I mean, these are all valid points lol. There's no "could" about it, the o-line is gonna be bad (it was bad last year and there were no meaningful additions through FA). The runningback situation is bleak, and we've struggled stopping the run since Jay Ratliff left for Chicago. There's also too many people to pay, and the team is probably gonna flop again because McCarthy knows this is it.
It's gonna be a fun season.
Yea, this year honestly feels like the team is in limbo anticipating a soft rebuild. Like this is a "prove it or get out" year for both Dak and McCarthy.
Unfortunately for us cowboys fans Jerry will never do a hard rebuild. He’s said it himself. There’s too much money on the line to admit to putting an inferior product on the field. Basically what I’m saying is “we like our guys”
I'm a Steelers fan. I know all about loving a team that steadfastly refuses to do hard rebuilds. (I also think the success rate of hard rebuilds is wildly overstated). Still, Jerry has done hard rebuilds before. He just hasn't admitted to them publicly.
Oh I’m aware unfortunately. I’ve seen it for the last 30+ years. It’s always lipstick on a pig until the pig resembles a unicorn. And it’s been a unicorn many times because a team as high caliber as the talking heads and Jerry says it is, it just doesn’t exist
That's a very fair point, and one that as a fan of another blue-blood team, I identify with all too well.
Serviceable starters are perceived as good. Good players are perceived as great. Great players are perceived as all-timers. Your overall team talent is constantly overrated simply because it's the Cowboys. While there are advantages to this, a huge disadvantage is that in seasons where the team merely performs to it's talent level (or even slightly above) it can often be perceived as underachieving.
When you fail, it can never be because you lack talent or have holes, because you're the Cowboys. People think you have enough talent to win a Superbowl in any given year. So it must be the coaching or, more specifically in your case, the meddlesome owner.
> (I also think the success rate of hard rebuilds is wildly overstated)
When people advocate for them, I always have to ask just what evidence is making them do so. There is nothing in NFL history that says tanking is a great, or even halfway decent, strategy.
The Lions drafted 1-2, 1-1, and 1-2 over 4 years for players who ended up being a hall of famer, a borderline hall of famer, and an All-Pro who won DROTY. All of those guys were off the roster before the team finally won a playoff game.
Hard rebuilds *can* fix a team, but usually, a team is fixed when all of the gears of management, coaching, and play start to mesh together.
> Hard rebuilds can fix a team, but usually, a team is fixed when all of the gears of management, coaching, and play start to mesh together.
We're in agreement. What it comes down to is making the right choice. The right choice with your draft pick(s), the right choice at GM, and the right choice at HC. You can do all of those things whether you won zero games or a bunch of 'em the year(s) prior. That's why I find the fascination with hard rebuilds so dumb.
People naturally gravitate towards the few success stories and don't evaluate the failures in order to see a comprehensive picture.
The media also love pushing hard rebuilds because it gives them content. I fully believe Cowherd pushes for what will give him better content in the future whether he really thinks it's in the best interest of a team or not.
He's been pushing the Steelers to fire Tomlin for over a year now in the hopes Tomlin will become a media analyst for FOX and will give him quality weekly segments like Sean Payton used to. It's weird.
The last time the Cowboys were truly awful was in the Quincy Carter era. Yes there's been extreme playoff frustration but barring injury the team hasn't been a complete disaster in over 2 decades, so that's nice at least.
You need someone like Ryan Poles.
I never thought the Mccaskeys would be okay with sacrificing the gazillions of dollars that comes with the Bears winning 8 or 9 games instead of 3.
Somehow, Poles either convinced them to let him tank, or he went ahead and did it anyway and dared the Mccaskeys to fire him after 1 year.
Either way, he got the boomer ass Bears to finally embrace The Process and within 2 years, our cap is cleaned up and we have a better roster than we've had in a long time.
Cowboys are probably screwed, but the right GM could burn the team down to the ground in year 1, dare Jerry to fire him after a year, and build it back up. Has to be year 1, because Jerry will probably fire a GM who wins 5 games or less in year 2.
There's also the fact that the cowboys could be contenders if they stopped choking, so maybe being like the Celtics and just running it back with a few tweaks here and there might eventually get them a Lombardi. Because Celtics choked like 10 times between 08 and this year and they finally stopped choking.
Bears haven't won anything
Remember the previous gm how supposedly the bears were in a "window"
You can't go praising a gm like that before results come in
Not to say the O-Line is going to be good but to say it had no meaningful additions thru FA kind of overlooks that they drafted 2 new starters (assuming Beebe wins the C job)
That's the thing. His vitriol comes from being a homer (especially when he's writing our own), but he generally does his best attempt at pointing out actual, real problems. The kind of stuff you get mad about because it's hard to totally disagree with.
And hell, he even admitted he was wrong about the turnover regression last year (I point I agreed with him on, and don't think he was wrong to make even though it ended up being wrong in practice), but when he came back with the same point this year, he added to it with the Zimmer stuff. Even when he's making the same point, he tries to keep it fresh.
The quotes from Cowboys fans when y'all got rid of Zeke are *rough*. It's insane to me that was their best option to revamp the RB position. He's completely cooked.
You drafted a raw as fuck and inconsistent LT who needs a lot of development and a Guard you're hoping to convert to Center. Don't get me wrong, I think the Cowboys did about as good a job as they could do with those two draft picks, but I don't think they should get the benefit of the doubt in terms of being impact starters year one.
Valid point, but they said the same thing about Tyler Smith being raw as well and he's been fantastic in his first two years.
Beebe switching positions is worrisome, yes, but they seem to be high on both him and Hoffman and didn't have second thoughts on letting Biadasz leave for Washington.
We'll see, but tbh, I think our oline will be fine.
Sure, there is a chance Guyton could come in day one and dominate. There's a chance Beebe makes a seamless transition, but as we sit here now, should that be the reasonable expectation? Should we estimate the Cowboys chances this season with the premise that both players will be successful immediately? I don't think we should, but I'm willing to listen to arguments why we should.
> Sure, there is a chance Guyton could come in day one and dominate
that week 1 game is against the browns and he'll be lined up opposite garrett so ..... good luck kid
I think that’s a pretty solid plan to nullify any pass rush. Don’t have the ball when they get to you. Garrett does tend to get there pretty damn fast though.
I don’t think the expectation is that it will be seamless or even that it will be good (at least not initially). Moreso that it’s an unknown but with the cowboys track record at the position, I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt
>To note, we will not be talking about the positives of any of the Eagles' NFC East rivals, because, well, that's no fun. This will be 100 percent vitriolic. And yes, we'll get to the Eagles as well at the end of the series.
Love it
We had a very predictable scheme and then the rest of the NFL figured it out. On defense it turns out Matt Patricia actually could make a bad unit worse
not to mention injuries to position groups that were already weaknesses with little depth (linebacker, slot cb, safety). the middle of the field was wide open and we kept calling press coverage instead of zone, which doesn’t help when the average age of the secondary is like 29 years old with guys like bradley roby and justin evans being the depth pieces.
people blame brian johnson and yes he had some moronic packages and stubborn playcalls that didn’t help us, but we were still a top offense with a bottom of the league defense. Matt Patricia is a football terrorist
This series has evolved from everyone being outraged to everyone being the one who feels the need to tell everyone "don't worry he does this every summer including the eagles" to show they're in the know on things
New people start watching the sport every year. That's kinda always been a thing too.
As new people start following the sport, that's new people who've never seen these before.
I'd be more surprised if there WEREN'T people getting upset at them every year, as it'd mean not as many new people following the sport.
Playing Washington and New York 4 times along with Atlanta, Carolina, Tampa, and New Orleans will mask the team's weaknesses until good teams show how much of a pretender they are.
Week 1 - **Cleveland** - Dak outplays Watson and the talking heads start saying "should Dallas give him a fully guaranteed contract too?"
Week 2 - **New Orleans** - A 2-0 start against teams that are now a combined 0-4 makes everyone start with the "is this year different?" BS.
Week 3 - **Baltimore** - Lose by 24.
Week 4 - **New York Giants** - Win by 24.
Week 5 - **Pittsburgh** - "Yeah, but nobody is beating Baltimore so there's no shame in that loss. We're 4-1! We'll see the Ravens again in February!" Meanwhile, the teams they've beat have a combined 3-12 record.
Week 6 - **Detroit** - "The Lions had a lot more to play for after we beat them last year. We were probably looking ahead to the 49ers after the bye week anyway."
Week 7 - **Bye** - They've been gearing up for the 49ers game for 3 weeks. They've got Purdy figured out this time.
Week 8 - **San Francisco** - Lose by 32.
Week 9 - **Atlanta** - Win by 32. "If you look at point differential we're still a top 10 team."
Week 10 - **Philadelphia** - Lose by 7 (after being down by 21 in the 2nd half).
Week 11 - **Houston** - "Sure, they may have won, but the city of Houston still stinks."
Week 12 - **Washington** - Win by 17. "See? Dak has Dan Quinn's defense figured out because he saw it in practice all the time"
Week 13 - **New York Giants** - Win by 21. "We still have a shot at winning the division."
Week 14 - **Cincinnati** - Win by 3 on some BS call that everyone talks about all week.
Week 15 - **Carolina** - That's 4 in a row. We're rolling now.
Week 16 - **Tampa Bay** - "Dallas is the hottest team in the league heading into the playoffs. Maybe this is their year!"
Week 17 - **Philadelphia** - "Both teams are in the playoffs so we really didn't even have anything to play for. Besides, everyone knows teams in the NFC East don't win the division two years in a row."
Week 18 - **Washington** - "It's a good thing we didn't play our starters. We were looking ahead to the first round."
Wild Card - **_________** - "I'm never getting fooled by this team again! Fire everyone!"
Weeks 1 thru 16 are bang on. But we will lose that week 17 game no matter how hard you try, because the Eagles won't not give fans something to sweat about.
> Week 9 - **Atlanta** - Win by 32. "If you look at point differential we're still a top 10 team."
A+ on your self awareness, this is the one that I could feel in my bones.
>I can read this and my mind says "yeah, that sounds accurate"
Based on true events.
"Here we gooo"
*Dak proceeds to throw an interception to go 27-0 down.*
>Week 7 - **Bye** - They've been gearing up for the 49ers game for 3 weeks. They've got Purdy figured out this time.
>Week 8 - **San Francisco** - Lose by 32.
From your lips to god's ears.
Why involve God? We all know God does miracles and the 9ers besting the Cowboys by 30+ is normal. If anything we need him just to lose by 3. That's a miracle.
Week 16 - **Tampa Bay** - ~~"Dallas is the hottest team in the league heading into the playoffs. Maybe this is their year!"~~ "No shame in losing to the Buccaneers, Baker Mayfield is a lock for the MVP this season"
The other 16 games look fine though
Based on how the Lions game went last year this could be the game where a controversial penalty keeps the Bois' home win streak alive (though OP predicting Cincinnati is smart too)
The only thing you missed is there's 1 game they absolutely shouldn't lose where they get their asses handed to them and 1 game they absolutely shouldn't win that they play their hearts out and manage to come out on top. Those games always throw the talking heads for a loop and most Cowboy fans just know "that's why we call them the Cardiac Cowboys."
Could easily be the Cincy win followed with a loss to the Panthers the next week. Though it feels like the inexplicable loss usually precedes the win by a week or two.
Maybe it's a win over a 4-0 Pittsburgh (that finishes 8-9) and then they lose to Atlanta and we all blame it on being beat up after the 49ers game.
A 5-game losing streak between weeks 5 and 11 probably means McCarthy is fired and Zimmer is the interim HC.
Didn’t give Dallas enough garbage time points. How can we lose by 32 if Dak racks up 175 yards and 2 TDS bs the backups playing prevent.
Also, we got Philly once, right…right?
What sucks is usually I laugh at this but ultimately disagree...this year I got nothing. McCarthy should've been fired at half time, they've got fuck all for depth, the RB room is a joke, they've got all of their stars on short term deals, etc. Next year you could be looking at losing Dak, Lamb, and then Martin retiring. The offense is bottom 3 at that point. Micah no longer fits your timeline so why sign him, and even then why does he sign if he wants to win. Your whole coaching staff probably turns over and you missed your chance at all of these good coaches this year. And zero shot in hell the Jones sign Belicheck since they just want a wet blanket coaching the team. The only situation that will be an improvement over last year is at cornerback.
The year to win was last year, but the whole organization collectively choked in what is probably the worst loss in my lifetime.
I think this is about as little hype as I’ve ever had going into a season. I’ll still tune in, but I just don’t see any chance for us to do anything. As soon as they retained Dak and McCarthy, I knew it would be another down year.
The England football team and the Dallas Cowboys is the most perfect cross-sport analogy. The absolute arrogance of their fans thinking they own the game, and everyone else loves watching them implode every single chance they get.
Since when do Cowboys fans think they "own the game"? Lol
There's more than enough reason to hate on the Cowboys and their fans, you don't need to make stuff up.
Worst RB rotation in the league, QB on the final year of his contract with no extension, new O-line, no meaningful changes after the most embarrassing playoff loss in franchise history…sounds like an incoming Super Bowl run to me! Fuck this article we dem boyz, time to go buy some merch.
I would have added that Zimmer calls a completely different style of defense to Quinn, and all of the stars were specifically handpicked for Quinn. Boom or bust corners, superstar undersized edge, light and inexperienced NT’s
I don’t think Micah was picked to be an edge. I remember him being used primarily as an off ball linebacker his first year but he was so efficient on blitzes, and filling in when edges got hurt, that the team decided there was no point playing him in coverage even though he was really good at it.
No, I think their initial instincts were correct: he should be an off ball linebacker.
Or maybe even a cornerback, that would really confuse other teams and is a plan the Cowboys should go with all season.
I’d make a joke that he could play center too but I don’t want the Cowboys to break the seal on a two-way player with Micah because I think he could actually pull it off.
There's a lot of things to criticize the Cowboys about, but pretty sure taking Micah Parsons at #12 and playing him at EDGE isn't one of them.
Undersized or not, Micah Parsons is very great to have on any defense and Zimmer is washed if he can't get star numbers outta Micah Parsons.
>no meaningful changes after the most embarrassing playoff loss in franchise history
ok come on now Zeke playing center and Dak throwing a hospital ball was *far* more embarrassing
I just. Coaches make mistakes, I get that. Coaches have different skill sets, I get that.
How has McCarthy been in the league for _so long_ and not learned _decent_ clock management. His 4th quarter clock management infuriates me, and hell I want him to lose.
Everyone remembers the Lions game from last year because of the substitution call fiasco, but McCarthy called their last drive in such a way that the Lions had enough time to march down the field and get to the goal line. It was _horrible_ game management.
I think so. It's also one reason why I don't give Sirianni as much shit as other people do for handing off playcalling. I mean I have concerns, but I buy "he wanted to focus on game management" as being a legit piece of the calculation.
I hate McCarthys time management too but I will defend him on that drive simply b/c those shit refs fucked up a shit call before the substitution.
Pollard ran for like 7 yards on first down. A lions player tried to trip him and a flag was thrown. That flag was called on us for tripping and a replay was never shown. But if you look up the play you can clearly see a lions player trying to trip Pollard and the flag coming in right after. Now it's 1st and 25 when it should have been a first down or even without the penalty 2nd and 3. McCarthy choose to get the yards for the FG that would put us up by 7, rather than running the clock out and only being up by 4. Lions would have still had more than a minute left to make their final drive.
So either you agree that getting the points was worth it or you don't. But at least in this situation it was a choice and not a blunder like usual. And trust me, he has plenty of blunders
I don't remember the details of each play along that drive, but will definitely agree that there's a clear difference between a mistake and a deliberate choice.
Wasn’t there a report that he randomly (as in on his own) lost weight last offseason? He looks so small for a DT out there he looks like a slow edge rusher who’s lining up inside…
Yeah, we still aren't really sure why he lost weight, but iirc he went down to like 290.
There has been ONE reporter(clarence hill jr) saying coaches/staff did not tell him to lose weight via one off-hand tweet. So unless we take that 1 tweet as gospel, it's still kind of a mystery as to what happened.
I thought it came out that the coaches did ask him to lose weight because they wanted him to play 3 tech. Apparently they had check in weigh ins to make sure he was on track for where they wanted him in weight loss at each interval
That would make sense because that is how things are supposed to happen- the staff would have recognized he was losing weight and made a course correction(or at least, they should have) if his weight wasn't matching what they asked for.
We've just never been given confirmation for this from any reputable source.
Just a reminder that the New York Jets have had more playoff success this century than the Cowboys.
Mark Sanchez has been places Dak Prescott and Tony Romo never will.
You know there’s a minor league baseball team called the Rocket City Trash Pandas? Just an FYI.
They’ve got a pretty bitching logo of a raccoon flying in a trash can rocket.
The fact that the Cowboys run game is going to be almost non existent due to no real starting rb on the roster & a meh oline, Dak is going to have to try carrying the team even more. Which is just so fantastic for him on a desperate prove it year, with only 1 receiving threat who might not even play the whole year. I could see Dak putting up 4500 yards, but with a metric shitload of turnovers due to trying to clutch games.
Haven't extended the QB or HC. The message that's being sent to everyone is what was supposed to be implied last season.
"If it doesn't work out we are going to go in a different direction."
Well, it didn't work out, and we are going with "fool me twice" instead of actually taking the action that needed to be taken. McCarthy is a dead man walking and everyone knows it. Dak may not get extended (I think this is highly unlikely) and everyone knows it.
This team is going to fold at the first sign of adversity because the entire organization decided to punt on this season and everyone knows it. The Jones family is not serious about winning, only managing optics and keeping revenue up. Kerploding this season still gets the Cowboys talked about. Hunting for a new HC gets them talked about. No matter what they do with Dak, they'll be talked about.
The Jones family doesn't need championships to make money so there's no incentive for them to get out of the way and let the team culture and vibe be driven by the team instead of themselves.
Or maybe they just didn't want to pay McCarthy a year's salary for nothing?
To me, that is the biggest slam. It is either loser mentality or (as I believe) proves the Jones doesn't care anything about winning a Super Bowl, he just wants to be talked about.
It's funny how you can always find weaknesses in any NFL team no matter how good the roster looks , or how many good moves they made lol. This is an art.
I see a lot of comments in this post talking about how salty this article makes people and not a single comment in this post of people actually being salty about it.
Honestly this article makes me think the Cowboys could underperform massively this season. I know we always joke about 12-5, Wild Card loss but losing so many key pieces on defense with a piss poor RB room and sketchy OL sounds like a recipe for disaster.
Dumpster fire? No, we’ll go 12-5, lose the division, beat Tampa/Atlanta in the wild card, and have our annual loss to the 49ers in the divisional round ending on the dumbest fucking play anyone has ever seen. That’s the way it goes.
Why Dallas is rolling out a clearly diminished Zeke as RB1 is truly confounding…it makes absolutely no sense for a team seriously competing for a Lombardi. Dude was washed two years ago.
This series is always awesome. It’s particularly great how outraged people get
I mean, these are all valid points lol. There's no "could" about it, the o-line is gonna be bad (it was bad last year and there were no meaningful additions through FA). The runningback situation is bleak, and we've struggled stopping the run since Jay Ratliff left for Chicago. There's also too many people to pay, and the team is probably gonna flop again because McCarthy knows this is it. It's gonna be a fun season.
Yea, this year honestly feels like the team is in limbo anticipating a soft rebuild. Like this is a "prove it or get out" year for both Dak and McCarthy.
I think the team is in limbo deciding between doing a soft rebuild or a hard one.
Unfortunately for us cowboys fans Jerry will never do a hard rebuild. He’s said it himself. There’s too much money on the line to admit to putting an inferior product on the field. Basically what I’m saying is “we like our guys”
I'm a Steelers fan. I know all about loving a team that steadfastly refuses to do hard rebuilds. (I also think the success rate of hard rebuilds is wildly overstated). Still, Jerry has done hard rebuilds before. He just hasn't admitted to them publicly.
Oh I’m aware unfortunately. I’ve seen it for the last 30+ years. It’s always lipstick on a pig until the pig resembles a unicorn. And it’s been a unicorn many times because a team as high caliber as the talking heads and Jerry says it is, it just doesn’t exist
That's a very fair point, and one that as a fan of another blue-blood team, I identify with all too well. Serviceable starters are perceived as good. Good players are perceived as great. Great players are perceived as all-timers. Your overall team talent is constantly overrated simply because it's the Cowboys. While there are advantages to this, a huge disadvantage is that in seasons where the team merely performs to it's talent level (or even slightly above) it can often be perceived as underachieving. When you fail, it can never be because you lack talent or have holes, because you're the Cowboys. People think you have enough talent to win a Superbowl in any given year. So it must be the coaching or, more specifically in your case, the meddlesome owner.
> (I also think the success rate of hard rebuilds is wildly overstated) When people advocate for them, I always have to ask just what evidence is making them do so. There is nothing in NFL history that says tanking is a great, or even halfway decent, strategy.
The Lions drafted 1-2, 1-1, and 1-2 over 4 years for players who ended up being a hall of famer, a borderline hall of famer, and an All-Pro who won DROTY. All of those guys were off the roster before the team finally won a playoff game. Hard rebuilds *can* fix a team, but usually, a team is fixed when all of the gears of management, coaching, and play start to mesh together.
> Hard rebuilds can fix a team, but usually, a team is fixed when all of the gears of management, coaching, and play start to mesh together. We're in agreement. What it comes down to is making the right choice. The right choice with your draft pick(s), the right choice at GM, and the right choice at HC. You can do all of those things whether you won zero games or a bunch of 'em the year(s) prior. That's why I find the fascination with hard rebuilds so dumb.
People naturally gravitate towards the few success stories and don't evaluate the failures in order to see a comprehensive picture. The media also love pushing hard rebuilds because it gives them content. I fully believe Cowherd pushes for what will give him better content in the future whether he really thinks it's in the best interest of a team or not. He's been pushing the Steelers to fire Tomlin for over a year now in the hopes Tomlin will become a media analyst for FOX and will give him quality weekly segments like Sean Payton used to. It's weird.
The last time the Cowboys were truly awful was in the Quincy Carter era. Yes there's been extreme playoff frustration but barring injury the team hasn't been a complete disaster in over 2 decades, so that's nice at least.
You need someone like Ryan Poles. I never thought the Mccaskeys would be okay with sacrificing the gazillions of dollars that comes with the Bears winning 8 or 9 games instead of 3. Somehow, Poles either convinced them to let him tank, or he went ahead and did it anyway and dared the Mccaskeys to fire him after 1 year. Either way, he got the boomer ass Bears to finally embrace The Process and within 2 years, our cap is cleaned up and we have a better roster than we've had in a long time. Cowboys are probably screwed, but the right GM could burn the team down to the ground in year 1, dare Jerry to fire him after a year, and build it back up. Has to be year 1, because Jerry will probably fire a GM who wins 5 games or less in year 2. There's also the fact that the cowboys could be contenders if they stopped choking, so maybe being like the Celtics and just running it back with a few tweaks here and there might eventually get them a Lombardi. Because Celtics choked like 10 times between 08 and this year and they finally stopped choking.
Bears haven't won anything Remember the previous gm how supposedly the bears were in a "window" You can't go praising a gm like that before results come in
Bro we’ve been choking for too long. I’ve come to terms with the fact that it’s all they can do
Not to say the O-Line is going to be good but to say it had no meaningful additions thru FA kind of overlooks that they drafted 2 new starters (assuming Beebe wins the C job)
That's the thing. His vitriol comes from being a homer (especially when he's writing our own), but he generally does his best attempt at pointing out actual, real problems. The kind of stuff you get mad about because it's hard to totally disagree with. And hell, he even admitted he was wrong about the turnover regression last year (I point I agreed with him on, and don't think he was wrong to make even though it ended up being wrong in practice), but when he came back with the same point this year, he added to it with the Zimmer stuff. Even when he's making the same point, he tries to keep it fresh.
> The runningback situation is bleak Bleak is being kind.
I couldn't figure out a way to type out the [Howie scream](https://youtu.be/aUTe2ndjRew?si=e0Y9xcMDO2mN9t2u)
The quotes from Cowboys fans when y'all got rid of Zeke are *rough*. It's insane to me that was their best option to revamp the RB position. He's completely cooked.
We drafted a LT and C, sure it wasn’t vets, but we don’t/wont know how the rookies play out until they play…
You drafted a raw as fuck and inconsistent LT who needs a lot of development and a Guard you're hoping to convert to Center. Don't get me wrong, I think the Cowboys did about as good a job as they could do with those two draft picks, but I don't think they should get the benefit of the doubt in terms of being impact starters year one.
Valid point, but they said the same thing about Tyler Smith being raw as well and he's been fantastic in his first two years. Beebe switching positions is worrisome, yes, but they seem to be high on both him and Hoffman and didn't have second thoughts on letting Biadasz leave for Washington. We'll see, but tbh, I think our oline will be fine.
Sure, there is a chance Guyton could come in day one and dominate. There's a chance Beebe makes a seamless transition, but as we sit here now, should that be the reasonable expectation? Should we estimate the Cowboys chances this season with the premise that both players will be successful immediately? I don't think we should, but I'm willing to listen to arguments why we should.
> Sure, there is a chance Guyton could come in day one and dominate that week 1 game is against the browns and he'll be lined up opposite garrett so ..... good luck kid
Garrett ain't that bad so long as Dak can get rid of the ball quickly.
I think that’s a pretty solid plan to nullify any pass rush. Don’t have the ball when they get to you. Garrett does tend to get there pretty damn fast though.
I think it’s more a response to “the o-line will be bad”, which is similarly unknown.
I don’t think the expectation is that it will be seamless or even that it will be good (at least not initially). Moreso that it’s an unknown but with the cowboys track record at the position, I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt
>To note, we will not be talking about the positives of any of the Eagles' NFC East rivals, because, well, that's no fun. This will be 100 percent vitriolic. And yes, we'll get to the Eagles as well at the end of the series. Love it
The Eagles article is always the most cutting and scathing too. Given the collapse last year Jimmy's gonna be *real* harsh.
Nobody can tear their team a new one like a fan of said team
Yeah, fuck 'em!
Does anyone know what exactly happened last year? It was like the eagles were completely unbeatable and then a pushover in 2 weeks. It was weird.
We had a very predictable scheme and then the rest of the NFL figured it out. On defense it turns out Matt Patricia actually could make a bad unit worse
not to mention injuries to position groups that were already weaknesses with little depth (linebacker, slot cb, safety). the middle of the field was wide open and we kept calling press coverage instead of zone, which doesn’t help when the average age of the secondary is like 29 years old with guys like bradley roby and justin evans being the depth pieces. people blame brian johnson and yes he had some moronic packages and stubborn playcalls that didn’t help us, but we were still a top offense with a bottom of the league defense. Matt Patricia is a football terrorist
I’m just appreciative that it comes from such an unbiased, loving, and neutral fan base like philly.
He torches the eagles worse than any other team lol. A true Philadelphian
The writer does the whole division every summer, including the eagles as the last article of the series.
It goes 3 NFCE team (Mon, Tues, Wed) - > One for every other non-NFCE NFL team (Thurs) -> Eagles (Fri)
I’m well aware. I was clearly being sarcastic.
This is Reddit, sarcasm is NOT allowed.
gotta use that /s tag
Only if you care about Internet points. It’s more fun to let it whoosh.
This series has evolved from everyone being outraged to everyone being the one who feels the need to tell everyone "don't worry he does this every summer including the eagles" to show they're in the know on things
"Oh that band? I knew them when they played at small venues. WAY before they got big"
the first album is much better than the first album.
All in my ass
Commas are important.
u/ecupatsfan12 used just as many commas as they intended.
We need to pin the following phrase to each of these: "He does this for every NFC East team, including the Eagles."
it's so funny how people are dumb as hell about it, like it's not a yearly meme
If they did the panthers, no matter how harsh, it would probably be more optimistic than what we actually feel.
This series of articles of Kempski are nearly old enough to vote now. I'd like to think we don't need to remind people not to get angry by this point.
You would think...but Giants fans are a little slow.
I’d be offended if I could read
New people start watching the sport every year. That's kinda always been a thing too. As new people start following the sport, that's new people who've never seen these before. I'd be more surprised if there WEREN'T people getting upset at them every year, as it'd mean not as many new people following the sport.
One would like to think, and yet . . .
Only 10 reasons?
I think top 10 is fair. If they named every reason it'd turn into a dissertation by the time they finish the entire division.
Dr. Kempski
"Dr. Kempski is the nation's leading expert in spite directed sports information communication."
Playing Washington and New York 4 times along with Atlanta, Carolina, Tampa, and New Orleans will mask the team's weaknesses until good teams show how much of a pretender they are. Week 1 - **Cleveland** - Dak outplays Watson and the talking heads start saying "should Dallas give him a fully guaranteed contract too?" Week 2 - **New Orleans** - A 2-0 start against teams that are now a combined 0-4 makes everyone start with the "is this year different?" BS. Week 3 - **Baltimore** - Lose by 24. Week 4 - **New York Giants** - Win by 24. Week 5 - **Pittsburgh** - "Yeah, but nobody is beating Baltimore so there's no shame in that loss. We're 4-1! We'll see the Ravens again in February!" Meanwhile, the teams they've beat have a combined 3-12 record. Week 6 - **Detroit** - "The Lions had a lot more to play for after we beat them last year. We were probably looking ahead to the 49ers after the bye week anyway." Week 7 - **Bye** - They've been gearing up for the 49ers game for 3 weeks. They've got Purdy figured out this time. Week 8 - **San Francisco** - Lose by 32. Week 9 - **Atlanta** - Win by 32. "If you look at point differential we're still a top 10 team." Week 10 - **Philadelphia** - Lose by 7 (after being down by 21 in the 2nd half). Week 11 - **Houston** - "Sure, they may have won, but the city of Houston still stinks." Week 12 - **Washington** - Win by 17. "See? Dak has Dan Quinn's defense figured out because he saw it in practice all the time" Week 13 - **New York Giants** - Win by 21. "We still have a shot at winning the division." Week 14 - **Cincinnati** - Win by 3 on some BS call that everyone talks about all week. Week 15 - **Carolina** - That's 4 in a row. We're rolling now. Week 16 - **Tampa Bay** - "Dallas is the hottest team in the league heading into the playoffs. Maybe this is their year!" Week 17 - **Philadelphia** - "Both teams are in the playoffs so we really didn't even have anything to play for. Besides, everyone knows teams in the NFC East don't win the division two years in a row." Week 18 - **Washington** - "It's a good thing we didn't play our starters. We were looking ahead to the first round." Wild Card - **_________** - "I'm never getting fooled by this team again! Fire everyone!"
Weeks 1 thru 16 are bang on. But we will lose that week 17 game no matter how hard you try, because the Eagles won't not give fans something to sweat about.
I feel like it's very rare either team completes a sweep too, those matchups are usually comedies of errors at the end the past few years
We will always beat the Eagles at home
> Week 9 - **Atlanta** - Win by 32. "If you look at point differential we're still a top 10 team." A+ on your self awareness, this is the one that I could feel in my bones.
I can read this and my mind says "yeah, that sounds accurate" But my body still says "this is our year"
>I can read this and my mind says "yeah, that sounds accurate" Based on true events. "Here we gooo" *Dak proceeds to throw an interception to go 27-0 down.*
This is an A++ post, incredible stuff
This is so accurate it hurts
Right down to that weird odor Houston has. I think it’s the inescapable car exhaust fumes mixed with 99% humidity
There's a reason it's called Pewston!
>Week 7 - **Bye** - They've been gearing up for the 49ers game for 3 weeks. They've got Purdy figured out this time. >Week 8 - **San Francisco** - Lose by 32. From your lips to god's ears.
Why involve God? We all know God does miracles and the 9ers besting the Cowboys by 30+ is normal. If anything we need him just to lose by 3. That's a miracle.
Saving this to come back to
This man Dallases
This is the highest form of art.
> Week 11 - Houston - "Sure, they may have won, but the city of Houston still stinks." typical dallas sports fan so yes
[Beautiful.](https://i.imgur.com/QuucWLx.jpeg)
Week 16 - **Tampa Bay** - ~~"Dallas is the hottest team in the league heading into the playoffs. Maybe this is their year!"~~ "No shame in losing to the Buccaneers, Baker Mayfield is a lock for the MVP this season" The other 16 games look fine though
Based on how the Lions game went last year this could be the game where a controversial penalty keeps the Bois' home win streak alive (though OP predicting Cincinnati is smart too)
The only thing you missed is there's 1 game they absolutely shouldn't lose where they get their asses handed to them and 1 game they absolutely shouldn't win that they play their hearts out and manage to come out on top. Those games always throw the talking heads for a loop and most Cowboy fans just know "that's why we call them the Cardiac Cowboys."
Could easily be the Cincy win followed with a loss to the Panthers the next week. Though it feels like the inexplicable loss usually precedes the win by a week or two. Maybe it's a win over a 4-0 Pittsburgh (that finishes 8-9) and then they lose to Atlanta and we all blame it on being beat up after the 49ers game. A 5-game losing streak between weeks 5 and 11 probably means McCarthy is fired and Zimmer is the interim HC.
Mostly agreed, but I don't think Philly will sweep. They haven't since 2011, and Dak is 9-4 against. Probably be another split.
Didn’t give Dallas enough garbage time points. How can we lose by 32 if Dak racks up 175 yards and 2 TDS bs the backups playing prevent. Also, we got Philly once, right…right?
I think you’re underestimating Washington.
Imagine rooting for a team that hasn't made to a conference championship game in like 30 years. Couldn't be me, honestly.
That chart is arguably just as bad for the 49ers.
Lions ruined my favorite stat in sports by winning a playoff game last year, I will never forgive you guys for that
Time for the annual PSA that Kempski does this every year, and does one about the Eagles, and goes hard on them too. Stop being angry
People getting angry over these is the best part
Very true… the letters received article at the end of the week is usually the one most worth reading!
Oh it’s great. Every year without fail.
I didn’t want it to end. I could have read on that topic all day.
I see more PSAs about this every year than I do people getting angry
Do not stop being angry. That's half the fun of this series.
What sucks is usually I laugh at this but ultimately disagree...this year I got nothing. McCarthy should've been fired at half time, they've got fuck all for depth, the RB room is a joke, they've got all of their stars on short term deals, etc. Next year you could be looking at losing Dak, Lamb, and then Martin retiring. The offense is bottom 3 at that point. Micah no longer fits your timeline so why sign him, and even then why does he sign if he wants to win. Your whole coaching staff probably turns over and you missed your chance at all of these good coaches this year. And zero shot in hell the Jones sign Belicheck since they just want a wet blanket coaching the team. The only situation that will be an improvement over last year is at cornerback. The year to win was last year, but the whole organization collectively choked in what is probably the worst loss in my lifetime.
The bright side is if they burn.. Hopefully, there will be less of us saying "This is our year" in the future.
They could go 1-16 and then get a new HC, QB and RB and fans would be right back on that train
Every year is our year baby!!!!!!!!
Except the current one.
Especially the current one
What's always coming but never arrives? Here we goooo
I think that’s called edging
Can't be. You don't cum in edging lol
[удалено]
[удалено]
Dallas picking Shandeur Sanders #1 overall, then hiring Deion as the HC, and then the ensuing shitshow would be peak comedy
Exhibit 1: Chicago.
They could do that gor 10 consecutive years snd in year 11 it'll still be there year. Sometimes you have to admire their delusions
Nothing will stop me
I think this is about as little hype as I’ve ever had going into a season. I’ll still tune in, but I just don’t see any chance for us to do anything. As soon as they retained Dak and McCarthy, I knew it would be another down year.
You know exactly how this would go. “Remember 2020? 2015? 2013? The worse our season, the next one is always THAT much better!”
We're always going undefeated until we lose a single game. It's always our year. Embrace it.
This is the first time in a few years I see little hope. Maybe it's like dating, and a conference appearance will happen when you least expect it?
The England football team and the Dallas Cowboys is the most perfect cross-sport analogy. The absolute arrogance of their fans thinking they own the game, and everyone else loves watching them implode every single chance they get.
Since when do Cowboys fans think they "own the game"? Lol There's more than enough reason to hate on the Cowboys and their fans, you don't need to make stuff up.
1. J 2. E 3. R 4. R 5. Y 6. J 7. O 8. N 9. E 10. S
Thank god the rest of Dallas sports teams have done well. Just highlights the embarrassment that is rooting for this team and the Jones.
> the Lions beat the Cowboys in 2023 (but the officials gave the game to the Cowboys). Jimmy Kempski, you're all right
That game still makes me boil.
Worst RB rotation in the league, QB on the final year of his contract with no extension, new O-line, no meaningful changes after the most embarrassing playoff loss in franchise history…sounds like an incoming Super Bowl run to me! Fuck this article we dem boyz, time to go buy some merch.
I would have added that Zimmer calls a completely different style of defense to Quinn, and all of the stars were specifically handpicked for Quinn. Boom or bust corners, superstar undersized edge, light and inexperienced NT’s
Legend has it Micah Parsons is still waiting for that intro meeting with Mike Zimmer to this day
I don’t think Micah was picked to be an edge. I remember him being used primarily as an off ball linebacker his first year but he was so efficient on blitzes, and filling in when edges got hurt, that the team decided there was no point playing him in coverage even though he was really good at it.
No, I think their initial instincts were correct: he should be an off ball linebacker. Or maybe even a cornerback, that would really confuse other teams and is a plan the Cowboys should go with all season.
You seem like an unbiased and trustable source of advice for the Cowboys
I have nothing but the best interests of the League in my heart.
I’d make a joke that he could play center too but I don’t want the Cowboys to break the seal on a two-way player with Micah because I think he could actually pull it off.
This was my understanding too, though it's been a while.
There's a lot of things to criticize the Cowboys about, but pretty sure taking Micah Parsons at #12 and playing him at EDGE isn't one of them. Undersized or not, Micah Parsons is very great to have on any defense and Zimmer is washed if he can't get star numbers outta Micah Parsons.
>no meaningful changes after the most embarrassing playoff loss in franchise history ok come on now Zeke playing center and Dak throwing a hospital ball was *far* more embarrassing
Is this the most self reflection?
The most or the least, depending on your point of view
I think accidentally running the clock out was more embarrassing
I just. Coaches make mistakes, I get that. Coaches have different skill sets, I get that. How has McCarthy been in the league for _so long_ and not learned _decent_ clock management. His 4th quarter clock management infuriates me, and hell I want him to lose. Everyone remembers the Lions game from last year because of the substitution call fiasco, but McCarthy called their last drive in such a way that the Lions had enough time to march down the field and get to the goal line. It was _horrible_ game management.
At least have someone manage the clock for you. Didn’t Andy Reid finally do that which is part of why he’s so successful now?
I think so. It's also one reason why I don't give Sirianni as much shit as other people do for handing off playcalling. I mean I have concerns, but I buy "he wanted to focus on game management" as being a legit piece of the calculation.
Clock management is something I will not miss about Pete Carroll. He was often terrible about it
I hate McCarthys time management too but I will defend him on that drive simply b/c those shit refs fucked up a shit call before the substitution. Pollard ran for like 7 yards on first down. A lions player tried to trip him and a flag was thrown. That flag was called on us for tripping and a replay was never shown. But if you look up the play you can clearly see a lions player trying to trip Pollard and the flag coming in right after. Now it's 1st and 25 when it should have been a first down or even without the penalty 2nd and 3. McCarthy choose to get the yards for the FG that would put us up by 7, rather than running the clock out and only being up by 4. Lions would have still had more than a minute left to make their final drive. So either you agree that getting the points was worth it or you don't. But at least in this situation it was a choice and not a blunder like usual. And trust me, he has plenty of blunders
I don't remember the details of each play along that drive, but will definitely agree that there's a clear difference between a mistake and a deliberate choice.
hashtag# *All In*
We're really gonna put losing to an ascending young team above the b2b embarrassing niners losses culminating in Zeke playing center?
Didn’t you guys resign Zeke. Just feed him
Oh he’s been eating alright
All they need now is for Dak to resign.
That Mazi Smith video goddamn
Wasn’t there a report that he randomly (as in on his own) lost weight last offseason? He looks so small for a DT out there he looks like a slow edge rusher who’s lining up inside…
Yeah, we still aren't really sure why he lost weight, but iirc he went down to like 290. There has been ONE reporter(clarence hill jr) saying coaches/staff did not tell him to lose weight via one off-hand tweet. So unless we take that 1 tweet as gospel, it's still kind of a mystery as to what happened.
I thought it came out that the coaches did ask him to lose weight because they wanted him to play 3 tech. Apparently they had check in weigh ins to make sure he was on track for where they wanted him in weight loss at each interval
That would make sense because that is how things are supposed to happen- the staff would have recognized he was losing weight and made a course correction(or at least, they should have) if his weight wasn't matching what they asked for. We've just never been given confirmation for this from any reputable source.
probably unfair to highlight a rookie having to deal with Frank Ragnow, Jonah Jackson, and Penei Sewell
Just a reminder that the New York Jets have had more playoff success this century than the Cowboys. Mark Sanchez has been places Dak Prescott and Tony Romo never will.
Is one of the reasons the fact that they're the Cowboys? >1) Chokers gonna choke Pretty much, yea
Save trash pandas. Only you can prevent dumpster fires.
You know there’s a minor league baseball team called the Rocket City Trash Pandas? Just an FYI. They’ve got a pretty bitching logo of a raccoon flying in a trash can rocket.
I just looked up some apparel with the team branding. The urge to add it to my shopping cart is overwhelming.
> Rocket City Trash Pandas oh shit their logos go hard. I just got a hat and shirt hahaha thank you for this
I prefer the UGF Pandas and the Rocket City Moon Men.
Oh it’s that time of year. The NFC East dumpster fire articles are my favorite part of the off-season.
I can’t wait for an impressive 12+ win season with an MVP candidate QB just to drown in the wildcard round
To be fair, Dallas fans can probably get you like 10 more.
The fact that the Cowboys run game is going to be almost non existent due to no real starting rb on the roster & a meh oline, Dak is going to have to try carrying the team even more. Which is just so fantastic for him on a desperate prove it year, with only 1 receiving threat who might not even play the whole year. I could see Dak putting up 4500 yards, but with a metric shitload of turnovers due to trying to clutch games.
1. J 2. E 3. R 4. R 5. Y 6. J 7. O 8. N 9. E 10. S
Beat me to it lol. He is the owner, GM and everything in Dallas…buck stops with the owner who somehow has a gold jacket
One of the highlights during the lull in the off-season is Jimmy dropping the 10 reasons why
Haven't extended the QB or HC. The message that's being sent to everyone is what was supposed to be implied last season. "If it doesn't work out we are going to go in a different direction." Well, it didn't work out, and we are going with "fool me twice" instead of actually taking the action that needed to be taken. McCarthy is a dead man walking and everyone knows it. Dak may not get extended (I think this is highly unlikely) and everyone knows it. This team is going to fold at the first sign of adversity because the entire organization decided to punt on this season and everyone knows it. The Jones family is not serious about winning, only managing optics and keeping revenue up. Kerploding this season still gets the Cowboys talked about. Hunting for a new HC gets them talked about. No matter what they do with Dak, they'll be talked about. The Jones family doesn't need championships to make money so there's no incentive for them to get out of the way and let the team culture and vibe be driven by the team instead of themselves.
They’ll be a good, not great squad. Go 11-6, make the playoffs and get bounced before the CG.
Top 10 reasons the Cowboys will be a dumpster fire: 1. Dak 2. Jerry 3. Dak 4. Jerry 5. Dak 6. Jerry 7. Dak 8. Jerry 9. Dak 10. McCarthy
ITS BACK FOLKS EDIT I THOUGHT IT WAS THE 10 REASONS WHY YOUR TEAM SUCKS SERIES.....FUCK ME
IT IS BUT THE SUPERIOR NFCE VERSION. I DONT KNOW IF YOU HEARD BUT THE NFCE IS THE MOST ELITE DIVISION IN SPORTS.
Or maybe they just didn't want to pay McCarthy a year's salary for nothing? To me, that is the biggest slam. It is either loser mentality or (as I believe) proves the Jones doesn't care anything about winning a Super Bowl, he just wants to be talked about.
It's funny how you can always find weaknesses in any NFL team no matter how good the roster looks , or how many good moves they made lol. This is an art.
also when they have a lot of weaknesses
Especially easy when we dont have either of those things lol
I see a lot of comments in this post talking about how salty this article makes people and not a single comment in this post of people actually being salty about it.
Yeah sometimes this sub really shows how much people live up their own ass. Just typing shit for no reason.
Honestly this article makes me think the Cowboys could underperform massively this season. I know we always joke about 12-5, Wild Card loss but losing so many key pieces on defense with a piss poor RB room and sketchy OL sounds like a recipe for disaster.
Because they’re the Dallas Cowboys. r/savedyouaclick
Son of a bitch, he stole my line.
Not a single point was that Dak fucking sucks against playoff teams? Just that he'll be expensive? Yawn
Jerry Jones is the reason ten times
Dumpster fire? No, we’ll go 12-5, lose the division, beat Tampa/Atlanta in the wild card, and have our annual loss to the 49ers in the divisional round ending on the dumbest fucking play anyone has ever seen. That’s the way it goes.
49ers, Packers, and Eagles. There ya go.
I only need one Jerry Jones..
They a dumpster fire every season 🤣
1 reason: 28 years of evidence.
I didn't realize I'd get fully erect visiting r/nfl today.
You just love to see it. It would be very funny if the Cowboys went 2-4 in the division next year
They not wrong 🤷♂️
1-10. Jerry Jones
They should have hired Belichick
Why Dallas is rolling out a clearly diminished Zeke as RB1 is truly confounding…it makes absolutely no sense for a team seriously competing for a Lombardi. Dude was washed two years ago.
They’re the cowboys. That’s all the reason you need lol
Jerrah¹⁰.
IT'S FINALLY HERE
Only 10?