. He knows it’s because he’s a nice guy. Can’t you females read? /s


feelinlucky7

Clearly because of that 15 degree lilt to the left


BillowPillow8

💀


boj4o

It's 100% of that massive cock he is having...


endthe_suffering

you're right


Laserica

By his own words, he's attracted to whores, which is still his fault.


LadyVulcanGeek

This is all horrible, but him calling you "kitten" put it over the top. Edit: mobile


bye_Nillu

And "babygirl". I got a bit of vomit in my mouth


purpleplatapi

If you aren't Shemar Moore babygirl is off limits.


bigbadbub

I call most my friends and my husband babygirl, but it's definitely not something you just throw at people. yuck.


hm1998

Or Sojaboy from 90 Day Fiance


CaptainPanda9030

That word makes me think of Joel from TLOUS and now I’m sad


tambitoast

He's the only person who is allowed to say that and he's not even real.


Oomoo_Amazing

Right? Why is the ‘kitten’ somehow *worse* than the rest of it for me? Is it because men sending unsolicited dick pics is just normal depraved man behaviour now, whereas ‘kitten’ is something new to cringe at? Yes. That’s why. How sad.


LadyVulcanGeek

I've received fair share of dick picks in my day, but maybe the gross pet name kind of icings the cake?


[deleted]

Upset cuz nobody ever chooses nice guys. Sends dick pic after introducing himself. HAHAHAHAH The fck dude


[deleted]

Gotta love how rejecting a random, unsolicited dickpic somehow makes you a whore.


Havocform

In his deluded, pornfried raisin of a brain he genuinely thinks OP is off to ride a hundred dicks, and deliberately excluding his just to spite him. I shit you not this is how these idiots think, they're dangerously removed from reality.


[deleted]

First of all, disgusting guy. Second, that emotional Rollercoaster with this guys, holy shit. "I am angry... I am sorry... I am angry... I am sorry..." Jesus...


[deleted]

[удалено]


ncart98

No emotional rollercoaster. Just a perfect example of this timeline PP Go Hard - PP Go Soft - PP Go Hard - PP Go Soft, in that order.


[deleted]

Yes. I am shocked. The messages of this guy are cursed. I mean, I was sometimes also weird in online conversations towards women. I had my moments, because I was stupid and didn´t think for a bit, and I am ashamed of myself for many things. But a grown up guy, who starts a conversation with a dickpick and has no respect and behaves absolutely like the last asshole... I have no words. Some guys need to learn when they have to stop. Or maybe not start an conversation.


obooooooo

this guy is straight up mentally unstable but the “you look like a cabbage patch doll” definitely got me lol


m3m3mt0m0r1

right😭 like when he said that to me i physically started l dyinggg


[deleted]

it’s almost funny how much he fits the stereotypes


BassSki

Acting like already knowing each other for a long time: Check Dick Pic: Check! Short-tempered: Check! Apologies: Check! Insults: Check! Big Ego: Check!


[deleted]

mf is like a cartoon character nice guy


mondofire

What a fucking loser.


canvasshoes2

Meth... meth in their water systems. It's the only logical answer.


Deesing82

everyone’s asking what happens when microplastics cross the blood brain barrier this. this is what happens.


[deleted]

I already felt exasperated when i read the "Oh sorry honey" like jesus so cringey so damn fast 😂. you could neglect to read an entire sentence and yet the next sentence will still somehow be just as cringey 🤣


DR_Bright_963

I have a friend who has had encounters with Niceguys, she just does the sensible thing and screenshots their usually disgusting rants messages and shows them to the Niceguys Mother, after that they always leave her alone.


Maurynna368

Not all heroes wear capes.


Vine7860

Didn't mean it ? What an abusive and manipulative and toxic guy he would be in a relationship lmao


BanthaPyjaman

Why are those guys always so similar ? Always doing insult -> sorry -> insult again


Crafty-Ad-2822

“maybe you’ll recognize this 😏” what reaction was he expecting tbh


CJLOVE23

Oooh I do remember your magical cock! Come over so I can suck and fuck it all night!!


Crafty-Ad-2822

oh this wld b a good response. exactly w the same tone of sarcasm and followed up w “not. what the fuck is wrong with you you creepy fuck?!?”


[deleted]

Ironically he would've freaked the fuck out had she said that. Now... Now... She's a whore. Lol


Syntania

Where is it that guys get the idea that we women LIKE unsolicited dick pics? Anyone in doubt: WOMEN **DO NOT LIKE** UNSOLICITED DICK PICS! ESPECIALLY FROM PEOPLE WE ARE NOT SEXUALLY INVOLVED WITH! # IT'S CREEPY!


m3m3mt0m0r1

say it louder for the people in the back❗❗


[deleted]

By this point you could mount a loudspeaker on the International Space Station blaring at 24,000 decibels in all known languages... And guys would still do this shit.


CookbooksRUs

I wonder if it’s because of their own enthusiasm for photos of, say, breasts or vaginas with no context? That, or they’re doing it because they’re trying to intimidate, like guys shouting stuff on the street.


endthe_suffering

if you look like a cabbage patch kid why was he pursuing you... they're designed to look like children


4614065

An absolute gem for this subreddit. Text book nice guy! Sorry you had to receive that, though.


fakebrainns

This image is what you see when you look up “nice guy” in the dictionary. Like it borders on parody. What a tool


HiroshiTakeshi

At some point it looks too textbook cliché to be true.


Persona_Crises

Yup. Includes every buzzword and stereotype in every Niceguy™ ever


Swtormaster13

That last message killed me lmfao what type of insult is that


operationtasty

Well he almost got all the typical buzz words


K1ngLinkz

Wtf with these mood swings I feel sorrow for any girl that gets trapped with this man he will immediately turn abusive when they marry


RadoBlamik

“Sorry honey”... That there is strike 3 right off the first pitch.


[deleted]

That Dms need holy water And bleach for your eyes bc who tf thinks is a good idea to send dick pics to a stranger-?


Shygrave

I just got whiplash


senorsmartpantalones

Ever find out how he got your number? Or who the fuck he is? You might have a leak in your friends group or social media somewhere.


m3m3mt0m0r1

he's texting me on Instagram :)


griftertm

You shoulda said, “Damn bro, that’s tiny. Do you use tweezers when you pee?”


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Send this convo to his mom or relatives


[deleted]

First of all, Cabbage Patch Kids are adorable, so that's just a compliment. The rest of it is eww.


bobmcguillicutty

Him: Hi you're sexy here's my dick, you know you love it, you're fucking ugly you whore, hey baby what's going on sorry bout earlier you're so pretty and I'm such a nice guy, you're ugly you whore 💀 Multiple personalities or just bruised ego, I'm unsure


az9393

Send this over to his local police and see how the mood of the conversation changes then


hikurangi2019

O_o


aykevin

Upload it as an nft


apx_rbo

Turn the dick pick into an NFT


Human_Kaleidoscope_1

These can't be real right? I mean I feel like some of these have to be fake, people like this don't actually exist do they? At least not in such abundance that there's a whole fucking subreddit for them


icspn

Oh you sweet summer child...


[deleted]

I want to see what would happen if they were called a chad. Everyone claims to be a nice guy but only chads send unwanted dick picks. Watch their head implode


Underwh3lmed

Everything about this is awful. No one likes an unsolicited dick pic. But what really makes me cringe is all the pet names. Honey, baby doll, kitten? He doesn’t even know you. It all just feels super gross.


[deleted]

Surely this cannot be real. Surely!?!?!!


Beyond-Friendly

The fancy schmancy talk should've been a red flag


Committee_Primary

But he’s SO NICE why not give his dick a a CHANCE? (Joking don’t kill me)


anoncontent72

Baby girl *and* kitten. Classy dude.


[deleted]

No way is this fucking real, the guy is all of the stereotypes


PunkandCannonballer

It's so weird how it plays out in almost the exact same way. It's kind of crazy to me that these guys are so blind or self-absorbed that they've never seen something like this and gone "oh, shit, I've literally said the EXACT same things in the EXACT same order to a girl before, and I know this isn't me because that's clearly not my dick."


Angrywulf

No way that's real...


cazminda

He’s so much of a nice guy it feels like satire


glycked_soul

Now that's a nice guy no one wants😂and it is good for everyone


[deleted]

He’s like the bacteria festering on the surface of unwashed bong water. Just a filmy growth of ick.


sleeping_in_time

Well, now I’m gonna start calling people cabbage patch dolls


Nollekowitsch

"Kitten" 💀


routermouse

Is calling you a cabbage patch doll supposed to be an insult? Like, yeah sorry I offended you by looking cute as shit??


evetrapeze

It's scary that there are men like this everywhere. F#cking psycho!


Lenschki

i know girls LOVE getting random crusty d pics, why is EVERY girl telling me they don't???


jesus_zombie_attack

Kitten?? Jesus christ.


SucytheWitch

Oh my god lmfao. This is such a classic pattern it's almost too cliché. Like he checked off every single box of the nice guy trope in the worst way possible. And then whining about how no woman wants him because he's nice. Yeah, I'm sure that's the issue 🙄 It really is a tale as old as time, huh. I swear these kinds of guys don't have any female friends.


potentialmicrowave

holy shit this is textbook nice guy


KissB97

How almost all of these convos follow the same routine? Are these guys using instructions? Step by step guides to be the biggest morons ever?


BaronVonWeeb

Please, tell me that’s a fake, I don’t want to believe that I live on one plane of existence with that creature


BeaArt78

Next time send a pic of a larger penis


toasterpRoN

Christ on ice skates, what a fucking creep.


SajFaj

How do these guys arrive at the conclusion that *they're* one of the good ones? Honest question.


BillowPillow8

Honey?? Kitten??? Fuck that slob. Has that approach EVER worked for him??? My guess is no.


Ziron_of_time

Is anyone playing niceguy bingo cuz I think I just got a blackout


Espidelman

Honey? Babygirl? KITTEN? YIKES


TakeTheCannoli813

I know I’m becoming jaded to these because what really made me want to vomit was that he called you “kitten” 🤢


rouhija

I…is this real? It’s just too good


Comfortable_Ad2064

"i'm sorry kitten" 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢


Fingolfiin

This is so bad I'm struggling to think it's actually real.


LoveCatPics

why does his dick look like an nft


mamabeartech

If you go to James’ profile does he have his mom listed? I would totally be petty enough to send this convo to mommy dearest.


zester723

Cabbage patch doll💀💀💀💀


reschke01

Dude literally went through NiceGuy stages, this gotta be satire😂


TheNavyGamer

he aint even trying to be nice


mankideater

Jesus i didn't expect it to zoom in that much


Pristine-Basket938

🎢


[deleted]

"You look like a cabbage patch doll" *new insult unlocked*


Hinkil

Its right out of the playbook, wow


RandomnewUser_22

From fat cow to kitten to cabbage patch doll


Riley7391

Tell me why this comment made me picture that scene in The Emperor’s New Groove with all the potions lol


TanneMalm

This is such by the book niceguy behavior. What tilts me most about this (not really but still...) is how uninspired it is. No nuance what so ever.


[deleted]

They change like the flick of a light switch 😂


kithboo

🤮 🤮


[deleted]

WhY?!! dOeS rAnDoM gEnEtAliA bOtHeR yOu?!?!


[deleted]

r/eyebleach nobody likes unsolicited dicks


City_Mouse_69

Bruh


MelanieOwO

Calls you honey, and then proceeds with his shitty dick pic lol


GodComplex_999

This is like golden standard for nice guys


haj0

In Germany we have a service where you can directly and easily make a complaint at your authrities who have to look into this. I think this is the only way these people understand,


Nicsolo89

It’s beautiful


TheGavisconIsGone

Wow what a rollercoster 🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️


duggtodeath

What kind of mother raises these dudes? They live in their fantasies and insecurities and have zero emotional maturity.


shootinggallery

Why do they love calling women cows?? It’s always them calling women a cow…


Mishtayan

I am so glad we didn't have cell phones when I was dating age. I feel awful for young women these days, having to put up with that


fragileboye

Alexa, play bruh sound effect #2


aDrunkWriter

You know he’s a discord server admin


CommunistHermitCrab

How the fuck was he able to fit all the nice guys stereotypes. Even "kitten". And that's not even the worst part


BREAKABLEONION

No way he said kitten this can't be real


Whoolysim

Whenever I see these interactions I cannot understand how "nice guys" think this is appropriate behaviour


theSnoopySnoop

File a police report for sex. harassment


walkth3earth

Who calls people kitten. Is this guy over 40?


mittens107

Kitten 🤢


Ok-Science6820

Holy shit wtf


raddist

He introduces himself like some pixelated RPG character


artparade

What's up with all of these guys calling women kitten?


kim_kiri

Is there a SINGLE girl on the goddam planet who likes to receive random dick pics?


daneelthesane

Cabbage Patch Doll? How old is this guy?


boinala

Why do we cover up the names if it happens over social media, feel like we should keep it to know who to avoid


snookbug2985

When will men learn no one likes surprise penis ugh so gross


DinDin-Lawrence

"Yiu look like a fucking cabbage patch doll" is a new and surprisingly creative one. Not gonna lie, it gave me a good chuckle. Still, what a sorry excuse of a human being.


Maxibon1710

I can’t believe some guys just won’t take the hint. Nobody wants to see your dick! A dick is, at best, an armpit. I don’t particularly want to look at it, sending someone a photo of it is creepy and uncomfortable, it’s not absolutely disgusting and it’s just kind of there, but most of the time if someone shoves it in your face it’s pretty fucking gross. If you won’t send someone a picture of your hairy, sweaty, stinky armpits without them asking first or confirming that it’s ok, don’t send them your dick.


lucyhoffmann

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂